Klein/Ally Show: The Podcast - HOUR 3- Ally's Plane Ride, Johnny Doesn't Know and MORE

Episode Date: July 31, 2026

About to get into a brand new episode of Klein Alley Show, but first let's tell you about our good friends at the finest airport that ever was and ever will be. The San Bernardino International Airport. Especially when there's summer travel plans, it can get expensive at these airports. That's why you gotta go to this airport where parking is just five bucks a day. Plus you got those easy trips, San Francisco or Provo, Utah. Maybe you didn't plan anything this summer. See how easy it is. Don't be one of those people who has to pack your patience. Go to San Bernardino International Airport. Okay, enough shilling. Now it's time to get into a brand new episode of Klein Alley Show. This is the world famous K-Rock. Oh yeah, good morning and welcome to your weekend. It is Friday. We are Klein Alley Show.

It is just after 9 o'clock, which means summer ticket blowout time has officially begun all day long. Every hour you get into all the big shows. We have Foo Fighters for you. One hour from right now, but if you are currently trying to get through, hopefully you're a fan of Death Cab and you'll get to go to one of those shows coming up at the Greek. and we make that happen for the 20th caller right now at 800-520-1067. My name's Klein. That is Allie. Morning. We've got Jake the Nerd over there.

He's considered a loser this week for multiple reasons, but particularly because he just lost the driving test. And a video's been posted on our Instagram, and I didn't realize this, but apparently Jake took his entire driving test barefoot. I cannot believe. That's illegal. Which is not only... It's illegal. You can't drive barefoot.

It's illegal to drive barefoot, but more importantly, You did it not even in your own car. You went in this man's car and took your flip-flops off and drove barefoot, which should have been a big violation right out of the gate. I mean, just on a social level. Forget about even the rules of the road. No, it's not illegal to drive barefoot. I always thought it was.

With your feet, I think it is. I'm telling you. You're wrong. Somebody will tell the cop when they pull you over. Yeah, anyway. How are they going to pull me over? Listen, all I know is you made a terrible decision right out of the gate. You lost the test. You'll be spending some time next week in the DMV, and we'll get to all of that coming up.

But it's terrible, terrible. If you're new to the show, nice to meet you. In the back taking your calls right now, you've got producer Vanessa and postmaster Johnny, and they're counting to 20 as fast as they possibly can, which puts us on. Sean in Long Beach. Good morning, Sean. Yeah, good morning. Let's go. Sweet divots. Sweet divots to you. You're a winner. You're going to the Greek. You're going to see Death Cab. Congratulations. Those tickets are as good as yours. Awesome. Thank you so much.

Thank you for starting your day right here with us on KROQ. Hang on one second. If your name is not Sean from Long Beach and you're feeling like a loser right now, don't worry. We'll make it up to you this hour, and we will get you those Foo Fighters tickets in less than an hour as KROQ's summer ticket blowout continues all day long. And we give you Evanescence because that's what we do these days. And then we're back with more show in three minutes on KROQ. KROQ, we are a fine alley show.

You can find us on the radio, you can find us on the podcast, or you can find us on YouTube. Klein, Allie, gosh, you guys have such a fantastic show. I'm glad you guys still kept the summer hours past summer. Anyways, I decided for some odd, strange reason, not out of torture, but just because, I decided to go down to Allie and Klein rabbit hole on the YouTube, and I found some pretty interesting stuff. I found some stuff you guys did about 10 years ago up in the northern half of this fine state. Let's never speak of that again.

I hope that that didn't exist. And the problem with the Internet is they say once it's up there, it's up there forever. There's no getting rid of it. And one of the videos had you guys stripping, which— I don't remember this, but apparently there's a video of us stripping. God, we were desperate and horny. Yeah, desperate and horny. And not much has changed all these years later.

So, anyway, thank you for finding us on YouTube. Go to CareX YouTube and you can check out the show daily as it unfolds before your very eyes and ears. You know, after the show, I am driving over to Burbank Airport and hopping on a plane to see my mother in Colorado. Do you feel like you travel a lot? It's too much. Why are you doing this so much to yourself? It seems exhausting. Well, my kid has a couple weeks from between preschool and starting real school.

