Klein/Ally Show: The Podcast - HOUR 3- Man vs Machine, The Hall Pass and MORE

Episode Date: July 15, 2026

About to get into a brand new episode of Klein Alley Show, but first let's tell you about our good friends at the finest airport that ever was and ever will be. The San Bernardino International Airport. Especially when there's summer travel plans, it can get expensive at these airports. That's why you got to go to this airport where parking is just five bucks a day. Plus you got those easy trips, San Francisco or Provo, Utah. Maybe you didn't plan anything this summer. See how easy it is. Don't be one of those people who has to pack your patience. Go to San Bernardino International Airport. Okay, enough shilling. Now it's time to get into a brand new episode of Klein Alley Show. This is the world famous K-Rock.

USA! USA! USA! We're not in it. USA! USA! Change that crowd to say Argentina or something. It's K-Rock with Klein Alley Show. Good morning. How the hell goes it? If you need us, phones are open. Actually, no, they're not.

They're not open now, but they will be again in a moment because we've got to go ahead and clear out some of these lines. Everyone wants to go to Disneyland, and I don't blame you. Four tickets will be yours if I pick up your call right now. And then we send you to one of the happiest places on planet Earth. And that is Disneyland. And we say good morning to Caller 20, which puts us in Ontario, California. Is this Marco?

Yes, it is. Marco, you are Caller 20. Awesome. Thank you very much. Congratulations. Sweet divots to you and enjoy your time in Disneyland. Who are you bringing with you? I'm bringing the family.

They finally need a trip out. Do you have just two kids and a significant other, or do you have to leave one of your least favorite kids at home or something? No, it turns out we got two in one, so it's all perfect. Thank you. When you're planning how many kids you're going to make, you should think about if I win a four-pack of tickets to Disneyland. It's always a four-pack, and when you go on rides, a lot of times four is the perfect number. Yeah. My advice to you would be if you go to Disneyland during the summer, don't bitch out and be the poncho people.

It's hot outside. You get wet. There's a lot of great water rides. Just get wet and enjoy yourself. You'll dry up again. Oh, that's the plan. Thank you, Ali. You're very welcome.

Hold on one second. Enjoy those tickets. We'll have more for you coming up at noon today, and then we'll do it again tomorrow until we get every single one of you into Disneyland. Let's make that happen. And this hour on the show, Ali and I both confronted our wives with a conversation about hall passes. They went very differently, I guess.

Yeah, I haven't heard your audio yet. I know how mine went, and have not even... You haven't heard anything this morning? I haven't heard anything since it led to a disagreement last night. Went to bed quiet, silently, and have woken up, and there's been no exchange this morning. So once again, thanks, show, for ruining my personal life. We will get to that coming up this hour on the show. Also, a little man versus machine.

Do humans stand a chance against the robot overlords that are taking over? We are in the middle of a heat wave, so a lot of people turning to AI to save their lives. And we'll figure out if us humans have better ideas than the robots. as to ways to, quote, beat the heat. He'll officially ask AI, how can you beat the heat? Is it even beatable? And we will see if humans or robots reign supreme for another week. That'll all be coming up this hour on the show.

Plus, Evanescence tickets, if you want to go on Saturday to the Kia Forum for that show, we'll make that happen for you. Lots of reasons to keep it locked on KROQ this morning. And then we're here as well. And that will all continue after Incubus on KROQ. Serious question, because there's, I guess, a movie coming out about celebrity hall passes. So people are discussing

this whole concept again. I know it's an old thing and there was a movie years ago. I think it was called Hall Pass. It was a funny movie, I think. And it was the whole idea about can a marriage stand up or survive the whole concept of,

yeah, what the hell? You're going to Vegas. You can have a hall pass. And then there's the celebrity hall pass concept, which is even more preposterous because the reality is most people in the world

are never going to encounter or be anywhere near these quote celebrities. We live in a place where maybe that's a possibility i mean it is possible if you think about if you lived in southern california for any amount of time maybe at some point you did encounter a famous person somewhere and then you're like if they happen to be oh my god what are the odds i ran into mario lopez that's my celebrity hall pass he's also in the clearance section at target hey mario lopez you're my hall

pass so the question really is if that is a real thing and if you've agreed to that or if that can even happen who is the hall pass is it a specific person or a genre oh genre that's a thing you can do what does that mean genre you can do a genre a genre pass female no that's my hall pass the genre of ladies i have the genre i thought you agreed to this lady pass or like the cast of oh you could take a show pat show pat show oh if i run into anyone from there because the Or anyone I had a crush on growing up, like any celebrities that I had a celebrity crush on. Well, you probably couldn't have gotten them when they were in their heyday, but now it's been a while. But now Jonathan Taylor Thomas, I think, just hangs out at a bar in Silver Lake.

