Klein/Ally Show: The Podcast - HOUR 2- Clickbait, Dadlutions and MORE

Episode Date: June 16, 2026

New episode of Klein Alley Show is about to begin, but before that can happen, Alley, let's tell the people what they need to know. You mean about San Bernardino International Airport? Of course I'm talking about the San Bernardino International Airport. Easy, close, and not LAX. And parking is always just five bucks a day, which means it is El Cheapo approved. Fly nonstop to Provo, Utah for all the skiing, snowboarding, or wives you can handle. And of course you can fly into my hometown of San Francisco, San Bernardino International Airport, when airports smell great. H.D. Pasadena, Los Angeles, Orange County. The Sonic Pulse of Los Angeles.

This is the world famous K-Rock. By the way, the chair alley is sitting in right now in the K-Rock studios. We're going to go ahead and start a speed auction. Currently start the bidding at $1, and we'll see what we get that up to. This thing came with a bunch of stains already, and there it is. You can see what it looks like. Looks like there's an indentation of my ass. Yep. So if whoever collects these chairs, maybe you want this one to your collection right now.

We will go ahead and give that away. This is probably some of my breakfast from days past. Great. Crumbs. Mystery stains that will never come out. It's a one of one, guys. One of one. Hey, you're on the phone. You want Allie's chair? Hi. Hey, Allie. It's me. Long time.

Get out of here. You're going to break the chair, you bitch. That's Fat Allie calling back twice in one day. It's unbelievable. I wonder if people would want it more with Fat Alley or Skiddy Alley. I think no one would want it more. I mean, the chair deserves a raise, clearly, when Fat Alley reenters the studio. It's going to get a lower. If you would like to join us this hour, remember these numbers. You'll need them, 800-520-1067.

We have lots and lots to get to this hour and lots to give you as well. Giant TVs and giant piles of meat in your future. This is the theme for the hour as we get ready for Father's Day on Sunday. We'll be talking about your dadlutions. These are solutions to problems that dads came up with. either because of laziness or because maybe there's some secret genius to it where they don't believe in solving the problem the right way. They solve the problem the dad way.

Well, you've, I'm sure, done this millions of times with your kids. Of course. Of course. I can't think of any examples right now, but I do know in the time, like, when I solve a problem, I immediately am told by my wife that all I did was make the problem worse. And I said, I solved this problem. This is now something you can cross off that nonstop, never-ending list you have in your brain of things we have to deal with

because it's been taken care of. And it's been taken care of creatively. Right. I admire the creativity of dads solving problems. But you didn't get them a backpack. You just used duct tape and Ziploc bags. I'm like, yep, that's right. We solved it.

It's that old Ikea bag. It never stops becoming useful. So this hour, we will hear some stories about dadlutions, either that your dad used on you or that you as a father used. And someone will leave here with a giant 75-inch TCL TV sound bar and $100 to buy all that meat. 562 said they'll buy my chair for $100. Well, that's probably going to be a winning bid right there. They're legitimate, so get ready for your chair. It's KROQ.

Time for us to solve some of the Internet's biggest riddles. Internet design, two reasons and two reasons only. Clickbait, masturbate. We can only do one of them on the radio. It's time for Clickbait. A lot of these things, you know, they force you to... You must click. You need answers. Your brain must get the answers.

And according to the internet this week, there is one thing that you should be doing if you are nervous about going on a first date. And one thing you can do to instantly calm your nerves before you go on that date. And now this is backed by research, science, and this has just been released in the last 24 hours. Allie, what do you think it is? I think before you go on a date, you need to eat. Even if you're going to dinner, I don't think you should go on a first date hungry, just like you shouldn't go to a grocery store when you're starving because you're not going to make good decisions

and you're just going to make an ass out of your choices. You've got to eat a decent meal before you go out so that you don't act a fool and focus more on the eating part than the date part. A lot of people think to themselves, I'm not going to eat anything. I've got a date coming up. It's going to cost me money anyway. I might as well just eat there. But the idea that you go in already full means you can focus on more important things.

