Klein/Ally Show: The Podcast - Ellina Abovian Returns & So Does Klein's Erection (FULL SHOW 9/11)

Episode Date: September 11, 2026

Today was full of weird feelings with the 25th anniversary of 9/11. We all felt differently. Omar wanting to reflect, Ally thinking the coverage was too depressing, and Johnny feeling unaffected as he's too young to remember the tragic event. Regardless, the day felt heavy and no feeling is wrong, except Johnny's. Former KTLA reporter Ellina Abovian returned to the studio today to break down the new Best Of LA issue of LA Magazine, which somehow we were featured in. We also presented her with our custom-made WORST of LA list, which she weighed in on and curated for final approval. Worst parking lot went to Trader Joe's! Are you prepared for the end of days? We aren't, which is why we did an AMA with a Doomsday Prepper. What's the first skill we should learn to survive the apocalypse? How many cans of soup should we stash in our garage? What happens when we run out of toilet paper? We asked every question, dumb or otherwise, and didn't take notes on the answers. Plus, Vanessa has been forced to be a Rams fan as part of our Forced Fandom this NFL season and now she knows what it's like to be a disappointed fan after their dismal showing in Australia. Who's house?!

We'll get into an episode of Klein Alley Show in just a moment, but in the meantime, let's tell you about our absolute favorite place on the planet. Yep, that would be San Bernardino International Airport, where you can go through the airport process without waiting in long lines and overpaying for parking. Quick connections to the Bay Area and the world, plus ski and snowboard in Provo from San Bernardino all winter long. Every other airport, you're going to be in long TSA lines, you're going to be miserable, you're going to say, oh, I got to get there two, three hours before my flight.

Not at San Bernardino International Airport. And now we send you on a direct flight into our podcast, which starts right now. Hey, what's going on, Clown and Allie? Are you ready? I love Clown and Allie, you little bitch. Clown and Allie, it's just okay. Just don't let Frank's body into that. Good morning, everybody.

Hey, what up, Clown and Allie? Whoa, sweet divot steak, did you see that? Meet the Clown and Allie show. Let's get the show started. The show started. The show started. We are live in Los Angeles. Three, two, one.

And here we go. Let's just let the guy sniff butts. Who's your daddy? are you ready for the weekend are you ready for the weekend are you ready for the weekend monday tuesday wednesday trash thursday friday forget about that sunday sleeping at eatin brunch saw a couple of cute boys and a hot little girl it was a real all-you-can-eat boyfay it sucks Woo, woo, woo, woo!

Allie is the F-word. Hit the beach or hit the mall. Go out with friends, do nothing at all. Sleep in, watch movies, read books. Anything goes, just take a look. Woo-hoo. Are you ready for the weekend? She's a hit.

Are you ready for the rear end? Go. Go take a look at the... Yeah. Are you ready for the rear end? Woo. Are you ready for the weekend? Yeah.

Are you ready for the rear end? Go. Are you ready for the weekend? Yeah. Oh, that was so good. This is my baby. It's Klein Outro. Low 6.7.

KROQ FM and HD Pasadena. Los Angeles. Orange County. The Sonic Pulse of Los Angeles. This is the world famous KROQ. Hey, Sonic! Standing ovation for the audio sniper, huh? That was incredible work.

DJ Omar Khan, your finest yet, I believe. I think the text line will agree. Taking that weekend song and making it new every single week. And, God damn, that drop of Ally talking about the boyfay. Oh, man. I didn't think I would ever hear that again. That is my new favorite. If we could, just for anyone who was not paying attention,

I mean, I think it's very important that you understand how Ally really feels about life. And this sums her up. If someone said, sum up Ally. You've worked together for a long time. Sum her up in one phrase. This would be the new phrase. A couple of cute boys and a hot little girl. It was a real all-you-can-eat buffet.

You know, it's ironic that I don't love boys, and I don't really like buffets that much either. Sure sound like you do. In that clip, let me guess, that was out of context? It was out of context. It was what the Wheel of Fortune guy was doing on the plane. Good morning. Welcome to your weekend.

It's Friday. It's K-Rock with your Klein Alley Show. Fighting something. Who else is sick or fighting something? I'm losing the fight, I think. Allie blamed me for getting her sick, and now I'm convinced that she started getting me sick. But then Johnny and Vanessa all had the sniffles last week. I think it could have come from any of us.

Jake said he was fighting something. I was at, one of the last times I was at a restaurant, the hostess that sat us had a horrible cold and was coughing into the menus that she then handed us. Oh, that's a move. And then we almost left. We were like, yikes, this seems like a bad idea. Why is she here at work? And then she proceeded to serve us coffee and pancakes.

and then we thought, hey, in three to five days, I think this will hit us. So I don't know if it's from that. I don't know if it's from Vanessa and her back-to-school. Yeah, Vanessa got that back-to-school thing. She got it all. Lice, pinworms, cold. She got everything. But then I started to think about it. You know who I blame? A.C.

I blame A.C. Who's that? The A.C. Oh, air conditioning. Air conditioning. Oh, my God. I thought you know English. I thought she was talking about Arizona. Oh, A.C.? I thought she was talking about A.C. Slater. Well, yeah, listen, I don't know what's going on,

but a lot of people got something right now. So here we are fighting through it together. It'll make it worth your while today. At least we'll try to. Actually, we will make it worth your while today because one of our absolute favorite guests will be stopping into the K-Rock studio so we can infect her with our germs.

Alina Abovian, former KTLA reporter and now friend of the show, will be coming in. And every time she comes in here, our social media numbers seem to skyrocket. I don't know why that is, Allie. I think she's easy to look at or something. She's an all-you-can-eat boyfay. That's what Allie does say about her every time she comes in here.

So that'll be later this morning. We've got that to look forward to. Some Johnny Doesn't Know on a Friday. And the Box of Shame will rear its ugly head, plus tickets for you to go to Not Scary Farm opening night. And, of course, $500 of Allie's money on a $500 Friday. A lot of people on the text line are saying that they have COVID now. Is that around? Is that still here?

You know, it's funny. At my kid's school, they said a lot of people are getting COVID. The COVID's going. I'm like, how do we even know we have COVID anymore? Is everyone still testing? I bet one of us has it. I don't really care, but I bet one of us has it. That's what the new conversation is, though.

I probably have COVID, but am I going to check? No. Who has a test? And if they do have a test, it's super expired. Yeah, I've got one of those expired ones that they used to send out. From like three years ago. Well, anyway, regardless, we're together, so let's make the most of it. Make it worth your while.

And if you need us, the phones are open. The text line is open. 800-520-1067 or 323-TIP-BOLI with an I if you nasty. Lots to get into this morning on KROQ. Some things we're definitely

going to regret because we'll be going through all of our Google search histories. Which reveals a lot about a person. It really does. And I think we will humiliate ourselves, which seems to be a theme

around these parts, for your listening pleasure. And that will be coming up on KROQ. KROQ, the Arts Line Alley Show. Very aware of the anniversary that is today, 25 years ago. September 11th happened.

And I know for Johnny, it's nothing more than a punchline because he did not really know about 9-11 because he was born, I think, like it was a baby when that went on. But for the rest of us, I was in college when that went on. And all of us obviously had a pretty impactful day, even thinking back about it. And this year, because it is one of those special anniversaries, 25 years, it does feel like it's getting a ton of coverage. I'm actually surprised, Allie, that you are doing something that a lot of people would not do on September 11th. I know. And I didn't even realize that it was happening until I checked in yesterday. And I was like, oh, I'm flying on 9-11. And then I got to the point where it said, do you want to check bags?

Do you want to look at your seat assignment and pick a new seat? And I looked at the flight map, so many open seats. And I was wondering, do a lot of people still, after 25 years, decide they don't want to fly on 9-11? My wife was supposed to fly back today. She's away for business, and she purposely pushed it another day. So she's one of those people who just says, I'm not going to do it? Yeah, she's like, I'm not going to do it. Now, I know you're going to say, well, that's the stupidest thing ever because there's been a million people that have flown on 9-11 since the 9-11 and without incident.

So I do know that, like, for— But it's in your mind, and if it's going to make you nervous and you can fly a different day, then why not? Both of my daughters, when we found out, you know, when you go in and the guy says, yeah, you're pregnant, and they do that little mathematical formula, both due dates were September 11th for both of them. Wow. Wow. That's tough to even get a same-due date, let alone a same-due date that's a horribly depressing day. I'm a Thanksgiving effer. I like to eff during Thanksgiving. So when you eff during Thanksgiving because the tryptophan is my friend, then that's what happens. You have a 9-11 date.

I don't know how you do it after a big giant turkey dinner. The point is that that was something that we didn't want for obvious reasons. Because you just go, that's a terrible day to make a celebratory day for a birthday when it's also a day when you're commemorating all of these people that lost their lives during this terrorist attack. And so it is a weird. Even I remember people didn't do concerts. People didn't do content. They didn't have games. There was nothing taking place on 9-11 because no one wanted to say, hey, come to my show.

It's on 9-11. Then it kind of slowly started returning back to normal. And then with this 25th anniversary, it kind of feels like it's all hitting fresh again. And just when you thought, you know, never forget, here we are now all these years later. And Dane Cook is performing at Yamaha tonight. So it's like. So everything is as usual. 9-11 all over again.

No, no, Dane Cook. Dane Cook. Very different. White guy. Yeah, very different. So anyway, I'm sure we'll do a more proper mention and tribute a little bit later in the show. Will we, though? No, we won't.

We'll try to say something. I know that a lot of people are already requesting. You know, I think Kevin Ryder has put together, I remember listening to it on KROQ, you know, years ago. He put together a very impassioned, heartfelt, I mean, really unbelievable, goosebump-tier-inducing tribute that would air every single year. And I'm sure he'll probably play it. I would imagine he's going to play it this afternoon because he's on K-Rock again. Should we blow it for him and just play it now? Yeah, let's spoil it.

Steal his moment. Steal his big moment that he spent a lot of time to put together. So anyway, I'm sure at some point we will try to pay respects and tribute. It's tough, though, because I see I've been looking at the news this morning and everything is OK. Now's the moment the tower hit or the plane hit the tower. Now this moment, the second tower. And then they're playing phone calls of people calling their loved ones or looking for them. And and I understand that it's important for us to remember what happened, especially for people like Johnny, who had no idea.

You know, they live in a post 9-11 world where they don't really know what happened before. The New York skyline was never different to that. Right. And Johnny's just an idiot. Yeah, but you can't. Johnny learned about it on SpongeBob. You know, if you didn't live through it, though, if you don't remember the moment you got the news, it's like, you know, when we were kids, you know, they were like, oh, Pearl Harbor. And we're like, yeah, that sounds like it sucked.

But we have no idea what it was actually like to get the news and to see that happen. Pearl Harbor was always my punchline. Now his is 9-11. It passes down. I appreciate all the coverage, by the way. I like the way it makes me feel. Oh, yeah. Oh, I hate the way it makes me feel.

This is so sad. You know, it is sad, but I think we need to realize, you know, the effect and the change that it had on us. But we do realize it. No, I don't think a lot of people do. No, no, no, no, it fades away. I think Omar's right, but the problem is that I don't know if someone that was not alive or old enough to comprehend what was happening when it happened. Because I think Omar's right. As we see this coverage, we get right back to the feels we had morning of.

And that was so just life-altering, mind-altering. A helpless feeling of shock and sadness, but also fear. I mean, it was a universally healthier. And the reality is that a lot of people that did not experience that day up, I don't know if that translates. And I think your analogy to Pearl Harbor is absolutely right because I saw black and white footage of things that happened in Pearl Harbor. And you're like, well, that looks like it sucks.

Sucks for history. Right, exactly. I will say to your point, client, as somebody who didn't experience it, because I was only like two or three years old when it actually happened, seeing all the documentaries growing up in school that our teachers made us watch, like I felt heavy as a little like fourth grader

and I was like you were heavy weren't you a fat kid no I didn't get fat until like seventh grade thank you thank you when I truly started

to realize the impact of 9-11 I started eating my feelings but I'll be serious it was really scary like and I was like damn like I can't believe

something like that happened and if something like that happened today like it's I can't even like describe it like it's

it's insane that's not funny Well, I know there are a lot of teachers that would say, oh, you know, some people skip over this, but I make a point to make it a big thing every single year to make sure people know, you know, what the impact really was. I'll be honest. For people that didn't live through it.

Both of my kids asked me yesterday. They're like, do you know what tomorrow is? I'm like, Friday, bitches. And they're like, no, no, no. You called them bitches? Yeah, that's what I did. Whoa. Hey, I'll sleep by you.

I thought they were trying to hype me up for the weekend. I was all excited. And they said, it's 9-11. Do you know what that is? And I had that moment where I was like, do I turn this into like a real teaching moment and freak them the F out? Why would you freak them out? So I just said I'd never heard of it. Moving on.

Moving on. I'm interested in what they said. They said that, you know, they're going to talk about it in school. And I don't know what the appropriate, you know, way that it's talked about at school is. But it's, okay, there's a benefit because every person and every American should know what happened. But also when you're a little kid, doesn't that instill a lot of fear in you? Like, hey, there was some crazy-ass people who hijacked a plane and flew it into a giant building and killed thousands of people. Anyway, lunch.

They also have, you know, shooter drills at school. So, I mean, that fear is already there. Yeah, I'm desensitized to that. We used to have, like, active shooter school drills and stuff. But sadly, the saddest part about the shooter drills that they do now is that, and this is an uplifting way to start the Friday show, Friday bitches, is that they don't tell them. They tell us they're doing a shooter drill, but they tell them it's like a big game of hide and seek or something, which is like adorable, but also like it's terrible.

So they don't tell them what it really is until maybe they're older? They just don't tell them we're doing a shooter drill. They say, we're going to play the quiet game now, and we're going to test this out, and and then they basically all have to be really quiet and, you know, lay down or whatever. But that's what's happening because they tell us in an email, this is what we did today if your kids bring it up.

Yeah, when I was in eighth grade for Sandy Hook, they told us, like, all right, everybody go find a spot to hide in. And you were so fat by then that that would have been really hard for you. I was five and six. They're all like, block the door, fat kid. Oh, my God.

Five questions, $500. It's a $500 Friday, something that we forced Allie to start doing. She doesn't like it, but she didn't say no. Well, she tried to say no. We said, we don't hear you. So, anyway. No does not mean no around here.

That's right. It's a great quote. Remember that. Put that on a pillow. Put that right on your couch. We'll get into the game in a moment, and hopefully you win Ali's money. A message on the go line. I believe this one's for Omar.

Hey, yo. Hey, yo. Hey, yo. Go, Redskins. Omar's a big fan now of the Washington Commanders. Hell, yeah. What are you talking about? Redskins, dude.

