Kump - Ep. 200 Worst Super Bowl Party

Episode Date: February 7, 2025

Ray and Lucie discuss Ray’s ideas for prisons, picking up chicks, solving the homelessness crisis, and much more. Sign up at https://www.patreon.com/RayKump for an extra episode every week! Follow Kump on Twitch https://www.twitch.tv/raykump Kump Hand Merch https://bonfire.com/store/kump/ Follow Ray on Sound Cloud https://on.soundcloud.com/QbP8

Hello and welcome to Kamp. Hello. Hello, Lucy. Hi. How are you? Good. I like your sweatshirt today. Thank you. It's a it's a revenant from Doom.

um which they're like demon souls that were forced into corporate warfare like that corporate war war you know war war by a corporation in hell um yeah they can mine they can mine hell and i think he's in i think he's in love with shot it's not a valentine's day shirt i was wondering where the heart why the hearts were there because he had a shotgun in his hand he's in love with the shotgun and the shotgun's got some kind of claw thing it's It's nice. You once let me play your Doom game for a few seconds. Very scary.

Not to me because I'm an adult man. Yeah, sure. I mean, did you think it was real for a second? I don't know if you remember, but like the entire, I was playing for like 30 seconds. Oh, you wanted to play. But it was like at the end of the game when things get real hairy. Real hell. It's a real hell scape.

And just demons and his ghouls and his goblins and his goblins. and big men pig men I think if I remember correct it's been a while I think it was like a man with a pig face but he was giant

hate it love it all that give me all that goop that's what hell's gonna be hell's gonna be a big

a big pile of goop so welcome to the show um Valentine's Day is coming up and that's exciting for everyone everyone's very umped up because it's an important holiday that means a lot and if you don't spend money on your on your hose and women then you ain't not you ain't you ain't you ain't nothing i want people to remember that we're not we're not living in the age of uh you know

la di da anymore all right we got we got we have government efficiency on the mind and that's trickling down. And so I, you know, you better be getting money from your man and you better be getting sex from your woman. And that's the natural balance. You know, that's the, the natural state. It's true. What about for the single people out there? You better get your game up, you know, start, start, get your drip up, get your frigging money up, get your pockets loose, loosey-goose. A lot of men have issues approaching women. What do you think is a good opening sentence? Yo, I'm looking to smash.

What's your name, baby? Or just be like, you know, hey, you know what the price of Bitcoin is right now? Or pretend you were a woman being courted. Excuse me, miss. Do you know what the price, what they call that, the spot price of Bitcoin is right now? Well, I heard it. It actually crashed recently. Isn't it below 100 now?

Price of that ass. Price of that ass right there. Tell you that much. Primo. Even if it's not Primo, you still say it. Your ass is Primo. And I got to get in it. Yeah, even if it's a little chunky.

Well, whatever. I mean, a lot of guys like... Or not chunky enough. A lot of guys like big chunky asses with loose skin and drips all over it, just goos and dips. You know, thinking of chicken, you know, women who just dip their chicken fingers into the goo and then, and sauces, and then dip their ass. It just gets on their ass, you know. They're messy eaters. And that's how you get an ass like that.

And that's why men like that kind of thing. Because it's just all over. It's just like, ah, all right? This is not, this is not the age of Gwenna Paltrow anymore and their goop. It's the age of, I don't know, Fergie. Is that her copical reference? I know new people, but I don't know who has a big ass or not

because I'm not sure what error we're in. Fergie is really peaking right now. I mean, does Chapo-Rowin have a big booty? I don't know. Is that the flavor of the day? Chapar-Rowen? What about that girl? What about the woman, the Kanye's, what was it?

Oh, Bianca. Bianca. Sweet Bianca. The Grammys was past Sunday, I guess. And Kanye never fails to disappoint. That man, though, was how to get Prima women, all right? And they just do whatever he said,

unless, you know, unless they're already rich. And he realized with a Kardashian, she wouldn't do, you know, she already had money from her talk show, whatever it is, her reality game show. You know, marry a Kardashian, the game show, whatever it's called. What season is that in?

