Klein/Ally Show: The Podcast - Kid or Pet

Episode Date: September 21, 2026

We'll get into an episode of Klein Alley's show in just a moment. But in the meantime, let's tell you about our absolute favorite place on the planet. Yep, that would be San Bernardino International Airport, where you can go through the airport process without waiting in long lines and overpaying for parking. Quick connections to the Bay Area and the world plus ski and snowboard in Provo from San Bernardino all winter long. Every other airport, you're going to be in long TSA lines. You're going to be miserable. You're going to say, oh, I've got to get there two, three hours before my flight, not at San Bernardino International Airport.

And now we send you on a direct flight into our podcast, which starts right now. K Rockline, Ali's showing. A lot of people sending in additional gay sports highlights that may have slipped under the radar. Ali missed him. This one, I'm not even sure we can play on the radio. But boy, it is gay. Very gay. I think Tom Brady's, was that Tom Brady?

It was Tom Brady, which he is a man. He drops those soundlights left and right since he's been broadcasting. I need to review whether I can even add this to Gatesports, but if I can, I will. But he's gay, right? So he can get away with that. Too gay for Ali, even. Yeah. I had the pleasure of spending a big chunk of my day yesterday into the late evening hours, actually into this morning, in the ER.

And Ali wanted to play a game a while back. She pitched called Kids or Pets because it's hard to tell anymore if someone is telling a story about an accident that happened and then how expensive it cost and how much damage was done. And then you get to all of it and sometimes you're like, anyway, that was my toy poodle. That was Bojangles. And you're like, oh, I thought we're talking about a kid here. It's hard to tell because people that have animals. Swallow to Lego. I mean, all that stuff, you don't really know.

So I will let you play the game. Because how nice you are. Like for me, it definitely would not be a pet at all, ever. Right, if it was, or spent three minutes with them. You would know it was a child because he would never spend three minutes with his dog by choice. Yeah, yeah, for sure. But for people that have a hard time, you know, and by the way, I have, keep in mind, It's going to be a harder game than normal because normally I would have had, I have two kids, normally I would have had.

I'm not going to tell you what I have two kids and two dogs. I had one. Now I have two dogs including a puppy and I have two kids still, I think. As of last night things could change. This game also goes beyond medical problems. I mean, this is I threw a birthday party with a magician and I customized food. All that stuff has happened for dogs too. I got a custom pair of socks with their face on it.

Totally. You're like, oh, is that your kid? That's my dog. Tattoo of their fate. Right. So it's a hard game to play. So I will take you guys through some of the beats, and you can guess if this happened with my kids or my dog. Is it ER?

ER's involved, yep. You don't take dogs to ERs. Well, there's a pet ER. Yeah. What you're saying is 100% like most things you say, false and wrong, but you will probably stand by what you're saying is right because you always do. The emergency room and a hospital? Does we're talking about? No, he's talking about a pet.

ERs for dogs too. emergency rooms for pets, Jake. You should know this. You're a pet owner, supposedly. You don't know where the nearest petty are is for your dog, Jake? Nope. Are you for real? I just know where the vet is. What?

So I woke up on yesterday morning, and I should point out, on Friday, flu shots were given. I woke up yesterday morning, stepped out of my bed. There was a big pile of vomit on the floor. I found about four or five other piles of vomit around the house. kids were sleeping, dogs were sleeping. Both sleeping, both acting lethargic,

wasn't sure where the vomits came from. Couldn't really tell just on piles of, could have been the wife too. Couldn't rule her out. Good to me. Could have caught my reflection in the mirror. Yeah. And as the day went on,

the vomiting continued and the lethargy continued. And so did some chat, did some chat. PT questions. Nice. That's the real E. Am I right? And ended up making the decision

middle of the day, later in the day yesterday, ER had to be an ER trip. ER trip. Doctor looked over, decided we need to do some tests for a variety of things because this ain't normal

and we think that this could get bad if we don't handle it. So I will say before where you can go ahead and guess kid or dog um i have been given the first of a few bills uh by this no spend september by the way great idea uh the first bill is north of a thousand um and there's and that's the before the next because you get billed as the things happen so i have uh so this is step one around midnight last night did return home with either my kid or my dog uh so the question is alie

kid or dog so this is tough um obviously this could happen um obviously this could happen into either one. Kids throw up a lot. They love throwing up. I love it. They're also, if this is a flu vaccine, flu shot related reaction or something it sounds like, but could also just be a coincidence.

Your life is also more chaotic than most people. So I have to factor that in. But because you got the bill right away, I think it's going to be a dog. Because if it's a person, they give it to you like a month later. So I think the fact that they handed you a bill right away, that

screams dog to me. Interesting. And I think you should just it's done. If this is the puppy, I think it's a lemon. Get it out of your house. Anyone else want to take a shot at this? Or are we going to lock in on just dog here?

I feel like it could also be a kid because he had a kid party, which means you had a bunch of kids around. It was a double birthday party weekend. A lot of cake, a lot of pizza, I bet. They probably had a lot of sweets. There was a lot of cakes being eating cupcake. all cakes and all cookie cakes, cupcakes,

ice cream with ice cream cakes. So, yes, there was a lot of junk food. I feel like Bruser watched the little puppy eat its poop and then she was like, you know, I'm going to try this. The family thing now. Yeah, exactly. Perhaps. She thought we all got a good laugh when Bruger, right,

when the puppy ate his poop, so maybe Bruser wanted to get the laugh started eating her poop. It was hilarious. Good guess. So we've got split room now. Yes, Jake says kid because there is no such a thing on the entire planet that's an ER for dogs, right? I think he said ER is a person. I think you're going to do that with your dog.

