Klein/Ally Show: The Podcast - HOUR 3- Surfers on the News, Johnny's bet and MORE

Episode Date: September 9, 2026

We'll get into an episode of Klein Alley Show in just a moment, but in the meantime, let's tell you about our absolute favorite place on the planet. Yep, that would be San Bernardino International Airport, where you can go through the airport process without waiting in long lines and overpaying for parking. Quick connections to the Bay Area and the world, plus ski and snowboard in Provo from San Bernardino all winter long. Every other airport, you're going to be in long TSA lines, you're going to be miserable, you're going to say, oh, I got to get there two, three hours before my flight.

Not at San Bernardino International Airport. And now we send you on a direct flight into our podcast, which starts right now. This is the world famous KROQ. Ah, yes. Good morning. Welcome to your KROQ. We are Klein Alley Show. It is Wednesday, and we have access for you to go to opening night, Not Scary Farm.

Get those first screams before everyone else gets to go. You get to go through first. Get that new blood smell. Nothing like it around the Halloween time. And I'm looking for you right now. If you are the 20th caller, the number is 800-520-1067. If you're just joining us, happy first day of NFL action this season. There's no bigger Arizona Cardinals fan on the planet than that woman right there.

Woo, go Cards. What do they say? That's right. That's Ali. Omar's going to be rocking them Washington Commanders. How now, Brown Cow? Oh, damn. Oh, boy.

We can't say all that. What a team for Omar to draft. Throwback. How now? Jay. Jay. How now? Makes no sense.

Jay. Oh, let me think of some of my fans. Jake's a Packers fan this year. Johnny will be rocking the Denver Broncos. Vanessa's with the Los Angeles Rams. And everyone wanted that team, and she drafted it. She was upset about it. She was mad about it.

I'll be with the Baltimore Ravens. Woo! Of course, fandom. And by the way, we got a lot of texts from people that support all these teams saying, Oh, I'm so excited that Jake will be rooting for the Packers. No one, no Ravens fans reached out to say they were excited that I'd be jumping with them. There ain't no Cardinals fans texting in either. Anyway, we're here for you, and we will be here for you all season long.

Very excited about that. We've got to say good morning right now to the listener in Whittier. Hey, who's this? Hello? Hi, who are you? Hi, this is Lourdes from Whittier. I was calling for the Not Scary Farm ticket. Yes, you are the 20th caller, Lourdes from Whittier.

Oh, my God. Thank you so much. You're very welcome. Four tickets will be yours, so enjoy yourself a good time at Not Scary Farm opening night, all right? Awesome. Thank you so much. Thank you for starting your day with us here on KROQ. Allie, I know we have some things planned this hour.

Do we? I think so. Will we get to those things? That's a good question. Let me see. Let me check the whole schedule here. I know we're off schedule, as usual. Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Okay. I think we can do some of these things. Check, check, check. Throw that out. Mm-hmm. Why was that in there?

We will get to that and maybe this after Tame Impala. Don't ask for autographs anymore. He's done signing them. It's K-Rock. That's good news for you, Allie. Someone just pointed out that your Cardinals will be here for opening weekend, playing the Chargers right here in Los Angeles. So you can go to that game.

It's supposed to be out of town, but I guess I've got to cancel it. You've got a big fan of the team now. You've got to go support your team. It's all about supporting the team. Would you please check out the latest picture, Allie, that was posted on our Instagram, McLeanAllieShow. Uh-oh. I want you to get a sense of...

Is this of me looking fat? how did you know is it just take a look okay take a look and see what you think all right let's see ali is uh this is from yesterday or today i'm not gonna say what day it's from but uh take a peek on our story it's on the story client ali show instagram oh wow that's previous fat me oh is that what you're talking about or a different i think there's a new one oh that's a different fat one yeah that's That's a throwback fat. Oh, yeah.

I love throwback fat. Yeah, we're doing some throwback fat. Throwback fat. Right. This is when Allie had more back fat. And so she's pregnant again. If you're just joining us, you're new to the show. I want to find out when I start reaching my before pictures.

Oh, when you get to as big as you used to be? Mm-hmm. Man, we'll place our bets on that. I am definitely, especially next to Hayley Williams. Yeah. I mean, I look probably two to three times larger. Right. She's tiny.