She married Chris Humphreys and then who else? Kanye, what's this someone in between? I don't know. Did she marry a sheke? some kind of some kind of mullah whatever he learned the hard way

you got to get a woman who you know maybe she did she have any money before she met him I don't know I mean we everyone's seen the picture you want me to show it to you what am I porn hub

I'm not porn hub go find it yourself I'm not here to get spammed with all sorts of freaking YouTube harassment because I'm showing everyone uh what's her name citrone bianca bianca sincori but she had a big very hot name yeah no she's i guess italian and she is so naked under a mesh suit that's how you do it boys valentine's day

welcome to the party get it in if she wants it don't you know don't force it into anyone that's my that's my guarantee um but yeah it's an exciting time you know we're I'm enjoying all the news lately, all the exciting news, very efficient. We got efficiency. You know, who's this guy Musk, who I've never liked very much? But he's just, he's doing a lot of crazy, efficient things. He's getting in, he's shaking things up. This guy's not elected and he's looking at social security numbers.

Who is elected? How many guys want to elect? Yeah, this argument, people make about a lot of money. who's the head now of the Doge, the Dojo, the Doge Dojo, the Department of Government Efficiency, right? And then people get mad, well, he's looking at Social Security numbers. Why don't look at Social Security numbers? I didn't. Do you really want to vote for a man to look at your Social Security number?

Wait, wait, wait, no, tell me, why is you looking at the Social Security number? I'm not sure if he, look, to be fair, and I've never liked the man. But to be fair, he might argue that I'm not just sitting around looking at it. Social Security number. He has access to it as part of this thing because they're auditing transactions. You know, the Treasury does trillions of dollars of transactions.

A lot of it having to do with Social Security, which is like, I always thought it was kind of an entitlement. But not like, people didn't say entitlement, but it's because, like, you pay into it. Yeah. So I don't know how it works. But the point is people who are worried

he's going to turn it off the social security. He's just going to... I didn't think you could. He's just going to cancel it for everybody? I mean, look, the Republicans in general wanted to. I don't know what their plans were. I'm not saying they would just shut it off one day.

But I think they've talked about privatizing it in the past, right? And so I guess that's what's happening. Or they're just going to turn it off or whatever. My point is this. I don't care anymore. I'm not involved unless they hire me. and I'll do the work. Give me a bunch of money so you get some,

you give me to my women, which is you. So you should want that. You should want me involved. I'll get my dirty mitts involved. Don't get me wrong. But do you really want to be voting for more people? I can't even keep track of who's on the ballot now.

I got like assemblymen and I got frigging like, you know, kernels and like some guys judges. I got like, they give me people of judges to vote for, but they're all the same guy, but I choose the party. You don't talking about you get a ballot. I don't know what you may not be.

In New York City, this is how it goes. I mean, tell me if I'm wrong. You vote. You get a bunch of, you, they vote to these judges, pick four. And each line is like one name across the whole thing and just different parties. Oh, yeah. Like one person will be multiple. So there's no option.

There's no option anyway. Stop giving me more. I'm going to vote for the guy. Oh, who wasn't elected. I got to vote for a guy to look at social security numbers at the Treasury Department. you crazy we can't even get people to know who candidates are most of this time besides you know the president who knows their congressmen i mean privatizing like 10 people in the country know who their congressmen are but i'm going to vote for the for the duke of of treasury audits this is not going to happen

this is not a good i'm not saying he's doing anything good i don't know what he's doing down there in the treasury looking at people's you know instagram picks i don't know but i'm not voting for Anyone else refuse. Elderly people obviously need some kind of support as they age. Maybe. As their bodies deteriorate. If they're going to stick around. Become more demanding than they should be.

And, yeah, but they are annoying. Maybe, I mean, could we maybe get elderly people sponsors? Like, you know, people loved Betty White. People loved just watching old people. be out of pocket right and that's the problem most most old people just fart and piss and shit all day and just whine and like I'm being abused I have bed sores no one talks to me the nurses don't turn me enough right why don't you why don't you one why didn't you spend your middle age time the time between what is that like 30 40 40 and 65 I you should be spending

Anyone out there, 40 to 65, you should be spending some of your spare time building some kind of contraption, like a bingo thing. Like the thing you roll bingo balls in for your body so that you can roll yourself or perhaps if you have money, hook it up to a car battery that rolls it for you. And that way you won't get bedstores. Personal responsibility should be a priority now. We're not living in the age of cradles of the grave, you know, suck my thumb communism. you know, suck, suck, suck, yum, yum, yum, you know, all I need is the state. Sorry, Lennon, we're in a new day. And this day, you have to roll yourself.

