Klein/Ally Show: The Podcast - HOUR 1- Klein's Pop-a-Shot, Ally's Workout and MORE

Episode Date: July 24, 2026

About to get into a brand new episode of Klein Alley Show, but first let's tell you about our good friends at the finest airport that ever was and ever will be. The San Bernardino International Airport. Especially when there's summer travel plans, it can get expensive at these airports. That's why you got to go to this airport where parking is just five bucks a day. Plus you got those easy trips, San Francisco or Provo, Utah. Maybe you didn't plan anything this summer. See how easy it is. Don't be one of those people who has to pack your patience. Go to San Bernardino International Airport. Okay, enough shilling. Now it's time to get into a brand new episode of Klein Alley Show. Hey, what's going on, Klein Alley?

Are you ready? I love Klein Alley, you little bitch. Klein Alley, it's just okay. Just don't let Frank's body into that. Good morning, everybody. Hey, what up, Klein Alley? Whoa, sweet David Stank, did you see that? Beautiful Klein Alley Show.

Let's get the show started. The show started. show started we are live in los angeles three two one and here we go oh man i'd have those feet i'm gonna be eggless i like turtles who it's not about that monday tuesday no one cares about wednesday thursday Are you ready for the weekend, are you ready for the rear end, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, trash, Thursday, Friday, forget about that, Friday, Sunday, Wednesday, Sunday, sleep in

it, eat and brunch, spider, spider, spider, mom's a hag, look at her, I got a jug of jizz, Facials Mominender He's been empty every day because he's doing it a lot. Klein Alley Show. Low 6.7. KROQ FM and HD Pasadena. Los Angeles.

Orange County. The Sonic Pulse of Los Angeles. This is the world famous KROQ. Oh, hell yeah. Welcome to your weekend. Good morning. Klein Alley Show. Back in your ear holes where we belong.

I'm Klein. There's Alley. That is Jake the Nerd over there. What's up? DJ Omar Khan. Hey. Postmaster Johnny and Vanessa in the back. We are together again like Captain Planet.

You can interact with the show starting immediately. 800-520-1067. Start listening, start taking notes. As boring as that may sound now, it could result in you winning yourself into a festival taking place on the beaches of Santa Monica, California. A lovely, always beautiful Santa Monica Ocean Way Festival. The Killers, Jack White, Sublime, and more. Always beautiful? What beach are you talking about? Always beautiful. That was sarcasm.

But I think where the festival will be taking place will be a nice part of the beach. I'm sure they'll clear away the used needles. They'll power wash the funk out of there for a little bit. I do feel bad that we are asking people on a Friday. where a lot of times on a Friday, you would like to just phone in your day that we're asking people to whip out a notebook and actually pay attention.

You know how sometimes you get to work and you're like, oh man, today's like a demanding day. So I wasn't really ready for that. Well, when we get those meetings sprung on us on a Friday, then they're like, let's come up with ideas. I'm like, no. We're checked out. Yeah, like I just can't generate that right now.

Summer Friday, a lot of companies, not our company, but a lot of companies have these summer Friday hours where they, people only go in for, I don't think anyone ever goes in anymore, but I think people go in, they go in, go in for like half a day on Fridays and then they get to leave at noon or something. Our summer hours, we had to stay an extra hour.

I know. So, yes, our summer hours are the opposite. We did this all wrong. And then they extended them through the whole year. When I worked at MTV, which was years ago and anyone cared about MTV, they had that summer hours. I couldn't believe, I was blown away.

You did? Yeah, they were like, by the way, it's Friday. Everyone gets to leave at noon. I was like, are you kidding me? What do we have to do for that? Do you think they still do that, though, over there? Probably not, right? I don't think anyone works there anymore.

Oh, it's just completely gone? It's just ridiculousness. That's all it is. It's a Halloween store. It's pure now. It's just a pop-up tent. It's a pop-up tent. Hey.

