Klein/Ally Show: The Podcast - HOUR 2- The Dumb Off Finals, Clickbait and MORE

Episode Date: August 21, 2026

About to get into a brand new episode of Klein Alley Show, but first let's tell you about our good friends at the finest airport that ever was and ever will be. The San Bernardino International Airport. Especially when there's summer travel plans, it can get expensive at these airports. That's why you gotta go to this airport where parking is just five bucks a day. Plus you got those easy trips, San Francisco or Provo, Utah. Maybe you didn't plan anything this summer. See how easy it is. Don't be one of those people who has to pack your patience. Go to San Bernardino International Airport. Okay, enough shilling. Now it's time to get into a brand new episode of Klein Alley Show. This is the world famous K-Rock. Oh yeah, welcome to your weekend and good morning. It's just after 8 o'clock on a Friday.

We are Klein Alley Show. This is K-Rock. If you need us, phone us, text line. Same as yesterday, same as tomorrow, 800-520-1067 or 323-TIP-BOLY. Tip-Boly with an I. If you'd like to give us a call there on the local line. Of course, we've got lots to get into this hour. Perhaps the star of the show will be the dumb-op. Vanessa did want to let us all know she's feeling under the weather. A lot of times this time of year, kids go back to school and they get sick

because all the germs and everyone's touching the boogies and stuff. And somehow Vanessa, who claims she is an adult and not a child, has got the exact same thing that kids are getting now, which is that back-to-school cold. She was like, we should talk about tips on how to keep kids from getting sick while she, as an adult woman who doesn't go to school, gets sick. I think I mushed myself because I said that one day before, the next day sick. And I blame you guys. You are the ones with the kids in school.

I don't know how, but it came to me again. Now I have to miss my friend's birthday party because it's a, don't make fun of me, but it is her kid's birthday party that I missed last year because I got sick and I didn't go because I didn't want to get the kids sick. And I have to miss it again. You're always in bounce houses and stuff. And we ask you what you're doing and you claim you're going to kids' parties. I like my friend's kids and their aunt.

But you're doing the activities that are there for the children's. Like, are you smashing your cake or are you eating it in a... Okay, but let's talk about it. Have you been to a... I know you've been to a kid's party. There are snacks. There's something that's sad. I mean, the snacks are like applesauce pouches.

Oh, my gosh. It's like the crappiest pizza you've ever had. Well, there's adult snacks, too. Where is this kid's birthday party? Is it at, like, a gym or something? I don't know. I have to look at the invitation. A park?

I just thought I was going. It's definitely a park. So, Vanessa's got the same thing your kids probably have right now. No, I think it was a jumping thing. She's blaming Allie and I. It's a jumping thing. Meanwhile, I'm feeling as healthy as I've ever felt right now. My kid is healthy.

Yeah, I feel great. I mean, the kid broke their arm this week. But other than that, we're doing great at my house. Homer, are your kids sick yet or no? No, not yet. See, we're all great. You're the only kid who's sick. Who did this to me?

You did this to yourself because you're in all those jumpy castles or whatever. I haven't been in one in a while. Vanessa's so sad she's not going to get a goodie bag. So she just wants everyone to know that she is not going to be at her best during the dumb-off, which is coming up this hour on the show. Yeah, but 323 said Vanessa's about to have a Michael Jordan flu game. Oh, this could be your moment, Vanessa. You come in sick.

What happened to Michael Jordan? Oh, that's the first question in the dumb-off. He died during the flu game. It's a very sad story. It's funny because Vanessa wants everyone to know she's not a child. But she has asked me every day this week to include this in clickbait. And this question is, what is the real reason you're scared of going into your basement? I thought that was such a good one because it's relatable.

No, we don't have basements. A, not a lot of people have basements, but B, I think most of us are now past the point of being scared to go into a basement. Is anyone scared? For what's the real reason? Like that scary furnace from Home Alone? Yeah, so many.

