Klein/Ally Show: The Podcast - HOUR 2- Short People Problems, Import/Export and MORE

Episode Date: June 30, 2026

About to get into a brand new episode of Klein Alley Show, but first let's tell you about our good friends at the finest airport that ever was and ever will be. The San Bernardino International Airport. Especially when there's summer travel plans, it can get expensive at these airports. That's why you gotta go to this airport where parking is just five bucks a day. Plus you got those easy trips, San Francisco or Provo, Utah. Maybe you didn't plan anything this summer. See how easy it is. Don't be one of those people who has to pack your patience. Go to San Bernardino International Airport. Okay, enough shilling. Now it's time to get into a brand new episode of Klein Alley Show. This is the world famous K-Rock. If you are a shorty, this is a good hour for you to be listening to K-Rock

because Vanessa claims that she's sick and tired of being short. She wants to change all that. You may actually buy her some stilts before the show is over today, but the question for you, and we'll get to this a little bit later, is what is the worst part? We call this thing short people, big problems, because Vanessa claims that a new big problem she's encountered is a lot of times people try to pick her up.

She hates it. I know that was a pet peeve of Brad Williams as a very short man. He said, I never, ever want to be picked up, and I don't ever even want to be asked to be picked up. I am an adult man. Just because I'm small doesn't mean people... I would love to get picked up. I think I'm that lazy.

Pick me up, go, take me, I don't care. I agree. Grass is greener. Put me in a baby barn. This is a greener situation, and a little bit later this hour, we'll talk to you, short people. Short people, big problems. Could score yourself a trip to a wild, well, to a bunch of different water parks where probably you won't be able to go on any of the rides, but still.

Lazy River It. It's Lazy River It. We'll make that happen for you coming up later this hour, and then, of course, 9 a.m. Sharp, be ready to call and win your way into the water parks as well as we keep you nice and cool all summer long at K-Rock. Also get into some clickbait, but in a moment, there's something that's happening in another country that we need to determine. Is it worthy of an import?

or do we export it forever? This is something that I think we've talked about versions of before, but now it is taking off in one of the Koreas. I won't tell you which one. We'll do that next. Some of the greatest things we have in this country, happy 250th birthday, by the way, America, came from other countries originally.

Everything from meatballs to menage a trois started elsewhere, and that's why we have to look at what's happening around the world and decide, is this worthy of an import, or do we export it and keep it where it is? This one comes to us from South Korea. And it's something that we've talked about versions of, Allie, but I don't think we've ever actually played around with this concept. This would infuriate me so much.

I feel like you've inadvertently done this. I have, and I've been fooled, and it's a terrible feeling. But apparently if you go into this with the intention of this new app that they're using, maybe it changes everything. People save money, lose weight. Will they? I don't know. Listen to this. A South Korean app has gone viral for letting people pretend to order food.

So it looks like a food delivery app, except there's one major difference. Food Never Comes is designed to act like food delivery apps, but nothing actually happens when you hit order. So if you've ever tried to order food and you screwed something up or you didn't actually approve it or said that one final verification or whatever and the food never shows up, that's a terrible feeling. And your wife has done that many, many times. I think the last time she only ordered utensils, right? Four sets of utensils. Four sets of utensils are on, but no food. So I had heard about different websites that give you this dopamine hit where you're online shopping, you're buying things, but then when you click buy, you're not really buying anything.

You're just pretending to buy. You were saying during Prime Days, you were doing a lot of add to cart, add to cart without actually ever having the intention of buying. Yeah, and Vanessa has 75 items in her Amazon cart that she doesn't buy. That was last week. Who knows what that number's up to now? Actually, also, I pretend to door dash all the time. What? You do what?

Yeah, because, like, I'm like, okay, let's see if there's something I want. And then I'll fill up my car, and then, like, time has passed, and, like, now I know that I shouldn't get it. So it's like I'm pretending, like, okay, maybe I will get it. You put a whole order. You open up DoorDash. You scroll through, look at the pictures of the food. You add, add, add, add. You make modifications, too, and stuff?

Yeah, like, maybe I'll order it. But then if time has passed where it will, then it's like, okay, well, now you can't get it, girl. You took too long. You can still get it. I mean, it's there for you. Wait till the restaurant closes? Now it's past your bedtime. Wait, so you'll put in all the stuff.

