Kump - Ep. 199 How To Meet Women

Episode Date: January 24, 2025

Ray and Lucie discuss Ray’s ideas for prisons, picking up chicks, solving the homelessness crisis, and much more. Sign up at https://www.patreon.com/RayKump for an extra episode every week! Follow Kump on Twitch https://www.twitch.tv/raykump Kump Hand Merch https://bonfire.com/store/kump/ Follow Ray on Sound Cloud https://on.soundcloud.com/QbP8

Hello and welcome to comp. Hello. Well, Lucy. Hi. How are you? I'm doing good. You're looking great. Thank you so much.

My drip is continuing to thrive and is the new account. economy and it's golden age the golden age of drip as i'd like to call it uh everyone's doing quite well and uh it's kind of like you know you're here the packs for umana in rome sure yeah it's it's it's just like that it's just it's just what is the do you feel it i feel like you know it's just like a lot of like i'm not getting by a lion um whatever it's roman it's hard to connect with you when you're wearing those things. Yeah, I mean, it's really ruining our marriage. It's hard to see you as human, even.

I'm more machine than human now, even though they're not, you know. I would love to get, like, my eyes replaced with a visor and, like, just, I have to deal with, like, contact lenses or my eyes in general. Like that X-Man. I don't know what you're talking about. Who's that X-Man? Wolverine. X-Man with the visor.

Beast. The Beast, the genius beast. Cyclops I never heard of Cyclops Never heard of Cyclops Never heard of them Anyway You know we had a fun

Fun night last night We were at a birthday party Oh amazing party And you know We really We talked to a lot of different people We think of the bar kind of setting And people out there

I feel like the youth Aren't taught how to You know mingle at a party I think it's part of the problem Everyone was just like, you know, especially with COVID and just, you know, being kind of self-absorbed narcissists. Made everyone really, yeah, autistic. Everyone knows how to go out and meet people and engage, you know, in small talk. But I thought maybe I could share, I'm not going to hoard all the knowledge.

I have a tip that I am, but, you know, we implemented quite, I think, well last night. Splendidly. And, uh, I mean, it went great. I enjoyed it. I mean, some of people might say it was. grotesque and uh you know kind of deeply immoral disrespectful sure what do i care i so but try this here's the thing manipulative okay i'll take it it's not look you can't you do this in a mean way you can't do it an evil way i'm i won't endorse that but go into a social setting and just try to get

something going and by something i mean like a rumor trying to get it circulating around the room yeah i mean not about something that like someone there right so just nothing balls you want i am i am i uh teasing too much here's the deal think about this in hypothetically if you run into somebody and they go hey how you doing how you been you go oh i'm great did you hear about brony james what do you mean brony james he shot himself Oh, my God.

And here's a problem. Someone go, wait, really? And you go, you have to go, yeah. And you go, and you go, where is it? I don't see that. And you go, you have to go, someone on the street told me. Because, you know, I don't have it. I can't, like, where's the age your smartphone?

Or the way you, or the way you phrased it. Some guy was yelling it on the street. Right. Which made it, I think it hurt the believability of it. But I anticipated the problem is that people immediately pull out their cell phone. Right. Not everyone, though. Some people are very trusting.

Sure. And those people, you know, that was, you know, that was, we had a great conversation then. But, you know, here's why, like, these technologies kind of ruining America. It's because you can't get something going, even for a short term, you know, just kind of to lobe up the social interactions, right? Yeah. You know, because people are like, oh, my God. And they start checking their phones and, you know, and you have to be like, oh, is he alive? That's great.

they'll be like they'll drill you and be like well my my phone's dead and a couple people their phone was dead too but yeah i mean it's a great icebreaker did you hear what johnny brunny james did and no one's expecting you to say you know he unalived himself and this is awful i mean he's fine he's not going to you don't pick someone who's like you're depressed sad person they don't it wouldn't be fun then because he's a star athlete he may not be the cream of the crop like his dad but he's doing fine in the lottery of life. You know, it doesn't mean spread awful rumors about him. Yeah, his life is not going to be destroyed by somebody thinking he shot himself for, you know, for a night.

Look, part of, look, you can't lie about what people do, right? I mean, that's something they did. But, I mean, like, you know, you can't say he did X, Y, and Z, something illegal. That's wrong. You don't slander these people. But, I mean, part of being part of the aristocracy of America is, you know, some people can kind of, you know, have fun with your personality. That's spreading a rumor that Brony James killed himself.

Well. It's just having a little fun with his personality. I think he'd laugh. I think he'd think it was funny. He's like, you know, I think he would be like, you know, this guy gets it. It's also the kind of thing where I feel like that, that it shows, it actually elicist. Maturity. It shows maturity.

It shows maturity. your part and it elicid sympathy right for brawny jams we should pay more it actually helps his brand because people who might not have even thought about brony james because he's stuck in the g league yeah for one moment cared deeply about him and his drama

he's in there in the g league which is the lower league they dumped them in i'm just bringing awareness back you know um and you know people out there go i don't know anything about basketball i can't do this comp i mean you could pick uh you know some kind of other, you know, star, like a star trapeze artist

or maybe Yo-Yo Ma. Shot himself. The famous cellist, Yo-Yo-Yo-ma. I mean, the chess champion. Yeah, but what's beautiful about Brani Jam, about it being Bronny James? He's so virile. And so it's like, why would he do that?

You could see, like, Yo-Yo Ma doing it because he's just kind of like, you know, he's like old pent up, like, oh, maybe not. Maybe he might be a lovely man. I've never met him. I'm sorry. he doesn't stop by the diner. I need a burger with me.

Yo-Yo Ma. But also, Yo-Yo Ma doesn't seem like the kind of person to really question being alive. Like, he doesn't seem like the kind of person who would be driven to suicide in that way. But... I don't know that most people who are convinced to do that or do it because of questions.

Are you picturing people just like existential questions that don't get the answer? Do you know, might as well just end it? Is God real? I, who could know? Bye. I think it's more like, you know, sadness and pain. But yeah, I see you.

I get a point, kind of. But Brony James, there's almost a built-in, there's a built-in rationale for it. Right, because he's not as good. Not that I think he should do it. No, it would be a silly reason to do it. Yeah. But, I mean, he's not as good as basketball is that.