We'll get into... The ghost is going to get me. We'll get into clickbait in a moment, so get ready to... That's not the question we're going to ask, so we'll solve the Internet's biggest riddles together in just a moment, and then the dumb-off can officially begin.

thoughts and prayers for sick Vanessa this morning on KRS. Internet design, two reasons, two reasons only. Clickbait masturbating only to one of them

on the radio. So it's time for Clickbait. Here we go. Babe, how would you like to have a, and I know the answer is going to be pretty strong

from Allie and Omar. How would you like to have an instantly happier wife? Instantly happier wife. I don't know. She's got it made. I don't think

she can be happier. Well, Sounds like she's got a lot of things that she's looking to do to be happy. To tap dancing, join the army, all that other crap. Her life's great. Wow. Okay. She works like 15 hours a week.

So maybe she should hear this. She gets massages. Maybe she should hear this question then. Yeah. There's something you could be doing right now to have an instantly happier wife. And you know that stupid expression, happy wife, BJ's later, whatever. Yeah, that's it. That rhymes.

So that's the thing, and I think that people need to know this, because if you're married, plan on being married, or maybe you are the wife, and you're like, I want to be instantly happier, so what could my partner be doing? What is something you could be doing right now, and should be doing, according to marital experts, to have an instantly happier wife? There's a couple things on the list, but there's one thing you could be doing as soon as immediately. giving them time to themselves saying hey you've had a hard day why don't you go take an hour to yourself why don't you go do this giving them permission you don't think that that comes back with oh you don't want to hang out with me you're sending me off to myself it sounds like that's how you'd be instantly happier that's how i would be i think most wives would love just a little solo time space space all right permission to have space and hey i'm thinking of you i want

you to be happy get the hell out of here hit the bricks as omar says that's what you're saying okay omar here's a retreat what do you think the answer is and then i will give you the answer and it may just save marriages all over the place you know i think it's going to be kind of like the opposite of what ali is saying i think if you tell your wife hey i have something planned uh for you know saturday evening or something like that they they instantly get all happy and giddy and are going to be looking forward to it especially if it's plans without the kids plans that you made effort that went into it i've i've already made the quote reservation i made the call that's almost says that they get into that this isn't relatable right i got it jake you're not

married nope don't ever want to be i don't think probably not right is that just because it hasn't happened or because you're determined that you don't think it's right for you? Both. Jake's one of those guys where they give the whole do you take this sickness and health and he's like, nah, nah, nah, there's a tool to help. You're sick, get away from me.

I've got tickets to Warm Uncle that night. Sorry you're sick. Sucks to suck. Sucks to suck would definitely go in his vows. Jake, what is the answer? I'm going to say either flowers, buying flowers or doing the dishes.

Or do anything like chores. Chores definitely would make the person happier. 626 says, keep her tummy full and her balls draped. Ew. That is not. That's a guy. That's a guy. That doesn't work the other way around.

And I think that was Allie's mom's advice, wasn't it? Yes. Isn't that what it is? Tummy full, balls empty. Yeah, that's the throat goat's advice. And the throat goat knows. And she's strong. So this is the opposite.

I think she did happy wife BJ's later, too. Yeah, she said that? I wish there was a female equivalent of full tummy, empty balls. But I feel like women would not like that as much as guys. No, I don't think so. We're simple. I think it's full shopping bag, empty baggage or whatever. The answer is kind of interesting because you danced around it.

Not Allie and not Jake, but Omar was dancing around it. It is planning something, putting the effort to plan something, but strategically it's planning something that you used to do together. because that is the thing that apparently shows multiple things. Remember that? Remember when we used to do that? I set time aside.

No, thanks. I got to empty your balls. When you do the planning something that you used to do together, it shows multiple things that instantly trigger two different zones that makes the woman happy. Thoughtfulness.

One that you've planned and two that you remembered or you put some sort of thought into something that you used to do. It's the combination of that which instantly, supposedly makes them happier. So you say, hey, remember that bar we met at? Let's go there.

Oh, wait, it just shut down. Yeah, or, you know, in my case, my wife will go, remember we used to do that? And then just moves on. There's no actual plan here, though. So think of something you used to do, preferably something they enjoyed, or at least you thought they enjoyed,

and then you plan it, and then boom. Right. Do you happen to know what was the reason we're scared to go in our basements? Can I just know what the answer was? I'm kind of curious. I have Vanessa's answer. Kind of dark and icky.