And we don't really have coverage. so my wife and kid were going to go over to visit my mom and just stay there for a week because we don't have any help here at home. And then it was like, ah, I guess I'll... It's easier to get on a plane and fly to family than just sit around your house? Well, my mom was going to come out,

and then she was like, I really want you... They just got their house. They just got into their new house. They want us to see the house and all this crap. I can't even imagine how many times they've christened every room in the house at this point. Oh, yeah, Steve needs his medicine. But she really wants us to go out there in the summer,

see what it's like, and so she offered for us to go out and visit instead of her come out. Weren't you just with your mom in Hawaii like a month ago? Yes, I was. We were questioned about all this from our in-laws last night. It seems so unnecessary. It's a lot.

Like, aren't you not even supposed to fly? Aren't you so pregnant you shouldn't fly? No, apparently it's fine. I checked that. I was like, I don't think I can. And they were like, yeah, you can. And I was like, damn. So I'm just going for the weekend.

They're going for a week. I just checked in. My mom was the one who organized the flights. I go to check in. i realized that she got katie and wesley's tickets separately than mine so when i check in i realize i am sitting not with them they are seated together what a score for you and i am seated separately and my question for you is should i say anything should i let this play out should i be who the airline or your wife either oh she doesn't know she hasn't told her yet oh

i checked us in and i realized oh i'm sitting in 25 f which is a window seat by the way Bad row, but good seat. I got a window. And they're up in row five, but Katie's got a middle, and then she's going to be right next to our kid. Man, what a win for you, by the way. That you get, I mean, I know back, you know, people like to be in front of the plane, I guess. I don't think, especially Burbank. Of course, you like to be.

Yeah, back, no, I like back of the, Burbank, I like back of the plane because you can climb on the back. You feel like. But I'm boarding group eight. Whoa, that's so low. I didn't even know they had that many boarding groups. That is unbelievable. They do letters first, too, and then they go to numbers, and you're eight? Man, that sucks for you.

That's bad, and this is Southwest. Yeah, they've got the new system now. Yeah, they've got the new system, which sucks. So I'm unsure if I should go to the counter and say, hey, we're a family. Can we sit together and have them try and rearrange some stuff? Why would you do that? You've got a flight, no-kid flight. What's that, a three-hour flight to Colorado?

Yeah, two and a half hours. You could do anything you want to. So if I go on the plane, and I'm like, oh, no, what's going on? Yeah, I'm surprised. What? We're not sitting together. Oh, I miss you. Here's my question.

Do you think your wife, who is the Jedi Master, is going to somehow pull some sort of maneuver where you will be the one sitting with your son and she will take your seat in 24F? And she'll say something like, yeah, you're going to really miss this moment with him, but okay. And then you're going to be like, you know what? I want to do it. Well, I wonder if it's going to be, well, I'm going to be with him pretty much alone for a week taking care of him. You're going to have the week to yourself. So this is going to be, yeah, your last chance to really see him.

Yeah. And, you know, I'm the one who was packing everything this morning while you were at work. I'm so tired. Yeah, all that stuff was going to be. But if she's caught in the moment, if we're in the middle of boarding, I feel like she won't be able to come up with that right away. If I tell her now, that'll be happening. I know people, when they get on planes, they try to do the trade-sies with people because they go, hey, do you mind if I sit with my family and you sit here and you sit here? And it gets really screwy.

But you can't pull that trade-sie situation if some of you are in row 5 and some of you are in row 24. Exactly. I don't have a lot to work with here. It's very different if you're like row five and seven and you do a couple of, hey, you want to sit here? I sit here. You're, I think you're cooked, but the fact that you know about this and haven't told her is kind of funny because you could have dealt with this yesterday or you could have

made an attempt to deal with it. But the way it is now with most airlines, if you don't want to pay extra for a seat assignment, they just, you just go assign us wherever. They always say, we'll do our best to figure it out. But as is evident right now, they didn't do their best because you guys are separated by 20 rows. No, I know. We are 20, 20 rows apart.

