Kump - 110 - 12 Rules For Fatties

Episode Date: May 19, 2022

Ray and Lucie discuss baby formula, Jordan Peterson, and much more. Sign up at https://www.patreon.com/RayKump for an extra episode every week! Get your Kump Hand merch https://bonfire.com/store/kump/

Hello and welcome to Kump. Hello. Hello, Lucy. Hi. How are you? I'm good. Did you get your free sandwich today? I did not get my free sandwich.

We'll get to that in a minute. Speaking of food, want to put you on notice. Scallops. Scalps. I have purchased scallops because I wanted to be fancy. And they came in the package with the Amazon, whether it's fresh, the Whole Foods. They charged me $10 goddamn dollars of the liver.

I paid it because I was assured by you that you could cook scallops. I can cook a scallop. All right, so we're having scallops after the show. Scallops and asparagus. I'll make it with lemon and butter. We don't have lemon. Yeah, we do. Where's the lemon?

It's hit, I hit. Why are you hiding the lemons? I haven't seen a lemon in weeks. A very popular preparation for scallops is, you know, butter and some lemon zest. Well, yeah, a very popular way to, uh, you know, get high is to smoke heroin, but I don't have any. We have lemon, you're saying. We have many lemons. I've never seen a lemon in this house.

I have scurvy. That's how much I don't have to see a lemon around here. Well, I'm excited. I've had a scallop and God knows how long. Are they healthy for you? They're not bad. Yeah, they're not bad for you. What is a scallop?

I don't know if it's one of those seafoods that's weirdly high in cholesterol, like shrimp. Show me a living scallop. I want to see what they look like when they were alive. I want to see what I'm dining on. So excited. oh what is that freaks is that mollusk is a scalp the same thing as a mollusk wait that's a type of creature oh so this is like the inside this is the inside meat of a clamshell disgusting yeah yeah it's it's a type of mollusk why those type of yeah all right well that

looks pretty when it's in like the like the ooze of the of the of the whatever it's in of the shell. It looks pretty gross. Yeah, it's not good. We're going to eat anyway. We're going to use the imaginary lemons. So, no, I wasn't playing. I didn't get the Grubhub notification because I was too busy thinking about scallops.

But apparently, Grubhub sent out a message, a alert around 10 or 11 a.m. Today in our area, too. Did you get it? I actually didn't get it. I only read about it later. Why did we not get alerted to the free sandwiches? But apparently Grubhub just out of nowhere told a bunch of people in New York you can get a free sandwich, free food, $15, right? And the whole goddamn city has been seized.

Yeah. It's like after, it's after that movie The Seedger, Denzel Washington, you know, and Bruce Willis. And they're shutting down the bridges because he's grubhub. Tell me what happened a little bit. So I guess this seems predictable, but it's just like there's, you know, it basically was a disaster. Like it's like all these like restaurants had to pause seamless because like hundreds of orders were just coming in for these free lunches.

Okay. So yeah, it didn't work. And I don't think most people got what they. So basically they just didn't tell the restaurants. and the restaurant's acting like it was Saturday night where they just cancel your order and don't tell you and I have to go and I'm just where's my goddamn it's 4 a.m. I order the 2 a.m.

I'm drunk and I'm on other things and where's my where's my roast beef open-faced you know smorgasborg and they're just they're just saying we canceled us an hour and a half ago didn't even tell you go to the hell. I just feel bad everyone so oh the rest. What about the people who work in the sewers? No one ever goes on Twitter saying,

hey, you should tip the guy who unclogs the sewer. No one. It's a mafia of waiters and bartenders and waitresses and hostesses, all just like, don't show up at the restaurant and ask to be seated unless all your party's there. Don't you understand how we organize? No. I go to a restaurant because I don't want to think about these things.

If I wanted to plan a banquet, I would go to one nights of Columbus and order a fatted calf and a glockin of wine. Yeah, but who has to make that fatted calf? And bring it to you on a plate. I'll find a guy on Craig's list with a blowtorch and he'll just hold it over for six hours.

I'll cut the calf myself. I'll cut. I'll make an incision down the middle and I'll hold it open for the guy. They bring the blow torch. Bring me the blow torch. Hold it into this calf's wound that I've created. And he'll just, like I'll say, no, no, no, no, no, raise the torch. We don't want to cook it too quick.

Slow cooking's how you do it. Raise up the torch. This would probably be, this would be potentially a good role for a comp intern. Yes. holding the blow torch as you hold just the rib cage of a cow yeah we'll take bulk cutters for the ribs yeah the rib cage makes them incision and they just yeah that's how it works when you cut the ribs they kind of spread I'll hold the skin back because it's a fatted calf it's got plenty of skin and fat to hold back that's how you know it's tasty and he'll say you know

my arms are getting tired. I'll say, get some crutches from the local pharmacy. Not to CVS. They don't have them. Go to a local pharmacy. Get some crutches to rest your arms. Because we're going to be cooking for hours.

Slow cook. And I'll be the nights of Columbus. And we'll get some kind of, you know, mariachi band or techno band, one of the two. And then we'll have a little padded calf party. And I'll have to worry about waiters and waiters. and make sure you don't, you know, put your drinkgoers in at the same time.

Shut up, we're all drinking out of a glock in the veil. You know? Right. Sick of the service industry. I'm trying to shame everyone every five seconds on Twitter. Tip this amount. I tip plenty. Oh, I tip 85% if it's rainy.

Shut off. You are, you are, you're making yourself sound like a terrible tipper right now. I'm amazing. I'm an amazing. No, you're a great tipper. You have a great tipper. Yeah. I'm, no, I'm, and I don't even think of all I'm so generous. I feel like that's the appropriate.

You know, you should tip a good amount, you know, at the very least 20, but I definitely, you know, definitely go away beyond that, you know, often. But you're conjuring an image of yourself. I hate this implication. When the waitress comes with a bill, you just, you just start biting her. No, but it's, it's when you get on Twitter, it's like, if you order more than two, I, you just, you just start biting her. It's like, if you order more than two. entrees, you should tip 135%.