Yeah, someone's going to have to go in and save her. So, anyway, that's on the Instagram now. You can go there and check out stuff, including yesterday's high-voltage food review. What is this sweater? Me getting shocked while Allie got to enjoy some sort of Cinnabon covered with Cheez-Its. Anyway, that video is all up on Instagram, client on the show. Yeah, you know what's interesting is we had some extra of that Cheez-It Cinnabon thing, and all of them just sat there untouched in this break room, which I can't believe.

That's crazy. People eat everything here. You can put down, like, 12 chicken wings, all bones, with just one half a wing left, and someone will walk by and eat it here. Pick at it. But they're like Omar's football team, the Native Americans. No piece wasted. Every bit gets eaten around here.

They don't waste anything. You love that he picked the Coyotes. I don't love it. I think it's going to get our whole show canceled, to be completely honest. But for the time being, I think it's funny that Omar ended up as a huge fan. Stop drinking that fire water. Oh, no. You know, we've learned one thing, and that is that surfers are the place you must go if you're doing a news story.

And we love the SoCal surfing community. It is in the DNA of KROQ for sure. But I think it's even better when the media needs to turn to the surfers And this happened during the high surf we were getting over the weekend But as we've learned now, every time the news goes to surfers, it's better news And they should always go to surfers for, really, any story they need regular person feedback on Oh yeah, shootings, everything It doesn't matter what the situation is, go to the surfers

They only go there usually when there's stuff about the ocean Well, they love going to them and being like, wow, I can't believe you're out here Yeah When the weather's so bad, when the surf is so high, when it's potentially dangerous, and they're always like, yeah, bro, I'll be out here, man. So this was recently from the big waves we were getting this past weekend. Oh, bro, it's just like, dude, you got the best barrels ever, dude. Just like you pull in and you just get spit right out of them.

And you just drop in and just smack the lip. Whoop-ah! Drop down. Snap. Ah! And then after that, you just drop in, you just ride the barrel and get pitted. So pitted, like that. Now, they asked him what he thought of the weather, and that was the answer, which is the best part about it.

And we've learned now. He was asked about the fires. Yeah, that wasn't even about the waves at all. But the surfers are all, and they always give that. If you remember, Allie, there was the surfer that they chatted with after there was the poop in the ocean situation. Oh, that's right. The sewage water, yes. And they're still out there surfing.

Even just the interviews with, this was a hero surfer that got chatted with. I mean, this is like where any time you. Back to the show. Take a look at this, folks. Incredible vision of surfers on the Gold Coast risking their lives to save a pair of tourists who were in very much a great deal of danger. In they went, didn't even think about it. Yeah, the lifesavers had actually just closed down the beach

and these two guys came to the rescue. Amazing vision. Now joining us now from Kira Beach are two of those surfers, Nick Chalmers and Angus McNichol. Good morning to you boys. Good morning. How you doing? that is a very impressive effort nick you you first spotted the woman in trouble in the surf take us through what happened

yeah we were just watching the waves and uh these guys are so chill that's the best part they're nothing phases them yeah the woman just got sucked out near the groin and then she looked in trouble and i sent angus out there on his board and the next thing we know the guy was out there as well, so let's get out there. You must have thought, first of all, what idiots for getting themselves into that situation. Oh, it was pretty crazy. Like, the conditions definitely weren't for swimming, and I don't know, they just got caught off guard, and...

That's why surfers, once again, it doesn't matter what... That's Nick Chum. It doesn't matter which country you're in, it always means... They always sound the same. You always have to go to the surfers. They're so happy and so chill. They're just happy with the simplest things. And they don't seem once again affected by anything.

It's all vibes. Yeah, even if something devastating is happening, theoretically, they can find a silver lining. Or they can just find a wave to ride and move on with their life. When the guy that we just heard from a moment ago, they asked him to clarify his statements earlier. Because, once again, this guy technically, as we'll point out, was a boogie boarder, not a surfer. Which is even funnier. Surfers maybe would have a problem with that. but listen to when the news asked him to clarify his original statement i grabbed ethan real quick

i'm going to bring you into the shot you are here with your boogie board you got your helmet tell me a little bit about what the conditions have been like for you so far it's been the best conditions ever dude you could just drop straight into them get real pitted come out of them hit the lip and just go okay now for someone who doesn't surf break that down for for us so she's saying, can you not speak in surf talk for a moment for the regular person watching? For someone who doesn't surf, like you. Right.