Maybe you can roll your grandma, but your grandmas can be heavy. Now, I can, I can, my grandma's dead, but I could have rolled her just fine. I got picked her up, flipped her, but I know how to do that kind of thing, right? I used to do that for a living a little bit. It wasn't my main job, but it was part of it. We all know that. Don't get it twisted. Yeah, I mean, she's not a dead body.

You can't, I mean, you might not want to just go like, bah! Well, look, no, I learned the gentle technique where you, yeah, at first you kind of flip and I'm like, oh, then I learned them, I learned, and that's also a strong, I learned to keep him, you got to have a hand down there. Now, you don't want to grab your grandma by the tip. Where? Grab my stomach. And you grab by the stomach.

And you grab my stomach right now, right? Don't get, don't get afraid. And you grab the other arm and you just kind of flip. Yeah. It's just turn. Make sure you hold. all right don't and don't put it inside her by mistake she shouldn't be naked for this she should not be naked i never had that problem and they were naked i never never had that

problem the ones i dealt with it could be a problem i could see how it could be a problem well not if you keep keep your grandma's clothes on that's what i'm telling you all right i don't know what you people are into because you kind of have to hook them to do that you got you kind of have to do a hook a hook shape with your hand just hold just keep your hand flat yeah and then hold their wrist and just kind of like it's one motion it's one motion i'm sure you're right but the way you're describing this push and pull push and pull i don't know you're describing this i feel like every bone in her body would be broken in one motion it's look maybe we got to practice with dummies or something or mannequins manichens you know as a french would call them but you but it's all very

gentle but forceful, you know? That's what life should be, gentle but forceful. And I'm not talking about, you know, rape. Don't do that at all. That should go without saying. I shouldn't have to say it all the time. Don't do that. Because it ruins all the arguments.

Oh, but what about, well, don't, that's just a different thing. But most things, gentle and forceful, like pushing, pool ball with a cue. I believe they call that shooting pool. You know, I remember us talking about this neuralink technology. Were we? That where it helped, it helps some,

a paraplegic guy, like play chess or something. If I can do that, it seems like it should easily, you should easily be able to put a little machine in an old person's brain. Right. It goes, time to eat. Time to talk to your son.

Wait, wait, wait, wait. I think you misunderstand. the problem here. Because that's the problem with Alzheimer's, right? Is you forget to feed yourself? You forget how to chew. Is that the problem? Okay. Is it? I think so. I don't know. I just thought people didn't like their mom didn't know who they were. But I guess that's an issue. That's just selfish. Yeah. I'm about you to let your mom forget you.

Oh, we got cured this disease. Do we? Do we have to cure it? Or do you have to just, you know, learn improv? Were you just a forgettable? Yes, and your Alzheimer's grandma. Or you're just a forgettable kid. Yeah, yeah. Honestly, I've never seen someone famous and sensational. Complain about that. Complain about Alzheimer's. You know, tell me if I'm wrong here.

But I've never seen, like, you know, Freddie Mercury or who is that little Nodge X with the blood shoes? You might not like his music, but he's sensational. You know, he does a lot of crazy stuff. It hasn't been around them much lately. I don't see them talk about Alzheimer's. oh, I'm a grandmother, who I am. She knows who the fuck that guy is. You best bet she knows.

What are we doing here? Be unforgettable. That's my advice to the kids. Be unforgivable. And again, don't do, don't do, don't do shooting in school. Don't that's be unforgetable. To be honest, that is forgetable nowadays. No one remembers the last 10.

They don't. Yeah. So, you know, I, I don't even have to. They've, you might as well be, uh, the guy who frigging did a protest at your school. Oh, we protested the Iraq war, my middle school. Did you? Cool. But you're right.

Like people, I, uh, there's nothing more annoying than watching a person. And I'm a expert on how you're supposed to deal with these diseases of the mind. Right. But like there's, there's something off putting about watching a person. and where the grandmother is going, like, oh, you're my, that she thinks that she's talking to her sister or something, but it's really your daughter. Right.