I mean, I think that's the sweet spot for keeping you calm on a flight is be 20 rows away from your own child. That's the sweet spot. And then when your kid cries, go, ugh. Who's an annoying kid is that? Shut that kid up or throw him off the plane. And then when they go to the bathroom, just going to ignore him when they walk by. It's funny because you could have in that row where your wife and kid are, you could

have all of the things people hate most. You could have, this woman's drinking, this woman's drinking a ridiculous amount and there's a kid who won't shut up. I know. And you don't have to deal with it. I don't have to deal with any of that. Yeah. And then the only drawback is that I'm group eight.

But I think if I say, hey, I'm with them. No, they don't care about that. I can get on with them. They're in probably group one or two. I think, though, Southwest, most airlines, I know your kid's not under two anymore, but he could still probably pull it off. They still do the anyone who needs extra time to board as kids under two. I think you still get to board after active military. Or was your son active military?

Yeah, he is. Okay, great. He is in the context of this. So he's a hero. Make sure he wears a camouflage. Everyone else said, I put a little pin on him. If they are overbooked, Allie should volunteer her seat. I should be the last person who's like, all right, I'm going to get 500 bucks.

You get off the flight all together. Then they have to do it. I just hop off. You just hop off. You get yourself a little credit. And then I start taking off. I just text like, love you. You just wave at them from the airport.

Bye. Thank you for your service. I'm going to eat. Coming up a little bit later this hour, your chance to win your way into a water park and beat the heat because apparently the hottest days are happening right now and they lay ahead and I don't know how he I think we have to blame Canada for this usually I feel like Canada is responsible something happened there and as a result we get weird weather here but it's going to be scorching hot and we will let you cool off in a water park with a cabana private cabana food

drink all the lazy rivering and water slides you can handle thanks to our friends at Wild Rivers in Irvine we have those tickets for you coming up with a round of Johnny Doesn't Know and that'll be in moments if you'd like to call and play that game but we we were talking about something that was interesting and Ali I know you are a big defender of the fact that you have no shame in the fact that even though you are a lady with your own child and other child on the way that you are still on your mom's calling plan yeah my mom's phone I've never paid a cell phone bill and you over I understand that this is a privilege that a lot of people don't get to take advantage it's a privilege that some parents if you're nice enough to have parents that help you out at all

usually when you turn 18 or maybe a little after they just cut you right off and say good luck being an adult you're on your own and when I graduated college that was the case it was like all right this is on you you went to acting school right you figure it out you made the terrible decision now act like getting a job and get a job but and I had a million of them Allie says the other day she was at Costco and she overheard the people that are out there trying to sell you internet and phones which always happens the AT&T guy and he was in a group of people walked by that she you Allie claims she thinks they were in their 30s oh yeah they were a millennial couple and they said hey what do you do for a cell phone provider and they said we're

still on our parents plan and this has become a thing now where more than ever before because of how unaffordable life has become more people more adults are still having things that are either completely paid for or getting supplemented by their parents yeah i know that there are a lot of adults that are still living at home too that's become a big trend but i i'm just curious as to what other things people's parents are still paying for if it goes beyond a cell phone or how many people out there are still on their parents cell phone plans because it seems to be a lot of people even vanessa's still on her mom's plan yes i am but i will say i do pay my half i do pay my wait a minute wait wait you're on your mom's plan vanessa but you throw money her way for

the cell phone bill yeah i was like mom i should pay for half so you're not so then you're not on it no i am on her family plan but if you're paying but if you're paying half then that's just you're doing the right thing you you're not ali's not offered to pay any money thing is if i would have done this by myself it would have been way more because i'm in the family plan no i get it and and uh that's why some people claim that they do it they go yeah i know it's not cool and i'm still paying for my adult child's phone but it'd be it'd be more expensive if i cut them loose than if i kept them in oh with my mom and her husband and all the kids we were all we're all on their plans but you're on the teat you don't want to get off the teat because once you're off

the teat then all of a sudden you've got more bills coming your way exactly and we were trying to explain that it is much cheaper for them if we bundle and they were like i don't think you understand how the cell phone bill works that's not the case i remember a conversation with my parents at one point when they just wanted to inform me that i would be uh off of their i don't know what i was on their insurance until a certain age health insurance and then they just said i just need to let you know that in like three months you are no longer on our health insurance and you can either make the choice of figuring out what that would cost for you to remain on it and pay that or you got to go ahead and get insurance through whatever job you have

And that's an annoying feeling because that's one of those things you don't even think about spending money on. You're no longer a dependent. Being a dependent is great. Being independent sucks. That sucks. 626 said, I'm 37 and I'm on my mom's Verizon plan. That's why when I call, Johnny keeps calling me Julie. Oh, yeah.