You're just, like, riding down the wave, and then you get into the little curly thing, and then you come out of it, and then you hit the lapel pie. Well, that's the most important part. It's not even a whole heart. Curly thing, and then you come out of it, and then you hit the lapel pie.

Kapow. Yeah, just... Okay, okay. You have a helmet on. You always... That may be a 24-7 thing. You have a helmet on, you stalked her orders. Boogie board with the helmet or because of you?

Okay. Precautions. Got to be safe out there. So once again, I think that we should now only report on news stories where surfers are in. Well, pause it. It's not like Omar should say for the commanders. That's right. It's one of Omar's war chants.

His war chant. Hey, Matt on KROQ. Yes, you're on. What's up? What's up? So one time I went on a bachelor party to Z. guatanejo and the surfers are just jerks they are not the nicest people in the world well i know surfers here's why because real surfers don't like when riffraff kind of tried to ride their

waves there's a documentary called point break about this this exact thing i understand right and uh this is their their waves that's not your wave johnny yeah you can't take people's waves and then you there's a certain etiquette with waiting in line this is why i've never even dared to do this because I don't want to infiltrate the community that's already been established. Let's go ask Surfer Jay. Surfer Jay walks around here barefoot all day. He goes out every morning.

It's four in the morning surfing. Then he comes in here. I think he's more of an inclusive guy, though. Most surfers are locals only. They're locals only guys. He seems like someone who would help a beginner. Totally, 100%. Those are the guys that the news is talking to.

I don't think the mean surfers would even agree to be on the news because they don't talk about it. Right, exactly. This is our thing. Yeah. Also, there was that movie with the one-armed surfer girl. That's another one, Allie, about surfers. Okay, we're just naming surfing movies?

Surf Sub, the surfing penguin movie. Right. They were welcoming that one as well. There's Blue Crush. Blue Crush. Another great surfing movie. Those guys were dicks, those surfers. Not the girls.

The girls? The girls were cool. The guys in Hawaii were dicks about protecting their surf. They were not WAPA. They were not WAPA. So, from now on, I recommend all news agencies immediately only interview surfers for your stories. We've got to take a quick break. We're back in a second.

When we return, oh, man. Someone on the show got unexpected money. And when you get unexpected money, it is the greatest money you can get. And we should determine what happens with that money. We will figure out together, with your help, how this person will be forced to spend their money after this quick break on K-Rock. Some people say $10 is $10 is $10, the thousands, the thousands, the thousands. But it's different. money hits different and when it's unexpected money you were not expecting it it happened and

i'm not talking about reaching into your pocket putting on pants you haven't worn in a while and there's a 20 in there that you forgot you had that's great but that was your money to begin with so even though it feels good because you found it that was still your money kind of yeah this is like class action lawsuit money even if it's 529 i'm excited about it but i know when you come across real money unexpectedly and you have to start thinking about how you're going to spend it that's a whole different conversation in your head the best type of unexpected money is you find out that there was a relative you had that you didn't even know so it's not sad that they're dead and you get a call so and so died you had an uncle you didn't know about by the way they

invented the shoehorn or some random thing and they're billionaire and they left you a ton of money and you're like what i know that's a unicorn situation i don't know if that's ever happened to you or someone you know but that's probably as good as it gets and then you know a close second to that would be maybe a lottery win or something but uh postmaster johnny got himself an unexpected the check the other day. That he put no effort into, because with a lottery win you still have to pick numbers, you have to put in effort. It's not totally unexpected, because you bought the ticket.

This was an unexpected call that he received. You got a call, Johnny, or it just showed up in the mail? It showed up in the mail at my mom's house, and she's like, hey, you got a letter, and it came from my last job, and apparently one of my old co-workers, she sued that chiropractic company because they stole hours

from us. It was like wage theft, I believe. So Johnny all of a sudden gets an unexpected letter in the mail opens it up, and inside there's a check. Yep, it was a check for... Can I say the dollar amount? $600. Oh, I thought it was $6,000.

No, it was $600. $600 is a lot to have unexpectedly. That's exciting. Yeah, it's not as exciting as $6,000, though. Well, of course. $600 is... When $6,000 is not as exciting as $600,000, how are we going to keep going?

John, you got $600,000? That's amazing. Now I know why we're talking about this. So the question is, can you spend it on something stupid? You have to, because it's completely unexpected. And $600 is enough to do something fun.