And it's like, who's going to leave him all's money anyway? So it has more of a narrative arc. Yeah, it's more tragic. It's more like, it would be. be uh look at lebron james wants to be the goat this is part of it you know people accuse michael jordan of getting his dad killed it's not i don't endorse that oh he's gambling debts the man's worth like five hundred million dollars i'm sure he could pay his gambling debts but everyone everyone said that michael jordan's dad got killed because of his gambling debts you want to be the goat

this is goat territory people people just making weird stuff up and it's fine i'm being out you know I'm not saying, you know, if this started, if I succeeded in this, like, spread and became like a news story, I would try to stop it. I'm not a bad person, you know? Right. Yeah, you would come out and take the, you would announce that it was, that you would start. Is it a crime? If it's a crime, I wouldn't. I don't know.

I don't think it's a crime. Would I get in trouble? Does that count as slander to say that somebody killed themselves? I mean, I think the best proof of, no, I don't know. I'm not really a lawyer. I'm just a paralegal. But, you know, it's a great icebreaker. And think of it this way.

You're sitting there alone in your, you know, parents' house or your bad apartment that smells. And you can't meet people. And every time someone from work invites you and you just, you bring up the election. they invite you at some bar and you just talk about Trump or Biden Kamala yeah her

you go well what do you think about this and they go this is you're a turd you stop being a turd contribute something imagine if you were like you remember remember the show uh

Clarissa explains it all a Nickelodeon she's dead and they go, well, what? You know, no, it's not. But now you got, it's like, it's like, it's like exercising. Right. Yeah, and then sometimes you can choose to let somebody in on the plan.

Right. You can, you can pick someone up, almost like you're in a, you know, a multi-level marketing scan or something. Maybe you, maybe you can spread this rumor to a few people. Maybe you can lie about a disease. Do the new pox? And you hear about the new pox? The fish pox.

with a fish pox disease right fish the fish virus oh no i haven't heard about the it's like the monkey it's like the monkey pox or the or the covid oh those look horrible yeah those lums that people get on their arms yeah you're gonna be dead soon you're your kids you know and that's like that's honestly you made you think i'm being joke but like people like to go to scary movies they like to go on roller coasters they like it when people pick them up metaphorically and shake them a little bit that's what being a great man is it's shaking people up a little bit you know it's bringing people to the edge safely and then making them feel a little danger but also like you know your hands on their back and you're and you're and you're nuzzling them you have to it takes a lot of you know

you have to cover a lot of angles this is what the left doesn't get you know the left doesn't have a back rub you need that you need the political left i mean they're all about you know money and we want more money we want you know let us have don't cure our cancer and it's like you need someone just come out and just say look Clarissa is just you know oh no the pox we're on the pox now you use a pox is going to kill you and um it's you know you can get it from water just a fish box any kind of water any water not

not even if I filter it or oil it there's water there's a whole water I don't remember the whole water cycle from science class but there's a whole thing where it comes and it goes and you know it goes into the atmosphere it vaporizes so rain can kill you and then you know and you just spread these

and like you and you kind of convince someone this is how you get a date this is how you get a woman all right this is how you get a woman to like you. You make her... Because look, if you're really clever, you can kind of be more like chide her looks. It's chide her word?

You can neck... That sounds like the 1920s version of nagging. Well, it's like, look, these pickup barters guys always take it too far, right? To find a wife, you must chide the woman's look. Well, look, it's intuitive, right? And these pickup barters have grifters. And they don't understand.

Like, there's a whole... You know, in order to, like, make fun of a woman's looks, you have to kind of be pretty, like, sharp and on the, on, yeah, and freewheeling. Like, hey, your, your hair is ugly, um, or something. You know, I love your face, but your hair is just, smells like piss. Makes me want to vomit. Right. I mean, I would never have sex with you unless he paid me, uh, or something.

Yeah, whatever, you know, how much, you go, I don't know, a couple of bucks. I wouldn't have sex with you unless you shaved your head. I mean, what? want me to shave your head you're going to have to pay me right what would honestly was that it's not bad right like if i came up to you and i said and i said and i didn't know you i was like look not for nothing lady you're not horrible looking but i wouldn't have sex even unless you paid me would you ask how much i i guess yeah i might be curious how much yeah like how much how much would it cost probably like three to five hundred bucks depending on what you want

I mean it shows a lot of confidence right I think that shows like a I think it's a healthy amount of confidence to show a woman like that I'm worth it like I may not be the best looking guy but I know what my sex is worth I'm worth $300 to fuck me

and $500 to play with my ass while you fuck me wow that's that's the that's the range yeah the range of experience yeah if you want if you want to put things in my ass while you fuck you then uh it's because going to cost more just putting it out there full disclosure because i know we live in a me too kind of world you know where like people can get you know things confused and i don't want that at all

i want a complete lack of confusion when it comes to my sexual conquest you want right okay yeah i want my sexual conquest to be very above board yeah i mean that's the best evidence that you can rape somebody right that they paid you money yeah oh my god i mean i imagine imagine someone accusing you Well, I'm sorry, is a VEMO and the comment says for sex. Can you tell me, Judge, what happened? It seems like I'm a prostitute. She's my John. Case closed.

I mean, you've never heard of a case like that, hence the need for it. If you've never heard of something, it means it needs to exist. That's a general rule of a principle, right? So, yeah, you go and you tell someone, like, your kids will be dead soon because of the rain or whatever, and then they feel better, right? You go, I'm kidding. They go, oh, okay. And they'll go, you never know. They'll say something like, these days, who knows if it's true?

I used to maybe would think you were lying, but now, who knows? They say stuff like that, right? They're always like, in this day and age, who can know what's real or fake? They love to say that. And so you give them the opportunity to say that and feel good about themselves. And you laugh at that, and you go, ha, ha, ha, good one. And then now the center of attention

is you and now you've shifted the the axis of power i should really not be giving us away for free on the youtube it's you only going on a patreon patreon.com slash ray comp shameless plug you get an extra episode every week if you sign up if you're not going to do that at least like and subscribe to show all right i'm giving you i'm giving away the gold here so basically this like and subscribe comp do it now you you so create so conflict so so crisis in the mind of the people that's my point it's got to be a little crisis right people people like these fucking guys these goons on the internet who everyone gets mad at and they go oh women just don't want to like i guess hard out there but sometimes there's requires a little finesse right you don't go like hey nice

to meet you you're dead like you know you can be dead so you don't lead with that but you just go ahead you hear about this virus that women like you were getting you know women like if she's a blonde woman you say I heard so you're okay I heard about this blonde this blonde this blonde uh this guy who goes around killing blonde women something like that right I was gonna make sure you're okay and like what are you talking about I don't know there's some guy who's like in this area who like kills people who look like were you like 5-8 yeah that's the kind of yeah that's the range So glad you know, I guess you haven't gotten attacked yet, but he's out there. And then she'll be like, what are you talking about?