Exactly. And then you're not worried about the menu. You're not thinking about, oh, what do I want to order? Because that part is already done. As Jake said, that way you can put all your energy on knocking the back out that poonanny. Right, Jake? Knock the back out that poonanny. Ba-na-na-na.

Ba-na-na. That's the point. You can't do that if you're thinking about ordering mozzie sticks the whole time. And when you're hungry, you just do dumb stuff. You just got to make an effort. All right, Allie says eat. Eat before the date. Jake, I know that you are.

He has a pre-date ritual. Single? What is this? Oh, he dumps out. Nervous poops. Yeah, what do you do? You do a couple different things, don't you? I'm just so lucky to have one.

I don't know if I have a ritual. I thought you said you would, like, drink one beer, poop. He has the shower beer. That's just every day. Oh, okay. That's just a normal day. That's a pre-day ritual, not date. Got it.

What do you think it is, Jake? I do think it's having, like, a shot. Like a shot of a tequila or whatever just to get loose and, like, you know, comfortable and willing to share whatever else. Make sure you smell like whiskey when you meet her. I can see why that would be potentially a red flag. You show up and the person that you're meeting for the first time already smells of booze, but I guess...

It's a shot. No, I know. That's the thing you can tell that person. It was just a shot. But if they go give you a hug or whatever... Wait, are we prude? And they go, I'm just saying that I could see why that would be potentially... I mean, he showed up stinking like whiskey.

Yeah, I know. You got to make sure that you brush your teeth or something to make sure. You got to go with something like vodka. It doesn't smell to it. Yeah, I know. Omar, this is the pre-date ritual that should keep you from being too nervous if you've got those pre-date, first-date jitters. Is this pertaining to both men and ladies?

Yes. Same thing, huh? Because I was going to say masturbating for dudes. I mean, that'll put you right at ease, and then you kind of bleed the lines, and then you aren't going to be over-sexified. You know what I mean? May cancel the date altogether. You got that out of the chamber.

I don't think that's going to be it for the ladies, though. So I'm just going to go with, yeah, you just got to dump out before the date. I think if you dump out, you're going to feel a little lighter, a little looser. And, yeah, you're just going to have generally a better time. How do you do that? How do you just control when you do it? Omar says dump out. Ali says eat before.

And Jake says shot of vodka. You should have gone with the original gut, Omar, because according to this new research, masturbate. It calms the nerves, slows down the thought process as you become aroused. the brain releases dopamine and endorphins which give you the I've got this motivation and confident energy. And I don't know, to be completely

honest. You think ladies are doing that? As you're putting away the lotion and Kleenex box, you go, I got this. Obviously there was that iconic scene from something about Mary where that was like a known thing and that was Ben Stiller. I'm going to buy his chair now because of that scene. Yeah, nice.

The thought would be, right, are they talking about to completion or are they talking about like... No, absolutely the completion. You don't think they're talking about edging yourself before the date? Yeah, you would be a weirdo, completely jacked the entire date. You want to go all the way so that you're

calm. I guess if you give off those vibes of I don't really care at all if there's anything that happens, those vibes are probably much more... I already had sex with myself. I don't need you. You should see what I'm doing in the parking lot. I knocked the back out of my boonah.

No, no, no, no, no. All right, moving on. And apparently that is for both genders. Oh, cool. I would never think to do that before a date. Right. You just think about it while you're driving home. Yep.

Which is very different. All right, moving on. Next one. Bye. A new study reveals this is now the sweet spot, the amount of sleep you should be getting for healthy aging. Now, it does feel like every week, yes, there is a new report about how much sleep you should be getting.

And it constantly seems like it's shifting. Oh, the sweet spot is eight hours. Anything less is no good. Oh, you don't want to get more than this or it's too much. Then it was like 6.8 hours. Right. Everything's been shifting, but I guess they're focusing now on if you want to age in a healthy way, whatever the hell that means, this is how much sleep you really should be getting. There's a new sweet spot.

It's a slight range, but somewhere between these numbers, that's what you should be getting. Every night, anything less or anything more is killing you. It's got to be between. That sounds like a sweet spot. That's not a sweet spot. That is a problem spot. between 6 1⁄2 and 7 1⁄2. All right, Allie says 6 1⁄2 to 7 1⁄2 is her number.

