Klein/Ally Show: The Podcast - Klein's Late Food

Episode Date: June 25, 2026

New episode of Klein Alley Show is about to begin, but before that can happen, Alley, let's tell the people what they need to know. You mean about San Bernardino International Airport? Of course I'm talking about the San Bernardino International Airport. Easy, close, and not LAX. And parking is always just five bucks a day, which means it is El Cheapo approved. Fly nonstop to Provo, Utah for all the skiing, snowboarding, or wives you can handle. And of course you can fly into my hometown of San Francisco, San Bernardino International Airport, when airports smell great. like a lot of people i spend a good portion of my life particularly in the afternoon from the second the show ends all the way straight up through dinner time with a back and forth

conversation with my wife about what anyone feels like having for dinner no one has the answer she always says i don't really care you just decide i say i've decided and then she never likes my choice it happens in every relationship it's cliche and it's annoying and usually you get to a place where you just go i'm just gonna make one thing or pick up one thing eat it or don't choice is yours that's a good move you're like i'm just coming home with this food this is what it is and it's gonna sit there on the table until it's gone and if you don't want it sorry good luck and uh and for whatever reason though i think that society has shifted now because my mom will always talk about like look i used to make one thing and if you didn't like it tough that's what

it was and sometimes you didn't eat because you said this sucks and you went upstairs yeah and You just go to bed hungry, and your stomach learns to deal with it. But are you eating out every night? No, no, no, no. I will usually go like this. I will make an effort to go to the store, buy a bunch of crap, cook through that stuff, eat through the leftovers of that stuff, and then eventually I'm at a point where I don't have enough to put anything fully together.

So then it's one of those nights. It becomes takeout night. Once a week, I try to not do it more than once a week, at least during the five-day Monday to Friday week. Obviously, tonight, BF Thursday is going to be breakfast. That one's eggs all day, eggs all night, done and done, and everyone loves it, and BF Thursday is a massive hit, but last night was one of those ones where it was running around doing crap all day.

We shot a video for this show afterwards, so it was an order situation, and like you, when I have the opportunity to not have delivered, I will always attempt to do the pickup, not just because it's a little cheaper, but I feel like it's a little bit more quality control. last few guys that have dropped off food the food's been in their lap when they come show up with it it's a little less appetizing when it comes out of a grown man's lap and i feel like you get the food faster that's what i would have thought so last night i put in the order and it says your order is ready for pickup at 508 p.m which is wow early dinner huh it wasn't going to be that no because i was going to pick it up bring it home and have it ready to go by like

six but i was just going to have it ready don't have to think about it done and done one thing off the list. This was a place called Health Nut. Oh, I... Oh, good night. That's one of our places that we go. Hey, good night. That's what it's called.

Health Nut. And not my... What kind of place is this, Toity Toity? Not my choice. No, it's like salads and sandwiches and stuff and soups. Not my choice, but I know it's one of the few things that my wife will not fight about and they have like grilled cheese. Oh, they have massive salads too that are like work.

You feel really full. So they say to me, put in the order, pick up, ready to go. Your order will be ready at 5.08 p.m. I say, great. I'm going to give them even a five-minute buffer. I'm not going to show up at 5.08. Now, is this through a third-party app, or is this just straight through there? You can do it through their app.

I went through their website. Because then you have to earn the leaves. Which is, oh, I didn't even think I earned leaves. But it's annoying and not user-friendly like it should be, but I still went through the process because I go, this is the best way. My whole thing is, if you can eliminate all the middlemen, not only do you save a couple of bucks, but there's a better chance your order doesn't get screwed up.

Yeah, because it's coming through their app, and there's no markup, because usually on like DoorDash and other sites, they mark up the price. By the time you're said and done, they did the research. They say sometimes you're paying as much as 50% more by the time you get the food if you go through all that.

So go through the process. They give me my pickup time. I'm all excited. You know, I'm Mr. 530, but hey. I can be Mr. 508. If I'm Mr. 508 for the night, I'm Mr. 508. I can handle that. I give them a five-minute buffer.

I pull up around 5.15-ish, and I say, hey, here for that order. Not a big order for Kevin. And they said, hey, we're slammed right now. Your order has not – we haven't started making it yet. What are you talking about? It's a salad, right? It's a salad and a couple of other non-cooked things. Nothing cooked.