But at the time, it was a big deal, and everyone was in such a better mood because, kind of similar to our concept of the four-day work week, when you knew Thursday was there, you're like, well, Friday's a nothing. You go in for a couple hours, and then you're done. I feel like Fridays, though, in general, if people leave early, you don't have to check with anyone. You can just leave. I have a friend who has a job who has currently summer Fridays, and he has not told, he's

had this job for years, he has not told his wife he has summer Fridays. What does he do? He just does whatever the hell he wants. He says, she just assumes every day, because he gets home at like 5.36, depending on traffic or whatever, and on Fridays, he's done at noon, and he just says, I'll go to a movie. I think he went and saw that movie last week. The Odyssey? Odyssey, and then I think every Friday, he just does whatever he wants to do.

He has, like, four hours where he's supposedly at work, but he can do whatever he wants. Does he ever slip up and he's like, ah, I hated that movie? I mean, I don't know what you're talking about. It's been three years, I think. He's never mentioned that he has these summer Fridays. He just gets, like, four hours to himself every Friday. How great is that? Well, because if you tell your partner that you have time off, they create a to-do list for you immediately.

Yeah, summer Fridays, here you go. Dry cleaner, grocery store. You should have never told your wife that your kids went to camp. Oh, my God, I know. That's stupid me. Look at all the things you've had to do since then. I've spilled so much stuff. I don't know how to get into it, what I did yesterday.

Yesterday was the dumbest, giant waste, most giant waste of time of my entire life. And it makes me jealous that you have this time off and that you're also wasting it. Get to it next. Hey, Rock. We are the Klein Alley Show. If you need us, 800-520-1067. In moments, a $500 Friday will be here, which means you have the opportunity to take not one, not two, not three, not four, but $500 of Alley's money.

She's pregnant. You should feel bad about it. But also, you should feel pretty great if you get $500 additional to start your weekend. Nah, I don't feel bad. equality. All you have to do is answer some questions about stuff happening in the news. Yo, I thought Klein was a bad parent for telling his kids what he was going to do

to his mom. And then after hearing Ali... Not my mom, to my wife. I was going to do them to their mom. Not my mom. That's weird. Good clarification. I was going to turn their mom into a balloon animal. Basically teach her kid how to shoplift. That's actually kind of crazy. I can't tell

who the worst parent is. I think you guys should have your kids fight each other to find out who the worst parent is. Alright? Happy Friday. Well, I think if we agreed to let our kids fight each other, that would make us both the worst parents. Oh, and I would never agree to that because your bruiser would kick my kid's ass. Kick your little tutu-wearing son's ass. He doesn't wear a tutu.

It's a leotard. And now he has a mouth guard and he's playing flat football and he got a touchdown, okay? The fact that you say he doesn't wear a tutu, it's a leotard, is the funniest argument ever. It's a bright orange leotard. Yesterday, I tried to not be a bad parent because I built. I'm not good at building stuff, but I attempt to do it anyway. And usually, yes, there's extra pieces at the end. And every once in a while, I'll have to call a task rabbit to help me finish it.

But yesterday, I decided to build something all by myself. And like a stupid, dumb idiot, I'm not good at measurements. And so I built this entire thing, which was a pop-a-shot thing. Basketball thing? Basketball thing. Oh, wow. That's fun. Well, I thought it was going to be fun.

Is it one of those flimsy-ass ones, though, that's like... It's not the great one you'd find at, like, a Chuck E. Cheese. I'll put it that way. It's the one where, like, the sides are just, like, canvas material. Yes. How much was it? Was it cheap? Under $200.

Oh, okay. Well, that's decent. Somewhere between $150, and there was a digital coupon, so I want to say it was actually closer to $150, but regardless, the thing came in a million pieces. Like, you think to yourself, all right, I see what this looks like put together. Is this like going to be snapping together five things or a thousand things? And this was a thousand things, but I did it because it was, you know, trying to get it done.

So a big surprise for my kids. I thought they would, that was my way of earning their love and respect. Well, surprise for one kid, right? Only one kid cares about that. That's right. The better one. And I built the thing, took me hours. And when I finally pulled it apart, you know, you have to, at the end, you extend it.

It did not fit. There was no, it was, there was nowhere to stand to shoot the basket. It went wall to wall. There was nowhere to stand. Oh, so there's not another place you can put it? No other place to put it. Nope, unless I put it right in the middle of the living room. Yeah, put it in your living room.

