Klein/Ally Show: The Podcast - I'm So Wet I'm Sprouting! (FULL SHOW 7/16)

Episode Date: July 16, 2026

LA is baking in a heat wave, so we sent Jake the Nerd back into the wild for Pit Stops! Armed with his nose and a microphone, he sniffed strangers' armpits to find out who passed the freshness test. Luckily this time he came prepared with Klein.Ally.Show-branded deodorant stick for everyone who needed it. You're welcome! Comedian Pat McGann stopped by the studio to talk about the highs and lows of parenting, and helped listeners survive the second half of summer by dishing out advice for dealing with their most annoying kids. Meanwhile, Klein paid a visit to a questionable dentist to get a bizarre medieval-looking mouth device to help alleviate his snoring. He also told him he needs to improve his chi and somehow make his tongue less fat. We're convinced he's being scammed. Plus, the generations went head-to-head once again in Gen Wars, and geophysicist Stefan Burns joined us to break down the recent Kern County earthquakes, explain what they could mean for California, and share why he thinks the long-feared "Big One" may be closer than we think.

About to get into a brand new episode of Klein Alley Show, but first let's tell you about our good friends at the finest airport that ever was and ever will be. The San Bernardino International Airport. Especially when there's summer travel plans, it can get expensive at these airports. That's why you got to go to this airport where parking is just five bucks a day. Plus you got those easy trips, San Francisco or Provo, Utah. Maybe you didn't plan anything this summer. See how easy it is. Don't be one of those people who has to pack your patience. Go to San Bernardino International Airport. Okay, enough shilling. Now it's time to get into a brand new episode of Klein Alley Show. Hey, what's going on, Klein Alley?

Are you ready? I love Klein Alley, you little bitch. Klein Alley, it's just okay. Just don't let things bother you too much. Good morning, everybody. Hey, what up, Klein Alley? Whoa, sweet damn it, Stink, did you see that? Meet me at the Klein Alley Show.

Let's get this show started. The show started. the show started we are live in los angeles three two one and here we go it's klein alley show low 6.7 kro qfm and hd pasadena los angeles orange county the sonic pulse of los angeles this is the world famous k-rock oh yeah good morning welcome to your bf thursday it is the frequent it's here we are klein alley show nice to meet you thanks for Coming back for more, thanks for listening to us. If you're stuck in the back of a rideshare on the way to the airport, regardless,

we are here with you for the next four hours plus, and we'll make it worth your while with tickets to Disneyland, tickets to Evanescence at the Kia Forum, and I'm sure much, much, much, much more. My name's Klein. There's Allie. Morning. That is DJ Omar Khan right there. He is the audio sniper extraordinaire.

Then there's Jake the Nerd. What's that? Who was smelling armpits all over the streets of Burbank yesterday for the first official pit check, pit stops of the new heat wave summer. I have a great job. It's a great job. I was listening to some of his audio this morning. We'll get to it later, Allie. And it turns out, from what I could tell, a lot of people stank pretty bad yesterday. Yeah, yesterday was bad. I went swimming with my kid and we got in the pool and it just felt like I was in a warm bath.

I was just like, ugh, this isn't even refreshing. It's so warm everywhere. In the back taking the calls, Vanessa and Postmaster Johnny, the number to join us, to text us, to interact with the show, 800-520-1067. Vanessa is completely flip-flopped for loyalty. You know, she was all about Colombia, go Colombia. And lately, she now has completely jumped on the Spain bandwagon. She's on the Spain train. But it's interesting to see why she is with Spain now and how she was also telling us who we need to root for

based on our American history. It was very strange yesterday. By the way, every time there's been a World Cup game, which has been going on now for, it feels like, forever. Obviously, there's only, you know, one game left, minus the loser game, which is happening on Saturday, between the, you know, the third and fourth, I think France and England.

Oh, there is? I didn't even know that. There's a loser game on Saturday, but apparently it's still a big deal, I guess. Who knows? Vanessa has been so, she, it's almost like she's made it her mission to make us want to care about soccer in the same way that she cares about it.

And every show, pretty much for the last month now, she's come in here and gotten mad at us. She's mad at us for every reason, though. She's mad at us when we don't care about it. I have the mad testosterone. Sports, bitches. Sports. Well, okay.

I don't know what any of that is. That's what's happening. But she does have the highest testosterone on the show, as we learned. And I think it's all, she's like roid raging or something about World Cup stuff. Because if we come in here and say we didn't watch it, she gets mad. If we say we watched it, she goes, you don't even know what you're watching. She's like, oh, bandwagoners. We're like, what do you want from us?

Meanwhile, she's out there going by in a Spain jersey, which is like unbelievable. I didn't know that you, like, your loyalty is to a certain team or a certain country, and then when they lose, you just completely choose a different team, and you're all about that team and getting a jersey for that team. It's wild to me that you can switch so easily. Well, for the World Cup ones, your team's out. You, like, every game you choose someone. Because you want to root for a country.

Yeah, but it's, like, you think about the Super Bowl, you're going to pick somebody, but you're not going to buy a jersey for that team and be that into it. Well, this time, I feel it in my heart because it's against Argentina. She really hates Argentina. She hates Argentina, which is real. I don't hate Argentina. I hate the team. Because I would think that Vanessa, who's from Colombia, her team's out, so you pick a...

The closest proximity. Another South American place. That is how some people choose. Some people are like, let's keep it at home, as in like South America. And I was like, nah, they already won. They're too cocky over there. Give it to the underdog So, I mean, not much of an underdog

They're the second best team in all of the world I think they did win a couple of World Cups ago But here, listen, this is Vanessa yesterday Harassing us, I mean, bullying us, to be honest We're all getting these voice memos throughout the day yesterday But aren't you so happy that you're getting them? No I think you are

I'm happy Goddammit, guys, Argentina just scored So it's now 1-1 If you can, please watch this game Because this is an important one Every game, she has said They're all important ones I mean, but she has been telling us this, the amount of messages we've got about whatever you're doing, stop doing it and put on the game.

And my interest for yesterday's game was to periodically check the score and go home. And I hope you're going for England. They are your colonizers, so you should. Damn it, Argentina, this game was almost over. Now we're going to go into over time. Jesus. She's getting more stressed out as the game goes on. And I can't even, and if I'm a little behind or if I move away from the TV for a moment,

I don't want to get these updates from Vanessa. She's going to spoil it, right? Yeah, she spoils everything. Oh, my God. Forget it. Argentina just scored again. I mean, I can't even, I can't even catch up with the game. She's moving faster than the game is.

This is ridiculous. I'm mad. There's eight more minutes. I have a feeling they could win. Come on, England. You hear that guy yelling goal in the back. She's so mad. It's like a dying cow.

Come on, England. nine plus nine, and Argentina just f***ing scored. God damn it. Oh, my gosh. Let me tell you something. Only Argentina is happy. Only Argentina. And the fakers that don't know about soccer,

and they're like, ah, Messi, ah. No, no one is happy right now. No one is happy except for... The guy in the background screaming seems pretty happy. He seems really happy. And the people that don't know about soccer that go for Messi. F*** this. jeez whoa aggressive i didn't realize that messy was like the mahomes of the soccer world it was

like why does this guy keep winning he plays differently than everybody else why is he successful he's too cocky there's a lot of hate for him just like they always do with like the tom brady and oh they get the calls the refs on their side they favored the sport right the league is doing things to try to make them go further because it's better for jersey sales and better for world, you know, dominance. So there's a lot of thoughts where people feel like other countries are not

getting the fair shake, right? I think what I'm going to do is I'm going to go all in on Team USA Women's. Boom. Oh, my God. Yeah, I'm excited for Women's World Cup.

Why aren't we focused on that? We've won, like, four of them. Four or five. Moving on. Let's go with a team that actually wins. If they get messy on their team,

I'll start watching. We got a decent show in store for you, believe it or not. And we will make it all worth your while. Ali's Money coming up in about five minutes

or less. If you want it, keep listening to K-Rock. K-Rock, we are Klein and Ali's show, and people are pointing out a lot now. We're not going to spend most of the show talking about World Cup stuff, but people are pointing out now that I was exactly right and exactly wrong about my prediction yesterday about the game that took place. I

forgot about that, and then there was this message on the goat line. Klein, your winning-losing streak continues as you once again have predicted the wrong team to win the game. But you got the score right, so that's something, eh? My prediction yesterday was actually spot on because I have the audio of it, Allie.

And if you remember what I said yesterday, I said, I'm going to be wrong. So do the opposite of what I said. And you were right. And the opposite of what I said was exactly what happened. This was yesterday this happened. I'm going to make a bet for the World Cup game today. It's Argentina versus England. I was wondering who you think is going to win.

Well, I've been wrong on every prediction I've made so far. So I would go with the exact opposite of what I tell you right now. That's how I started the call. I said, go with the opposite. And if she had gone with the opposite of what I said, she would have been in the money. Okay. I believe that England will win the game today. Okay.

And it will be an England-Spain World Cup Finals. Okay. I don't believe that Messi is going to get any, and it's hard for me to say that because I look like the guy, but... Any goals? I don't think he's getting any goals today. Zero. He's going to be shut out. Oh.

Okay. So take... Do you think Argentina is going to get any goals? Argentina will score. Our final score will be 2-1. Okay. All right. Thank you.

You're welcome. Enjoy, Pasi. The exact opposite. 2-1. Yeah, but you were right that Messi didn't score any goals. No goals. But, of course, the headlines were, like, Messi leads team to victory. Of course.

Exactly. What? Exactly. The text line is saying, you know, that FIFA decided to make Messi the golden poster boy because he cried and quit playing and all this other stuff. There's a lot of reasons why people, the world, has really gotten against Argentina. But I think they're embracing it. To be the villain, sometimes you embrace that role.

And you go, now let's go ahead and show the world. And he's the short king. Short king. He's got a lot to prove. I get it. I get it. He needs more cups to stand on. Ali wants me to go out today in a messy jersey and try to get a bunch of free stuff, pretending

I'm messy at local businesses. And I want you to work on your accent, your Argentinian accent. What would that sound like? No, no bueno. Go ahead. No bueno. Do it, do it. No, no bueno.

No bueno. Does he have a high-pitched mousy voice like Beckham, too? No, I don't think he does. I've heard him speak, but I don't think he has a weird voice. But you can do that just for funsies. Maybe I'll go places and I'll bring a translator, and then I can just kind of babble. And then the translator can say, like, give him something free. This is messy.

Yeah, and then you can put your arms out wide like he does and do the bird fly thing. I've got to get a lot of tattoos between now and then to make that happen. Quick break. We're back in a moment. Already people on the phone want Allie's money. If you want some cash to start your Thursday and start your pre-quend with, Give us a call now, 800-520-1067. Five questions about things in the news.

Do better than Allie, and she will pay you some money. She is currently undefeated this week. Rarely will she get through an entire week without paying the people. So today could be your day. Call now and get paid next on KROQ. Number City on KROQ. We are Klein Allie's show. In a moment, you'll have a chance to take Allie's cash.

A hundred bucks could be yours. On this thrifty Thursday, El Cheapo hates parting with her money every single day of the week, but especially on a Thursday. It burns her twice, so I hope you win. And if you're on the phone right now, please study up so you know a thing or two about what's happening in the world. Ali is feeling... I'm the messy of Ali Knows the News. She's unbeatable, but also hateable at the same time.

Everyone hates me, but I love to win. So she's going to get the hell out of the studio in a moment. But first, let's say hi to Nate in North Hollywood, who would like to take your money this morning. Hey, Nate, good morning. Hey, how's it going? It's going fine with us. Hopefully, it's going to go a lot better with you. All you've got to do is answer these questions quickly, confidently, and accurately.

No cheating. Allie's going to go ahead and sequester herself out there in the asbestos-filled hallways of K-Rock, which is probably great for an unborn baby. And as soon as she's out of here and that door is closed, your round will begin. Here we go. Allie knows the news. We should probably start with the biggest story in the world right now. Now, Costco is getting a new hot food item at their California location food courts.

What is making its way to Costco food courts? California. Chicken tenders, chicken strips. Chicken tendies. We go to question number two. There's a cheating scandal happening at the California DMV. In a sentence, what exactly is the cheating scandal taking place at the California DMV that's being investigated? It's something with the written test.

There's like 11,000 people have to retake it or something like that. You go to question number three right now. Off to a great start. 95-year-old William Shatner has just been announced to be joining the lineup of what music festival taking place? Coachella. Go to Coachella. All right, write that down. We go to question number four.

The very funny Danny McBride will be directing a movie based on what toy slash animated show? Ooh, I don't know. Elmo. Elmo. And we go to this final question. Campbell's Soup. Been there for us during the Great Depression. Still there for us now.

In case you're going through a breakup, want to eat right out of the can like a hobo, has just announced that they're getting into something very trendy in the world of food. And what have they announced that they'll be releasing? Special Campbell's with what? Creatine. Creatine.

Oh, my God. You better believe I'll be first in line for that. All right, send Allie in. We'll score it together. Oh, man, it's chicken creatine. Oh, don't say anything else. Allie's reentering the studio. Let's not give her any hints.

All right, she's back in now. Once again, you're battling this guy. Nate wants your money, and he wants it now. Allie, I'm going to tell you something about Nate. He didn't suck. Okay. Which is something I can't say about a lot of the contestants during Allie Knows the News. Can't say it about me.

Definitely cannot. Question one. Costco, food court, getting themselves a new hot item in California locations. What is coming to Costco food courts? Big news. They don't make changes often. A tamale? Tamale.

Interesting guess. Terrible guess, but interesting one. I'll tell you who got it right. Nate gave us the answer of chicken tendies. Ah, tendies. And tendies are going everywhere these days. Universally loved by children. And adults.

And adults. And her. So what the hell? Why not? And I'm sure if Costco's doing it, their Kirkland Tendies are probably great. I'm sure they're awesome. And I think that it transcends. It's everybody's go-to, I think, for any concert or game at a stadium.

Yeah, there's a lot of food my kids order and don't finish. But I get real excited when they don't finish their tendies. Yeah. Because that means I get some half-eaten tendies. All right, we've got a question two. That's a one-nothing. Nate is in the lead early. Love it.

I had a feeling this morning when I woke up. Today's the day I was going to pay out. Just had that feeling. Question two. So, the California DMV is involved in some sort of a cheating scandal right now. In one sentence, can you describe exactly what is happening at the California DMV? I think everyone has to retake the written test. He said that as well.

Thousands of people. Apparently, there was a whole bunch of cheating going on with the written test. Cheating big. Yeah. And the written test at the California DMV, I mean, if you ever got your driver's license, you know the written test part, I think, should not be very important at all. Oh, it's very important. The driving part is the only thing that matters.