Throwback, baby. Omar's throwback. For sure. Throwback. You know, I'm going to learn how to, you know, since it's so hot, I'm going to learn how to rain dance. Great. Maybe you'll bring some winds.

Yeah, I hope you do because no one loves their garden more than you, so that would be amazing if you could make that happen. I want to see that video of you doing that rain dance to that guy's song. I would love that. Perfect. A Tony in Fountain Valley, good morning and welcome to your weekend. Hi. Good morning.

It's Friday, bitches. That's what I told my kids. Let's get into these five questions, all about things in the news. If you do better than Allie, she will have to be forced to pay you $500. She's leaving right now. She's out of here. Allie's getting wider by the day. That's how pregnancy is supposed to work.

But, man, it has taken its toll. And here we go. Tony, let's go. Allie knows the news. Jack in the Box is collabing with this animated family for a very special Halloween-themed munchie meal. The Simpsons. Question number two. Like the speed with which you answered.

Question two now. The Spider-Man director that, of course, has broken all sorts of records by that amazing box office return on the new Spider-Man movie is now looking to turn this classic TV show into a movie for his next project. Let's go. Need an answer. Three, two. The Hulk.

The Hulk. Good guess. Question three. New study claims that drinking this will triple your chances of developing throat cancer. Drinking what? Sparkling wine. Sparkling wine. God, I hope not.

We go to question number four. this fast food restaurant is going to have its own golf tournament in Orange County uh Wendy's Wendy's

and finally question number five only two NFL teams have wins this season name both teams uh you got the 49ers and then you got

Seattle Seahawks all right thank you thank you for that Let's bring Allie back in, and we shall score it together. See how you did. You were definitely in the running for this $500, and I believe it was last week that Allie was forced to pay the people.

So I would look forward very much to her having to pay someone again. That would be so great if she lost a grand over the course of two weeks here on KROQ. We go to question number one, Allie. Jack in the Box is collabing with this animated family for a special Halloween-themed munchie meal. Animated family. The Simpsons? Oh, wow.

Was that a guess? Yeah. I don't know. Uh-huh. There's a lot of animated families. Bob's Burgers would make sense, right? Oh, yeah. Family guy.

But you went with The Simpsons. He also went with The Simpsons. Correct answer. Treehouse of Horror. Treehouse of Terror. Oh, nice. Simpsons. Wow.

I was right. Munchie Meal will be coming through Jack in the Box. We go to question number two. Tied up 1-1. We go to question two. The director of the highly acclaimed Spider-Man movie that just won't go, just won't die. Can't kill Spider-Man. Spiders we kill all the time.

All the time. But Spider-Man just lives on. Is now looking to revive this classic TV show for his next movie project. Wow. He wants to direct what? A version of what? All in the Family. Really?

Well, terrible guess. Hey, I don't know. 500 Friday? He said The Hulk. The correct answer is Hawaii Five-O. Oh. Wants to go Hawaii Five-O. I thought we already revamped Hawaii Five-O.

I think we did it as a TV show again. But I think this guy wants to make it. And I think it has been a movie, but he wants to make it a better movie. We've got a question number three. It's tied up 1-1. I don't know if you could polish that turd. Drinking what will triple your chances of developing throat cancer? A new study that came out today.

I think I did see this. I think it is hot, very hot beverages. All right. He said sparkling wine. But the correct answer is very slash extremely hot beverages. Which it sucks for people who want like center of the sun hot coffee. There are some people, they're not happy unless it is actually bubbling, boiling. But it's not good for your throat, and apparently it is developing throat cancer.

I looked at a lot of people who come up with this study, so it's interesting. If you're one of these people that needs your drink super hot. I like it so hot that it's barely burning my mouth. Go to question number four. Allie's up by one right now with two questions left. This fast food restaurant is now going to be having its own golf tournament in the Orange County. Jeez. let's go with

Chick-fil-A he said Wendy's you guys aren't thinking big enough Taco Bell Taco Bell oh man

Taco Bell's having their own golf tournament in Orange County and finally Allie up one last question only two NFL teams

currently have a win this season name both teams that would be the Seattle Seahawks and the San Francisco 49ers

Allie used to be a fan of that team but now she's a Cardinals fans. And if I was a fan of the Niners, yesterday would have been a great game

for me. Would have been for you, but you can't enjoy it. Tony, sadly, at the end of everything, you lost by one and what must you shamefully admit

over the airwaves of K-Rock? Yo, this is Tony from Fountain Valley and Allie knows the news. Tony, here's the good news for you. The call is over.

That's the only good news I have right now. But you have a chance to win again on Monday morning around this time. Some of Allie's cash. And we will continue

on with the show after your Deftones on KROQ. It is the weekend, so we've got that going for us. KROQ, we are flying out of the show. Live for the interaction at 800-520-1067. There's also that GOAT line there, 844-956-GOAT. Hey, Allie, just

got a call. I'm on my way on to work right now. Photo accomplishment, $200,000. Whoa! Wow. That $200,000. It is exciting. You've got to take a screenshot, send it to me. And I will always repost your Otoe accomplishments, especially not only all zeros, but 200,000, a major mile marker.

That means you took care of your car. You got your oil changes. Okay. You did everything that you needed to do. That was all you, my friend. Congrats. Someone has come up with maybe the stupidest idea yet, but I feel like you're going to love this. Hey, you sloggers.

Do you suffer from Otoe FOMO? will fear no more of missing that next Odo accomplishment by the new OdoCam from Allie Johnson. Yeah. So you can get back to doing important things while you drive, like self-pleasuring yourself on the 101. So if you're too busy self-pleasuring on the 101 like Allie does, that you miss your Odo accomplishments,

it'll be a camera that just monitors your Odo, so you never miss a moment. These dash cams, they're facing the wrong way. They've got to be facing the Odo. It's supposed to be, yeah. You think it's cool to be facing the traffic, and, oh, I saw this accident happen, now I know who's at fault. No, you've got to have that camera right on your dash to make sure that it is on your speed limit and your ODO.

We have said before that getting broken up with sucks. Getting dumped is not a good feeling. We've all been broken up with before. Sometimes you see it coming. Sometimes you're shocked. You're blindsided. I thought things were going well. What are you talking about?

It's a not you, it's me situation. My wife got dumped. By? By not me. I haven't done that yet. It's on my to-do list. Okay. She got dumped by a friend.

A longtime friend that she's been friends with since she was five years old. I think a lot of people listening right now would, if they think about their group of friends, there's probably a friend in their group that they would love to officially kind of part ways with. Yeah, but wouldn't you think that after, you know, since you've been friends for 30 plus years, that you are grandfathered in, like you're not allowed to just exit that friendship at that point? that's the thing that holds you though and then you go we don't really have that much in common we don't really like seeing each other we don't actually like to do things but we do have that 30 year connection and it's like family where you're like you're my family i can't cut you out

but you can that's the that's the one benefit of not being family family is hard to cut out friends you can cut out but you you know the longer you know the person i mean i get in the same argument my wife a lot too there's people and she's like i know but we i've known her since we were in third grade i'm like yeah but so what does that mean she sucks sucks well there's a friend of mine that i was friends with since college and she just ghosted after like 20 years of friendship i don't know what happened i still have no closure on like what happened there but it is nice to get a breakup text i guess rather than a breakup text she got a breakup text from the friend saying i've tried this is a two-way street i feel like i'm the one that's pulling

all the strings here to try and hang out i feel like at this point we should just cut our losses and call it just call it it's not a friendship anymore uh yeah a long text and then my wife wrote back a very long text and then that's it they have not spoken since then they don't plan to ever speak again and she's like hey we're done with this person i'm like oh okay we're done did you like this person or no i liked her fine sure you're out you can't hang with her anymore well it's not like i would plan to meet up with her without my wife there or anything like that but yesterday she texted me did you wish so and so a happy birthday it's her birthday today and i was like well no although the friend that cut you guys out friend that just broke up she was gonna send

her the generic happy birthday text she wanted she asked me if i did and i was like well why would i talk to this person you've been broken up with that means we have been broken up with and by proxy i'm no longer supposed to speak to this person right had you sent her a happy birthday text you would have probably gotten yelled at your wife would have said well i told you we're out well you should send her a text and i'm like well is that going to be awkward she's probably not going to respond to me i thought that this was a joint effort if you get broken up with and both of you have been broken up with why would i be the one keeping that relationship i didn't know her since kindergarten i agree that it is hard to find and i know the argument is if you're true

friends it's not about who did what this and who did what that it just naturally falls into place you see each other you have a good time together and maybe you don't see each other for five years And then you end up in Vegas together. You're like, oh, man, this is the greatest hangover. I love this person. Yeah. But the reality is life gets in the way. Maybe you have kids, whatever.

Well, and our lives completely change. Like, she's still single, no kids, lives a very different lifestyle than we do. And now I think that we've just kind of parted ways lifestyle-wise, right? So then she feels that you have ignored her, snubbed her, not invited her to stuff, whatever. And she said, I want out. I'm out. I'm done. To make it official is a strange thing.

most people would just quietly let it go off into the night yeah let it fizzle well but then you feel like you still have to breadcrumb or be like hey let's get together and you feel like you're trying and i do kind of appreciate the honesty of like i don't i'm not digging this friendship anymore so why don't we just cut our losses and be done with it because then now this you know my wife and both of us don't have to quote waste our energy not that i thought it was a waste of time but it's like oh if this person doesn't want to be my friend anymore anyway then i'm glad that We don't have to, you know, make an effort if she doesn't want us to do it. Especially if at one point you were, quote, best friends forever.

Because then you have to, like, declare this forever has now ended. And I'm pretty sure there are bracelets. Yeah, if you're BFFs and you have to say to the person. You have a half of a heart somewhere in a box. I'm going to need the half of your heart back or you're going to have to take mine back. We can't both wear these hearts. Every girl has to do an exchange. We're 35.

Why are we still wearing these half of hearts? I had so many of those, by the way. Those half hearts? I had BFF half-hearts from like 20 different people. Yeah, and now they can't even, no one wants to make decisions anymore. I've seen this, but they won't even sell just the half-hearts. They have the heart broken up into like five pieces, so everyone gets a little piece of it. Yeah, that's right.

Because they can't just have one. And then at a reunion, you're supposed to put it all back together again. So that's, yeah, a lot of people say this friend breakup thing is real, and there's not really, we all understand the concept of relationship breakups because we've been through them, but the friend breakup is a whole different, I would argue, much more. Complicated. Yeah, it's weird because you kind of don't need to do, nothing needs to be done. But if someone feels like they need closure on a relationship.

But a text is okay for a friend, right? Not okay for a lover? Probably want to do it in person? No, I would say, someone on the text line claims that they just went to the park with their best friend to break up with them of 20 years. Park is a good place because it's public. I took my ex-friend to the park to break up. Someone said they just got broken up with over a friendship during, oh, politics. I mean, there's different things that will break people up, right?

It's sad that that happens, but it's also common that you just decide after a certain amount of time, hey, I don't see eye-to-eye with this person anymore, and I don't really need to have them in my life. Well, Allie is down a friend now, so... I guess. Or am I? But I'm still supposed to wish her a happy birthday? She's down to three total. So now, if you're listening, she may need you as her friend. We have to take a... Send me a half a heart. I'll wear it.

A break. She's so desperate. She's got a bunch of half hearts. We'll be back after this quick one with your news, and then a brand new hour of the show with your tickets, and much more after this. Let's find out what's happening in the world together with the ADD News, then a brand new hour of the show will officially begin. We will get you into opening night at Not Scary Farm, and tickets to the Sand Sports Super Show at the OC, so we've got lots to look forward to. But first, there's this. Grab your Adderall. It's time for ADD News. Today, obviously, an emotional day for some people, depending on who you are, where you were, how old you are, etc. etc it's the 25th anniversary of 9-11 and if you check the news today it's a trigger alert you're

probably going to see a lot of very sad depressing but impactful 9-11 remembrance features they're interviewing firefighters that were there kids of the people who died in the attacks who are now all grown up and have families of their their own spouses of people who died people in la who were in new york near the towers when the tragedy happened you name it they are talking to them CNN is replaying some of the goodbye phone calls that people made to their loved ones when they knew they only had minutes left to live. This week in New York, they did a special ceremony for the 25th anniversary where they had 2,977 drone lights over the New York Harbor that recreated the towers.

They had the whole silhouette of both of the Twin Towers to remember them. The number of drones being the number of people who died in the attacks And, you know, there are some people who didn't know a world where you could, you know, could actually meet your family at the gate after the plane landed. You could actually carry fluids, full ass water bottles onto a plane before 9-11. There's a lot of before 9-11 and after 9-11 lifestyle changes that have happened. They bring you right up to the cockpit sometimes in the middle of the flight. I know. Hey, sit on the pilot's lap.

30,000 feet. So, for example, Johnny was young. He was only two or three years old when this happened. So he doesn't really remember the before 9-11 times. But then when Johnny grows up and has kids, he's going to have to explain COVID to them. Right. And how that was a tragedy and how a million people died when that happened. And to them, it's just going to be a cold, a common cold.

Yep. And it's not going to be a big deal. So all of these things that shaped who we are and that we think about and remember as horrible tragedies, you know, it is our job to kind of talk about it and pass it on through generations so that the impact is still there. And sadly, you know, there are still things to this day, not just the inconveniences about travel, but the feeling of, yeah, we feel safe for the most part, and then we don't feel safe. And just like that, it feels like in the blink of an eye, that can all be stripped from us. But I think we can all agree that all of these years later, the fact that we are now still forced to deal with Pete Davidson is a real problem, right? And that is one of those, sadly, that is one of those things that is probably a direct effect of 9-11. And I remember there were years where Pete Davidson was in the news and everywhere always.

And then you kind of, he went by the wayside and got kind of quiet. But then every single year, you're like, oh, yeah, Pete Davidson, he's annoying. We all know at this point that our devices are constantly listening to us. But now Apple is making it a little bit more obvious with a couple of new features. And these were announced as part of their big announcement, but it kind of fell through the cracks. So there's two things, Live Rewind and Siri Recap. Live Rewind is basically a way to rewind the world around you. So it will be listening through your phone or your watch.

And if you forget something or if you can't remember what somebody just said, you can rewind the previous 15 seconds of a conversation and it will text it to you and it'll snip it. Why don't I just say, what did you just say? Omar, you think that's stupid? I think this is the greatest advancement ever. Like if someone says their name and you're like, I've instantly forgotten. And then you're going to be like, hold on real quick. Let me check with my phone.

Hey, Harry. Let me give you a real life scenario. Sure. I'm on the couch. My wife is blah, blah, blah. That's something. And you even listen to me? Of course I'm listening to you.

