Kump - 146 - Garbage Patch Robots

Episode Date: April 22, 2023

Ray and Lucie discuss the Garbage Patch, NYPD robot dogs, and much more. Sign up at https://www.patreon.com/RayKump for an extra episode every week! Follow Kump on Twitch https://www.twitch.tv/raykump Kump Hand Merch https://bonfire.com/store/kump/ Follow Ray on Sound Cloud https://on.soundcloud.com/QbP8

Today on Kump, we have a checkmark purge, a garbage patch, and a robot dog. Stay tuned. Hello and welcome to Kump. Hello. Hello, Lucy. Hi. How are you? pretty good how are you enjoying this age of equality equality in what sense we have been living in a hierarchy

uh in twitter with these blue checks who've now been taken down a peg by mr musk on the day where his uh rocket failed to launch i guess or it launched it just blew up yeah they got it off the ground I think yes uh good for that I mean people like people are out there going you know you you loses who've never accomplished nothing you miscreants you scum of the earth this man launched a rocket so what if it blew up halfway through who cares and I agree yeah I mean I'd rather launch a rocket that blows up and kills a million people than succeed Lashing a rocket to blow it up, it has its own value. Sure.

Yeah. People don't know. He should just start saying that he wants them to blow up. Yeah. I would sit there and go, you know what? Why that rocket blew up? Because you're a bad kid. And I'll be talking to a small child.

You're a bad kid, a bad child. You didn't eat your mushrooms. You don't recycle enough. You don't recycle. You little rat kid. You look, what are you, five? That's no excuse. You, as you.

I'm looking down. I'm looking down under the camera. You little rat. You little scum rat child. You'd think you're better than me? I'm Alon Musk. I launched rockets and I had your parents killed. This is what I would say.

I would dress up like Santa Claus and tell children this. I mean, I would love, if I was the richest man in the world, you know what I would do? Destroy the world. You would destroy it? I would try to get it to destroy it. You'd be like, you'd do the Lex Luthor thing? No, I would do the, like, I would just try to get people to hate each other.

And then, like, and then, like, make friends with the Pentagon. Be like, hey, why just launch a missile? It kind of does seem like that is the playbook of rich people now. Like, like, get government contracts. Yeah. And then just troll people. Yeah. control poor people it wouldn't it be great we we have all these missiles these nuclear

what we use one what we doing and i'm getting kind of would you build yourself a bunker first do you remember how it was a bunker what i mean no i would just i build myself a bunker suit a suit i would build a some kind of if i was alon musk i would build some kind of robot suit that protected me from nuclear blasts i would spend 50 billion dollars on it I would just walk around all the time going, hey, I heard something. Yeah. I heard something today. You get like, you could get like a bunch of government contracts to just be like,

these suits will come in hand in the event of a nuclear apocalypse. These suits will save our people. But it's like, they're 50 billion a piece. But all the, you don't tell them 50 billion. That's just for one. Right. And then you'll just, what, go gallivanting around the post-apocalyptic landscape? No, no, I'll kill myself in the way.

I just, but I just want, because here's the idea. It can be a fake suit because like, I would just walk around in my $50 billion suit. But you have to, no, I would tell everyone it costs that much. Because I want them to know they can't get one.

And I would just walk around going in the suit, to be like, oh, Mr. Mr. Musk or Mr. Kump, I guess in this case. Why are you, why are you walking around in your nuclear suit? And I would go, I heard something. Heard something in the news.

And then I would just run away. Because they would have like really fast legs The suit And I would just run away really quick I would just be like I don't know And I would I would just say stuff like

China's too much of a Cowards New Gus I was trying to get him to do it I don't know I mean I would just be the worst person in the world I mean I understand a lot of must now

because I would just I would try to like start a world war but not like like you know tyrants i would just drugged people into it and i would be mean to children but i would never abuse them that's the thing all these rich elites who abused not me i would just be i'd be mean to them though because people who are like abused kids are nice to them a lot of the time right oh aren't you a lovely child diddle diddle dittle dittle i'd be the opposite i'd be like you're a rat get away from me screwball child get out of here yeah right I mean I can't I can't think of anything

that I like less the child smile just makes me sick just children playing bothering people asking questions you know you don't like it you don't like it where you see a two-year-old you know they make eye contact with you they take an interest in you oh my I've hurt my eyes immediately I'll grill I'll mean mug any son of a bitch in the world but i will look away from a child if it's on fire children are just idiots and they suck and i don't want to know any of them now we ever have a kid i'm sticking to my guns it's still gonna be me i'll i'll i'll support it i'll give it a violin say hey do something with this hey why don't you play this violin you idiot you know

Right. But you're not going to act like it's good when they play something. Stop screeching your violin. How many times have I told you? Well, you want lessons like a coward? Everything is cowards. Cowards and rats. Right.

Oh, you want a nuclear suit? Can't have one. I'm rich. What would you do if you executed this plan? I'm not going to do that. No, if you executed this plan to give a trial to violin, only to shame them for using it. Yeah.

But what if the kid actually was like a virtuoso or a prodigy? I sabotaged him. You did you sabotage him at every turn. I've never let my son or daughter outshine me. Never make any money at violins, will you? I would just, I mean, if it wasn't a child, if I would, let's just say I was in a competition. If I was an American Idol, I would, I would cut the Achilles

these tendons of violin players they have violin players on that show i would just i would i would i would i would i would i would i would i would i would praise satan oh the achilles that's great it's great because it's not even when you imagine like a player being sabotaged physically you imagine you imagine that they're going to be sabotaged using their hands or something that they need to play the violin in but you're just going to slice that achilles i mean they see i'm not a violinist a villainist but uh they seem to stand in a very specific way. Am I right? They have a pose.

