Klein/Ally Show: The Podcast - Jake's Meltdown

Episode Date: July 29, 2026

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This is the world famous K-Rock. Good morning. Welcome to your K-Rock. It is Wednesday. We are Klein Alley Show. Nice to meet you. Thanks for coming back for more or perhaps finding us for the very first time right now. No judgment.

It will take you some time to get acclimated to the sounds coming out of your radio and or smart speaker. Slightly less smart speaker right now. My name is Klein. That is Alley. Morning. DJ Omar Khan right there. That is Jake Znerd. You've got, oh, you're still mad?

Yeah, I'm pissed. Wow. I'm surprised this is what's making you so mad, Jake. It's a culmination thing. A what? This happening over and over again. I see. So this is just kind of the straw that broke the camel's back?

Yeah. And, you know, Klein wrote me a text. I'm going to write him back. But I just hate this kind of attitude. This kind of attitude? When it comes to me performing on stage, yes. because I think it perpetuates this narrative that I suck and then it invites people to come to my show

and do stuff like playing cricket. That I do not agree with. None of us stood by the cricket. Yes, you did. No, we didn't. You declined, defended it. No way. Yes, you did.

I called you a cricket apologist and then you kind of backed down. So you defended that behavior. See, that's funny. First of all, I was at your show. You know how rarely I ever go out to anything? I went to your comedy show to support you. You think I want to see a guy there

play cricket sound effects and derail your comedy that you worked on? I kind of think you do, yeah. No way, dude. I am rooting for you. I even said tonight I'm actually trying to adjust some things to go to your improv show at the lab. Why would you go? I suck.

Because you know I don't think you suck, Jake. You never said that? If I thought you sucked, I wouldn't have your mic turned on every day. Don't you understand how things work around here? I do understand. Do you understand that when you perpetuate the narrative that I suck, it emboldens people to come down to my show and play crickets for 20 minutes? Jake, we perpetuate that we all suck. We all suck.

That's what we'll perpetuate. Yes, but you're out there performing, and people come down to your show playing crickets for 20 minutes. I go on stage now, and I get people making Cabana Klein sounds. I'm trying to introduce a goddamn band. You think when we do an interview with a band, and someone yells, Ellie, ask a long question, it makes me feel good? This is the world we live in. Yeah, we all have a good laugh at that.

But I also have to acknowledge that I ask really long questions sometimes. Yeah, I understand. Jake, do you really not think that we think you're funny and talented? If we didn't think that, you wouldn't be a part of the show. I think you think that sometimes I'm funny on the show, but I actually do think you think that my stand-up sucks. What? I got lost in that statement. Sorry.

It's a set-up. He's getting to the punch. I'm sorry that you feel that way, Jake. I really am. I thought, especially yesterday after we did our team-building improv class, we all learned that there are ups and downs, but we all got each other's back and we support each other. Well, thank you for saying that. But I thought you really knew that. I feel terrible

that you didn't think that. I mean, I really... Well, it doesn't make me feel good. I make a lot of effort to do stuff on stage and make it be cool, and then I just get crapped on the next day. And it's like, why do I even try? Well, you're not doing it for us.

You're not your stage shows. You're doing it for you. That's your dream. This is also different, Jake This was a K-Rock thing And this was a stage announcement It wasn't your stand-up Yeah, and I didn't have to do it I was asked to do it

I know And you shared it with us I thought I did a good job And all you did was like Well, we have a compliment But we're just gonna be crappy here in a second And it worked out great Can I ask you a serious question?

Because people can see the video for themselves And they will make their own opinions And they're gonna say Wow, that's Jake up there He's crushing it and everything The pants shorts joke wasn't great The other stuff you said The frame one we all said was great.

I know you don't want us to break down your announcement. Yeah, we acknowledge that there was some stuff that worked. But that last show you did, the Gookite. Do you remember the Gookite show? Yes, yeah, of course. Okay, and we talked about it a lot. You think that was a giant setup to make you fail? How many people did we get in that place for you?

Was that the most crowded that bar has ever been in the history of that bar? Yeah, probably. For you, Jake. Yes, and it made me feel like crap because I had to deal with crickets for 22 minutes. Didn't we find out the guy that played the crickets isn't even a listener of our show? No, he is a listener. Oh, I thought he's a friend of yours from that bar you go to. No, I mean, he's an acquaintance.

I knew who he was, but he's a listener. And he said there's numerous people doing it. We don't like sabotaging anyone when they're out in the real world. I mean, if Omar's DJing a wedding, you don't need to go up and try to sabotage his thing because that's his side hustle. Jake is a comedian on the side. No, and when that was happening, it was painful to listen to because that was too much. And Jake did work really hard on his routine.