What did I just say? Cha-ching. But it's so obvious that you're checking your phone and you're using that thing. She just said cha-ching. No, no. She didn't say cha-ching. That's my brain going cha-ching. I know what you just said.

And then I say, Siri, tell me what my wife just said 15 seconds ago. And then it says, you didn't do whatever, blah, blah, blah. You think Siri is also going, she said, blah, blah, blah, not important. Yeah, probably. If it's smart enough. For me, I think this is useless. So Siri Recap is the other feature, and that will quietly take notes during your conversation and then use AI to recreate concise summaries when you want to refer to it later.

And this is going on nonstop for that one? Yeah. So then the problem is, it's already recording us, but now it's recording and taking notes on us so that it can then present our lives to us so that we can remember it, which will then make our memories even worse, I'm sure, because I'll think to myself, I don't

have to remember this. Siri will tell me later. I guess I'll just completely check out. But this is supposed to be designed to help us, quote, stay focused on the moment. But think about that. If you have to sit through some boring college lecture or whatever, you don't have to pay attention to there anymore. Well, they already have that. Like

transcribing apps. Okay, so we could use that with our boring meetings here now, and we get called into the boss who wants to go over graphs and charts with us, we can just go ahead and tune out. I mean, we tune out anyway. Yeah, but this is part of the struggle of human life, trying to pay attention when we don't want to. Right. Challenging ourselves to go, God, this is

boring, but I have to figure out how to make it exciting. You know when Allie tells us all of her musical theater college stories, and we're all like, oh, man, let this end. Now Siri has to listen to it. Yeah, poor Siri. Poor Siri. There's things we want to forget, man. I know. Never forget my musical theater history. I think we need to

text the stories back to Allie so she can reread how boring they were herself. Do you see? Stop it. Do you see what you did to us? You know what this would be nice for, though, is servers who would take your order and then they go back in the kitchen

and they go, God, I didn't write any of that down. I don't remember. Oh, he wanted a Cobb salad with no bacon. Oh, he wanted his bread scooped like a loser. When I was a waiter at a place, they wouldn't let us write down the orders because they wanted to be all fancy.

And I had the worst memory because of all the weed. And I said, this is impossible. If I hit a table more than two people, I was cooked. I had no chance. When I'm at a restaurant,

I see the person not writing it down. And I'm like, you need to write this down. We're not at this level anymore as humans. Not too many modifications. When I was a waiter, I could remember to order up to about 15 people. What? Yeah, I could see that. Omar's got that kind of brain.

Yeah. But Omar was also serving. I mean, he was working at Denny's, let's be honest. Yeah, it was Denny's. Grand Slam, Grand Slam, Grand Slam, Grand Slam. Hold the bacon. Okay, gotcha. Yeah, and in fact, if you have an old-ass Tesla, you could get some money from a class action settlement.

And this is not like a 15-cent check like a lot of the class action lawsuits. You can get as much as $350, and this is from Tesla. Anybody who bought a Tesla before 2016 had free supercharging built into their car. Pretty sweet perk now, 10 years later, but they were charging people these idle fees when they were supercharging. So if your thing was charged and you left your car there, they were charging people for that that shouldn't have been charged. So now if you have an old Tesla, you can submit this claim, and you can get actually hundreds of dollars from that. This is weird. I actually qualify for this.

Oh, Allie wants that money. Yeah, that's him. Get that sweet Tesla money right there. We're getting to a brand new hour of the show in moments. And we got a lot to look forward to this hour. Is this our doomsday prepper hour, Vanessa? Yes, confirm, confirm. Nice.

Okay, so this is exciting now because we just heard about how AI is apparently going to attack us, take over. And we have about 10 years left of humanity. And so we're going to talk to a doomsday prepper to figure out what we need to be doing right now so that we are safe. And then we will give you some tickets, I'm sure, on KROQ. This is the world famous KROQ. I've got it, Friday! Welcome to your weekend and good morning. It's KROQ, we're your Klein Alley Show.

If you need us, phone us, text line 800-520-1067 or 323-TIP-BOLY with an I if you're nasty. My name is Klein. That is Alley. Good morning. DJ Omar Khan, the audio sniper. Jake the Nerd. What's that? Over there.

Jake's all feeling left out because last night we all went to the Bleacher Show at the Troubadour. Great show. Jack Antonoff invited us to come out when we had him in the studio to announce those shows and he probably didn't think we'd take him up on it. It was probably one of those LA invites. Yeah, we should do lunch sometime. And you go, yeah, and then you never do it. But then there we were.

There we were. We all went. Jake didn't go, but I didn't know because you go to so many shows. I think last year Jake said he went to close to 100 shows or something. Yeah, I kind of figured that if it was happening you would just know about it and go, Jake. Yeah, no one invited me.

There was an invite. There was an open invite to anyone who wanted to go on the wine show. And no one told me. We were in the office a few times and talking about it. And I was doing the podcast. And we said, is Jake here? Good.

Who wants to go to the show? Would you have gone, Jake? Yeah, you all went. I would have gone. Oh. Just because we went or because you wanted to go? Oh, because you went.

I wanted to know you. Oh. Well, it was a good time. Too bad. Oh, shoot. It was great. The place smelled nice, too. I want to stink it up.

Yeah, I know. Troubadour's a small space, dude. Yeah, I can stink it up real good. I bet you could have. They really make a lot of effort to make sure that place stays clean. They were checking everyone's mouths for gum. I kind of forget all the rules there. That was crazy.

The guy made the bouncer on the way in made me spit out my gum. And I said. I was like, let me see your mouth. I said, but I've got a pocket full of drugs. He goes, that's cool. But you cannot have this gum in here. Things that injure people like gum need to go in the trash. So the gum, they made me spit out my gum.

And then I had to do a mouth check. It was the weirdest thing ever. And, of course, Klein's responsible for one of the most awkward moments we've ever had. First of all, you're making this seem like it was a big deal. It was weird. It was not weird at all. Very weird, actually. Johnny was there.

I tried running away quickly and exiting the dressing room because I was like, all right, I'm out. Guys, you make it sound like I'm some weirdo that walks around with, like, Asperger's and says dumb things, but I'm not. You were our Jake of the night. I was not. What I did was a totally normal... You jaked it. No, I did not jake it. I swear to you, I did not jake it.

Jake is so bad. What I did was the most normal thing anyone would have done. Oh, that is. Are you kidding me? That's the most normal thing? We were put in an awkward situation, and I made it less awkward. No, you made a normal situation extremely awkward. We have a good relationship with Jack Antonoff.

We've had good conversations with him. He actually remembers us and says hi, which is not normal. He actually said at one point, he's like, I think I want to come on and just be a regular on the morning show. He wanted to come do a show over time with us. Right, right. I know. So whatever.

So we go on and we do this announcement. And it's weird because it's not like the band's coming right out afterwards. We're just getting people hyped up. We do it. We talk. We go off stage. And Jack says, hey, what's up? He goes out of his way to say hi to us.

He gives us a little elbow hello. He's backstage at this point? This is backstage. Okay. We go, Jack, hey, what's up? He happens to not have a shirt on. He's just in boxer shorts, basically. He's just in his underwear.

Oh, is he ripped? What's he look like? Medium build, kind of like, yeah, he's medium build. Of course, John was checking him out. Jesus, apparently I was the only one not perving out on Jack Antone. I didn't perv out at all. Well, I'm just curious. And Klein goes, ah, Ali, he's shirtless.

I bet your wife is pretty jealous of you right now that you get to look at this. Yeah, that's right. And then he kind of looked at me, and I was like, yeah, I guess I'll just take a mental picture. And then he looks at me like, okay. Yeah, that's the weird, that's the, yeah, that's, by the way, you're the one who. And then we just kept walking. You're the one who said the Jake thing, not me. You made it way worse.

Yeah, you made it worse. I'll just take a mental picture. You said something about, hey, I bet your wife's jealous. You're looking at his naked body right now. You might want to take a picture. And I'm like, I guess I'll just take it mentally. Jack, can you wink at him, too? And then he just kind of stopped talking.

To be fair, we walked through his dressing room, though. I know. Well, you have to in that venue. And Allie made a camera noise, a ka-chick, like she was taking a picture. And to be honest So weird I don't think he knew at that moment Because he was trying to get into a bathroom to change

And he happened to be stuck outside the door And he was in his underwear And we just happened to be walking by at that moment Why do you even acknowledge that he's in his underwear? That was the weird part You don't think he knows he's in his underwear? Of course he knows, we all know Why can't we just move on?

I don't want to be like, hey, you're in your underwear And I'm seeing you half naked right now He did that thing where he kind of tried to cover himself a little bit because he wasn't expecting we'd walk by at that moment and that's when we walked by and you, of course, needed to go like,

hi. Hi, Jack. He came up and said hi to us. Whatever. He had nowhere to go. He was just standing there. Yeah, he was stuck in a corner and then I just said,

oh, man, your wife would be jealous of this. Try to make the guy feel good and then you said, I'll stop and take a mental picture. You're the weirdo, not me. Johnny, you saw it happen. Who was weirder?

Uh, I mean, what Klein said was very weird and that's when I started to walk away. Right. It was funny and John Antonoff has a good sense of humor.

Jack. Or whatever. John has to be the better one. Oh, you jaked it too, Omar. This long-lost brother. You jaked it. Omar, you jaked him. You jaked it.

Sign me up. Shake hands about that. Everyone who was at the Troubadour hopefully had a good time watching some Bleachers. We have clickbait to get to and then a doomsday prepper to save our lives next.

KROG, we are a Klein Alley show. We have some clickbait to get into quickly and then a doomsday prepper. An AMA was someone that was preparing for what could happen with AI. We were just told this week

we have a decade or less before AI destroys humanity. so you want to go ahead and make sure you're ready to go so we will talk to this doomsday prepper about all the things we should be doing right now and that'll be coming up just after this quick round of clickbait. Here we go. Alright, this is the one thing

that you are probably doing while walking your dog that is driving your dog absolutely nuts and you should stop doing it because you're giving your dog a complex. Now, Allie, I know you're not a dog person, but you were a dog walker. I was, yeah, for a few years. You've walked quite a few dogs.

I think that's another job you have to have if you're a lesbian at one point in your life. I was grandmothered into it. Right, because your lesbian aunt was also, right, other lesbians find, it's like Scientology for lesbians. They have to go recruit more lesbians to walk the dogs. So, Allie was a dog walker, and there's something that we are probably doing, that you are probably doing, and Omar's a dog guy, even though he hates his dog, and I'm a dog guy. Jake's a dog guy, although Jake's never actually walked his dog because his dog's feet have never touched the ground. She's a princess.

So I know the answer is probably carrying your dog in a backpack. And not letting them walk. Not letting them walk is probably the thing that's driving you nuts. But, Allie, what do you think it is? It's got to be urging your dog to pee or poop. Like pulling them? Pressuring them. A lot of pressure.

Pulling them over to that bush? Come on. Yeah, well, over here. Come on. Keep circling. Go, go, go, go, go. No one likes to be told when to poop. They want their time.

They're going to do it. Just give them a minute. Let them sniff around. Let them do it on their own time. Man, some dogs, though, it takes like half an hour. You got to get one out. And then they get a scent, and they start to go into the position. They start to do the circle, and then like a leaf blows by.

And they'll start over. They get distracted and move on. Like, God, you're going to be kidding me. No, come on. This took so long. Omar, what's the answer? I think your dog's going to get some sort of complex if you walk ahead of the dog while you're walking the dog. because they're going to feel like you're rushing them or whatever.

So don't step and don't walk in front of the dog when the dog leads you. Because I literally sometimes have to drag my dumb dog. It's just such a dummy. She doesn't walk? Yeah, I have to come and like tug, tug, tug, and then my kids get all upset. What are you doing? I'm like, the dog's fine. I love it when I see someone walking their dog and the dog just lays down.

That's the best. They're like, nope. Yeah, especially with that heat we've had. Yeah, I spent $350 on a vet bill, by the way, by that dog. He had some sort of urinary tract infection. Oh. Wow, he's got a UTI? That's the hottest thing to get.

Cranberry juice in the bowl, dude. She's slaying. All right, Jake, what's the answer? You have a dog? I do have a dog. I'm going to guess that it is, like, hovering over the dog. That makes it nervous. I mean, if that's really what you think, why do you do that constantly to your own dog?

I don't hover. You are literally attached to her 99% of the time. She's in the backpack. She's usually in the back. That's not hovering. Didn't she get a matching tattoo because she got a weird neutering scar and you got the matching scar and there's a tattoo on you? Yeah, matching tattoo, dude. We're tat homies.

Yeah, that's not hovering. Tat bros. The answer is no one's right. But if you are on your phone scrolling, and most people now are walking their dogs on their phone. I don't really see anyone who's not. Oh, really? Yeah. Everyone is just walking their dog on their phone?

Yeah. Yes. Oh, I see people just walking them normally. You do? Yeah, all the time. Well, apparently if you walk on your phone, scrolling, talking, listening to music, instead of focusing your attention on your dog, the dogs can feel this and they notice it. And all they want is your attention.

Wow, so it's like being around a kid where they know that you're distracted. They know you're not present. That's interesting. And I'm convinced my dog is sniffing piles of pee. He doesn't care what I'm doing. I feel like your dog at this point, if you weren't looking at your phone, would be like, what's wrong with him? But our dog does hate the remote control because he eats all the remote controls and he'll take them and hide them. Because they're a distraction.

And I think he knows if the remote's out, that means that he's not getting attention when he's going to watch shows. Same reason my cat sits right on top of my laptop. I think they're just like, I don't want you to be looking at this. I want you to be looking at me. Yeah, my dog's taken my hand away from my phone before. Jake's actually bringing the remote to Jake. Please, do something else. Jake, now bring that gun to me.

One bullet. one gun please jake please uh there you have it there's your clickbait come back in a moment uh we will save your lives together with a doomsday prepper and an ama any question you've ever wanted to know from a doomsday prepper get them to us now at 805-201067 and we'll be right back after this on k-rock k-rock we are klein alley show used to be zombies and natural disasters were our biggest fear and then there was this uh recently earlier this week it doesn't get bigger are more direct than this quote ai could kill all humans according to a lead researcher at anthropic within the next decade so then everyone started thinking about oh man this is now a new

thing we have to be concerned about and we want to make sure that we are as prepared as humanly possible so we're going to say hello to will in just a moment who's going to help us uh be prepared for an ama with someone that spends a lot of their life making sure that they are fully prepared for what potentially could happen and and this guy doesn't like the term prepper because i I think a lot of crazies go, like, oh, this is my crazy uncle. He's a prepper. He sits under his garage with a gun all the time waiting for end of days, and he just wants to be a prepared citizen and let us know what we should be doing as well,

especially because we've been hearing a lot of talk lately about how the big one is going to hit any day now in California. So prepper is a derogatory term? It's like the P word. Yeah, we don't say it, I think. We'll say hi to Will in a moment. But first, I just want to say good morning to Zeke. Zeke, you're on KROQ at 800-520-1067. Hello.