Well, that's the downside of being on someone's plan is that sometimes your phone does always come up as your mom's name. You tease them sometimes, too. I'll be like, oh, so your mommy pays the bills. They're like, eh, foo-choo. You don't have to say that to all of our listeners. Look, if you get the perk, milk it, you know, and Vanessa saying, hey, I should do the right thing and pay my share. Don't defer.

How many parents do you think do not know? Like how many parents I would imagine, wouldn't you say billions of dollars are being spent by parents that are unaware that their kids are still getting like something covered? My sister got, has gotten so many upgrades on her phone. I don't think my mom has known about any of them and they incorporate into her bill. like there's a monthly fee that goes on with the phone that she bought you know it's like paying this much over two years that's all added to the bill my mom has no idea i had a friend that had a um that was taking care of their parents dog their parents moved into a place and they could not take

care of the dog they weren't allowed to bring the dog so they gave the dog to my friend and they said we are going to give you a credit card with the dog to cover all of the dog related expenses only and my friend figured out that if he just went to places that sounded like dog places every expense would go under the radar so he started lazy dog that restaurant so he started doing all of his clothing shopping at rag and bone he started going to like lazy dog the restaurant anything that had dog in the name he put it into his life and he was able to live a pretty good life almost completely under the radar on his parents credit card and they just kept seeing the expenses and assumed all of them were dog related, that they had a very expensive

dog, a very expensive dog. 909 said they just got kicked off their mom's phone bill a month ago. That's rough when your parents like, hey, you know what? It's over. It's done. And that's a very sobering moment for you. So be aware because I know more and more people now are attempting to do it. And once you get off, it's hard to get back on because that's the other thing that people

are pointing out is that I was out of the house. I had moved out. I had my own place and then things got expensive and moved back in. 5-6-2-6 said, my father-in-law passed away three years ago, and it's still cheaper to keep him on our family plan. That's right. So we pay his cell phone bill, and he's dead. That's amazing. You call the place, you go, hey, he's dead.

They go, well, that's going to raise your rate $80 a month. Never mind, he's alive. He's doing fine. So keep in mind, before you decide to go full independent, there's a benefit to it. And understandably, the sharing of passwords for things like Netflix and Hulu, that's all been around. That's family. That's what family's about. Family's about.

And then there's the rub on that. If you'd like to win something from us now, and all you have to do is figure out if Johnny knows the answer to various easy questions, give us a call, 800-520-1067. We get you to a water park with a little round of Johnny Doesn't Know, which is happening next on KROQ. KROQ here, Klein Alley Show. We're going to figure out if Johnny knows answers to easy questions in honor of Alley's pregnancy.

We did tease him that we would be getting into a full round of female anatomy, and today's the day that we figure out exactly what Johnny knows and does not know about ladies. Now, Johnny does claim to be a swordsman, and he has a girlfriend that he lives with right now, but yet whenever Allie mentions anything that she's got going on with her body, Johnny seems completely unaware of the terms she uses or the parts she's talking about, and he has gotten a lot wrong, including him trying to explain how he thinks Allie got pregnant, which was all asked backwards, too. He also thought that a sonogram was how you measure speed in the ocean. Right, so there's a lot of problems here, and we're going to get into it, so I just want you to know all of that before you start to predict whether or not he will know the answers to these questions in this very exciting round of Johnny Doesn't Know.

Johnny doesn't know. And I was like, okay. Oh, Johnny doesn't know. I didn't know Vegas was like in Nevada for like a while. Johnny doesn't know. Johnny doesn't know. Gelato sounds like Jell-O. Johnny doesn't know.