Yeah, you're right. They probably do need to stand. And they stand very, like, deliberately. And I feel like if you cut their Achilles tendon, I mean, they'd spend years trying to get that center of gravity or whatever they're doing. I feel like, though, sometimes they are just kind of sitting down and they're just kind of resting their chin on the violin.

I have someone shoot them in the ass. And it makes them their chin look all fat. Like that goes. All right, fine, fine, cut the tendon shoot them in the ass. so they can't do either I'm adaptable I think on the fly too many ass I mean I will I will win at all costs or no costs succeed I'm a I mean I mean I can be nice though he's go take a teach to play basketball maybe sure yeah that could be cool that no mind anyway

Anyway, but yeah, so Twitter has, is that we're talking about Twitter? Yeah, Twitter of Elon Musk has purged the blue check mark. The blue check, so we, are you worried that you're, I mean, you're not, you're not kind of sad about this idea that you, you know, you have a very popular Twitter, but you don't have a big check mark. I mean, I wouldn't say have a very popular Twitter. I do, it's got 50-something, 53, whatever. Well, look, that's good. It is like, but you're not, you don't, you don't still want that, like, that moment in the future where you finally get the blue check mark. you don't less for that anymore well that's been gone forever though like that's been gone

they weren't going to make new blue check marks for the past six months oh it was it was only it's been an impending uh countdown to this and no i didn't care because i'm a punk rock boy i don't give a shit about blue checks um but yeah people are losing them stephen king he uh he tweeted something like i didn't because he had a whole controversy with uh with the Musk because he was like, $20 for a blue check mortgage to pay me, he tweeted months ago. And now he's tweeting today.

It says I have paid for Twitter Blue. I haven't paid for Twitter Blue. If you look on the thing now, it says like this person is verified because they paid for Twitter Blue and they provide the phone number. And he's like, I didn't pay for it. And I didn't provide a phone number.

I could kind of see Elon Musk lying about that. just posting a lie like that yeah no he probably just did it yeah he probably did just do it to fuck with him yeah that being said uh this guy famous that doesn't remember writing a child orgy that's true so i don't know maybe he did maybe he got drunk again and like maybe there's i mean if you know what's the movie it the book it it's all about children having sex to like oh it's like the demon the clown eats the children the only way to save yourself from the clown is to have an orgy it is convenient that it's like that he does not remember writing writing it specifically yeah apparently there is a lot of a lot of weird stuff with kids yeah i don't read

stephen king because i don't want to hurt children um but yeah so it's a whole new day now the blue checks are gone now it's only people who pay it's like it's like it's like Amsterdam with horrors hookers prostitutes prozies prozies that's what they call them an answer to them the red it's the red Twitter is blue but it should be red

because it's the red light district you got to pay to play you famously are not on Twitter I'm yeah I'm not on Twitter so it doesn't mean anything to you well it means something to me because I know it I know it affects people I care about who

yeah you I don't care it affects uh you know i don't care from verify i mean i might give a shit i'll verify myself with like you know i'll take a photo of myself with a newspaper and i'll pretend to be a hostage that's verification you know i'll just i mean i i will i will launch a campaign of sympathy for me by pretending to be a hostage and i'll cut my own toes off and send them to the newspapers give us the money but i won't provide the

dress and i'll just be a toless fingerless man and like they're killing me someone do something but no one provides us any information it'll be amazing imagine that imagine like this campaign of like free rate hump right but like no one's the hostage takers aren't providing any way of getting them back just keep cutting my toes off that's how you verify in this day and age do you think Do you think if NBC received your toes in the mail that they would, they would take it upon themselves to negotiate the hostage situation? I mean, I feel like they would probably, they would probably just forward it to the police, right? Look, I feel like it's kind of like the Zodiac thing. They send the Zodiac thing, the letters to San Francisco Cronkel or whatever, right?

I mean, I feel like if you send something to the news, they have to do something with it. Yeah, it probably strokes their ego a little bit. They don't want to just send it to the cops. They want to be the people who figured out the toe mystery. You're the caretip. Well, I mean, the cops have to get involved. They're not going to do it on their own, but they're going to have to, like, address it. And I'll say in these videos, I mean, NBC employee.

But I'm not. Right. But I'll say him and people will be confused. Yeah. They'll get toes. I mean, you don't think NBC would just throw my toes in the garbage? um well i you think someone there would start eating my toes you think it's some weird creep like like quitting tarantino who's films i love good guy do you start licking my toes

and show up for the newspaper i mean like i this is a guy i respect a lot whose films i like but they say he has a i mean he even admits to having a foot thing right not from i guess not my feet though. No, yeah, I don't think. I think it tends to be slender womanly feet. Okay. Well, I'm sure that I'm like, this guy miscalculated. I'm not going to like his feet.

I don't know why I want him to. I mean, you, wait, you, hold on, you think if I sent a separate plot, separate scheme. If I just cut off a toe and send it to Tarantino, it's a big fan. What happens? What do you think he? does I mean I heard you like what could happen what could possibly happen he could become my best friend yeah I heard you like these more this came from love kill bill by the way hmm what you think you think he you think he reaches

out I'll get my phone number do you text me maybe you you you I'm okay maybe if you wrapped if you wrap the bloody the toe and in a in a piece of paper no and Maybe you wrote a little note on there that said, I'll be your Leon Vitale. No one knows what that means. No one understands who referenced to Kubrick's right-hand man who was in Barry Lyndon. Some people might.