DJ Omar Khan, who, by the way, lives most of his life on four hours of sleep. Yeah, yeah, four to five for sure. I am going to say that I think for a long time we've been hearing anywhere between 7 and 8, but I think if you want to live longer or age healthy, we're going to go another extra hour. I'm going to say 9.

Wow. 9 hours. 9 is a lot. It is. Jake the Nerd. 12. Spends most of his day. That's Jake's day.

That's how you age. Perfectly. Listen, I saw Jake's driver's license picture from when he first came to L.A. over 20 years ago. He looks almost the same in the face, which is incredible. Well, he does 12 hours collectively. Yes, not in one long stretch. Yeah, he does one long nap and then one long sleep. Right, he'll do like a six-hour nap and a six-hour sleep or something like that, which is incredible.

Oh, lucky. All right, no one's... Well, Ali, you know what? You are the closest because the optimal sleep range... They say if you want to actually age in a healthy way, it's between 6.4 and 7.8 hours per night in one long stretch. So not even eight hours. Do not split it up. Anything over that, bad.

But the magic number is somewhere between that 6.4 and 7.8. Some people can sleep for so long. You know, Sluggo was telling me he slept for a full 24 hours once. That's incredible. He slept a whole day. That's incredible. I can't tell if that does more. I mean, he was probably up for a week, though.

Yeah, he probably was, but he's like, yeah, I'm going back to bed. I do remember after a long trip to Vegas where if you didn't have anything you had to do and you didn't have any kids to take care of, there was the ability to kind of do that. I'm just going to sleep. I'll see you in a couple of days. That was a great recovery period.

I don't know if I've ever done that. If I did, it was because I was intensely hungover. Last one. Here we go. Clickbait. The most successful people in the world Are willing to do this one Extremely uncomfortable thing If you want to be one of the most successful people

In the world You have to do this Incredibly uncomfortable thing It's probably workout as soon as you wake up Like something active Workout first thing in the morning If you want to be one of the world's most successful people You must be willing

To do this extremely uncomfortable thing according to an expert uh jake the nerd how about speak in front of people you have to be able to confidently speak in front of people all right omar khan i'm gonna go with um you have to have the ability to ask people for help i think most successful people aren't afraid of knowing that they're not good at whatever part of uh you know their goal is they can delegate right exactly so they ask for help and they have no ego you know um uh pertaining to whatever matter they're trying to accomplish when i saw this clickbait and it said the most successful people are willing to do this uncomfortable thing ask someone's name if they forgot it i assumed it was you had to

service that person with your mouth and i go that sounds incredible it's uncomfortable to get on your knees for that long but uh apparently that's right you have to say no to good opportunities Whereas if any of us get any opportunity for anything, we're like, yep, yep, yep, yep. And apparently the real success. Oh, they have to stay their course, right? Right. They got to say like, hold on. This is a good opportunity and maybe it's a little bit more money right now, but does it put me towards the way I want to go?

If my goal is world domination and I got this opportunity over here that seems fun, it's going to pay me a nice paycheck, but it's not going to put me towards my goal of world domination. So I should have said no to my radio job so that I could stay the course and be a famous actress? Yeah. That would have not worked out. You could have still been working at that doll cafe serving dolls lemonade. I say no to these amazing opportunities. When we get back from this, that's why you are in the middle. That's why you're meeting.

Oh, yeah. I settled. You settled. Proud of it. I don't have the confidence. We are a show of settlers, and you have found your people. If you would like to join us and win yourself a giant TV for you or the father in your life and a bunch of money to spend on meat, booze, bacon, whatever,

now is the time to call us with your stories about dadlutions, solutions that only dads could come up with to real-world problems. 800-520-1067. We'll take those calls next. They rock on, Alicia. There are solutions to problems, and then there are dadlutions to problems, sometimes better and sometimes far worse.