No other place to put it. Put it in your garage. It's a great garage thing. After I said this to my wife, I said, this thing is going to be too big. I said that from the very beginning. She said, no, she's going to love it. It's going to be the greatest thing ever. Is it going in her room?

That was the thought was to put it in her room. And I said, there's nowhere to put it in her room. This is a papa shot. The room is a bed. Right, you need to be able to, you have room to pop. Right, so I built the thing, and then as soon as I showed her how big it was, she goes, you're right, take it apart, let's send it back. Wait, you didn't decide to do the measurements ahead of time? Well, I did the measurements, but the measurements I looked at were for when it was folded up, not when it was unfolded.

And that's a totally different thing, apparently. Yes, it's very different. It's a difference between 40 inches and 80 inches, Allie. Oh, 80 inches is big. That's a massive difference. Oh my God. So, if you think you wasted any of your day yesterday to build this thing, which took me, I mean, and it was hot, too. It was hot, sweating.

I felt like a real man. I was putting those stupid little wrenches that they said. You're putting it together indoors, though, right? I'm putting it together indoors, but I'm sitting, you know, no air conditioning. I got a window black. I'm right in a window. I'm getting cooked. Oh, you still have no air conditioning?

Sweating. I just didn't turn it on. I was too lazy to walk over and turn it on. And I built this whole effing thing. And I go, finally, it looks good. I was about to start inflating the balls, start shooting one, and I stretch it out, and I go, well, this ain't fitting here. And so she goes, yeah, you're right. Let's send it back.

So I sat that back down and took it apart piece by piece. Oh, my God. And, of course, you can't fit all that stuff back in the box it came in. Oh, no, it's impossible. It's like putting a tent back in its original bag. So I'm going to send them back half the pieces. So you have to ship it back? You have to ship it back.

You have to ship it back. Can I have it? You know what? I'll sell it to you. It's 80 inches? Yeah, that is big. 80 inches. 80 inches.

I would put that. It is. If I bought it off you for half the price, would you take that? It's funny. I started to go through the process of returning it on Amazon, and they go, what's the reason? And then I wrote, doesn't fit. And they go, all right, you have to pay to ship it back. And the shipping back was the same thing.

It was cost as much. And then I went back, and I changed my answer to inaccurate website description. I know. Now, when you make those selections, you're like, hmm, what? And then it goes, and then it goes, all right, we'll pay for the shipping now. Cool. All right, phew, thank God. So we've got to take a break.

We're back in a second. If you want Allie's money, I recommend you call right now, 800-520-1067. You could buy up to three Papa Shots if you take Allie's money today. Yeah. Think of all the Papa Shots you could be having in your house. Just surrounded by Papa Shots. Non-stop. The number to call is 800-520-1067.

There's five questions all about the news. We'll come back with that after this on a $500 Friday next. Just a regular Friday right now, but it's about to turn into a $500 Friday for someone. And all you have to do is be on the phone and ready to answer some questions about stuff happening in the news. This is all technically news. And if you do better than Allie, who will attempt to stand in your way, you get no money. It's getting easier for me to stand in your way. She is in your way regardless if she's trying to or not.

So she is setting a pick and roll everywhere she goes. And the reality is all you need to do is be on the phone, answer questions about things happening in the world. Do better than Allie as she sequesters herself outside in the hallway. Okay. And if you do better than Allie does, well, then she will be forced to give you $500. If for some reason you lose, you get no money, but you will get yourself a limited edition piece of Klein Allie Show merch, which could be one of them shirts that says, I've never been intimate with Jake, which is a very in-demand item. It could be one of the 323 Tip Bully hats, the Sweet Dibbets hats, or the Make Allie Fat Again Maffa hats, or Maffa hats, depending on how you say it.

So all could be yours. We say good morning right now to, wow, this is going to be interesting, another Allie. This is an Allie on Allie battle from Huntington Beach, California. Good morning, Allie. Good morning. God, I hope you win. This will be great. I don't know if Allie in the history of Allie Knows the News has ever battled another Allie.

So the opportunity to take her down at her own game, and someone will have to say Allie Knows the News. It's going to be great. I hope it's our Allie that says it, and you win the money. So get ready. Questions are ready. Here we go. Answer these quickly, confidently, and accurately. Let's go.