You'll get excited about it. Or like I'll see my order and I can be like, okay, you know what? I can make this. I'm trying not to spend money, but I'm also like, so what if? So you're basically just testing the waters. Exactly. So you're seeing if you really want to order food by ordering the food but not actually ordering it? Yes.

But do you ever get, you know, even if your plan is I'm just going to go ahead and get the dopamine hit of putting an order together, do you ever sometimes look at the order and go, that looks good, and then hit send and order it? If it's sushi, I'm like, you know what? I can't make this at home. Yeah. You can't make any of this. Well, that's interesting, but I, for me, when I'm ordering food, there is a clear decision. that I want food and I even know

what restaurant I want it from or I know what type of food I want and then that ordering process happening immediately because we're all starving. I think this is different. I set up an order just like I hit press and send as I get in the car. Right. Yeah, that's how I think most people look at it. Now, there's people that are going, I think I'm

kind of hungry, but I have no idea what I feel like and then they start scrolling the app. That's when I think you start getting more into the idea of what could I be eating? I think we're all blown away about the possibilities. Well, we could be eating anything right now. If I'm going to fake buy anything, let it be the coolest, biggest thing ever. Why are you going to fake buy like a taco combo platter?

I'm not going to fake buy ramen. I want to fake buy a million dollar mansion. Right. And then I want to fake buy stuff like designer clothes or something crazy. But here's the thing that's interesting. No one judges. We don't judge each other that we spend time going on Zillow or Redfin and looking at houses that we know we can't afford. And being like, hmm, that walk-in closet's a little small.

Yeah, probably couldn't, probably wouldn't buy that one anyway. Only three pools? Shut up. But, you know, but we all do that anyway because that's a fun way to live. That's the dopamine hit. But to now... I don't do that. Bring it down to, well, Jake, I mean, you're a shack guy. You're always going to be a shack guy.

Yeah, I look at other shacks. Yeah, Jake looks at other shacks available. No, it's not a shack. Three windows, whoa. What? Three windows? That's a shack. That's a shed. That's insane.

That's a window per wall. So do we import this, Allie? Nothing actually happens when you hit order. The app is a so-called dopamine site aimed at giving users the buzz of buying something without spending money. I don't like this. That's his opinion. And just so that people don't get confused and accidentally order food that they didn't want to begin with, it's called Nothing Ever Comes or whatever. It's called No Food Comes or something.

No Food Comes. But the thing is, if you have this app, don't put it next to your actual DoorDash app. Right. Because if you order for the wrong app, the food won't come. And the right app, it will come. Yeah, this is much funnier as a prank app where I can put it on my friend's phone. You just pass it around, guys. Add everything that you want to add.

Add what you want. And then just feel. Psych! Nothing's coming. Nothing's arriving. Some people save a lot of money by just pretending. So I know you're big on, you're very cost conscious. So would that appeal to you in any sense?

No, because I've got to eat. Then I'm still hungry. Yeah, then you're still hungry. Yeah, I've got to eat. I'd rather just go ahead and spend the money and eat. Yeah, I don't know about this. I just think, I mean, we are so deep. It's a dopamine hit, right?

So when you press buy, it gives you that rush. And then people are saying, hey, I don't actually need the product. I just need the rush of, yeah, I'm with you. Two thumbs down. All right. Is that an import or export, Ali? What do you think? I think you should ask her a couple more questions about it, and she'll change her mind again.

She could go back. I could see her. She loved it a moment ago. Now she's two thumbs down. You know what? I don't know. Boo. I think I'm going to strongly export this.

That's an export. Keep it, South Korea. What a waste of time. That's for you. Omar, is that an import or an export? You know, I'll import it for Vanessa because she enjoys it. What do you have currently, Vanessa, in your DoorDash cart? Anything in there?

Let's see. Maybe I forgot to delete. Let me see. I'd be curious to see what she's got in there right now. And I wonder if you would just order fantastical foods. Yeah, like decadent stuff. Yes. Stuff that's like so unhealthy for you, but you would love to eat it.

Or like, you know, tomahawk steak or something to be delivered to your house. Because it'd be sad if you're playing this little game, this fake dopamine game, and it's like fast food. It's like meal for one. Right, right. Vanessa, what do you have in there? Actually, my car is empty. Oh. I'd like to get you that.