No, that's not the answer. Hold on. I have the answer. Vanessa wrote it down here. Someone said Monday morning we're going to do where the monster under your bed actually is from. Vanessa said the real reason you're scared to go into your basement, according to psychologists, is because you're tucked away. Basements can feel a little detached from the rest of the home, which makes them feel different. This is a good conversation to have with your parents if you're still scared.

Vanessa, where are you getting this stuff? Jesus Christ. We've got to take a break. When we get back, I can't believe it, but the dumb-off is here. I'm so excited. You have no idea. I know you're excited. We've got intros for everyone as well to get you ready for it.

Welcome to the 2026 Dumb-Off Finals. Oh, man, this is big. Production value. Get ready. Who will be the dumbest on the show? Place your bets. Will it be Ali? Will it be Johnny?

Will it be Sick Vanessa? The dumb-off finals happening next on KROQ. Celebrating stupidity every morning here on KROQ, especially during the back-to-school time of the year. This is, I believe, the third or fourth annual dumb-off that we've done here at KROQ. And as I said earlier, it's the fourth annual inaugural dumb-off, which is a pretty dumb thing to say, but that doesn't stop us from saying it anyway. We've got three contestants that have made their way to the finals because they represent the best and the worst of humanity. Allie is, she's, I don't know. I'm what?

What am I? Well, I just want to say that going into the competition, Allie's pregnant. She's got a pregnancy brain. Vanessa's sick. She's got a sick brain. And Johnny's Johnny. I've got no brain.

That's right. So we've got the sash of stupidity has been brought to the KROQ studios. If you don't believe us, this is happening in real time. You can watch their brains buckle under pressure. If you want to watch on YouTube, we're streaming there now as well. There's Allie holding the sash up. She's worn that sash before. That's the big dummy sash.

Years ago, it was Allie and Johnny who had to share the sash, wear it together, when they tied in the finals, and we have not had a tie since. But there's a lot on the line here. I mean, no one wants to be the dumbest on the show, right? There's nothing wrong with it. I mean, you guys made me that guy. You made yourself that guy. You made me that guy.

We didn't make you that guy, Johnny. Yeah, you did. It's the role you were born to play. So we have questions here. We'll get into it in a moment. But right now, let's go ahead and meet the contestants in the finals of the Dumb Off. Welcome to the 2026 Dumb Off Finals. contestant number one they are so dumb they have a prescription for a helmet

and don't even know what the word prescription means they have been challenged by stamps fellatio salad and basic 11 a.m. start times please welcome a two-time dumb off champion gay Leno aka postmaster dummy beautiful intro how How are you feeling? Anything you want to say before you compete in the Dumb Off finals? What does the 11 a.m. intro mean? When we talked about our meetings. You're confused about your intro?

When we talked about how our meetings start at 11 a.m. You guys don't even come in at 11. Yeah, we do. You guys are still in the studio. And you said, I don't know what that means. And we said, it means be here at 11. You're like, I don't understand what you guys are saying. And then you were like, I feel like we keep talking about this.

That was a difficult thing for you, but Johnny had a hard time figuring it out. We now say hi to our second contestant in the Dumb Off. Please welcome contestant number two. Contestant number two. English is not her first, second, or third language. She claims she's not dumb and actually one of the smartest kids in her class. She is four feet four inches of pure Colombian cocaine and chicken. And she once pooped her pants and didn't have underwear.

Please welcome former NASA employee and former Chuck E. Cheese mouse, producer Vanessa. Vanessa. I did have underwear on. What's that? I did have underwear. Oh, you did? I did. Well, then why did you say you didn't?

Redo the whole intro. I didn't realize. That's the only thing you have a gripe about? The other ones are ridiculous. Well, but the other ones are true. You did work at NASA. I'm not 4'4". Oh, you're not?

And I speak two languages. Yeah. So I'm the smartest one, actually. But this one's true. I pooped my pants and I don't have underwear. Yeah, that's you saying. I don't understand what that happened. You said it.