Allie Knows the News. Question number one. Which professional team was at the White House yesterday where they were called by the president, quote, one of the great brands anywhere in the world? The Dodgers. The Dodgers. We got a question number two. Good news, L.A. That's sarcasm.

This has increased 3.4% since it was last calculated. What is up 3.4% in Los Angeles? Unemployment. We go to question number three. Update on Jackie the bald eagle, the big bear eagle. Everyone's been sending thoughts and prayers to Jackie, who is improving, but Jackie's condition is currently considered in what? Sorry, that's a terribly worded question.

But Jackie's condition is currently what? Critical? Critical. We go to question number four. Burger King is now guaranteeing one specific menu item, saying if you're not happy, The next one will be free. What are they putting a Burger King guarantee on? Whopper?

And finally, question number five. One of the finest performers ever, Weird Al Yankovic, turned down a seven-figure offer to perform where? Because he said it felt icky. Where did he refuse to perform, even though he was offered over a million dollars? The Madison Square Garden. Madison Square Garden.

I get it. That place is icky. That's right. All right, let's bring Allie in. We'll score it together. Our Allie is entering the studio. That's a different Allie on the phone. Money's up for grabs.

Bragging rights up for grabs. Limited edition merch up for grabs. And hopefully, if you're just listening, driving around, you're going to learn something about the world. Allie, question one. Yes, hello. Oh, by the way, I should point out, you're playing another Allie on the phone right now. It's an Allie Allie battle. Oh, man.

Now I don't know what to think. They're taking down their own type. Question one. Which professional sports team was at the White House yesterday where they were called by the president, quote, one of the great brands anywhere in the world? Yeah, I believe that would be the Dodgers. Okay. It was the Dodgers. And interesting because I think of the Dodgers as a team.

I think of them, I don't really, I mean, they are a brand, but it's just such a strange way to refer to them. It's a very business-y way to say it. Very business-y way to say it. But congratulations, both of you got that. So we are now tied up at one as we go to question number two. Good news, LA, and that's sarcastic. This has increased 3.4% since it was last calculated. That would be homelessness, Klein.

Okay, she said unemployment, which feels like it's so close, but the correct answer is homelessness. They could have something to do with each other. Millions and millions and millions of dollars. Billions. Billions spent to keep this number from increasing, yet it keeps on going up, up, up, and Allie gets the point. And goes up 2-1 on Other Alley.

And we go to question number three. Jackie the Bald Eagle. Getting a lot of attention. Apparently condition improving, but what is Jackie the Bald Eagle's current condition listed as? She's still in critical condition, I believe. She said critical as well. It's weird to hear improving but still critical because I thought once you're improving... They gave her a blood transfusion.

Wow, that's crazy. I know, crazy that they can do that on an eagle. But once they go critical, I thought then they'd go too serious or something else. But they're staying in critical. Still critical. Still critical, yeah. Allie got that and Allie got that. So both of you still fighting it out here.

Our Allie is up one still with two questions left. Burger King is guaranteeing one of their menu items. And they're saying if you're not happy with this item, the next one will be free. What is the guarantee now happening from Burger King? uh god no diarrhea a no diarrhea guarantee that would be very on that listen that's a ballsy thing to do but i'm telling you trying to make a statement right now right so ali claims that they are guaranteeing that if you get diarrhea you'll get you'll get a free diarrhea okay uh that is not right i'll tell you who got it right i forget it's like you forget you're playing for

500 here ali on the phone said the whopper guarantee and that is the correct answer Wait, they're guaranteeing what? They're guaranteeing that if you're not satisfied with your Whopper, your next one will be free. It's a Whopper guarantee. That's sick. Big news. Just came out in the last 24 hours. Even if you were satisfied with your Whopper, why didn't you just say that you were unsatisfied so you can get another Whopper?