If you don't do that, you're a scumbag. You're just, you might as well be a Philistine. And what were the actual Philistines? Were they in the walls of Jericho? No, it was Philist Philistine. Because if he'll use that term, but I mean, you might as well be on the walls.

Oh, Goliath was a Philistine. You fat Goliath. I'll hit you with a rock with a sling if you don't tip 622% on your egg McMuffin, you scum. That's what I encounter. You're off Twitter. You don't see it. It's all Alon Musk and how much do you tip?

It's a shakedown. So, yeah, I don't know why we get on to this. Oh, Grubhub. So I didn't get the Grubhub thing. I wouldn't have, like, honestly, like, I've gotten, because I think I signed up for this. I use Seamless, which is Grubhub. somehow, but not.

They both, it's like, it's like, I'll get notifications that you got your order from Grubbop, but it's not Grubb, it's seamless. So I don't know why I didn't get the little treat. Hmm. I wanted to, I want to take it a treat. We're taking a scallop sandwich, you know? But, uh, so you didn't get it either. No.

See, I wasn't even done anything of it because I'd gotten, I think I signed up for like the trial of the Seamless Plus and then got to cancel it. Yeah. Because it was like, try for it. week and you'll save some money and I was like I know you're up to something and I'm you know this is how I love my life poorly but uh but I guess sometimes they'll get a little deal here here's a little here's a free meal I go thank you so I would just be like oh it's one of those free meals I wouldn't have known why did they do this was this a response to the buffalo

shooting or something what because it was for New York right like it was specifically for well the New York City area I don't know if it was the I really reading this I really thought like oh I guess they wanted to do something nice because of the buffalo shooting I like first of all thoughts and prayers in a sincere way

to everyone there's awful racist attack yeah I mean you know people on Twitter are going like it's not it's like don't say it isn't racist I mean I'm I'm because America so I'm sure people are like are saying like it's not racist but like no this one

is definitely yeah I mean, other ones have been. I'm not sure the whole history of them. I don't know. I think this angle that it was all about crypto was pretty convincing. I mean, there's a crypto element to it, but I don't want people to get the wrong idea. I don't think that was the primary motivation. Yeah, I mean, even like some of the more delusional people are just like, they're just cynical people, yeah, or, like, they point to this paragraph that's about the environment.

But it's like, this is how racist the guy was. Even when he starts talking about, like, pollution and shit, it turns into. to ranting about blacks and Jews. Like every, every issue connects back to that. Yeah. You know, I mean, it's at the very least he wasn't focused. And, you know, he's evil. But, you know, it's like, it's also like just,

this is not, this is not, uh, I don't think this is, thankfully, this is not like a really well written manifesto apparently. I mean, like, I mean, God. This wasn't a home run. Yeah, I mean, I'm just like, look, it's not about that. But thank God. Well, you know, look, I don't know if that. helps sway if people want to be racist and evil they might just do it anyway you know right but thank

god that you know this wasn't like uh the hamlets of racism because that that can't do what we go any good you know we don't need a really well-written manifesto from a racist shooter it was a derivative manifesto at best yeah you know i mean what was he saying about crypto uh he was saying that the only, he was saying that that it was a Ponzi scheme and but that he would be down to get into some crypto that was backed by precious metals.

I hate for, I hate to even have to like address this. I feel like it's not the thing to address. We don't. What? We don't. No, I know, but I feel like this is not this element of it. It's not the thing to address. Yeah. Oh yeah. Of course. It's a heinous crime. Uh, hate crime.

You know, an actual full blow. I mean, Full-bore hate crime. Oh, yeah, yeah, you know, everything down to, like, to, like, searching out, like a higher population, black neighborhood. Yeah, it was terrible, it's terrible. It was very, it's very disturbing and calculated. Hideous.

That being said, it's this, this issue is also, you know, the whole point in crypto is not to be backed by precious metals. Right. That's such a crazy thing. Yeah. I'm not going to say it's crazier than being racist, but it's also very crazy. that like, I mean, the whole thing is that, like, precious metals, like, you know, are relevant now because of crypto.

The blockchain is not supposed to need, like, silver backing it. What is he talking about? Right. I mean, honestly, you would hope that this would just, that would just, I mean, the racism should discredit him. Yeah. But, I mean, at the very least, that should, but I feel like I have less confidence that, like, that will even work. Because I'm not sure people understand crypto versus, you know, precious medals enough. Right.

For that to even, like, you would think, oh, look, even if they are racist, they're not going to fall for this. He's like, he doesn't even understand crypto. But, you know, I hope people have enough understanding of crypto to not fall into this racism trap. Yeah. Who knows, though? I mean, honestly, people will do anything these days.

It's the wild goddamn West out there. I don't, I don't believe that you could tell me that, uh, you know we're literally going to be like pirates are going to take over america like old school black beard uh ships are going to like you know and like we're all just going to dress up like pirates and and eat grubhub free grubhub bills wouldn't wouldn't phase me no least so uh i don't i just hope no one we shouldn't even talk about it about i'm not This came up. I wasn't talking to talk about.

Right. People should, should we just ignore these things? That might be better. I don't know if you ignore them because, you know, eight people were murdered. I know,

but like, I mean, there's a lot, there's a whole thing I'm like, don't say their name. Totally. Oh,

I'm totally down for don't say their name. And like, I'm just saying, like, I don't want. And I'm definitely like on the fence about, like, people probably shouldn't,

shouldn't even talk about the details of the manifesto. But, but in order to establish intent, which is like something the public kind of has the right to, We also wrote something on the gun, so you didn't really need the manifesto. That's true.

Yeah. But let's not get into that. TLDR, what was written on the gun. Right. Yeah, he really wasn't trying to, yeah, but it wasn't ambiguous. But no, I'm just saying, should we just ignore him completely and then, like, maybe they'll go away. That sounds crazy. Yeah.