You don't understand your own statement? What did I say this? That's when you got really drunk and you said you pooped your pants and then you said you didn't have underwear. Yeah. And back in 2023. People are sitting in their cars now, not going into my job today until I hear this dumb off. I'm so excited. This is exciting.

I haven't been this excited since the Seinfeld finale, someone claims. Man, that's exciting. We can't get caught up in the intros. We've got to move forward. Come on, man. Moving on. We have one final intro because we do have one final contestant. And it's come down to three people.

You've met Vanessa. You've met Johnny. And now let's meet contestant number three. Contestant number three. She once got trapped in her underwear while trying to pull it over her head. Years earlier, she got stuck in a hula hoop and had to be rescued by the fire department. That's not true. She claims that she's not dumb, and the rest of us are just a bunch of stupid assholes.

She is a three-time dumb-off finalist, and a gross-off winner, and the meanest on the show. Please welcome the cankle queen, Allie Johnson. Wow, what a nice... Thank you. Thank you. It's funny, because Allie's offended, but also proud that she's got so many titles. Thank you. These are your contestants that will be battling it out in the dumb-off.

Please, everyone, get your paper out. Get your pens ready. And without any further ado or intros, it's time now for the Dumb-Off Finals. The Dumb-Off. All right, here we go. Write down your answers. Question number one. What is an antonym of scarce?

What is an antonym of scarce? Johnny's writing. Vanessa is starting. I wrote. Probably Googling. I'm not Googling. You Googling back there? There was a lot of people that speculated that yesterday during the tiebreaker question,

Johnny was on his phone to answer that question. They saw it happen on YouTube Live. So everyone on YouTube was watching. Make sure there's no cheating in question two. Damn. If you're in a race and you run past the person in second place, what place are you now in? We get this question every year. You've never gotten it right, Johnny.

Say it again one more time. If you're in a race, you run past the person in second place. What place are you now in? Question three. It's the Dumb All Finals on KROQ. A farmer has 17 sheep. All but nine run away. How many sheep remain?

Can you repeat that? Sorry. I was distracted. A farmer has 17 sheep. All but nine run away. How many remain? this is the dumb off finals

thank you Jake what would be heavier to carry 10 pounds of cotton balls or 10 pounds of cinder blocks what would be heavier to carry the cotton balls or the cinder blocks we go to your next question

say goodbye in three languages say goodbye in three languages? Next question. A man dies on his 25th birthday. Oh, Jesus Christ. Hold on. Let him cook.

Let him cook. Go ahead. He's 25? A man dies on his 25th birthday. The official cause of death was old age. How is this possible? A man?

Okay, one more time. Yeah, what kind of man? A human man? A human man. Thank you, Allie. Is that your answer? A human man dies on his 25th birthday. Cause of death officially was old age.

How is this possible? It is a human, right? You've said this five times. It's a goddamn human man. Hispanic? Italian? Does not matter for the purpose of this, Johnny. Interesting.

Make him however you want to make him. Yeah, draw him, though. And draw him. Yeah. Next question. And then birthday is actually a hospital room? No. Oh, yeah.

There's probably some stupid crap like that. It's birthday of his mother. Stupid. All right, next question. How many questions are we doing? Yeah, can we do like eight only? No, there's ten. Oh, man.

That's a problem for you guys? Yeah, there's too many questions. What can you hold without ever touching it? What can you hold without ever touching it? Two more questions. There's two more questions? That's right. What starts with a T, ends with a T, and has T in it?

And your final question, the dumb-off. Starts with T, ends with T, and has a T in it? Yep. Has T in it. Has T in it? Yep. Starts with T, ends with T, has T in it. Final question.

A man walks three miles north. Oh, my God. These questions at the beginning were so great. Hey, girls, let's just veto this one, not answer it. Nah, this is so easy. Boycott. Yeah, boycott. Vanessa, you want to boycott this one, too?

A man walks three miles north, three miles east, and three miles south. How far is he from where he started? Okay, wait, wait, wait. Okay, three miles. North. Uh-huh. Three miles east and three miles south. How far is he from where he started?