Well, people will probably do that. And they probably don't care. They're just trying to get people to go to Burger King. But for a while, when they were trying to say they had better fries than McDonald's, they did this whole fry guarantee situation. They're trying too hard. It's a little thirsty. But anyway, that is the correct answer. Allie on the phone, so now it's all

tied up. Going into this final question. Weird Al Yankovic, one of the finest performers that ever was and ever will be, apparently turned down a seven-figure offer to perform somewhere because he said it was, quote, icky. Where did he

refuse to perform because he said it felt icky, even though he was offered seven figures? Maybe he was asked to perform at that 250th White House celebration. at the White House? That's your guess. He claims that he was asked to perform

at the Saudi Arabia Comedy Festival. Oh, yes. I remember that. Everybody was performing at that. I didn't need to take that amount of money because it made me feel icky is what it did. So he turned it down. No point for you.

Sadly, our contestant, Ali, guessed that it was Madison Square Garden. So she's also wrong. So now we find ourselves and one of these very unsatisfying ties. And it's $500, and, you know, ties usually go to the house. But if we must, I mean, if this is going to come down to a tiebreaker situation. I mean, it's an alley-on-alley battle.

I feel like it's a good way to end it on a fair note. Ties just kind of feel, especially on a $500 Friday. All right, it's an alley-off. First one. She's probably way hotter than me, too. Most alleys are attractive. Oh, my God. I met one in Hawaii.

Aisha worked at the snorkel store. Hi, I'm Allie. I'm like, of course you are. You're gorgeous. Well, the whole reason we hired you for this thing is because we heard your name, and then you showed up, and we go, oh, good God. Oh, my God. They don't spell it the same, usually, the hot ones.

Here is your question, guys. This booze brand is launching its own line of sneakers that can hold up to four shots of the booze in the sneaker. can anyone answer this question this booze brand is launching its own line of sneakers it can hold up to four shots of the booze

in the actual sneaker it's gotta be a vodka brand um I'm gonna go I'm gonna go with Smirnoff that is incorrect Patron is also wrong so we're back to it

Fireball Oh, five of all. That makes sense. All right. Well, sadly, this alley-off came to an end, and we're going to call this thing a tie, which means you get no money, but you do get a limited edition piece of merch. And what must you shamefully admit? Both of you at the same time on KROQ.

Go ahead. I'm Allie. I'm Allie from the Huntington Beach. And Allie knows the news. It's a great mood. Hopefully, you're paying attention to today's show, so we can send you to Santa Monica Oceanway Festival, and you can see some Jack White and some Killers and some Sublime and many others.

That'll be coming up. And if you want to go to Universal Studios Hollywood, we have those tickets for you as well coming up next hour right here on KROQ. What do you think is the most embarrassing thing that can happen to you at the gym? There are a lot of ways you can embarrass yourself at the gym, but I think there's one top most embarrassing thing. Lifting a weight that's not that heavy and like you need someone to come out. You need like someone to come save you. Or you bench press and you can't get the press part. And there's like there's no plates on the, it's just the bar, sir.

And you're like, I know, but someone help me lift it. Have you had to use assistants to carry the bar? Not for the bar only, but there's definitely times where there's not a lot of weight. Like, in my mind, I'm like, I think this thing must be, like, 500 pounds, and it's, like, barely over 100. And, like, I had one of those, like, big, like, real. One time, a woman had to come and help me at the gym. That was really embarrassing, too, because I couldn't lift. What did she?

No, you couldn't lift it? Yeah, she had to, like, help me lift. I was set up badly on the bench, and it was, my elbows were, like, too close, and I couldn't, like, trap them. The woman was me, and it was me trying to help climb. That's such a great walk of shame, where you put weights on a bar, then you sit down to do the thing, and then you have to get back up and take the weight off because you realize there's too much. That's pretty embarrassing.

And you hope that no one saw that. You almost pretend like you just did like three sets. You're like, anyway, I just did one rep like that. I would say beyond that, though, one of the more embarrassing things a person can do is have a run-in with the treadmill. What do you mean a run-in with the treadmill? Like an oopsie with the treadmill.

You fall off, you trip. You do that thing where you do that sprint, but it's going too fast, and you have to like jump off and abandon ship. Yeah, that's funny. Yeah, why don't you be able to fall off a treadmill is always a good, that's a good laugh. So I had an incident with the treadmill yesterday. I went down to the gym in this building after we had had our show meeting and binged on a bunch of chips and cheesies that a listener had sent us.