And the daughter's going, no, mom, no, I'm your daughter. Yeah, who is that helping? Just play a lot. Yeah. Pretend you have Alzheimer's. Oh, who are you? Are you my... I'm your accountant.

Cousin? I'm your accountant. I mean, I'm handling your tax return. Oh, thank you. No problem. So just give me your account number here, and I'll handle it all, all. Thank you so much. You're welcome.

I love you. I'm the world's most loving accountant. And then I got her money. And now I'm not going to not feed her, but what is she doing with money anyway? I mean, women of Alzheimer's have money? That shouldn't be. They'll spend it on anything.

How can you have Alzheimer's to understand, like, you know, budgeting? I don't, and eggs are so expensive now. You know? You got price couched. she just bought eggs we're reading an article about how eggs are like ten bucks in a carton which doesn't seem right no it doesn't seem ideal yeah my advice is eat less eggs eggs are great but you don't have to eat them eat some toast and some fit and some margarine we'll get by sometimes what are you going to do if a war happens complain about the rations for

the eggs eat powdered eggs this is it within a rough time it's inflated what do you want the government to do about it make the eggs last expensive well maybe we need these young people have sex of each other and I mean like adult age young people they keep talking about how the world's gonna depopulate and we're worried about eggs

they're all celibate right is there the whole thing they're all like these celibate they're just doing hand stuff and mouth not even mouth stuff I think maybe mouth stuff I mean most people should probably be fine with mount stuff I don't think we should force these kids into, you know, but I mean, why can't they do that with babies? I don't know if they're even doing mouth stuff.

I'm saying. They're just, they're jerking it to each other's picks. Right. We have to get rid of it, TikTok, Instagram, any kind of porn, and just go back to like, you know, people really needing it. And like, because he has a weird thing. And not to bring this up, you know, twice in five minutes, but has like the sex has gone down? Has the rape gone down? That's the weird thing, right?

Isn't that a weird thing? I mean, maybe. Less kids are having. sex with the same amount of raping? That can't be right. That can't be correct. I don't know why. Why is only consensual sex affected by this apathy?

But anyway, it's a risky. Look, people just need to meet each other in person more and, you know, on a breadline, you can do that. Yes. Meet someone on your ration, you know, in your ration handout line, in your bread line. in your goop line where you get goo, not goop, goo, right? The goo is what we want. The chicken, the chicken finger goo.

We got to make a, why get sued for starting goo? Because goo is, like, goop is just what? I don't know what goop, I know what goo is. Goos a lot of things. Goo is stuff that comes out of you. Goo is stuff you put into you. Goo is the stuff that oozes if you do the things correctly. If you know what that mean, ladies.

I'm the goo doctor. Go, go, go, goo. But I don't know what goop is. But who goop is sue me if I start goo? Maybe not. I'm not afraid to have goo. Well, see, Gwen Patro should have done goo in the first place, but she was afraid of being too overtly sexual.

Of being too, like, oh, tantalizing. You're right, kind of goop. Putting the pee at the end of it does kind of de-sex it a little bit. Yeah, it just sounds like a bunch of garbage. It sounds like the byproduct of sex. not the outcome it sounds like you know it's like it's like it's sex with a machine it's like it's the marmite that comes out of the of the brewing process because marmite's a yeast extract not enough people eat marmite marmite is delicious marmite is an acquired taste you have to force

yourself to like it but once you do you can't get over it you add like kind of a little bit at a time yeah you increase your tolerance you put butter on the toes and then you put marmite Can we get a picture of Marmite? Maybe we'll show it. I don't worry about it. I don't want to waste time with this. This is Marmite. It's like it's a brown syrupy.

It's a brown. It looks like, it looks like, it looks like, it looks like, it looks like Nutella, but it tastes like metal. But it's great. It's like, basically, if you brew a tank of beer or whatever they are, right? A big industrial tank of beer, it's supposed to sludge on the bottom. They're goo. So like, oh, my kids can't eat eggs. Did you try giving them marmite?

Did you try feeding them jellies? Why is everything got to be eggs? Oh, it's not enough protein. What, you're trying to get yokes? No pun intended. Is that why they call it yolk? Because you got to eat a bunch of eggs. How about you just friggin eat some chicken breast?