Again, super easy. These are not difficult questions. Okay. Is everyone happy? Okay, yep. Can I get a repeat, please, of number six? Yeah, what was six? I left that one blank, too.

That said birthday one. Number six is the man. How does a man celebrate his 25th birthday? He dies on his 25th birthday. The cause of death was old age. How is this possible? Super easy. Everyone happy now?

Okay. So we did nine questions Yeah, what's the tenth one? The tenth one is a tiebreaker if needed So I'm not going to ask that one Come back, everyone's going to look over their answers No texting We'll come back with the results next

K-Rock line alley show About to get to the exciting conclusion Of this year's dumb off And we've really raised the production value this year We have musical interludes as well And as we celebrate the stupidity on the show Here they are, the dumbest on the show They sound like they're high, but their IQ is low

It's the Dumb-Off The Dumb-Off Let's get to the exciting conclusion of the Dumb-Off. That's pretty good. Who gets to wear the sash of stupidity. Very exciting. Nice. All right.

Allie, how are you feeling before we get to the answers? Well, I'm upset, but let's just move on. Shaku, what are the odds you're upset? Vanessa, how are you feeling about all that? Fair? Fair is fair? Like, definitely got some of them wrong, but hopefully some of them right. Right, it's all about just not losing.

And Johnny, you're looking at your paper scratching your head a lot. Well, as a dumb off champion, I've experienced a lot of these questions before, so I'm pretty confident in them. Really? Yeah, on like four of them, he repeated in previous years. Yeah, but Johnny has been known to... And he knew we wouldn't go back and listen to those old episodes.

That's right. Or remember. Because we can't find them. All right, here we go. Question number one. This is the exciting conclusion of the dumb-off. What is an antonym of scarce? John, we'll start with you. Abundant. Vanessa, what'd you put down?

A lot. Uh-huh. Allie? Plenty. All right, both of you, all you get the points on that one. We all wrote different words, though. Yeah, interesting. Well done.

You guys got that. One on the board early. Woo! You run past the person in second place in a race. What place are you now in, Allie? Second place. Johnny? Second place.

Vanessa? I put first. Because, okay, because you're passing the second person, so you're first. No. No, now you're second because obviously you're in third, so now you're in second place. That was a question that tripped up some people last year, and Vanessa is now first to get a point in the finals of the dumb-off. And points are not good here. We go to your next question.

Vanessa's up one. A farmer has 17 sheep. All but nine run away. How many remain? Vanessa, we'll start with you. Eight. Oh, boy. Oh, damn.

Johnny? I put all. Another repeat from, like, previous years. Come on with the memory. Who remembers questions? That's also wrong, Johnny. Allie? I put nine.

That is the right answer. Ah, damn it. It was nine. All but nine remain, which means... I couldn't remember because I was like, it was one of those trick ones where it was like, no, you need all of them because he says all. Right. Well, anyway.

I'm curious, Vanessa, how you came up with eight. Because I'm an eight. She subtracted. 17 minus nine. She subtracted. Thought it was basic subtraction. It's funny that Johnny and Vanessa both got that wrong for very different reasons. Yes.

I don't know how Johnny came up with all is a better question. I was like, ah, he said he started off with all. I was like, it's got to be all. I thought you were lecturing Vanessa, like, God, don't worry, I got this. Yeah. It's all. It's an even more wrong answer. Vanessa has two, and Johnny has one as we go to this next question.

What would be heavier to carry? 10 pounds of cotton balls or 10 pounds of cinder blocks? Vanessa. They're the same weight. Allie. Same weight. Same weight. All right.

Johnny got that question wrong three different years, so he's finally learned something. It took us that long for him to figure that out. Woo! Next question. Can you say goodbye in three different languages? Allie. Goodbye, adios, and au revoir. Johnny.

I said adios, ciao, and arrivederci. Nice. You didn't even go with English. That's interesting. Duh. Vanessa. Okay, I put three, but my question is, I didn't put goodnight because, like, you're saying, can you say goodnight in three different languages? Goodbye, not goodnight.