I felt like I could just feel the bloat beginning. I was like, I got to get on a treadmill and do something. So I went down there. Oh yeah, Triple Cody sent us a big box of chips from Canada. I know, and Klein's like, we're going to wait and taste test these later. I was like, open. Yeah, so funny. I'm not waiting.

Fat Allie was like, she was in rare form yesterday. Oh, my God. I was starving. We got this box, all these chips that aren't available in America. He went to Canada or something, so he sent us a bunch of them, some interesting flavors. And we're like, great, let's hold on to these. And Allie's like, go open them now. These are called Cheezies, and they're going in my mouth.

Yeah, Allie goes, pass me the Cheezies. I mean, it was unbelievable. It was like Godzilla had attacked our office. I went down there. I did my little warm-up where I was kind of jogging. You felt that bad about the chips you ate? I had planned on going anyway, but I was anxious to get down there because I just started feeling bad. So I started kind of doing this slow jog, and I don't go down to this gym very often.

I usually go to my place at the YMCA by my house. Name drop. I'm doing my little, well, I love the YMCA, shout out. I decide I'm done with the warm-up, and I press the stop button on the screen, and I did not realize that the treadmills down there, they don't just gradually slow down. They stop, like, pretty immediately. And I was not anticipating that.

And, of course, like everyone else at the gym, I'm watching a screen. I'm watching something on my phone. I'm not really paying attention. And I'm expecting to go to a walk and then eventually go to get to a stop. Why would you expect that? Every treadmill on the planet, when you hit the word stop, when you hit stop, stops instantly. No, no, no.

None of them slow down. If you pull that, like, emergency cord. Yeah, Omar's right. It's a giant red safety button. Because if you wanted to cool down, you would have hit the button that says cool down. But I didn't pull the red safety button thing or like that little emergency tab. You could either do that, and then that stops it immediately, or you hit stop, because stop means stop. Stop means stop.

Yeah, but they have to know that stop, you're already running. You can't just completely, no one can just completely stop. Again, it's an emergency kind of feature for all treadmills. Well, in this case, it created an emergency. Because if your shoelace is stuck in the thing, you know, there's a million reasons why stop means stop. If you want it, I can give you three reasons that most people would use if they wanted to slow down gradually. There's a cool-down button. There's those arrows.

You just push the arrows. Or the number two. I can't press the arrows like that when I'm running. It's like, and I feel like I missed the arrow. Well, then just press the number two to slow you down to two. All right. I press stop because I'm done. Okay.

And at the treadmill where I usually go, it is a gradual slowdown when I press stop. You press stop and the treadmill stopped. And that was surprising to you. You press the stop button and it stopped. It stopped so suddenly, Klein. And I fell down because I wasn't expecting it to stop that suddenly. And then a security guard walked into the fitness center and said, ma'am. The whole building shook, ma'am.

And everyone was on an earthquake evacuation from the building. They called every single floor had to be evacuated of this giant building. The foundation was cracked. He said, are you okay? And I said, yeah, I'm sorry. I'm fine. And he said, I saw you from down the hall and I ran over here because I wanted to help you. And meanwhile, there are other people in the fitness center seeing this.

And I said, no. And then I had to explain to him, I'm okay, but I pressed stop. I didn't think that it was going to stop so quickly, and it just caught me off guard, and I fell down. And he said, okay, I just wanted to make sure there was nothing wrong with the treadmill. He's checking on the treadmill. That's one of the very nice treadmills we bought here. Like, he wanted to make sure it wasn't malfunctioning or something. He had to put that out-of-order sign on it.

Oh, right. And I said, no, the treadmill's working fine. I just didn't, I'm not used to this treadmill. I explained all this to him. Did he put the out-of-order sign on you? That would be great. And then he said, are you sure you're okay? Because I can write a report.

He was going to write an injury report for me. That would have been great. I said, no, I don't need an injury report. No, you assaulted a treadmill. Stop, stop, stop. I'm going to write an injury report for the treadmill. And so then all this is going on. People kind of stopped their workouts now, making sure that, like, the idiot is okay.