There's a lot of people that can do well on written tests because you can remember stuff, but you can't drive for S. Yeah, I know, but how many times did people fail the written test? Me, twice, three times. I think I, yeah, I can't remember how many times I had to take it. But I'm not good at testing,

and apparently that question about how long do you wait before you can drink alcohol and drive, you don't write when you feel better, which is what I thought every time. Roll down the windows. Yeah, so that's wrong. To help you wake up.

All right, you guys both get the point. 2-1, Nate is still in the lead. We go to question number three. 95-year-old William Shatner has just been added to the lineup of what music festival? Oh, man, I saw this and I can't remember.

Band's Warped Tour? I know, that's not right. That's a terrible... That'd be so funny, though. William Shatner Skateboards over there? Yeah. That is not right.

He said Coachella, also not right. Riot Fest. Oh, right. He's going to be backed by a metal band. He's going to be going to Riot Fest.

We go to your next question and answer. And by the way, Ali, still down one with two questions left. Danny McBride. Very funny, Danny McBride has been tapped

to direct a movie based on what toy slash animated show? Is it G.I. Joe? He said Elmo, but the correct answer is G.I. Joe. G.I. Joe. Knowing is half the battle. And now Ali has tied things up. Amazing, exciting.

One to two now. Wow, this is where it gets good. It's like the game yesterday. It really is. Coming up from behind. Final question. All comes down to this. Question number five.

And I want to say, however this goes, Nate, I like the way you played the game. Campbell's Soup has been around for a long-ass time, but they are now getting involved in a very trendy thing in food with a new release that they've announced. What is the new announcement from Campbell's? I know you'll be happy about this because they are releasing five new protein soups. Okay.

Oh, no. He said creatine soup, so he was getting close. That's, yeah, I mean, it's basically the same thing. Nah, different. The correct answer is protein soup. I do think a creatine craze is going to be next, though. Wow, that's exciting. Well, listen, Nate, you put in a valiant effort.

I wish we had money for you. We do not. And what must you shamefully admit is Allie has got that smug-ass look on her pregnant face. My name is Nate, and Allie knows the news. That's right. Thank you for that, Nate. Tomorrow morning, at this exact time, $500 up for grabs. It's a $500 Friday.

So if you didn't call today or you didn't get through, it's okay. Tomorrow's going to be your day with us right here on KRO. It's a good day to be locked in, not only because we have your Disneyland tickets coming up later. We've been talking about that. But I believe at some point during the show today, we will receive a box in the mail. And inside of that box will be a couple of very limited edition Klein Alley Show merch drops, including the Make Alley Fat Again hats, which we're so excited to have. It's happening, guys.

We were going to have those hats made regardless if she was pregnant or not. So if you think it's being insensitive, don't worry. The plan was to fatten Alley up regardless. So you think after this baby is born, I should just stay fat? Oh, yeah. Oh, dude, yeah, totally. For the sake of comedy and for the sake of pretty much all other things, yes, you must stay fat. I can't go the way of, like, Rebel Wilson and Mindy Kaling, the people that just look weird, skinny.

They've all gotten unfunny. They've all gotten unfunny. And, like, serious about their nutrition and health and stuff. Boring. It's the worst. No one wants that. So we got that to look forward to. Also, very excited.

I do believe today we will see the first ever batch of I've Never Been Intimate with Jake shirts. That was fast. Which, listen, when you've got the right thing at the right time, when lightning strikes, you've got to hit it. And people are very excited about these shirts. I think they're going to arrive today. I think they even have different colors. People are demanding them. And you'll have a chance.

When they arrive, we'll start giving them out immediately. So I'm catching up on the podcast. And you guys mentioned, you know, the shirt that you guys have for Jake, which is a phenomenal idea. Wonderful. Jake needs one more shirt to add to the pile. you know but you also stumbled upon another really good idea that's theoretically fun like screw having jake's name on it just have a shirt that says theoretically fun and then on the back the client alley show on k-rock you guys would you guys would sell so many shirts so many like

that's easy money y'all all right bye we're not we're not uh selling the shirt thank you for the eggs, y'all. We're not selling the shirts. We're just giving them to you for putting up with us every morning. We can't make money off you. At least we can do. Vidal on KROQ. Quickly, because then I've got to talk about why I was at a doctor before we even went on the air, which is crazy to think that a doctor wanted to see me at

5 a.m. this morning. What's up, Vidal? Hey, what's up, Tyne? How are you? I'm all right. What's up? Just wanted to let you guys know that you guys are being really badly influenced by that Colombian girl. Nah!

Vanessa, let the man speak. Hold on. You may speak. Why is Vanessa influencing us in a bad way? Because if there's a storyline here, Messi is actually the good guy and Ronaldo the bad guy. Nobody hates Messi. Like, everybody loves Messi,

but you guys are getting the whole idea that they hate on him because they make calls for him. No, he doesn't even, he gets followed all the time. And he's a good guy. Everybody loves him. Like, don't trust. Well, I think it is the top-selling jersey in all of professional soccer. I think one of the top-selling jerseys in the world, obviously.

So, listen, some people have to love him if they're going to get his name, walk around with his name. Vanessa's got her own opinions about it. And Vanessa, as we've learned, does not like anyone to have opinions other than hers. We must all share her opinions. Yeah, and if we didn't share it from the beginning, then we can't then have her opinion because then she's still mad we didn't have her opinion from

the beginning i uh i had to go to see a doctor before getting in here today which seems crazy because can't be a legitimate doctor if they're going to see you at five in the morning well i was they called during the show the other day and i said i can't talk now i'm on the air and then afterwards i tried to set an appointment and i couldn't none of the times worked it was all we're on the air for everything and he goes and i think he only works the first part of the day doctors these days oh they're like last patient 11 a.m yeah they're like i don't do i don't see people fridays i don't see people mondays i do a couple i don't understand sometimes i'm in this office sometimes i'm in this office what are you doing guys how much money they're making where they

can just decide they're gonna see two people a week and call it a week but regardless the guy says uh i said i'm not gonna be able to he goes well when do you get into work i said six ish he goes uh you need i can see you at five i go a.m he goes sure if you can be here at 5 a.m i'll see at 5 a.m so i went and saw this guy this is about my snoring situation which as you know i've done so many things to try to deal with it it's a terrible sound and i feel i feel bad for my wife feel bad for the dog that's real sounds of me snoring that's not a sound effect and uh it's only gotten worse since i did the second surgery now two different surgeries to try to stop the snoring from happening it's only gotten worse the snoring maybe you have to just

embrace that you're never going to get rid of it. And now I understand why he wants to see you at 5 a.m. because all the snoring people are awake. And why are you anti CPAP machines? He said that's not going to do it. He said that's not going to do anything for me. He said

that I've got a fat tongue. I suffer from sausage toe and a fat tongue. And the fat tongue is not going, even though I've made so much extra space in my neck, supposedly I'm not letting any air flow. And a CPAP machine is going to force air where there shouldn't be air. Have you ever done a sleep study?

Well, yeah. That's how this whole thing started, dude. So they didn't recommend a CPAP machine at all? No. They just recommended surgery. Wow. They said I had no space. The CPAP would do nothing. There was nowhere for the air to go. So now... It would just balloon up your face. That's what happened.

You would just inflate and go to the ceiling. Looked like one of those caricatures they draw of you at the zoo. Cool. You'd be like a Macy's parade. So this guy says, get here at 5 in the morning. I said, that's insane. I've never heard in my life about doing this. Does he work out of a van? That's what I thought, too. He's got a legitimate

office, and he said, the best part is you don't have to feed the meters. Oh, yeah, that is nice. He said, that is the best part. So I go, and I walk in, and he's there, and I say, how long have you been here? He goes, I like to come in at 3. Guy comes in at 3 a.m. This guy's got to be crazy.

This is a red flag. It is. He did have a lot of plants in the office, like way more plants than there should be in a doctor. Real plants or fake plants? They're real, like real plants. Dude is kind of like holistic and weird, like I thought. And he's feeling my neck, and he's rubbing my throat, and he's got his fingers in my mouth and doing something with my tongue. And he says, my chi is off. And then he says.

No, he said that for reals? Yeah, dude. He said, your chi is off. That's the way to fix your chi, his D in your mouth? He said, yeah, I got to fix your chi with my D. I said, hey, as long as it's covered by insurance. And then he. Come on, you don't have to feed the meter.

And then he did some. Feed me. And then he proceeded to tell me that I am carrying too much stress in my jaw. And the stress that I'm carrying in my jaw is the reason why I'm snoring. And I said, what kind of weird hippie ass crap is this? And he goes, I will fix you, but it's going to be a process. And basically. How are you going to eliminate stress in your jaw?

Especially when talking is your job every day. He said it's not about talking He said I live a stressful life I need to let thoughts What his job is He's a dentist He's a dentist He has come up

As somebody who has been victimized By a horrible dentist And he was a guy who talked to me About all kinds of stuff And no other dentist does this Didn't he say that? I'm not like other dentists Did he brag about his clients?

he did mention some of the people he's given this he's he's helped this problem with did he say he invented a new way that nobody else knows yeah five patents that these are all the things that my dentist said before he totally effed up my mouth well and then i had major jaw problems the guy and then no one would work on my job because they didn't want to get sued the guy showed me some sort of a contraption it looked like sure he did it looked like a penis it looked like what is this contraption it's a condom

it's two balls in a shaft in a shaft he showed me this thing he built and it looks like something like a kid would put together

with like random stuff and he goes this is going to go in your mouth and if I approve you I haven't been approved yet it's a whole approve process oh okay

yeah let's take beds and see if you get approved this is how cults start hold on this is exclusive okay maybe I'll accept you as one of my clients

he said if he chooses me he'll solve this problem He chooses me. He didn't even charge me for the meeting. He just said, go on your way. I'm sure he didn't because he's going to gouge you later. He said, I'll call you back. He said, this thing looked like a weird ass.

Can you find this guy online or see any reviews about him? Have you looked into? No, I didn't do any of that. What's this thing supposed to do? Okay, Omar, great question. It fits around. It's supposed to stretch your jaw for us. It fits around my mouth

About the size of Aiden The top of my mouth Again, ball gag It's a ball gag Is it a ball gag? And I stand in his closet And I wait for him to leave This leash is an important part of it

Guys, this is medicine It's a Okay, it's some sort of a weird Wiry, almost like Remember when the nerds used to wear the head uh head gear it's like head gear it doesn't go around your whole head though it just goes around the top teeth and then it's got this device this is where he said the magic happened oh my god and uh device is like a it's like a silicone ball of some sort oh my god do

you hear yourself yes when i say it out loud it sounds ridiculous how did you meet this guy did somebody tell you about him in a boba shop someone at a farmer's market there you go mentioned that they knew of a guy that was a telltale of a man that can stop snoring no matter what what the situation is and you said i'll ask no more questions i'll be there yeah so you put this thing in your mouth and it's going to move your tongue aside to allow airflow yeah it pushes your tongue down my fat ass tongue and it pushes it out of the way to eliminate the gag reflex to to allow him and his assistant at the same time to allow more airflow because the snoring apparently i thought was happening because of my stupid nose and i've been doing it all wrong

it's nothing to do with that has to do with the the the soft the roof of my mouth or something and the tongue so has he accepted you no i don't know so you're waiting to get a phone call whether or not you've been accepted for the contraption he says he'll call me in a few weeks if i'm if A few weeks? Seven days to a few weeks, depending on if I'm up for it or not. You think it's a scam? Yes, I'm telling you, I think all of this is weird. I think he accepts everybody.

Yeah, I don't think that he chooses and potentially rejects clients. What is this contraption cost? I didn't get into that. He didn't mention it. You didn't ask questions about the money? I did say, is this covered by insurance? And he said it is a medical device, so it'll be covered by medical insurance, not dental insurance. that part he said, but he said, I need to walk

you through how to try to get reimbursed for it. So it wasn't like an easy peasy situation. So I don't know what the thing cost. It looks like it was made by, he showed me the thing. I thought it was a prototype. I thought he was going to say, this is how it began. And now here's the new one. It looks like something a kid built in arts and crafts. But he goes, you're going to put this in your

mouth. You're going to wear it around your teeth. It's going to jam your tongue down. You're not going to be able to sleep. Well, he said maybe that's why the snoring stops. Yeah, it's just awake. Just constantly awake. Bring him in another 5 a.m. appointment because I've been up all night.

I don't know how your morning was, but mine was weird as hell. Mine was same. Same, same, same? Same, same. All right, but I do think, by the way, all of that aside,

if you're a doctor, why don't you start opening up some 5 a.m. appointments for people? I think people, the general public would greatly appreciate it. No, that is kind of nice

because of the meter. We've got to take a quick break. A lot of people are saying scam alert, run. Now I'm nervous. You are the scam guy. You're the guy who gets scammed. So this is par for the course.

We'll take a quick break. We get back in a moment. We got the news to get to, a brand new hour of the show, Disneyland tickets, and much more after this. K-Rock, we're your Klein Alley Show. Hey, Brittany, what's going on? You're on K-Rock. Hi. Hi, how's it going, guys?

Fine. What can we do? So, I heard your story about going to the dentist or whatever, whatever that guy was. Or whatever that guy was. It's a dentist on the door. It's a dentist. I'm sorry. Yeah, sure, sure.

And so the thing that I shouldn't talk to you about is you have to be super careful with what you put in your mouth because it can, if you put it in there for long enough, it can totally jack up your teeth and cause more problems. That'll be fun for you. You don't have any teeth problems. Nothing. Just more problems. We're all real. All right. Well, thank you, Brittany.

A lot of people warning me what to look out for. I don't think most people believe the story I just told to be a legitimate man. But I just showed Allie his picture, and now she believes that he— Picture he's wearing a coat. He's got a tie. Guy owns a tie. You also showed me his physical business card, which has curly cursive on it, which is another big red flag. Mm-hmm.

The more curly cursive, the more they're hiding. You think the fancier the font looks? Yes. When you think about every hotel, a crappy hotel, a crappy restaurant, when they've got a lot of curly cursive, they're hiding something. I knew a guy that went to jail for, like, fraud or embezzlement, and I had his business card, and he had fancy gold, like, the most cursive-y cursive on his card. Right, and I feel like people that don't have anything to hide are just bold print. Right. Nothing.

Just visca print. Here I am. Yes. Not hiding anything. Just a symbol. Not even a name. Figure it out. Let's get to your news right now, and then a brand new hour of the show will begin.

Grab your Adderall. It's time for ADD News. There is geyser-like gushing happening in West Hollywood this morning, which normally would be any other morning in WeHo, except the fact that this is a massive water main break that has been flooding the streets. This has been happening since about 4 in the morning. There is an insane amount of water flooding the streets, coming down the hills. Cars are being pushed down the streets.

People are being trapped in the cars that are smashing into each other. Everyone's okay so far. There have been no injuries. but underground parking garages already have water up to the entrance gates. So people's cars are completely submerged. People are waking up and frantically moving their cars before it's too late. The metro yard, where there's a bunch of buses parked, has also been flooded. They're moving, like they moved out a bunch of the buses. The water was coming up to the headlights as they were driving them out.