Oh, I heard goodnight. Damn. Wedge, you know what? I did say, which is funny, because I put ciao, which is bye, adios, which is bye, but then I also put bonui, which is goodnight. What? This is my sick brain. What? Oh, boy.

Bonne nuit is good night, which also means goodbye, because I'm going to bed. So you said goodbye, goodbye, good night? Yeah. Vanessa, I can't give you the point on that. Come on, I'm a headache. We go to your next question. This one really bothered a lot of people. A man dies on his 25th birthday.

The cause of death was old age. How is this possible? Johnny, we'll start with you. I put abortion. Oh, interesting. I like it. I mean, just for that answer alone, Johnny should win the double. Sorry, trigger warning, but like, I don't know.

Like the op trigger warning. I put newborn slash abortion, and I was just like, I think it's abortion. I'd love you to explain that. That's a very late, late term abortion. That's like the opposite. Well, you didn't say 25 years old. It could be 25 days old. How long has it been in there?

Allie, what'd you put? I am just going to take the L. Oh, come on. You don't even have an answer? I wrote that it was his fourth 25th birthday. What does that mean? Like, it's his 25th birthday, but it's his fourth anniversary of his 25th birthday. Jake, is this hard?

No. It's really not, right? Vanessa, please tell me you got the answer. I just guessed. I'm like 100. You just put 100? Yeah. Well, now I'm curious if I'm right, but I'm pretty sure I am.

Well, but Vanessa, explain 100. A man dies on his 25th birthday. Cause of death was considered old age. How is this possible? You wrote 100? Oh, wait. It's like, if it, 100. Wait, sorry.

He was born in, like, 1200 B.C. or something when there was, like, cavemen and animals. So, like, life expectancy wasn't that long back then. You're overthinking it. Oh, that's a good answer. You know what I mean? His birthday is on February 29th. Oh, stupid. I knew it.

So, he is 100 at the age of death. So, Vanessa figured that out. Hell, yeah. Yeah, and I just guessed, baby. But you kind of didn't. Yeah, that was wrong. She was way off. I feel like you just picked a number.

Yeah. Give her that. And I chose the right one, 100. Give her the word. Guys, we're down to this. It's not looking good for Vanessa. Wait, so did she get it right? The answer is leap year.

Yeah, leap year is the answer. Oh, I thought you said the answer was 100. Yeah, he's born on a leap year, so technically it's his 25th birthday. He's 100 years old. No, no, no. I'm right. I put 100. Vanessa's right.

Thank you. What can you hold without ever touching it? Johnny. I didn't answer it. Allie? I put your breath. That is correct. Vanessa?

Yes. Okay, it's pretty close to breath. Air. You can hold air. I think we should give her that one. Vanessa, we'll give you that as well. I was going to say air, but I was like, that's not even an answer. Johnny, no answer, which means you are now...

Well, because I was going to say air is not an answer. You can't hold it, or you can't touch it. It's your breath. You can't touch air. That room is holding it right now. Johnny, this is not looking good for you, Johnny. You can't touch air. Johnny, what's the technicality?

Hold on. Yeah, you can hold your breath, but you can't touch air. What starts with a T, ends with a T, and has T in it? Allie. I put teat. Come on. Come on. Seriously?

I'm right. Starts with T, ends with T, and it has the word T in it. Vanessa? A tent. Jesus Christ. When you build a tent, there is a stick that creates a T. And it starts with T, ends with T, and inside of it, when you build it, there's a T.

I wish I came up with a stupid answer too. Johnny, what'd you say? I put TNT. Oh my God. There's a TN inside of it like you said and T. I think we all have great answers. It's a teapot.

Stupid ass question, dog. Stupid ass question. You've gotten it wrong. T is not right. And TNT because it says TNT like you just said in the question. You're all wrong. I think we're all creative and came up with alternative answers.

Yeah, you got it all wrong. All wrong. And this final question could determine who wins and who loses, guys. I have lost count, but I think that it's between Vanessa and Johnny now. Allie, let's throw you in the mix. A man walks three miles north, three miles east, and three miles south. How far is he from where he started? I put three miles.