And sometimes the words are even worse than dadlutions. It was tough. We did spend way too long coming up with something better, and then we decided let's just go back to that. It makes no sense. And Vanessa still can't pronounce it. It's time for the father of all giveaways. The father of all giveaways.

We will take your calls at 800-520-1067. And what will someone win right now, Allie, here on KROQ? Well, you could win a 75-inch TCL. Hold on a minute. Where's my paper? Where's my paper? TCL QM7L TV and a TCL Q7 5H sound bar and a Vons Albertsons Pavilions gift card for all your grilling needs. So everything you could possibly need to make this the most epic Father's Day ever.

That TV will be there so you can ignore your kids and family for the foreseeable future. Or maybe they gather around and you all watch a movie together. Think of all that sports, all the Dodgers, all the football you can watch on that amazing TV. World Cup action as well. It's just unbelievable. You read the specs of these TVs, and they're like, it has over 2,500 dimming features. I'm like, that's so many dimming levels. It's unbelievable.

We were inspired for this topic during a recent petty claims court on the show when we did hear from a mother that was complaining that she didn't like the way that the dad dressed their kids for school. And that's when we learned this. It was a real dadlution. I wear mittens, and it's hot. Oh, she's wearing mittens today? I just complained that it's cold in the morning, so I bought her some mittens. These are such guy solutions.

So she said she was cold, and so you sent her to school in mittens? Yes. That's a real dad-lution right there. She's chilly. Let's just give her mittens, and she can wear them to school. We say good morning now to Mary on KROQ 800-520-1067. Got to give this TV to someone. Might as well be you.

What's up, Mary? Hi, good morning, everybody. Shout out to NetBangers. Nice. Shout out NetBangers. What was your dadlution? So a few years ago, I got hit by a car. So any time I was in a vehicle, I would get extreme anxiety from being near, like, any other cars or being on the road.

But I needed to get to my doctor's appointments and physical therapy. So my dad had the bright idea of blindfolding me any time we were on the road. but he didn't think about how that would look to everybody else. So we would get the craziest looks, he said. And I think the most concerning part was that nobody ever even bothered to call the cops. Yeah, no one even pulled you over. Yeah, I could have been kidnapped. Right, so his plan was, right, rather than you just close your eyes

and put on sunglasses like a normal person, we're going to put a blindfold on you, and you're going to sit there so you're not freaked out by cars, right? Exactly. And was this while you were in the passenger seat or the driver's seat? No, I was in the back. Oh, in the back. Oh, my God.

I had a broken leg. I was in the trunk. Man, even more of a, that's such a funny dadlution right there. I got a problem. I got a solution. I'm going to blindfold you. Make sense in a dad's mind to go, well, you can't be afraid of the cars if you can't see them. Right.

I get that. I understand that thought process right there. We say good morning to Anthony now as we are celebrating some of the fine dadlutions that you've either come up with or grew up with. What's up, Anthony? uh yeah when i was younger i broke my arm and my dad took a broom handle and layered it like uh measure it out to my arm put it down there and tape my arm and said all right you're good to go nice so rather than go get you professionally checked out by i don't know urgent care a hospital er whatever he says i can go ahead and solve this broken arm and it was part

of a broomstick and tape yeah and then you know like when my mom came home she asked like what happened he's like i was i didn't want to interrupt my football game so i just did a temporary fix yeah broom has so many functions for a dad other than sweeping temporary fix be a weapon and did you immediately have to go get that looked at professionally or did that actually heal your arm no i ended up getting a cast you know a few hours later but when the mom came home and said what the f are you doing let's go to the hospital what the people at the hospital thought when he walks in with a broom taped to his arm and the dad was probably like yeah he's good right We're just here as a formality.

No, you need to be x-rayed. You can sit over there with all the other broom arm kids that the fathers also thought they solved the problem at home. Hey, Kim on KROQ, good morning. Hi. Hey, good morning. What is your dadlution that you experienced growing up? When I was either in kindergarten or first grade, I was, like, really skinny. So I got a note sent home from my teacher that my pants were constantly falling down.