It like goes, wiggles. Johnny, you know what gelato is now, right? We've asked you that question multiple times. You've never given us the right answer. Yeah, gelato is cream. Oh, man. The cold cream. It's cold cream.

That's not one of the questions today, so don't worry about it. It's the fourth time we've asked him. Jesus. It's cold cream. What do you mean cold cream? It's like cold cream. It's like a treat. It's Italian.

Gelato. Kai eats it all the time. I bet Kai does eat cream all the time. He does cream all the time. All right, so we go to our first contestant. And by the way, you're playing for a cabana, food and beverage, 100 bucks worth, and an entire day of memories to be made at Wild Rivers Water Park so you can beat the heat. And that's happening in Irvine, and we hope you win.

And everyone who gets theirs right will be, Allie, I'll write your name down. One of you is going to be selected to win that grand prize. In this round of Johnny Doesn't Know Women, we say hi to a woman on line number eight from Pomona. This is Vanessa. Good morning, Vanessa. Good morning, Johnny and Allie. Will Johnny know the name of the thing around the nipple? I'm not talking about the skittle in the middle, but I'm talking about the thing around the nipple.

Will Johnny know what that is called? Yes or no? The thing around the nipple, what it's called. Ooh, that's a hard one. Will he know? Yeah, I think he will. You think he's going to know this? Yeah.

All right, Johnny. Wait, why are we glossing over the fact that you just said skittle in the middle? Well, because I'm not referring to the Skittle. We're talking about the area around. And she says she thinks you will know the name of it, Johnny. And once again, Johnny, do you know the name, official name of the area around the nipple? Yes. The circle around the nipple is called the areola.

And sometimes when they're really big, they're called pepperoni nipples. But that's not what we're calling it. That's not clinical. It's not clinical. and not as cool as Skittle in the middle. That's what my doctor said at my last ultrasound. I see you've grown your pepperoni nipples, which means the baby's growing just fine.

Johnny, one second. Good job. Vanessa, hold on. You got yours right. Johnny knew that. We move to Amber, another lady. Hopefully the women know the answers to these questions because it's about their bodies.

And we say hi to Amber in Garden Grove. Will Johnny know the answer to this question about the female anatomy? What is the primary function of the ovaries? Will Johnny know this, yes or no? What do you think, Amber? I'm going to say no. Okay.

Johnny, what is the primary function of the ovaries? She doesn't think you're going to know. What are you doing with your fingers? I'm thinking. Like, you look smarter when you put your fingers together like this. I thought he was trying to make a vagina with his hand. Didn't it look like that, Amber? I mean, that's funny, too, though.

What is the primary function of the ovaries? Well, I have two answers, but I think there's only one function of the ovaries. It could be for one, for your egg to be fertilized, or it could also be to release an egg. But I can't remember which one it does scientifically, though, because there's a bunch of functions with the hoo-ha down there. It's magic. It does everything. But the number one thing, I think it is where it is for fertilization. And if it doesn't, it bleeds and sheds its walls.

And then that's your period, your monthly period. Well, you said a lot of things. I did say a lot of things. What is the primary function of the ovaries? I'm going to say create life. Make child. To become with child. To be one with child.

For the egg to be fertilized. Egg to be fertilized, yes. And if it doesn't, then the walls bleed. Yes, it sheds its uterine walls. Right. Allie, can we accept that as a right answer? No, absolutely not. It is so wrong.

He's saying like words that are right, but he's saying them all out of source. Amber got that right. Amber. He wouldn't know because this is, you're getting the ovaries and the uterus mixed up. Good job, Amber, by the way. Oh, uterus is the one I was thinking of. Yeah, the ovary dispenses the egg. Yeah, it's like a gumball machine for the egg.

I was kind of dancing around it with egg. You were dancing. You said egg. You said the word, the magic word of Vanessa's favorite word. But sadly, that was not the right answer in any possible way. Damn, dude. I was close. All right, we move on.