Vanessa, what did you put? Three miles. Johnny? Wow, I have three miles written down, too. All right, that is the right answer. Woo! Whoa. So at the end of it all, I think we can agree.

Allie is the dumbest, right? No, I'm not. I only got two wrong. Sadly, it is, I believe, and Omar, correct me if I'm wrong, Johnny and Vanessa have an almost identical score right now. Yeah, I think we have to go to the tiebreaker. Which means we have to go to the tiebreaker. Wait, how many did you get wrong, Johnny?

Yeah, you kind of messed me up because you didn't count. You gave her the point for 100 and then you took me away for the whole you can't touch air. Guys, this is the last question. This will determine who wears the sash of stupidity. Take this seriously. This is BS. A man shaves several times a day, but still has a full beard. Who is he?

God, I'm so glad I don't have to answer this. Who is he? What? A man shaves several times a day, but still has a full beard. Who is he? This will be the determining question. There will be one person standing high atop the Mount Rushmore of stupidity. Will it be Vanessa, who is sick?

Will it be Johnny, who's got brain damage? I think they're going to tie again. Yeah, this is going to be a tiebreaker. Yeah, how are they going to get it there, but neither of them are going to get this right. Yeah, they're going to be wearing that sash together. It's happened before. Are you ready? Yep.

Okay. What'd you write? Klein. I thought that was a great answer. Yeah. And you set yourself up for that one, too. You shave several times a day, and you're still hairy? Didn't you shave this morning?

Look at you. Yeah. Yeah, but it's not a full... I'm not the answer. That's the damn answer, Ruff. I'm not a full beard. Who am I? Jesus.

Vanessa. Okay. I think a swimmer. Swimmer Or a captain Terrible question The answer guys Is a barber

A barber A barber You have another one? Well listen That's it It's come down to a tie And it's the back room The chicken coop

Here's our song That we've been so excited Guys wear the sash together She's sick I don't want to be that close You gotta stand with her This is a great moment now Everyone gather around

And text your dumbest friend The dumb off Has officially come to an end with a tie and it's the people responsible for his pregnancy the least thing wrong inside her brain her stupid answers leave us stupefied and tame look at them vanessa has a language barrier so she has an excuse johnny has no excuse for his answers so obtuse here they are the dumbest on the show they sound like they're high but their iq is low it's the dumb off the dumb off congratulations to all participants

well played all right uh more fun alley show after this on k-rock All right, let's get into your ADD News, and then a brand-new hour of the show will begin. First thing we do when that hour starts is get you your tickets so you can go to, excuse me, passes to go to Just Like Heaven. I don't know why they're caught up on that word, but regardless, that's what you're getting. So you will get them from us the second we're done with this, your news. Grab your Adderall. It's time for ADD News. You may have heard this story earlier this week about a man in a Chucky mask terrorizing innocent people on the street.

there is an update on this and a connection to california but this is what was happening in philly this week it's not good that's about us so he's wearing a chucky doll halloween style face mask i want to warn you this this story's a little scary so this morning the search is on for a masked man accused of harassing and threatening people in philadelphia he was running up to people trying to scare and antagonize them and in one case he chased a woman while she was jogging and repeatedly asked her are you ready to die terrifying they did find him at one point and they ordered him to remove his mask and he did but then he ran away and they were not able to catch him so they're saying he there's a obviously a be on the lookout for this guy they're trying to find

him but now that he removed his mask they know who he is and he's also wanted in california and nevada for the same thing so this guy is like a serial mask chaser and i thought we had to wait Wait till September, October to hear these mask weird person creep stories. Just like Costco with the decorations. It's all happening earlier. Started doing it earlier. All these creepy mask guys running up to you. Vanessa sent me this story and said that this has been really scaring her all week.

This is why you don't go in the basement. People like this, right? But that is a scary story. Very, very scary. Very scary. Well, if someone was chasing me in public and asking me if I wanted to die in a mask, I mean, that definitely would freak me out. But then you would also think, ah, it's Halloween.