But no, but I mean, like, honestly, because these people just seem to, like, kind of want to get into the zeitgeist, whether they get credit or not, like, you know, whether they're listed in the credits of the movie. Like, you know, if you were in, if you had a little camey, who was in a, sometimes people make uncredited appearances in movies. You'll see Brad Pitt pop into a baby's day out or something. No, that doesn't happen. But, you know, there's times, like, was Tom Cruise credited in Traffic Thunder? Yeah. Okay, well, there are times type in most famous uncredited roles in movies. because there's got to be,

I'm not talking out of school here. Cape Blanchett, Hot Fuzz. Okay, it's Cape Blanchett was in Hot Fuzz, uncredited. Now, Cape Blanchett didn't get credit for it, but she's in there. And so it's like, you look at that sad,

so I'm just saying by extension, even talking about what happened, that was me. Maybe, maybe it's some people in prison. Hey, I was the one who did, I'm just saying it's counterintuitive, but maybe, Maybe just say eight babies were born.

Look, we use code. Look, I do think like... We should use codes like that. Eight babies were born today. I mean, it sounds off. I'm just trying to think outside of the box. You're advocating for basically a full-on, like, North Korea-style state propaganda. But not for this.

Yes, yes. I'm trying to learn from other cultures. I don't know if this happens very often in North Korea. To be fair. That's true, you know, because you can't just, look, when the state controls the media, I don't think you can kind of, they ignore, look, they typically ignore these things, right? China probably too. China, like, China doesn't like go on there and go, hey, someone attacked us, you know,

some domestic, you know, whatever. Right. And like, maybe, look, all I'm asking for is for a digital passport that tells my social standing. What's wrong with that? nothing wrong with that totally reasonable no I mean like no to your to your point

like it's like I do sometimes wonder if like even if it is kind of true it's like it is like are the narratives like of like white nationalism like being on the rise and almost winning like it you know like it does that does that kind of just empower white nationals to feel like they're part of a really successful

like a militant force I don't know how you think you're successful I mean yeah it's just like Like, it's, you know, there's way, I don't look, I mean, I don't want to, I don't know. It's like, it's, it's, as matter what, I'm not saying, I'm not like saying because I'm afraid to, like, say something offense. But, I bet it's just, it's an awful thing. You don't want to minimize it. But, like, you know, yeah.

But I agree. I think it probably, probably does. And, like, I get, I get how horrible it would also be to ignore that that happened. Yeah. I get that. Yeah. I'm just saying maybe for six months to a year, we try it. It's almost just like when a country is going and shit, you're in a lot of lose-lose situations.

You look, this is not like a great plan. This is like, you know, there's literally like demons flying in the sky. Like the rivers are blood. They're just blood. There's like the plagues and all that. You don't think when each in the story of the Bible was the Pharaoh and Moses, you don't think one of like, what was it, the Pharaoh's advisors are like, I don't maybe we let them go.

Yeah. I mean, we're like, you know, I mean, he's blotted the sun out with gnats. Like, can we, can we get, do we have any kind of, can we just put poison in the air? Like, well, kill people. I'm, I, I look, I'm just trying things out here, you know? That's where we're at here. I'm just trying, speculating spuriously. Anyway, back to Grubhub.

So what was the outcome of this? Or, do anyone die from this? I mean, they just shut it down. They shut grubbub down. Yeah. The whole thing. No, not the whole thing, just their generous project. Oh, okay.

Some people are literally calling and go, like, you know, just like screaming. I mean. I think maybe it crashed. I saw pictures of like certain restaurants and like some, I don't even know what it was. There wasn't sweet green, but it was something like that in the Penn Station's restaurant. And like, but they had one of those things were like, You know how restaurants now, at least in the city, they're like shelves and they put the, you know,

the takeover on the shelves for the delivery guys to pick up. They're stacked. But that might be every day. I don't know. It's probably lunchtime in Penn Station. A lot of hungry people in New York. So Grubbub. Did we give them a thumbs up?

Look, it's like it's not a, it's not a terrible sentiment. The only thing is like you are just kind of thrusting this on a bunch of restaurants. It was kind of a dick move. They should have just placed a bunch of, they should be able to use an app, right? Their app can, they have an app, and coordinate a bunch of restaurants, using the algorithms, not to overstraining any of them,

and deliver them to homeless people. You know, but I guess it's not repeat customers. Yeah. Right. Some of them have phones I hear. Homeless people? Well, there's a homeless like you think of, typically. Then there's also like a contingent of young homeless.

Right. who I don't want to say it's not the same. Whatever you want to say, it's not the same as, like, what you think of typically is the homeless. And, like, it's, you know, they have RVs. They live under the overpass. And I'm saying it's just kind of, they have phones. I'm not sure of the other, like, homeless people

who are a little more, they seem a little more vulnerable. And, you know, out of the element, even though they're in their element. Well, that sounds bad. But you know what I'm saying. You know what I'm saying. We've all lived with homeless people, least in New York for decades.

for whole lives. And then there's a whole new type of homeless person. I'm saying one of them has phones. Right. And they might use Grubhub. Bring it to the overpass. I want my fajitas. What got to live in a house to have a fajita?

Get out of here. Thumbs down, Grubhubhub. Anyway, speaking of such. Speaking of food, again, we've been in a baby shortage. Wait. Excuse me. No, no, no.

If anything, it's a baby excess now. Oh, well, not yet. Look, we don't want to blame the babies. That's not what we're talking about today. We already addressed that, all right? We're moving on. We're talking about them. No, no, but I'm saying.

No. Just can we move on for good reason? Please? Yeah. Okay. All right. We're going to try. move on today see how it works i'm sorry that's all right we have what i meant to say is we have baby

formula shortage yes yes right uh can you this has been going on for over a week i've made tweets about it can you just look up google why is there a baby for i know why there's a okay why is there because uh abbott which is uh one of the major like like the the the baby formula industry is basically uh run by monopolies And that has a lot to do with, like, how the state coordinates with different corporations that, like, distribute baby formula. So this... Wait, explain. There's, like, there's, like, three or four companies that...