He got that wrong, which means Amber got it right. And we say hi to, let's go ahead and to Haley now, Riverside, playing with ladies today. And Johnny doesn't know ladies. Good morning, Haley. Hello, good morning. Well, Johnny, know the difference between the Labia Majora and the Labia Menorah. um i'm gonna say yes johnny what is the major difference between the labia majora and the labia minora um one of them is the lips and the other one is like the mound around it

um so the menorah i think is the lips that hang and then the majora i think is the I don't really know how to really describe what the vagina looks like. Do you want to draw a picture? I should, but I don't think we can show it. You can show a picture of a drawing of a vagina. All right, let me see. Here. Okay.

But you've got to describe it. I mean, she says you will know, so this kind of matters. Yeah, so... She's got confidence in your knowledge of the difference between the Majora and the Menorah. Allie, how's the sketch so far? You're drawing a lot of stubble unnecessarily. So look, frame that thing. Why does it have legs?

Allie is turned on right now. So this is the buttocks down here, and then this is the vagina. Yeah. Okay, so right here, the labia minora is going to be the lips on the inside of the vagina. And the minora is going to be the mound right here outside of it. Right. I see what you're doing. Okay, you know what?

She said you wouldn't know. I mean, it's the inner and the outer is really the simple way to put it. That's what I said, yes. The inner and the outer. You did it in a very complex way. I think you got it, though. Very graphic way. I'm going to say Johnny did know that one.

Yeah. And Haley said you would know that one. And so there you go. Haley's on the board. And we say hi to Alyssa now. And it turns out Johnny knows more about the female body than we thought. That picture. Allie keeps staring at my drawing.

Well, that's going to be our next show bumper sticker. Oh, yeah. We're putting that on a T-shirt. Looks like a sideways cheeseburger. I've never been intimate with Jake and then add that. Call the print gurus for that one. All right, Johnny, the next one. Name the lower part of the uterus, the opening that opens into the vagina.

Will Johnny know this? Yes or no, Alyssa? I don't think he will. Johnny, name the lower part of the uterus that opens into the vagina. She says you will not know. I'm going to say vulva. Wow, dead silent. Not the answer, huh?

Alyssa, good job. Johnny did not know. Thank you. Thank you. No problem. Wow. It starts with a C. Any guesses?

Can I say that? I was like, wait, can I say that on the air? Go with a rhyming word. With runt? No. Oh. No? That's the clinical description of the part below the uterus.

I don't know. Yeah, you run. That's why they call the little ones and run. It looks like your runt is fully dilated. We're ready to have this baby. Dilate, cervix. Cervix. Cervix.

That's the one. CeraVe, yeah. All right. CeraVe. Is that what they say in French? CeraVe. All right. One final one, and then that's really it.

Everyone has, by the way, played correctly so far, which is exciting. And someone's going to get to go for that ride down the Fallopian Tube, Lazy River, if they win these tickets. We say hi now to Alex in North Hollywood. Final contestant. Good morning, Alex. Sweet dibs. Shout out, NetBangers. Shout out to the NetBangers watching along on YouTube.

Here we go. Johnny, what exactly is the Mons Pubis? Will Johnny know this, yes or no? I think the phone's breaking up. Say that one more time. I don't think the phone's breaking up. What exactly is the mons pubis? Will Johnny know this, yes or no?

No, I don't even know what that is. I don't think he'll know either. He says, you won't know, Johnny. What is the mons pubis? Back to pen and paper. I'm going back to the drawing because I heard a key word in there. I heard the word pubis, which means pubes, pubic area, pubic region. And then you heard mons.

No, mons. Mons pubis. So I'm going to go with the area above the vagina, right where the mound is, over the pubes. The pubic area right here. Mon pubis is the scientific word for it, right? It's just funny watching people walk down the hall and look back as they hear what's happening in K-Rock. And it was like, whoa. Looks just like mine.

That's mine. It's sketching me. Johnny, the correct answer, it's the fatty area. It's the fatty tissue. The fupa? Yeah, it's kind of the fupa. It's really the non-medical term, yeah. Next to the vagina or, like, under the belly, like where the pooch is at?