This is just maybe a weirdo, not an actual murderer. Like, if that happened in March, I think I'd be more scared than if it happened in September or October. The scariest part of that story is that person went out jogging by choice. That's my biggest fear at all. In Philadelphia, it's hot as hell there. Forget about the mass part. I'd be scared if I was out jogging. Do you have sunshine guilt?

It is sunny and beautiful outside, but all you want to do is hole up in your bedroom and watch Sandra Bullock movies. And you might feel guilty about that. It happens to the best of us. It is called sunshine guilt, or some people call it summer guilt. It's that feeling that you're wasting a beautiful day by staying inside. It's pretty common, and you can also call it shoeshine. I'm pretty sure it's white guilt is what that is. It's just regular old good old-fashioned white guilt.

If that's what you're guilty about, is that you don't go out. People say that all the time when I want to sit at home and just watch football all day. It's beautiful outside. It's so nice outside. That's great. You know what's even nicer? Right here on this couch with football on. Well, and I know that it's a little different here, but there's this obligation that we should be outside.

We should be enjoying the weather. We should be doing something, even though you don't want to. We get that a lot. We're spoiled by it. I've lived in parts of the country where it's nice for one month of the year, maybe. I know, and people are outside every day, all day. And you do feel like you want to take advantage of that. And when the weather finally is nice, even like living in New York City, a lot of the weather there sucks.

But then every once in a while, you get this crazy nice day. You're like, I probably should go out and walk around. Oh, man. We would just lay out on like even a small patch of grass just all day on days like that when I lived in New York. But here, you get it most days, right? So a part of it, though, is social media. They say it gives you this element of FOMO that if you're not out doing something, you're lame. There's a pressure to be fun.

There's a social expectation. And we're in this productivity culture that we always need to be getting after it, that we shouldn't just be sitting at home watching TV. That's why I think people actually love when it rains here, which is rare, but when it happens, it takes away all that guilt where you're like, I can actually not feel bad about staying home and binge watching something. I think in L.A. there is a winter that happens in the middle of summer where it's so hot that I can't leave the house. You are just holed up in your place because you can't go anywhere or do anything because it's too effing hot. If you had to repeat a grade in school, that was likely not your choice to do so. But now people are doing it intentionally to get more learning in for sure. But they're mainly doing it for sports.

Did your parents ever say, you better get your grades up, little lady, or you're going to repeat eighth grade? A little lady? I heard that a lot. I said, Dad, stop calling me little lady. If you don't get your grades up, you're going to be a little lady. I'm going to make you a little lady forever. 13-year-olds are doing it by choice, hoping to get into a better school, a bigger scholarship, or more NIL money. I play baseball because I love the game, but it's cool to know that if I do what I love, I'll get a little bit of money out of it.

That sounds like a little lady. That's a little lady, all right. I love baseball because of the ball. Little lady needs her nuts to drop. But they say that it's a lot of delusional parents saying my kid is going to make it to the MLB. And if I have I give him an extra year to repeat eighth grade and get better at it, because once you're in high school, you're on the clock. You have four years to get as good as possible before you get some kind of a scholarship and that kind of thing. So this kid thinks that he's going to eventually be in the MLB.

So his parents are going, okay, well, then we're going to give you as much time as possible to stay in school and practice and get better so that you have a leg up from all these other kids. Yeah, the odds are still stacked against you. I mean, it's like 1%. Right. But listen, you have to be delusional. Anyone who does anything that's amazing at some point was delusional before they ended up doing that thing. Yeah, you put all your eggs in that one basket, but most of the time, you're not good enough. And then when you put all your eggs in that basket, you got no other life.

Those are inspirational words from Allie this morning, kids. That's what I did. Now look at me. Like, why even put those eggs in that basket? Why even bother calling us right now? Because you're probably not going to be caller 20. But if you are, oh, if you are. You're going to be that 1%, baby.

You've got passes tomorrow to go to Just Like Heaven, Brookside, the Rose Bowl. See some strokes and many more. And I'm looking for you, caller 20, now. Let's go ahead and be delusional. Get through now. KROQ.