Trust me, I do this all the time because it's like, okay, there's a chance I'll buy this, but there's also a chance I won't. Where's your go-to? Like, what restaurant do you always hit up? Where's your fake order? I always go to this one sushi place. This place calls Soronatown for Mexican food. Oh, yeah.

Sometimes I do ramen. I do a little pho. But these places have never actually delivered you food ever. Yeah, I've ordered food sometimes. Sometimes I look up sandwiches. Which one do I really want? Different places. I could see you doing it for a sandwich.

That big Italian one. It's got everything on it. And then I'm like, I'll just have a turkey provolone. If you know you're never going to order it, just keep adding more and more. Double me. Why not? Triple me. And then you play with the price.

Like, this is possible. But you know what? I'm going to make it happen. 781 said that they fake order things just like Vanessa does. That's crazy. 74 said this app is so stupid you wouldn't even have a dopamine high because you know it's not coming right that's the one major difference right you would think going into it you know i'm not maybe it should be like a roulette situation where like every 10th time

it does come but i want to say a bit of a trendsetter here because if you remember during covid i started planning and these whole vacate knowing i was never going to go on these vacations i was just planning these elaborate vacations and then it came back to bite me in the ass because i accidentally got charged so much the the vacation part is the best part the planning of the vacation is the worst part i don't want to do all the planning well and then not actually have the vacation all right we're going to vote export on this one you can keep it south korea quick break we're back in a moment are you a short person do you have big problems we will take your calls in a moment 805-201067 uh we will uh vanessa said she's sick and tired of people trying to lift

her up but there's other reasons out there why being short sucks and we will try to make it worth your while by getting you into something i don't know we got monster we got a lot of stuff to give you today so uh call now play next 805-201067 after this short people big problems It's the K-Rock Klein Alley Show. What is going on? How tall are you? And why do you hate? Obviously, there's different reasons.

I think pros and cons for both. I'm sure there's a lot of tall people out there that go, you know, everyone thinks it's great for us. But socks, it starts raining. Hits me first. Other people say, being tall sucks. I've got to get ass to do a lot of stuff. That extra .3 seconds. Yeah, you're getting soaked.

How many more drops are hitting them before everyone else? Vanessa claims yesterday they were, her and Johnny were at some college shooting a video. and everyone kept trying to pick Vanessa up even though I don't think that was part of the video. Yeah, it was just something he wanted to do. No, he just, one of the directors hoisted her up without her knowing and then she clearly didn't like it

by her facial expression. For what reason? He put her up on the wall because I'm so tall. What? Put her up on the wall? What the hell is happening to you? It was like a rock wall in front of a fountain. So he like hoisted her up, turned around

and just plopped her there like a stuffed animal. And it's also because Johnny's so tall Also, when we have to do shots that are next to each other, we look funny. So I'm like, oh. It's great. It's like Danny DeVito in Arnold Schwarzenegger. So they had to prop you on a wall so that you guys could be in the same shot? Yeah, but, like, getting picked up as, like, you're a grown-ass adult,

and then they pick you up like, ha-ha, and like, come on, dude. It is funny. I've seen one of these commercials that they did before, and they do do weird stuff to try and— It's for Santa Monica College, I think. but it's like they they put they put johnny really far away and vanessa really up close thinking that it would like even them out like an illusion or something just like strange that why are they so far away from each other talking about the college and i guess because they need

to get in the same shot but johnny's like six two or something like that i'm six four johnny's six four and vanessa what is it vanessa what are you four six are you the opposite of johnny four eleven and a half yeah so anyway the two of them can't it's impossible to get them in the same shot so They've tried everything. This time they had to taper to a wall, I guess. This director is like Scorsese level. My God. That's incredible.

What is he able to do? Must be a good college if they put that much effort in the commercial. So anyway, that being said, we understand that being short comes with challenges. And now there's a bunch of people on the phone that would like to vent about those challenges. We start with David, who's 4'11". Hi, David. Welcome to KROQ. Being short sucks.

I'm 4'11". About 50 years old. Every time I go to the barbershop to get my hair cut, they always put me on that children's, that little wooden plank to raise me up. The booster seat? The booster seat to get my hair cut. Wait a minute. Don't they have those little things where they pump it up, pump it up, and raise the chair? They're like, what is happening?