I think it is the pooch. It's the fatty tissue over the pubic bone, specifically. Yeah, that's where the pooch is at. That's where Mount's pubis is. Yeah. It's called Mount Pubis? No. Mount Pubis.

Don't say it three times. You don't want to know what happens. All right, Alex, I'm going to say that Johnny got that right enough. So, sadly, of course, the only person who didn't get it correct today is the guy who played. All the women did. Who's going to the Wild Rivers Water Park? Will it be Haley, Alyssa, Amber, Vanessa? All of them predicted correctly in this exciting edition of Johnny Doesn't Know Women.

Congratulations to Amber. Amber, you have done it on line seven. Congrats. You and your labia majora and menorah will be on that, Lacey. All your parts. Great way to end the summer. What a great way to end the summer. Beat the heat.

And thank you for putting up with us. We'll be right back with more show and your tickets to see the Foo Fighters in less than 15 minutes right here on KROQ. K-Rock, Klein Alley Show. We'll get into your ADD news in just a moment. Some guy is still recovering from yesterday's show. Any guesses as to why this man is still laughing from yesterday's show? He does say at the end of this laugh why it is.

But any guesses? Something that happened yesterday. He's still got this guy laughing. So hard to remember 24 hours ago anything that was said. Must have been a different show Couldn't possibly have been He must have been listening to Kukui Or something

Right, right, right It's definitely not us Yeah That just our appearance on the live stream? Oh, you talked to him Aww Pooria Pooria

Really set that guy off Really set that guy off Well, anyway, thank you I'm glad you enjoyed that from yesterday We'll try to set the bar just a little bit higher today, but keep your expectations in check. Let's get to your news now that a brand-new hour of the show will officially begin. Grab your Adderall. It's time for ADD News. We'll start with some good news, bad news in the world of OnlyFans models.

The bad news is that a very popular OnlyFans model, who I'm sure was making plenty on the platform, is now arrested for scamming people. Actually, she's been arrested again. She goes by the name Mia Ventura. She's known for targeting wealthy men, getting them to invite her into their homes, which I'm sure is not difficult. And then she robs them blind. She steals cash, gold, jewelry, anything she can get her hands on. And she did this for two years straight before being arrested for it in March.

But I guess she was released from custody on electronic monitoring. Guess the judge was a guy. And now there's a new theft charge, which means a new arrest for her. So it seems that even though she's been found guilty, she's fine just doing it all over again. And then in the good news category, more women than ever are getting on OnlyFans, including a new addition. An 85-year-old actress named Donna Mills has joined OnlyFans and is sort of leading the new pathway for Golden Girls hotties on OnlyFans. Yeah. So I think that there's going to be a big platform for this as well.

Oh, yeah. There's something for everyone in this world. It's kind of a beautiful thing if you think about it. I mean, also kind of a disgusting thing, but a beautiful thing that someone would be into that. It's going to scratch their itch. She'll make like five bucks. It's not. Yeah, but I mean.

No, she will be super popular. You think so? Yeah, I think there are people who love grannies. Omar does have a song about it. Hey, you guys mocked me for that. I know, I know. It's in the Bet Your Fed intro. You're into weird stuff.

You'll probably be into something like this. You just got to try it. I'm not into weird stuff like that. You're into weird people with their heads cut off. It's not people with their heads cut off. What? Fine. It's not.

Allie is watching. Tell me more. I don't know about this. It's not people. Showvertime. It's from an old Showvertime episode where I explained this thing I attempted to check out. Your kink? Attempted? No, did.

It's anonymous. What did you do? People don't show their heads. That way it's anonymous. You don't know who you're communicating with. You see what I'm saying? It's just bodies. Like on the computer?

Yeah, like chatting. It's like people are chatting. And you're there headless too? Yes. Any more questions or should we move on? It turns out my best feature is being headless. What was the conversation like? Oh, it's flirty, and you chat, and you talk, and then you can escape and go to another room together.

Are you topless? No, I didn't turn my camera on ever because I don't have the confidence to do that. But other people that are much more confident have their cameras on, and then you can see everything. Now, imagine that with a bunch of old people and how much hotter that would be. I am in. With the technology, it's going to be a lot of confusion, I think. It's just going to be a lot of confusion. It's your shoulder, Linda.