It might have a niche appeal. The man named Leon Vitale, if you've seen them film Barry Lyndon by Stanley Kubrick, which we've been watching all his films lately, we're watching them all. Stanley, he played the elder Lord Bullington, who has the duel with Barry Lyndon at the end of the movie. that man Leon Vitale was an accomplished actor to that point

quit acting and just became Kubrick's right-hand man for the rest of his life which is an interesting story and he made a little documentary called Film Worker not the best doc but I mean I'm a I'm just saying what shows more what shows more dedication quitting a pretty successful acting career but still really continuing to do acting and you're

role as Kubrick's right hand man or cutting your toe off whatever he did no he he accomplished something I'm a guy I'm a fat idiot cutting my toe off trying to meet Tarantino I mean look I love Tarantino he's not Kubrick I mean I think he'd admit that you'd have to admit that right yeah I won't be your Leon Vitale he'd probably get the reference right but you know he wouldn't I wouldn't feel right saying that but but yeah i wouldn't put it wrap in paper like an idiot i would get a clear nail polish and i would like get like a little i would fill it into a mold and i'm not sure how you harden nail polish i feel like if you can harden it so it's just kind of like a like a cube

by telling it get it like give it to them if i put this in your coffee like a sugar cube i don't know i mean i'd like to i'd like to me I think I think we'd be friends um we can talk about kirasawa movies and how I don't have a toe anymore you know stuff like that well this this is this is all very rational anyway I feel like you just you do it but I just think that you're I think you're expecting too much out of the toe well you out of the toe alone a man cuts off his toe and gives it to a another man isn't that a sign of love and deep respect i think that it is all right so what the fuck's wrong with this guy what was he's big he's big he's big ligging me he's giving me the high

hat tarantino if you're out there if you're watching this which you might you know six degrees of separation and all that what why you think it better than me my toes not enough what you want my dick my heart my lungs all of it every piece of organ material just shipped off to mr Quentin I hope he hears this I would love for him to hear this I'm a fan of his I love all his films me too reservoir dogs Pulp Fiction Jackie Brown Kill Bill Volume 1 Kill Bill Volume 2 Inglorious Bastards the Hateful 8 Django Unchained

I can't believe I can't believe you're gonna forget this other one The other one Which other one? I can't believe it I can't believe you got so far I can't believe you're gonna do death proof You're just

Jackie Brancourt Glorious bastards What were I missing? What do I miss? No the most recent one I was about to say it You cut me off in the middle You cut me off before I got to the last one

And you're like I can't believe You're forgetting this You're a saboteur Once upon time in Hollywood, you thought I forgot that? Well, yeah, you did. I was going in order. I might skip Django at one point, but I got to it. And you're going to sabotage me by, like, this is, who are you working for?

Elon Musk. Welcome to the show. What were we talking about? What we got out here? What's stories? we got um there's a story of a man not man what's this thing a garbage patch it's a garbage patch this is something lucy brought to the table she brings it's not the first time you bring many things to the table but i like i don't know much about

the garbage patch is a fake myth but apparently is a giant garbage pack way in the arctic ocean it's a great pacific garbage patch so it's an atlantic and it's grown to such a grower to such a size that it's you know it's kind of supporting its own ecosystem now what kind of garbage is in there you think stuff we have any of our garbages in there oh i think a lot of our garbage is in there i think that it's like about 25% are garbage i wonder if any of the stuff they got that when my my storage unit got sold off they probably threw most of it out there's a bunch of junk in there it was all everything A lot of it was junk.

What kind of stuff did you have in there? The old computer. I think there was a 12-inch robocop. Ooh, your 12-inch robocop might be on the garbage patch. Oh, wow. I missed that thing. It was pretty cool. It might be supporting life.

Don't do drugs. We say stuff like that. Wait, really? Yeah. Because there's Robocop too, I think. It was a whole about drugs. Do you think they were partnering with some kind of government thing? they could just say no thing yeah probably at the time they're probably partnered with nancy ragan

wrote robo cup too good old is nancy dead uh she is good riddens to bad rubbish i say to nancy ragan's whole family well i don't know they're liars didn't they put a lot of people in jail yeah i mean look i'm not a fan of the regans i just didn't expect you to go so hard on me i'm not right i mean i'm not like some blow hard liberal but i don't like reagan that guy was a thief and it was a cowboy sorry we lose half the audience because we should run nancy ragan how about nancy sinatra these boots are made for i hate that song why it just feels so like sad and desperate to me that like this woman's singing about like you know uh she's gonna put on her boots and walk all over

you know, her husband, who was, you know, who's just like some, you know, he is who he is. You're forgetting, you're losing the point. It's like these boots are made for walking, and so I'm going to walk all over you. No, I know what the message of the song is. I understand that, but I think that it's, it's, it's, it's, there's just a sad, pathetic irony to it, that it's like, I'm going to leave your dick in the garbage, you know? yeah yeah but she didn't like well we don't know i mean didn't didn't die part and shoot a man did she i don't know if she did that's great if she didn't let's start that yeah let's start that

dolly parton back in the 70s shot a man for grabbing her tit and i think that's okay anyway uh so what's up with this garbage patch uh the garbage patch this is the wrong story there we go there we go the great pacific garbage patch is so huge and permanent this guy just really has a hard on for the garbage patch that an ecosystem is thriving on it an ecosystem is driving on the go

i mean i'll listen to the article but here's my take off the bat everything's got on the ecosystem yeah you these people are talking a lot of shit you know if you put if i threw a saxophone to the ocean you have an ecosystem what's your point yeah i guess so i mean it's like yeah i guess like yeah if things are crawling on you you're an ecosystem if i threw a saxophone into your into a pool and and it had like poison side of it a bunch of people would die same idea go ahead scientists have found thriving communities of coastal creatures including tiny crabs and

anemones and what are those anemones anemones living thousands i don't know i didn't see finding memo right i didn't see that stupid movie but apparently there's something from that movie you didn't see finding a memo it was a long time ago but i did uh and apparently it was like isn't there a line which i have not seen the film there's a line where it's like we're With friends like these, who needs an enemies? Oh, yeah, that's clever. I guess.