Chicken breast is cheap as hell. I've been cooking chicken breast lately. Cheap as hell. I mean, seriously, I've been sous eating that shit. Delicious. Comes out of juicy and moist. What Moise and juicy

Juice and moisty I would love to see you doing a commercial for any kind of food It's juice Look at our juice and moisty chicken Get that goo Goo chicken We left out the D

Because you already Wait Because the good The D ain't good I'm probably the Dean good and the dick the same people are always going on and on about how like the greatest generation in this country yeah went through all this shit dog shit generation in my opinion the war the the depression yeah everybody wants to be them but like nobody wants to nobody wants to nobody wants to do it I don't want to I hate them I think they suck I mean which first of all what I mean you'd be um we clarify Americans Americans

Or we're just handling Nazis with the greatest generation. It must be clear. Globally, both. The grand generation. The German ones. I mean, the Japanese, the Italians.

Half the world was trying to, like, exterminated everyone. Yeah, I don't know. I feel like I'm entering a new age. And, like, you know, Musk is here, right? And, you know, in the past, I've called him the scum

because of the whole, you know, a submarine. incident years ago but I've come around to this idea that you could just do whatever you want and there's no rules and it's fine like we're not going to be nothing it's going to be like the world's not going to get good again it's going to be fine you can get rich do a scam make a sandwich that people like and maybe we get money off that although food food sales are very hard it's very hard to start a restaurant but maybe if you put some like weird goo one of the sandwich a chicken finger sandwich with uh black honey what is black honey it's honey

that we mix with dirt and no one dirt's natural like you could eat what happens if i put soil on a hamburger just a layer of soil on top of a hamburger is i mean it may not be like the most delicious thing but i mean it's not going to kill you right i'm not talking about like pesticide soil will grow our own soil. Yeah. Where's soil come from? Like good soil. It's from like dog shit, right?

Why can't humans just live off of photosynthesis? Why can we train ourselves to do that? Why can't Musk do that? You can make me a Starlink, but you can't teach my body to eat sun? What is this? What are we fucking around with here? And what was my plan?

I didn't have a thing? what is the spine-zapping tech and a related thing this article about the spine-zapping implant helped three people with a muscle-wasting disease walk better

to people who have a muscle-wasting disease where their body literally eats their muscle away as if they were laying there like a couch potato with atrophy right some fat slob doing nothing all day and they're just fixing their bodies

with this new tech this is the wrong direction people all right we're in a crisis here the world's not good so how about we stop trying to fix these duds and we give this technology to primo people to people the athletes and singers people we like people who do stuff that we like influencers gymness beefcakes yeah beefcake give it the beef cakes imagine a beefcake we're a spinal implant oh my god why are we trying to like i'm not saying we put these people down but you're trying to vote like entire like you know schools of technology into like fixing people whose like bodies want to kill them what are you a doctor what why how about we how about medicine focuses on making everyone

the best people better anyone ever think of that wait i think someone did anyway If steroids are children. I mean, like, oh, we need more protein, right? I'm pretty sure if you don't take, like, if you want to gain muscle, I'm pretty sure you got pound protein, right? If you're a skinny guy and you want to put on muscle. You got pound protein, eat enough calories, and do the work. But if you take down about steroids, a whole different ballgame, I'm not saying you need

nothing, but you need a lot less, I think, right? But you don't probably know. I'm pretty sure you don't need as much protein, right? so why can't oh eggs are too expensive is steroid expensive i mean they have to be we can probably make a big vat of it in mexico somewhere these are kind of ideas like these these are ideas that actually help people these are ideas that save the world why is no one listening to me so you think um just we get kids on a regimen of steroids steroids yeah we get kids on steroids we get kids on steroids we get young adults, adults on sex regimes, you know, train them to meet people, by the way.

How about instead of teaching them the Pythagrium theorem, we teach them how to talk to a woman. Hello, how's your hair? Nice to meet you. Stuff like that. I mean, what a lovely tit you have. Look, man, you'd be weird of that, but if I said to you, that's a lovely tit, you wouldn't immediately stop talking to me. You'd go, well, thank you. And then you'd be afraid.

But the door is open. Well, it's one of those things. It's kind of an effective neg. Because, like, when you say, that's a great tit. Yeah. It's kind of like, you're thinking, like, which tit is better than the other one? It's not even a neg. See, nagging is just, it's insecure.