Yeah, it's like not a crazy amount of money to do something wild, but it's also like fun money. How much is that dream guitar you want? Dude, it's like $1,400, but now if I spend $600 towards it, now I only owe $800. Yeah, but then that's not... See, I think it has to be... Interesting.

Well, here's the thing, Johnny. You could gamble on the game today. First game of the NFL season. Double that money. Turn that into a guitar right now. I was thinking about that, because now I can make $1,200. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. But it's free money, though.

It's like money I didn't have before and didn't even know I had. But if you lose, you're going to be so pissed that you couldn't even spend it on anything useful. But if you win, you're only $200 away. If he loses, he's right back to where he was before he even got the letter in the mail, which he wasn't expecting anyway. It's found money. I didn't even know I had it. Are you one of these living paycheck to paycheck people, or do you have savings? No, I have savings, and it's like I was going to be responsible and just save it for Christmas or something.

but I kind of want like a new guitar though boring don't be one of them savers dude that's that's it's important to save

it is important to save you know if you put that in an IRA slowly would accumulate you could have six hundred and five dollars yeah in five years

you can get that guitar by the time you're in your mid-fifties and you can noodle around some tool in the front of the house probably not that soon that's a lose-lose situation it is

so Johnny here's the thing about found money found money you can't think of it the way that Allie's trying to do it, which is the responsible thing and put it away and, you know,

oh, my God, you can put that in, start a 529 savings account. Invest it, put it in a nice business that's growing. Well, I can invest it in a bookie to, like, help, like, make money because, like, if he flips it and it makes $600 into $1,200, now we're talking.

Yeah, you do one of two things. You got that new girlfriend. You guys just moved in together. You either go do a crazy, like, go stay at a hotel, you know, move in, Go somewhere for the night. Go to a hotel, road trip somewhere. Nice hotel.

Yeah, nice hotel, nice dinner. That covers that. That's a good night out. Or we double it right now. Or you take half and save it and spend half on something stupid. It's like splitting the baby, though. That's not fun. Then you go, then that's not fun.

You've made it now responsible. You've made a responsible decision. You're half responsible. That's great. You have to be fully irresponsible. But look how excited my girlfriend would get if I told her, hey, I took the $600 and I actually made it $1,200. That's right.

I'm like 18. She thinks you're a genius. She'll call you Johnny Genius again. You know, 213 said they, sadly, this person won on a $500 Friday from Allie Knows the News, got the $500. Found money. And spent it on rent.

That sucks. Weak. That sucks. That's the worst when you just spend it on bills or a grocery shop or just money that you spend every single week. I get it. I get it. It has to happen.

It sucks. Have to do it. I really want to get, like, the new Xbox and the new GTA 6, too, actually. Yeah, 626 said you should spend it on video games. Yeah, because my girlfriend got mad at me. She's like, you're, like, 28 years old. You don't need to be playing video games no more. Like, why would you buy money?

Sounds like that relationship is taking a use. But she's not wrong, though. She's not wrong because I kind of feel the same way. Andrew on KROQ. Good morning. Hi. Hi, how are you guys? Good.

What's up? So my wife got her car towed for missed payments, and they took the car away when she was making her payments, but then she lost her car and everything but then we got a check in the mail from Chrysler Dodge and Wells Fargo for $15,000 and why?

because they told her car for non-payment when she was making the payment so you just got an unexpected check for $15,000 in the mail what she owed and what she was paying on for months and next thing you know we got a check and it was a blessing in disguise

It was totally... That makes sense. They tow it. Don't you just go to the tow yard and pick it up there? Why is $15,000? No, not at all. No, not... When it's getting towed by the non-paymailer, you can't go and pick it up like that either.

Yeah, the repo guy. You can't just go and pick it up, especially when they just take it like that, and she was making payments. So the $15,000 was for the trouble? Sorry for the inconvenience. It was $15,000? Well, she complained about it for months and everything. Like, I've been up to date on my payments and everything, and, yeah, it was insane.

So what do you do with the $15,000? You had an unexpected check on the mail, $15,000. What do you do with it? Fun? Oh, we went on vacation for sure. Vacation. Yeah, that's right. Now, you could have had a $30,000 vacation if you placed one bet.