Yeah, those chairs go up. Why do they put you on the box of shame? They always put me on that booster seat to get my hair cut. Why don't you go to a different place, man? Yeah, they're punking you clearly, man. You should go to a kid's haircut place. Those chairs go way higher. I could put you in one of those old taxi cabs and cut your hair.

Hold on. Yeah, 411 is, that's pretty short. You don't need to say that, Al. He knows it. But then every, so you dread haircut day because you know that they're going to bring out that box and put you on it. Exactly. But I mean, when I get my hair cut, I've been to a lot of places. The place I go right now where they put me in the booster seat, they always do my hair right.

But at the same time, it's kind of, like, kind of embarrassing. Yeah. I would think that's one of those places where you could feel like you are an equal. You're sitting in a chair. You've got that giant cape blocking most of your tiny little body. And so, as a result, you would think that's one of the places where you feel like I have to have anyone walking in here. It's the great equalizer. It's always me with a lollipop.

Is this the only place where you feel this way? Or is it, like, do they try and give you a booster seat in restaurants, too? well not the restaurant but like i said mainly when i go get my haircut the person's there you know you always put you in the boot your seat because i'm a little short but i mean i just do it i mean but like i said i get to leave with a lollipop so it makes my day yeah good for you you make them you should at least get one let's say hi to uh let's say hi to lisa on camera hi Elisa, good morning. Good morning.

Hi. Ashley Divitz. How tall are you? I'm 5'1". But the most annoying part about being short is that my daughter's three years old and she's more than half my size. So every time I pick her up and tell people I'm her mom, they're like a thousand follow-up questions like, oh, her dad must be a giant or like, how did that come out of you?

Those are fun park conversations, I'm sure. So she's three years old, and she's already over half your size? Yeah. That's crazy. Wow. Can you answer all those dumb questions you just asked? Most of the time, I just try and walk away, but it's hard because she's difficult to pick up. Because you have such little legs.

Come out here. Trying to walk away from your question, but I can't. Those tiny little legs. Damn. That's an annoying part about it, I guess, as well. Forget about all the things that physically you can't do, but it's the questions that come with it. Yeah, I know.

And I'm sure you have to answer the same five questions over and over again. Laura, what's the worst part about being short? Welcome to K-Rock. This is little people, big problems or something like that. Hey, what's up? Hi, going to concerts and just looking at the Jumbotron the whole time

because you can't see the stage. Even if you've got great seats, it doesn't matter because if there's one person in front of you, they are blocking you. They stand up, and I'm having to look sideways. My son even tried to invent this little step that I could hide and sneak in and put it on the floor. It's horrible.

Your son invented a little portable step stool to sneak into concerts? Yes, that I could hide in my back or in my front, that they won't take it away from me, and then I could step and see the concert. And what happened? No, it worked, but then it's also uncomfortable. And one time I got busted and I had to take it back to my car. I don't know.

You remember those Reebok pump shoes? They made your shoes tighter, but they could come up with some version of that, I guess. Give you a couple inches. I do feel really bad at the concerts for short people. I think that is a really tough existence. And then you see an artist that you really, really love, and then you don't know what you're taking a gamble every time you go suzy what's the worst

part about being short good morning hi good morning um trying to get anything off of the top shelf of any grocery store ever especially like heavy stuff like sodas like i'm weak and short and it's difficult well then you have to ask for help and there's no help around these grocery stores anymore oh yeah i've like waited in like the aisle and like my boyfriend even got me a bunch of like um uh platform trucks so that i'd be a little bit taller but i still need help and you end up just not getting the stuff you really want because it's just too hard to reach so you end up going with some crappier brand or something yeah that'd be good for me i'm there like in the morning and there's not a lot of staff around like i'm kind of screwed yeah that's tough

right there because i mean i i actually you know as much as you guys uh joke about you know me There's nothing that makes me feel better about myself than when someone like that size will ask me in a grocery store to help them get something off of Top Shelf. I love helping them do that. Like, I love giving them the look because they give you the look like, I need to ask you to help me grab this. And I'm like, girl, I got you. And I grabbed the huge thing of Coca-Cola or the pasta they can't reach. So you like being tall, obviously, Johnny. There's no downsides?