Hey, man, what's the deal? How's it going? Sweet gibbets. Top of the ham. I just want to let you know, you feel me? It's a real dog holiday today. You know why? Because, man, look, I'm turning 32 today.

It's my birthday, and I got some great news, man. I'm getting off parole early next year. I'll be a free man. They're going to take five years off my parole. You see what I'm saying? No. That's why I didn't know what you were saying. I think you're saying you're getting off parole early, and it's your birthday.

Is that correct? That's right. All right. Happy birthday, wheelchair. Beautiful. What a tribute. We met Zeke. Zeke, thanks, man.

Happy early parole, I guess. Hey, y'all stop holding me. All right. There he is. Aw, what a great day for you. That's Zeke. Good day. Let me say hi now to, oh, we got a lot of people on the phone with questions for our

prepared citizen. Yeah, there's a lot on this next line, too. Get them to us. 800-520-1067. You may know Will from his YouTube channel, where he helps get us all prepared for what could happen. Good morning, Will. Thank you for joining us on KROQ.

Good morning. Thank you so much for having me. I appreciate it. So, Ali, first question, you don't like the term prepper. Why is that? Well, because every time you hear the word prepper, you think of, like you said, some guy under the porch with a shotgun or, you know, wearing a tinfoil hat waiting for the super volcano to erupt in Yellowstone Park. And it's just, you know, when you say that term, people just kind of have an icky feeling about it. So that's why we go with a prepared citizen, because you don't have to be a weird person to be a prepared citizen.

Sorry, your tinfoil hat is interfering with the signal right now. I want to make sure we hear you clearly. You can't get good reception in your bunker. Hold on, hold on. I'm going to put you back on hold so Vanessa can try to figure out how you sound crystal clear. Because we must have good quality if you're going to share this information with us. And I'm going over. Ali, I've got, as I said, I've got my red backpack.

This is what my plan is. My trusty red backpack. I've got my red backpack. A survival. Full of whistles and ponchos and that tinfoil stuff to wrap your body in. You won't be able to fight anyone, but they'll know you're there because you've got a whistle. And then I've got a couple of old golf clubs as weapons, and that's kind of my plan. I have my kid's baseball bat.

That's a plan as well, I would imagine, of the show. I think, why would Walking Dead put, like, nails on it? Yeah. You know, kind of make a weapon. I would fashion a weapon, I think. So, Will, let's start with, if you have done nothing to prepare, what is the first thing that a person listening could do or should be doing right now to prepare for whatever it is?

Could be natural disaster, could be AI. Climate change. Could be zombie apocalypse. uh one of the one of the things that i recommend to people especially watch my channel is to get training um we like to use the term liquidate you know people spend a lot of money on this so we like to liquidate our time into skills and i am a big proponent of self-defense training i think that that's where every type of preparedness scenario really should start is learning how to protect what you have um jiu-jitsu karate or does it matter

Well, more along the lines, I mean, you guys are in California. I'm on the other side. Firearms training is generally the place where I like to start. I just bought a Groupon for a bunch of karate classes. What a waste of time that was. Don't do the Teemo karate. I'm going to break this board in half right now. That guy shoots me.

So you obviously have training for, do you have different training that you're going to use to fight different enemies? like, hey, here's what I'm going to do for robots versus here's what I'm going to do for zombies? Well, I'm not too worried about the robots, although Elon is, you know, he's got the, you know, they're coming out. But definitely more people are the biggest threat. You were mentioning The Walking Dead before, and if you watch that, they kind of stop focusing on the zombies after a while

and start focusing on the people. So that's definitely the biggest threat is people taking what you have. Right, you've got some... You don't want to steal your lot. Right, you've got canned chili sitting around there. or someone else wants your canned chili, and they'll kill you for it. Right. Right.

That's what we say on my channel. You want to, you know, start hoarding your beans, peas, and MREs because that's what most of the preppers do. They focus on food and water and not on, you know, people like me coming in and just taking everything that you have. You hear that, Jake? Beans are the big thing that's going to save us all. It's going to be like filet mignon.

That's right. Apocalypse beans. Doomsday beans. So say you're somebody like me who does not have any skills and does not have any firearms in their house. What is something that I can do? Should I just befriend somebody like you who has skills or what the hell am I going to do? Sexual favors.

Like if this happened right now or tomorrow, what the hell do I do? I mean, you really want to, you know, it's good to focus on, you know, learning a skill. And it can be any type of skill because, you know, if everything goes to, you know, hell in a handbasket, um you know you're going to join a group of people and you're going to need to have a skill so it's like prison that prison skill on the ready i'm good at things that don't matter i know does anyone need an australian accent right now or to put on an iphone screen i'm very good at putting on those screen protectors daniel uh you're on with our uh our prepared citizen will who has made this his mission for many years now uh what is your question well hey uh if you were

stuck and lost in an island and could only bring one item with you, what item would you bring? I don't think she's preparing for that situation because that's very unlikely. Did he say fleshlight? Fleshlight, that's the answer. I think he's right about that by the way. Fleshlight is the answer.

Because it is a flashlight and also a vagina. That's right. That's all you need. It's light and a vagina. 562 wanted to know what is the most valuable thing to have in an apocalypse? Is it firearms and guns is it gasoline or is it like medical supplies if you could only grab one what are you grabbing first i'm i'm i'm always going straight for the for the firearm for the guns

got it yeah uh look if it turns to cannibalism which happens eventually when we run out of food what is the best way to season human flesh yeah anything gordon ramsay says to do is what you do so salt pepper thyme uh you know a little bit of garlic all right do you think there's going to be a new currency in the apocalypse and if so what would it be because is it like pokemon cards is it ramen what are we going to be fighting over and trading uh batteries and ammunition that's everything batteries yeah yeah and then with say for example there's a big fire some kind of natural disaster that happens right now everyone's trying to get out of town do i get in a gas car or an electric car or does it depend because you know obviously if everyone's fighting over gas you

You don't want to be the person who's going to run out of gas. But then if you get an electric car and there's a power outage, you're screwed there, too. Well, yeah, but electric cars are just stupid. So, you know, just have a gas car. Gas car is the answer, Ali. He's judging you in your weird California ways. Yeah, but what if there's no gas but there is electricity? Well, there won't be.

Well, there might be. I don't know. I mean, but, you know, what do you want to do? Do you want to wait 37 hours for your car to charge to 20%? Or do you want to just hop in and turn the key and pick it up? Oliver, it shoots you for your chili. We're talking to Will right now. He's a prepared citizen.

He's on YouTube. Hundreds and thousands of people that have watched his prepared videos to get ready for what could be end of days. We heard recently this week AI could be the cause of it. We don't necessarily know. But you said that at the beginning you wasted a lot of time. You did what a lot of the, quote, preppers did. You loaded up on – you just held a toothpaste and buckets of rations and all that stuff. And you said if you were to start again today, you would do things very differently.

And you mentioned earlier that means get a skill. And that skill should be self-defense, protection, et cetera. But as far as things you should have, if someone is going to put together a pack, what do you think needs to be in that pack? Rope, cordage, flashlight, tons of batteries, you know, fire starters of some kind, matches, stuff like that. And some type of, you know, you can buy pretty much everything on the Internet now. So like a small portable little shelter. and then something to purify water is probably a pretty big thing to have. But then how do you, because there's a question on text line about how far do you go?

Do you do like three days worth of water and expired batteries or do you do full-on like 30-year nuclear fallout shelter preparation? Yeah, I get a lot of hateful comments on my YouTube channel about that I don't focus enough on water. And I think that that kind of, that's more like a geographical thing. Um, I have a, uh, I have a river literally 500 feet from my house. Um, I have plenty of water, but a lot of people don't. Um, but you gotta also remember water goes bad if it sits for years.

So it's pretty much, if you're going to buy stuff, you have to, you have to, you know, cycle it out. You got to replace it, replenish it, use it. Um, cause in all honesty, you know, you're going to have this stuff for probably a pretty long time, but I guess it's better to have it than not have it. We don't have basements in California, sadly. Most places do not But where would the best bunker

Where would us California pussies go Do we hide in our electric cars What do we do Definitely don't put it in your electric car Me personally I just took over my wife's closet I'm sure she loves that No she hates it

All of his bunker stuff in my closet My shoes have been replaced by this giant 12 pound bucket of rice So you don't have an official bunker You just have a closet with supplies Yeah, no, I don't have a bunker. There's plenty of other things I'll waste my money on before that. And so do you fear, though, I fear that in the apocalypse,

we're just going to be stuck with a bunch of 1% rich people who bought bunkers, you know, and it's just we're going to be surrounded by the world's most annoying people. No, they're not going to make it because you have to remember, they all have security teams, and those security teams are highly trained individuals, and those mega rich are not going to make it very far because the guys with the guns are going to just put them down. So the people that will do the best in an apocalypse are the people that are the best at being, quote,

security trained, properly trained, et cetera. Yeah, and also the medical field, too. That's going to be, as a person who needs a skill, that's going to probably be the highest commodity is someone who can sew you back up. I'm going to wear a naughty nurse uniform so that no one takes me out and they assume that I can sew them up.

Yeah, well, what about entertainment? because other than Klein in a nursing costume, do you at least pack some DVDs or something? How are we going to entertain ourselves in an apocalypse? I'm concerned about that. Every day is a fight for your own life. You're just focused on survival. It's one giant reality competition show.

If it was me, I would just offline download a bunch of your shows and just listen to that on my phone. Until I want to end it myself. And I will use my skills to shoot myself in the face. It can either be great or up the suicide rate. Serious question, though, because you do spend a lot of your time looking into this and preparing people. You didn't mention radio, and one of the joys we have being in this medium is that everyone says you've got to keep a crank radio on the ready just in case this happens. How important in everything that, you know, we must have guns, et cetera, is a radio?

Radio is very important, but not just the hand crank radio, but actually, you know, like you could call it a walkie-talkie, you know, a two-way radio. That's going to be important for communication, and most of the ones that you can buy nowadays, you can actually get the FM bands on as well and AM bands. So do you think people like Klein and I, we should just rush for the nearest radio tower

because that's where we'll be the most useful, is just to tell everybody what the hell's going on? Yeah, and your stations are very secure. So, you know, it'd be a good place to hold up. So we've got to come here, Klein. Not if you look at the recent profit report, they're not. But regardless, thank you. All right, well, everyone says it's been just a wildly entertaining and informative chat with you.

In fact, I've heard a lot of surprising things 949 said, but nothing more surprising than the fact that this guy has a wife. So people are surprised by lots of things. It surprises me every morning. Hey, Will, thank you for joining us, and thank you for potentially keeping us safe in case we meet our doomsday scenario, and now we know. So, Allie, all we've got to do is get across country and get to Will's River, and we're going to be safe. Yeah, you're welcome any time. All right, there he is, the great Will, a prepared citizen saving the world. We're just going to get on a donkey and try to head over to Will.

That's right, I'll be the naughty nurse. A lot of people pointing out on the text line, we don't need Will. We've got that canoe guy that's been building that canoe for 10 years in his backyard. He showed it to us at the event. It was very tiny. Yeah, we put up a picture of it. And the fact that he spent more than 10 seconds working on that is surprising. And we got to meet him and his wife.

He was holding it up triumphantly like, I did it! Here's the canoe. It is so little. You couldn't even put a newborn baby in that thing. And then his wife was like, this is my life! And it was great. So great. Anyway, we've got an event happening on Wednesday.

Just a reminder, we'd love to get together with you and hang out. Happens to be Mexican Independence Day. also happens to be... That's what that guy said. It's open to the general public. No tickets needed, but it is going to be at Descanso mid-Miracle Mile, Wilshire Boulevard,

11 a.m. and 1st 106. We'll get themselves a low-slugger shirt. Hopefully you wear it proudly. Don't try to resell it on eBay. And you get yourself gourmet tacos plus some other stuff we have in store for you, live music, etc. And that'll be on Wednesday.

Just a reminder, plan accordingly for next week. Quick break. That's Allie getting ready for Mexican Independence Day. Unpreparedness. That is, yikes. Sorry about that.

More powerful than any firearm. Come right back with your ADD news. We get to that. Alina Bovian will be stopping into the KROQ studios today, which should do wonders for our YouTube. Calm down, Ali. And we have all that plus your news after this quick break. And then your tickets for the opening night of Not Scary Farm in less than 15 minutes right here on KROQ. Not Scary Farm opening night tickets will be yours the second we're done with this, your ADD news.

and a brand new hour of the show will begin on a Friday morning here at KROQ. Grab your Adderall. It's time for ADD News. If you're going to scam, scam old people and kids. That's what they always say.

And a local woman in Orange County... They don't say that. Who says scam old people and kids? Scammers. Allie does now. Yeah, apparently. I mean, if you're going to scam, aren't those the easiest prey?

I think they say... Didn't they say that Gen Z is falling for more scams now than old people? Are they? I think so. I think Gen Z's wouldn't they know

what to look out for those are kids first of all all of our calls get screened now so I have it so like anybody that spam calls me

instantly gets screened by my senior yeah but there's other ways to get scammed in the real world man and I feel like Gen Z's aloof to some of the scams

that have been around for a while so it's new to them they would probably be more you know likely to fall for an email or an Instagram scam

like things that are on social media rather than a phone call phone call is old people stuff yeah anything that involves uh trading money through western union or bitcoin my in-laws get scammed every like every other week right well identity fraud again old and i'm gonna get my heater fixed up this guy

scammed me i mean left and right it's like they can't get any service without being scammed they're the most scammable people i know but this woman in orange county has been arrested for stealing four hundred thousand dollars from a high school football team and i didn't know that high school football teams had that kind of money they sell a lot of m&ms to get that kind of money i mean that's a scam in and of itself let me sell m&ms for my basketball team or football team apparently this woman executed an elaborate scheme to defraud the team's booster club which was a fundraising club and she was serving as the treasurer then she would help raise money and then put the funds into her own bank account and she would use it on things like her mortgage

and paying off credit card bills which is actually responsible you know a responsible way to use the money she's not going on vacations she's just paying her mortgage but still illegal and she She could face now up to 20 years in prison. They said what was also concerning is that this woman is a CPA. And that's my kind of CPA. She knows how to move the money, hide the money. What's a CPA? It's a tax person.

So anytime I've gone to a tax person, they're like, well, give me all your records and be honest. I want someone like this woman who's like, what do you want the government to know? She broke bad. She broke bad good. I know she did. And it worked for a long time. 400 grand. I just wonder how many high school football programs have that kind of money.