So it is messed up to just screw up somebody's entire and distract them throughout the entire 45-minute set. That's where I think some people think that we are all rooting for each other to fail. That's really not the case. It ends up that we will probably fail, but we're actually rooting for each other to succeed. And then when we fail, we all have to come in here the next day and hear about it. And that part sucks. Yes, exactly, because there's a lot of vulnerability that happens when we get up on stage or when we talk on the microphone every single day, and there are going to be mistakes that we make, and we are going to point out each other's mistakes, and that sucks to hear sometimes.

And it doesn't make me feel good all the time, but it's also what friends do, I think. Yeah, I mean, that's the thing. There's a lot of people I don't care about, and I wouldn't even waste time listening to their sets or going to their shows. Sorry, waste time is probably the wrong way to put it. Choose to spend time going to their shows, Jake. I'm sorry that you've gotten that impression from it. Johnny came in here and said Jake's really mad now. He's kicking the desk.

I wasn't kicking the desk, but I was yelling. I'm sorry. I'm sorry that you took it so personally. I understand, but like I said, sometimes it has real-world consequences, and it pisses me off. And it makes me not want to even do it. Okay, let me ask you a serious question on the topic. Because we went over your dating profile last week, and we talked about things that could be better about it. And we had a good laugh at it.

And you admitted there's probably some things about your previous dating profile that weren't great. Allie took it upon herself and Vanessa. They fixed it up. I believe you're getting laid left and right now. You're like goddamn Will Chamberlain back there. Now, are you mad because we poked holes in your dating profile? Are you happy that the result is that now you're going on a new date every night with these beautiful women? I heard you just met a hot girl that plays Magic the Gathering, which didn't even – the odds of that are one in a billion.

Right. Yeah, we haven't met. But I invited that. That was my premise. I was like, yeah, let's do it. I was ready for you to make fun of that and do that. The other stuff, like, I actually really try. All right, well, then we will not speak of this show you're doing tonight ever again.

Thank you. Forget you've heard about it. I don't know if Jake's ever... Don't go. Yeah, in fact, don't go. If you really care about Jake, you will not go. Perfect. Perfect.

is this uh is this a good uh feeling are you going to be angry the rest of the show no i'm gonna be fine do you want your birthday pizza early no no i'll be fine all right 818 gets it geez what a whiny ass bitch jake man up all right relax with these comments we don't need these comments there are so many comments in every which direction hey sky you're on k rock this is not how i wanted to start the hour and we're going to be behind already and then i'm gonna get yelled at by vanessa and that's the most terrifying thing on the planet so go ahead yes sky i just want to let you guys know that i think that you guys are disproportionately mean to jake because you're jealous that he's so funny and sweet and cute and

awesome and talented and i think he's the best part of the show hey listen i think there's plenty of people that feel that way i think that's great we're very there's plenty of people who feel that way no i don't just saying it stop i look i think that it may seem that way because i believe that jake can be the most frustrating person on the show because he's the most stubborn on the show so he can be the most polarizing and easy to get mad at would you not agree yeah i do not agree i think he's funny and i think everything he says you guys are like because you're jealous no that's definitely true i definitely don't think they're jealous we're all jealous jealous of that shack All right, listen.

I don't want this to take a dirty turn again. I think it's important that when things happen, and we've crossed lines on the show, it's happened before with Allie and I, et cetera. And I admit, I like seeing Jake get mad. Love it. Nothing makes me happier. But this time it turned around to not being funny.

No, yeah. Usually it's funny, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, Jake got involved. Well, I didn't know you were that mad, really. Yeah, Jake got involved in it, so it became... I thought it was like Bucky's is a gas station mad. I didn't think it was like mad mad. Right.

I mean, it is a story. Jesus Christ. Jose on KROQ, quickly, yes. Fine, fine, fine. Jake, man, you guys are hurting. You guys are busting us chops big time, man. You guys, just apologize, bro. He did apologize.

He did, it's fine. Not really. I apologize. Not really, it was a half-assed apology, I mean. I stand by my statement. I thought the shorts pants bit didn't go great. But once again, I failed in front of large crowds of people numerous times. We all have.

So I feel comfortable saying that. I've lost the crowd many a times. I'm used to that. It's my sweet spot. Klein's thing is prop jokes. They always go terrible. Oh, my God. I bring out a little bag of snacks.

I say, hey, who wants to share these snacks? Yep, and then you make a Nickelback joke. I say, who's ready for Nickelback? No matter what band's playing, who's ready for it? I do that same bit over and over again. It's never worked. One of these days, it's going to work. So trust me, I know what it's like.

You want to open for me tonight and do that bit? Oh, that's how you can make up? all right let me uh we're way behind i gotta take a break let me answer that after this break we gotta we'll be right back uh we have clickbait to get to we have man versus machine i mean i could put all these calls on the air some people they're not gonna you're not they're not gonna say what you want to hear jake but i believe it yeah we're gonna take a break everyone calm the f down we'll be back with more show next