Yeah, put that on the Seahawks tonight. Minus three. Squaw! Oh, I'm not betting on the pigeons. All right, he's not betting on the pigeons. What happened to you, Jordan? You got unexpected money? Yeah, I worked for a kidney dialysis place.

I was doing some pretty malpractice stuff. So about two years ago, I got a check for about $4,000 that came in the mail. Pretty much they were doing some messed up stuff. And we made deliveries, that kind of stuff, with like IV infusions. But they were doing some messed up stuff when it comes down to, you know, hooking people up to it. And, yeah, got a call. And you just randomly got a check for $4,000? Yeah, me and like four other people.

It was a pretty small operation, but they closed down. We weren't sure why, and that's obviously why we're there. Did you do something responsible with the $4,000, or did you do something fun with it? Oh, no. I went to Hawaii with my girl at the time. Nice. Nice. These are our listeners.

See, a vacation. That's the girl at the time. Impulsive. Oh, yeah. How'd that end up? Yeah, yeah. Not together anymore? Not so sweet.

Yeah. No, no, no, no. We had a great time. Yeah, that's all that matters. A great Hawaii trip. You know what you're getting into. You can't have a bad time there. That memory will last forever.

Probably banged her in Hawaii, so he's got that memory. Yeah, so for $600, where can that... Yeah, yeah. Johnny, you can get to Victorville. You'll have yourself a decent night there, maybe. I'm going to get my ticket for a Greyhound bus to go see these Broncos lose. Yeah! Johnny, I'm being serious.

All jokes aside, because Allie's going to tell you to do something boring with it. Omar's probably going to tell you to do something smart, but it'll be long-term. I'm telling you right now, by tomorrow morning at this time, that $600 could be $1,200 easy. You want to bet this game goes to overtime tonight? We could turn that $600 into about $4,000. I think I try to really trust you because you're a very betting, skeezy guy. I kind of trust you. You're trusting him because he's a betting, skeezy guy?

He talks so confidently. He talks a good game. Don't talk him out of it. Hey, skeezy. Fine. You do what you want with your money. Skeez, bro. Skeez.

Johnny, no one's laughing now. I'm going to take this tonight. I'll let you know where I'm putting it on. Okay. And you're going to walk in tomorrow with enough to buy that guitar. Really? How much is that guitar with tax and everything? It's probably going to come out to like $1,487.

All right. So we need to get you $1,500. We need to turn $600 into $1,500 in 24 hours. No way. Can you really do that? Oh, yeah. No, he can't. Yes, I can.

He does not do it every year. I don't do it with my money, but I can do it with other people's money. Oh, man. Johnny. I am very curious how this is going to turn out. All right. Worst case scenario, we can't do that then. and we just get an Xbox.

Are you okay servicing other... No, this is the worst case scenario. If you get an Xbox, there's a 100% chance that you're getting an Xbox. Yeah. Then let's get an Xbox. No, no, no, no, no, Johnny, no.

This is going to be fun. No, bad Johnny. Listen to me. Listen to Skis, Uncle Skis. All right, Uncle Skis, go ahead. We are going to turn that money into, I'm going to find a bet that's going to be just a little bit

better than 50-50, odds-wise. Oh, no. And we're going to figure out a way to get you to turn your six into... Maybe I'll go on the couch. I'll figure something out. Well, look, if you could do that, maybe I'll cut you off a little bit to make it worth the effort. Now we're talking. You're going to get a little bit of

zero dollars. Twenty percent. Are you excited? Twenty percent. Okay, let's do it. All right, found money becomes found more money, because that's even better. Yes, but this is a... What's the line tonight, Jake? Is it three? Is Eagles favored by three at home? Eagles is Patriots.

I mean, no, Seahawks are favored by three, right? You're trusting this guy, Johnny? He doesn't even know he's playing tonight. He doesn't even know what's happening. Hold on, hold on, hold on. This guy has bet on Korean table tennis. Yeah, and I won that, by the way. I won until they changed the rules, and then I lost.

This is insane. You know that he's saying he's going to pick a bet where he gets less than 50% odds of it actually working out because you're going to win more money, but it's less likely that it's going to happen. No, don't confuse Johnny. His head's going to explode. Yeah, it might explode, actually.

I'll give you money, Klein, to do it. Yeah, I don't need any money. I'm going to help you win this guitar. I'm going to help you get this guitar. Hell yeah. But is that what you're going to buy if we double the money? Yeah, dude. I want my Thunder Jaguar.