I could probably knock that out. Right. Yeah, that girl from Small Wonder is probably like 60 now. I'll probably have my way with her. You'll probably hit it. Yeah. So some of these are not that out of reach. That's the thing, though, is that if you finally got to the point where it was possible,

because I had a one-time encounter with Pam Anderson. And it was more of a modern day Pam Anderson as opposed to a, you know, more of a mayday than a heyday, you know? The modern day no eyebrows one? Not that modern day, but less. Before she started not wearing makeup? Not prime Pam Anderson. But I felt like, man, that would have been such a, you know, bucket list thing. Not that it would have ever happened.

But then I thought to myself, but it's not nearly as. When you say encounter, do you mean you were just in the same room with her? Or was there a possibility? It was just the two of us together somewhere. Doing what? Waiting for our cars at the ballet. Did you say anything? I did.

We had a nice chat. What did you say? I'm not going to go into what I said. I don't remember what I said. Did you make a car joke? No. You totally did. I said, are you going to get in it or just roll around on the front of it and pose?

I didn't say that. I thought about saying that. Did a nice car pull up and you're like, that's me. Just kidding. No, I didn't. Luckily, her car pulled up first. I didn't have to get into that. And she tried to back it over me on the way out.

But the real question is, has it happened? Maybe you have an agreement with your boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, wife, whatever. What is the agreement? That's question one. Question two is, has it ever played out? Has anyone ever, I was curious, in a real life scenario, because we've talked to a lot of people, You can be anonymous if you need to be. You're not going to out-freak the person we talked to yesterday about the gummy worms, so don't worry.

You're playing for second place on this one. But has it ever happened, and what was the fallout of it? Was the fallout good, bad? Is the whole idea of the hall pass situation that you don't have to ever speak of it? So it's kind of like this was agreed to ahead of time. They probably agreed to it because they never thought it would happen, but now I'm going to make it happen. A lot of questions. And then Allie and I both confronted our wives yesterday with some damning audio where we discussed the concept.

And we'll play that for you after we get back from this quick break. And we'll hear your stories next at 800-520-1067. This is a cautionary tale. I'm reading some of the texts coming through and people on the phones at 800-520-1067 as we discuss this concept of the hall pass, which is nothing new. But it's coming back now because I guess there's some movie that's coming out called so-and-so something celebrity hall pass. But anyway. It's called so-and-so something celebrity hall pass. I don't know.

We're not promoting the movie. I don't even know what it's called, but there's been a lot of conversation. Tell you to interview them on the golf course. I don't care. 657 says, I got a hall pass from my wife to go out with the boys and drink as much as I want. Only if I got with any girls, she would find out, and she said she would burn all my stuff, so I was scared, and I didn't even drink that night. So that's, once again, not a real hall pass, but someone claims that they did have a friend that had a celebrity hall pass with the rapper Genuine. Oh, wow.

The singer, Genuine. I feel like that could happen. He came to a club one day to perform, and they ended up sleeping together. And then she was all excited to tell her man that it happened, and when he found out, he divorced her. Oh, damn. And she's going, whoa, whoa, whoa. I thought this was, he was the good, he was the- Oh, you can plead that in court.

Hall pass. He was the approved Genuine. You said I could sleep with Genuine. I love that she was excited to tell him. I can't wait to tell him I slept with Genuine. I cheated on you with Genuine. But I guess that's, once again, not cheating because that was a conversation that was had. And we're learning the pros and the cons of the hall pass.

In a moment, you're going to hear Allie and I have a very difficult conversation with our wives. Hi, Josh on KROQ. Good morning. Hey, how's it going, Klein? What can we do for you? So, my kitchen pass, because I'm so old, that's what it was called back in the day, not the hall pass. My kitchen pass is Chloe Savigny. and like 2015

I was driving for Uber and I told my girlfriend at the time I was so out of my mind that I thought I was going to go to LA and give rights to all the stars and I was going to remake this scene from this movie Kids and pick up Chloe Sevigny

Isn't it the movie where everyone got AIDS? Yes it is. You want to recreate the movie where everyone got AIDS? Hey it's me Casper. I was going to recreate the scene where she got into the cab after she finds out that she got AIDS. But what ends what happens. What a weird fantasy scene to recreate.