I didn't see it. Go ahead. I smiled to your face. Living thousands of miles from their original home on plastic debris and the Great Pacific Garbage Patch, a 620,000 square mile swirl of trash in the ocean between California and Hawaii. I didn't know that it was that close to us. I thought it was more out there. Yeah, I thought it was, you know, China.

We could, like, visit the Great. Pacific that's our honeymoon we could go there for our honeymoon um kill by pirates I mean has anyone just tried as any human being just tried living on the garbage patch um I could think of a few people who should Nancy Reagan's son and his wife for one uh yeah that's it right in a new study published in nature it cut what Oh, no, go ahead. In Nature and Nature Ecology and Evolution Journal on Monday,

a team of researchers reveal that dozens of species of coastal and vertebrae organisms have been able to survive and reproduce on plastic garbage. This is the biggest nonsense. A plastic garbage that's been floating in the ocean for years. That should actually give us hope. Yeah, I mean, look, nature's fine.

You think nature, what do you think plastic is? It's oil, from bones, okay? I don't know, I'm not man of science, but I know what oil is. It's petrified bone that's been melted. Okay, just how you get oil? You melt bone over time, right?

And so therefore, what, oh, shrimp and caviar can't eat fucking dinosaur bones. They're fine. Yeah. Shut up, that's not causing any problems. Oh, what if the food you eat, eats plastic? I eat plastic. You almost like how often I eat like bits like I mean,

a slim gym, I'm just chewing like the label off to eat it. I don't try to, but I don't try not to either. I eat plenty of plastic. I'm going to die. Anyway. Yeah, I think that if you can live on it.

I think that if you can live on it and you can fuck on it, you're fine. they're fucking they're fucking the bugs are fucking the invertebrate organisms are fucking on the garbage we need someone maybe stormy daniels can go down there she's a porn star i mean a little pastor prime but whatever uh i mean how many porn stars of deep ball a president probably a lot really yeah you think she ever put the strap on on and and does the dirty dirty dittle to who oh oh oh like still like now They'll still get together.

Yeah. I mean, at this point, why not? Yeah, that's point. Like, yeah, why not just meet up? Honestly, that would probably be great. It would probably be a great time for both of them. If they could both be open-minded enough to be like, we're, you know. I don't know what's going on with these trials.

He could get off Scott three. And I know the articles I'm reading might be, you know, some more just inflated nonsense from the past six years. But I've read some articles where he's in a lot of, he's in more trouble than you might think. And if I'm him, I'm like, I got these millions of dollars. I might lose it all.

I'd give Stormy Daniels $5 billion to sleep with me again if I was him. Imagine if Donald Trump and Stormy Daniels got married. Oh my God. That would be a, that would be like, I mean, Shangri-La. I think I'd be open to making them.

I'd vote for them. Would you vote for a trouble? No, no, but I think I'd be open to making them or king and king. queen like what if trump and stormy daniels ran on a ticket together i'd vote for that no we should establish a monarchy like what they have in britain and make donald trump and stormy daniels he tried to it's january sixth our king and queen i mean that would be like keep the system we have now but just have like a symbolic monarchy yeah but they get i think that would make a lot of people happy i think that

would actually be an effective power. But that relies on, like, I mean, the king has, like, the power to pick the prime minister or something, or not really, right? I mean, not really, yeah. What happens if the king is, like, starts talking shit. Like, hey, you're not allowed to be prime minister. I get to veto you. They don't.

They have this thing over there. They don't. But Trump would do that. Trump probably would do that, but then, like, I don't know. I think that maybe the binary, look, I think that, I think the nice sides of being a king would keep him preoccupied. I don't think you would necessarily do that. Just hanging out with cancer kids,

whatever they do. Just living in a palace, like getting to sit. He's called a dump. He said, this is a real dump this place. Well, he's not going to live in the White House. We're going to have a palace for them. I know, but he's called that a dump.

He doesn't have gold toilet paper piss. He gets to have a sit-down with every incoming president. imagine it uh it's great so what's going on with the garbage patch um no go on anyway i call if you're no you're more whimsy about it no just i just like the idea of i think i think stormy daniels being there balances trump out i i really feel like he's a cop out because you don't want to vote for trump but i don't want to vote for him either but if it was if he if he ran with stormy Daniels I feel like it would be a ticket forget what he did before now you got of course they would win of course they would win an election together they're

Arthur and Guinevere yeah Maryland Row times two I'm just saying I think that the idea of that just having them win an election when an election almost undersells them and how and how powerful they could be I mean they wouldn't get nuclear codes I want him to have nuclear codes again what's wrong with this yeah okay look I'm yeah I'm down with I think even if he doesn't win we should give Trump the codes um why not yeah maybe who else would you give it to I mean here's my order Trump uh cream Abdul-jabbar and then um who's that guy like Tom Wilkinson I think it's British he's the actor he's in Michael Clayton this is my grand

Michael two Lithuanian cocks on my mouth I think the line is mouths on my cock is on my cock but my mouth works really well too fair point so the garbage patch isn't real it's fake news and whatever yeah it doesn't matter can we look at a picture of it though yeah bring you look it's kind of it's crazy looking it looks like a manatee why is wait wait that why does it look like the moon wait that's a garbage the garbage patches is a big dome yeah i thought it was i thought it was more flat yeah why is it why does it why does that happen what are we looking at here pretty strange is strange it's very odd uh any any more to add on this i don't think so

I'm done with this story. I hate this story. Credit Dumburg was in the news again. Yeah, I don't know for what, though. She was just yelling at like Jessica Chastain or something during some award show. Really? Yeah, she'd look it up at V-O-Mine. Yeah.