So, Abbott... Wait, so I'm sorry. I'm not going to say, Fought. One of them is Abbott. So, Abbott... Maybe just let me explain. Just let me explain. Okay.

Like, so there's three or four, like, industry. Companies like Abbott, you mean? Companies like Abbott, including Abbott, that, like, just run the baby formula game. Okay. Right? and they have a lot of contracts with like state governments and stuff and to do what uh like for ballparks like in order like coordinating with like uh you know public service programs like like like wick and stuff oh okay uh now wick is like is like food stamps for baby formula yeah yeah it's just

it's like they just give out they just give out baby formula yeah it's like a discounted to free like uh baby formula for yeah like women below the poverty line or okay but like uh So Abbott, the FDA, like, spotted some, like, dangerous, like, chemicals and, like, Abbott's formula that made a few, like, babies pretty sick, like, seriously sick. Oh. And so Abbott did this, like, massive recall on baby formula. And that through, like, a series of, like, you know, mishandlings led to a, led to a shortage. So a few babies couldn't handle their shit. You're trying to tell me.

A few babies, you know, like, were these babies just like, I have a lot of anxiety? Yeah. You know, I was reading this sweet threat today just before the show and like, look, I know anxiety is real. But here's what, sorry, that's a suppose, but they were like. No, that's it. I mean. No, no. Yeah.

People were asking about, like, someone was asking like, oh, how do you have a cab in New York City? And it's like, you know, do you actually yell cabby? And like, no, whatever. But then someone down the thread was like, well, you actually have to stick your arm out, though? Oh, I have so much anxiety. I couldn't do that. and it's like what and like it's not so much that like maybe you can maybe you can't but like why are you like bragging about that why are you like proclaiming down on twitter why are you not

if you're so rashly embarrassed to be uh sticking your hands out for the cab right shouldn't you also be embarrassed to say that yeah i don't know but look i'm not a psychiatrist or a psychologist i'm just me and i was only alluding to the idea that maybe these beings babies have that kind of thing where they have anxiety right no no I think it was just like giving them it was poisoning yeah I was poisoning all right well look at fair I'm just throwing it out there uh all right so basically oh that makes about people were blaming capitalism and everything like they couldn't produce enough thing but like but they recalled it like I'm not on the on the side of to be fair because it was poisoning baby but like well yeah but I mean look look I'm not on the side you can't

see it one of the things you can't do in a government is just see a bunch of poison babies and go like, let's see where this goes. But did the government recall or did Abbott recall it? Well, a recall was forced. Well, but not by nature. I mean, companies recall all the time. That's true, but I think it was because of FDA regulations.

Well, look, I mean, like, babies are getting sick. It's like, look, we don't want to be the, we're a baby formula company. If we get known as the baby poison company, that ain't good for business. I know there's like thresholds there, right? We've all seen Fight Club. Right. We all get, like, oh, I determine how many babies can get poison before we recall it. I get it.

But people were framed this like capitalism can't produce the goods. And it's like, well, look, I mean, capitalism stop babies from dying. They also cause babies to die. But, I mean, it's a double-edged sword, you know? No, there is like an argument about, like, who's to blame here because some people... The babies. Mostly the babies. And the selfish mothers.

who don't want to use their tits for their intended purposes. I mean, look, I get it. You want to keep them fresh. Oh, my, oh, I squirt blood whenever I try to breastfeed. Just, just muscle through it. Are you sometimes when, like, the mother can breastfeed, but the baby is just so crazy that they just bite the wrong part every time? Oh, yeah, no, no.

Babies suck. Yeah. Like, babies are bad at some. sucking yeah like they're like uh they have to be like trained to suck right like you like you try nurse it and it's like give me the bottom of that tit there's a whole like there i mean i i think there's like a lot of money spent on like latching experts who are just there to like to like push your baby's dumb mouth in the right position jesus like this doesn't seem like it doesn't seem right how i mean how did we get this far exactly what there's as a species like

Wet nurses. Oh, that's true. I mean, honestly, like, a lot of kids died and then, like, you know, the rich people had, like, you know, I don't know if there were slaves or not. I mean, at one point, they were slaves. The other points, they were just, you know, people who did that, I guess, in the middle ages. You know, there were some serfs maybe. Yeah. But I think a lot of history is like, you know, they figured out who could breastfeed properly and well.

Yeah. And they just kept them full of milk for their whole life. I guess, I'm not, it's again, my point is like, you know, it's not, I, it's not. I don't know if, like, there was ever a time before now. Like, it's probably the best it's ever been. Yeah. You know? I wonder what makes you, like, a good, like, wet, like, a good wet nurse.

A series of exercises, uh, perform, you know, Jordan Peterson has a really good book about this, actually. It's just about fighting the dragon and getting your, get your milk. Uh, you know, it's like, look, I mean, just like, I mean, is the wide hip thing a myth? No, right? I know. Like birthing hips? Yeah.

that like is that some kind of weird eugenics myth or is that a real thing i think it's a real thing so i guess maybe big meaty tits are better at breastfeeding i don't imagine they're like all things being equal yeah probably yeah yeah i mean i imagine you got you got the framework there to fill up with milk unless you can't do it otherwise but it's like you know it's like are some people better suits you know better for baseball or basketball is lebron james like you know have an advantage in basketball sure yeah and this is these big mini tits also have an advantage um whatever i mean people like to get down on women who can do formula but you know no look sometimes it is really necessary like it's like if you're not

like produce i think women with twins a lot of the time like they don't produce enough milk or whatever one inch one inch yeah what what happens when you don't have twins do you alternate you want to you want to put twins on an omad diet like once a day for each of you well how does it work do you do you use both do you milk out of both you know i don't know how common it is to milk out milk out of both see i have no idea but they both can fill up right yeah we should we should really ideally we should get an expert on this on and talk to them yeah and like you know and they'll hang up in five minutes probably so what what uh oh so basically so Biden apparently is invoking the defense production act

to make baby formula oh okay google this please i almost sort of the headline i want to see if he's just you know senile again if he thinks this is going to like if he thinks this is the same thing as student loan forgiveness defense production had to boost baby formula manufacturing i just can't end badly can it it's going to put like gunpowder in a baby formula pleaded uranium baby formula. You got any factories there? I'm trying to find. Okay, the Defense Production Act gives the president

brought authority to require companies to prioritize the manufacture and allocation of goods in response to a crisis. I know what the defense production. I mean, what are they actually going to do, though? Okay, so Biden has directed Health and Human Services Department and the Department of Agriculture. You better tell me to survey.

to use aircraft from the defense department. What? What? To do what? To blow up the babies. This is like speed. It's like that movie. There's less babies.