Don't you have guitars? I only have one. I had to sell my last one. I thought you told someone on offer up your girl was pregnant and you needed to sell the guitar for money or something. Bro, don't be blowing my cover like that. Isn't that what happened? Yes.

Okay, yeah. I told them my girlfriend's pregnant just so they don't hassle me, and they were like, okay, and they hand over the money quicker. If you need a stand-in girlfriend, I'll be your pregnant girlfriend. They're going to be real sad then. why was that so silent after no one watched that story I'll pay you more than you ask for

you're good you can take this guitar to hit your girlfriend Katie on KROQ hi good morning hey guys how you doing hi how are you

I got an unexpected check of 700 grand 700 grand yes I can tell because Vanessa wrote she got 700 dollars I haven't been

in six or seven years and it's sad, he OD'd and he was waiting for a settlement money, so he died like nine days before he got the money. So it got passed down to you? Yeah.

What'd you do with it? I don't know yet. It's sitting in an account. Oh, now we're talking. Okay, Klein, what are you going to do with her money? You want me to turn that into a quick $1.4 million? For me to sell $100,000 sounds nice, but I'll tell you what's nice.

A millionaire is nice. Right, right. Although, you know, it should be spent quick. First half spread is looking pretty nice right now. I was very sad for a while, but now I'm stoked. All right. Well, I'm sorry about your loss, but congrats on the money. Hey, Mark, you're on KROQ.

Good morning. Hey, guys. Sweet dibs. Shout out to the NetBangers. Nice. Just a PSA for Johnny. I just want to let you know, be careful betting with Klein because he lost a lot of money to me over the last couple football seasons.

How much money did he owe you? Well, let's see. He lost over $1,000 to me. I think he paid off about $500. All right, that's enough of this guy. You owe somebody money? I don't owe him money. We double or nothing on something.

This could be you, Johnny. Johnny, don't worry about that guy. That's a fake call. Screen the call. Fake what? Daniel hi Hi What's up

Good morning guys Good morning So I got like 1500 bucks From this lumber yard I used to work at Just you know one of those blue collar jobs Where everyone just hates Going there every morning I guess they were just stealing a bunch of hours

From us and underpaying us So that was nice As someone by the way pointed out Johnny really isn't found money Because these were hours Johnny worked He finally just got paid. He didn't realize that he was getting cheaped out on. Yeah, it was just Johnny didn't realize he had to fill out his payment card.

So you got paid. What did you do with the $1,500, Daniel? Well, just a bunch of bills, you know, caught up on car payment. Nah, that sucks, boy. 310 said they got $13,000 after a car accident and went to Japan with their girlfriend. Girlfriend trip, that's a great way to spend it. Yeah. All right, Johnny.

I'm looking. So you got to make a decision now. I'm serious. Like, if you could, like, make some, like, I'm giving you a chance to make money off of this, too. So if you pick well tonight, we'll both be making some money. Okay. I'm on a bit of a cold streak. Squaw!

But I think, no, no, let's go. We're getting guitar, baby. Let's go! We're getting guitar rich. Yeah, with skis. Johnny and skis tonight, NFL action. All right, I figured it out. Crunch the numbers.

Johnny, here's what we're doing tonight. Get ready for this. Hold on. One final word of wisdom from one of the listeners who's on the phone right now that would like to tell you to be smart about your money. Johnny found $600, found money, old job he hasn't had for four years, some sort of class action settlement, got a $600 check in the mail. If we put that on the Patriots to win tonight, outright win, John.

You're going to make $930 on top of your $600, which will give you $1,530. Covers the guitar and enough money for a few picks. You're welcome. Whoa. Do you know how to really do that? Yep. I'll put it in. A Milano.

manolo manolo manolo bro his favorite cookie go ahead manolo welcome to k-rock hi what's up listen client the term to describe you is degenerate gambler that's what we describe you as okay manolo says you're a degenerate gambler okay i'm gonna tattoo that on my left cheek i'd love you to do that i bet you won't how much you want to bet manolo I'll bet him $500 he won't put that tattoo on his body right now. Steve, the degenerate gambler, bro. You want to bet on everything. You want to bet it's going to be hot today?