So my dad's solution to that was he put duct tape instead of buying me a belt. and he decided to tape the duct tape around the pants to cinch them around your waist better yeah so he put it around the waist but he had the first day was a flaw because I couldn't take it down you had to break the tape

the first day you had an accident there that's the first that's an early lesson that women learn about it's very hard to take off outfits when you have to go to the bathroom yeah all these solutions would warrant a phone call from child protective services every single one of them but By the way, every dad probably thought, huh, I am a genius. Well, boom, problem solved.

She wants me to go out and buy belts, spend belt money? I got a million belts right here in this roll of duct tape. And dads think that they can fix everything with tape. I mean, duct tape is so strong. Don't you mount TVs with duct tape? Well, here's the thing. I have mounted, it's not duct tape. I've mounted TVs with double-sided adhesive before.

Oh, sorry, worse tape. But an even worse dadlution solution that my wife had given me the task. My kid bought one of those stupid malaria nets to put around her bed. What? Not malaria. I mean, they're not for malaria, but they're one of those princess nets. Like a little fancy princess. Like a princess net.

She wanted to have a net around her bed, like a net. So you can't see me use my iPad and buy all your Roblox. Because I'm a princess. This is when she was much younger. This is when we were transferring her from the crib to a bed, and she wanted to feel a little secure. And my wife said, can you figure out how to put this net up around her bed? And I said, you know, to keep the malaria out. She goes, what?

And I go, I don't know. I think that's why you bought this thing. And apparently you're supposed to find a stud in the ceiling and drill in. I wasn't going to deal with all that. So I just realized that with 10 Band-Aids, I could tape the top of the hook part to the ceiling. You didn't even use actual tape? No, because I thought it would rip apart. I thought it would rip off the paint on the ceiling.

So I just used it. First, I used three Band-Aids, but it wasn't enough to hold it. And then I just kept adding Band-Aids. Was it the flex waterproof ones? Yeah, 10 was the number. Two. Yeah, yeah. So it kept.

Great. But then she finally one time was laying in bed with my daughter reading a book and she looked up and she's like, did you attach this to the ceiling using a bunch of band-aids? I'm like, sure did. They don't even match the ceiling. It's like so obvious. Yeah, it was very obvious that I'd use band-aids. And then, yes, Ali's right. Once there was a little pressure, once she rolled over just a little bit, the whole thing came down.

But it lasted for weeks, so I feel like I still did my job. Hi, Octavio. Welcome to Dadlutions on KROQ. What's up? Hey, guys. Good morning. What does your dad do? What do you do?

So my kids wanted to take some Lunchables to school because all the kids had Lunchables. I said, I got something better for you. I got Dadables. I had some old crackers in the fridge. I had some old crackers in the pantry. Some cheese. Cut up some ham. Threw some jalapenos on them.

And we called them Dadables. We still use them today. So you save all that Lunchable money by making Dadables, and the major difference is you put sliced jalapenos in there? Yeah. Everything else seems like the same ingredients. Whatever you want to throw in it, we got it. I like that you also said you had old crackers in the pantry and old crackers in the fridge.

Yeah, everything's old. It's just all old. Can we just get a Lunchable? Old crackers in both places. No, no, we got all these old crackers all over the house. Everywhere as far as the eye can see, old crackers. Matthew, good morning. It's time to talk about Dadlution.

Someone's going to leave here with a giant brand-new TV, A bunch of money to spend on meat, beer, get you ready for all things Father's Day. What is it that's going on with your dad, Lucian? Good morning. Yeah, mine is actually fixed. My daughter's toilet was dental floss. I was visiting two years ago, and the chain broke. We're up in the middle of nowhere.

She lives in the boondocks. We're having some dental floss, but the plunger works. Wow, that's incredible. Every once in a while, you just need a guy like this that has one that actually holds and survives. And then you go, all right, all of the duct tape pants on moves seem like at least they came from a good intentioned place. The fact that he was able to tie the dental floss. That's just tying a knot. That's not that impressive.