And this is all in your kitchen pass? You told this to her? Yeah. How else are you going to introduce Chloe Sweeney to your girlfriend at the time? Well, I kid you not. My first night driving Uber, this is what I told, you know,

my girlfriend before I went out there. I kid you not. I picked up Chloe Sweeney. Did she tell you that she had AIDS? I was trying to play it cool, but she was with her boyfriend at the time. Ah, I really ruined your plan. Yeah. That is interesting, though, that you have, even just to encounter the person that you have the hall pass with.

I mean, there's no chance anyone's ever gone up to a celebrity and said, I'm sure it actually probably does happen. You're my hall pass. They probably hear that. Probably happens to some comedian, and they're like, I'll sleep with you. Right. Like, that's the thing. uh i mean if anyone ever said to me you're my hope i guess it's got to work for both parties because the the hall pass has to go all right i mean the odds of it all lining up and working out

are so right the other person has to either be single or they have to have you as a hall pass so ali i don't know how your conversation went with your wife well in my scenario we didn't really have an issue because we do think that it's so unrealistic that it's easy to say it's totally fine if there were a couple celebrities or people that we had hall passes for who would they be for you we already know isn't just taylor swift i don't know garbage i know it really smells sorry we were having an issue with our garbage was conversation you're having a conversation by a stanky garbage can i had whenever you think things are going to get less i know it's unbelievable such a letdown every single time every single time i get so excited i try

I'm available to add. I try to forget what Allie looks like. And I'm like, here we go now. It's getting somewhere. Oh, man, the garbage can really stinks. I know. It really smells. There.

OK, so when Jack. Now she's changing the garbage as we. Oh, God. That house is gross. Just gross. And it has three caps. There. OK, so when Jack, this whole thing with Jackie Antonoff and Margaret Folley,

it's like all those whatever's going around. I was like, maybe I can have an affair with Jackie Antonoff. Oh. So you'd go with a guy. Oh, there's just so... I don't know. I'd be a little curious. If you got Jack, could I have Margaret?

Sure. Well, if I had a list, would you be opposed to checking off the list? Celebrities are on limits. On limits? Off. Yeah. Wait. They're not off limits.

They're on. Jedi mind trick. Whoa. Once again, what she is doing is genius because I don't know what the rule is, but she's obviously said something. Right. Celebrities are on limits, not off off limits. Exactly.

Anyone's game is what she's saying. Until you did it. In which case she's like, I said they're not on limits. Right. And you're like, what? I don't know about the limits. Do you have AIDS? What is happening here?

So I can have sex with any celebrity? If I can. Any celebrity is fine? Yeah. Why wouldn't it be fine? What? That's crazy. Any celebrity.

That means like, what is a celebrity? Someone who was on The Bachelor? They're walking around the streets. Thank you. This is why I asked. what level of celebrity like i mean like d no it has to be like a b a b celebrities any a or b lister yeah and man or woman yeah right no i like that do you have someone in mind i mean really it's just any a lister right i mean anybody that was an a lister that i could sleep with you'd

Would you rather have sex with an ugly A-lister than a super attractive D-lister? I don't, yeah, probably. Really? I mean, who's an unattractive A-lister? Like Al Pacino? Yeah, there's some old A-listers out there. Yeah, there's a ton. Steve Buscemi's a great unattractive A-lister.

I'd probably have sex with him. Just because you know the story? Why would they be off limits? So what if it's people we know? I don't want you cheating on me. Yeah, but if there's a hall pass. Why is there a hall pass? It's like someone you've always wanted to sleep with.

Like, is there someone in your past that you've always wanted to sleep with? No, I slept with everybody. Oh, my God. Jesus, for the win, huh? Glad to be sloppy 500s. If you have the opportunity to sleep with Taylor Swift, then you should take it. Well, yeah. Forget about me.

I know. And I will forget about you. With who? Anybody. So there it is. There's the end of it. So she's got one very unattainable, massive A-lister on her list, and you can have anyone who's, quote,

classified as a celebrity on the A or B list? Yeah. That opens up a lot. Pretty good conversation. For you, yeah. But it seems like people we know are off-limits. But you don't know any celebrities. No, but I don't think a hall pass has to just be a celebrity.