I mean, that's a lot. Think of that. Bake sales. I mean, what's the usual? Car washes? Bake sales? Yeah, my daughter's doing a car wash. Right.

She's going to make $400,000? Yeah, so best case scenario at the end of this thing. Well, hopefully she'll do a topless. A couple. That's where the running starts rolling in. Topless car wash. DJ Omar Khan, father of the year right there. For a football team?

Sign me up. Yeah, make some money. Yeah. Everybody has an oopsies at work sometimes. we make mistakes every single day on this show and for the most part our mistakes are meaningless but when you work for a place like the dmv and you make an oopsie mistake it could end up where there's a complete stranger on everyone in the state's driver's license thousands of people are trying to get a new license or state id after more than 8 000 licenses were printed with a

stranger's face same guy i guess so and a birth date of january 12 1967. so on the bottom right right hand corner of everyone's license plate there's this random dude as if it's his driver's license picture and it's just on every happy guy though i like the picture like yeah it's so big it's awesome so great that this one guy is on everybody's driver's license the best is the people commenting on how they knew it wasn't them right the misprints were caused by a vendor error and they're trying to reprint now forcing a lot of upset people to wait i looked at my license it seemed that this man was on here and i automatically knew that it wasn't right like okay maybe they're putting the secretary of state on the licenses but then i'm like girl

the secretary of state is not a black man it's good detective work she realized realized it wasn't her on there and then said maybe they put a picture of the secretary of state on the driver's license instead and they just have him smiling on everything it's so great this guy congrats on your driver's license so funny so if you're stressed at work apparently it's making you worse in bed according to a new study they researched a bunch of different jobs they studied people in various fields they studied their weekly hours their decision making their supervisor support just their level of stress in general and they figured out that specifically men in high stress jobs were 10 times more likely to get the boo what is that oh they kick it can't

keep it up yes if they're stressed out if they're stressed yeah and so that escalated 50 but they were 10 times more likely to get that if they were stressed so that's gonna affect your sex life a lot if you're stressed at work you won't be able to unstress that's your unstress a lot of the guys that are in those like very high profile jobs where they have to like make decisions all day like the big ceos aren't they the ones that like to go get like humiliated and kicked in the face and like farted on and stuff yeah but maybe they just have to do a lot to get it up now Oh, so that's all like the counterbalance to stress? I like to set my nipples on fire because just regular stuff doesn't work anymore.

I had so many unscheduled meetings this week. Someone's got to go ahead and stick a board in me. Someone has to stab me with their stilettos. Right. All right. Well, there you go. There it is. There it is.

That's a medical problem that has never happened to me before. And there we go. Back again. I don't think you've ever had that issue. No. Sadly, that has not been an issue. Sadly, that's not an issue. My wife's hoping.

Why is that sad? Well, I think my wife's hoping that's an issue. She's like, no, it still works, damn. At this point, still nothing. We get into a brand new hour of the show right now. And the very first thing we do is get you into Not Scary Farm opening night. If you're the 20th caller at this exact moment, 800-520-1067. Let's go.

This is the world famous KROQ. Oh, yeah. Thanks for listening to KROQ. Thank you for following along. If you are watching, we are on YouTube streaming there as well. What an hour to be alive together again on the world famous KROQ. We have tickets for you right now, four-pack. We'll get you into Not Scary Farm opening night.

You'll be there. Get them first screams of the season. And then we have lots of other stuff to get through this hour. We got some Johnny Doesn't Know. We have a Box of Shame plan. No! And one of our absolute favorite guests, Alina Bovian, formerly of KTLA, now LA Magazine, and I think had something to do with our show being declared Best of LA.

I thought that was like a public vote situation, And I was really proud that the public voted for us. But I think she was just doing us a solid. I think she was. Yeah, she was one of the very big stories when KTLA had that mass firing. And they fired a lot of people who had been there a long time. And Alina Bovian, I think, was fired on her birthday or just before her birthday. Yeah, it was like a big four-year birthday gift from KTLA.

Yeah, but now it seems she's on to bigger and better things. So, and then... Happy birthday wheelchair. That's what we say. That's right. It's the anniversary. We say good morning now to our 20th caller. We'll play that for her.

I think that's Omar's favorite new drop. I really do. I mean, anytime happy birthday is mentioned, they have to play it. How long will it take for Alina to hate us? I think today will be the day. Hey, is our boss that usually doesn't come in on Friday? Is he in today? I bet he'll be here.

The parking lot's full. The parking lot is full today. Everyone who's ever worked here came in today. Usually it's a ghost down around here. Hey, Tiffany from Pico Rivera, good morning. Hi, good morning. How are you guys? Doing well.

Happy birthday wheelchair to you as well because you are the 20th caller. So you'll be going to some Not Scary Farm opening night. Get ready for them screams, all right? Thank you so much. Thank you for starting your day and weekend with us here on KROQ. If you are in a wheelchair, do you get to skip the lines at Not Scary Farm for the scary mazes? Or is that just for roller coasters and stuff? That's a great question.

Like, if you can wheel yourself through the thing, you should be able to wait in line with everybody else. Let me just make sure I'm hearing your point clearly. You're saying that if you are physically handicapped, when it comes to a maze, a haunted maze, you shouldn't get preferential treatment. Why would you? If you're getting on a roller coaster, someone has to help you get on the roller coaster. That's an extra process. I understand that it takes more time and assistance and things like that. But if you're just rolling through a maze, you're just rolling while people are walking.

This is Allie, by the way. She's decided to bring this up. Unprompted. And I apologize. Tiffany, I know you're still on the phone. We're in the middle of giving you tickets. But Allie's decided to go on some sort of a weird rant against the handicap. Tiffany, you know what I'm talking about, right?

Yeah. Oh, boy. She does not want to jump in on this one. All right. Well, there you have it. A very welcoming show. We're in the line with the rest of us. Unless you're a cripple, in which case get to the back of the line, loser.

Right, Allie? That's what she's saying. All right. We'll get into some Johnny Doesn't Know in a moment. And if you'd like to play with us, you're more than welcome to call now, 800-520-1067. And we have some questions. These are very general intelligence-level questions.

And if you do better than Johnny, just by predicting if he will know the answers, yes or no, you don't need to actually know the answers yourself, you will win something from us here at KROQ. So call now, play next, 800-520-1067. That is after some System of a Down on the world-famous K-Rock. All right, it's K-Rock. It's Friday. We have that going for us, and we're going to give you something right now.

If you're able to predict if Johnny will know answers to very simple questions, I think Johnny's going to try to seem smart today because Alina has arrived. She's in the other room. I know. She can hear us right now. I know. The last time that she was here, Johnny, you did that weird thing where you sat in the corner the whole time and watched her interview. And my spot is open for me to go back to again today.

Your cuckold corner? Cuckold corner. Yep. Johnny's going back to his corner. He's only done that one other time. It's remarkable how weird everyone acts. He'll just fluff himself. When a bovian's in the building.

All right, well, let's get into it, Johnny. We've got some questions. These are general knowledge, but pretty easy. In fact, these were rated at a fourth grade level of easy. Damn it. But that doesn't mean Johnny will know the answers. It's time for Johnny Doesn't Know. Here we go.

Johnny doesn't know. And I was like, okay. Oh, Johnny doesn't know. I didn't know Vegas was like in that for like a while. Johnny doesn't know. Johnny doesn't know. Gelato sounds like Jell-O. Johnny doesn't know.

It goes... Wiggles. All right. Let's go ahead and get our first contestant on the air. And you don't need to know the answer. You just need to know if Johnny will know or at least predict. Adrian, welcome to KROQ and good morning to you. Adrian.

David. All right. We'll go with that. Off to a great start. Let's go. It's a strong start. Let's go. Who screened your call?

Was that a Vanessa or a Johnny? I think... No, it was me. I remember I took all the calls. Oh, Johnny. Yeah, and you asked him to spell his name like we talked about and all that stuff? No, you know me. I don't care about that.

I've been doing this four years. We know. I've been doing this four years. Don't give me notes. I've been doing this. So what is your name? David. David.

Crystal clear. That sounds close enough, yeah. Yeah, it's just a word jumble. Yeah. All right, so Johnny didn't know your name. Let's go to this one, though. Will Johnny know what the center of an atom is called? Yes or no?

He didn't know my name, so I'm going to go with no. All right. David and or Adrian says no. Johnny, he's confident you will not know what the center of an atom is called. Do you know? Shout out my boy Nacho Libre. The center of the atom is called the nucleus.

Wow, sorry. Nucleus. Wrong name, wrong prediction. We move on. Johnny, I told you. I knew he was going to come in here today, and all of a sudden he was going to act all smart and stuff. Turn on the jets, man.

Yeah, but he only knows it because of Nacho Libre. What's wrong with Nacho Libre? Shout out. Yeah. I'm sure all of us. Every teacher is like, why? Why did I bother? Yeah.

This guy got one question right, and he gave the credit to Nacho Libre. Nucleus. Hey, Lori, good morning. Welcome to KROQ. Hi. Hello. Good morning. Johnny?

Mm-hmm. What is the small dash call that is used to connect words together? Will Johnny know this, yes or no? I'm going to say yes. Johnny, it's a small dash and it's used to connect words together. What is the name for it? She thinks you will know. Klein, are you referring to what is the hyphen?

Wow. So this is where genius Johnny comes in and tries to confuse us all. When he puts his fingers together in a triangle. It makes you look smarter when you connect your fingertips. He's also done that before and given us a completely wrong answer. Did that when he thought that cheese was... I do declare mayonnaise. yeah we've had that many times on this show all right two people uh have gone only one is

predicted correctly she said johnny would know no she said good job so hold on put her on as a right one all right we say hi to chris now in valencia good morning chris and welcome to k rock giant doesn't know hey guys good morning johnny what is three fourths as a decibel decimal let me ask it again klein go ahead you were looking away you were confused because i was I was like, what the hell did he just say? What is three-fourths as a decimal? Well, Chris, will Johnny know this, yes or no? I would say no.

I don't know it. You don't know what three-fourths is as a decimal? Really? All right. So he doesn't think Johnny will know this as well. You're Johnny's people. Johnny, think about it before you answer. Yes, I'm ready to go, Mr. Klein.

He says you will not know. It is going to be 0.75. Wow. This is so rare. Three-quarters, 75%. Johnny usually gets tripped up when you start doing fractions. When you start doing math at all. Math is tough for Johnny.

English is your subject. English is my subject. I could write like a, yeah. I could write like a, yeah. I was going to say a bad word, but I was like, yeah. Say hi. Mike in Anaheim. Good morning.

Welcome to Johnny Doesn't Know on KROQ. So far, Johnny's gotten a lot correct today, which is rare, but I assumed he's going to try to put his best foot forward. Johnny, what is a shape with six sides called? Will Johnny know this? Mike, yes or no? Yes, he will. All right, Johnny.

He believes the streak continues. A shape with six sides is called what? Big Mike, I got you. Six-sided shape, a hexagon. Damn. Hexagon, baby. Johnny's a genius over here. Johnny's on a heater today.

I don't think in the history of Johnny doesn't know he's ever gotten every question right. He's gotten a few where he's gotten four out of six or something. Do you know what the stop sign one is? No. Pentagon is five. Oh, man. Hexagon is six. And that's as far as you go?

I'm stumped after that. What's an eight-sided thing called? An eight-sided... Oh, a spider is an eight-sided thing. Oh, man. Amazing. Nice. Just when I thought...

Just when we started calling him Johnny Genius, he gave us that. Haley. We got to do this last one, then we got to move on. Our guests are waiting. Hello. Hi, good morning.

Will Johnny know what 25% of 200 is? I could hope so, yes. Yes. You have a $200 bill at a restaurant. You want to leave a nice 25% tip. How much are you leaving, Johnny? I do it, but I got to take a minute and write it out and do all this crap. I know I could do it, though.

I know the answer. I just don't know right off the top of my head. You want some paper and a naked lady pen? Yeah. Whoa. Whoa. Okay. Johnny's just looking at the pen now.

Hold on. Give him a second to... It's weird you have to turn it upside down to see her breasts, though. You kind of like... I would like it the other way. Yeah. Johnny, focus on the problem at hand. Yeah.

Yeah, sorry. What was it? $200 of what? What is 25% of 200? Okay. She says you will not know. 25% of 200. 125.

Oh, man. 12. Damn. 12. Damn. 20. 25% of 200. That's right.

Look at his head. He was feeling so confident about himself a moment ago. It wasn't until you just gave me a math question. And I was like, bro, what do I look like, a calculator? That stuff's already printed out on the receipt before I signed the check. Right. You have a little guide at the bottom. You couldn't figure that out if you had to?

I probably could, but I mean, I can't do it under pressure live. Are you leaving waiters $125 tips on a $25 tip? God, no. I don't do that. Haley said you wouldn't know. I'll give you one more chance to give us the right answer. 25% of $200. Let's go $50.

Wow. Is that right? Wow. Far cry from 125. Wow. 50. Haley, I'm so sorry. All right.

Well, listen, one of you that got your question right is going to win yourself six tickets to the Sand Sports Super Show, so hang tight for those tickets. We take ourselves a quick break. When we get back, the woman responsible for declaring our show the best in L.A. I wonder if she still feels that way after hearing what she just heard. Alina Bovian joins us in the KROQ studios. After this, we are on YouTube streaming live there and more on KROQ after these words. 106.7 KROP, Klein Alley Show, Friday morning.

Back in our studios right now. She's one of our favorites. Alley has been as excited as I've seen her ever this morning. And it wasn't for me for a change. Alina Abovian. I look at your mug every day. KTLA was how we all welcomed her into our lives. And then they did the worst possible thing they could have done.

What a terrible decision. I can't say this enough. I mean, if you've got a bunch of people on the chopping block, how are you like, Alina Abovian, she's got to go. She should have been the last one standing there. But regardless, it doesn't matter what we think. We have no power. And now she's at L.A. Mag, and it's great to have you back on KROQ, Alina.

Ever since you were in here the first time, people said, have her in every day, and here you are. Happy to be back, guys. Thank you for being here. Congrats on all the things that have been going on. I guess we should probably give you a proper thank you on KROQ, because I didn't realize when you put together The Best of L.A., which was the August issue of L.A. Magazine. Klein said he used to read that every year. I did. I look forward to it.

It's like my Bible. I've got to eat there. I've got to go there. I still think of it like that, but I never thought we would ever be featured in there. And then you pulled some strings and you made it happen. And I didn't realize that really, was it just your opinion that we're the best radio show? Or did other people actually have that opinion as well? No, I think the proof is in the pudding, guys, right?