Not at all, except some cars I don't fit in. But then it's like, why are you driving such a tiny car? Sherry, well, your old car, you couldn't fit in it at all. It was hilarious. Yeah, that was a tiny car. Like, I used to, like, bang my knees in that all the time. Hey, Sherry on KROQ, what is the worst part about being short for you? Hey, good morning.

The worst part is last night my smoke alarm went off. Oh, man. I tried to get a chair out of the corner to get up there to turn it off, but I was still, like, two inches away from reaching it. So I had to go hunting all over my house for this mini ladder, and I grabbed that and, like, a wooden spoon for my kitchen just to be able to reach it. You have to get really creative when you're doing that. Yeah, nothing about that. A chair, a ladder, and a spoon just to finally push the thing.

The smoke alarm. The smoke alarm, which is there to save your life. And it's beeping at you all the while, which just makes you more annoyed. Shaming you. Angie, you believe there's a different thing that's the worst part about being short. What is it? Hi.

I hate that people, like, pat me like a dog. I hate that. It's really annoying. Aw, that's so degrading. What does that mean, they pet you? Not like, like, they pat me on the head. They're like, oh, you're so cute, and they, like, pat you on the head.

Like, that's so degrading. Yeah, that wouldn't happen to anyone that was, like, you know. They can't reach. Yeah, but I'm not even saying a tall person, But I don't think someone that was, like, 5'5 would get pat on the head. I just don't think that would happen. But I guess, what are you, 4-something? I'm 5'2.

Vanessa, do you get pat on the head? Do you get pat on the head ever? Yes, and I'm like, excuse me? Like, you think you could just go like this? Or, like, I don't know, like, put your arm around my shoulder? Like, I'm not a headrest, my buddy. Get out of here. Oh, so people will put their arm on your head?

Yes. Like, this is my head. Oh. That's funny. That's so funny, too. All right, well, I'm glad we're getting this out there. I'm glad we're getting some more ideas of things to do with Vanessa. I didn't realize all these things I could be doing with Vanessa.

What a sucker I am. You're a good girl. I didn't realize that. Hey, Vanessa, if we have a good show today, I will pet you afterwards, okay? Another person said that the worst part about being short is that the sun visor in the car doesn't work for them. That's so true. Doesn't block the sun when you're short. Doesn't block the sun at all.

That's so true. Hold on, there's a tall person that wants to get in on this as well. Javier, north of six feet. Why does being tall suck? Oh, because sometimes, okay, let's say my bathroom, I have this medicine cabinet, and if someone leaves the door open, if I'm not aware, I'll turn around and bump the corner of it and that sucks. Or like low lamps in the kitchen or dining room. Oh, yeah, he's got his head on low lamps.

Yeah. Meanwhile, Vanessa could just cruise under those lamps, no harm, no foul. See, everyone thinks it's better. Hold on, Sabrina couldn't get a job because she was too short. What could you not do, Sabrina? Well, I wanted to be a firefighter when I was younger, and everyone has to take those little tests. There's like 11 stations, and one of them is removing a ladder from the wall and logging around with it and placing it back. Well, I'm 5'2", so it was like above my shoulders, and it's just all arm strength, and so I'm just dead, just dead arm strength.

That's a bummer. It's too bad, Irony, that the thing that stood between her and getting the job was a ladder, the one thing that would have solved most of her problems. Wow, so I guess when you think about it, there's probably not that many really short firefighters. I'm not going to lie, I wouldn't want her as my fireman. I want to end this with the shortest person we have on the phone right now. And I actually think having a little fire person would be great. Think of how many of them you could fit in that truck. Yeah, they could all come down the chimney.

Keep coming out. We say hi to Jasmine. She's the shortest person. Jasmine, how tall are you? Good morning. I am 4'7". Okay. What is the worst part about being 4'7"? Um, other than all the things that everyone has said, like you being used as an armrest and all that and hearing people talk crap, like saying like, oh my God, she's so short when you come walking by is probably shoe shopping because I have to go to the kid's section.