Why don't you tell Vanessa just to start booking people on our show that are A's or B-listers you want to have sex with, because then you'll have a chance to meet them. because that's the whole thing too. Book Steve Buscemi for next week, Vanessa. He's got some new project coming out, I'm sure. He's going to be in that weird, stupid Hall Pass movie. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Let's get in here. So how did your conversation go? Not good. This is how it started. Did you figure out all that? Would you ever let me have sex with Sidney Sweeney if I met her? You're recording me.

So let's avoid this. You're recording me, so what's the point of this? She's game for anything. I was asking you about that. That you're recording. Do you believe in hall passes? Yes, for me. Oh.

Who would you want? Sidney Sweeney? No. You can have Sidney Sweeney. I've now given her the hall pass of Sidney Sweeney. Yeah, but she doesn't want that. Why wouldn't you let her tell you what she wants? I don't want Sidney Sweeney.

Right. let's make that a fair deal we can both have Sydney Sweeney I don't know what's the point of this bit that you're doing

she's not a fan are you just out of curiosity when they immediately say you're recording are you holding up a phone to her face no

how obvious are you try to be discreet man I'm trying to be discreet the phone is on you feel like a mic flag on her face in bed or what do you have one of these

on air lights in the room that turns on I mean she's You can't be incognito in any way. I said, I had her come on, meet me at the podium, and that's where this conversation happened. You had to do that collapsing? Yeah, I had to wait until I was...

Back to one? I had my phone resting on my chest. I thought it was incognito, and we're sitting there watching TV, and I said, great, I'll just mention casually this conversation. What's the point of this bit that you're doing? It's not a bit we're doing. We're having a conversation.

What's the topic Based on hall passes That's not even who you'd want A hall pass to be So she says that's not who I would want My hall pass to be She thinks she knows It's not who I would want

Me Who would you want You would want me That's not a hall pass It's a hall way he would want you to be her hall no she she thinks i would want her to be my hall pass and i said that's not a hall pass that's a whole way that's just you having sex with your wife right that's no pass it's not a joke right so wait so what do does she think that you would prefer like

emily rajaskowski or something oh it's a good one i should have mentioned her i know when they ask like who you're like oh my god who wouldn't it be right right but you know the and the odds once again, I think that the odds, everyone just plays the fact that it'll never happen, so it's one of those quote, harmless fantasies. Totally. And we're just trying to figure out if it's ever happened. Well, the same way that you masturbated to me, why would you masturbate to me?

She thinks that you think of her when you masturbate? Yeah, because one time she caught me, and she said, what are you looking at? And I said, you, your Instagram. What? You clearly were not, right? No, I wasn't. Yeah. It was a different person. Who is thinking about their

own significant other when they're pleasuring themselves. That's your chance to think about anything but that person. Right, exactly. And, uh, but I... We'll get recorded and I didn't tell her that. All right. And, honey, I have a question. Meet me back in the recording studio

for some more hidden audio. So, anyway, uh, Hall Pass is looking sharp in our future. Wow, a lot of, uh, warnings of, uh, things that went backwards on the, uh, text line. It's K-Rap. We are finally showing Man Vs. Machine next. Consider this a warning. It is gonna get super We're hot in all parts of Southern California today.

Temperatures in triple digits. I believe a little bit after the show today, Jake will be roaming the streets with Moist Joyce, doing some pit stops to make sure people have the right amount of deodorant on on a day like today. It's a PSA, a little B-O-P-S-A, so to make sure that you're not stanking up all of SoCal because you're not dressed appropriately and you're not wearing the right amount. Sometimes you've got a double layer, triple layer of a deodorant. Sometimes people even bring it with you. I think Jake's going to be handing out sticks of deodorant today to people that stank.

I think that's a good next level thing to do, help people. And then I think if the people, do we have the stickers ready to go? I believe anyone who's been pit approved gets to wear a sticker all day, like a smog check sticker that says that their BOs were checked and approved. Pass the test. So that's exciting. That'll be happening through the streets later today. So be on the lookout for that. And a reminder, if you're getting ready for the day, put on enough deodorant.