Shoot the baby. What do you do? Then we're golden. No one can touch us. The baby is formula. There's not a formula. What do you do? Shoot the baby.

Not a good start. but okay, so he's directing them to use it. Just drain the fuel out of the bottle in the airplane. So what are they going to do? Were they going to airlift formula out of Canada or something? Okay, so they're going to use aircraft from the Defense Department to pick up infant formula from overseas. That's not the Defense Production Act. It's like the defense like pickup act.

I don't think they're going to seize like the good year tire plant or something and like start making baby formula. Yeah, I imagine them just, like, making their own baby formula, too. I mean, it might as well be Domino's pizza. Like, we're just picking it up. We're just invading other countries and stealing their formulas. Yeah, who's formula are we stealing? Which babies are going to go hungry? Because we're, honestly.

We're literally just starting big, like, milk farms of Iraqi women. Oh, God. Oh, no. I just, no, I mean, I just believe it could happen. and so they feel terrible. Right, yeah. But I assumed it was more like we're stealing someone else's baby formula. Like, you know, Sri Lanka.

Oh, yeah. We're definitely just raiding countries right now. This is going to be a problem. This is not going to help our image overseas if we start, like, starving foreign babies. Yeah. How is Abbott doing anything? Is Abbott, like, are they making new formula? Were they still trying to figure out how not the poison babies?

Okay, so that's what I'm kind of unclear on Because like, so some people are saying That the problem is like The FDA is being like bloated and too restrictive About like the kind of baby formula The let on the market But some people are saying Did they change it recently?

No, I think they've always kind of had these regulations And like people have had baby formula for decades. Yeah. All right. I mean like I'm maybe some of them are new. I don't know. But I don't think you become the monopoly by like, you know,

new, but being new. Right. But also, okay, so, but I've also heard some people saying that, like, Abbott is that, like, not a lot of, that they make different things. And, like, again, I'm not sure if this is true. But, like, that, like, a lot of these companies, baby formula actually makes up, like, a small percentage of their profits. So they're not, like, really, like, putting a move on, you know. Is baby formula not profitable? It probably is, right?

I mean, it's just corn syrup and a few, like, and, like, a few, like, Mederex bars ground up, probably. I mean, like... It's a liquefied cliff bars. Yeah. I mean, like, so I don't... Like, I don't... Like, you know, just...

Why do we have conglomerates? Why is, like, can't we just make that illegal? Why is this a company that makes switchblades also need to make baby... formula. Yeah. Why is a company that makes like, you know, electric, electrified fences for cows also

the company that makes a, you know, a binky, you know? It doesn't make sense. I get you want to diversify, but like, if you're not going to, what,

I mean, does that make any sense? What's the point of diversifying if you can ignore a part of your portfolio? We don't only make that much of money off this. So why did you buy it? Yeah. For the PR?

So when you drop a, like, when you're, when like, is it owned by like, you know, defense contractors? So it's like, you know, your bomb like blew up a hospital and like, you know, in Iran. And it's like, we also make baby formula. I just want to put that out there. We also feed little babies. So, yes, these babies died. But other babies, they didn't all right. I don't understand.

This is diversification, like. Disney owning every, I mean, I get that because they want to make Avengers that has, like, you know, the cat from the, the, the, push and boots in it. They want to get their rights to push and boots so they can put it in the Avengers. At least that makes sense. I don't know why this Abbott company is just, you know, who owns, who owns Abbott? Let's get to the bomb of this. It's like Watergate. Who owns Abbott?

Abbott Laboratories. What else do they do? Um, okay, so they have a bunch of subsidiaries. Satan? It's a multinational medical devices in health care company. They also own pediolite, insure, zone perfect. I drink pediolite after I'm really hung over and it, you know, hydrates you. We got a big bottle of pediolite.

I don't insure, right? Isn't it cornation? like part of this? Coronation Instant Breakfast? It might be. All right. So, I mean, these aren't like that diverse. It's not like, you know, we're not talking.

It's like baby stuff. I thought you were talking about like they made wrenches. These are all seem in the same vein. But why don't they make enough problems? Is the argument because they give it all the wick? But the government, those things are usually pretty good for the company, right? Yeah. No, they like, they're monopolies.

Yeah, I don't think that, I don't think companies like, you know, I don't, I don't I don't think the U.S. government has a record of screwing over corporations. Right. You know, like, you know, we'll get contracts. Right. All right. Well, I guess we spend enough time on this. I hope the babies live.

Yeah. We can't talk about this forever. I mean, should we maybe try and break into, this could be an opportunity for us. We could break into this market. Okay. You want to be the mother? Yeah.

Okay. Ma'am, hello. I'm sorry I'm at your door. I'm not a sex offender. I'm just here. I'm a salesman. I'm a salesman. Oh, oh, hi.

You could have led with that. I mean, you didn't have to, you're saying you're not a pedophile right up front of a little bit. I never used those words. I said sex offender. That's just, and that's just the first thing that crosses my mind when I're knocking the door. Well,

anyway, come on in. You invite me right in. Okay, well, I didn't even tell you what I'm doing here. I mean, you're salesman, right?