Honestly, she's such a sigh-up. Yeah, but for who? I don't know, just everybody. I think that she's actually in some ways, the fraudulence of the whole show, around her is I think on some level evidence that climate change is very real and that it's going to affect us because like if it wasn't they wouldn't send like a weird child yeah a living child propaganda post right i can picture like the mid 90s someone i mean like what if we

came over with a kid who could like convince people this is real and they built her in the lab and they said like and the kids all fucked up why didn't she was a real kid and like no it's a She's a robot. She's just a weird-looking robot. She's Megan. Oh, right. The robot killer girl. You got it?

Oh, wait, no. That was from 2019. Are you sure this is an old? Why don't you look at videos? It's a video? Yes. Oh, okay. Look at Red Thumburg.

Look it up. So good. what you got there um but wait jessica's testing don't she's happened to be there don't oh just just just just type in greta dumberg okay okay look at great you look at just gonna justine no i could type in grette thunberg jessica trustane where was she just look at dunberg newest you won't tell me where she was i don't know where she was she was just talking the younger people okay yeah whatever this is over I don't know it's not I'm not seeing anything get out get it off what you want me to do what you want me to do I don't know

just tell me where she was I don't know where she was she was she was in the room with a bunch of people a bunch of like weird celebrities Jessica Chastain was there while she was ranting about how you you will never have nice things because you want to fly around the world going to your favorite restaurants and you're and beaches and she talks like this and because Jessica's justine she's like yeah there was I do like that I mean I didn't make a movie that like fake Bid bin Laden raid and like you know and just took the CIA's money for not to not to not do that I didn't I didn't become a CIA shill to not go to a beach

You dumb, you dumb rat kid If I was I mean, Jessica Chastain would probably Beat their shit out of Greta Thumburg Oh yeah I mean just really I mean just in general She seems like a strong lady

And she could definitely I mean stronger than Greta Thumburg Yeah It's really What do you think You think she would give her an uppercut To her little chin Yeah

Probably right She probably just pull her Yeah I mean Pull her ears Just pull her by that braid Oh yeah You know And, like, pull her by her brain.

Just vertically, like. And then use her, and just, I mean, she's 2 over 18, though, right? I don't know. I don't know if we should really be saying this. No, this is what we said so far is fine. Yeah. And it wasn't anything sexual. It was more just about using, like, hitting her with dogs.

Why would you even say? I don't think anybody would have assumed that before you said it. I'm just saying. Greta Thunberg, I don't know. Why is there an oscilloscope on the second thing? Wait, hold on a second. There's this ad for an oscilloscope. A oscilloscope.

I'd love to get an oscilloscope. Next generation oscilloscope. What was the first generation of oscilloscope? I mean, it just measures like the frequency. of waveforms and stuff. Oh, okay. Or something. I don't know.

Welcome to the show. So we're done with the rat trap. You have a story about a robot dog, don't you? This is like a late night talk show. Yes. Haven't you have this? Welcome to tonight. Tonight show with Ray Kump.

I mean, we need to get me. They keep saying we need a person. of color or some woman of color to be the next late night host they need me yeah and you you can be an epic man or i'll be your epic man but i'll be your band leader yeah what you're gonna play the triangle oh you play guitar right um i play i play a little bit of a guitar but that's enough i won't play that though i'll play um i'll play one of those like a giant multi-tiered keyboards in organ yeah I have my little steam deck here. I'm like,

you have a story about a robot dog, huh? Yes, I do. Yes, I do, Ray. Thanks for asking. Let's go to the story about the robot dog. Oh, this isn't working. I forgot. That works.

Okay. Look at this thing. This is the MIPD robot dog. Yeah. Of years ago, I was seeing viral videos on the internet. from people out late at night filming robot dogs on their block oh really but before they were like officially released the Boston Dynamics dogs yeah in any official capacity but now now dynamic is like it's cyber dying if no one like did what they did in Terminator 2

which is not advocating for I'm just saying it's like if you went to Miles Dyson you were like hey you're responsible for like being nuclear war and he was like you want some almond milk no no no you you're responsible you you probably leave but i'll give you some almond milk and like this is no we're telling you you're responsible for like destroying the future and you pull a gun on you say i'm i'm the big i got the biggest dick in all of san francisco you just fucking started firing at you and choose on a kid and that's why we have robot dogs though i mean the robot dog it definitely feels like a thing of it from

Like that, you know, it definitely feels like it's predicting any future. The people get at my reference, it was terminator, too. You don't understand what I was just saying. It's the guy they shot. And remember Sarah? I think he got to get off his arm. And he's like, look, I'm a robot. He's like, oh, fuck.

I'm sorry. I'm responsible. Let me help destroy cyber debt. Dine or whatever it's called. Or sky net. I forget. But the point is, in my scenario, he doesn't. Do you look at that reference, you think?

I don't know. I think maybe some people will. All right, cool. Anyways, robot, though. Let's look at this. It's called Digidog. That's pretty cute. Like Digimon?