You'd be like urgent care or something. You want to say emergency room. He's getting caught up on one little detail. It's very beginning. I bet I'm right. I bet you $1,000. You bet me $1,000. You're right?

I'll take that bet. Whoa. Are you for real right now? A thousand dollar bet. Between El Chippo and Jake? For no spent September. And what is the bet exactly? That it's a dog.

You're saying dog. I'm saying dog. saying kid, right, Jake? Mm-hmm. Okay. Oh, wow. No way. This is exciting.

Jake, are you for real? I don't even have a thousand dollars. Good luck. That's kind of bad. This is not fun. What do you have? I have $5 and a new trotsky. Come on.

Come on, Jake. Real bet. Allie, real bet. I'll reveal in a moment. It's a real bet for me, but Jake won't take it seriously. Jake, what's the real bet? I don't know. Let's make a real bet.

We just did. I don't have $1,000. All right. You have $50? All right. There you go. Jake, you owe Lally $50. It was a dog.

Yes. And not the puppy, by the way. It was Jerry. Who we believe we're not sure because we still need to get some testing done. I have not yet done the full stomach ultrasound, which is going to be another $1,000. Damn. What? They believe that, and this is on me, guys.

I'm going to take the heat on this one. I'm going to take the out. As opposed to all the other ones that I also am taking the heat on. Just to give you an idea of how I make a bad problem worse, I told you about this puppy, and the puppy has been eating its own craps. Which was really nice. I got to meet the dog in person on Friday.

He's like, here, hold it. I'm like, ooh. Yeah, Alice who discussed the dog. Then someone suggested, if you want the dog to stop eating its own craps, you need to put meat tenderizer in the dog's food. And then, suppose, supposedly it makes the crap smell worse and the dog doesn't want to eat it,

which seems crazy because I would think anything with meat tenderizer is going to be more delicious. And I'm sorry, who told you this? That's the point. I don't remember where I heard it. Oh, okay. And that's where I always end up getting in trouble. I hear it from someone and I think that. I told you that, bro. I told you my dog had this same problem.

Well, I'll tell you what is the problem is that the meat tenderizer that I was using went into all of the dog's foods and Jerry ate a ton of it. it and apparently when you eat the seasoned meat tenderizer as opposed to seasoning packets. It's very bad so it really messed him up good and he

I think because of the sodium in there or something. Yeah, it's too much salt. He had to flesh your system. So. Shut up loser. Luckily there was about six or seven doggy ERs I had to pick from emergency room for dogs. Says it right on the sign

and went to one and the most expensive one I could find. Well, I went to the first one that would actually see me without an away to another, you know, a lot of these. The problem is they kind of like with humans where they go, what's the biggest emergency here? Doggy chest pains. Every time I'm about to get seen, some person runs in holding a dog that's like, you know, ha ha ha ha, ha, ha. You know, and they're like, all right, you're back of the line again. Oh, man.

So finally, so the answer is, yeah, it was. So my no spend, September is now up to. thousand, I think it was 1,200 just for that thing. So they could do the flush and a blood test and a bunch of other things. And they believe that that was the culprit of this whole situation. Yeah, well, I know that my friend's dog ate a seasoning packet, like one of those crockpot seasoning packets. Oh, that jammed them up? Oh, my God.

Yeah, they had to get its stomach pumped and had to do the, yeah, Epicac, all that stuff because they can't handle dehydrated spices like that. So you gave it to your dog willingly. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Gave willingly. I have a massive... So you're in 2 grand right now? No, I mean, if I...

If the vomiting continues today, I need to go back and they want to do a full ultrasound of the stomach. You said you did it willingly. Was this on an accident? No, no, he gave them the meat tenderer out. The meat tenderizer all over the food. Like, I was goddamn Wolfgang Puck. I thought you said before you knew it was supposed to be unseasoned.

Yes, because it says on the front of the thing, unseasoned meat tenderizer. Which is enough for me. I don't like to read. But then upon showing the back of the thing, the ingredients to the vet. This is very season. It lists all the seasonings. There's tons of seasonings in the ingredients.

Did it say four dogs? You don't make it for dogs? No, it doesn't say four dogs. There's a giant picture of a perfectly seasoned steak on the front of it. You use it on your meat? Probably tastes great. I've got a lot left now that the dogs can't eat. So now you're down 1,000 plus how much was the meat enderizerizer?

Well, then there was that too. That was, you know, order that on Amazon, but it was 50 bucks. I thought I didn't notice. I should post a picture of this. It was. I didn't notice this until after the fact. Should have been a dead ringer. It's called Adolf's.

Ooh. Meat tenderizer. Oh, no. And today of all days. Another Adolf creating problems. I mean, you think, nothing, I don't know about this brand at all, but right there I should have been like, that's a no order. Yeah, the sadistic.

Adolf's meat tenderizer. Almost took my dog out yesterday. Maybe I'll buy some with my 50 bucks. Ali, you want to make a great steak. That's all you can buy. That's all you can get. So anyway, Ali wins the game, Dogger Kid. And Jake loses the game.

There's no such thing as Amel Ears. Woo! Because they're all over the place. And Jake should split the bill of Klein for losing that. That's a good... I like that. That's a good answer. Yeah.

It's K Rock Klein Lely's show.