So a lot of my heels will have Velcro on them. Like a little kid. A shoe shop? Trouble with a shoe shop? You're saying that when you want to wear heels, you have to have those ones that have like Jasmine on them or Elsa? pretty much oh man but you so you pretty much have to shop in the kids get out your slutty heels tonight i either have to go to the kids section like at target and all that or i have

to go to like those little asian stores that have high heels oh wow yeah all right well listen i apologize it's usually cheaper vanessa i didn't realize all of the struggles that you deal with on she's saying vanessa's feeling very heard right now very seen i mean also unseen at the same time but still very seen right now. And thank you for all you shorties for giving us some of your time on KROQ. KROQ, we're a Klein Alley show. If you need us, you can interact lots of ways.

Call, text, get on the DMs, Klein Alley Show. Or if you'd rather, you can leave messages on the go line, 844-956-GO. Hey, Alley, that joke today that Klein made, that was gold, baby. Pure gold. Leotarded. Oh, wow.

Wow. I can't take credit for that joke. That was a joke that was made by Allie's unborn baby. So I would love to take credit for a great joke like that. But this was yesterday as we put the microphone down to Allie's womb and we listened to the baby growing inside of her. This is what the baby said. And Allie doesn't like this bit. No, I think it's rather stupid.

She's refused to hold the microphone anywhere near her. She used to jump on board. She'd hop up. She'd put the microphone sometimes inside of her. She used to. Now she won't even pretend to put the mic down. there so omar just has to turn up the volume even louder so that we could hear the baby i hope i am smart unlike my brother who keeps saying leotard i hope i'm not leotarded so that was uh that was

he's making the same joke again today that's the best joke you've ever made according to that goat like color according to i didn't make the joke i want you to think about that's your unborn baby that made that joke right i'm glad you don't want to take credit for the joke oh well i didn't write Yes, you did. The baby said it. My baby didn't say anything. The baby doesn't talk. The more you say your baby's not talking, the more we're going to have to turn that mic up and listen.

Well, at least write some new material for it. The same two that you're cycling through. Listen, the baby's tired, all right? Oh, got it. Are you the baby in the scenario now? In the scenario, I'm the baby. We take a quick break. We're back in a second.

We have ADD news to get to. We'll listen in and find out. You know what? When we get back, I'm going to listen in on what's really happening in there. Because I bet you the baby's got more to say today. Great. Speed writing. And then we'll come back with that.

And then we've got these tickets to give you. So you can go to every water park in Southern California. Coming up at 9 a.m. sharp and every hour thereafter. All next game. All right. Let's get into the ADD news. And then we've got your tickets to go to. Listen to this.

You get all. You don't have to pick. You get all of these. Wild Rivers, Not Soak City, and Six Flags Hurricane Harbor, Los Angeles. All in your future. so you can spend all summer floating lazy rivers, going down fast water slides, and not getting too hot, which is what it's all about. Hold on.

Wait a minute, Allie. It looks like there's some action happening in your stomach right now. Would you hold the microphone down there? I'm glad we have time for this. We can just check in with you. I know you love it when we do this. Yes, you said you want a new material for your baby. Go ahead, Allie's unborn baby.

Thanks for asking. I'm tired. But it's okay because I'm about to get the best nap during this ADD News. And now, here's my boring mom. Grab your Adderall. It's time for ADD News. Thanks. Take it away, Allie.

Good material, kid. Good material. Smart kid. Very. We're all getting our snooze. Yeah. Glad. Glad that you found a way to make me even more angry.

It's what they call rage baiting, I think. All right. Cool. Is that the baby? That's, I think, everyone. Oh. i'll start out with something titillating for you klein if you're a teacher having sex with your students is generally frowned upon occasionally it would be true love but 99.99

of the time you're just being a creep now this teacher had sex with multiple students she was 25 years old these students were around 16 years old and in a weird way i kind of feel bad for her because the students after they had sex with her filmed it and turned it around on her to blackmail her for better grades oh my god that's bored now not not so bored anymore wake up kid hear the story take a listen teacher sex scandal with a twist she's accused of having sex with two high school students including inside her classroom closet she also allegedly had a student watch the racy movie 50 shades of gray but according to cops the students actually They tried to blackmail the teacher to give them better grades.

Justin Fitch explains, and we want to warn you, these details may be graphic. A high school biology teacher is facing shocking charges today. It's great that you could blackmail for a biology class. Boring, right? I know, that's a real, I could have used a grade now. My first D, I think, I got was biology. Including allegedly showing the raunchy movie Fifty Shades of Grey to a 16-year-old student. 25-year-old Maris Nichols is accused of having sex with two students and having inappropriate contact with up to five others. The documents also say that victims blackmailed Nichols to give them good grades.