Yeah. I find nothing cute. Well, you probably shouldn't find this cute, to be honest. This is like the dog. It's the most disgusting robotic dog body and then the head of a snake. Look at this thing. It looks like, it looks like, it looks like, it looks like. Like if you just took a gun and you put legs on it and painted the yellow.

This is terrifying. Yeah, like the whole thing, the charm, I think, I feel like this is what people get wrong about technology all the time in reality. Is that like the thing that makes technology kind of digestible for people and pleasant and like, you know, is that when you call something a robot dog, it should look a little bit like a dog. Yeah. And like a cute dog, hopefully. Sony I used to go to the Sony show the trade show years ago and in Jersey for work and I remember in like it was like 2002 probably or three and they had like those robot dogs you know right yeah they're cute oh didn't do shit I don't know if I ever got one of those as a kid but I remember one of those little robot dogs I remember one so bad they made cheap versions that were a dog ship or poor kids.

Yeah. But I didn't have, but I didn't have either of those. But they had, the ones that Sony was like 300 bucks at least. And they were expensive. Anyway, I was eating crack crab.

They had a buffet there. I was eating crack crab. Crab legs. King crab legs. Like a king. You know? Yeah. And pasta.

Angel had pasta and crab. Delicious. Delicious. What? You don't think it sounds good? No, it just, it sounds great. Yeah. Yeah, this dog, I mean, what would you do if you saw this dog coming around your neighborhood?

What would you do if this dog? I shoot myself. What would you do if this dog started asking you questions? I would suck it dick. I would just start fucking suck it off. I mean, what would happen? If you try to suck it off, would it hurt you? Yeah, can you touch them?

Here's the thing, if you, if you tried to do that to a real dog, it would be like, it ain't going to let you, right, in various ways. Yeah. What would a robot dog do? What would a robot do dog do if you attacked it? What if you have, I mean, I would carry around water and just dump it on it? What if I dump a bunch of water on it? You know, it's weird?

These things, these things do you kind of feel like they're specifically designed to kill small children? Yeah. Like, because, like, that's what, that's who it would be the equivalent height of. Here's what you got, you got, you got, you got, you got to, you got, you got to, drop a bunch of coke in there, not even water, like syrupy soda or maybe honey. Oh, yeah. Yeah, just dump stuff on it, get in the gears. I mean, homeless people should do that.

If you're homeless and you're not sabotaging this robot dog, what the hell is wrong with you? Do we mention it's NYPD? It's the NYPD. Yeah, full your weight. Yeah, homeless people. Hey, you want to not be homeless anymore? How about you do things that make us like you? All right?

Don't just ask for money or a place to live or ask us how your kids are going to survive being homeless. We don't care. Sabotage a robot dog and then maybe someone will send you a GoPro camera or some other Chachky, which you could pawn off on the streets. Give the homeless people Chachkes. That's my new campaign. I don't want to cure homelessness. I just want to make it more accessorized. I want them to have

I mean give them the Google Glass but every homeless person should have Google Glass but all they see is themselves and motivates them not well that's mean so I should get one too if I had that I would also like work out more and run could be like oh wait how did they say

so the only thing they could see in the glasses yeah but they can't it's drilled their head nicely yeah and sweet way so it's just it's the sensation of constantly looking in the mirror yes that's pretty disturbing yeah that's this is a sci-fi movie yeah don't steal my idea i'm making this movie it's google glass but all you sees your wife having affairs i want to make a movie called the glass this is about google glass google i i know the way i talk i sound like i'm saying goo goo goo goo glass but it's google gogogoo go i can't say it

Google Glass. There we go. You realize what I have to flex like my abdominal muscles hard and get to just say Google. I really do. Maybe that's why I'm so fat. I don't talk properly.

Most people like actually enunciate and therefore burn calories. It's like oh, you know, the average person burns X amount of calories just by sitting. All right. Just being alive. I'm like, I don't because I just like,

I just like, I just like, I just like, I'm going to glass. You want to learn more about these robot dogs Sure New York City officials unveiled Three new high-tech policing devices Tuesday Including a robotic dog That critics called creepy

When it first joined the police back Two and a half years ago But now those critics are dead Who's laughing now? Now those critics have mysteriously died After receiving Poison Darts Weirdly in their calf region

This is great If like the only thing The Robot Dog does Is hunt down critics of the robot Oh man This is Kill them with poison darts This is the

This is 2002 with Space Odyssey This is what Kubrick is all about this is this is the monolith the new devices which also include a GPS tracker for stolen cars oh cool so it's the same like don't use a smartphone right he's the control with a

fucking app on Android and a cone-shaped security robot what? Oh yeah they have a cone oh there's a smart cone what if I sit on the cone I put myself in the ass of it. I'm saying, you know, yeah. Yeah.

Would you still love me? Would you look? If I, if I, look, here's a scenario. If I did that, right? Yeah. I was photographed and videotaped and became a huge new sting. I did it in two weeks. Right?

Right. I mean, the wedding would, it would be, like, the wedding is soon. Right. Yeah. A couple months. Yeah, about 60 days. Would that have an effect on the wedding, vis-a-vis your family? If I was known as the man who impelled his ass on the...

Like, how famous are you? Are there updates about your life? Like, man, man who was famously... I will be... Penetrated by a police smart company. I will be a news cycle. Less than a week usually, but I'll be on the news cycle for at least a week. Right, but enough that they'd see it.