Yeah, you don't know what I'm selling. I'm selling like, you know, weird toys, sex toys. That's just bizarre. What if you're,

you know, one of your neighbors see me come in. Don't think, and they'll tell your husband. Well, what is this? The 1950 is like, well, might as well, because we are new, the first new, uh, baby formula company since the 1950s. Oh, wow. Yeah, it's a big deal.

That's really important. These scumbags, like I admit, they have a monopoly. They got these country by the balls. It's horrible. I actually, you know, it's hard to say, man, I'm trying to speak here. all right because they guys by the balls and they just

and they're like I'm trying to make a living here and they're just grinding me and I'm sweating all day knocking on doors all these pregnant women anyway what were you saying? I was going to say I use formula

and it's actually been very difficult to find recently right because because the scumbags is avid right yeah I don't know what that is but sure. They poison babies. We don't poison babies.

Oh, okay. What's your formula made from? Right. So, okay. I'm glad you asked. Do you like scallops? Scallops. Yes.

Now, you might think scallops are pretty expensive. Yeah, and also, you know, more adult food, but. Well, first of all, we wait until the scallops are a little older, and then they get a little musher. And then we put them in a blender. And then when you blend it up, all the germs go away.

Or the microbes. It's like an anti-biatic for food. I don't know if that's true. So we blend it up into a paste. Okay. And then we add like, you know, powdered milk and water. And then there's no corn syrup. But a lot of these formulas of corn syrup, we don't do that.

All right? Right. We pour, remember, ecto cooler? No, what is that? It was high sea, but it was from Ghostbusters. It was green. And I got, we found a whole shipping container full of that. We got it on a discount because they wouldn't let,

they wouldn't let them unload because of the pandemic. And we bought it. We swam up to bolt cutters and we cut them open. Anyway, we got those ecto cooler and we dump it into the vat. So it's scallops and then height, it's a little corn syrup, I guess. I lied about that. Powered milk But aren't

I'm pretty sure Baby's digestive systems Are not really advanced enough to Ma'am, are you listening It's why we blend it To absorb scallops We blend it I'm not trying to make your baby chew a scallop

I blend it I mush it up I mean do you want me to bite it with my teeth And spit it in your baby's mouth Is that what you want? Mom What kind of nutrients are in this Sea nutrients

Sea nutrients Nutrients of the ocean Water Salt Salt water I got to imagine some algae Reef

Maybe maybe the scallop eats A bit of reef Barrier reef Is that thing You know Probably a little plastic If I'm being honest I don't know what's out in the ocean anymore

I mean I just throw my garbage in the ocean so i can't imagine you know i'm sure you do too yeah uh well this seems like a pretty uh independent operation that you're running i got another guy um he's the one to put the money up for all that uh little scallops how exactly do you package it is it is it you know is it sealed is it we just get zip block bags but we buy the good ones that like they have the zipper thing so you don't have to like imagine if i was pressing little zip black old school zip lock bags And then it just goes everywhere.

Now, get the zipper thing. I mean, I bring it to you every week. It doesn't go bad. What happens if you put it in the microwave? God, you're nosy, aren't you? You, what, you're a cop? Well, put it in my mind. Yeah, do whatever you want.

If you want to make a soup for yourself, you're in scallop soup. Enjoy that. Why don't you enjoy that? Yeah, boil it. If you want to boil formula anyway? I think you'll do, actually. Oh, probably.

Yeah, yes, you do. Yeah, and you put the scallops on your skin to make sure it's not too hot for baby. I thought the scallops were blended. Yeah, but the scallop paste. What's the problem here? Okay, I'll take 20 cases. Damn right. Anyway, moving on.

Yeah, I think it could work. Me too. Scalops Your business I don't know if you picking it in the subtext But they were spoiled scallops And that was not going to be good for the baby It's good though

That was good marketing That you referred to them as more like mature scallops Right But they're poison Yeah I can't say for sure I think when things go You know when they

When they go past expiration date It's like gambling You might You know I mean I ate you know Rare meat You know rare steak And like, you know, as long as there's no coli there, I'm fine.

That's how I live. We spoke last, this is a quick one, we spoke last week about the, my Slovenian roots, Luca Donchik, don't chick, right? Decimated the Phoenix Suns. The Slovenian contingent is moving on into the NBA playoffs. They were fined 50K for some reason for dancing,

too loudly on the on the on the after they beat the sons that's one of the you know just there's a call back to last week lucca donchick is alive and well in the playoffs my my slum my Slovenian renaissance my my is it a renaissance you know my my Slovenian renaissance is in full bloom so that's one of the um Jordan Peterson's we mentioned them before so Jordan Peterson made a bit of news it was definitely news because I usually i don't hear about anything that's going on on twitter and this and this definitely came up through the pipes are there is there is anyone who listens to us who wouldn't know who jordan peterson is i don't think so could you like is there a quick uh like summation of who he is and in two

sentences he's uh he's a doctor he's a doctor he's a psychiatrist but not anymore right he's a He likes to talk a lot about Greek myths. And he likes to write listicles in book form, a book-length listicles. 12 rules for cooking your scallops. Yeah. He's gone through some... He talks a lot about mythology and witches and the Bible. And he had some setbacks over the past couple of years.

We don't have to get into it in Russia. I think he was for a while. Yeah. We all know the story. So he's doing better, is the point. And he's back on the, back on the mend, got his show. Back on the speaker circuit, I think. Good for him.

Make your money. We all got to make money. He's getting it on social media. Sports Illustrated releases their swimsuit edition. I guess they release the covers. You know, it's not that. You can't get it yet. You can't buy it yet, I don't think, and take it to your bathroom.

You got to wait for that. But they release this and there's a picture of this, you know, they have a few different ones. There's an old lady I'm just all right And then there's like a regular one You know hot girl probably right Yeah And then there's a girl who's got you know

A bit a bit more A bit more Cushing for the That's terrible right Cushin for the Pushing I mean that's just Yeah That's true

She's offensive It just feels like something I wouldn't want to say Yeah no Certainly There's some people who might affectionately call her chunky. Look, she's definitely overweight, more so than the last one they had. That was popular.