But meanwhile, a lot of people are turning to AI to help them beat the heat. and we will get into a round of man versus machine in a moment to see if us humans stand a chance against the robot overlords when it comes to all things Heat Wave. Here we go. Questions that were asked to the AI overlords that will eventually rule us all and then we as humans will try to see if we even stand a chance anymore

with just regular human intelligence. First question is for DJ Omar Khan, who is a human, last I checked, although he does seem to be the most, usually he's like step for step with the robot in most of his answers. So the question is, a lot of people are saying, how to beat the heat, beat the heat, got to beat the heat. We asked AI, what is the best way, what is one way that you could quote and should beat the heat? And what do you think as a human is the most important way to beat the heat, Omar? Well, the best way is going to be to visit your local Costco, because not only are you going to get free snacks, free samples,

But they have that excellent freezer where they keep all the, you know, like eggs and strawberries and all that. You just cruise around there and then, yeah. And you cruise, go to the Costco because you can eat. Yeah, you can eat and then go into the little freezer section, you know, where they keep the eggs. And then just chill out there. And then you can go get some more snacks and then go back and cruise around. And you can stay cool for a very long time inside the Costco. All right.

Omar says go to Costco. That's the best way to beat the heat. If you're not a member, I don't know how you're going to figure that out. You go in and say you're going to have a prescription filled. Oh, is that what you said? Or you can buy alcohol there for you don't have a membership. And then you just go hang out in the freezer? Yeah.

Cool. No, that won't raise any alarms. Nothing sad about that. When is he going to pick up his prescription? I'm lost. He's just sitting on the cucumber. So good. All right, here's what the robot said.

What's the best way to beat the heat? If you're trying to stay cool during a hot day, the most effective strategy are to keep your core body temperature down and stay hydrated so drink plenty of water throughout the day. If you're sweating heavily, include an electrolyte drink or eat foods rich in potassium and sodium. Well, the robot says it has nothing to do with location. It has to do with what you're putting in your body to keep your core temperature down. That is the only way to, quote, actually beat the heat. So I like Omar's answer better for so many reasons. Even drinking water, I feel like, does nothing when you're this hot.

Then you're going to just pee all day. Yeah. I think point human on that one, so good job, Omar. Thank you. Forget about that lame-ass robot with his electrolyte potassium jibber-jabber. Ali, next question. Omar mentioned going to Costco, but we did ask AI, where is the best place if you want free AC? You don't want to pay for air conditioning.

It feels great, but it sucks when you're paying for it at your place. So where, according to the AI technology, should you go if you are looking for basking in the glory of free AC? Yeah, I mean, I hesitate to say Costco again, but you're right. You do have to have a membership, so you do have to pay for that. If it was just today, museums are free on Wednesdays, and they have great AC and a lot of space. Museums are free on Wednesdays? Yeah. Is that like a known thing?

Well, maybe. Did you make that up, or is that a real thing? I think it's true. You really are El Chico. Every Wednesday? I think so. Like LACMA and MOCA and all those? Every museum is free.

LACMA, MOCA, Frappe, all of them. All on Wednesdays. All the museums? I'm pretty sure. No, LACMA is not free on Wednesdays. All right. It's probably free on Wednesdays. Jake just said it's not.

You don't know what you're talking about. Museums are free on Wednesdays. What about that one? Because with a valid ID, you can visit weekdays after 3 p.m. No, that's not true, guys. Allie, where did you come up with this? I feel like I see it all the time. You see it all the time where?

Like signs outside the museum. This is what the robot says. If you're just looking to cool off without spending much, go to a public library. Quiet, comfortable, free Wi-Fi, restrooms, and reliable air conditioning. Plus, you can meet a bum showering in the water fountain. win-win. See, that's why I didn't say library, because the library itself is musty. It smells like books.

And, you know, the Wi-Fi, yeah, but it's old, and then you've got to have, anytime you go in the bathroom, it's gross in there. Yeah, but clearly the robot gets the point, because what you said doesn't even make sense. The museums are free on Wednesdays! The museums have a similar smell to the library anyway. I know, but it smells, but there's bigger spaces, and there's not a lot of

people in there, so you have a lot of ventilation, and you can walk around in there for hours, and no one would ask any questions. A ton of people rushing there now for the, quote, free museum day that Allie mentioned. It is free. The final question goes to Jake. I believe Robot gets a point on that one. Human's got a point. So, Jake, this comes down to you, man. The future of humanity

comes down to this. Everyone likes to talk about how it's so hot you can cook an egg in the street, and today's one of those days that I think you could cook an egg in the street, but other than the boring... Eggs! Other than... Other than... There you go.