But with this, you're making, you're making a woman insecure. But you're not, you know, but you have plausible liability here. I'm not actually negating you. Right. You're not actually saying anything negative. Yeah. Oh, you have one nice eyebrow. Doesn't mean you don't have another.

You know, use language to your benefit. Trick women into liking you, but not into having sex with you. Because consent doesn't apply the conversation. You know, you can make someone like you, but then they have to decide to have sex with you. See the difference? Yeah, no, I... Teach people to be like... manish, but also gentle.

One of our favorite shows, the Americans, features a sequence where the two spies are being trained to basically have sex with anybody. Anything. From a, from a... From a beautiful woman to an old fat man. Exactly. Yeah.

Regardless of gender, regardless of... Not children, though. They don't show that. I guess this doesn't really come up. Like, a baby child to get secret. Oh, wait, actually, that does kind of come up later. I forgot that. Yeah.

Not a child But there's a bit of grooming involved Spoiler alert But yeah Like I don't know Maybe that would be good for us To make that part of education

What would mean you? No I don't you bang old Ben No for the country You know To be part of a young adult education Yeah Like it's like you know

It gets them out of their own head a little bit You let old I think what you're saying is you This is a bold idea You old people are alone and young people don't know how to get good at sex and relationships so we can bind the two and no one has to do it but if you're lonely well you can be uh if you're an old old band and you're lonely well you can you know be part of this and you think they're going to bang young hot women but they know what they're doing young hot women never have a problem so they should have thought this through these old men because what they're getting is just like incels who are willing to have sex with old men just get off not even gay right but it's still a tension it's still the comfort of warmth of a human body and they all do it willingly if you have Alzheimer's we're not going to let this happen and it teaches

you yeah what i gathered from this sure is that it teaches you how to compartmentalize the act of sex is that good so it's not necessarily like you know you're not lesser you won't be stressing out so much about like oh did i fuck the hottest woman or right am i the hottest guy It's not going to get different. It's just, it's just, I think, I think, I think, I think, I think, I think, I think, I think, I think, I think, I don't want to contradict you, uh, necessarily. But, you know, I do think there might be, might be a difference between not getting hung up on how quote unquote hot the person you're having sex with is. Yeah. And emotionally walling off the act of sex from the rest of your, um, id or consciousness.

Um, there might be a middle ground. But I like how you're thinking. You're thinking outside of the box. And that's good. Yeah. And the young people can decide you get stories out of it. You know, the old people give you stories. The whole experience is a story.

You can tell you when you have a first date. You know, these Tinder people don't know how to talk to each other, right? In real life. Imagine if you had all those that have, I've had sex with 16 people with the liver cancer. Yeah. Men and women. a couple of animals. And imagine if you knew that the person you were talking to you

had also had sex with, you know, some disgusting... Well, again, it's not compulsory. We're not going to do... You want to be compulsory? But it's highly suggested. Yeah, but again, the hot women and the hot guys aren't going to need it. We just create a... But we create a middle ground of people.

Instead of being an in-cell, you can just be, you know, a less, you know... It's not like there's... prime beef and nothing else it's not just prime beef and dog shit there's like great a and gray b great c or something i don't know what this is it's great to this you know bonds there's triple a bonds there's double a bonds there's b double b triple c so those are bonds you can buy whatever you want right so how come a sexual partner is either primo primo shit or you know or just an So, how about we have people who've learned the hard way or the, the soft way? Old people are soft, actually.

They don't have to be old people, though. You know, it's not all elderly people. No, yeah, of course not. Some middle-aged people. There could be a woman who looks okay, but she has a scar over her eye. There could be a guy who, you know, more or less all right, but like his hips are kind of womanly. Yeah.

Like, you know, there's a whole range of ugly and attractive features. It's not really much about learning on a stroke, right? It's not about sex per se. It's about treating people like people. And they don't want to have sex of you. So I've just solved the whole human reproductive problem that we're having in like fucking five minutes, ten minutes of ranting. But no one wants to listen to me and Lucy.

We have all the solutions, but no one's willing to play. Nobody wants to put any skin in the game. Right. They just want to put it, you know, or skin tags. It's not sad. It's sad that people are just too lonely. There's this whole, oh, speaking of efficiency, there's this whole thing in Gaza.