I mean, look at your numbers, the way that you guys are bringing in the audience. I mean, it's tough to do nowadays, especially in radio. So I thought that that deserves some honorable mention. So you're helping make these decisions and print out the final copies, right? And when it comes to, you know, radio show, yeah, you're helping make that decision. Are you making equally important decisions on the best puppet show and all the other things that have been in L.A. Magazine? Like, you're making all those decisions? I'm not making all the decisions.

We have a team of editors, so we all come together and decide what decides, what needs to be the best and what does not. Who put Zibby's Bookshop on the list? I was disappointed. That wasn't me. Okay, I'm just curious as to, Allie, we're on a list with Zibby's Bookshop and The Bubble Show. I hate Zibby. I've always had him. Okay, don't knock a good bubble show.

I would imagine a good bubble show is worthy of knowing about. And I'm going to tell you right now, if you've not seen a good bubble show, you haven't lived. So I do know that on the page that you put us in, and I don't know if this was your call or the editors, the other editors there, you have an opportunity to put one picture that goes with the page. And you decided instead of putting a picture of Allie and I on the page, you put a picture of the outside of a building. And I believe it was a puppet theater. It was the Marionette Theater. Correct.

Was that your call? Well, haven't you guys been out there enough? Let's get some other people. I mean, the puppet theater needs press. Yeah, but I mean, you have a chance for one little tiny picture and you could have put Allie. Allie, I think you went with the right call. I'm not saying you made the wrong call. I think it was the wise decision, but that just proves you're probably good at what you do.

You go, let's put a building out there instead of those guys. Totally. I mean, you can be humble. You don't need to be seen as much. You can't get wrong angles on a building. Yeah, Allie and I put together our own list, which we're going to share with you in a moment, because you focused on the best of L.A. We have a list we put together, the worst of L.A., but we fight about a lot of things.

Like, for instance, we were talking in the category of worst parking lot in L.A. Allie's got her own theory on this. Any Trader Joe's. Whoa! That's crazy. I have it written right here. Parking. I can't read my writing.

Trader Joe's. I have it written right here. Allie believes. I put the Hollywood Bowl. Hollywood Bowl. Okay. For sure. But if you're going to pick right now, you know what's worse than the Hollywood Bowl?

The Greek. The Greek or the Rose Bowl. That one's pretty bad, too. Yeah, but they don't stack you. Rose Bowl, you park on a golf course, which sucks. I think it's the stacking that makes Hollywood Bowl parking my choice. But Alina said what I said, and I think anyone can agree. Any Trader Joe's parking lot is the worst.

But that's also in any city. Of course. I think someone just died at the one down the street, right? I mean, and how many times have we seen a car actually drive into a Trader Joe's? That's happening regularly now. Yeah. People love those. They love the new stuff.

They got to check it out first. You can just make your own parking spots there at the front of the building. Yeah, you have to. We'll get into our list in a moment because you're going to help us make some decisions. But you're here not only to hang out and all that stuff, and you're always welcome here. You do have a cool event that's going on that we should mention because it's a food event. We spend a lot of time talking about food. We're all obsessed with food.

And this is happening in Malibu. And tickets are available at LAMag.com. But what exactly is going to go down there? So, it's our annual food event happening at Calamigos Ranch. So, tucked away in Malibu. It's during the day. It's on a Sunday. We have 30 of LA's top restaurants.

We have a wine tasting, a margarita bar, cigar lounge. I mean, it's so fun. $115 per ticket. And we're giving away two this morning. Nice. Oh, look at that. We get to give away some tickets. So if you're interested and you like eating.

This sounds fancy like something you would like to go to. I know they have some pizza pop-up that happens there that everyone's been telling me I got to go check out. I want you to check out the cigar lounge. I want you to just talk to other guys about cigars. In the cigar lounge? You're a cigar gal? I've never. I like to be around heavy smoke.

I'm a big fan of secondhand smoking cigars as opposed to firsthand. Like I like smelling a cigar in the distance. We ever walk into a cigar shop and you're like, ah, it smells like old man. I like a guy that can smoke a cigar but not me I'm a big cigar guy now all of a sudden I'm super into it I was going to be at Calamigos Ranch

smoking cigars anyway is that the secret to your sexy voice it's the cigars in fact Allie doesn't realize this but I'm turning her desk into my humidor my walk in humidor I'm a big cigar guy now but this event is happening we have tickets right now

we'll give those away in a moment And we're going to have Alina help us break down the worst of L.A. The worst person, the worst tourist, the worst freeway. Worst landmark. We've got a whole list to get into, and we're going to find out what she's been up to. All after Blink-182 on KROQ. All right, Blink, it's KROQ. We're Klein and Ali's show in the studio right now.

You can watch us on YouTube. I recommend you head over there. Alina Abovian, who we just found out is now single. And a lot of people are asking that on the text line. Do you want to talk about that at all before we get into our worst of L.A. list? Yes, we do. Get into the worst guys of L.A. list. Worst guys of L.A.

Who are the worst guys of L.A.? Good one. Vanessa would agree, right, Vanessa? Yeah, let's talk about it. Oh, Vanessa's got her own list. Vanessa, is she single? Yeah, yeah, very single. She's with you.

She's nominating chefs, right, as the worst? Yeah, Vanessa. Yeah, they're not good. I wouldn't date a chef. You wouldn't date a chef either? Uh-uh. Never a chef, not an actor. Sorry.

There's certain people who... Really, I dated a chef and I thought it was great because she would always make me food or bring it home from her work and it was delicious. Yeah, but they don't want to do that when they're done doing that all day. It's like people say dating a nurse is tough because they're done being nice at work

and then they come home and they're not nice. Yeah, but first dating a chef is nice because that's how they impress you. At the beginning. Yes, I went over to her house and she was like, let me show you how to make bananas foster. I set the bananas on fire and I was like, this is awesome. So, Alina, the people you will not date include the following.

Chefs, actors, who else? Have you dated famous actors? One. One that we would know? Yes. Actually famous? Mm-hmm. Could you say the name or no?

No. What does it rhyme with? Lane. Wayne. Wayne. Wayne Brady. Wayne Brady. That's cool.

Now, was it a comedian act, funny act, or a dramatic actor? He went dramatic toward the end. Uh-huh. Yeah. Toward the end? Is he dead? Our listeners will come up with it. Is he old?

They're much better at cracking these codes than we are. This is like 20 questions. Come on. Google a picture. Does he like cigars, does he? Google. I don't know. I don't think he was.

Okay. Moving on. Dave's definitely Wayne. How do you feel about radio DJs? Yeah, are they out? I don't know. No, they're definitely out. They are now.

I don't want anyone in my industry. Yeah, yeah. No one in media. That makes sense. It has to be something completely different. Yeah. Like a finance guy. Right, that's what I do.

You know? I just finance. I trade stocks on the weekends. You are probably the worst person with money. Ali, shut it. All right? I got a savings bond. I haven't cashed yet, so shut your mouth.

Helena, you're on KROQ. Good morning. Hi. Hey, good morning. I assume you want to go eat the most delicious food on the planet and be a part of this event. Los Angeles Magazine's food event, 2026, October 4th at Calamigos Ranch in Malibu. You've got two tickets. Enjoy and thank Alina for those.

They're not from us. Thanks, Alina. You're welcome. I'll see you there. You'll be there. I'll be in the cigar lounge, Ali. You know how I do. We've got our list now.

These are the worst of L.A., but you need to help us decide. By the way, are you serious about letting Allie and I help you find a date? We talked about this during the last song, but would you be opposed to that? Look, I'm a very happy single gal, but if you have someone incredible, maybe. We don't. No? No. We have a guy by the name of Pantyhose Greg.

I don't know if you'd like to meet him. He's been wanting a boyfriend and girlfriend for a long time. We have a lot of listeners that I know you like to make it out like everyone who listens to our show is some Hills Have Eyes person. That is not the case. We've been to many of our events, and I go, damn, this is a good crowd of people. They should all date Alina. I'm not saying there aren't eligible bachelors out there. I'm just saying that mostly people who are going to call are going to be like, hey, I want to take you to an In-N-Out truck and then have sex.

Hey, well, listen, that's not a terrible date idea. You mentioned that. I'm going to write that down as a note right there. In-N-Out truck and sex. All right. So only into guys or women, too? Just guys. Just guys.

Sorry, Al. You're out. You're out. You can't do it. Let's get into it now. Eliminating half the population, Alina. The worst. I know what I like.

The worst of the worst in L.A. She will help us decide because she had to edit down every possible place in L.A. to come up with the best of L.A. list. And now we go with our first category, the worst freeway in L.A. Allie, what do you say? I got the 405. It's the five. It's always the five in every direction at any time of day.

The 405 is such a major artery and includes one of the worst commutes in all of Southern California, which is going from L.A. to Orange County. All right, you have to make this decision now. Which one will make it onto the list? I know you may have a different opinion, but we've whittled it down to two. The 5 or the 405, which is the worst freeway in L.A.? I'm going to say the 5. Wow!

Point Klein. Why? What is your decision-making process there? I think the 5, especially going through the 134 as you approach 110 and then going to San Diego or Orange County. Yeah, that's true. If you were a news reporter, you were getting sent all over the place on a daily basis. And I would imagine the amount of times you were sitting on the phone just yelling and punching your news van. Going, why, why?

Right? That must have been all the time. Every day. Except I drive myself. Oh, really? So you had to punch yourself. Punch yourself. It's so hot.

Go to question number two. It's the worst of the worst. Was that out loud? Stop being in traffic. Ow! Who is the worst tourist in L.A.? We are a city that has a lot of tourists. We'll have even more as the Olympics come here, Super Bowls here this year.

Who is the worst tourist? I think the worst tourist in L.A. is the person who only comes for reality TV show landmarks. Like, I'm only going to Erewhon to try the Hailey Beaver smoothie. I'm only going to Health Net because Kim Kardashian went there in one of the episodes of her show. People who are just chasing, you know, locations or Instagram famous places based on reality shows and reality stars. I think the worst tourist, and it's really every city, but it happens a lot in L.A., If they ask you to take a picture, they hand you their phone, and then you take multiple pictures, because that's what you do these days, and then you give them the phone back, and then they immediately look through and critique your photography work. And you go, I just did you a solid here.

I'm not the Ann Geddes. I'm just taking a few pictures of your family. The Ann Geddes, the woman that put the babies in the strawberry costumes. I'm not a professional photographer. I'm not going to put you in a strawberry costume. I'm taking a picture of you in front of a pink wall on Melrose. Let's just call it a day. I don't know another photographer.

Who else? Who else? You're not an Instagram boyfriend? No. I mean, I do take a lot of pictures of my wife. And she's very critical of almost every picture I take. And after the 20th picture, she rejects it. I go, maybe it's you.

It's not me. Oh, well, that's funny. Handing a phone to a guy is useless. Thank you. I agree. I agree. No guys, no moms. No guys, no moms.

My mom, I'm not even in the photo. That's my hand in the Eiffel Tower. All right, we go to the next category now. Wait, which one are you going with? Oh, yeah. Who's worse? Sorry, you have to decide. Who's worse?

Worst tourist. Worst tourist. Between the one Ali said, I said, or you can throw your own in the mix. I gave one that was very specific to L.A., but I think Klein gave one that's very specific to most tourist towns. You know, I think it's the pseudo-intellectual tourist that snubs L.A. because they're from New York and it's better, or they're from another big city. The one who wants to visit and hate it?

Yeah. Exactly. That's a really good one. Yeah, they compare everything to what they have at home. And I love L.A., so I will defend it with very sharp teeth. Right. I mean, he's so horny. Don't, you know, go.

Now, shut up, Klein. We have a guest in here. That's clips of me. Don't pay attention to that. I like the way you kiss me. Shut up. Shut up. That's Omar.

Don't worry about him. Hi, Omar. The next cat, don't even acknowledge he's here. Someone take Omar's machine away now. The next category, I'm glad Omar started playing sound effects, is what is the worst thing that Ali has said on the airwaves of K-Rock? It's the worst of L.A. list. I'm going to give you two options right now, and you can decide.

Go ahead, Omar. Hit her with it. Saw a couple of cute boys and a hot little girl It was a real all-you-can-eat boyfay Okay, that's offensive And that was said out of context We were talking about the Wheel of Fortune announcement Let her decide

There's that clip or there's this clip I've done that with jalapenos in my vagina Alright That one I have no excuse for That was the Wheel of Fortune guy also I'm just too curious about the second one Well, it happened That's curiosity's option.

Like, is it a simple shower fix, or is this an extended care situation? You know, no, Alina, it's not. You have to just wait it out, and it really sucks. I only had to go to urgent care with a whole made-up story about salsa going wrong. Well, if you cut jalapenos, even if you wash your hands, doesn't mean it's all gone, the jalapenos. I'm just saying be careful where you touch. It's a cautionary tale more than anything else. The next category.

I don't think we have to choose there. Wait a minute. I have ones where the worst thing that Klein ever said. Omar Hinnom. I've never said anything bad ever. Omar, hit it. I only say good things. Don't hit it.

You've got two choices here. I'm a cigar guy. I do stocks on the weekend. That's all we need to worry about. Okay? Relax. Sweet knockers. There you go.

I've never said that. And hit it. Big fat asses. That was me in code. That was him describing me. All right. Let's go to this final round now. Okay.

Who is the worst local news station? Now, I have to say it's KTLA. I also had KTLA. Because they fired Alina Abovian. And who could do that? Who could do that? Would you agree it's the worst local news station, even though you have friends that still work there? Listen, if you can't hold on to a good thing, you're going to fumble it.

I know. That's right. And I feel like that's going to you, Wayne, whoever you are. Wayne with the cigars. That's Wayne. We're talking to you, Wayne. In all seriousness, you're always fun to have here. Long live HIV.

Omar, we're out of them. We're out of them. Don't hit it. No, don't hit it. Don't listen to them this morning. Stop hitting it. Stop hitting it. I never said that.

Thank you, Alina. for talking to us. That's AI. Anything bad I've said is AI. You can't blame AI. It is. In all seriousness, though, you're always welcome here.

Thanks, guys. And when you put us in the article, we did an interview downstairs, and then is that interview going to go online? Was it the toughest interview you've ever done?

Yeah. I know you've interviewed heads of state. An article on an interview will come out next week. Who's more fun to talk to, us or Karen Bass? Seriously, guys.

I mean, she sounds like a great time. Yeah, I know. Actually, you know, when she walks into a room, She always makes eye contact with me. Oh, that's good. Yeah, but she doesn't have jalapenos in her vagina like Allie.

I bet she does. Okay. Let's get weird real quick. Here's the good news. If you're a fan of Lena Abovian, she's single, and she's going to allow us to help her find a date for her. I don't know. I said that at the beginning of this interview. And now we're locking it in.