Other than... other than the boring eggs but it's something else that you could cook in the street and it would be delicious we asked the AI technology but you get to go first easy grilled mustard sandwich you can almost taste the street

so you're saying take your recipe for mustard sandwich and make it a grilled mustard sandwich or any grilled sandwich like you just put it on the street is that how you do it Yeah, you could use like a flattener and make it like a panini. Yeah, yeah.

All right. This is what the robot said. Cookie dough bakes into a soft cookie over several hours. Street cookies for the win. Yeah, I think you're right. I think the robot got that one. Damn it. Damn it, Jake.

Mustard sandwich. Let us down again. There's a lot of museums that are free on Wednesdays. Name one. The Autry Museum. The Autry Museum. The Natural History Museum of L.A. County. The Plaza Cultura de Artes.

I'm just looking it up. There's a lot. Okay. Just saying. Jake will be posting his recipe for the street mustard sandwich on our Instagram if you're interested in making that today. The less stupid thing. Autry Museum is not free. It's the first Wednesday.

Okay, shut up. They're free on Wednesday. Go take a break. If you show up today, you're going to get in. We have news next and then your Evanescence tickets coming up on Tuesday. Hey, Rock. We are Klein Alley Show. We'll get into some ADD news in just a moment,

and then we'll make it all worth your while throughout the morning with a variety of gifts, a cavalcade of presents and bribery. But first, Alley, go ahead and accept this. Do you think this will be a compliment or a complaint about the show? Oh, gosh. It's a real toss-up. I would say let's go with compliments. All right.

It is definitely the odds-on not favorite, but Alley says this could be a compliment. Let's find out together. Hey, good morning, guys. Just wanted to give you a quick shout-out, say thank you guys so much for the laughs. I've actually kind of been going through some tough times lately, going into

my first couple therapy session with my spouse this week. Welcome to our world. Yeah, that happens on a regular basis over here. It's a slippery slope. We may possibly be heading for a divorce soon, but just wanted to let you guys know that you guys really have been giving so

many laughs towards, not just me, but I'm sure so many people. So just thank you guys, all y'all on the show. You guys really know how to you know, make somebody's day, if they're not having a good day, you guys know how to make their day right. So sweet dips. Keep doing what you're doing. Love y'all

so much. If your life is currently falling apart, then we do seem like a better option than what you are dealing with. And we're happy to be that other option. I can't believe I was right. It was a compliment. I'm still waiting for him to pivot and give us an insult. Oh, I stopped the message. 20 seconds short. But I think he goes on to say

Jake's annoying. Oh, well. Anyway, let's get into this, your news, and then a brand new hour of the show can officially begin. Grab your Adderall. It's time for ADD News. One of the coolest people to ever live is Sully Sullenberger. You don't need to do anything the rest of your life because you're the guy that landed a plane on the Hudson River.

And I think he did so drunk, did he not? No, you're getting confused with that movie. What are you talking about? Oh, that was the upside down guy. Allie gets so confused. Oh, my God. Allie, I'm telling you right now, guys, I know that she's about to say that Sully has dementia or whatever,

but I think Allie's got it first. No, I just get mixed up. And she is confusing the Denzel Washington movie with what happened in real life. But that also happened in real life, right? No, that was a movie. I know it was a movie, but wasn't it based on a true story? I don't think so. About a pilot that got drunk and landed a plane upside down?

I think so. I don't know about it. Allie is out of her mind. Apparently, Sully Sullenberger is as well, because he just shared that he has been... It must be contagious, and you caught it. with Alzheimer's disease. He's 75 years old. Alzheimer's, not dementia.

I don't know the difference. You got mixed up. What's the difference between Alzheimer's and dementia? Dementia is basically where you kind of forget where you are. You're confused about your surroundings. Alzheimer's is more forgetting who you are, like stories about your life, people that you, you know, your family members.

They are similar, but Alzheimer's is more memory related. one's worse? Look if you had to pick which one you don't want. I've heard dementia is worse. It's the worst one. Just because it affects more things. Sometimes you forget how to take care of yourself. Yeah. Now going to the bathroom and stuff, you just forget. You just don't know how. Yeah, you just kind of forget everything

and Alzheimer's is more like specific memories of your life, the people you know. Like I would look at you and call you maybe my son one day because I would get you mixed up with other men in my life. It's like that men in black thing where they zap your memory. Yeah, basically.