And then finally he leaves. And now I'm recovering from this. I got a bruised knee. I continue with my workout. And then later, 10 minutes later, there's some kind of an office tour going on where they parade all these new people around the gym and they're watching me work out. It was so embarrassing. Too bad they didn't get to watch you fall off the treadmill. I know.

Hey, Johnny, is there surveillance footage in that gym? There must be, right? They have cameras. Yeah, let me go ask my buddy Marquise and see if he could send us that footage. Yeah, get the footage of Allie falling off the treadmill. Can you do me a solid Marquise and not do that? Yeah, yeah. Oh, please get us the footage of Allie falling off the treadmill.

I'm going to DM them right now. Yeah, they have to have cameras now. I would imagine there's cameras everywhere. It's probably not as bad as it felt. Well, we'll be the judge of that. I'm sure it would look probably just like a little trip. You went full down? I don't think I went full down.

I think it was one of those things where you're walking and then you stop and do this tumble. If a guy came all the way in to check on you to fill out a report, that's a pretty big fall. I was doing my stretching and then he walked up to me. I couldn't believe that he came to my aid in that way. What a good security guard. It looks like you fell on your face. Terribly. Oh, no, my face is fine, sir.

Poor floor. Do I need to get it cleaned? All right, well, that's our new mission now to find this footage. So hopefully we'll be releasing that later today. If you're not following along, you could do that at Klein Alley Show. We'll be right back after this quick break. I recommend you don't miss a minute of the show because you don't know what moment you could miss. You could even miss this.

And now it's time for a moment with Kevin. We're about to find out how long we should be living for. Well, let me start that again. That came out all backwards. I think you've got another two weeks. That was A Moment with Kevin. It's a good question, 714. Julia Wolf is the name of that performer in my room on KROQ,

where you're a Klein Alley show. And if you need us, you can interact on the text line. You can call. The number's the same, 800-520-1067 or 323-TIP-BOLY if you'd prefer. Also, coming up next hour, we'll get you into Universal Studios Hollywood so you can ride the new Fast and Furious roller coaster and everything else that's going on there at Universal Studios. Get one of them giant Simpsons donuts.

The choice is yours when you go to Universal with four one-day tickets. So be ready to win them from us coming up next hour on KROQ, and then we get you into that festival in Santa Monica later this morning. It is news time now. Lucky us. We've got news that a brand-new hour of the show can begin. Grab your Adderall. It's time for ADD News.

If there was ever a time to watch the Jackie and Shadow Bald Eagle live cam, Now is the time because the drama has been heating up. Jackie, still in that little bird hospital. She's in critical condition, but she just got a blood transfusion. So they're working on it. They say she's still highly anemic. She's having issues with her kidneys. But meanwhile...

How old is Jackie? She is 14. And eagles live between 20 and 25 years in the wild on average. So maybe it could be age-related. They're not really sure yet. But Shadow is still in the nest bringing food to the eaglets. The eaglets are still there, even though they've been able to fly for a while now. It's just proof that kids just stay home longer than ever these days.

I mean, Rent's crazy. Huh? He said, Rent's crazy right now. Yeah. What does he say? I don't know what he's saying. He said, Rent is crazy right now. Oh, God.

I'm so glad I know now what he said. I asked everyone on the show what percentage of Jake's jokes on the air they found funny. and the numbers were staggering. Staggering high, right? No. What did Vanessa say initially? 5%. Vanessa said 5%.

Jake, I just want you to know you're not my type of funny. I don't think we are either. Facts. Like what percentage of the show do you think is funny? I want to say 50-50. 50-50.

I'll take that. That's okay. It's not bad. I mean, if you think about most of the stuff we have to do, it's a lot of giving away this, giving away that. But we don't really 50% of the time.

50-50. If we're 50% and Jake's 5%, I mean, he is bringing down the average. Let's put it that way. Yeah, so it would have been 55%. Johnny, what percentage of the things Jake says do you find? He's trying to get the video of Ali. Oh, good. That's a priority.