And now it is a verbal contract. So, Vanessa, get 50 eligible bachelors queued up for Monday, and we'll roll with this into next week. Okay. And then we will continue. And maybe the first date can happen at that big event, which is going down in Malibu. No, no. He's not bothering me at my place of work. You can bring her there.

We got a blind guy. We got a guy with one arm. Yeah. Are you into one arm guys? And a guy with one leg now. No. Oh, that's right. He is taken, though.

One leg Louie or whatever? Yeah, he is a girlfriend. All right. Damn. I missed out on one leg Louie. I know. You did. You did.

The good ones are gone so fast. I should have been here last week. It's too bad. All right. Well, we'll come back. We have to do the news next and then a new hour of the show. Of course, all things Alina on Instagram, Alina underscore Abovian, LAMag.com. We will take a break.

More show after this. Get rocked. Get rocked. We are Klein Alley Show. We'll get into the ADD news. Then a brand new hour of the show will officially begin. We are live for the calls at 800-520-1067. When we're not here, there's a goat line here for you.

Good morning, team. Happy Friday. Vanessa, whose house is it? Rob's house. It's harder to say that after what took place last night, but that's okay. You're bringing a lot of people a lot of happiness, and even though you're not a real Rams fan, you're a forced Rams fan. People love hearing it.

Hey, Clyde and Allie show. This is Listener Eddie from Mar Vista. Relatively new to the show, but I wanted to call in and say to producer Vanessa, her yelling Rams house is hilarious. It brings so much joy, and I just wanted to let her know that. So, producer Vanessa, just know that, yes, the job may be stressful, and you have your days when it seems like it's too much. Just know that you being your genuine Colombian self brings happiness and joy to all your listeners.

Oh, that's so sweet. God bless you and the hot dogs. I love the hot dogs. You know, last week, Allie, you left early because that's your move on Fridays. But Vanessa, during the Box of Shame, we learned. Why didn't we learn from the Box of Shame? You release it and you don't speak on it again. I thought that was the whole thing.

That's right. So I won't tell you that she has been getting the nervous poops again at work and she clogged a toilet down the hall. Oh, damn. Look, I think that's easy to do around here. Not that it's happened to me, but I think there's... Yes, it has. They brought it up in the whole company meeting.

Didn't they have to hire people, like a crew? They had to reinstall a whole thing. They didn't have to reinstall a toilet. Change all the pipes in this place. Jake's right. It was the pipes. They had to put bigger pipes. Bigger poo leak.

Allie, you... There was no poop involved. I was testing out different toilet papers to let you know that I can spot my brand just by feel alone. When they put a stint in people's heart to get more blood flow, they had to put a stint in the pipes because of what Allie did. And then the guy brought it up at the whole company meeting. They did make a comment about me clogging the toilets, which was very embarrassing. That was a couple of years ago. Our meetings are much more positive now.

Yeah, we don't have them anymore. That's why. Let's get into your news right now. Here we go. Grab your Adderall. it's time for add news klein it's friday you're here i'm here wow even though leaving early is my move and you'll be here monday too right but you have been a fan of the four-day workweek for a long time and bernie sanders is still in congress he's still fighting the good fight

and he is introducing a new bill to make the four-day workweek permanent in america what if your workweek got shorter without your paycheck taking a hit well senator bernie sanders is pushing a bill that could turn the traditional 40-hour work week on its head he wants to move the standard work week to 32 hours four days with no cut in pay it's weirdly comforting to hear him talk and he's like this is ridiculous the fact that we're doing this in the shorter work week over several years with overtime kicking in after 32 hours would you take a four-day work week if your paycheck stayed the same what a question stupid question no i wouldn't do it absolutely but they say that this is going to be nearly impossible to pass because they've tested it

in so many other countries that's what i thought too and they're like because labor costs and blah blah blah i'm like but i don't think that's true i i don't think that there really is if it was going to make the company more money then they would do it in a heartbeat i don't think they're necessarily going to make more money but i i always thought that productivity either stays the same or gets better. I spend the least amount of money when I'm here because I'm working.

But when I'm out, I got to kill time like on that three-day Labor Day weekend. So true. I'm out doing stuff. Every time you're not working, you're spending.

Paying for puppy yoga and stuff. So I'm helping the economy. Did you ever get that money back? No. No. And they told me to stop contacting them. They did?

Yeah. Very not namaste puppy yoga. Very not namaste. You know, I know at least one other person who has been puppy yoga scammed as well. The same.

Well, it wasn't. I think it was a mistake where they booked the wrong location. but I think there is a puppy yoga scam going around because it seems to happen more than I thought. Two times is way more than I thought. I mean, I understand I've been duped by some things,

but I never thought I'd be in this sort of a feud with puppy yoga. I did. I think we all knew. When you see a spider in your place, of course, the instinct is to crush it. But then when you get a little bit of a heart, have some empathy, you think, hey, maybe I shouldn't kill this spider. I'm damaging the ecosystem. Why don't I take it, trap it under a cup, and put it outside? Well, according to a new study, that's not right either.

In fact, it's potentially worse. Most house spiders have never lived outside at all, especially like the, quote, American house spider, which is the most common one you would see inside your place. Oh, so you're giving them a much scarier death sentence. It has adapted to indoor life, so putting it in the yard or outside doesn't return it to its native habitat. It actually exiles it from its habitat, and it's very difficult for it to survive.

So, you're giving it a slow death by putting it outside because it has no idea how to navigate the outside world. If you just go old school, crush it with a shoe. You're giving it a quick death. It's a nice, sweet, that's like one of those. Like pulling the ripcord. It's one of those nice deaths, like a samurai death right there. You're giving them a proper death with like full glory. Right, exactly.

But they said dehydration, predators, and the cold would make relocation a likely death sentence. So, you're going to kill the spider slowly by putting it outside. so I guess you're just supposed to leave it there which is not an option for a lot of people especially people like your wife or Vanessa who can't get away from the fact that there's a spider there once it's there, that is the focus until it's no longer there

if I've ever not successfully been able to kill the spider and it escapes into the room that room is now a room we don't go into anymore pretend that room doesn't exist anymore then everyone has to have a spider room no! if it drops into the bed, I will f***ing kill you

be smart Every room and piece of furniture will be eliminated one by one until you're just standing in the entryway with nothing to do. And then finally, Snoop has another gig to add to his 5,000 other gigs. He will be hosting the MTV VMAs, which are taking place in L.A. later this month. In one of the widest news reports I've ever seen, it said, quote, It's the one and only D-O-double-G, revealed the social media video, which showed him appearing from a cloud of smoke, a nod to his famous enthusiasm for cannabis. Man, that is well written. congratulations

it's about time Snoop got another job congrats to the dog father according to Christine the Snooze writer these are the VMAs that

that no one cares about Nirvana's getting that big that big honor at the Vanguard Award correct yeah alright so there you go

alright well there's some stuff happening in the world now you're all caught up we think getting through a brand new hour of the show in moments

the greatest hour of your life perhaps and even if it's not it's Friday so you should be in a good mood because of that this is the world famous

K-Rock We've got it, Friday. Whose house? Ram's house. That's right. Not in Australia. Not, definitely not. It's okay, we started slow, but we're coming back up.

I just know it. Oh, cool. You have some rah-rah language. She's a big Rams fan. Rah-rah, let's go. She watched the first half of the game. Who's the field player? Yeah, who'd you...

Puka. Who? What did you call me? Puka. I think that was racist. Oh, yeah, I don't think that's okay. Is there a Puka player? Because I definitely heard that yesterday.

Mine's a very good Puka player. More of her witchcraft. she's doing more of those spells upon us. Anyway, we're all fans of teams now that we're forced to enjoy because forced fandom, what the hell, why not? And we'll be excited. We'll talk about some of the games happening this weekend. A little bit later this hour on the show,

we have tickets for you, I think, to give you to more stuff. But if not, oh well, it's just us. Not scary. Oh yeah, let's do that right now. Four tickets, Not Scary Farm opening night, 800-520-1067. In fact, let's get you in the spirit for Halloween by giving you some Dracula.

And if you are the 20th caller, at the end of the song, we pick you up and give you the good news. Four tickets, first screams of the season at Not Scary Farm. And then everything else we have in store for you on a Friday morning right here on KROQ. Just keep giving and giving and giving. And if you'd like to bring us with you, you get four tickets. So if you don't have that many kids or friends, we are always available. Janet? Oh, my God.

I did win. Well, that's our job. Hold on. Don't ruin, that's the fun part of our job. You can't break the news to yourself. It makes us irrelevant. You guys answered me. Oh, my God.

Let's try this again, because you've taken all of the glory away from us. Hey, Janet. I'm sorry. Yes, I'm here. Did I win? No. Oh, my gosh. Next caller.

Why would you do that? No. Janet, you won, but you already knew that, because you spoiled it for yourself and for us, but congratulations. Enjoy yourself, all that fun at Not Scary Farm. Opening night, you will be there, okay? So awesome. Thank you so much.

All right. That's happening September 17th through Halloween. And tickets every hour, including right now and all day long straight up through 6 p.m. on KROQ. I know we have the box of shame, but I think we should talk about the shows that we are watching. On the off chance that you get an opportunity, maybe some downtime. And, yeah, football's back, so let's be completely honest. Most people are not going to leave their couch. If you're a fan of college, you've got that all day Saturday.

Then you've got NFL all day Sunday. It's going to be hard for me to pick anything else to possibly watch, but maybe there's something in your house that doesn't like football, and you need to occupy them on a different TV so you can watch football. It's time for us to break down what we're watching right now because maybe you hear about your next favorite show on Weekend Watchers. And now it's time for Weekend Watchers. Let's start with Vanessa, who is watching.

I was so afraid that you were going to start with me because I forgot the name of my show. But I know what it's about. It's all football. Is it about Elmo? Same person. No, it's like, it takes place in Australia. A street, sesame, and a street.

I'm looking for the name because I forgot the name. Her name is Gabby. She has a dollhouse. No, okay. It takes place in Australia. She explores and her name is Dora. Can I tell you what it is? Yeah, it's Bluey.

Bluey. You caught me. We knew it. What is it? Now, okay, so it's a period piece. So, that means that these girls couldn't have jobs. They could only get married, but this girl wanted to be a writer. She's like, uh-uh, I'm going to become a writer.

And that whole goal, her aunt is trying to get her to get married, and she doesn't. Boring. No, it's a great show. If you're a girl, you'll like it. It's so memorable. It's so memorable, you don't know the name of it. It's because it's a hard name, and you guys know I'm not good at names. Well, I got to hear you say the name of it now.

Hold on, I'm looking for it. Talk to someone else while I look for the name. No, no, no, we'll be stalling. We're talking to you, Vanessa. Please don't do this to me. This is the same person whose picks recently have included New Girls, re-watching that over and over again, and The Rookie. Comfort Show. Right, and those are the shows she's usually watching.

But when she's not watching The Rookie or New Girl. Or the first half of Rams games. Right, or the first half of Rams games. You know what? That was a lot of football that I did for you guys. For you. You're the fan now. And the show that you are recommending everyone watches this weekend, which is available on what streamer?

Netflix. Netflix. It's called... Dude, I cannot find the name. I wasn't ready because I needed a second. I'm sorry. So you are... This is a new one?

Yeah, it's a new show. It's eight episodes. And it's about an Australian woman. Yeah. Who wants to work. Okay, Netflix. She's an Australian woman. It's a period of time.

I mean, I would think of all the people on the show that would have the proper stuff ready to go when we needed it. Yeah, it's me. I know. I've done too many things. Of the show. My Brilliant Career? That one. It's that one.

That's hard to say. I was like, this can't be it. It's that one, okay? Okay? What's hard about that? Relax. Mine? Because in my brain, I remember BR, and I was like, it must have been something hard

because I can't remember. So you are suggesting, if anyone has downtime this weekend, they watch that show on Netflix called what? It's funny. It's cute. And once again, it's called what? My Brilliant Career. She can't say it.

I already forgot. Berlin Courier. She already forgot. So good. That's great. So good. Unbelievable. I'm sold.

You know what, guys? Let's not do the rest of these picks. I think we're all going to watch Vanessa's show. Jake, what are you watching? I'm actually watching two shows, which is rare because I don't watch any TV. Probably a lot of anime in your house. I hate anime. You know it, so shut up.

First, what I really like is I like superhero stuff, so I'm watching Lanterns, which I really enjoy. But the other show I like on HBO is Monsters of God, which is all about the underground reptile trade. It's crazy. It's very similar. Oh, you were saying. Didn't you watch that? I watched the first episode, and as soon as Jake said he was going to do it, I got out of it.

No, we're not. I got out of it quickly. But it's similar to the Crazy Chimp show that we watch. It's reptile people? Except these people have alligators in their backyard. Actually, I think it's done by the same guy who did that Tiger King. Yeah, it's Kimono Dragons. And these reptile people are effing weird, man.

and they're weirdos. Weirder than the lion people? I get why Jake, yeah, I think they are, and I think I get why Jake likes it, because it's constantly guys trying to get snakes to mate and then selling the snakes and trading them. Jake is definitely lizard people for Jason. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's like that new song that Wolves of Glendale debuted on K-Rock. I'm a reptile guy. Reptile guy. That's like Jake. He's a reptile guy. Not that. No, but you would be reptile guy.

You don't have enough space for a lizard, but if you had. You'd have more space. I bet you know multiple people with lizards. Do you not? Jake pretty much lives in an atrium, whatever that thing is called. He's the lizard. He is the lizard.

It's like bathing under a sun lamp. What are you watching? I'm watching Furious with Emmy Rossum. Oh, good show. Great show. Yeah, this one is on Hulu, so it could also be Disney Plus if you have the package. But Emmy Rossum, and she plays a cop, and she's trying to track down a female serial killer. She has a new job at the FBI, but she used to be a homicide investigator.

That's good. And, yeah, it's really good. It's really twisted. There's a lot of sexy stuff, sexy through lines, but also it's really messed up. And then it kind of goes to the themes of, like, there's a thin line between victim and suspect. You know what I mean? Like, she's innocent and she's the cop, but is she so innocent? Because she wants dark things, too.

She's a naughty girl. Naughty. Whoa. I watched the same show. Didn't pick up a lot of that, but okay. But it's good. Don't you agree? It's a great show.

Yeah, Furious is good. Omar, what are you watching? You know, at my house right now, the kids are around a lot. So we're watching a lot of reruns of I Love Lucy on Pluto TV. Oh, great. Yeah, but when I did, I did get a chance to see something on Netflix and it was not great. It was okay. It was untold, Mr. T, that I pity the fool.