It's like salad and wraps and stuff. Like nothing that requires cooking. Right. It's all pre-made. Pre-made. And I look back there, and there's a conveyor belt of chaos going on behind the scenes. And I feel bad because I do think that right now there's just not a lot of – I feel like no one has enough help anymore. Everyone seems understaffed.

And you feel bad about it, but they go, we haven't even started it yet. Now, look, I put this thing in somewhere in the – I don't know, 4.30, I think is when I put it in, when they gave me that 5.08 time. So it's been almost an hour already for salads. It's been almost an hour. Nothing. So then I go, well – No good place to wait in that area either. Nothing.

You're always standing awkwardly in front of somebody. I say, I haven't even started it yet. She goes, yeah, sorry, we're all backed up. And at that point, what am I going to do? Am I going to be a dick and complain? Or am I going to say, you know, cancel it? That's no good for anyone because then I'm back to square nothing again. Yeah, then you have to make all the decisions all over again.

Did they give you an estimated time on how much longer it's going to be? She goes, thanks for bearing with us. We'll try to get it out quickly. Fast forward to 5.48. Whoa. So, 40 minutes past the pickup time, an hour and whatever since I ordered, and they hand me... Are you doing push-ups in the corner at this point?

I am doing push-ups. He sets his kettle down. Jotting in place. And they hand... He's picking up all the racks and trying to bend for us. They hand me the salad. I'm going to show it to you, Omar, because I got it right here. This is what it looks like.

It's a salad like this. Oh, wow. I can tell you went Chinese chicken. Big trough of salad right there. And the wrap. And she goes, listen, I'm really sorry about the stall there. I'd like to make it up to you. So what do you believe the make-up to offer was?

I didn't ask for anything. I didn't say anything. You were waiting 40 minutes. 40 in person past the pick-up time. God. What do you think? And when you're there in person, like it's one thing if it's a door dash or whatever and you're making a person wait. But when the person is physically there waiting, wouldn't you jump them ahead in line a little bit?

Yeah, I'm looking. I watch them. There's not a lot of common sense. It's not like they're all outside smoking cigarettes. I mean, they're working. They're out there. chopping up veggies. They're doing stuff, but it's just not my stuff. Yeah, but I

think back there it's a little unorganized. And I hear a few other people walking in to pick up stuff like the... Seem upset. Delivery drivers and stuff, and they're all being told pretty much the same thing. Hey, sorry, nothing's ready. A lot of scowls. Chaos there. A lot of angry loiterers going on. What do you think the offer was?

Knock off one of the items. Knock off one of the items? Yeah. Free sandwich or something. Free sandwich? Yeah. Maybe, hey, don't worry, this one's on the arm. Maybe 500 extra leaves? Extra leaves. The woman says to me, to make it up to you, would you like an extra side of dressing on the house? An extra side of dressing. Is it like a jug of dressing?

No, no. It's like a little. No, it's like a three-ounce cup. It's a little. In fact, Omar, I'll show. They do have bottles of their dressing, though, too. And those are good. I'll show you what this on-the-house dressing looked like.

Because I didn't negotiate. I know. But better off, she said nothing. This is what I got. Soak it in. Soak that in, guys. Dude. That's the.

Oh, that's a bargain. That was sorry for the delay. Would you like an extra cup of dressing? You know what? I usually do add an extra dressing when I order from this place, and it is $1.80 for a dressing. So that's what you got off was $1.80. But, you know, it was worth my time. And I realized that the whole idea of, like, trying to make life easier by, like, oh, pick it up.

You end up just making it more hard for yourself. Yes, I know. And then you wonder why you did it. And then you wonder if you should go back to that place. But then forward a couple weeks, you can't boycott because it's one of the few places that you've agreed on. You can't boycott. That's the part. So you're like, oh, I should go back.

I have so many places now that I've crossed this year particularly. You're like, never again. So many places I've given the all. You'll never see me again, and they don't care at all. Goodbye. Good riddance. You mean nothing to us. And then you'll be crawling back.

We take a quick break. When we get back, we have for you news. But more importantly, we have for you a spot on the bus to Santa Barbara to see Royal Otis. That's coming up in your future. And Matt Bellamy, also known by Vanessa as Matt Bologna of Muse, will be in the KROQ studios to break down all things. Big announcements from Muse over the last 24 hours involving music and, I believe, tours and pop-ups events happening around Los Angeles. We'll get to all that coming up on KROQ.