And the problem was that this was happening for hours because three different companies were in the area and they didn't know who the water main belonged to. so they had to be like whose problem is this whose responsibility is it to turn off the water eventually they figured out it was the LADWP so they shut off the water finally but not before the giant sinkhole opened up on the sidewalk two guys fell into that sinkhole in West Hollywood has got to be a big big deal that's a new club that's got to be exciting yeah absolutely and you look at it and it's an entire side of the sidewalk that is just completely caved in but

But there's a bunch of roads, too, that are just... I mean, you know our infrastructure. It handles rain and moisture so well. So great. Everything just completely falls apart when there's a flood or a river. But hey, sinkhole, two guys have fallen in already and more are on the way. I bet they are rushing. Let's get down to that sinkhole quickly.

Rushing and gushing. Johnny, get over to the sinkhole. Yeah, bring your jug of jizz, dude. It's going to be very popular there. I'm a gobbler. Yes, we know. That's from the report of the hole. gobble up that sinkhole.

So, we'll see how it progresses, but I imagine this is going to be an issue for weeks, if not months. Ali, if you don't think that's more proof that God hates the gays, I mean, what else do you need? I mean, he's flooding right out of West Hollywood. You know what? I actually think he's doing them a favor. We're in a heat wave, and he brought them lots of nice, cool water. Yeah, that's a good point. If anyone could turn that into a fun pool party.

Totally. I mean, Jake should get his tube and float down the river in sunset. Jake, do you have your tube with you still? No, no, no. Those live in Washington State. Oh, we can't possibly get a tube here. Nah.

Nah, man. It needs to be the legit old school black tubes. We have more high protein products coming out. Almost every food and beverage has now been proteinified. We have protein waffles, protein bread, protein tortillas, protein bagels, protein peanut butter, protein pasta, protein ice cream, protein ramen, protein pizza, protein soda, protein donuts. And now thanks to Campbell's, we have protein soup. Five new soups, all of which have 20 grams of protein per can. Klein, as a proud part of the protein craze, will you be buying the new protein soups?

I think I'm out. I think I'm tapping out of the protein. You know, they've even increased the recommended amount that a person should have of protein per day. So I thought it was supposed to be your ideal body weight you have in protein. Yeah, I mean, that's kind of the, like, that's not what's recommended. That's kind of the word on the street. The original recommendation was like 0.33 grams per pound of body weight, which is not very much. Now they're closer to like 0.75 grams per pound of body weight.

But I think pound for pound is what a lot of people are doing now. And they say you need more as you age. More protein. Yeah, more protein. I think it also depends on how active you are. It does highly depend on that. If you don't work out enough and you're just taking in tons of protein, it can just make you gain weight. And it can give you kidney problems, too, because your kidneys are working overtime.

My original plan was just to sit on the couch with one of those giant jugs of protein powder and eat it by the spoonful. Oh, there you go. Yeah. Sounds like a good plan. Eventually, you'll look big, I'm sure. You're making great decisions in your life. I think I am. I think every decision I made is wrong.

This video has been going viral. A man celebrating after his family bought him tickets. Tickets to something he's always wanted to go to. And based on this reaction, what do you think he won tickets to? Or got tickets to? Let's f***ing go! Let's go, baby! That's got to be World Cup finals.

Smash your popcorns, yes! Oh, Smashing Pumpkins? Yeah, he won tickets, got tickets to Smashing Pumpkins. His kids got him the tickets. Oh, my God, I can't wait. Oh, I can't wait. Oh, that's what's up. Oh, that's what's up.

He's crying. He's crying with his kids. Why can't we get some of those winners on our show? We give away tickets to that stuff all the time. Wow, cool. Thanks so much. It was cool because the kids put the tickets inside a ceramic pumpkin and gave the dad a hammer, and he had to smash the pumpkin open.

The fact that he didn't put two and two together at the beginning. Still couldn't figure it out. Who are these for? He's like, is this what I think it is? It's like, yes, it is, dum-dum. Congratulations. We'll put that up on our Instagram, the Klein Alley Show, for your viewing pleasures.

A brand-new hour starts right now. Here we go. This is the world-famous K-Rock. It's going to be a good hour, especially if you are a parent and you have kids that are bothering you because they're home. I mean, this is the time of the summer where they've had the most amount of time since school is over and the most amount of time until school starts again. So you are right now in the solstice of annoyed with your own children, I would imagine. A lot of people are out of ideas by now, but you've sent your children away.

Sent them away for one week. And in that time, my plan for that week was just to have nonstop sex. My wife's plan is to organize all of the rooms. Oh, my God. That's such a great idea. Great time for it. We have totally different plans. She's like, when are you going to be home today?

I said, for the sex. And she goes, no, I need you to move a dresser. I was like, God damn it. It sucks. You got to get ahead. It's your time to get ahead. She's very excited about it. Let's throw out clothes that they're too big for.

And they won't know. I was like, or we could just have sex. She goes, no, it's too hot for that. So, so far, I've not been taking full advantage of having the house to myself. Yeah, but you had sex three times in a 24-hour period. You're doing pretty good. That was a few weeks ago, but I'm pent up again, understandably. He needs his medicine.

He needs his medicine. That's right. I'm on the Steve. Why does everyone need so much medicine? Steve's my guru, Ali, your stepdad. I follow his. Your guru. I follow his.

Jake was in the streets yesterday sniffing pits, some pit stops. We'll get to that in just a moment. And Pat McGann, funny guy, will be coming into the KROQ studios to help you solve any of your parenting problems as you are stuck with kids at home this summer. It can be super annoying, and we'll solve it all this hour on the show, plus less than one hour away from getting you four tickets to Disneyland. So be ready to win those tickets. Remember, if you want to join us, the number 800-520-1067 to interact with the show. Lots to get to, but we kick things off with, what the hell, let's give you Green Day on KROQ.

Summer heat wave means you must make sure you have the right amount of deodorant on so you're not the stinky person where everyone's going around going, because a lot of people smell it and then they have to check their own pits for a second and go, I hope that's not me. nothing worse than smelling it and then realizing it's you and it's never the but it's never that person the person who is stinky never knows they never knows they're stinky they've uh they've come nose blind themselves that's why we started doing the pit stops where jake goes around especially on the hottest days like yesterday and goes up to random people approaches them

says you mind if i sniff your pits now this time we decided let's up the ante for pit stops and jake where's this intro by the way oh here it is right here it's hot and as an avid sweater i know how important it is to wear proper deodorant. So we hit the streets to sniff some pits. This is Pit Stops. So that's Jake as he hits the streets. I thought there was a produced one. There is.

Well, there's this one. Yeah, this one is the other one. He was, this is the better one. Hold on. Oh, my God. No, this, hold on. This is like wigging out. So Jake's segment is obviously not put together great

because Jake was behind it. But the important thing is that he brought with him little deodorants yesterday so if people did not pass the official like smog test pit pit stop he's helping people out he gave them deodorant because in the problem in the past we just addressed there's a problem here but we never solved the problem now we actually figured out a way to solve the problem as well by just handing out deodorant which i think is probably the greatest thing we could do to anyone in southern california so uh jake hit the streets and uh you know things started as they always do uncomfortable and weird uh he starts by chatting with uh this

man by the name of curtis what's your name i'm curtis curtis from where curving yeah curtis it's been a really hot day what have you been doing to stay cool uh usually just try to get into the pool yeah and what have you been doing today you've been playing sports or i just got off work i got kickball right after this oh he's an adult kickball player and uh nothing wrong with that i was an adult kickball player it's case in point right there so uh he uh he knows he's about to go do something active uh jake uh gives him the sniff test oh you're going to kickball yes okay uh well k-rock we think it's important to keep smelling fresh during a heat wave would it be okay if i sniff your pits to see how fresh you're smelling sure yeah yeah all right let's see

oh yeah not bad not bad at all man decent uh this has been a k-rock pit stop can't can't do the noise so uh people uh it's one for one guy smelled decent now jake did you give him the sticker that he passed the pit because he was supposed to wear that around proudly like the i voted sticker people that lets everyone know he doesn't have bo oh yeah i gave everybody stickers are you just saying that or you did no i had no one gave me stickers i don't have stickers we had stickers made for we had deodorant with stickers on him yeah well yeah Yeah, but that was deodorant. I gave people deodorants if they smelled bad,

but no one gave me stickers like you passed the smell test. Oh, so how many then deodorants did you give out to people who smelled bad? Three. Really? I think he said Todd was the smelliest guy. Is that right? Yes. Was Todd the smelliest or was it Nina?

No, Todd was the smelliest. Here's him going up to Todd right now. What's your name? Todd. Todd from where? I'm from, I live in Glendale. Todd, it's been a super hot day today. What have you been doing to stay cool?

Working as much as I can because we have air conditioning. Sure. Driving around a lot because I have air conditioning. I don't know. I'm just cool. Of course, the planes always like to find Jake in the middle of his interview, so here's a plane landing above Jake's head. Well, K-Rock, we think it's important to keep smelling fresh during a heat wave.

Oh, my God. Would it be okay if I sniff your pits to see how fresh your smell is? Yeah. Oh. You can do that. You can do that. All right. You want the side view?

Let's get right in here. I'll just get right in here. Hey, this is a big guy? This is a bigger guy, right? Yeah, he's a little bit bigger guy. Yeah, because he mentions that he's got B-cup breasts, and he's moved to the side. Jake filmed all this, too. But he had, like, a button-up shirt, so he kind of unbuttoned his shirt for me.

Were there pit stains? Side view? Pit stains, Jake? It was, like, a patterned shirt, so I couldn't tell there was pit stains. Side view? That means there is, because people that have pit stains, they kind of know, usually. They distract you with the print. Yeah, they've got to get some paisley.

Get some paisley in these pits. Side view? So it could be better. That's not the best. No, you're smelling under my bee cups. Get in there. So you weren't even in his pits. You were smelling underneath his man boots.

I was getting in there, but then he opened up his shirt, and then he had me get in that way. Oh, God. I don't want to cross over. Oh, fuck. Come on. I've got to get in there? Oh, God damn it. are you a little scruffy

can you shave next time Jesus Christ was that rough for you uh you know what if it wasn't so damn hot that would have been just fine you know what

you might need what might help you is this Klein Alley Show deodorant put that on you know I can never get these things off

oh yeah the little things oh s*** maybe that's why you guys smell so bad you're trying with that little plastic cap you know I've never figured out how to

open a can of deodorant okay it's explained by a stink I'll just buy more Paisley It's melted Am I supposed to drink it? Am I supposed to drink it? That's how hot it was yesterday

The deodorant we were hitting Sweaty people was melting Oh my god So then Jake applies it on this man On the boobs? Wherever you want It always gets real weird It's a weird concept

Let me smell you now Oh wow It's so much better That's right. Just try the Klein Alley Show K-Rock deodorant. Anytime there's a heat wave in L.A., you know where to find me. Wow. It's a great little plug for us.

Todd. This has been a K-Rock pit stop. So there you have it. That's pit stop success, turning it around. Of course, Allie, the original time we met Moist Joyce was during a pit stop, and Jay can't sniff pits without running into Moist Joyce. So here she was yesterday. Moist Joyce.

In the house. How you doing? I'm hot as hell. Yeah, it was. There's our girl. Jake can't do anything in the street without running into Moist Joyce, who's now become a local celebrity. How you doing? I'm hot as hell.

Yeah, it was a pretty warm one today. Yes, it was. How you feeling? A little bit warm in all places. In all the places. Every fold, every flap. Yeah? How moist are you right now?

Oh, you don't want to know. It's very moist. Yeah? Yeah, it's going to start sprouting. Oh. It's growing It's growing fungus It's its own atmosphere

It's sprouting what? It's its own ecosystem Probably little plants or something Alright, we know K-Rock We do pit stops Is it okay if I sniff your pits and see how If you really want to, you can How do you think you're smelling right now?

Oh, I always smell good Yeah? Except for the times you're not Alright, here we go Here we go Not bad Yeah, see You've been way worse

I've never had anybody You've been way worse Alright, it's been K-Rock's Pitch Stops Bye from Moist Choice Watch Kate and Allie I mean, sorry I can only get the name right

Listen to her voice now She is so dry Listen to this I can only think of the Allie part at the moment What is it? Klein and Allie Klein and Allie

She's not Kurt Don't forget to watch climbing alley in the mornings with Jake and Moise Joyce on occasion. On occasion? On K-Rock. On K-Rock. Another successful round of pit stops. Like a lion. A dying lion.

Jake handed out a lot of deodorant yesterday, so we did our part to try to make SoCal smell just a little bit better. Quick break. Back in a moment. If you are a parent and your wits end with your kids, you don't know what to do because here we are in the middle part of the summer where there's still a couple weeks before school starts again, sometimes up to a month. You've already had them for a month.

We'd like to hear what is the most annoying thing your kids are doing this summer, and we're going to help solve those problems with the great Pat McGann. That will be next, K-Rock. K-Rock. Fine, Alicia. Pat McGann is in town at the Lido Theater, Newport Beach. Tonight's show, 7.30.

Tickets, patmcganncomedy.com, thelidotheater.com. Here is just some of what he talks about, and if you're a parent, you will relate. Can't believe you made it out. You're not at a fifth-grade volleyball tournament this weekend, right? That's every weekend now. You have kids. It's like, yeah, we're out of town. We've got to be in Ohio.

We have a game Friday night, 8 o'clock. If we win that, we're playing Saturday morning at 7 a.m. And if we win that one, we're in the championship Sunday night at 9 p.m. So what? You're rooting against your children? Is that what you're telling us? You hope they get their ass kicked the first game so you can have your life back? That is so true. Pat McGann now on KROQ. Good morning, Pat. Hey, what's up? Great to be here, guys. Thanks for being here. I saw you years ago when you first opened for, I think it was Sebastian,

when he was doing a show at the Forum, and you and Sebastian are good buddies, I think. And I said, this guy is so effing funny, we've got to get him into K-Rock. But you live in Chicago, so you're never around here. Yeah, I happen to be in town because I've got a show tonight. And, yeah, Sebastian has been really good to me. You know, I was open to him for years.

He shared his platform with me, met him in Chicago. He's a Chicago guy. And, yeah, man, it's been a good ride. We were just bitching off the air about how much we hate kids. Allie's pregnant again now. I don't think we were all just collectively bitching about kids. But I never could relate with that joke about the kids' sports more than when my kid got in some sort of a soccer tournament on Memorial Day weekend. And I found that it was one game if they lost, but it could have been up to five games if they kept winning.

And you are rooting against your own child. You really are. It's a weird feeling you have. Have you been able to breed out the hobbies for your kids now at this point? You won't be doing that sport. Yeah, right. Hockey's out. Hockey's out.