And she'll her boyfriend will come over and go, no, I was just kidding. I was kidding about that. So you can always just go back. But like, if you bring up politics, people have very deep-rooted feelings about politics, right? And so what I hear about, you go, oh, Trump, and you can't convince anyone. But no, people don't really have strong feelings about that, like a guy who kills blind. They don't like it. No one's happy about it.

But they're not like, it's interesting. If I told you that you wouldn't be triggered by it. But if I said, you know, I voted for J.D. Vance. People lose their minds. Right? But like I say, the man killing blonde women who look just like you. And you go, oh, that's interesting. That's how you date women.

But you have to be, you have to tell them the truth. You can't just keep the lie going. That's not what I'm advocating for just deception. When do you think you reveal that you were lying about the disease? over a drink you say let's get a drink and we'll talk about it and then you go by the way I'm not this wasn't real but I'm not saying you sleep with her first and then you like you know that'd be that'd be wrong to sleep with a woman because you tricked her into thinking she has AIDS or something that's crazy who would do that I mean imagine like just convincing a woman she has disease

and control her that's not what I'm doing here it's just about it's a fine line don't use these tips if you can't handle them if you're going to be weird about it you know i'm trying to help men but use them responsibly i'm putting myself out there with my tool toolbox of the tips don't make me look bad how do you feel about using magic um the use of magic well like well like that's that the dust that you blow in that they blow in the women's uh into their face and they and they lose there's a drug that makes women forget who they are. It was on like internet documentaries back in the day. Wait, that makes women forget who they are?

It was like some South American country, and it would blow dust in your face or something, and then you'd be like, who am I? I don't know. It might be your urban myth, but I remember, I mean, this is the kind of thing you could bring up, I guess, it's a nice breaker. But it only works on women.

Well, maybe it works on men. I guess it works on men, too, if you wanted to. It's also such a specific thing to forget, just who you are. Well, I guess, I guess the idea is that it gives you such horrible brain damage. Well, I'm sure, I'm sure if, for instance, you could, like, you knew every president and what order they go in in history. You also forget that, too, perhaps. There is a difference between short-term and long-term memory.

I don't know how it works, but you might lose some trivia also in, like, in this process of them tricking you to being a prostitute or whatever they do. That's the idea that these pimps go around and they blow dust. Oh, they're pimps. I think. I thought that this was like, these were like holy men or something. No, I think it's like a, it's like a sex trafficking thing. I mean, that's the gimmick at least. I don't know.

I don't know if they refer themselves as pimps. I mean, that's a, I don't know if it's a universal descriptor. Are you sure you're not just thinking of rohypnal? No, I think it's different. I think this is, this might not be real, but it's based, it was some thing like, I forget what, what, what's YouTube. That's a cooler way to roofy people, though. I don't think there's any, I won't endorse that.

The cooler, I mean, look, anything you do like this is cooler. Sure. Like, you're like Kaiser Sosa, really, and like that, he's gone. Now you're a prostitute. No, I mean, look, I mean, it's just, I'm, the point is don't do that. I forget how we got on to the- The point is, there's a better way. There's a better way, you just talk to people.

And it's not only for sex purposes, if you want to make friends, you just fucking, You say, hey, I was fired for my job for, for, you know, speaking out against, uh, immigrants or something. You go, really? Like, yeah, I said it shouldn't be immigrants. They fired me. And you go, wow, that's really, and I'm just kidding. You think that turnaround should be that quick? I think, honestly, look, look, I feel like you need an eight-hour turnaround on the lie.

I don't know. I mean, it depends on the lie. I feel like that one, yeah, me probably, okay, you eight-hour turn. You want eight hours to go. So let's say you've seduced this beautiful woman. I didn't, yeah, I wouldn't be clear up. My thing, I didn't say I was kidding. But people just kind of blew up because everyone just kept checking their phones.

But, I mean, that's a verifiable thing. But if you say I was fired for, yeah, I guess you keep that going the longer. So you just become known as a racist guy. And then when people find out you're not, it's not racist per se. You just think there's enough job, you know, we have enough, we need jobs for people here. And you say that. Hey, I'm not racist. you know whatever make your case make your case but then you go no I don't even have a job

later on when you're talking to these people and then like but you know and it relieves attention it makes people like oh all right this guy's this guy's got his humor we don't know where and he'll don't know where you stand politically did you do that to mock people who like are anti-immigration did you do that because you kind of are you want to carry some live that no one knows you're an enigma and that's the most valuable thing you can be right now is an enigma. Everyone just keeps talking, I love freedom. I love, don't buy, people were talking about black rifle. What is black rifle coffee? I saw a controversy where they, they weren't Second Amendment enough. They're veteran coffee. I don't, I'm not trying to

advertise to this company. I'm just saying, and people go, ah, like that. And it just becomes a white noise. Be an enigma. I have to say, though, there were quite a few people. right who uh you know upon hearing that brownie james had killed himself and then rapidly discovering that that was a lie yeah there were quite a few people who basically turned to us and go and went well it's night mean nice meeting you guys immediately left yeah but that's not those aren't quality people those aren't people you want in your life that's true right if you're gonna if you're gonna lose your mind over that yeah i mean everyone lies to you now i'm a guy who's coming out with

you know what you what you want me you want to sell you some fucking you know drink made from palm trees you know over you know you convince you to buy into my multi-level marketing company is that we prefer everyone's trying to get something from you there's no friends anymore anyway uh there's this thing uh i don't know if this is a real thing is this is this a is this a truth or is someone trying to spread a rumor that uh is homeless people don't nearly double in blue states in just two years. A lot of those people are migrants, you know, they're around for sure. Are they migrants with homes?

What? Are they migrants with homes? No. So they're home, they're, they're accurate done. Yeah. Yeah. No, I'm just contextualizing, not denying. No, I agree.