And if she didn't, they threatened to expose the fact that, get this, she had an OnlyFans account. Boom. I mean, that seems like that's not the biggest thing they could expose. Get this. How about the fact that she's sleeping with students? That seems to be a much bigger thing. they don't even know how to blackmail properly. The fact that they were, like,

I wonder how premeditated this was. If they were like, this teacher has already had sex with, like, three students. Right, if we sleep with her, then we can blackmail her. If we sleep with her, I bet we could probably blackmail her, and I don't know if this happened with them together or separately. Well, you see how dumb it is, because they're kids,

and they only blackmail for better grades. You could have gotten so much more better stuff. Yeah, she's our teacher. She doesn't probably have a ton of money, and she's already sleeping with them, So what else can you get for? At that point, the grades are everything. I mean, if someone said to you, listen, you're going to fail biology.

If you fail biology, you have to repeat whatever this is, 10th, 11th grade. They go, oh, man, I don't want to study. So what else can we do? Sleep with a teacher sounds a lot more fun than studying. But would you ask for just better grades for that one class? I would be like, I want all A's. Figure it out. In every subject.

Then you know that then all of a sudden people start getting suspicious. But I wonder how this all got uncovered because obviously we all know now what happened. right so did she agree to give the better grades or was she like no fine i should just be exposed is she uh attractive ellen you know i don't have a visual on her because i have noticed lately and obviously i just want to make this very clear because i know someone will send some angry email and say they can't believe that we are sensationalizing a teacher sleeping with students it's not a good thing don't stand by it think it's wrong on a bunch of levels that all being said Oh, no, she's not bad looking.

There's a lot of these attract, I mean, pretty good looking, like. Well, and you're 25. That's a very young teacher. Female teachers. And by the way, I don't know. I was not one of these 16-year-olds that had a full-on beard, goatee, whatever. Some of these 16-year-olds look older than I do now. Yeah.

And you know what? I understand that maybe there are scenarios where it's, quote, consensual. But if you are an older teacher, you're supposed to be a role model for a kid. You're not supposed to be eye candy, and you're not supposed to give in to maybe an innocent crush that a 16-year-old has on their teacher. But it does feel, and Omar says I say it happens all the time, and he goes, how often is all the time? I don't know what it is lately, but it seems like there's every couple of weeks another story of female teacher sleeping with some student. There's a girl that I went to, well, I used to do musicals with her, and she ended up having an affair. She cheated on her husband with one of her students, and she ended up going to prison for two years.

Whoa. And this was high school or college? I don't think you'd go. You'd lose your job. No, it wasn't college. I believe it was high school. She went to prison for two years. Yeah, two years.

I saw her mugshot and everything. I was like, whoa, Colette? What happened? Was she attractive too? I mean, yeah, she was cute. I can't figure out what's going on with this. I think that she really, I think it was like a multiple times relationship type thing. It wasn't just like, hey, we had sex once.

It was like she really thought she was in love with this kid. I mean, I never had a chance with any of my teachers at all. And not only did they not find me sexually attractive, they just didn't like me as a person. I mean, I would have loved even a friendship. You still tried to blackmail them. It didn't work. Yeah, they said, whatever, dude. You got nothing on us.

We've never looked at you that way. So Noah Khan has made some public comments earlier this week about people pooping their pants at his show. And he has followed this up at another recent show by making his fans take an oath to go to the bathroom in a real toilet versus on the floor of the venue. He made the audience repeat after him. When you enter this building, you enter a social contract, right? And one of the big number rule number two besides don't literally kill each other is don't on the floor. We're going to do some therapy type thing where we all basically repeat after me. OK, I solemnly swear I will not my pants.

And if I do, I won't take it from my pants and put it on the floor. OK, we lost the crowd on that one. I pooped my pants and I don't have underwear. I take an oath, Vanessa. Take an oath. This is why we don't have a show. Guys, everyone made fun of us when we said rock pants. It's time for Rock Pants, and now we're just getting more and more real-world examples of why Rock Pants would solve all our problems.

Hey, call it 20. Let's go ahead and make your water park dreams come true right now at 800-520-1067. You can take an oath as well. We'll come back with that on KROQ.