Remember the war? I do remember that, yeah. So Trump has met with Netanyahu, who is the head of the Jewish department, right? The Israel's? Yes, the prime minister of Israel. Right, correct. and, you know, they've had this war for a while

after that October 7th situation where a bunch of paragliders raped everyone at a concert and they responded by basically leveling Gaza the Israelis and Trump has met with Netanyahu and he said, we gotta get the Gazans out of here the Palestinians out of Gaza

and I think the AD, because it is like to be fair it is not great to live there right now it's been leveled in the hospitals and the tunnels were all shot to hell totally destroyed yeah so but he doesn't want him to come back he wants the other countries in the Middle East to absorb these people Egypt Jordan places like that England whatever um now what is the motive here people saying they want to develop it into what some kind of you were saying a Riviera a Riviera of the Middle East is what I got a better solution. That'll make everyone a little happier.

You can still make money of your war. You're decimating war to kill a lot of people. You can still make money off. I'm not against that. Look, America and the world are built on debt, right? And an expansion. So what am I going to do? But here's the plan.

We build on Gaza the world's biggest amusement park. Wow. Yes. It's going to be called Gaza Land. Gaza land So no one will forget the Gaza people Who they are, the Gossans Yes, the Gossans

People who are living, yes Right, that's their name People who, yeah The people who the people who is real took the land from It's the Gossans. Or the Palestinians. The Gossans. Yeah, okay, right.

So there'll be the Gossans. We'll call them the Gossans We can't have Palestinians and Gossens Like, it's either Palestine or it's Gaza Or you can't have both That's part of the problem here. No one even knows who you're supporting. The West Bank, the Gaza, so it's Gazaland.

All right. Now, it'll be an amusement park. It'll be a place where children from around the world can come and have fun and eat churros going roller coasters. It'll have 15, maybe 40 roller coasters, a lot. What's the biggest park in the world? Six Flags? Google is. Please answer this question for me with the Google.

What amusement park has the most roller coasters in the world? this is a wonderful we're taking a terrible war and we're having a nice conversation about Six Flags Magic Mountain Oh you're right How many is I have? 20

This will have 200 200 rollercoasters That's not gonna be great It doesn't seem like a lot of rollercoasters No it's bullshit It's pissy pants shit Right I want big roller coasters

I want a Batman roller coaster Like they used to have A Six Flags great adventure I want a Superman roller coaster That sucks Because Superman's dog shit I want to have a Looney Tunes roller coaster I want to have a brick and Morty roller

What are the things that we can do? What kind of roller coasters do we have? Well, I mean... A human sexual reproductive roller coaster Where you pretend you're a sperm And you're going into the ovula That would be amazing, honestly Because sperm kind of do a roller coaster thing, don't they?

Did you ever watch Luke Who's talking? There's movies where the babies talk And John Travolta and Curse the Alley are banging And he's a cab driver But the next movie's a pilot. Oh, I'm as a cab driver, but I'm a pilot now. Makes sense. Anyway.

But they always showed the beginning of the movie, the sperm traveling. So I have intimate knowledge, not intimate, whatever. I know it well. How sperm works. Imagine, imagine you're a sperm on a roller coaster and you're traveling into an egg at the end. That's incredible. That's one, this is one out of 200. I got a 199 more ideas like that.

I have an idea where you're a turd and you can come out of the ass. you're the one where you're food and you get bombing it up all sorts of things they're like 10 body ones Right We should have a few maybe religion ones in there Sure you're on you're into Jesus

What are you thinking? You got any of you? Well for the Christian one I mean maybe it could be a vertical one Where you go up and down the crucifix Sure You know maybe you could have one where it's like You know you're basically like

Righting Mohammed's winged horse to heaven Yeah the winged horse Yeah Why aren't we Muslims? That sounds awesome. It does sound pretty cool. I want to winged horse. Is that a Pegasai?

What was? Did he have a name? I mean, if he's riding Pegasus, that's dope. But it's probably a different name. If he stole that shit from the Greek, ancient Greeks, the Barak. B-U-R-A-Q, B-R-A-Q, brook. You'll put that guy in, sure. This horse looks dope.