I agree. But it's, it's a, but yeah, I mean, they're, you know, they're definitely around. I don't even need to read this article. There's a lot of, like, you know, a lot of the stuff that was set up during COVID. Right. For, you know, restaurants to see people outside and stuff are now shelters. Wait, those outdoor things in front of restaurants are shelters now? I mean, they were kind of acting at shelter, some of them.

Officially? I mean, no, not officially. Oh, okay. I thought they were, like, clearing people out of like, um, burtos. You're like, all right, make way, make way. like you're like taking a clam like when you have clams starts to strogan on the street

like it's someone's home you pig I love how you have such such a strange and abstract mind um in all cases except for when I say anything

and then you're just a hundred percent literal no it's fair that's a fair assessment but it's but so you're in a bad state I feel

for them they're you know they're not in a good way i'm a very compassionate man and i have a plan for the homeless you do i do i have a plan of i don't i don't know what's going to stop them for being homeless isn't just another one of your pickup games you you have your pickup artist games i'm married you actually care about the homeless and want to solve this problem for them first of all i'm married so i'm not trying to pick up women all right i'm not some playboy uh but yeah if i was single i would definitely use this to get laid uh and it would you know if i think curing homelessness should get should get you a few a few uh sex sessions uh if the world was fair but whatever i don't think it's done to one quarter you know if you were a guy if you were a guy who fixed

homelessness even if just as new york and you couldn't get laid you look around and you go what the what the fuck i cured homelessness no one will fuck me not even the homeless i mean i'm I mean, I mean, solving homelessness is kind of a simple move, you know. I guess, yeah. People don't want you to fix anything. They just want, they want you to break it. Breaking shit is hot. Regardless, I have an idea.

And it's a good idea, and it'll work if we do it. We teach the homeless karate. Okay. Okay. I mean, look, I'm not against teaching the homeless karate. Yeah. But. You can say karate.

But once you say, say it like that it's so fun it is fun um but why oh here oh i'm glad you asked i would see that's seven is this semniotics is that the term for it when people study language and how people talk you say something like the way i just said it and you give them a tease and you make them ask why and now they're engaged now you pull her in and you go because it gives them confidence homeless people notoriously not confident you think that's yeah that's what they're lacking they lie they they they may act very confident you might you like you know weak people think homeless people are confident because they're always yelling at them and setting

them on fire and like and or whatever right but that's not real i mean real confidence you could tell someone's got balanced heart you know their core they're like they're centered and i don't get you know i think homeless people are very kind of jumpy because they're afraid you might hurt them and take their things you think that's why yes i think they have a lot they have these things all they have are these little things they have these you know trash or whatever junk they carry around or cans or you know satchels whatever computers maybe someone have laptops i'm sure there's some homeless people who have laptops and day trade i'm sure it's a thing why wouldn't it be everything else is real right you tell me there's no homeless people who day trade on laptops

we work it's possible so my point is but they're afraid because if you take they're on the edge if you take away anything from them then they just plunge down the rabbit hole of society you got to give them the means

to protect themselves and that's why you teach them cattas and you know different different martial techniques you teach them to do kicks kick wood and half and that makes them

less likely to kick a woman or a man but if they did still decide to kick a woman or man, couldn't they do so with more deadly precision after they've learned your techniques? Look, I mean, if you're, if you look at on the news and you see that, like, Ray Komp has gotten his way and we're teaching the homeless people karate and you don't decide to take karate lessons yourself, you're dumb. You're going to need to learn karate.

If I get my way, we're all going to need to learn karate. I mean, you're going to learn, you're going to walk around knowing less karate than a homeless guy. That's crazy. That's suicide. It's kind of embarrassing. I call that a brownie james that's suicide

but um no look I mean here's the thing it will make them imagine because like you're always seeing home people yell at each other on the streets and like throwing things at each other imagine if they could just kind of like you know they kick it out real quick

you know you see you watch a karate tournament it's very quick it's just like pop pop pop and like and it's over you ask any any martial arts man any martial arts enthusiast speaking of which i'm going to put it out there and i want you all not harass the man but you know go in his comments say right com sent me he's got a plan for the homeless you should have on him and i want jo rogan to co-author this with me because he's a man who knows martial you know karate uh i think he does taekwondo which is basically karate from

korea i mean i'm that's offensive i'm sorry i think it's just korean karate i mean it might be him but okay so you want him involved i would love to have him involved who who could be more of an endorsement in him if i so yeah and he and he would you know what you want personally he's dead shecky chan he does comedies it's not really don't people won't take him seriously no i think rogan's the right one we have him on and then yeah get me on this show and i can give it's rogan if i can do this we don't even need the government is he the one teaching everybody karate No, but that's my point. He hasn't toyed one karate yet.

I don't think he has a dojo. So let's just do it. Let's make a homeless dojo. Yeah. And they can sleep in the dojo sometimes if they're good. If they do the right thing. Look, I'm okay with all of this, but I feel like if you're going to be teaching this to people, you've got to give him a little direction with it.

I mean, you might as well, maybe they can, maybe they can defend. Maybe the homeless can become a defense force of sorts. Look, I mean, you want. Like an even more effective version of the goal. guardian angels because you know I think yeah because honestly it they probably would be more effective if they had less to lose you know and confronting crime I won't even actually confronted a crime I won't even put my put my name on it because it just sounds better if we if we call this whole organization the Joe Rogan karate club and then we give her certificate

I'm going to be part of it I'm going to be like co-owner or whatever but I let him have a name as a gift and it's just you know he's got more gravitas and as part of this whole deal if you complete you know whatever the blue belt I don't know what belts are better the colored belts black belt is the best that's the best I mean I don't know if we're going to expect these people to get black belts a lot of them have like rashes but yeah maybe blue belt there is a blue belt I think I think maybe a green belt you get them up to blue belt you get a blue belt and then we we give you a jogging karate club certificate uh or you know or certification that you can protect the business

Kind of like Kyle Rittenhouse. Like Kyle Rittenhouse, yeah. Right. And like, but this is, but this is. But a Kyle Rittenhouse who's been through a little bit more. Sure. I mean. Before, before that, that, you know, moment comes.

Right. Look, I got nothing to say about Kyle. You know, the right thing. Who? They found a medicine, right? Yeah. So you, I can't be, I can't be held responsible for this. And also, I'm not giving them guns yet.