Yeah, we got rid of that one. That was one he was trying out for at 10 years old. And the trial was, can you come up with $3,000? That was the trial. And then, you know, he's like, hey, I made the team. Like, yeah, I know. I got the fraud alert from Chase. My kid actually just started flag football, which is apparently an option for a four-year-old.

And this is like, yeah, he's decent at it, as decent as any four-year-old would be. but this is the first time where we have one kid that's, like, borderline 6'7", and he can get the flag of any other kid. And I'm like, wow, finally. Late birthday? Yeah, like, we have the team that has a kid that's, like, incredible at this, and we can beat any other team. It's just a really slow, mentally slow 14-year-old.

Yeah, and I'm like, well, usually it's the other team where you're like, who is that kid? Why is he even on this team? Yeah, that's someone's sibling. That guy can't be in the right age bracket. Why does he need some other bracket? Do you actually care though When you're watching your kids in sports

Other than rooting against them Do you find yourself sometimes getting caught up in the action Like you're actually watching a game That you would actually care about Like a professional sports game Oh yeah and I help coach too I've coached basketball So I'm like an assistant coach

And I get lost in that sometimes Yelling at a ref Occasionally They put so many signs up now in LA About reminding everyone that this is just a game. Too many people, I think, were beating up the refs. These are like refs that volunteer, a lot of them, at these things.

A lot of them. I think all of them. There's no one making money. What used to be like one little sign has now become multiple signs on all dugouts. They're like, just a reminder. This is a friendly thing. These refs are volunteering their time. Please don't punch them in the throat.

My daughter was playing some travel stuff this summer, and you go to the game. They charge you $10 to get in, and then they're like, will you work the scoreboard? can you do the book so you're paying to like also volunteer yeah this is the worst time of year to be honest with you like i don't know if you guys are how old are you seven and nine yeah so you're in like the are you like the chauffeur in the summer it's the worst it's like camps like out of the mind like well it's like the parent skills change like now i'm at the age or he's at the age where i as a snack opener that is my greatest skill my ability to open snacks oh yeah then

when they get older, I think it's just your ability to drive them places. Oh, yeah. I'm driving my kids around. And then their friends get in the car. They don't acknowledge you. They don't say hello. They're on their phone. They're staring at their phone. My son's buddy gets in the car the other day. They're 12 years old. His phone

starts ringing. It's like an air raid siren going off in the back seat. It's not like, hey, sorry. Ooh, got a silent set. He answers it like, yellow. Like he's selling jump bonds. working deals in the back. You turn the radio down a little bit,

I gotta take a call. There is a lack of respect that kids don't have. I don't know if it was like this when you grew up, but there was a room in my house I wasn't allowed to go into. I just couldn't go into it. I wasn't allowed to go into it. There were towels I couldn't use. My parents had their own towels. I couldn't use their towels. My kids will come out wearing my clothes.

They'll put on my shirts and stuff and walk in and be like, is this funny on me, Dad? I'm like, that's my shirt. That's my only good shirt. I think as parents, you try to be a friend to your kid, I think that's where we all went wrong. We need to be fear-inducing authoritarians. I would go up to the threshold of my parents' bedroom.

You know? Oh, yeah. You would have to ask to come in. There's like a bouncer there. There's like a rope. You're not on the list. The concept of getting... I don't think I was ever... I'm not kidding, Allie. I don't think I was ever in my parents' bed one time in my entire life. I remember I had a time where I was really afraid.

I can't remember what I was afraid of, but I had a lot of trouble sleeping, but I was so scared to go into my dad's room that I would just go and sleep at the door. I would sleep by his door. And then he would wake up with me sleeping there

like a homeless person. Right. I used to talk about that because now it's like the open concept everywhere, you know? Yeah. Every house is like,

oh, we got to knock these walls down, like open it up. Because you used to be like, get in the other room. Now you can't be like, there's no other room. There's no other room.

It's just an open floor plan. Get 10 feet away from me. Get over there in the corner. Stand over there. By the workspace. If you were a parent right now, you're probably in the thick of it Because as we were saying, we're in that time of year, in the time of summer, where it's the longest time it's been since there was school and the longest time until school starts again right now.

Because, you know, a lot of schools end of August or September. So parents are at their wits' end. So with the question we have for you right now, Pat's going to help us either solve problems or determine whose kid is currently the most annoying based on what you're up to right now. And every kid, you've got to love your own kid, but boy, are they annoying about so many things, right? Well, are we talking about annoying behaviors? Oh, there's so many ways. Are we talking about e-bikers, or are we just talking about the kids who say, bruh? What's the most annoying thing your son is doing right now, Allie, right now?

I'll tell you exactly. My kid and all of the kids in his school are doing this. Booty, booty, booty, booty, booty, booty, booty. They're doing that now? Booty, booty, booty, booty, booty, booty. Patty, you turned on right now? And that is what they do all day and all night. And then at the dinner table, it's a booty, booty, booty, booty, booty.

Kids think stuff is so fun. Can we stop? Oh, yeah. It's not. We'll take your calls, 800-520-1067. We'll solve some problems. If you are a parent, you're in the thick of it right now. Allie and I will bring our problems to Pat as well.

Pat is in town. Pat McGann shows tonight. Lido Theater, Newport Beach, California, 730 show. One of the funniest stand-ups I've seen in a long time. And you will enjoy it. And tickets at thelidotheater.com. Then I'll be back here in October, but we'll talk about that coming up as we solve problems. Parents, we're here for you.

It's the summer, and kids can be annoying. So you can call, you can text, 800-520-1067. We're back with that as we solve some problems after this on KROQ. KROQ, we're a Klein Alley show. Pat McGann in studio now at Newport Beach tonight. A show at the Lido Theater. Get your tickets while you can get them. Here's some more Pat McGann.

My grandparents are both gone. That sucks. That generation, you know what I'm talking about? That generation, like, valued things. Like, we don't value shit anymore. Hell, I threw a frying pan out the other night because I didn't want to scrape it. Like, how much was this? 20 bucks toss it we don't cook ever try and throw something out in front of your grandparents ever

open a newspaper from them what do you do in that rubber band put it in the drawer with the other 2 000 rubber bands is that the last pickle in the jar rinse that out that's good glass you might need that if you go to war what's so funny about that is my mom still she's got a drawer in the kitchen that is filled with the bags that the newspapers came in, the little plastic bags. Whoa, really? And I'm like, what are you possibly saving all these bags for? She must have thousands of them, and I can't possibly figure out what her game plan, like

what the, I know for a while when we had a dog, she would use it to pick up the dog's poop. We haven't had a dog in years in that house, and she still has these bags, so many of them. But you're so right, Pat, is people would just keep things just in case, because you never knew what was going to happen. You wear them as footies over your, you know, if there's a flood, you got to put them on. They're using them right now in West Hollywood, aren't they? Yeah.

That's a good local reference right there. That guy pays attention. And then if for some reason they didn't have a thing, that was the best. My mom would be like, in a situation, she'd be like, oh, man, I shouldn't have thrown it. Like two years ago, I threw out. Wow, she remembers?

Yeah, I can't believe I threw out that jaw because I could have used it. It would have been great. Yeah, like a shoebox got thrown out. Just like, oh, wait, this would have been the time for that. They think about that forever. A lot of people are saying that their kids are at peak annoying right now. So there's some problems on the text line coming through, 800-520-1067.

Pat has three kids, so he can help you solve these problems. We'll start with this. 714 said, my kid will never eat what they order at a restaurant, ever. They order it, never eat it. Just never eat it. Never eat it. Now, I know that... Well, sometimes it looks different than what they imagined in their brain.

And then when it arrives, the pasta is butterfly-shaped when they had tubes in their brain. Right. So they can't eat that. Kids can't shake that now. Did you hold them down and force them to eat it because they ordered it? I mean, if they're ordering it, I don't know what my policy would be. My kids are just, like, picky. Every kid is picky.

Do you give in to the pickiness, though? Or do you have to put your foot down? Sometimes I do because it feels like it's just easier. But then you're making three dinners. You're like a short-order cook. Now they start making requests because they know. They were on a strict quesadilla-only diet for years. And that was a great diet because I liked it.

Easy to make, can't screw it up. And then all of a sudden, one day, order a case of these. They go, what are you doing? We hate these. I go, you hate these? This is all we've had for three years. And that's the other thing, is you either go from extreme love to extreme hate. There's no middle ground whatsoever with food.

Right there. What is a way to keep a kid busy for the next two weeks without spending any money? Ooh, that's a tough one. I mean, you ruin their brains, but you just leave them alone with the screens, which is the worst. Yeah, I know. That's another thing, too. How about they don't charge the screens? You ever run into that issue?

which, I mean, that's probably a good thing, but every time I call my kids, it's like, I'm at 1%. They're always at 1%. You're like, charger, stop. It's like, I'm at 1%. Every one of my chargers at home is pretty much broken now because when an iPad gets down low, and my kids have like OCD because if they're at 90%,

she's like, I don't know, could die in the middle of something I'm doing. Oh, really? So she'll rip, just rip. No, there's no, and I said, this is my charger. You don't, so you stay out of my room. This is my charger. They have no respect for it at all.

Yeah, I can't find my charger. They're always tethered to a wall. My kids are sitting. Yeah, they're sitting by the plug. They look like they're stranded at LAX. Like, did you miss your flight? Kelly on KROQ with the great Pat McGann. What's up, Kelly?

Hey, guys. Good morning. How's it going? Good morning. Good. So, yeah, my kid is super gross. His favorite thing to do is swim underwater and come up and, like, just straight up blow his nose and let the boogers hang out or float off in the pool.

And the more mad I get about it, like, the funnier he thinks it is. I would love to ban this kid from the pool, but then he won't leave me alone. And it's tough because the pool is kind of like that's kind of dangerous babysitter that like they'll keep him busy for a while, but also could kill him, you know? But like, you know, you for the most part. But it's such a great thing to be like, just go in the pool for two hours. Right. I just love the way people talk about their kids now, too. Go ahead, Kelly.

Yeah, my kid sucks. Yeah. My kid is disgusting. I think it's important to have that sort of. I think, like, the reason we have Instagram is to post pictures of them looking great and saying, like, oh, I'm so proud. I love my child. That's the greatest job I ever had as being a, like, you've had some jobs before. I promise you you're not saying the greatest job you ever had as being a dad, right?

Oh, yeah. Although I like being a parent now that I'm divorced because I have my time off. I'm like a fireman. Oh, that is nice. Yeah, you're part-time. I have to, like, you know, clarify with my kids, though, because there's some confusion. Like, hey, when I don't have you, that's dad's weekend. All right.

Don't call me. They call me for advice when I don't have any. I don't want you to hit me up or anything. 909 says, I'm having a problem because at this point in the summer, my kid says he's bored. The second one activity ends. Oh, my God. That's the other thing. It goes to extreme boredom.

You drop him at camps. You don't even look what the camp is for. You look for the M-F. That's the camp you want. You don't want to do the TTH or MWF. You want the M through F. That means Monday to Friday. So you can drop off this MF.

Yeah, it's so funny you say that. I was picking a camp based on how long the day was. I didn't even care what the thing, some of them were like 9 to noon. I'm like, that does nothing for me. Three hours. Right, so I go, well, where's one of the, there's one that was like 6 a.m. drop off, pick up as late as 6 p.m.

I'm like, you're going to that camp. And you don't really care about the qualifications of the counselor. No. What's this, bomb making? Yeah, alright. Okay, at least it goes until 6 p.m. It's got late drop off, so you can go ahead and do that one. Dude, I saw a summer camp taking place at a park and there were these two guys that were in

charge of the kids and they didn't know what the hell they were doing there was a kid who fell and hurt her knee and they were like uh i guess we're just gonna drizzle some of your bottled water on your knee and keep running go ahead i was like damn but nobody cares they're being occupied 714 is pregnant with their first child right now and says guys you're freaking me the f out uh well that happens sometimes they're great you love them and then and then there's all these annoyances yeah 909 said the most annoying thing about their kids is that they hate each other the kids fight and annoy each other and then we separate them and we have to make each other apologize

and mediate all their fights and then the whole cycle starts all over again. And that'll never change, right? Your kids are constantly fighting? Yeah, I mean, that's just, that was parenting right there, that last one. Right. That's what it is. You gotta do that. Pat is here and at the Lido Theater now,

tonight, Newport Beach, so go get tickets at patmcganncomedy.com or thelidotheater.com you will not be disappointed. Then, back in California, but that's all the way up in Santa Cruz and Napa in October, We'll put all the dates up on our Instagram. And the special, which, by the way, was produced by our buddy, Sebastian Maniscalco, that is up on the, that's when's mom going to be home.

And that is, where is that? Where was that? On Hulu? It's on Hulu now, yeah. Nice. So, worth checking out as well. Pat, thanks for stopping by, man. Good to see you.

Thanks for being here. Thanks for saving a lot of problems. I like this guy. Our audience is very mean, and they said they like you, and now they're giving us advice for summer camp. Someone said they found a 12-hour camp alley. Oh, man. But it's a sweatshop.

They have to build wallets. Great. We're in. So back after this quick break, more KROQ next. KROQ, Kline Alley Show. You can listen to the show a little bit longer. Get yourself Disneyland tickets. But listen carefully because we have another cautionary tale on the GOAT line.

Good morning, guys. I just wanted to say that yesterday I made the mistake of listening to the podcast while I was at the gym. And when you guys were making the comments about Klein's neck, I almost dropped a dumbbell on my head. Yeah. Well, thanks, Klein. You're welcome. Your neck has officially become a menace to society. Great.

And, yeah, almost caused me bodily injury. All right, redo it. If you hurt yourself by listening to the show, by laughing, we also said if you accidentally pee yourself while listening to the show, we will cover the cost of cleaning your pants. I don't know if we have a rule in place. I know we said if you drive through a pothole while listening to the show, we'll repair your tires.

We've done a lot of things to try to make it right with our listeners, but if you drop a dumbbell on yourself while laughing at them making fun of my fat neck, There's nothing we can do for you. And how ironic. How ironic is that? Because that's the reason I got this fat neck, because I decided to lift the weight every once in a while. Could be why you have a fat tongue, too.

Your news will start right now, and then your Disneyland ticket's immediately following this. Grab your Adderall. It's time for ADD News. Well, you can add water main leak to your list of work excuses, especially if you live in or near West Hollywood. A huge water main busted up just before 4 a.m. this morning. All the streets near Sunset and Holloway have been flooded.

There are, if you look at the footage, it's fun to look at. There are reports of people being swept away by the flooding, though I think realistically everyone's just fine. They were able to finally turn off the water. And next, we'll be assessing and repairing the damage, which includes a giant sinkhole on Sunset. But if you just listen to the mayor of West Hollywood, he sounds kind of excited by all this. Good morning. Welcome to the city of West Hollywood. I'm John Heilman. I'm the mayor, and I'm joined by our vice mayor, Danny Hang. Danny Hang. As Mayor Bass said, we had a major leak and a sinkhole.