Yeah, but you're doing it with a toilet. I mean, that's like proper toilet repair, especially that can, they can charge you like hundreds of dollars for fixes like that. And it is like cost no money. Kelly, what happened to you? Hey guys, what's up? So I am what you call or what is known as pigeon-toed, and I wore my shoes out faster than my sister when we were younger. And instead of buying me new shoes because my sister's shoes were still good, my dad super-glued the soles of my shoes back onto the shoe until my sister's shoes were worn out and ready to give both a new pair. Cool.

That's a great dad-lution right there. Yeah, for your pigeon-toed kid. All you need is some, and you can do a lot. A lot of problems solved, Dadlution style, with crazy glue. If you think about it, Allie. Oh, yeah. I think glue and duct tape is solving most problems for dads. All right, Felipe, we give you the phone.

We have to make a decision, Allie. Someone's got to leave here with a brand new TV. Felipe, go ahead. You're on KROQ. Hi. Hey, sweet dudes, guys. When I was younger, maybe around seven, I was hit by a car. My dad's illusion was to pick me up from the fetal position, take me to my aunt's house,

stretch me out on the couch, and wait. And wait for what? If your heart doesn't stop in two days, he's fine. That's about what it was. Yeah. But I think moms have the answer. A lot of times moms go, immediately, let's go to the ER. Better safe than sorry.

Yeah, I know. And that's what people want. They want to go through the proper protocols to make sure that nothing was missed. They want peace of mind. Dads really don't need peace of mind. No. It's just how do we solve something quickly and affordably. So that I can move on to the next thing.

In that Nate Borgazzi movie that's out, the wife leaves town for a while, so he's home. And the kids are trying to figure out why they keep smelling like their mother. And then they realize that the guy got so sick of doing laundry that he would just spray the mom's perfume on the pile of dirty clothes and kind of mix them around. That was his solution of doing laundry. I mean, it works for a little while. Usually, these are all temporary solutions. Yeah, they are. All right.

We got to decide. TV to give away. Thank you for all the calls. Thank you for everyone for participating. Once again, a TV a day, every day this week for Father's Day. Come back and announce the winner. Give that thing away next on KROQ. The father of all giveaways.

Giant TVs every single day this week. Giant piles of meat. That's our way of saying happy early Father's Day. And, Ali, it's time for us to now give away today's TV. We battled this out off the air and looked at the text line. And listen, there's a lot more people on the phone. I wish we could get to all of these, including the dad who dug a hole in the backyard and put a tarp there because the kids wanted a pool. Oh, my God.

That's a great cheap solution. Pools are so expensive. Mike says he had a twin brother. He was supposed to win an award, but he couldn't. So his dad had his twin brother show up and accept the award. That's a great dad-lution right there. Anyway, there's a bunch of different ones on here, including dads who use superglue to heal wounds. etc but listen after hearing all the stories the greatest dad lucian we heard so far today

was kim whose pants were too big and her dad decided to use duct tape instead of buying her a belt and then she peed herself at school because she couldn't take the duct tape off and kim this happened many years ago you still seem a little traumatized by it but as a result you won a giant tv for your dad yay thank you but i do want to say that he did um find a solution so the next day i went. He only wrapped it around once and showed me how to take it off, so I did it to myself. He did? The second solution was still not a belt? It was just

differently used duct tape? Less duct tape. Yeah. First time, probably went through half a roll. Second time, he was like, hold on. Yeah. Let me show you how to take the duct tape off and then put it back on. So here's the thing now. You've technically won this TV, but will you be keeping it or will you be giving it to your dad? No, I'm giving it to my dad.

Oh, that's so nice of you. That's good stuff right there. And he'll mount it himself, I'm sure. Beautiful moment. Hold on one second. Kim, thanks for sharing the story. Enjoy your giant brand-new TV. Your dad, I'm sure, will greatly appreciate it.

We've got to take ourselves a quick break. We've got the ADD News to get to in a moment. It's a brand-new hour of the show. And in less than 20 minutes, we need your name to put on this list so we can send you to Montreal, Canada to see some Evanescence, plus tickets to see them right here at the Kia Forum in July. So a couple of chances to win those coming up, including in less than 17 minutes right here on KROQ.