Oh, yeah. I think that I think my family members are very polite I think they would try I think they would want you to be able to get past it with dignity what if I burn up during my vows you are the light of my life when I impelled my ass on that robot dog

all I could think was this feels amazing but I love Lucy anyway it's a lover this is better than anything I've ever felt but I love Lucy as a person with that as a friend not as a friend as a person you make you make it more ambiguous right no if you say as a friend then that's an insult I said I love you I love your I love your soul but this

cone loves my whole I mean what then we still get married I'm game I mean I Look, I don't think I could deal with being married to you When you're constantly comparing Basically, basically my sexual prowess To that of a smart police code I don't, I don't think, I think that maybe would be a hard line for me I, I can't believe you're saying this I don't marry you

I, you know, like I It's not an attack on you It's just my own weird proclivities It's my own piccadillos If you can't deal with that, I won't do it, because I do love you. Look, you're a man of many fancies. I feel like you're mocking me.

No. Anyway, what's the ones up with this dog? Tell me more about the dog. The new devices will be rolled out in a manner that is, quote, transparent, consistent, and always done in close collaboration with the people we serve. said police commissioner Keishant Sewell who joined Mayor Eric Adams

and other officials at a Times Square press conference where the security robot and the mechanical K-9 nickname Digidog were displayed It's terrible Anyway Digidog is out of the pounds At Adams

These people are crazy They're out of minds Just try to make it look a little bit like a dog They couldn't have just like stapled some fur to it Here's the rule I remember when when Chomsky was talking about 9-11 The Post when like we went into Afghanistan He's like oh technically the U.S. government said

Give us bin Laden and we won't attack you and they didn't But we don't want them to because a mob boss doesn't want to ask permission And the same way They don't want to look like a dog right you get it you get my analogy yeah yeah they want you to know they want it to be a dog perfectly designed from a nightmare yeah right look they look they want you to jump off a building and i'll oblige i oblige them apparently there's a new COVID variant he's a pink eye oh really i just read some of them on twitter i don't know if people are making

this stuff up or not but like there was something like someone was like why there a new COVID variant and Musk was like I know right his responses are also lame yeah but uh and someone like took a picture of that and said there is a new variant cause pink eye look up look up look up COVID pink eye look up look up COVID pink eye what the COVID pink eye can COVID-19 cause itchy eyes or pink eye let's see all right the latest COVID-19 sub-variant XB-B-116 not only appears to be more contagious than other sub-variants but it also causes a symptom not previously associated with the coronavirus red

itchy eyes. The Subvarian, also known as Arcturus, has been identified in 29 countries. It's, you got to wash your hands. Remember everyone I was telling you to wash your hands? Stop shitting on your hands. Do you think there were just some, like, they are confusing this for coronavirus because there are just some stubborn people.

Because this corona is like a thing with the eye, right? Yeah. Like out of protest for the lockdowns just like stopped wiping, washing their hands after they're just. person was like oh you usually tell people and now they have COVID and perpetual pink eye this person like wear your mask again wear your mask put your mask back on like a pink guy they pick doesn't cover the eyes you know yeah can't you can't protect those eyes what is this china police station thing I meant what you focus on one thing we've talked for things for half an hour

are you talking about do you make this full screens so I can hit my buttons. This is a video or what are we doing here? DOJ accuses China of using police station at Manhattan to spy on dissidents inside U.S. What they have a little periscope, a little fucking cold they live in? What is this?

The FBI on Monday reveal what it said is evidence of expanding espionage and security activity by the Chinese government on U.S. soil, including in lower Manhattan. See, I'm a good reader. Yeah. The Justice Department announced three cases suggesting more brazen activity by China inside the U.S. in the wake of the spy balloon controversy.

The screen is far away. I can't really see it. I can read. One case involves Chinese security officials allegedly spying on Zoom calls and then harassing Chinese distant person participants participants what's going I was a weird thing when I read I don't retain anything what I just say what they're they're spying there they're there somewhere in lower Manhattan spying on people over zoom and I guess there's something well I have brain gangster because I feel like it takes me such concentration to read properly that when I do it

I don't actually understand what I'm saying do you think I have a Humor in my head? Maybe. You say it's so glibly. Ten Chinese officials were charged with conspiracy. Ten Chinese officials were charged with conspiracy along with an employee of a telecommunications company. Sources told ABC News the company was Zoom, and the insider from China allegedly was able to disrupt meetings on Zoom. This is some kids who's like hacking these Zoom calls.

And this is China. Another of the cases involves Chinese security officials allegedly setting up a police station, quote-unquote, in New York City and using it as a base of operations. It's not a real police station. This article sucks. I'm done with this story. I mean, I just realized this article is full of shit. You know what? You're totally right.

I also was imagining them, like, having a whole fake police station and pretending to be cops. Yeah, this is just like. Which doesn't really make sense. No spying works like that. Yeah. I don't know what this is. We'll end with this, I guess. There's a baseball boy.

What? What's so funny? Yeah, I don't know. Do you think I'm acting strange today? You're acting pretty, you're acting strange, but it's cute. Cute. It's cute. I like it.

I'm trying to cut my toe off. Pitcher criticizes MLB teams for extending alcohol sales so we have these peat these uh these basically the tradition is that after the seventh inning or once a seven thing in baseball you have nine anythings remember that in baseball you have nine innings okay the top of the bottom you pitch you hit you pitch you hit you pitch you hit right and then this nine of those and the seventh one you can't get beer anymore that's how it works typically and now they're saying screw that we don't care if people get bucking the shit-faced, you know, plastered, head of kid.