He sounds like he's just like, whoa, sinkhole exciting. And I want to thank our partners in L.A. and DWP for responding so quickly. He's like, thanks, everyone. Welcome to West Hollywood. We've got a sinkhole, ladies and gentlemen. My favorite headline so far is Gazy River. i think that it's going to take a while to fix all this but i don't think west hollywood will be phased everyone will still go out and get wasted they will rebuild yeah i have a feeling if a city can thrive through it it you know it's definitely west hollywood everyone remembers the moment that you got the news you passed the written test on your driver's license you're

that much closer to getting an actual license but 11 000 people in california are now having to retake their written exam because the dmv says a cheating scandal was uncovered but they won't really explain the details of it they just said they found testing anomalies during a review of some of the written exams and they said everybody that they've sent a letter to has to retake and pass the written exam exam within 30 days or their license will be revoked and they didn't say specifically what the cheating methods were but they did say it wasn't ai and i know they take you to a little area with like partitions kind of like voting where you have like a little uh you know those little blinders and then you can't have your phone and stuff but i don't know how

supervised that is anymore i wonder if they receive like i remember at school when there used to be cheating issues it was because like multiple people had the same exact wrong answer right and it was clear that like the odds of you know everyone because at least in school there was one kid that we knew always would get perfect scores and so there was someone that there was a whole copying system so it's like the same right and wrong yes yes like the exact same then they start looking and going like why is everyone putting d for this one and then they start looking into it i would imagine the other thing that people do um is they send someone else in to try to take the test for you that was a big scam that was going on for a while but how would

they know how would they be able to catch that they don't know what you look like right especially because you don't have a driver's license. You don't have a driver's license yet. I have nothing to show you what I look like. Here's a sample question for you. When a railroad crossing is not controlled, what is the speed limit if you are within 100 feet of the railroad?

False. 10. 10, 15, or 25. Give me this again. I'm supposed to know this? If I'm doing what by a railroad? I don't even think I understand the question. Say it again.

This is a real question for the... I wonder how many of these I could actually get right. This is the practice test. All right, go ahead. This is one practice test. If I'm getting to a railroad, How fast am I allowed to go over the tracks? When a railroad crossing is not controlled, what the hell does that mean?

I mean, I think that means when it's up. It means free range. When it's up. It means the bars aren't down yet. Yeah, yeah. It means it's wild. Yeah, you've got to race quickly to get through it. If you see a railroad track in the wild, what is the speed limit when you are within 100 feet?

Oh, as fast as possible because you don't want to get stuck behind it. In both directions. Yeah, those things can come down and then you're stuck watching the little people come by and wave at you. Guys, there's three answers. What do I think? All of them. 10, 15, or 25? B.

B. 10 miles. You're just going to pick B? When I didn't know, I always go in the middle. That's kind of my strategy. I think it's 15. Damn it. That was B.

See, I would have chosen the slowest because I'm like, well, that's got to be the safest. That's how they try to get you. See, I don't actually try to think about what's the right answer. I just try to think about how they're trying to get me. Yeah. I'm like, what are they getting at here? It is like the SATs where you're just trying to figure out what's the answer they're looking for. I don't know the answer.

Give me a real one. That one's BS. Give me a driving one. Let's see if I know a driving one. because I used to get tripped up on a lot of those. The ones about... Which of the following is the proper procedure for parallel parking?

Drive forward into the space without stopping. Stop next to the vehicle behind the open space and drive forward into the space. This is a stupid question. Stop next to the vehicle in front of the open space and back into the space. I mean, come on. Look for the valet first.

It's the first option. It's L.A. Your written answer is it's L.A.? This isn't... They're going to say you pull up next to the vehicle in front, and then you kind of back into it. That's what I think, too, right? Because that's a traditional parallel park. But depending on some of the spots, if you've got space, you can pull a nose first.

And you have to stop next to the vehicle in front of the open space. All right, fine. But that gives a lot of people anxiety. And if you're on Ventura, you can't do that. It's too scary. That's way too many roads. Because once you get to the car in front of you, they're right on your ass waiting. You've got to stop first, put your blinker on, then pull up.

I know, and then that person has to try and back up so they can give you space to get in. I mean, there's all these variables. The system's flawed. What they should do is everyone gets a license, and then you just, as you go around and start driving like an a-hole, we just start removing, just start taking people's licenses away. What about this one, Klein? Who can legally park next to the blue painted curb? It's a good review for you.

Well, obviously handicapped, but also if you got to take a crap and it's emergency, you should get it temporarily. You're right. You're right. You don't have to retake your test. Congratulations. Thank you. There's a new perk that you can get on United flights.

And this is has a lot of people talking because I know that business class or first class, like there's a lot of perks, extra leg room that you can pay for. But they have a new option now for economy plus where you can buy a seat with no neighbor in the middle. So you can essentially buy your seat and ensure that the middle seat will not be taken so that you can use that space for a shared table, a little more elbow space. and it's only going to be offered in one row of the plane. So there's only going to be one. Yeah, you can't just buy a bunch of those because then eventually there's just too many empty seats. But that would make sense if you're traveling, let's say,

with, you know, husband, wife, girlfriend, boyfriend, whatever. Or a kid. Well, you'd have to buy the kid a seat anyway. No, but if it's like you and a kid and you want to make, you have like a bonus seat so that they can lay, you know, all the stuff, all the crap that you're going to bring, the coloring books. It makes sense for two people traveling.

That's the only thing it would make sense for, right? One person traveling, you'd have to hit up the other person. If I were to buy, if I'm a window and I'm going to buy the middle for myself as well, you better believe when I get on the plane, I'm going to say to whoever the stranger is in the aisle, hey, cough up some money if you want to take advantage of this extra space I bought us. What? Yeah, because I'm saying if you are buying, you can buy two seats, right? You can't buy a whole row.

You can buy two seats. You're going to buy two seats, yeah. Or you can be one person and then buy this and just make sure there's no one next to you. But then someone, whoever's in the aisle, is going to benefit from that extra seat as well. No one wants someone in the middle. So you want money from that person as well? Of course. I'm going to tell them that. And you're going to shake them down for them when they get there?

Yeah, if you want to enjoy this extra space. Hey, see this? This is because of me. Or else I'm going to sit in the middle right on top of them. I mean, it was such a nice bonus during the Southwest days. It was nice. To have an empty middle. It was like, oh, I feel like a king. One of the few great feelings you get in the world is when they announce,

we're closing the boarding door. And you kind of start looking down. You do the math. There's three people there coming. And you're like, where should I put my drink? Here or here? I can put it here. Oh, that's great.

Put my iPad there. Another great feeling is winning tickets to Disneyland. And we give you that feeling right now. If you're the 20th caller, 800-520-1067. Let's go. This is the world famous K-Rock. Now, here's a question from the written test for you. How fast should you be driving on the 101 if you're self-pleasuring?

A minimum of 85. That is not right For maximum climax We should all lose our license That should be the segment Why should we all lose our license And yours is because you have been You're a serial masturbator on the 101

Yours is because you don't follow really any Parking guidelines Most of the rules I think are just They're more suggestions than rules You know somebody on the text line said That the driver's license scandal is happening Because of meta glasses Oh really?

People are wearing metaglasses to the written test, and the DMV hasn't caught up to it yet, which makes a lot of sense. That is genius. 8208 said, next, you guys should try and pass a U.S. citizenship test. See if you can pass any of those. I think those are very difficult. I will do that on the air, but the deal is if whoever has the lowest score has to immediately move to Canada. You can't move to Mexico? No.

The food is so much better there. You have to go to Canada. Canada, it's so cold. It's so much more annoying. This hour on the show, we have lots to get to. Of course, kick things off by giving you tickets to Disneyland. We'll do that. Generation Wars, bragging rights for you and your entire generation.

Returns to K-Rock and so much more if you're new to the show. Hi, what's up? I'm Klein. There's Ali. That is Jake the Nerd over there. DJ Omar Khan. Hello. And taking them calls in the chicken coop in the back is producer Vanessa and postmaster Johnny. And we say good morning right now to our 20th caller, which puts us in Northridge, California.

Is this Natalia? No way! No way! Yes! Yes! Let's go! Woo! Natalia, that's exactly the expression we were hoping for. It's not one of those people that goes, yeah, okay, I guess I'll take them. So thank you for that, and enjoy your four tickets to Disneyland. Sweet divots! Sweet divots to you, yes. I thought she said, sweet dammit!

All right, well, we'll take whatever you say. Hold on one second and enjoy Disneyland, all right? Thank you, thank you, thank you. Thanks for starting your day with us on KROQ. You will get more of those tickets coming up today at noon, then again at 3 and 6, and we'll have another four-pack for you tomorrow morning at this exact time.

All right, and now we can get back to the show we have in store for you this hour. It will be a decent one, we believe. We believe. We believe. We don't know. We've only been wrong some of the times. It's K-Rock with Klein Alley Show.

Good morning, and welcome to your prequent. Oh, man, you're going to piss off Jake with this take. Alley, it's an unpopular opinion. I know it is. We've had a few unpopular opinions before. We've never been concerned with being popular because we've tried. It's just too difficult. I've tried my whole life.

I've given up. We've accepted the fact that's just not for us. So having an unpopular opinion is really just an opinion at this point. Well, I have been of this opinion for a while. And then I kind of flip-flopped because I'm like, you know what? I should like this. Everyone likes this. And then I realized yesterday it's okay just not to like it.

And I know this is going to be unpopular. And I know everybody loves them. And they even say that it's going to help you live longer. I don't like naps. What? I don't think that they're, I think they're a waste of time. No, you're kind of doing it wrong. Yeah.

This is Jake's favorite, probably his favorite time of the day. Well, he takes a full sleep. Yeah, he sleeps. It's definitely not a nap. But he calls it a nap and he says, don't bother me, I'm napping. And we're like, Jake, can you get the podcast up? He's like, not now, I'm napping. Yeah, and if we need anything from Jake, we have to get to him before like 1 or 2 p.m.

Because otherwise he's out of commission. And sometimes until 8 p.m. because he doesn't set an alarm. So he just sleeps until he wakes up. Think about it. How many times do you nap where you say, I am totally refreshed, I feel great, that was a great decision? Every single time that I nap, and it's under an hour, and I actually fall asleep. Absolutely, it's the best. Do you sleep for over an hour?

I don't sleep over an hour. Usually, it's less than that, but I always feel groggy. Really? I always feel like my body wishes that the sleep was longer. I feel like I wasted my time. There's other stuff that I could have done with that part of my day. Omar's point, I believe, is are these premeditated or because premeditated is a different thing than just I fell asleep sitting somewhere. I was so tired and then I woke up and now I'm all.

Yeah, that doesn't happen to me. I don't fall asleep. So you get into a bed. You do a whole thing. You plan on it. Yeah. I can't just fall asleep on the couch. Omar, when you nap, do you go you just keep your regular day clothes on like like.

Yeah. Oh, when I when I if I ever get a nap in, it's on my regular clothes because it's not planned. It's just like, you know, I crashed out or whatever, you know? Right. So you're fully clothed on like a couch or a chair? On a couch. Yeah. I'm like Omar.

Usually a couch. I don't fully commit to the, like Jake puts on like pajamas for his nap. I put on sleeping shorts, not pajamas. Well, whatever. It's the same. Sleeping shorts is just as baby. You're a baby. You're putting on, you're putting on.

I don't do that. I'm a man. I put on a onesie. Yeah. I take my pants off. Ugh. So I can Donald Duck it in bed. But I think that that's the whole thing is you let yourself get to that next level.

You don't want to go to full deep level. You want to stay in nap level. Yeah, but I'm so tired. I can't not go into a deep level. I wake up not knowing where I am. I also, I don't know about you, but weird nap dreams happen. Yeah, those are weird. Nap dreams are strange and disorienting.

And then I don't know if it's night or day. I don't remember what day it is or what else I have going on. And then I'm like, I still need to work and do stuff and I can't. Do you set an alarm? Sometimes, yeah. Because I don't want to sleep longer. You get to that weird place. It only happens during naps where you're in that weird state of sleep paralysis where you're fighting between being awake and being asleep.

And then you end up in this weird. But I think, Omar, if you do it the right way, you can ideally go, that only took 30 minutes or 43 minutes, and I feel like, great, I'm ready to conquer the world. Do you? You do every time? No, I have never planned a nap. I've never said I'm going to nap. I have sat down to eat at a table and woken up an hour later at the table. That's happened a few times.

Was it like your face in the food or something? Most of your naps are accidental. Almost all. One time in my car. I was just sitting in the car. We got home. I was sitting in the car, and I said, I'm so tired. I said that to myself, and the next thing I knew, I woke up later really sweaty.

I was almost one of those died-in-the-car guys. You were a baby in a hot car. I was almost a baby in a hot car seat in the front seat. How sad would that have been? That would have been the end of me. You just died that way? Yeah, in the car. Oh, man, nobody saved you.

No, but luckily I sweated myself awake. 323 said I nap in my car before I go home. I nap for 20 minutes so that I don't fall asleep behind the wheel. And when I wake up, I feel great and I drive home. Also, people talk about that whole buffer. Let's say you work all day and then you've got to go home and deal with the family. It's like you've got to create that little buffer for yourself. Nice 20-minute nap.

I don't know. There is a sweet spot for the nap. 323 said they never nap longer than 30 minutes because I wake up grumpy. I limit it to 20, 20 minutes only. 20 is almost like what's the point, though? That's what I think. and then it's a it's a power nap it gives you power no but ali i'm thinking you're just way too tired for life and that's why you wake up i think i'm too tired for this i don't think i can

nap because i'm too tired my body's going please please give me more and the other problem is if i have a 20 minute time clock if it takes me five minutes or 10 minutes to fall asleep then what i bet i'm overthinking going why haven't i fallen asleep yet if i haven't then you wake up all like gross and disgusting and mad yes i mean i'm grumpy anyway well yeah i'm grumpy most of the time gross gross too and gross and sweaty but you're growing a life inside of you so if anyone has the jake has no excuse for the long naps he takes but as omar said those are not really naps he's just breaking up his sleep into two different you know sleep sleep whatever times but for the average person 20 minutes that seems way too short my wife was telling me you need to prioritize sleep more you

need to be sleeping because your body is working harder than it normally is. That's one of those BS things that everyone says. You go, when do I have time to do that? I'm going to sleep more, sleep more, sleep more, but you got to work more, work more, work more, earn more, earn more. And I feel like you give into it. You give into the tired. If you're really that tired, you got to snap

yourself out of it. Like Omar, for a while you were just working out when you were tired and that would just like, it would go back into these caveman day of like, I can't sleep, I got to keep going. And then it kind of catapults you into the rest of your day. It's way better than a nap. I do a thing called masturbating oh and what i do is when i feel like i'm about to fall asleep i will do that

masturbate and then i will definitely fall asleep okay what's the point thank you for telling me so why don't you try that all right all right we got that glad we talked about this quick break we're back with more show next four generations battling it out over the airwaves of k-rock right now only one generation will be the best and of course you may think that you grew up in the best generation or you're jealous because you're like oh Gen Xers took all the money and the jobs and now we're left with scraps or you're a boomer and you don't care anymore

because you think that Gen Z is ruining everything for everyone. So everyone's got animosity towards the other generations and we decide to let you battle it out over the airwaves of K-Rock. Once and for all, bragging rights and in this particular case tickets to see Evanescence, a band that spans many generations. It's time for

Generation Wars. Are we busting or what? You kids and your TikToks. Gen Zers blazing. This is the Generation Wars. Representing the generation known as the Boomer. This guy loves rock and roll. They don't make them like that anymore.

