Klein/Ally Show: The Podcast - Jake Introduces The Violent Femmes

Episode Date: July 29, 2026

About to get into a brand new episode of Klein Alley Show, but first let's tell you about our good friends at the finest airport that ever was and ever will be. The San Bernardino International Airport. Especially when there's summer travel plans, it can get expensive at these airports. That's why you gotta go to this airport where parking is just five bucks a day. Plus you got those easy trips, San Francisco or Provo, Utah. Maybe you didn't plan anything this summer. See how easy it is. Don't be one of those people who has to pack your patience. Go to San Bernardino International Airport. Okay, enough shilling. Now it's time to get into a brand new episode of Klein Alley Show. Unsolicited compliment about the show, and then we'll give you a reason to take that back immediately

because Jake was in front of a crowd of people last night, which is something that is not good for Jake, even though he does do stand-up comedy from time to time, including tonight, his return to an indoor theater, not indoor theater, excuse me, an indoor room for the first time in a long time because Jake is usually what they call an outdoor comic. Yeah. He stands outside the comedy club. Side of the road, back alleyway. But today he's going to be doing a show at the Improv, a real place I've heard of, but not the actual main Improv where the headliners go.

The lab where they do experiments. The lab at the Improv where they store the meat that they serve you at the restaurant. So Jake will be there later today as part of a comedy show, but that's not really what we're talking about. Oh, Jake, by the way, we did hear that Secondhand Cindy and Blind Charlie are going to be attending your show tonight. Oh, cool. So you'll have some VIPs there. That's probably about it, but congratulations for getting those people. and it's her birthday, so it's a big deal.

Before we get to this audio of Jake, I want to play you this. Crickets are ready. They're lined up outside. Man, the crickets are lined up outside the improv already. It's hard to see the line, but it's there. Our master's performing tonight. Rally the troops. Here's a guy that thinks the show's decent, and he will change his mind when we

play you the audio of Jake introducing the Violent Femmes, which he thinks went well. And Allie and I have heard it, and we don't agree with you. Okay, well, I disagree. Would you have any reason to believe why we may be right and you may be wrong here? Yeah, because all the people in the band and who work for the band really enjoyed it.

How do you know that? Because they told me. Are you looking at their... What else are they going to say? Terrible intro? Are you looking at their reactions while you're doing it? Are you watching their faces and stuff? Yeah, and I got a laugh.

It was solid. I'm going to play it for you in a second. You can judge for yourself, but here's someone who would like to show it. Why are you so defensive, by the way? When I get on stage, you guys are always complete assholes about it. And always just crap on everything I do. It pisses me off. It's like, hey, load the audio.

And you never give me any compliments ever. This guy's giving you a compliment. Good morning. This is Rick Ridley from the L.A. area. You make me keep my sanity here in Iowa. No one understands me being from California. I like it that way. I come to L.A. occasionally.

You guys are awesome. Keep it up. I thought I wouldn't like Kevin and B when they first came on. I like you guys better than Kevin and Bean. I hate to say that. You know, Kevin and Bean were the legends, but I like you better. Thanks from Rick in Iowa. Sadly, your opinion doesn't matter because you're a flyover state half-wit,

but thank you for the kind words about the show. And let's be honest, that is just not true. But regardless, we'll accept that for now. Jake, there's a compliment. And here is Jake now introducing the Violent Femmes, 45 years as a band. And wouldn't you know that Jake starts out by making it all about Jake. That's the part that's interesting. Well, and the other thing is that when Jake is doing a show, when he is booked, you can tell because he is practicing every opportunity he can get.

Oh, is he practicing his lines yesterday? So he'll be doing like, you know, like on the show, I'll notice he's like doing bit, you know, like he's trying to practice his material kind of. So when he was going on stage last night, I was wondering if it was going to be him like workshopping some of his jokes. Oh, for tonight. Yes. Tonight, we celebrate 45 years of the Violent Femmes. That's a great way to start. You got the crowd.

I mean, I would say that's full crowd participation. 45 years of the Violent Femmes. Listen to that. Just raucous. Raucous. Raucous applause for Jake. I mean, it's unbelievable. And then listen to this.

That's a big deal. I wore pinks for this. In this heat, pants. Okay. And then you've lost them. And now you've lost them. Where's the laughs? Well, he got a laugh at first, but then he kept going.

You got to move on to the next thing. He tripled down on the pants. It's also very important to acknowledge that this is halfway through the show, so people are already obliterated. Oh, yeah. You know what I mean? That's cool. So you'd think you'd have them already in the palm of your hand.

So obviously people don't know Jake at a Violent Femmes show, so they don't know that he's known for wearing shorts. Right. So you're also asking a little bit of the audience to know you enough to know that you wear shorts 99% of the time. Most of the people at the show, including all of the band, are wearing pants. So the idea that Jake is wearing pants is not that crazy of a concept. Right, out of context. Right.

I think it still makes sense. You should have said, you probably don't know this about me, but normally I would be in shorts. Well, everybody is normal like that and wears shorts. I didn't see one person at that show in shorts. You didn't even go to that show, so shut up. I don't know if there's video. We watched the video. I watched the video.