Sell all the beer. And this pitcher, read some of the story, please. This pitcher's not having it. A pitcher with the Philadelphia Phillies is criticizing some Major League Baseball teams for extending alcohol sales with games running around 30 minutes shorter due to the sports new pitch clock. Which I'm a fan of if you don't remember from a couple of episodes. People got real man on TikTok.

for that thing I posted about me. Oh, yeah. Not like, you know, they thought it was a real moron. They called baseball a game of, what they call it a mind game? Yeah, cerebral. It's a re-serebral. It's a game for intelligent people or something, which is not. No, it is.

I like baseball, but it's not a game for intelligent people. No, more than any sport. No. I feel like I actually like it mostly because it's very slow and easy to follow. Yeah, it's like, oh, got hit a ball. Cool. Now, I know people listen to who play baseball, right? Hello to baseball pitchers.

Pitchers seem to like me sometimes. I don't know why. They like you because you nag them. I do neg them. I'm an insult to pitchers. I'm a pickup artist for pitchers. Anyway, go on. Matt Stram said Thursday,

on the baseball isn't boring podcast i mean the fact you have to say that it is i mean i like i watched the first nine games of the season for the mess and then i stop why got him boring yeah i got bored whatever i mean really but i do watch it but it's boring yeah go on uh he said on that on the baseball isn't boring podcast the team should be moving to cut off the beer sales uh uh up to the sixth inning rather than stretching to the eighth or later since fans will have less time to sober up and drive home. I mean, that's actually kind of a wholesome reason

to not to take issue with something. You're concerned about drunk driving. But that is why the rule was there. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I mean, because he's in Philly. I thought maybe they just didn't want to make money. I was having trouble understanding it.

I was like, well, you don't want to. I thought maybe they had problems with fans getting super drunk and throwing stuff. Well, that's who? the people that's also part of it he's who he didn't get throwing it at yeah he's in philly i mean i love philly i've ever been to philly but i like the idea of philly oh right yeah but i think philly's uh not the least rowdy people right philly knows who they are you know i admire that i like a rowdy team a rowdy bunch of fans it's like it's like it's like um the great uh ty cobb

said he's beating a man a handicapped man is he's he's sort of beating the shit that is handicapped man. I forget who's talking on shit. Yeah. And the top cop, that man has no, uh, no legs or something. And he's like, I don't care if he has no hands. He kept beating them. Um,

you, you take Ty Cobb's side on that, right? I mean, the guy was a mom. I mean, like, the guy in the wheelchair was kind of a piece of shit. Yeah, you can't just talk shit because you're getting your wheelchair. What do you think? You get to rule the world because you're, you don't have legs? No. That man's an athlete.

Ty Cobb's an athlete. Ty Cob wasn't a, was he a racist? I don't know. I heard he wasn't. There's some suggestion that his, like, that his reputation may have been exaggerated by, by this biographer who basically wanted to slander him. Yeah, I heard he's actually, like, really supportive of, like, black guys. Yeah, I mean, look, I would, like,

I didn't say. I did, though. I heard that. I don't know if we, you know. I'm not making the claim. If you're a black man living in America, I'm not saying to you, hey, your lived experience doesn't matter. Ty Cobb is awesome.

I don't know. I'm just saying I heard things. What does that mean even to really like black men? Is that what you said? No, he used help. I don't know. I forget what they said. But he's like black players or something.

Oh, oh. I mean, if he did, then that is a real character, assassinations. He might not, though, but I forget. I always kind of came down on the side of, like, maybe he wasn't, like, not racist for the time. Yeah. But, but he didn't, like,

murder people. He wasn't in the clan. Yeah. Maybe, I don't know. But we don't know. I think he's accused of murdering people. I didn't get a gun. I don't know what that means. What? He had a gun. Anyway, any more of the story? I don't know.

um the reason we stopped in the seventh before was to give our fans time to sober up and drive home safe correct correct am i right such a such a picture move correct like you try like i i would just i would disagree from you'd be him you be him uh i mean the reason we uh want to give our fans time to sober up as so they can drive home safe correct what my train seal i'm i'm gonna answer your prompt go pitch to a fucking trash can i'll get i'll get home and drive drive drive trying to your house try to try to get to your home what you think of that

you're gonna catch that pitch I just wanted I was just asking if you think that's a correct assessment how how fast you pitch how fast you pitch I've been known to pitch 100 miles per hour I'll drive that fast into your living room

with a car I'm gonna look at that try to make me make me the fool go to hell no hell anyway so now with a faster-paced game and me just being a man of common sense

if I you know what I'm starting to realize you're right about in your assessment here yeah right it's just common sense if the game is going to finish quicker but we now move to be ourselves back to the six city to give our fans time to so we're up and drive home this is I'm a great judge of character

I know I talk about nonsense and I'm all over the place but I'm a great judge of character this guy is being a jerk he's probably a fan of mine i like he's pitching look we'll still go if you want to invite us to a philly's game you know sure that'll be your mea culpa for being like that otherwise i'm i'm not going to let these athletes just because they adore me while you know walk all over me anyway it just does seem out of nowhere like what do you think on some level is like he just doesn't like the pitch clock yeah he's trying to it's trying to paint this picture of like all of these things

have to change now because of the pitch clock yeah he's just he's just mad because like you know he doesn't get to you know take it like rub his balls in between pitches whatever he does sick of it just pitch the ball throw the ball anyway thanks so much for tuning in if you love the show as much as you should you can check out our patreon at patreon.com slash ray cump where you get an extra episode every week for five bucks a month that seems like a pretty good deal Yeah, I would take that deal. I would take that deal in a heartbeat. I would also send my total of Quentin Tarantino in a heartbeat.

Otherwise, just like and subscribe here that helps us out. You know, on YouTube or wherever, just like us. Subscribe. Help us. Anyway, thanks for tuning in. Have a great week. Thank you.