In about five minutes, we get your name on this list so that you can be a part of KROQ's Road Trip USA. Maybe you didn't plan anything this summer. You can start having that FOMO. You look at your friend's Instagram, and you realize, why is everyone doing something when I'm not? Let's go ahead and get you to Montreal to see Evanescence and give you tickets to see them right here in July at the Kia Forum. That will all be coming up the second Ali's done with this. Your news. Grab your Adderall.

It's time for ADD News. Some things you read and make you feel like the end of the world is just around the corner. The tides along California coast have been insane lately. Another person lost their life off the coast of Santa Cruz. Wombs just sleeping on the beach, and she was swept away. They're even worried that some people's homes are going to start flooding because the waves are so high that they're crashing over those protective walls that are supposed to keep the waves from hitting the house.

What are they calling these waves? There's some name for them. King, King Wave? Yeah, King Waves. I don't even know. King Tides. Oh, King Tides. King Tides.

That seems intense. I know. It sounds like a college football team. How long has that been going for? Like, and I know that usually this is the biggest ties they've had in this area in years. Unbelievable. These 20 foot waves. It's been insane.

But even more worried are some people who are afraid of earthquakes because now they are revealing a new report saying that the big one is closer than ever. Stress on the San Andreas fault line has reached its highest levels in a thousand years. That was a big one. Yeah, stress, I guess, normally releases with these large earthquakes, but we haven't had any large earthquakes, so it's been building for the past 160 years. That's how long it's been since the last, quote, major rupture, and they said the fault system is in a, quote, critically loaded state. Oh, boy. Can't we just lube it up or something, put some WD-40 down there? That's a great idea.

We need a dadlution now. That big bottle of KY I stole from the OBGYN's office? There we go. Solved that problem. Put a couple of Band-Aids on that fault. Yeah, done and done. It's going to be a big earthquake or a fat alley. If I needed 10 Band-Aids.

I know, why don't I just take a stomp, a stomp. 10 Band-Aids to hang a net from my kid's ceiling. How many Band-Aids would I need to solve a fault from rupturing? I think just a couple of Costco trips with Band-Aids and you're good. But here's the thing, because there are certain days here, like we had all these earthquake swarms recently, right, where they would say something. I know they weren't big ones, but they were all like three and under. But there were certain days where they would say, like, nine earthquakes hit, you know, areas like Rancho Cucamonga.

And it was all across, too. Yeah, it was all across. Isn't that, doesn't that let some of the pressure out? I thought that was part of the deal. I don't think enough. Really? Because that's what they're saying is we need a big, big earthquake to release the pressure. These little ones don't do enough.

So what they're saying now is it's something like we're a thousand years, was it a thousand years overdue or something? I saw it come to the number of thousands. Think about yourself when you actually get to have sex versus just pleasuring yourself. That's like a mini version of what you really want, right? So you can't do that forever because you're still going to go insane. You have to have the real thing sometimes. Right. That's the only comparison I can think of.

Right. I guess that's about right. And like, Jake, when you were all pent up for almost as long as the fault is. But I'm saying now you've had sex in the last couple of weeks. But when you were going on that like, you know, year-long drought. I was in the worst mood. Right. Terrible mood.

And he was all ornery the whole time and grumpy. Shut up. Then he finally released and the whole shack went shaking. So I get it. There's just scary times if you're one of these people that's afraid of the big ones. Now's the time. The big one is a coming. For people with realistic fears like waves, tsunamis, earthquakes, fires, yeah, now's not a great time for you.

It's unsettling to hear IVF oopsie stories considering I just got pregnant through IVF. And this couple had given birth to a baby that was conceived through IVF. This is a big story. The couple is now suing the IVF clinic because the baby was born a totally different race. Both of the parents were white, so the embryo that they gave birth to should have been a white baby. But that was not the case when the baby came out. Then they were able to eventually prove through a genetic test that the baby was not genetically connected to them. It was a real switcheroo, oopsie, wrong embryo scenario.