So, Shadow is now being seen with another female bald eagle. Brent's crazy. Dating is crazy. I'm going to say it so no one can understand it. And then I'll stop the show three times. So this homewrecker Hobag eagle has entered the picture And they've seen them perching together

Stop it Yeah and they think that this might be This is the twist They think it might be the same girl eagle That was fighting with Jackie So I know This is like she was out to steal him From the beginning potentially right

So she goes I gotta take Jackie out of the equation Jackie's getting weak I gotta bitch slap her Send her away And then I'll start perching near the nest and kind of stake my claim. She wants to be Eagle Cam famous. She wants to be the next girl in Shadow's life.

But they say, this is what the experts say, they say that Shadow will not cheat and that he has an extraordinary bond with Jackie and it is unlikely he will move on for now. Yeah, right. For now. How long are you giving him? I mean, if she's not...

Well, I'll tell you how long, because once December hits, that's when he starts getting all horny and wanting to screw another Eagle. December? I was thinking like 3 p.m. today. Well, they say that he will be loyal until it's like time to meet. And if she's not around by then, he may find somebody else.

So the one's just flapping around, showing off the goods. Yeah, exactly. So if it's December and Jackie's not back and she's been there perching, you know, it's the easiest swap. Get some strain. What if Jackie can't totally fulfill Shadow? Like Jackie comes back, can't fulfill totally what Shadow needs. Can there possibly be a throuple situation here? You know, that's a great, great idea.

I don't know. Because what if Jackie, what if he does smash? And what if he does link up with this new eagle? And this is a younger eagle. Yeah. And then Jackie comes back and is like, what the hell's going on? You're with my kids. You're with my husband.

It is going to be. Hey, Vanessa, you were in that throuple for a bit. Oh, my God. My friends that I hang out with are a couple. Right. But weren't you going on dates with them and they were paying for you? They just pay for me because they like to. Right.

That's definitely how it works usually. I think I have two. Just because I love you. I got it. But do you think that this eagle situation can survive in throuple as a throuple? Definitely not. Well, they say that they mate for life, you know, that they don't really like find other mates. But, you know, dating is getting hard in the regular world, and it's probably getting tough in the animal kingdom, too.

I would imagine. It's 2026. There's a lot of new rules. So there's a new problem in Boyle Heights, and I feel so bad for these people in this neighborhood because ever since that fire happened at the cold storage warehouse, they've dealt with, like, at first it was air quality, then it was the ash raining down, then it was all the food rotting smell, and then now it's the rats that have come in to eat all the rotting food. And now we have the next phase of it, which is a giant fly infestation. And these flies could carry disease. And these are a specific type of fly. So listen to what these can do to the poor community of Boyle Heights.

Green bottle flies on the lineage property are dangerous and breed quickly in a heat wave and spread to neighborhoods. Green bottle flies can cause myiasis, which is an infectious disease caused by the flies laying eggs in open wounds of either humans or animals. This disease can cause irritation, ulcers, and in some cases, even death. With a number of flies around the property, it would not be uncommon for anyone in the area with an opened wound to contract myiasis. I mean, what the F? Like, at what point would you be like, I need to move? Like, when is this going to get better? I mean, this is going to...

Like eggs. I'm going to like eggs for your myiasis. That's terrible. How would you like to live in Batman's mansion for the low, low price of $32 million? Is that in Pasadena? Yeah, it is. Batman's Wayne Manor is now on the market. This was Bruce Wayne's mansion in the original series with Adam West in the 60s.

So it's not a new mansion per se, but it was also in Stand By Me, Rush Hour, Bridesmaids, and Murder, She Wrote. It's a 19,000 square foot house with seven bedrooms, 11 bathrooms. It's a 17th century castle. It's got leaded glass windows. So you got that sweet lead stuff from back in the day. And it's got a massive home theater. But they do say if you can't afford to buy this property, it will cost between $300,000 and $600,000 a year just to maintain it because it's so old. $306,000? That's not a lot.

Yeah, $300,000 to $600,000 a year. Oh, that's a lot more. That's a lot more money. So even if you buy it, you'd need that much more additional just to keep the upkeep? Just with upkeep. Exactly. Well, as Jake said earlier, the rent, huh? Rent's crazy.

Rent's crazy. Rent's crazy. That's funny now because it's full circle on that joke. Is this 50% funny? It's 50%. Someone said on the text line they give Jake 3% funny, so it's moving down. It's K-Rock.