His name is Gary. Of course it is. Good morning, Gary, and welcome to KROQ. Good morning. If you know the answer to the questions, please yell out, boomer. Wait for Allie to call on you before you answer, and let's go ahead and bring in some bragging rights for all the boomers out there. As we say good morning to your competition, representing the Gen Xers. She has a metal lunchbox collection.

Cool. And you are a Gen Xer for sure if you ran the risk of getting tetanus every time you ate your lunch. This is Lynn. Good morning, Lynn, and welcome to Generation Wars. Good morning, everybody. Once again, if you know the answer, you yell out Gen X. Don't be shy. Wait for Ali to call on you, though. A lot of people get confused, and they yell out the answer.

Don't yell out the answer. Yell out your generation. Wait until you're called on. And once we've called on you, everyone else shut up. That's right. Rules is rules around here. We say good morning now to our millennial, born in 1983. This guy's a fan of Transformers.

That's right, Ali. Long before there was transgenders, there was Transformers. And that's how it was written here. And we say good morning now. That's how it's written in the call screen. That's right. Vanessa wrote that if you've got a problem. I didn't.

It's all right, Vanessa. Frank, good morning. Good morning, guys. How's it going? Good to have you on with us. If you know the answer, please yell out millennial. Millennials all over the place are rooting for you to win this. And finally, we say good morning to Auntie.

Auntie is born. I can't be right. She's a Gen Z-er. Born in 2002. What? Good morning. Is this auntie? It's Amity.

All right, I'll go with that. Close enough. Is that how it was written, Vanessa? I asked her to spell it for me. Amity. All right, we start the game right now, guys. Then you put auntie? That's what you did.

Hands on your buzzers. Let's go. Your round begins right now with question number one in Generation Wars. What was the nickname of Ted Kaczynski? Oh my gosh Gen X The Green River Killer No

That's such a less known serial killer Boomer The Bomber The what? The Bomber Can't accept that Gen X You've already gone on this one

You can't go again Millennial Yes, Millennial. The Unabomber. That is the one. There we go. On the board, the Unabomber. Wow, this is going to be a rough round right now.

We move on to your next question. Legendary comic strip. Who was Calvin's best friend? Who's next? Boomer. Hobbs is correct. Calvin and Hobbs as we move on in Generation Wars. What was the brand name of the iconic blue insulated cooler that Baby Brute...

Gen X. Yes, Gen X. Igloo. Igloo is correct. I still have one of those. Yeah, they're indestructible. You have one, watch. You have it forever.

Oh, they last forever. We move on to your next question in Generation Wars. What does the 2026 slang term Sigma mean or represent? Sigma? Boomer. Go ahead, Boomer. Healthcare. No, not healthcare.

That's Sigma. Not Gen Z. Thank you. It's all about healthcare for the boomers. Sigma, Sigma with an M. Gen Z, yeah, Gen Z. Yes, Gen Z. Lone Wolf, Independent.

Yeah, yeah. Cool, Alpha Energy, Lone Wolf, I will accept that. That is a correct answer for Sigma. You are on the board. Everyone's got a point. And we move on to your next question. Where was Tom, your first friend? Gen X.

Millennium. Gen X. Myspace. That is correct. Next question. Bill Clinton famously played the sax on what TV show? Gen X. Gen X.

The Simpsons. No. Wait, say that again? That's a good guess, though. Did that happen? You know what? Hold on. I feel like he must have.

Gen Z. Yes, Gen Z. Arsenio Hall that is the correct answer that was the one that was the big deal I think they did animate him playing the sax on the Simpsons but Arsenio Hall was technically

the famous the answer I have here you know what hold on we have to go to the judges on this one hey give a half a point to Gen X but the full point goes to the Gen Z who said the Arsenio Hall show for a follow up point what was the official

call or rallying cry of the Arsenio Hall show? Millennial. Yes, Millennial. That is correct. Man, times used to be a lot more fun. And a lot simpler. And we go to your next question now. What is the name of someone that

is a big fan or follower of Jimmy Buffett? What are they known as? Gen X. Yes, Gen X. Parrothead. That is correct, Gen X. Parrotheads. We move on. Allie, what's the score currently? Well, it seems that Gen X is in the lead with three and a half points.

Okay. And then we have Millennial and Gen Z tied in second place with two points. Boomer has one point. What was the name of the white-haired, loyal barista working at the Central Perk on the hit sitcom Friends? Gen Z. That's Gen Z. Gunther. That is correct.

Gen Z gets a point. And we move on to your next question now. In the magazine known as Mad Magazine, who was Spy fighting? Spy versus who? Boomer. Millennium Boomer. Boomer. Spy versus Spy.

Spy versus Spy is the correct answer. I knew Boomer would come through with that one. Nice, Boomer. Rebounded from that Medicare answer you gave us a moment ago. And we go on, Allie. Only a handful of questions left. It's getting a lot tighter right now. What does it mean to be mewing?

What does it mean to be mooing or mewing? You're making that up. Mooing or mewing? Mewing would be the proper pronunciation of that. Mewing. Mewing is pressing the tongue to the roof of your mouth to define your jawline Often used to indicate staying silent or potentially you could be doing that for maxing your photos If you want to face max, you could be doing some mewing as well

We don't know anything about that But that is a Gen Z question that is completely lost on all the other generations And we move on to this next question right now It's Generation Wars What classic icy summer treat came in a plastic sleeve that you had to snip with scissors? Gen X. Gen X. Otter Pops.

I would have accepted Otter Pops. I would have also accepted Flavor Ice. Both would have been accepted. And you continue with your dominance with only a few questions left. Allie, what's the score right now? Gen X has four and a half points. Gen Z has three. Millennial, two.

And Boomer, two. What iconic fast food mascot? introduced in the early 80s, went on to start a popular wave-making advertising campaign that featured a mysterious, heavily guarded ingredient. What was that?

What iconic... That was a crazy question. It was a crazy question, indeed. Iconic fast food mascot introduced in the early 80s, went on to start a popular wave-making advertising campaign that featured a mysterious, heavily guarded ingredient.

Wavemaking? You'll know when you hear the answer. Well, that's not helpful. I'll know when I hear the answer. Matt, tonight, the Crescent Moon, who is the moonhead playing the piano in the McDonald's commercials. No one gets the point. That's okay. And we move on.

This one is, which beverage popularized itself by telling the world that they'd like to teach the world to sing in perfect harmony? Boomer. Boomer. Okay. That is correct. Boomer, Allie, two questions left. What's the score right now? So Gen X has four and a half points still.

Then you got Gen Z and Boomer tied in second place with three points. It's anyone's game. What Disney movie had Hayley and Annie meet at a place called Camp Walden? Millennial. Yes, Millennial. Parent's Trap. That is correct, Millennial. And that was a millennial question, technically.

Allie, this is the final question now. Here we go. Here we go. What outdoor organization popularized survival, not tying, and camping with notable ranks like Life and Eagle? Gen X. Gen X. Boy Scouts. Boy Scouts of America, BSA.

Well, it ended the way it started. Wow. Gen X proving that that generation knows a lot. Jake is so happy right now. He's standing up and clapping for you. Sorry, Frank, millennial. Sorry, boomer. Everybody pulled their weight, though.

Yeah, everyone did decent. Everyone was on the board. And in honor of your big victory, we have tickets for you to go see Evanescence at the Kia Forum this Saturday. Congratulations, Lynn. Yay. And also, any song you'd like to hear that you believe would represent your generation, and I will play it right now on KROQ. What song would you like to hear?

Let's do Brass Monkey. Brass Monkey is a great song, but I have the killers queued up and ready to go, so that's what we're going to do. And congratulations, and thank you for playing, Jen Wurst. Next week, another chance for you to get some bragging rights for your entire generation in a real battle. 50 years in the making on KROQ.

KROQ, we're the Klein Alley Show. Hey, guys. We did it. I just want to say, hate when you're off the air. That sucks. But I'm catching up on the podcast from last week, and I have to say one of my favorite bits is after Generation War is when Clyde asks whoever the winner is what song they want to hear,

and then he just plays whatever's queued up next anyway. That is, I laugh literally every single time. Anyways, keep doing what you guys are doing. I hope you're back on air tomorrow. Yeah, okay, bye. Yeah, we're here live now, but yeah, it's too hard to find the songs people want. I don't know. There's certain DJs that are good at that.

You want to hear a song? Get it on the air right now. Yeah. I can't do that. I'm bad at spelling. I'm dyslexic. You're bad at typing, too. You're a slow typer.

I do want to thank one of our listeners who yesterday, after I was talking about going to Vegas this weekend to pull my all-nighter, suggested that I rearrange my plan so that I'm there for the World Cup Finals because I do like gambling and I do feel like being there for an event like that. They'll have a lot of gambling going on. To be at a Vegas sports book could actually make that even more exciting. So, wait, you were going to go on Friday? I was going to leave and drive Friday.

Now are you going to drive Saturday or are you staying the whole weekend? I decided I'm just going to stay the weekend. Oh, no. No, no, no. No, I know. No, that's too long. I know. I've realized that.

You're going to leave before the game. I'm going to predict it now. Place my bet. My least favorite time to be in Vegas usually is anytime I decide I don't want to be rushed to leave early Sunday morning. So I say, I'll just do something later. That window of waiting to leave Vegas feels like an eternity. It is a weird void where you're like, I don't want to be here anymore. But the only thing I can do is spend more money.

But I, so I got a hotel and I was excited because I got a good rate. Because I guess last weekend things were crazy at hotels because the fight was in Vegas this weekend. There's not much going on minus the finals, but I got a hotel. And then I was feeling really good about the rate until they said, because they're very, Vegas, lo and behold, is a little sneaky. you know to get your money yeah and uh of course as as you know we've all been banged out by the quote resort fees before and this resort fee was stupid because this resort fee includes quote things that i will never do never use like the business center it's for the amenities and stuff right well so at least if you're going to put stuff on there at least put stuff that i know i

will use even if it's already included because the answer is you're right i'm allowed to send faxes from the business center, as many as I choose, as many as I want, they know I'm not going to do that. I'm also allowed to make long distance calls to Alaska. Oh. And Hawaii. Do you know anyone in Alaska? Nope.

Oh, you do now. I can do unlimited from the phone in the room, which no one's probably picked up in years. I don't even think you pick up that phone to order room service anymore. No, you scan a QR code, you order from your phone. You don't do, you don't pick up the phone. So for $55 a night, which... Oh, that's the resort fee. $55 a night, that's the fee.

I can go to the business center. I can use the gym at the hotel. Which you probably will. But any hotel you can use a gym at. If you're staying at the hotel, there's not usually a fee for that. And I'm not going to use the gym in Vegas, no way. The pool? That's not part of the resort fee.

That's my point. They should at least say things you could actually do. Like, oh, it's a blackjack table seat fee. All right, great. I'll sit at the black. At least I want to feel like I'm getting something for it. Because I want to say to them, these things you're telling me I can use for $55 a night, which I'm forced to pay, include a business center, which I'll never go into, a gym, which I'll never go into, calling people in Hawaii and Alaska, which I will not be doing. You should.

Oh, maybe I should. You should just call Hawaii and Alaska. Non-stop. All night. All weekend. When I check out. This hurts rental car and Honolulu. This guy made 87 phone calls to Hawaii and Alaska because he could.

Yeah, and they can't do anything. At least you paid for a reason. I don't know anyone there, but if anyone has any people they know in Hawaii or Alaska, give me their number. I'm going to call them because I feel like I've got to get my $55 worth. You should call that banana bread company. Oh, man, Annie Sandy's Banana Bread? It's the one recommendation Klein gave me. Yeah.

I used to have the banana bread, and that one banana bread's down. I just want to call and talk and see what she's... I'm not here to get any banana bread. I'm in Vegas. I'm just wanting to say hi. Don't you think... You can dispute those, you know. What do you mean you can dispute them?

You can dispute the resort fees with your credit card company. You can't dispute them. They said you have to pay it. They said, I paid up front for the room, and then they said... No, no, but she's saying you go through the credit card company. Which, that's interesting. You've succeeded? I've succeeded before.

I don't know if now it's different, but I remember when they first started doing those resort fees, I would call and say, I did not agree to this resort fee, and they would give it back to me. The first person. Yes, because I didn't have a choice, and I didn't take advantage of those perks, so I didn't agree to pay money for this resort fee. I agreed on a certain rate, and that's what I should be paying. I guess my point is just make the room $55 more expensive.

Yeah, well, and that's what the sales tax and all that stuff that they're doing with tickets, like, now they need to just roll it all into one price. Roll it in. Give me the roll-in price. Because you don't want to see all the lines. Because you do have a moment where you're like, all right, I'm fine paying up to, everyone has a number on their head. They're like, anything under $350, I'm okay, it feels fine.

And then you see something for like $329, and now you're like, all right, you know what, but then you don't factor in. But then it's like $400 and something with the taxes and the resort fee. But the resort fee, the part of it that sucks is when it's for stuff that – for someone that needs to send a lot of faxes and has a ton of family in Alaska, you should be going to Vegas every weekend. You'd be making money. But I feel like for the rest of us, it makes no sense. Which you could probably just go there and do those things without even staying at the hotel. Right.

Yeah, cell phone's free. Like, yeah. Yeah, it really is ridiculous. It's also free everywhere else to call Alaska and Hawaii. Thank you to the listener at the end that said if you're going to be in Vegas anyway, you might as well stay for that game. I think what's going to happen is Sunday morning you're going to be already tapped out. Your wife's going to be tapped out.

You're going to be, especially if you're driving, you're going to be thinking about the traffic and how it's going to continue to get worse. It's going to take you like six, eight hours to get home. It's going to be horrible if you stay for the game. No, no, I think I'll beat, no, because when I mess up in Vegas is when I leave. If I leave late enough, I think it's better. I think you can't leave. You either got to leave at like 6 a.m.