But like the point is, so if it does go poorly, whatever so they broke someone's arm all right is that making the news oh a homeless guy broke some guy's arm because he thought he was uh trying to steal from the diamond store whatever you know i think i don't i don't think a news editor is going to look at that and go who gives us shit and tors in the garbage no we got if he shot the guy then yeah it's a problem and i'm not anti-gun everyone knows that i'm mr gunhand you know but i'm just saying it makes you can be under the radar if you're just just breaking arms right for good I'm saying if things go wrong things always go wrong

there's always going to be a few wrong things but you if you do it with karate it's less permanent that's all I'm saying and then we get these homeless people off the streets onto the mats and then and then they can protect us and then we can grow to love them and then they'll be like well can we have a house now well no that's then we wouldn't have protection It's a vicious cycle of it all I mean that's a thing You go oh you're bleeding heart I just tricked a bunch of homeless people

To become the cops How am I a bleeding heart liberal You fucking people I'm on another level It's a it's a genius solution in a way Thank you You know I mean turning the homeless From a kind of like a site that makes

That puts people on edge Right That makes people sad To a site that makes people feel safe Yeah I mean look if you If you fucking can't come to me a homeless person, and I haven't eaten in days.

And I'm, I'm mad about it. Please give me money. And usually, a lot of times I'm a little more aggressive than that, but whatever. I'm so hungry. I'm like, all right, maybe I'll get it. But if you do like a roundhouse kick in the air, like a spinning kick, I'm like, damn, dude, that's, that's great. That's just great.

Good for you. And I'll toss some change at you. I know this isn't realistic. Right. But I kind of like the idea of them doing, like, you know, for each business that they're protecting. right right one man to a business yeah i think if you look if you're a black belt blue belts is two the ideal thing is a black belt he can do it on his own i like the idea of them doing kind of like

even when they're not fighting somebody or defending the business they're still kind of like doing karate moves oh yeah like a little dance well because not paying him a salary so they kind of have like still you know work for you know try to get tips yeah in the public but i mean there are tips for like you know athletic ability not just some guy who's like ah yeah i'm hungry well then do a kick do a flip in the air right i mean i just karate do flips i think you do flips in karate right i could have that wrong i'm sorry um if there's no flips and karate egg on my face i guess but i'm assuming these people flip in the air sometimes these are some of the questions that joe rogan can't answer right this is why i need a guy like jo rogan on my side because he you know he brings

credibility he brings a lifetime of knowledge um he has organizational tactics i'm sure he might come in and be like well what you know what about what you know what about swords maybe we involve swords in this i'm like genius but i won't do that i don't i don't have the confidence to do that my own i need a rogan in my corner before i start giving storage of the homeless i mean this is almost like this is this is a utopian vision you got to break a few eggs and if those eggs happen to be you know thieves who are trying to steal from you know a qualified business who you know that's yeah you know eggs are going to get broken one way or the other if you don't do anything then you don't at least we just way we control the eggs you get my point yes yes people will

get hurt i am not denying that this will this if you want to spin it you could spit it in a poor way in a way that makes me look like a like i did a bad thing but that's true of everything now there's no winning unless you take life by the throttle and you and you ride the horse right now there are there is the occasional you know dangerous homeless person it's generally a negative stereotype about homeless people generally homeless people are not going to out to harm anybody but every once in a while you get somebody who's in a schizophrenic episode they hurt somebody accidentally or purposefully um how will they be dealt with and by the sense they will deal with them in the class you got some crazy guy who's talking a lot of shit and all this

is, you know, Jordan Crotty Club class. You don't think the fucking Sensei, whoever it is, whoever it is, me or Joe or whoever we hire. You're not going to be one of the Sensei? I mean, sure. Oh, okay. Yeah. I mean, I'll have to get, you know, some, I'll have to, you know, get my own blue belt or whatever. Right.

I have to say, we usually say one belt ahead of whoever you're training. I think it's the idea. So once I get my brown belt, I can train, or the brown belt high, whatever. The blue belt, I can train no bodies. And up the list we go. But whatever, I'm saying, if you got some guys. who's a problem, then yeah, as a sense that you can do a bunch of karate shit and you humble them. And once you humble a man, you know, like that, they learn to fish.

That's just how it were. I mean, people are just afraid when you're docile and you walk through the streets of New York and you just go, oh, please don't hurt me. That makes them want to hurt you. And that's just homeless you, anyone. Oh, please don't rip me off, you know, in Times Square. Please don't serve me a bad meal at the fucking, at the shitty pizza place. you know or the fucking or the pinit majeer whatever the fuck they have here the fucking sabara bread

pantera bread what is it sabaro the pantera or panera panera bread yeah oh i hope this is good you know hope the lemonade doesn't kill me but if you come in you go and you come in you go you fucking lemonade kills me my fucking friends are going to come here and and destroy this business so fucking you know roll the dice people are going to treat you different not going to try to rip you off just be a fucking person be a fucking confident person who just you know chooses life so those who step out of the line are humbled right but but i mean hasn't the experience of being homeless probably already humbled them significantly no because it's not it's not physical

they need to learn physical confidence right you like people misunderstand what's happening they just think that like everyone out there is just that they're lashing out because they're just like, you know, because they're confident and so and everything's going well, no, because they're, they're, they're insecure about their situation and what they can do with their hands. You know, men, you know, Mr. Miyagi didn't start shit. He finished it. That's a fact. Yeah. You know? Sure. Uh, so good luck to, good luck homelessness. Your days are not over. That's how I would phrase it. Can we get a shirt? that says that, goodbye homelessness?

The Ness will be on the back. But, yeah, whatever. I bet you if we read that article, they wouldn't have any solutions. They're just like, oh, homeless, what will we do? Duh. I told you what to do. That do it.

What else we got going on today? A lot of stuff going on, a lot of ideas circulating. I had another thing. I'm sick of hearing about, look. look, I think what got me thinking about this was the fact that these January 6th guys were all pardoned, which fine, cool, let's roll with it. Everyone should get pardoned. But that's besides my point, just pardon everyone.