So now they're suing the clinic, but also decided they're keeping the baby. Even though they found the biological parents The other couple that created a different embryo They're just going to keep the baby And say hey you know what this baby grew inside of me We feel connected to the baby Baby's got a white girl name But that's her life now

Also it makes you instantly cooler if you're two white people Totally So much street cred It's like what That's a great story How did it happen don't ask I'm going to make millions of dollars off of it Because you know every single person they meet

is going, hold on, I'm trying to figure this out. She was pregnant, so instantly there's a thought of she got impregnated by someone else. There's got to be a thought of someone else. You think that would be pretty extreme cheating that you would get an embryo made with the person you're cheating with? I'm saying the average person

wouldn't think that. The average person is going to say I saw her pregnant because she's the one carrying the baby, right? So they saw her pregnant and all of a sudden this kid pops out and he's a different shade than the dad? Right, so the rumor is she must have cheated or something. And they're like, no, no, it was an IVF switch. And they're like, okay. Every single one of her black friends immediately is under suspicion, right?

Like, immediately. Even if that's not what happened at all. He's like, I'm gay! Dude, I wish that there could be a little switch just so I could make some money. Well, listen, it's one of those stories. This baby is now neither part either of them, is that right? No, it belongs to a totally different couple. That's crazy.

But the IVF clinic switched the embryo, so it's a different couple that was doing IVF. It's their embryo. So I wonder if the black couple has their baby. Well, they, I don't know what happened with them. I don't think they completely switched. I don't even know if the other couple has gone through their IVF cycle yet, but it was somebody else's embryo. But, I mean, those things are microscopic. When they put mine in, they have to then go to another room, take a microscope, and make sure the thing even went in.

And then they make a phone call going, all clear. Wouldn't the people who lost the embryo have dibs on the baby now? Because I know now it's been grown to a full-size baby, but wouldn't they say, hold on, that's our baby? Yeah, I mean, I would imagine you have to get an okay from them going, hey, is it cool that we are in possession of your baby? I mean, to them, I guess they're less connected to it because they didn't grow the thing themselves. But it is their embryo. It's their genetics. What if the wife was just going in because this is the only way, but now they've got a free surrogate?

Yeah. You know? Yeah, take that off. She doesn't have to get pregnant and go through all that stuff. Yeah. She's like, oh, I'll just take that one. That was easy. When do you find out what you have going on inside of you?

Because I know that you said your levels were doubling and tripling too quickly. And either you could be, this could be one of those weird situations. I didn't even know this. When Allie told us that she has potential for twins, I didn't know you came from, you have two sets of identical twins in your family. Well, my dad is a twin, and then I have two sets of twins on my mom's side as well. So there's twins all over the place. Both natural and IVF, a lot of different methods, but a lot of twins for sure. And then you're more likely to have twins when you're older.

And also with IVF, I looked it up. There's like a 1% to 3% chance that I have twins in me right now. But they did say that my levels were going higher, you know, than a normal person. And if you look at Allie next to her sister, Allie does look like the Danny DeVito of that kind of twin set right there. Right. But I'm still the bigger one. Yeah, you are. But next Friday is my ultrasound.

Oh, that's today. My first ultrasound, yeah. Mark your calendars. SpaceX is the biggest business headline of the week. The stock has grown over 50% since it started trading, which only been on the market two days. But that's not the only exciting thing going on. If you missed the train on SpaceX, you can get in on Ice Cube's Big 3 Basketball League.

Ice Cube announced that he plans to take his three-on-three basketball league public. And the estimated value of that company is $290 million. So if you want to get in on that, you will have the opportunity. The other big business headline is another big company has sold Pizza Hut. sold for $2.7 billion to a private equity firm. And they were happy to sell because, obviously, they could never live up to Domino's glory. Just so you know, Ali, SpaceX currently is up $50 today alone. No, it's not.

I've been watching it. It's not up $50. I'm looking at it right now. No, it's not. $211.23 right now. Okay, well, I wanted to let you know that I did end up buying some. Ali was iced out of the SpaceX. But the good news is there's plenty of space for you in the Pizza Hut merger.

So we got room for you there. And I might invest in this three-on-three basketball. Great. I'm sure that will work. Just deciding. We get into a brand new hour of the show right now. Looking for caller 20 at 800-520-1067. Let's go.