Oh, yeah, that comes up on my thing, too. And it's not worth watching. I watched it. It was not great. I thought it was going to be really insightful and it was going to kind of like highlight on, you know, a lot of like behind the scenes. But it was like pretty much stuff that we already knew. Yeah, Netflix is getting a little hit or miss with documentaries. I sent you a good one, though, Mother's Instinct.

That was crazy. That's a crazy one. That woman is... You have to start the documentary and go, first 20 minutes, am I in on this story? Do I care? And then you can decide whether you want to move on. It's like a weird twist and turn.

Jake, what are you... Now, Johnny, what are you watching? Well, I don't really watch TV nowadays anymore. All right, moving on. Wait, wait. But I watch, on my Superbox, I watch Everybody Hates Chris, 24 hours. That's a...

Wow. What a specific show. It's an interesting throwback right there. God, I don't... I remember that. Wait, you just mentioned I Love Lucy. Yeah, I know. Everybody hates Chris.

But it's a classic. How many chocolates can she fit in her mouth? So many. There's a new season of Always Sunny, which is on Hulu. The show continues to just be the funniest show in the history of TV. I've still never seen it. I know. It's so...

What's the number one show people tell me to watch? Oh, my God. New season. Every season I go, they can't possibly still be funny, and it's still so funny. What is it, season 15 at this point? I think it's 18, I believe they're up to. What? It is?

It's so good. And then there's a show called Lucky on Apple TV, and that is a great show. Is that? It's about a cool, it's some badass chick who's basically running from the law, a casino. It's all sorts of, it's all my favorite stuff. Is that the girl from the Queen's Big Gambit? Yeah, the ginger. The one with the weird eyes?

Yeah, yeah, the ginger. So anyway, it's a great show. I recommend you check that out as well. I don't know if she's really lucky if she's a ginger. Well, unlucky is what they should call it. But regardless, a great show, and I recommend you check it out. And that's all we've got time for now. We've got to take a break.

We're back in a moment with your Box of Shame. And then we have some other things in store for you after this quick break on K-Rock. K-Rock. Klein Alley Show. The Box of Shame is here. It's a box full of our deepest, darkest, most shameful secrets. Why do we share these with you? We don't know.

I don't know why we started doing this, but it was a stupid thing that we started. I think it's to highlight that everyone makes mistakes, and there are things that we can obviously regret. That's not it. No? That wasn't it. I think it was so that we could make fun of you for something. But now I feel like it's come back. Backfire, because they make fun of you more often.

I know, I know. It is backfired. And I really hate this box of shame. It's backfat-fired for me. It's all backfat. So without any further ado, it's time for your box of shame. The box. What's in the box?

Of shame. Shame. Shame. Shame. All right. This person did the following. Self-pleasured in the bathrooms of K-Rock immediately following the interview

with Alina Obovian. You put that in so quickly. There's numerous people doing it. It's signed by everyone who works here. That's gotta be Wayne, right? Every stall is full. This was signed by all of the employees of Odyssey. L.A. Odyssey.

That's crazy. Wow, that was quick. And CEO Kelly Turner. Wow, careful. All right, here we go. This person. That's not true. I made that up.

Wow. This person's pet woke them up in the middle of the night, so they placed them outside, and then they went missing. Oh. Not me, by the way. I would never do that. It's definitely an Omar thing, 100%. It's got to be Omar.

I wish it was me. It was not me. That's not you, Omar? It's not. I wish. That was me. You lost one of your cats? I lost him for a bit.

Yeah. My kid. What? For how long? Wait, what happened? Until I found the body. Cats don't make noises at all. And the coyotes found them.

We're warned. Wait, wait. Cats don't bark. No, but they meow, and then they play with each other, and then they wake you up, and then they go in the litter box, and they're all loud when they go in the litter box. I don't know why they have to be that loud. They have been waking us up like crazy. It's so effing annoying.

I thought the whole reason people got cats is because they don't make any noise, unless you put a little bell on them. I think it's so you're not as sad when they die. Or when they're in heat. I know they make that weird noise when they're in heat. They hiss and they spray you with whatever that spray is. Yeah, I know. All three of them find different, unique ways to wake us up.

But we've had a problem with it. We've been trying to troubleshoot solutions. We were talking about throwing them in the garage. There's a closet under the stairs situation that we've been trying out. And so at one point, we have one cat that we put in the closet when he starts going. And then the other one... Don't they just get louder? no because it's downstairs i can't hear it with my earplugs but if they're trapped i'm saying i

mean that's like you being annoyed no he knows at this point okay it's my time in the closet he's used to it now that's like you're wearing like a torture chamber over there it's roomy in there there's pillows the other one though is usually the good one and he started meowing and going at it and i was so pissed at that point because i had already been woken up three or four different times and it was that situation client where you're about to fall asleep you're right about to go back to sleep, and then it's a ow! Wakes you up, starts all over again. He's jumping

on me. He's trying to play. You have no dominance in that house, huh? I do. I mean, it sounds like you have none, because they have no respect for your situation. They have respect. They just love me and respect me so much, they want me to play with them. Doesn't one of them pee on all your stuff still? No, you know what the problem is?

No, they're not peeing. It's the fact that I normally get up so early. So on the weekends, when we actually want to sleep in they're up at four in the morning so they are ready to go they want to be fed all that stuff because they're used to my schedule so they want me to wake up they're mad that i'm not awake so your cats which are by the way not outdoor cats right no they're not some people put their cats outside they'll see them three four weeks later no but and our area is it's in the hills so there's there's literally a coyote den like half a mile from our house and we see them all

the time you were like so angry and sleepy that you just put in the backyard well we had talked about the backyard as an option because it's enclosed and we said as long as they don't jump over the fence maybe they would be fine going outside sometimes under supervision so we had talked about it but not done it right you decided let's test this out in my sleep i said you're done and i picked him up i brought him downstairs i opened the just see ali being all angry and i just threw him out there i went right back to sleep and i fell asleep for another hour and a half a blissful hour and a half my wife and kid were not home i think they had already gotten up and left at that point and then i you know good morning text to my wife i said i got so pissed in

the middle of the night or early in the morning i threw milo out into the backyard and she said well where is he i said well i'm gonna go downstairs and get him now i went outside milo gone nothing milo then i'm doing the treat shaking going around shaking the treats milo's nowhere to be found and i don't know what has happened to him and i'm like oh god in this short period of time this blissful hour and a half that i had to sleep he's already been eaten what an idiot this cat has already managed to get eaten by a coyote within an hour and a half of being outside first time ever outside where do you rank this cat uh as far as the favorite to least favorite i mean they're all third oh they're all least favorite oh man no i mean he's great he's

normally the good one and he's kind of a dumb floofy cat where he's kind of always fallen off of furniture he's the funny one right and so i was kind of bummed because he's not not the one that my kid is best friends with but he's kind of mine he's the one that me me and him have the bond if he's dead i'm not sending you another bag of flowers a grocery store bag of flowers my last cat died so i was thinking of you it was a nice ralph's bag right well i didn't know what who love you bath i didn't say i love you bath i said thinking of you back i'm thinking of you yeah i didn't write i love you i went up and down the path i went all around the neighborhood i was going oh my god i've killed my cat because i didn't want him to bother me as i was sleeping

now this is the story and i have to explain this now to my four-year-old that the cat is dead vanessa will do that for you hey i went around for i was even starting to make missing posters i was like i don't know what to do and then i was gonna start posting on some of those websites i felt really guilty for doing this and i couldn't have been held accountable for my decision making at that point finally i checked under the grill cover we had a grill cover that was sitting on the ground bunched up and i picked it up and he was under there sleeping soundly didn't seem bothered by the fact that i was calling his name for hours and hours and it seemed like he was just there the whole time i mean i think paralyzed in fear but still he was there and he hadn't been

eaten by a coyote so all was okay at the end but i did feel bad that i threw him out there the cat's never been outside before this was his first time outside ever and all because you wanted to sleep yeah yeah that's pretty shameful your cat is dying or i believe he's dead now this is just a little cat around your house and it's gone so no big deal cool bye okay there's beautiful A message to the SPCA. You'll save that for when you need it next time on KROQ. That's the Paradox on KROQ, your Klein Alley show. We will get through some takeaways and then your weekend anthem and all that stuff coming up in moments.

First on the GOAT line. All right, this call is just defending Jake. You guys are always on Jake for admitting that he always admits that he's never wrong. But Klein Alley, you two are exactly the same. Alley saying you weren't wrong about the old Spider-Man Legos. Klein saying you weren't wrong about so many things. No example, sir. No specific example.

I can come up with a bunch of times that Jake does this. Allie did not admit the time she was wrong when Marcus Mumford was in here, and she said to him that his wife had an Oscar, and he said, no, she doesn't. And Allie said, yes, she does. And she would not admit that she was wrong. At the time, I was shocked that Chad GBT could be wrong. Now I've learned that Chad GBT is wrong 90% of the time. I would hate to be in a meeting with you guys.

It'd probably have to be the longest meeting. I feel bad for Vanessa and everyone else. And one question for Vanessa, whose house is it? Rob's house. Yeah, don't feel too bad for Vanessa, all right? Trust me, when we're sitting in these meetings, she's doing most of the rambling, and we're sitting around listening. Excuse me, she's doing her job.

Right, no, I get it. That's an important part of the job is a lot of ramble. But I'm just saying, Jake is the one guy here that if he is 100% wrong, will not admit it. What are you talking about? I've never been wrong in my life. Johnny, you want to show him the picture? Johnny went all the way to a thrift store yesterday.

Oh, yes. So yesterday I went to Beacon Video in Burbank, and I went to go compare VHS and Betamax tapes. Now, yesterday on the air, I was talking about how Beta were smaller than VHS tapes. And Jake felt the need to interrupt with a loud, you're wrong, they're bigger, much bigger. And we moved on, and then when we had a lot of people defending on the text line that beta are actually much smaller, Jake then changed his argument to I was talking about the box. Except we're not talking about boxes. We're talking about the actual video.

So Johnny went to an old thrift video store, and he took pictures, Jake. Would you like to see Johnny's? I believe the tapes, yes. But when you went to the video store, what we're talking about, and you went to go rent a video, the Betamax boxes were way bigger. Nobody was talking about the boxes. Yeah, no boxes at all. These are just old tapes, man. Did you take pictures of the boxes, too, Johnny, or just the tapes?

He didn't have the box there. He just had the tape. Oh, yeah, no kidding. Those are too big to store. How did I know this would not be resolved? Typical. So anyway. I don't even, if I search Betamax tape boxes, I can't even get.

I know. The box is just the sleeve that goes around the cassette. And I mean, the Betamax is smaller. We can't do it. That's right, you can't. It's not worth it. It's just not worth it. I just want to play this for Omar

because maybe it's something he can think about this weekend. Hey, I had an idea since Omar is now a Redskins fan. Remember when he was doing those moments of mindfulness? Maybe he could do that with a Native American twist, possibly. Oh, God. I don't know. I just think it'd be kind of funny because he's, you know, kind of racist. Anyways, thanks for listening.

All right, well, he's a fan now of the Washington football team, but he only wants to be a vintage fan, not a modern-day fan. So he's taking a twist on his forced fantasy. I'm going to go get a machete or one of those hatchets. All right, great. It's a great idea. That will not lead to any trouble. Carve an arrowhead.

All right, let's do takeaways from today's show. And then next week we're back. Remember, Wednesday, hopefully you join us. We'll be all hanging out at Descanso again for the Fiesta Siesta. Come for the party, come for the nap. You pick which one you want to do, and we'll do it next week on Wednesday. Oh, my God, what a throwback. We used to play this when we said goodbye.

Aww. We hope you'll join the show. Thank you, my friend. We'll get you in the end. We hope to see you again. All right, takeaways from today's show. What do we got? Two and three, Mike.

Takeaway is that in the apocalypse, Klein's role is going to be a naughty nurse. Yeah, you got to look like a nurse so they don't kill you. Because they need me to sew them up. 925, English is Johnny's subject, and he can write a bunch of yeah and stuff. Yep. 818, hitting yourself. It's hot.

310, cats don't bark. 818, doomsday, Jake Shack beans. Let's see. 626, all you need on a deserted island is a fleshlight. Happy birthday, Zeke. 818, Alina Abovian is an all-you-can-eat boyfay. And 213, my takeaway is it's Friday, bitches. If you don't know what we're talking about, check out The Complete Show, and that will all make sense to you.

Although some of it didn't make sense to me, and I was here for The Complete Show. What's your takeaway there from today's show, Johnny? Omar drags his dog. Omar drags his dog. That's a good takeaway. He loves that dog. You should throw him out in the yard. It's a great trick.

Do you have a takeaway there, Vanessa? Jake lives in a terrarium. Jake, do you have a takeaway? Yeah, Klein is a cigar guy. He has stocks on the weekends. That's right. Don't you forget it. Cigars and stocks.

That's what people know about me. That's my thing. Allie, what are you into? What am I, what? I don't know. What's your takeaway? You are so horny, aren't you? What's your takeaway, I meant to say?

My takeaway is an eight-sided object is a spider. Omar, takeaway? My takeaway is that Klein should be divorced by Monday. All right, great. That's most takeaways on a Friday. Alright guys, here's your weekend song Have a good one, we'll see you on Monday I got gas

I am an asshole Hong Kong Could be a crackhead It's not about that Monday Tuesday No one cares about Wednesday Thursday Forget that voice

Are you ready for the weekend? Are you ready for the weekend? Are you ready for the weekend? Are you ready for the weekend? Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, trash Thursday, Friday, forget about that Friday, Saturday, we're in silence Sunday, sleeping in

Ethan Brunch These are my people, baby Emojin Poots If you want some, come get some Hit the beach or hit the mall See nothing at all Sleep in, watch movies, read books Anything goes, just take a look

Wow, I really regret that last show but it's too late to take it back now it will live forever on the interwebs and potentially in your memories that was the good thing about radio when we started this show it would live in the air and disappear in the moment but now you can hold all these clips against us forever the best thing about radio is that you can picture what we look like without having to see it for reals unfortunately now that has changed yes you can watch us on live stream on k-rock and you can click like subscribe it really helps us out and it's a benefit for you because it'll probably feel better about your own appearance that's what it's all about expensive

plastic surgery or just watching us and looking in the mirror and feeling better. That's what you can do right now as we are on KROQ YouTube, live streaming every morning. If you want to check out part of the show while you're getting ready, then put us on the radio, drive and work, then get to work and avoid your coworkers by listening to us while streaming. There are so many ways for you to embrace the show and every one of those ways helps us. So even if you're leaving for the day, please put the YouTube on, leave it on for your cat, your dog, your hamster. It all helps us on KROQ's YouTube. And anytime you want to see a blind taste test, a beer, or a lie day Friday in person,

you can see it all on the live stream. Really dumb radio bits are best with a visual aid. Unk! Unk! Unk!