Everyone. Yeah, I mean, honestly, I think that a good use of the presidency is like pardoning someone, pardoning as many people as possible. Right. I feel like there should be a, there should be a competition. yeah a healthy competition i think it should be how many people can get pardon i think in order to get a bill passed you should have to like be you you should have to do things a president should have to commit a bunch of crimes in the first term or a son can um like

you know hunter and joe but whatever like you have to do that and hope you can you should not be able to pardon until your second term that's how you fix this and you make it work so you should have to do a bunch of stuff but it's a risk right and then you can if you so if you if you do a good enough job and people like you enough and want this to keep happening

then you know then we'll then then you can do what much as you want right like I mean what what did they end up doing they stole some money from an oil company these Bidens is that the idea the hunter was fucking involved something and like embezzling

oil company money or something and usually come Burisma Well, I mean, the charges, I think, had more to do with the gun and the crack. Well, that's a charge they brought up. I was saying, but the idea that, like, that they were, what was all that shit? What was he doing working over there in Ukraine anyway? It's kind of weird to the war.

And now, I don't know, it just seems very shady. Right. My point is, look, maybe it didn't happen. I don't know. I'm just saying that's the idea, right? Mm-hmm. I mean, if that's true, I mean, it's not correct. Like, would it matter?

to you? No, it's a fucking energy company. Who gives a shit? My point is, like, of course we fucking arrest these people, unless they fix health care. Unless you fix the prison system, right? Unless you fix homelessness. Hey, this guy, like, stole a bunch. This guy fixed homelessness in New York City.

Right, but he, like, stole a bunch of money from an energy company. Who gives her shit? It's a fucking energy company, right? Yeah. You see that on point? Right. So your crimes that enrich you have to be less than the things you do that are positive. And this is not even my idea.

My idea is to give, is to put cats in prison. What? Well, not, not like, not, not as a penal thing. Not for the cats. But yeah, I, look, because I got thinking about these people in prison and Trump was saying, I think

Trump said, like, oh, it's terrible, the prisons. He said something like, oh, it's torturous. These prisons are awful. And prisons are generally not good. They're generally pretty bad places. Oh, yeah. I mean, you know, some of the people who were arrested for their part in January 6th, regardless of whether you think how bad

you know, you think they behaved. Sure. Like, you know, some of them have been put in solitary confinement for like crazy amounts of time, you know. Just based on what they did? Wait, is that based on what they did in prison or just because of what they were charged with? I think maybe for one guy, it was, I mean,

sometimes it's because of like your behavior inside or whatever. Right, you go to jail for like, you know, uh, stealing, you know, some bread to feed your kid. And, like, you know, but then if you go in there and you start fucking, like, you know, kneecapping people and fucking, you know, stealing their dessert, they're going to put you in the hole, you know? That's just, what's just going to happen.

Yeah, I don't, I don't think they necessarily did anything like that. But also it's like, look, prisons are super corrupt. They're corrupt. They would do that to you for no reason. Sure. We go, oh, you want those, you want those J6 boys? And they put you in a fucking rat hole. Here's how you make everything better.

You put the cats in prison. because there's nothing better than a cat Yeah And people But you have to work it Right Nothing teaches you empathy Like having a cat

Because cats are very skittish And already get a cat to love you You have to be very gentle and very patient And learn to touch its belly It was just nice warm stuff That will make prisoners Who tend to be Look I mean

Whether it's because you don't have money or because you're inherently violent sociopath or because, you know, you just bet socially awkward. You didn't play the game right or you hurt someone real bad. You're in prison. You have some things to work on. Even if it's just not, you know, well, I get cold because you're unlikable, I guess, or you don't have money. No one's in prison because they're the best thing. You know, everyone who's in prison has something to work on.

Even if you're a whistleblower, well, maybe you should have, you know, been more careful and strategic. and then went to France first or something. You know, learn how to be sneakier. Learn to be sneakier. The point is cats can teach you all this. And it can make you calmer and nicer. And they teach you how to love. And every prisoner will have a cat.

And it'll be cats in the mess hall and in the showers. So if you start, you know, if someone, you know, everyone's, oh, I don't want to go in the show. Don't drop the soap. Well, the cats there. It's not making noise. And a lot of, and honestly, like, maybe punishments should be doled out based on how the cat's doing.

Right. Well, no, 100%. Well, here's the thing. If you let the, if you get, if you, obviously, if you allow the cat to die. No, yeah. You know, you, I'm way ahead of you on this. You get rat holed, but like, I'm way ahead. But if you even let your cat get fat, you know, you're, you're probably, no, it's a problem. No, it's a problem. No, if you abuse your cat, and I'm a way ahead of you on this. If you, because it's a carrot and stick, right?

It's like Winston, this is, this is a classic leadership. Carrots and sticks. If you treat the cat well, you become a better person. And, yeah. we give you more responsibility maybe and whatever, you know, nicer food. I don't know. Maybe cat boys get nicer food.

I don't know. If you treat your cat poorly, if you abuse your cat, first offense, we cut open your arm and we shove marbles in there. And I don't even know what it is. Like when you open up someone's arm, there's veins,

there's arteries, there's bone muscle, right? All those sorts of things. And like, you know, when you shoot, when you inject, you know, when you, as a child, you look, oh, I'm getting an injection. You don't think of like, well, is that going into the muscles?

Is that going into just the blood? Is that going into like the area outside the blood? Mm-hmm. Is there an area? There is an area outside the blood, right? Because it's vessels and his arteries, right? Yeah. My point is, I don't know.

And I'm not going to be discriminating. So I'm just going to cut into the arm and shrub marbles wherever the cut is. So is that going to, I mean, it's going to be a deep cut. Yeah. I'll sew up. I mean, like, I mean, at best, at best what that leads to is, you know, a few marbles, like, jangling around like around your epidermis.

So annoying. So annoying. Right. Probably you hear it. Yeah. I don't think it'll get infections because, you know, we'll make sure you don't get infections. That feels like that's bad. You shouldn't infect people.

