Klein/Ally Show: The Podcast - Jake's Crickets

Episode Date: July 20, 2026

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Jake, is it true you've got a roommate in the shack? Oh, yeah. Well, it's funny for us, but you don't find it very funny, huh? Yeah, it sucks. It's progressively getting worse and worse. Usually it's just crickets at my show. That's probably what they're saying, too. Yeah.

It's probably what the roommates say. Your comedy regime? Jake, as you know, is the king of the crickets. And when he performs comedy, it doesn't matter where he goes. There always is the sound of crickets, which is the universal sign of what is being said is not funny. Yeah, it's wild because one of the first sets that we heard him do, he gave us the audio and we listened to it. And you can literally hear tons of crickets in the background. And I guess you were performing outside?

Yeah, that show was outside. He always has a reason why the crickets are there. And the first one, it made a little sense because he's like, well, the show is outside, so what do you expect? And we go, all right, fine. But then we saw him at a bar in North Hollywood that was inside, and the crickets were there as well. Yeah, that's because someone was playing them. Well, that particular time. Remember during the drive-thru where the guy was like, oh, there was crickets there, too?

I know. They follow him around. He's like the Pied Piper. Yeah, you went to the drive-thru, right, the new drive-thru confessions, and we also heard crickets there. Yes, it's ridiculous. Because I never hear them. Do you? Well, Jake claims that he now has crickets that have moved into his shack.

And this is some of the audio that he hears at his house. Oh, my God. And this is inside, Jake? This is inside this morning. That scratching you here is Kibby on the rug. I've been trying to kill herself. She's trying to dig herself out of there. I've got to dig myself a hole.

Trying to tear her ears off. Oh, my God. That's probably so much more annoying for a dog, too. Of course. And the thing is, you can't find it. I know where it's at, because when I tap on that part of the ceiling or the wall, it shuts up for like 30 seconds. But then I can hear that over my AC all night from like 9 p.m. to this morning. Jake, I would think for a guy like you that hears crickets everywhere you go in your life,

that you would at this point just be kind of, it would just be background noise. You wouldn't even notice it. I was hoping so, too, but no. Yeah, because, I mean, you really do, you are constantly surrounded by crickets. I've never, it's almost comical I mean it is, it's comical It's way more comical than Jake I think this is like when Jewish people go to Israel

Like it's their Mecca It's their big trip Or it's like I have to see Jake The crickets travel around the world to meet Jake Yes, it's like their lifetime religious experience You're a cricket, you've got to go ahead and hear Jake Try to tell a joke so you can let out your cricket sounds Exactly

Damn, I feel like a cricket in my house now All night! He's waiting for you to tell a joke. You think that's just one, Jake? Well, it's just one inside my house. There are numerous outside, and it's pissing me off because I keep two spider bouncers at my front door,

and it got past those. Oh, so you keep... There's a couple big spiders outside your place? There's two spiders. There's a spider that builds a web across my door every night, and there's a spider in a succulent by my door. I'm trying to shut you in like a coffin. You should listen to nature, dude.

I don't think they want any parties. So the cricket now. I think nature's trying to take over your space. Dude, it sucks. What's the plan at this point? I think you have to move, right? I don't know. I don't know.

I can't get in the crack where he's hiding. I stuck a knife in there, tried to stab him, and then he just shuts up for 30 seconds and starts up again. I wish we had footage. Is this your weekend? Of Jake versus the cricket. I just wish, because you're never going to beat it. It's like tearing up the floorboards. Damn you!

And then he finally gets to one. There's like four others where that one came from. Yeah, they could be breeding. I mean, I don't think there's any audio you've ever brought us that has not had crickets in the background. And then, yes, I know the thing that your comedy show that was a listener or someone there that you were, even though you accused me many times of playing the sound effect,

you realize this is just going to make this happen again. Like now that you are the kick it king. That's a tough one to say. You know what you are. Yes, thank you. I don't think you're the kick it king either. No, but the reality is, Jake, this is your life now. I mean, there's no escaping them.

It's terrible. You must be giving off some sort of a pheromone. You sound like you haven't gotten much sleep. No, I'm exhausted. All because of this? He's just up all night. Yes, man. I took a nap, and I woke up at 9, and this thing was going.

I could hear it over my AC. It sucks. Some people actually pay to have sound machines that make this noise because they think it's so stupid. It'd be different if it was like a chirp, chirp, chirp, chirp. It's not like that. It's this rapid fire like that constantly. Yeah, it is very fast. It seems like a cricket on crack.

No stops. But it's probably so excited that he's around Jake. Well, Jake. They're Jesus. Jake, congratulations. You are at least beloved. I know that it's very important for you to be loved. And we'll find out later if you're getting any hits on your new updated dating profile.

I want you to try some of your comedy routine in the Jake shack and see if the crickets are louder, quieter. Yeah, do us a favor. Tonight, when you're there sitting around, do some of your work on your material. Let's see if it brings out more of the crickets. Or if it leaves. I'm hoping it's so bad it goes away. Yeah, maybe that cricket. I can see that cricket leaving.

I'm just saying, someone put a shoe on me and end it. Do that Mary Jane joke, appearance of my boner. All your old stuff. Do the classics. Yeah. Your greatest hits for the crickets, Jake. It's a good idea.