Ashley Graham. Yeah, they had Ashley Graham a few years back, and she was thicker. I mean, honestly, Ashley Graham may have been thicker, but she also had, like, giant tits. Like she is. Right. I'm not saying, I can't, I don't know. I'm not one of those guys who looks as a woman and goes, triple Cs, 36C, got it. I can't clock kids late.

I mean, I know some things are bigger than others. I noticed them, but I don't have that kind of visual acumen where I'm like, you know, Hunter. Right. Yeah. Yeah, for sure. But the point is this woman was definitely, you know, heavier than I think anyone in Sports Illustrated swimsuits ever been. To be fair. She's definitely part of a trend of, like, showing thicker women.

They were making a statement. I mean, they got the old lady on one of the variant covers. It's like a comic book. They got variant covers. Who was the old lady? I don't know. Like, you know, some fourth fucking, also old Nazi. They found an Argentina.

Ava Braun's sister. She was responsible for all the sexual torture at Bukkenwald. I really hope she wasn't like a Jewish woman. Oh, me too. No, I mean, only because of what we're saying. No, that's what I meant to. Chunky women, that's one thing, but Jews, that's going too far. No, so anyway.

Oh, shit, it was Elon Musk's mom. Wow. What's, oh, so, wait, she's, oh, isn't she like a South African, like, emerald mine, like, Harris? I guess. Oh, well, we weren't that far off, I guess. She's like an apartheid, Emerald Mine heiress. Oh, we're fine.

Yeah, no. We nailed it. Absolutely. All right, so that's weird. Did he just pay for that to happen some weird way? I guess. Okay. So cool, I guess.

Really, really weird. Didn't know that. But the other one, look, she's a heavier woman. Jordan Peterson, you know, responded. I guess they said, look at this beautiful, beautiful woman. Yeah, and she is, you know, beautiful woman. Look, she's got a gorgeous face. Look, she's got a nice tits.

Yeah, yeah, you have to, like, you know, cut her into, like, segments, like, you know, I mean, she's a beautiful woman. She has a beautiful complexion. Yeah. Overall. Yeah. Well, look, I mean, I feel like you're, you know, even though you mean, well, you're minimal. Like, don't fall into Peterson's trap. No, no, I'm just trying to say, like, it's like, you know, if we're just going by her physicality.

She has a lot to offer. She's got a lot to offer. All right. Now, but that being said, he's like, let's just, we're mincing words here. What did Pearson say? Do you remember? Oh, what was the exact quote tweet? Oh, oh, it was something like, I'm pretty sure I'm almost being verbatim here.

I don't think I even have to look it up. It was like, it was like, sorry, not beautiful. Yeah. Not beautiful. Not beautiful. And no amount of authoritarian tolerance will convince me otherwise, basically. Yes. Now, I look.

Now, he actually, what's interesting is. interesting about it because of course the left is going to hit him on it right but what was actually interesting about it was that a lot of his own like supporters and fans right we're replying going like my wife looks that looks like this i think she's beautiful come on dude um i'm trying to get her into you come on um you know do you want to show up to your six hundred dollar speaking of it or not right um yay at the howard johnson's yeah that's I mean, to be fair, it's the methadone clinic you go to. Look, I mean, do be fair, he was off base.

But like, there was, I mean, again, like, with the old woman, there was definitely, they weren't making a statement. They did, like, it wasn't like they were, there was, like, when he said authoritarian tolerance, I have some weird word for it, like, authoritarian tolerance. like authoritarian tolerance it's like uh that's not what he meant i don't think i mean he might think he's what he meant but that's not the right term for right but like i okay here here's what i'm going to argue yeah and i'd feel free to disagree but like sure i think the first time they did it it was a statement now i think it's a marketing strategy i think they know that that big

girls buy swimsuits and they want to get in on that market because why not like i don't think you have to do is like once a year put a bigger lady on the cover you know it's like that why not capitalize on that? Because I don't think anyone who buys that magazine is doing it to buy swimsuits I could be wrong

it's sports illustrated well look it's dual thing I think it's like dual this is just be handed out in the same way that the football phone was it was for it was for guys to you know to get away from their from their bitch wise

but it's twofold like it's like a it came with a subscription i got i got to say on the top of tom brady i got to make sure he's okay right i subscribe and then they send me this i want is it you don't just not porn i'm not a skump you're the scumb big look at you um he's just playing with football phone but I mean I know but like it's it's two things going on it's like it's like yeah obviously it's it's obvious how it's advertising to men most of the time

it's hot ladies it's just yeah it's soft core pornography is yeah it's softcore porn but it but it is also advertising to women like it's it's going like it's selling a certain like it's selling a certain beauty standard to women I don't think that's extreme

to say no I'm like on not too abstract level but look it's selling a standard to women like look this is what your husband beats off to right uh so if you want if you want to feel like a person you better look like this yeah but i don't know like i guess do they even i forget they even list like what's who makes the swimsuit they probably do i guess they definitely i think they do sell a lot of i don't know i guess i'm wrong i never i've never opened one i don't think oh i i i can't open it anymore because they know no i never i never understood the whole

into the magazine thing. Yeah. Like tissue. It's probably involuntary most of the time, right? What? It's just a frantic masturbating that leads to a cut to you coming on the pages. No. Or do you think some people like the idea of coming on the page?

Well, look, I mean, the whole like myth of it being sticky. I guess there's a benefit to that. But then, yeah, I mean, it's not, it's not exactly. It's not like you can grab it like a sock and just go, you know, um, I don't know. I feel like it's just kind of, it seems gross to me. Right. Look, if you go into the magazine, it's not, it's not a cup, right? It's not a sock.

It's not staying in the boundaries of the magazine, probably. So it's going to go all over, like, you know, all over the kitchen table. Right. Joke. Yeah, fair. The idea is that I mean, in the kitchen table. Yeah. This is not the part that I wanted to focus on.