But you can put marbles inside them. But it's also if you abuse the cat, right? I mean, if you forget to feed it one time, no, we don't shove marbles inside you at that point. But, you know, if you're, but we know, it's like Oliver Wendell Holmes. We know when we see it, right? I know cat abuse when I see it And you're getting fucking marbles in your own bitch That's just that's

You know Yeah That's the plan Is it the best plan It's the plan we got What if okay Variation on this Right

Because you got to be able to see all the angles Right Before you do that Like what is What's the punishment For a prisoner Killing another prisoner's cat Oh yeah

You get an arm cut off we can't make it like an eye for an eye with cat the human well I think we can like agree you like yeah you lose an arm if you do it on purpose yeah yeah no maybe maybe a hand

I know I'm going to be a lot of people the ACLU and we'll work this out with Congress I'm not like I'm not getting a posse of prison guards to do this this is all going to be above board it's going to be a we're a democratic society and we're all going to decide together

how many limbs we cut off when kill your, you know, another inmate's cat. It's not going to be on me. I'm not going to go to jail for this. I refuse. I also, okay, another thing that I'm just a problem, potential, I'm for seeing. Because if we keep putting marbles in people's arms. Right.

You know, assuming they're at all visible. Like, I feel like there's going to become a culture of seeing how many marbles you can get. Right. You know, the more marbles. the harder you are. Well, that's what, that's when I, I, I do, I do corporate synergy. And I get my, and I get some of my friends, you know, that I helped out through the Joe Rogan Karate Club, you know,

and I get them to, you know, we put them in the prison as undercover, you know, inmates. And, you know, they might have been in jail before, so they can probably blend in. I'm not trying to, you know, but smirch. I mean, look, I'm sure there's plenty of homeless people who have never been to jail in any capacity. You won't be probably picked for this assignment. There you go.

uh but like i'll get these boys and i'll fucking and you know they'll they'll use some of those other skills if you try if you're trying to game the system if you're trying to make a society of marble like we're like oh hey in order to get into our prison gang you got to get more marbles in your arm so it proves that you hate cats you hurt cats yeah we ain't got to let that happen we're not letting that happen you can get karate in the face and there'll be nothing to trace me back to it you know you need checks and balances and that's what this is so I mean you know it's like you know how you ever going to prove some homeless guy you know what you think we keep records of the Jordan karate club I mean he might want to

I mean he's got a lot of money and businesses he might you know that might be where we part ways and I just stop using his name because I refuse to keep records you'll never know who my move of people I helped are that way didn't come and help me like you're on like let me's a rob right wasn't that the thing I mean is a rob I didn't really see it but the priest helps John Valjean or something Yeah take these silver

Take this shit Handel holders take it and now you're the king right You're the mayor of the town Oh yeah then he becomes the mayor of the town There'll be some fucking mayor one day Honestly there's a lot of loose ends Sure In the musical at least

Honestly I read the book I didn't read the whole book I got the audio book for that for some reason Someone told me to read it And, like, it was like 20, it felt like it was like 15 hours and they still hadn't gotten past the priest. I never met John Valjean. Whatever. Point is, it was good, it was good, though.

It was an interesting book. There one day will be a city, a mayor of New York, a president of the United States, who might have been one of the homeless that I helped, who became powerful. And again, I forgot, I didn't think of this before, but there'll be no records. So people will be able to help me. I'll be able to call on people. and you'll never it'll be like one of those those blue blood networks like skell and bones or whatever you know all these fucking people who run in the world they won't want the college together these fucking frats right yeah and Harvard and oh it's skull and bones oh so that you know

there's no rack you just know like hey business meeting you fucking you know you have a lunch with your friend and you decide to like you know destroy the federal reserve system or something you know it's all done that way hey let's let's invade Tokyo I don't know over over crabs oysters. I don't know crabs oysters. I'm thinking of Clamps Casino. Whatever. You know, you call,

you give him a friend a call. Casual lunch. Yeah, that's true. I mean, imagine deciding to invade a country over a casual lunch. I don't mean, I don't mean fast casual.

I'm not talking about, you know, a Chibolai. I mean, like, you've got like a cat, like a nice place. Right. You got, like, you know, maybe get some beef tidbits,

right, or you're sake tidbits. Or you get a nice, Caesar salad and a club sandwich and you decide like you know who who who's got lithium we need it let's go fucking I'll get my friends at the Pentagon you get your friends at the fucking at the fucking where you work again CIA it's great so it's all coming together synergy sending sending thousands of children to the mine yeah while you still have a little bit of mayonnaise on the you're not gonna stop people who do that by not having your own networks of people

And that's why you help the homeless. And like, and again, oh, you want to turn to homeless into your shadow warming. No, no, no, no, I help them. If they want to return the favor, I mean, I'm not going to, there's no one, I'm not putting a chip inside them. It's not an escape from New York. You know, the head's not going to blow up if they don't help me. But realistically, there are going to be many people who feel they owe you. They are going to owe me.

And like, look, the thing about owing is like civil court. You can't get blood from a stone. It's the whole thing of civil women people sue each other. You can sue me if you want, but I got no money. There's nothing they can do about that. a blood from a stone, right? So they will owe me these homeless people because I did help them.

But, you know, they might not help me. They might be bad people at the end of the day. Right. You can't fix bad. Well, the cat might help. There are, I mean, the cats can help. You do, you know, going around the city and stuff, you do see a fair number of disabled homeless, you know,

people in wheelchairs, right. People with no arms, people with no legs. They, yeah, I think they, they, they, They got their own gimmick going. I don't think we need to, I don't think we need to, like, you know, money the waters here, you know. Once the able-bodied homeless are gone. I'm not going to do disabled karate. They'll need more money.

I know what you want from me. You want me to do disabled karate? I'm getting that lawsuit nightmare. A bunch of fucking people in wheelchairs attacking each other. This just sounds like a problem. This is why big government can't fix things. It's all got to be every crippled person has got to be part of it. No, I'm sorry.

This is a lottery, and you didn't win. people who were disabled. I'm sorry. But in a way they do win too because there's less competition. Sure. You know, when they're out with their cups, there isn't some, you know, like able-bodied homeless guy. I prefer they weren't helped by it just so they can't.

I feel like disabled people can be very litigious. And so I want to make sure, you know, as soon you get ramps put in and places and stuff. So I want to make sure, I'd prefer that anything I do doesn't help them at all just so they can't, like, turn that against me because when you when you help someone they can always be like well that

help hurt me actually you know oh you gave me money and I use that money in a fucking you know by a gun to shoot my son you know I mean I was just trying to help you yeah well if you didn't give me that that money for the sandwich I wouldn't have the gun the gun money it's like well real cash 22 or an army it's a real Murphy's law situation so I don't know you know um whatever But if they get helped, I guess that's fine. I mean, I don't love it. I mean, look on my shoulder all the time. Who else?