Everybody has the same thought, man. Yep. I don't think so. No, you either have to leave before 9 a.m. or you're screwed. Yes, I agree. Where does the flip side of that go, Omar? There's no flip side. Omar's right.

It's all bad. As the day goes on, it gets worse and worse. 8 p.m., I would guess. Okay, so I leave at 8 p.m., I'm home by 11, 30? You're not going to do that. You are going to leave before that game begins. that's what i think too this plan sounded so much better you changed it to go to that game or to watch that game you're not gonna watch it i'm gonna have to listen to it you're gonna listen

to it in the car and then get mad that your bet didn't pan out that's my prediction that's a good weekend in vegas baby there's a message that i think will put ally in a good mood before she delivers the news i'm a forward of bleep and guess it's a drunken message i'm watching the on Allie's show, and I'm going to agree with the Bud Light Bros. Allie, watching you drink the air on water, girl, you a team. Girl, you a team.

Some people argued that, Allie, yesterday while you drank the water for the water test, the expensive water test, you were the hottest you've ever looked, and I don't disagree. I don't know if you've got some sort of a pregnancy glow going on. No, I don't. Omar, I know that you physically, you are not into Allie normally,

but you saw that video yesterday. I did. What do you think? I mean, I think Allie is prime Allie right now. I think it was Allie drinking water. What do you want from me? Thanks, Omar. That's true. The best she's ever looked.

You know what I think it is? It's the Erewhon effect. Oh, is that what it is? When a girl is holding an Erewhon cup. You think if we had done the same thing, which she was holding four Big Gulp cups, we would think very differently about her? Yes. Let's do a test.

All right. Let's do another test. Today, we'll get five Big Gulp cups. Five different Slurpees in front of Allie, and we'll see. One of them with a lollipop in it. If she looks less hot. Man, if that's incredible, if that's the Erewhon effect, I get why people are paying so much. I think seeing a girl drink Erewhon is hot for some reason.

Wow. I think it gives you a couple of points. That girl is financially irresponsible. I'm just going to start writing it on my water bottles. That's a good move right there. That'll turn you less hot again instantly. Let's get into your news. Then a brand new hour of the show can officially begin.

Grab your Adderall. It's time for ADD News. I know most people still have World Cup on the brain with the final coming up on Sunday, Spain-Argentina, but there's also more announcements regarding the Olympics. L.A. is still doing a lot of things to get ready for the millions of people that will be flooding the city in two years, even though we have literal floods happening in WeHo this morning. I have still not been able to get tickets to the Olympics. However, I was contacted about the ability to volunteer,

And this has a lot of people upset because the Olympic Committee is opening up applications for 60,000 volunteers. They say this is an unforgettable way to experience the Olympics. They need people to, of course, you know, direct parking and be there for the games, ushering people. And this is a way that you could possibly see some pre-Olympic Games, though you don't really know what you would be assigned. But because the Olympics are also charging insane amounts of money for the games, people are like, how could you expect 60,000 people to work for free as well? And yes, they do this every single time. But because there's so much gouging happening, people are upset that they're doing it this time. Also, it's a volunteer position.

So you don't really I mean, zero F's given from the very beginning unless you end up getting a cool job. Because I would imagine of the 60,000 jobs, some of them are awesome. You're like, hey, you're going to stand right there and catch the javelins. Yeah, I mean, that would be great. But then if that's why I was even thinking about volunteering, I was like, maybe I should sign up and then just see what I get assigned. But if you get direct traffic in the parking lot outside the venue, that sucks. Yeah, or like pick up horse poop and whatever that, you know. Oh, yeah.

That's actually being kind of nice. That'd be so funny if that's the one you got. We should all volunteer and see just what we get. And then if it's good, we'll hold it. And if not, we just say, all right, bye-bye. And I imagine that of the 60,000 volunteers, you know, hundreds of thousands will apply. And I bet a third of them will actually show up depending on what job they're assigned. It's probably a lot of people thinking like we do.

I'll just see. You think there's any chance they're saying it's volunteer, but if they actually hire you, they're like, by the way, we just wanted to see who was real. You're going to get paid? I think they're going to give them like a swag bag. Oh, like Olympic merch? Totally. Like a previous Olympics? But if you think about parking attendant, right, the person directing traffic, that could be an opportunity to make money.

Yes, you can. You know, if I was the person who was like, oh, you know, they come up and they don't have a parking pass. I'm like, what do you got? You got 50 or 60, but yeah, exactly. Go right in. If I'm the one wanding everyone in, I could make a lot. I mean, if you want to be, you know, unscrupulous, that's a fun, that's a good time to do it. It's a good time to be unscrupulous.

You're connected to all, you know, this world, this massive, biggest, I would argue. up there, probably bigger than World Cup even, as far as worldwide exposure. Oh, absolutely. So you have the ability, if you get a power position, oh man. I know. And then you feel like you can really develop a complex. Now we're talking. If you want to stay young, you don't need Botox or Scrotox or any tox.

According to psychologists, what you have to do is go to the movies, go to the theater, or go to a museum. They have proven that this can slow down the physiological aging process. And yes, there are many museums that are open on Wednesdays and

free to the public, okay? A lot of them, it's the first Wednesday of the month, but still, it depends on the museum. There's different deals. I looked at it a lot yesterday. This expert claims you don't need any sort of medication or any sort of injections. You just need to have more fun? Well, it's culture

engagement, they say. So, like, going to the movies is an engaging activity and you're seeing something new and you're experiencing something new, potentially, with other people. If you go to the theater, I know that when you went to the Sound of Music, I'm sure that was a culturally engaging process for you and you felt younger for it. And then the museum

it gets your brain working in a different way. Yes, but, and this is what we talked about during Clickbait earlier in the week, right, is that if you want to, quote, like, live longer or live healthier or whatever, they say you need to constantly create these experiences for yourself that are, you're not doing your, you know, your mundane stuff you do every day.

Yeah. Does this include concerts? You know, it's funny because it doesn't say concerts, but I would imagine that that's included. It specifically says the cinema, the theater or a museum. Definitely not the concert that Jake goes to. No way. No way.

No expert's going to say you got to go see Warm Handsy or whatever. Right. Dead chant. You have to see really bad guitar solos over and over and over again. It was sick. But I think Jake will live the longest out of all of us because he just does, you know, he does the naps, which they prove can help, you know, slow down the aging process. And I think he's got a thriving, like, you know, social life. I mean, he's by himself a lot, but he still does a lot of social activities.

You know what I mean? Theoretically. People's commutes might be very affected this morning by the flood that's currently happening in West Hollywood. But there was also a big problem yesterday for anybody who was attempting to ride the bus because there was a crazy guy trying to ride on the bike racks. And it caused quite a delay for Metro users. Act like a little kid, bro. You're old.

What a nightmare for commuters. Check out this new video. This man holding up traffic and messing with this bus in Koreatown. He was seen sitting on the bike rack and pulling on the windshield wipers. That man claims he wasn't let on the bus, but he eventually stepped aside and let the bus make its way on after about eight minutes of heckling. Between that and the Waymo problems, I don't know how anyone gets anywhere anymore. It's truly remarkable. It really is. I think Jake's method of just walking around his inner tube that he floats the river with is probably the best method we have currently.

Yeah, especially now. We have. I know. You could probably go by inner tube and get there faster. Get into a brand new hour of the show in moments. Perhaps it will be the greatest hour of your life. Only one way to find out. You're stuck with us this morning. This is the world famous K-Rock. It's done for 10 o'clock on a Thursday.

Have yourself some breakfast for dinner. Call it BF Thursday. Take a picture. Tag us in it so we can celebrate the greatest meal of the day twice. And since most people skip breakfast around breakfast time, might as well enjoy a breakfast burrito or some eggs over my hammy for dinner. You'll appreciate it, I'm sure. It's a move.

That's right. She said it. That's the official mascot right there. Not into eggs right now. Oh, really? Mm-mm. Yeah, you're like in weird. One day, something sounds good to you.

The next day, you're nauseated by it. You were all about the egg salad last week. Earlier this week. Oh, was that earlier this week? Yeah. Now you're off? Now I'm done with it. Wow.

Maybe I'll be back on it tomorrow. I don't know what's going on. What's your... Made the egg salad. I was all excited about it. After two days, I was like, this is the most disgusting thing I could possibly imagine eating.

What's your craving right now? What do you want? What are you into? I never crave sugar, but I want chocolate. Yeah? Yeah. I want ice cream and froyo. Do you want a bag of M&M's?

I have it in my drawer. Emergency M&M's. You want them? Vanessa, top drawer. Give Allie a pick. My desk. Regular? I got peanut and I got peanut butter.

Choice is yours. Oh, wow. What am I going to do? Oh, those are eggs. I'm sorry. Those are eggs. No! It's just a drawer full of eggs.

There you go. Look at that. Bring in Allie double. That was an emergency. I keep that for when Vanessa's getting her lady thing. I keep that in my drawer in case Vanessa's getting all, you know, moody and whatnot. Vanessa, do you want to split these? I can't even fight you because that's so true.

I know. That's my habit, though. I can tell when Vanessa's being all moody and stuff. I go, just go to the drawer. Grab it. That's right. What do you think, Allie? Good?

Yeah. I'm taking it down. I like the new flavors that they're making. These are like giant. They almost look like protein M&Ms. I'm just like, they're all jacked. Those are. I should have told you that.

17 grams of creatinity, Gemini. Anyway, in a moment, we're going to chat with a guy. If you're done with us dummies, we've got a really smart guy joining us in moments. His name is Stefan Burns. He is a geophysicist, which I can hardly even read. And he is that. And he has an interesting theory about some of the earthquake activity that's been happening lately in Southern California and Northern California. It's just up and down.

What, do you think we're all going to die? Well, he thinks that a couple of faults are happening around the same time. He's got a theory, which he can explain it because I'm not going to be able to do it the right way. But he's got an interesting theory as to why the big one is here. It's not almost here. It's here. And what are we going to do about it? Nothing.

I'm watching the big one right now. Put down a packet of M&Ms before my very eyes. And so this man will be on with us in just a few moments. So we can all freak the F out together. Earthquake expert next. K-Rock Klein Alley Show. I'm sure you have memories of earthquakes. if you've lived here for any sort of period of time.

And, Al, you were in the... I was in the 89 earthquake. I remember that, up north. In the Bay Area. That happened during the World Series. It happened during the World Series, yeah. My father-in-law was at the World Series game when it happened.

And then there was, of course, a big one here that happened. I mean, the one that people still talk about was... Is that Loma Prieta? No. Is that a different one? I think the one here that people refer to as Northridge. I know that you guys get upset when I call the big ones, you know, a couple of times.

Did you guys feel that 3-3 we had today? Yeah. But I remember a while I was missing out on all the earthquakes. I was always in the wrong place. I never got to feel them. I was in the car. People would be like, man, that was a good jolt, and I got nothing. We were on the air for one.

Yeah, I remember that. One time, very quick, fast one. But the longer ones are scarier. Yeah, but this guy who knows a lot more and can speak a lot more intelligently about it than we can, he is a geophysicist. And because of some of the earthquakes that happened recently, I think there was a couple of four-pointers that happened in the last week. Yeah, in like the middle of California, right?

Right, but because of where they hit, this is what's interesting, and this is where these guys are way smarter than we are. He's looking at the location of exactly how they hit and which faults they hit, and he thinks that maybe this is the sign of something. And I don't know what's happening. I know we had on What's Her Face Dr. Lucy, and she gave us some intel on earthquakes, and she's been studying them her whole life.

But I'm fascinated to find out what Stefan Burns says about what we were experiencing right now. Good morning, Stefan. Thank you for joining us on KROQ. Hey, good morning. Thanks for having me. So just, I've described you as a geophysicist, just for, I mean, I know what that is,

but for everyone else, what does that mean? So basically a geophysicist is someone who studies the earth and they really study the physical properties. So think about how sound waves travel through the earth. Think about how the field of the planet is. I know it's very boring. I think it's fascinating. So let me ask you this.

You believe that we're doomed in the immediate future based on what's been happening recently? Well, I don't think we're doomed. I don't think California will fall into the sea. But I do think that we have larger earthquake activity coming. I mean, eventually that will happen. But we do have this, like, 35-year curiosity, if you look through the record, of bigger earthquakes. And Northridge is a good example of how, just in the recent time period, we're at a high in earthquake activity overall. So we could have something big in 2026.

Oh, great. Fun. And what does that have to do with the earthquakes that took place earlier this week in California? Well, the one thing you'll kind of discover as you research into this, and it helps to also research it from a global perspective, because California is one place, and the seismicity that's happening here is kind of slow. Don't make up words, sir. Seismicius, come on. We're on to you.

What does that mean? That's a condition. Yeah. Oh, okay. Thank you. Yeah. Really, I mean, really dumb it down for Allie. She's pregnant.

Okay. Oh, okay. So there's lower magnitude quakes, like you described as three or two. Those can be important, but generally, once you start to get to higher magnitudes, like four, five, six, you start to, you know, place a little bit more import upon them. And the 4.1 that struck in Fraser Park is exactly where the San Andreas and the Garlock Fault meet. Garlock Fault is super overdue. San Andreas can have up to magnitude 8 earthquakes.

I think potentially 8.1, 8.2. Oh, man. We'll have to wait and see. That's huge. That's a big finale. Just wanted to ask you, Stefan, at what number should we be worried or freaking out? Because Klein tends to freak out over a 3-1, 3-2. When is it proper to say, whoa, that was scary?

3-1 is worth, if it happens right by you, I mean, if you're by the epicenter, 3-1 feels like a sixer, right, sir? It can be a big jolt. I mean, so it depends on the location. So up north, you have the geysers, the hydrothermal field. And every now and then a magnitude 4 pops off there, and there's always 3s and 2s. That's because of hydrothermal activity, so don't pay much mind. But a magnitude 4.1 right at a key junction, and then exactly the next day, further down the Garlock Fault, up to the northeast, you get a 4.3 in an earthquake swarm with 91 events. Now it's like a pattern and a trend that's emerging, showing you the evolution of strain across that fault and how it's shifting, and that's a major junction for the San Andreas.

So it's the patterns that really leap out to you that cause you to take note. And, you know, then you can start to think, well, maybe is this a sign for some bigger strain release to occur? Are you currently wrapped in bubble wrap right now? I just came back to California, though. I don't know why I flew back here. I'm flying into the danger zone. But what are you predicting? Are you predicting a bigger quake that would happen in that exact area?

or is there still a possibility that there could be a giant earthquake in the ocean that would then trigger a giant tsunami? Because that's Vanessa's freak. She's got a freak eye about that. Yeah. So the 924s and the swarms that they've had on the Garlock Fault aren't necessarily enough to relieve pressure on that fault. And you do often get this preliminary activity before a bigger quake occurs. And that has usually a pretty distinctive signature.