How? You saw people's legs in the video? Yeah, I thought it was a pants commercial. Yeah, all you guys were on stage. What are you talking about, man? I'm looking at everyone. They're all in pants. You know, Kevin Ryder is known for wearing cargo shorts every single day.

That would have been a great joke from Kevin Ryder. I would have said, that's the shorts guy. I mean, over the course of three decades, he's built the reputation of the shorts guy. He's been setting that slow play joke up for years. It's great. I should give him that joke. In this heat. Pants.

So that kind of lost him. But don't worry, Jake. That went south quick. But Jake, oh, he's so mad right now. Yeah. Because he felt really good about this. Yeah, he felt good about it. And you know what?

The first time he made the joke, even though people don't know him, don't know it, they still laughed. And they laughed pretty, you know, it was a pretty good laugh. And then he kept going with it until there was one last, whoa. Yeah, 310 wants to know, why did you introduce the band in the middle of their set? Because that's how they asked me to do it. Yeah, because they were being presented with a plaque or something, right? Yeah. You were giving them a plaque to say what?

Happy 45 years of a band? And to celebrate the 7 million album sales. Yeah, I don't know. I've seen this happening a lot recently where bands that have been around a while, I guess they hit a new number, right? Because people are rebuying stuff again. I think I just saw, I think it was maybe Jimmy World just got a new plaque presented to them at the Vans Warped Tour.

Like these albums that have done well All of a sudden have now hit another milestone So Violent Femmes just hit 7 million And so Jake was brought out there originally To give them this plaque and talk about his pants So he's done the pants part of it So now it's the plaque part Cool, can we fast forward now? Can we keep going?

Thank you 10 seconds of the goddamn intro Just play it Just play it and let people think And let people decide Are you wearing pants or shorts right now? I'm wearing shorts okay in 1983 they gave us a record that means so much to us all

actually factually over seven million of us also i think it's uh important to note that uh jake's reading this from his phone so he's oh he is yeah unfortunately i thought that was a bad look jake you're reading it from your phone uh yeah i wrote it right before i went on stage Actually, factually, Omar, from his phone? Actually, factually. When you've been a band for 45 years, you don't do it for recognition. You do it for the legion of fans that complain as soon as you play something new.

Oh, that's good. Awesome. You know, it's funny. The crowd liked that. You know who didn't like that joke? The band. Yeah, they did. They liked it a lot.

No, there's one guy that literally keels over. Yeah, because he was laughing. No. I don't think so, dude. It's not laughing, Jake. He's mad. The shorts guy is hilarious. The shorts guy.

That's crushing it, man. Once again, Jake on stage introducing the Violent Femmes to thank them for 45 years of blistering the sun and other things. You know, not knowing that he read it off his phone, though, that was well-worded and nice. Right. You know, and I had a good joke at the end, but I do think, you know, when you see like a bridesmaid giving a speech at a wedding and she's reading it off her phone, I just think it looks so tacky. Right, right, right away.

Even, I know it seems old school, but even just pulling out a piece of paper feels like a little bit more effort went in. Right. You'll look at the phone. You used a printer. Yeah. Because the Violent Femmes are artists. And you do not F with artists.

You do not F with the Violent Femmes. it means so much that K-Rock means so much to the Violent Femmes Gordon and Brian please accept this platinum plaque with the LA Rock Camp for Girls

that we got from a trophy shop downtown we hope you enjoy it because framing is very expensive That's a good joke. Yeah, I like that. I like that, too. Jake, you got a vote of three of confidence on the framing show.

Great. Awesome. Is it good yet? Are we doing crap on some more? How many nights are they playing at the Bellwether? They're playing until Friday. Every night until Friday. Are you doing this every night until then? Obviously not, because it sucks so bad. We're not saying it sucks so bad.

Yes, you are saying that. That's exactly how you start this goddamn bit. There's highs and lows. You started by saying it didn't go well. and you just crapple over it. And then it turns out to be good, and now what are you saying? Oh, no, it's good.

I'm saying there are parts that are good. Not that at first you weren't. Well, because the shorts thing was stupid. No, you said it all sucked. The band started this whole bit saying it was terrible. I didn't say a whole thing was terrible. We're going to start with a compliment, and then we're going to make you feel bad.

Well, listen, I think it's beautiful here when the band speaks, because they finally get a chance to say something. Be the love of the Femmes. Here's to 45 more. And listen to the violin. Thanks, Jake. Thanks, Jake.

Nice pants. This is what they say. Thanks, Jake. That's fabulous. We would love to thank A-Rock for supporting us over the decades, really. Seven million records sold and probably six billion because of that. Is he on his phone for this part? He read that off his phone, too.

So we congratulate you, Violent Femmes, and we thank you for all that you've given us. and it's been a pleasure to be friends with you through most of those years and thank you for allowing Jake to have his make a wish and go up there on stage and introduce you and give you this plaque for allowing us to play the song many, many, many, many times over the years including right now, not scheduled

but I feel like it's a fitting tribute to the great Violent Femmes