The point is, uh, no, look, maybe they're selling the bigger. women but the way they posed there wasn't the most flattering and whatever I mean look point is either way they were trying to make a thing like the lizard like well you know there is no such thing as beauty and like look

whether or not girls kill do self harm because they see the hot redhead from you know Russian redhead girl remember I remember the freck the freckley redhead girl from sports illustrate you know that and it causes them self harm

well that's not good right I'm all for you know not bombarding you know normal looking girls like this is what you are if you're not you scum right I get it but that being said like you know yeah I don't look even when you take it into account I'm not sure what Pearson was trying to accomplish because like yes they are like they are trying to bombard us with like less you know like oh it's okay to be fat but like I don't know that like most Americans are like striving to be it's the evidence doesn't seem like we're all just like trying to be hot. Yeah, it doesn't

seem like we're really like striving towards a platonic ideal anymore, like of the human body. Right. Most of us, most of us eating like, you know, cheese balls. Those like air puff cheese balls and killing ourselves with the jelly donuts. And there's the hot people. I don't, yeah, I don't know

where Pearson falls into this, but there is a certain level of like, I see where it's coming from it. Doesn't mean I agree with them. Yeah. But and also it's like the guy, It is just the kind of rich coming from him Considering that a glass of apple cider It puts him in a coma

Right You know, like it gives him a seizure if he puts him apples It's a good point It's like maybe you're at the bastard of health dude Yeah, there's a middle ground here No no authoritarian tolerance will make me digest apples In a normal way But then he got really mad that everyone was mad at them

And he stormed off Twitter apparently he announced that he was getting off Twitter I'm gonna check now I think I I don't know what because I looked I looked him up and I'm pretty sure he was still tweeting this is uh let's see eight hours ago beyond I mean I don't know if other people are tweeting for him

but he did manage to tweet his Beyond Order playing cards are now available I think he's I think maybe his staff is tweeting for him now Maybe he just likes kids Museum defends men Dressed in women's lingerie playing Lego with kids Maybe he just likes kids I mean does he have his staff making witty quips

About the news I don't know that seems weird Exclamation point on some guy It seems like he's still on Twitter He made a big fucking announcement I'm telling my team to keep me off Twitter Yeah Is he Austrian? I don't know

So whatever. So, I mean, I'm glad this he's alive. You're not? No, no, look, I definitely don't want him dead. I mean, I want him to be alive. I would like him to be alive. I don't think he does as much harm as, like, getting out, look, regardless, even if you are doing it,

just because, like, you got ratioed for randomly calling a model ugly. Right. Like, it's like, any, look, I think any reason to get off Twitter is a fine one. He hasn't gotten off Twitter, as far as I can tell. But I don't think he's gotten off Twitter. No, it's fine. When someone says defiantly that they're quitting Twitter, right, they never do.

You know, it makes a point of that. It usually does mean they'll be back at some point. Yeah, like an hour. Yeah. Yeah, look, he's a weirdo. And I don't think he's the most harmful guy out there. I don't know if he's really that much of a gateway to, like, white supremacy or anything.

No, I think he's much weirder than that. Like I think that he is I mean I find the people Who take him super seriously and make a point to call him Dr. Peterson I find those people usually pretty creepy Right, but they'd be creepy anyway And I feel like if him telling you to clean your room

Help you That's fine. It's fine and probably did help him It's just you're probably not someone who was like In a great place to begin with Right And also I could clean my room If he was actually giving advice

of how to clean your room, I would buy the book because I'm a messy guy. I would love, you know, if he was like a new Marie condo or whatever, I could use some help on that front. I'm not, but like, you know. You're right. He is kind of a giant bait and switch. He keeps saying in your room and he never tells you how it's done. He teaches me about shelving.

Yeah. You know, I'll store my, like, little knick-knacks, you know? I really, I mean, and like, you know, hey, but when you, you know, make sure you, why, he's a tip. take the garbage out when it's halfway full. So you always have available space to throw your... So you just throw your garbage onto the kitchen counter out of frustration. I should write this book.

Right. Clean your... Actually, Ray Kump, actually clean your room. Oh, I mean, that first tip is like, you know, and that's something I don't... I just came over with the spot. We've talked about how we, like, you know... You're a little messy, too.

Yes. Not as bad as me. but how you know part of the problem is that we let the garbage get full and that's my new tip is that we empty the garbage when it's halfway full and so we always have space in the garbage can instead of just throwing it on the kitchen counter we might have to just throw it on the floor I'm a little bit of I'm a

I'm a problematic person but for all good reasons yes simple reasons 12 simple reasons. How else can I, you know, make money off this? So, yeah, that's coming soon. Should we try to get you on Sports Illustrated? I mean, look, if this woman, I mean, I guess people would argue that she's in better shaped than me, even though she's, you know, also overweight, but I'm more overweight.

But they seem to be saying it doesn't matter. Right. so yeah put me on the cover yeah also my man they don't seem to have men but whatever how much is a pay uh yeah yeah no good point how much you think it pays um google that i don't know google that i want to know and then we'll go how much they give you an itunes gift card how much i mean how many songs how much is swimsuit cover make cover model make six grand okay the median salary for sports illustrated swimsuit employee is uh about about 70k per 70k yeah for just to be in it at all yeah yeah i mean yeah i mean shame but not 70k shame

uh cool so you know you can reach out to whoever's that yeah totally like i'm gonna i'm basically going to pitch that it's you and like in a slick pair of swim trunks right uh and then in red ink uh painted on your chest is just going to say uh you know eat my dick dr peterson it'll be revolutionary all right but is it ink or is it blood uh we leave it up to the imagination but it's blood yeah i'm i'm gonna be a little embarrassed like that person with the Hill in the cab. You can use that. I can use the money.

All right. Thanks so much for tuning in. If you're, if you like this show, you can sign up for our Patreon. The links in the description. You get an extra episode every week for five bucks a month. I think it's a pretty good deal,

fair deal. And, you know, so if you sign up for that, you can see us in a few days. Otherwise, thanks for tuning. and we'll see you next week. Have a great week.