Yeah, I'll take that. I'll take the over. It's going to be hot today. It's like 90-something. Humidity, too. Okay, so you... You guys are great, man. All right, thank you.

I got to go. All right, thank you. Get that tattoo. Show us proof. I'll give you the money. You really are going to put Johnny's money on the Patriots to win tonight? Yeah, because it'll be double fun. Because, A, Jake will start the season angry.

It's a double win for us, Johnny, if you think about it. Yeah. You'll get the guitar. Jake will be mad. Didn't the Patriots lose pretty badly during the Super Bowl? Yeah, they got smoked. Yeah. But they had a great season.

They had a lucky season. They've had all off-season to think about it, Johnny. Wait, they suck? No, no, they don't suck, dude. They don't suck. They made it to the Super Bowl. One of the greatest teams last year. I don't even like the Patriots.

It was incredible. Yeah, lucky. If you're going to bet, you should bet on the new team that you're a fan of, the Broncos. No, they're trash. All right, you can't say that. You're a big fan now. I mean, yeah, I love the Broncos. All right, so here we go.

So, Johnny, give me that money, and I'm going to call my guy, and I'm going to put that in for you. All right, check yourself. All right. Wow. This is exciting. I actually will be pissed if the Seahawks lose. I know you will.

What happens if he loses? He loses $600? Yes. Oh, my God, Johnny. Yes, Vanessa. What do you think happens? I don't know. You think they go, never mind.

It was all pretend. Let's try again next week. All right, we've got to take a break. We come back in a moment. We have four tickets for you to go to the opening night of Not Scary Farm. We'll do that. Also get into a brand-new hour of the show. And we'll share some of our stories about times we've been injured by food.

Specifically, Klein's times he's been injured by food. I do have to get stitches for something that happened over the weekend. I mean, because of a taco shell. I'm not going to get into it now, but I'm just saying. This is my third massive food-related injury. And do you remember the last injury that you had where you sneezed out a sandwich and got a brain-eating amoeba? Well, I don't know if that's because of the sandwich,

but I did get part of the sandwich stuck in my nose for weeks. Might still be in there, some of it. I think so. Hey, but Johnny, let me be your financial advisor, okay? Okay, Rock, we are Klein Alley Show. Let's find out what's happening in the world with the ADD News. Then a brand new hour of the show will officially begin. We got lots of tickets to give you today and access

and, of course, mediocre content, as we are known for around these parts and much more after this. Grab your Adderall. It's time for ADD News. All right, it's official. Girl Scouts have announced their new cookies for the year, a.k.a. the new way they're trying to swindle you into spending more than you wanted to spend when you leave the grocery store.

They are getting into the dog treat game with Patch Pals. Who will accidentally buy these thinking that they're meant for humans? They do have a giant picture of a dog on the front of the box, but that won't deter people like Omar who have boughten dog food on multiple occasions. I stand by Omar as a man who accidentally bought Ben and Jerry's dogs and ate that myself. And that was a pint of ice cream because I didn't know Ben and Jerry's were doing the same thing for dogs. They have dog ice cream, and I ate that. Omar, after looking at the packaging of the thing he ate, yes, there was a dog on it.

But it was small. It wasn't, like, big. They actually changed the packaging now. Yeah, Omar did make a serious change in society. After Omar? Yeah, and I don't know how you get qualified to get some sort of a Nobel Prize or whatever, but what Omar did for society was big because I looked at the packaging after Omar

sat down and ate. Ate a lot of it. Ate a lot of it. I was like, yeah, man, this has no taste. What is happening here? Did you think that about the Ben & Jerry's too, that it was bland? It must have been. It felt like it

was lacking sweet and I remember thinking to myself, I think I either have a cold or COVID again. That's like the only flavor of ice cream. I know and there was no They were sweet, but then I thought maybe I accidentally bought healthy, and I was so relieved when I found out it was not healthy. It was just dog. This tastes like chicken parts. They also have Girl Scout Sparkables, which is their first allergy-friendly cookie.

They are oatmeal cookies with chocolate chips and sprinkles, and they are developed with allergy-friendly patrons in mind. I'd rather have the dog one, I think. At least it's oatmeal with chocolate chips and not oatmeal raisin. raisin. Right, yeah. They do double down on terrible when they throw the oatmeal on the raisin. Yeah, I mean, no one likes oatmeal raisin, right? You ever see a cookie platter, one of those variety cookie platters?