A lot of buffering. A lot of buffering. So they say Americans are having less fun than ever. That's why we're challenging each other to have a funner summer by throwing keggers and renting jet skis and getting drunk at water parks. But what is the price of fun in the summer? They broke it down. They did the numbers. And the average person spends $400 per weekend on summer activities.

Does that include like going out to eat? Is that part of it or is it just activities like movies? Socializing, you know, just, yeah, going out to eat, going on trips, yeah, beach, parking, all that kind of stuff. Lake visits, movies. Because we are pushing each other to have more fun, this week alone, I did my part. Went to a mini golf and a batting cage. Two of the funnest things on the planet. They're fun at every age.

And an arcade. See, there you go. Three fun things. That kind of stuff, though, will, like the claw machines, those will drain your bank account quick. You know, what's interesting now is as soon as you get to, like, a claw machine, you have someone standing there watching TikTok videos on how to beat the claw machine, and then they, like, do the trick they watched, and then, boom, they've got a toy. Do you do it? Those really work? Yeah, I watch someone, like, pull out their phone, watch how to beat the claw machine, go through a couple of things, and then they just start taking out toys.

Yeah, there is a trick to it. My aunt was really good at it. It's a crazy skill to have. It really doesn't have a real value in, like, any sort of real-world scenario. The whole thing, even if I grab something, it does the shake. Now, there's a couple of ways, Allie. And then it drops everything. There are certain machines that if you hit a code on the button, the start button, like a push, push, push, hold down, push, it does a reset.

And then it puts it into test mode, and then test mode will actually just pick up a toy and drop it. Cool. I know. It's pretty wild. Man, you don't even need skill for that. No. Oh, I thought it took skill. There are some people that are doing stuff with skill. I was watching someone try to win the toy where you got to cut the string and the toy falls.

That's a new thing now. Yeah, that's a tough one. I was watching someone, they just kept studying a video that says you have to do it in exactly like 3.4 seconds after they, and they were winning toys. Whoa. It's crazy now. Good for the, you know, look, good for the people because they've made it impossible to win these things for years.

Finally, we're getting the power. Yeah, but you know, I think it's teaching kids disappointment. Well, the claw machine is the greatest way of just learning rejection. Like you put this in and you put in the work and nothing happened. Now we just walk away. Historically, that's where my degenerate gambling began was the claw machine. I just need one more. Just one more.

Come on. Just one more, man. Get the octopus! I'm almost there. I guess all the actors and actresses from the 2000s are running out of money because we have yet another reboot being announced. This is right after the announcement that Macaulay Culkin is talking to Disney about a Home Alone reboot.

New details have been revealed on the Clueless sequel series and that Alicia Silverstone is doing the sequel and will reprise her role as Cher. And that will be on Paramount+. It is supposed to begin production in L.A. in 2027. So next year there's going to be a Clueless sequel entire series That's already been ordered. I know that no one cares about our opinion about this stuff,

especially people that work in Hollywood and write these shows. But don't just do the obvious. She's going to have a daughter, and her daughter is now in Clueless. Make her have to go back to school like Billy Madison style. And make her be in the school as a 45-year-old woman, like sitting around and having to do like being the cool girls. Cher goes to fat camp. Let's just make up other movies and mix them up.

Because the obvious move that they all do is, now let's just focus on the family. Well, that's the easiest way to just get the same concept, right? But then if you veer too far from the original concept, people get mad. No, send her back to school as a man. I just don't think I want to see any of these people grown up. Like, I don't want to see Home Alone Kid grown up. I'm not interested in that.

And Cher being like 50, I'm like, okay. You say that now, but you'll be into it. Yeah, you'll be into it. It's nostalgia. Sexually? Yeah, you'll be into it in all possible ways. You'll be into it. Abruptly.

I'll see them all in a chat room with their heads cut off. Just do it with their heads cut off. I don't want to watch that. You can picture them however you want to, Allie. That's true. All right, we get into a brand new hour of the show. In moments, the greatest hour of your life, perhaps.