Who else? How do you start getting the word out about this? But which one? The cats are the karate? Which comes first? They both kind of flow into each other, don't they? Yeah, I mean. The karate guys in the pretty.

We'll need to do the karate guys first, just because we'll need them to, like, keep a tamp, we'll tamp down, like, the, what you mentioned, the guys who want to hurt cats. Right. I'll need to enforce that with my underground karate network. But this is, like, this is how you win, and this is how you create a new society. You don't whine about politics. Politics is nothing anymore. There's nothing you could do. Oh, they're going to deport me.

I don't, I can't do anything about it, which I, you know, it's over. Oh, are you going to do that? I can't do anything about this. I can train the homeless in karate though, right? I can clean up my, you know, my, my streets. Um, you know, you can clean these streets. You know, I can make the streets cleaner.

Yeah. Violence. But not my, you know, proxy violins. What do you want for me? I feel like I'm giving up all these answers and all I'm being scrutinized. I just gave the world like three good ideas

and I'm not going to do shit with it. The first one was a good, you know, nice breaker at parties and then two things about, you know, homeless people and criminals. And no one's going to take, you know, I feel like it's going to fall on deaf ears. Well, you know, sometimes, first they first they ignore you.

Right. then they laugh at you and then they fight you yeah and that's when you win with your homeless karate army i'd love to i mean when the guns come into this i'm very pro second amendment i want to make that clear because a lot of people are talking shit like right comp is not pro second amendment i'm a fucking gun hand enthusiast i love guns yeah um so i don't want people getting the idea that he's some kind of pussy who's all he just cares about karate it's not true we love to teach them to hunt what if we teach

what do we get homeless people hunt a deer aren't these hunters are always going there's so many deer and pigs and it's overrun in the country

just get the homeless people to shoot them there's an army of people here yeah I mean honestly giving them of like a kind of

complete set of skills for wilderness living and survival right combined with getting them to hunt deer for us I mean

that's how you make a free society that's a they're like the they're like the the the citizen militia of the of the of the 1700s right these are the minute men homeless people are the new minute men we can be like oh i'm gonna get some guy who works a fucking you know investment bank oh i got to go home i got to drive half hour at home and get my fucking guns and then come back to the city because shit's popping off you want people who like aren't busy during the day who have all their shit on hand right yeah that's who you want as that because minute men that was what they call like the militia right who are ready to go on a minute's notice and we're

going to fight the British now I mean that that literally would be the homeless yeah I mean I you know the second amendment you know says something about a well-organized militia right it's right it's right there in front of us we can organize it with an app right now we have apps right you put you put a fucking chip in the guns so that we know where the guns are so if you lose if someone loses their gun we can track it with the chip with the that is great yeah I mean yeah that's like the militia of the golden age the only reason we haven't done it is corporate greed that's the only reason yeah yeah is because people want you know because Raytheon wants to you know they want they want they want to use the homeless for you know their purposes they want to keep them busy you know they probably I don't know I'm not I don't use Raytheon wants to you know they want to use I'm sure there's some of some people out there who are injecting homeless people with stuff just to see what happens like guinea pigs sure i think it's terrible that won't name companies because i'll be sued for gross slander um i don't know i just i just want people to have confidence again i want people to feel good about america

no what side of the aisle you happen to be on left or right or up down outside inside that's beautiful i'd love to i don't know make a drink out of like piss separately like we i mean we just like we just piss into we pissing into the toilets all day right that's true most of us pissing the toilets all day i feel like it's a waste why can we take that and like turn it into like why can't we use that to fight fires why didn't it just run piss to the fucking you tell me if you put piss in the fire hose it won't put a fire out look can you look at that for me why didn't it just have have all the toilets in LA run into the reservoir for the for the fire pumps oh urinating on a fire will not be

enough to put it out but they're assuming you're the piss you have in your dick or your Pussy. Right. Yeah, they think we're just talking about drips and drabs. I'm talking about a swimming pool full of piss. A centralized supply. You're telling me, you're telling me the whole idea of fighting fire, I think, is, I mean, a big part of it is using the water doesn't like, it's not like fire is allergic to water. It suffocates it, right?

It robs it of oxygen, the fire. You tell me if you shove a bunch of shit onto a fire, it's not going to stop the oxygen. You tell me, oxygen just penetrates shit that easily. A bunch of nasty shit and piss. Just fucking dumb a chemical toilet on to a fire. It's not going to stop it. I got to imagine it's doing something. I could have saved that way.

This page says it's fun and safe to pee on campfires. So it's not like it's not like it's not like piss would inflame the fire. Well, sure. Like it's, but it maybe would be slightly less effective than water, but not a giant. Right, but you know, it's not less effective than an empty tank of water. Because God knows why. Why is that tank empty? That giant reservoir.

I don't know because no one was putting piss in it. These are ideas I have. And maybe we could also make a drink out of it. You filter it. You know, and people go, well, you know, hey, you want to save the earth, drink piss water. There's actually no, there's no piss inside. But we filtered it from piss. I thought you wanted to save the earth.

I thought you cared you don't care okay you don't want to drink there's no piss we got it from piss it's not like you know when you drink orange juice it's not it's not an orange

inside it's the juice from the orange this is the juice from the piss I'm just saying I don't know why this isn't seem controversial to me piss is the fruit of which this product is made yes

I mean, I've always wondered why piss isn't used for more things. It isn't filtered and used for more things. I think it has something to do with like maybe desalinating it or something. Yeah, you have to take a salt out of it. Once you take the salt out of piss, it's just water. Right. Yeah. Water is just salty.

It's just salty of water. So, I mean, I don't know what people are even freaking out about. You eat salt. You eat water. It's the difference. Oh, piss. Waste. It's a word you use.

Waste. It's a fucking made-up word. I want people to remember that I tried to help them. As this, honestly, it doesn't feel like society is going great. People are just very mad at each other. And, like, yeah, they're just very on edge. And I'm giving them all these answers.

Well, many are capitalizing on these divisions. You're trying to heal. them try to heal wounds and uh you ungrateful fucking people it's unbelievable unbelievable will i go through on daily basis uh thanks so much for tuning in we appreciate uh the people who do care who listen and love and uh make sure you like and subscribe so we can keep we can get this piss water uh machine um built also page HR.com slash rate comp extra episode every week is that so either way we'll see you next week have a great week