I mean, I'll tell you, the first to go, chocolate chip, first to go, first round graphic. It's the classic, of course. And then you get some other randoms that go. And you get like a sugar cookie person who's like, mmm, I love shortbread. Yeah, a couple snickerdoodles will be gone, but I'll tell you what's always left there, and I can see it from a thousand miles away.

It's oatmeal raisins, and a lot of times their oatmeal raisins were picked up, someone definitely took a bite. It was like, I thought that was a chocolate chip. Threw it right back down on the tray. I know. People accidentally eating oatmeal cookies is definitely a whole different category. That's the best one, dude. I literally got accosted over the weekend for picking one up at a party.

Made me put it down. You got made fun of? You got accosted? Yeah, like literally, he's like, so I saw you pick up that oatmeal raisin cookie. What the hell was that about? And I was like, damn, bro. Damn, can I eat an oatmeal raisin cookie? I can't have this cookie.

What the hell? Did that voice again, Allie? No. There was a record-breaking game. What kind of racist cookie person are you? I was doing a Johnny impression. Oh, that was Johnny. Yeah, it was Johnny. Yeah, Johnny Cochran it sounded like. The U.S. Open last night, they had a record-breaking match or game or whatever they call it.

It was the latest match in U.S. Open history. It went until 3.30 in the morning. The game was almost four and a half hours long, and it was an important one for the U.S. because Ben Shelton won it at the end. He is going to the finals. So this is, an American man has not won a Grand Slam in 23 years, not since Andy Roddick. So here are some of the highlights of the game if you missed it. I'll play them for you.

Here we go. Where's the grunting? The men don't grunt so much. I've got the grunting. Oh, Ali's got the grunting one. Hold on, Ali's got the real one. That was just generic tennis sense. Oh, I'm playing fine.

Here we go, here we go. also this guy is It's kind of a little bit of a ham. Like, when he actually won, he did that whole, like, lion tongue-out thing where he was like, yeah! I was like, wow. The guy was an 11 seed. He beat a 2 seed. Beat one of the greats.

And it was pretty incredible because the guy was down and then came back and ended up winning that final. I didn't watch any of this, of course. And you know so much about this guy. I did study up this morning because apparently it's a big deal in the world of men's tennis. He's a dad. Dad knows tennis. Gotta watch some tennis. He has a white hat. He knows tennis. That's right.

That's right. You better believe it. You have a nice crisp hat. You like tennis. And then finally, I think this is good news for our trash museum. Tame Impala has told fans he will no longer be signing autographs because there are aggressive autograph hounds that are using kids as a tactic just to get signatures and then resale things online.

And we do have an item in our trash museum that is signed by Tame Impala and it could be one of the last signed items ever. I think he refused to sign. No, no, no. He did. I had to actually, like, get him to sign it, and he gave me this, like, goofy look. Yeah, so he did sign it. What did Tim and Paula add to our trash museum?

It was a Chex Mix snack bag. Yeah, it's in there. Nice. And it is signed, is it not? Yeah, I think we're going to put this trash museum on the road. You know, originally, the Celebrity Trash Museum, I think, was, if you go through the history of K-Rock, I believe that was an idea that Jimmy Kimmel wanted to do here years ago when he was with Kevin and Bean, and they never started doing it.

He wanted to do it. They never did it. So I feel like we built this Celebrity Trash Museum as kind of a tribute to Kimmel. We even bought shelves. And the goal would be that eventually Kimmel lets us go on to his late night show and display, you know, like a lot of times they have like a third guest that no one cares about on those shows. They'll be like, George Clooney. That could be us.

Yeah, we could be the third guest no one cares about. And we come out there and we share some of the greatest celebrity trash we've collected here at K-Rock. I think the best shot we have is to be like the warm-up people in the audience. Oh, man, that's a terrible joke. Those poor people. I think there's guest number three, and then there's the warm-up guy. The warm-up guy, who sometimes will fill in when all the guests cancel. And then they're like, and now Don Barris is here to do three minutes of stand-up.

Yeah, but they work hard. They do. If you've ever been to those tapings, you're like, this person is sweating their ass off trying to keep this audience interested. Drove Brody Stevens to kill himself. That job, that's how hard it was. And that guy was one of the best there was in the biz at that. Yeah, for sure. All right, we get into a brand new hour of the show in moments.