So this doesn't feel exactly like that. It more so feels like, okay, time to pay attention to California again, because we also had that 5.6 up in Ukiah and Willits just a week or two before. So that's a big earthquake in a historic area that doesn't get these sort of earthquakes. You claim in a recent article, you said that we are locked and loaded for a major rupture. You believe that that is the condition we're currently in, correct? Yeah, yeah. Because you look at the reoccurrence interval and you look at the strain rates that have been building up and there's paleoseismic studies.

So basically looking at past ruptures on faults from hundreds of years ago, they have ways of measuring that. Yeah, things are locked and loaded. And there's been tons of earthquake activity all around North America, like, for example, Alaska and then Kamchatka, the Ring of Fire. And it all has to balance out at the end of the day. And California is the one place that hasn't had a big move and everywhere else has. So we're not going to be lucky forever. So you think we're up like you think our time is now and it's probably not going to be five years or 10 years from now. But as you said, we could have something pretty serious.

Twenty twenty six. Yeah, for sure. And I mean, I think the furthest out you have that 35 year rhythm that I mentioned. So if we get to 2030, 2032, and we don't have something big, then maybe it kind of slides off until the next 30-year peak. Because we see this clustering, like 89, 94, right? You mentioned those two earthquakes. That was during the last peak. So then it might be just our kids' problem. That's nice.

And there's nothing we can do as far as alleviating the stress. You know, like we can't have Metallica do a concert and create some kind of an earthquake to relieve some of the stress on these fault lines and prevent the big one? Well, I mean, there's nuclear things that perhaps they could do, the government, with bombs, but it may actually trigger the big ones. Oh, man. So it could prevent it or could cause it? I always used to think, and I know this is going to be probably a little hard for you to understand, doctor, But like the little earthquakes that happen are kind of like the earth's farting. It's letting out a little gas, like those little ones, right?

And you do that so it doesn't completely blow ash and have a big one, right? Is that scientific? In your situation, yes. In your situation? Thank you. That's how I mean it. In your situation, a bomb would not fix it. Right.

These magnitude 4s haven't really released any notable stress on the Garlock fault. But they could be, you know, they're more so messengers of what's happening. And if you look specifically at the type of earthquakes they were, they tell a story that's a little bit beyond here. But there's more to that than just, you know, the magnitudes and locations. You can really piece together an evolution of what's happening on that fault and then how that connects into San Andreas. That's why this is important. Stephan Burns on with us has close to a million people following him on his YouTube channel, YouTube videos where he talks about earthquakes, et cetera. And you probably are, I would imagine, one of the leading experts in the world on all things earthquakes.

If you were going to bet a million dollars on us getting something north of a five in Southern California, California this year, you would bet the money on yes? August looks hot. August could be, it could also be end of July. I mean, those are two critical months that I'm looking at. Okay, I just want to make sure and see if I should pay this credit card bill or not. Yeah, I know. I've got that in a situation with the IRS. Should I take care of that?

Wait. Just wait for the earthquake to hit and then be a declared missing person. Great. Cool. Just fade away. We have a plan. Well, listen, this has been very informative. And dumb on our part.

Freaking out. Thank you for spending some of your time with us. Our listeners appreciate you as well. And this is, by the way, a lot of people say this guy sounds hot. Is he single? Are you hot and single? Yeah, so it's a requirement for being down here. I don't know what he said.

Thank you, guys. Your phone cut out. What are you? Hello? Oh, yes, yes, sir. Yes, sir. You're single? Maybe not hot.

Single, though. Ladies, this guy, someone wants to date a California geophysicist. That is a brag to mom. Man. You even have a smart name. Stefan. Stefan. There we go.

There you go. Thank you for this intel, and we will, regardless of the fact if you want us to or not, we will call you again. Sounds great. Look forward to it. All right. Thanks so much. Appreciate it. Quick break. We're back with more show next, at least we think. Who knows? We could fall in the ocean by then. All right. One question to make you feel smarter about yourself, perhaps. Win something from K-Rock.

I think we'll actually give away the first official Make Alley Fat Again hat. They have not arrived yet, but they should be here in moments. So if you're able to predict whether or not Johnny will know the answer to a very easy question, you will be the first proud wearer of a MAFA hat make Ali fat again those hats arriving any moment now here at KROQ

thanks to our friends at Print Guru for hooking us up with these hats so we can give them to our listeners and we say good morning to wow there's a lot of people that want want to play the game oh look at that look who's on the phone

hold on let me just figure something out bless you excuse thank you hey one-armed Gary yep did you get your other arm i get it today oh my god i feel like every time we talk to you you're you're like flying cars you're always like just in the future it's never actually happening i thought we talked to you

before the fourth of july you're about to get your other arm right on your birthday i was supposed to get my arm and um remember and i was going to come by and show it to you and um they didn't have it whatever this and that they never have it and then i said look i'm gonna get when i get it i'm I'm going to go to K-Rock and show them my arm. So, I mean, it's going to be a big deal. And they go, oh, well, it's coming for sure today. So I'm going to go there at 12. So today at noon, you're getting your second arm.

Right. So hopefully, if I get it tomorrow in the morning, I'm going to come by and show it to you. Oh, that would be amazing. Are you buying this from Back Alley? How do you, like, it's coming today. You'll get it when you get it. It's a custom arm, right? It's through insurance.

And you're putting on a pull cue. A pool cue. But doesn't he need insurance to go through that and, like, install it into him? Like, doesn't he need surgery? No, no. This thing's going to clip on. I'm sure he didn't get one. That's probably magnetic or something.

Yeah. How do they attach it to your nub? I just put a rubber on, and then I put it in there and slipped it on. It's like suction? He needs a rubber. All right. Well, look, I'm excited. Tomorrow, a one-armed Gary, we will see you here with your brand-new arm.

We'll do a christening of your new arm, okay? Right on. Man, I wonder if I could beat him in pool with his pool cue arm. Oh, we got to do it now. Yeah, let's do it. Put up another thousand bucks. The one grand two-hand pool tournament is back. All right, well, good luck, Gary.

Don't be a stranger. If you get that other arm, come on by. You've been milking this one arm. If you don't, be a stranger. Yeah, yeah. Call us back in a month and say, today's the day, you know? Let me say hi to Jake, a different Jake, thank God, in Culver City, who would like to play the game. Johnny doesn't know.

Hey, what's up, Jake? Hey, how you doing? one question one question only it's time for johnny doesn't know johnny doesn't know and i was like okay oh johnny doesn't know i didn't know vegas was like in vada for like a while johnny doesn't know johnny doesn't know gelato sounds like jello johnny doesn't know it like goes wiggles yesterday here at work there was a retirement party that took place uh for someone that has been here for 35 years which is unheard of never seems to happen but uh this man who will remain nameless was here for 35 years and that's right kevin graham all right and uh yesterday was

a big retirement party uh in the middle of his speech thanking everyone for being supportive ali apparently he did cry because he wasn't sure if you were going to make it and then you weren't there so he was pretty upset about it i had uh i had to get somewhere people were asking where you Oh, stop it. They were. No one was asking where I was. It was true. Nobody asked.

I don't think anybody asked. Three people asked me, including our boss. Well, that's what happens when you're not the people. Forget it. But I did strategically, as the speech was ending, shuffle my way over to the food table. Yeah. And then right when they said, all right, everyone, get something to eat, I was like, boom, second person in line, first out the door.

That's a great move. Who was first? You know, some lady I've never seen before. There was a lot of people. But I had mad respect for her. There's a lot of people I've never seen before, though. Well, the reason I bring this up is because the question for Johnny today is, what is a pension will johnny know what a pension is yes or no uh all you have to do is predict will he

know or will he not know jake oh i think he he does know you think he does know okay every once in a while johnny gets one of these right and we're all surprised uh johnny what is a pension um it's like about money in your job and i know it's different than a 401k a pension is like money you put uh that gets taken out of your salary and gets put into like some sort of like account for you and then it grows over time you can't take it out but once you get old like kevin and you like retire then you receive your pension so like after all those years of working you get your money back so kevin graham's probably sitting on a high pension right now after working all those years uh not 100 right but close enough john i'm impressed you knew any of that i thought you were

gonna think it was something they served at the i was so convinced he was gonna be like i think that was next to the tacos. I did get confused about when people get a pension because not everyone gets one. No, and a lot of times there's unions involved. Like, unions are the ones...

Because 401K, anyone can have. Yeah. Yeah, but teachers, et cetera, you know, if you work a job a certain amount of time... For a certain amount of years. Right, you get this... You qualify for a pension.

Right, and you get some sort of a kind of nonstop salary even after you're out. Yeah. All right, Johnny, you were close enough. Jay, congratulations. You're the first official owner

of a MAFA, Make Alley Fat Again hat. Unless you would like a I've never been intimate with Jake t-shirt Well that would be interesting Because you also have the name Jake We do have a lot of merch coming today to KROQ Do you want the Maffa hat

Or the I've never been intimate with Jake shirt I think I think I'll take the hat The hat makes me laugh Get yourself a Maffa hat Hold on one second Don't worry there's plenty of people that want the I've never been intimate with Jake shirt The shirts are terrible.

No, the shirts are sick. They're actually really fire. I'm going to wear one. Jake, would you be happy to know that we've contacted your ex-girlfriend who's agreed to model the shirt for our baby? No, I would not be happy. Well, we have. Do you guys have a whole website of all your exes? Yeah, but technically, I guess some of them have been intimate with Jake.

Yeah, you got to take that shirt off. All right, congratulations, Johnny. You're a genius. Wrap up the show with takeaways after this. If you got anything that you'll bring with you in your lives that we covered on the show today, Earthquake-related stuff, parenting stuff, dental scams, and much, much more. You can call us now, 800-520-1067. We'll do takeaways.

We'll get the hell out of here. And then Sluggo will be coming by with more Disneyland four-packs for you coming up this morning and afternoon on KROQ. Takeaways, get the hell out of here. Sluggo's in with more of those Disneyland tickets, and then you'll win them again. Megan and Kevin will have them for you coming up again at 3 and 6. So three more chances to get yourself four tickets. Basic math means 12 more Disney tickets today.

We'll do them again tomorrow morning. Also, tomorrow morning on the show, it's $500 Friday, a chance to win some of Allie's cash. $500 could be yours bright and early. Please, if you're celebrating or enjoying breakfast for dinner, BF Thursday style, tag us in any pictures of your dinner breakfast feast so that we can repost. And that's all at the Klein Allie Show. There's a podcast that goes with the show you can download. You can also find us on YouTube, clips of the show. And if you're wondering what things look like here, including just how hot Allie was yesterday drinking that air one.

The air one effect is real. It is the air one, not I. It was magnified by the fact you had five cups in front of you. So if you look a little hotter holding one cup, imagine. It was a five and I became a nine. Yeah, if you walk around just holding nine or ten bags and cups of marijuana, apparently people just assume you're way hotter than you are. It's crazy.

That is a scientific theory that we've proven on the show today. Takeaways, and then we'll officially get the hell out of here and leave you with Sluggo. What do we got in the world of Takeaways, Allie? 626, there's a gazey river on Sunset. Watch out, big flood in West Hollywood. 909, when Klein's kids are away, he needs his medicine. What do you mean? 714, ball gags help you sleep better.

Mm-hmm. Let's see. 714, my takeaway is congratulations to smelly-ass Todd. 818, the fancier the font, the bigger the scam. 650, sweet damn it. And 818, my takeaway is the heat wave is drying up Moist Joyce. I think it's the opposite. I think she's sprouting.

Yeah. I'm hot as hell. Oh, you don't want to know. It's very moist. Yeah, it's going to start sprouting. Oh, God. Oh, good God. Think about that for a moment.

And that Klein's wife would rather organize the entire house than have sex with him. I mean, she's going inside of, not only inside of rooms, she's going inside of drawers of rooms. She's finding areas to organize that are... That didn't exist before. Yeah. They've never been organized. She's never once asked to look at the stack of mail that is just sitting in a drawer. And all of a sudden, she's like, we should really go through all this.

I'm like, are you serious? You're picking this stack of old catalogs over sex? In her defense, she can have sex with you and then still have plenty of time to go through the mail. That's my argument. It's like a speed bump on the way to the mail. Yeah, but once you're in the organizing phase, it is tough to get out of it. You can't be pulled away for things like sex. You've got a mission.

It is beyond frustrating, the amount of excitement she has about organizing. It does sound exciting. I kind of want to go over and help her. Oh, God damn it. It's great. When do you have time to do that without kids in the house? You never do. But you'll never catch up, so what's the point?

What's your takeaway there, Jake the Nerd? I can't go out tonight. My simissius is acting up. Yes, that simissius that I get you every time. What's your takeaway, Vanessa? As long as it's covered by insurance, Klein is down for anything. I don't care what they want to do. That's right.

As long as it's covered. Thank you, Vanessa. Very flirty. Takeaway there, Johnny? The only way to fix your chi is with some D. That's a good one. That's from Buddha right there. Omar, takeaway?

It was taken. Ali, takeaway? My takeaway is beware of the fart lines. And that's what's going to get us. Thank you for our guests all joining us today on the show. Do it again tomorrow. Try to do it better. Here's a helpful jingle to remind you to listen to us.

Oh, tomorrow we'll be blowing out all this new merch also. So get yourself a I've Never Been Intimate With Jake shirt tomorrow, a Make Ali Fat Again hat, a Maffa hat tomorrow. I think we have some other limited edition run Klein Ali Show hats. So we'll be hooking you up tomorrow. And between now and then, here's a song so you remember us. Here we go. Klein and Allie, it's just okay.

Klein and Allie, it's just okay. Klein and Allie, it's just okay. Just okay. Thank you, ladies and gentlemen. And that will just about do it. I know what you're thinking. How is that it? Time just flew.

God, I would have loved a little bit more Klein Allie Show. Well, good news. There is more Klein Alley Show, and it's for your eyeballs. Yep, you can check it all out on live stream at KROQ's YouTube, and you can watch along, you can like, you can subscribe. Get us to that 100K. Or if you're listening to this, maybe we're there already. No, we're not going to edit that out, so you've got to hear Alley stumble over the word.

Regardless, if you want to be even more involved in the Klein Alley Show universe, that's right, it's a whole universe, just like the Marvelverse, only way less impressive. And way smaller. You can get involved on the Instagram, Klein Alley Show, the socials. Technically, I think we're still on Twitter, although I don't know if we've tweeted in a while or X'd in a while. But more importantly right now, they're really pushing this YouTube hard. So please do us a solid.

Go over there, KROQ's YouTube, subscribe, follow, like, all that stuff, and want to watch some of the content, stuff that we do on the show. You can also share with other people. YouTube Shorts, a great way to introduce people to the show that may not be listening. You're already putting up with us and listening to this weird announcement after the podcast. So at the very least, you could force a friend to do it as well. And now listen to this entire thing in 2X. You can listen to us on the live stream. You can follow us on Instagram.

Oh, I want to eat my breast.