And then sometimes it comes back. Was that based on a real movie? That was a real movie with Denzel Washington. No, it's not. Will Smith, you racist. So he said for now, this means so he's in the early stages and he said this means a name might come easily to me, might not come easily to me. I might forget a story I recently told or I don't sleep as well. Basically, things that happen to everybody.

But he said he's still at the beginning of this long journey. And I just think when it does get bad, there needs to be somebody telling him every day what he did. This is what you did. Like memento, like tattoo it on your chest and say, like, this is what happened. It's cool when you're a guy like that that did something that's so well-known and heroic because no one else is going to forget it. So they'll just constantly be like, hey, you're the man. And I'll be like, why is everyone saying I'm the man today? Which is much better than being a person that is a total asshole that has dementia.

And everyone's like, I hate you. Why does everyone hate me? Or if you get it, I can always tell you every day, like, you landed a plane on the Hudson upside down drunk. I'm going to make the same announcement that he made because now you guys won't give me such a hard time. I don't remember co-workers' names that work here. You guys made me feel like I'm a total ass because I can't remember. He has early onset Alzheimer's. Yeah, I got it, too.

He's in the early stages. Which one of us wouldn't like to publicly announce that just so that we don't feel bad every time we run into someone out in the public? By the way, it might have a touch of Alzheimer's. We all probably got it. We're getting it. We got it. There are plenty of license plates that are banned every year for being too sexually explicit or inappropriate or suggestive. And rarely does the DMV issue their own inappropriate license plates.

But this did just happen to a senior citizen, and she didn't even have to pay extra for it. This is a pretty great story because it was all natural, and she does want to get rid of it, though I don't think she should. When Nancy D'Alistretto went to collect her mail, she got quite the surprise, a new license plate with her vehicle registration renewal. And I looked at it, and I said, I don't think so. The plate reads SQZA55, but from a distance, those five fives can be read as S's. Well, you get the picture. Now, hold on, let me do some math here. I gotta solve this. Is it squeeze ass? It's squeeze ass.

Squeeze ass? Oh, man, that's not good. He's blank. Awesome. Okay. I don't think a woman that lives in a senior community that's going to be 77 years old next month will be driving around with what this plate has to say. The plates become the talk around her retirement community, especially the men. Watch out, street ass.

Get over here, sweet James. It's going to be great. She can't send it back, right? No, you got to keep it. You got to keep it. It's the greatest license plate since Ass Man on Seinfeld. And this is the DMV issuing it. I know.

How great is that? Had you requested that, like when Jake got his okay list, they would have rejected it. Because they reject anything that even looks a little bit offensive. Yeah, exactly. Squeeze ass. That's awesome. Are they still made by prisoners, license plates? Yeah.

That's not happening. That's a prisoner with a funny sense of humor. Wait, so they don't make it up, though. They just give them the letters and numbers, right? I think they get to make them up. They don't just make it up. Yeah, they do. I'm going to do a squeeze-ass, and I'll give it to this woman in a senior's dress.

Let me tell you something. You know how I said you always got to have a prison skill on the ready in case you get locked up? Funny license plates. That would be mine. I would be that guy. Come over here. I got a bunch of funny ways. We can't shank that guy.

He's the squeeze-ass guy. That's okay. Give him a squeeze-ass. The World Cup has affected our wallets. It's affected our productivity, but how has it affected our dating lives? Apparently, a lot. Not only do they predict a World Cup baby boom nine months from now, but also it's because of all the international hookups it's also happening during those three minute hydration

breaks that is the main motivator for people they have noticed that the tinder and hinge activity during those three minute hydration breaks skyrockets as much as 55 so yes it's good for the players to get a little juice but it's also nice for people who have three minutes to just take a little swipey swipe and apparently that's causing more hookups yeah and imagine uh now that Spain has made it to the finals. I mean, there's going to be a lot of them Spanish babies running around. The French ones, not so much. I feel like that didn't

go so well yesterday, and a lot of people I know, especially people that were rooting hard, are very depressed right now. Seeing French people sad and crying really hit me more than I'd... Like, there was a little French girl crying, and I was like, oh, it's like Les Mis. Yeah, there's something about it. I don't know why. There's other countries...

Exactly. Oh, well, we move on, and we'll forget about this whole thing in a couple of days anyway, right? Oh, yeah, we won't care. Get into a brand new hour of the show. We do it next. It's the Klein Alley Show. Good morning.