Look, it's going to be in the Middle East, so you might as well have a few Muslim things. Muslim. Look, Jews, Christians, Muslims, everyone's welcome. No, yeah. Are you still imagining the Gossans being displaced? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. No one's on them back in. I mean, maybe they can get a voucher to the fucking go to the park.

I know the Israelis are sickles about that. Because for a second, I thought you were going to say, like, maybe they were going to be carnies or something. No, no, here's what they get. They get, this all sounds great, right? It's churros, it's fried Oreos. It's all the best things of America, and you get tapas.

Right. That's from Spain. You'll get, you'll get, uh, lotkas for the Jewish people, um, and the Polish people, right. Well, well, we got borscht, all sorts of foods. Yeager Schnitzel. Everyone's happy. I've, concerts, you know, sphere in Las Vegas, we'll build a few of those in there. It's the world's greatest place.

Trip clubs, if you want them, gay, straight, whatever. But there's going to be a lot of, to go with it, monuments. You know, like statues of children being hit by bombs and, like, hospitals being, like, leveled and crushing little kids. Interesting. And just, and carnage and just people, you know, Israeli soldiers are shooting into a tunnel blindly. So there'll be statues of that because we want to remember these people. Like, that's the rub. You have to, you know, it's not rub even.

It's a nice thing. So basically, like, you're on a ride. And then between on your way to the next ride, you're kind of walking through a. aside museum yeah and these really soldiers like you hear like they'll have sound effects too going you're not human to me you know something like that fun but what's wrong with this it's like it's like sour and sweet or hot and sweet what's they're they're salty and sweet it's salty it's sweet it's a it's a honey recipe peanut you know it's delicious that's sea salt and caramel that's what this is sea salt and caramel

museum park wow I mean this sounds I can't lie it sounds like a fun park we can build you build more condos on the water who gives a shit at the water enough with the condos on the water oh look it's blue oh oh I lived on the water oh this is amazing enough what was that for how about you how about you have a ranch with with sheep and that's the new the new condo I want my condo to be looking at sheep. They graze for sweaters. You know? I make my own cashmere sweaters.

A sheep I own. You're going to shear your own sheep? Yeah. Or I'll pay someone to do it, but they're my sheep. I'm just saying that's what being wealthy is all about. Have a bunch of shland. You know? Have a bunch of land.

Why not? What's the counterpoint? Um, well, look, it could cause, uh, this displacement. It might not be easy, you know, you might, nothing good is it ever easy. I'll tell you that much. There might end up being more death and destruction in the process. People are saying it could be another knock, but, you know, yeah, um, a nagba?

Yeah. Like when they, when they were first displaced and kind of sent to Egypt, but then, uh, also a bunch of them died, just lost their, you know. Is that no one name for the Holocaust? Um, I forget what it translates to, but Nagba. It doesn't seem like they like it. Yeah. Well, they had a churro.

Because churros are good. Churros are delicious. So, wait, will they be allowed to have a churro? Could they come into, like the displaced Palestinian? Well, drop them with parachutes. I don't know. They'll get some of the extra. They'll be, they won't be the fresh ones.

Look, if you want to start a country for the Gossens, then go ahead. I don't know how to do that. I only know how to operate inside capitalism, even though I don't really have any money. But I get the idea of capitalism. I don't get the idea of like start their country people everyone's trying to kill. I don't know how that works.

Israel gets it. The one people who were able to figure out were Israel. And like they don't tell anybody. You know, there's some irony in the fact that the one people who should be able to help these people, like figure it out, is the Israelis. Yeah. Although they would, you know, if we just some reason they don't want to.

I mean, do you not like roller coasters? I love roller coasters. All right. So what's the problem? I was looking at the New York Times before. And there was a thing about a vibrator. A vibrator. Yeah, it was like a...

What was this at home? I'm actually calling a bill collector. Not bill clerk. What do you call these people who call you all the time? I don't have any. Bill's just collecting. There's random people. Already, I mean, I just Googled this.

And already some weird. Wire color one. I'm the person the New York Times pays to test vibrators to ask me anything. I mean, it's this thing. It's like literally, the best vibrator is the one that's probably coming to mind right now. And you're talking about the magic wand vibrator. I thought these are the people who are saying the world was going to end of Trump Gala. I mean, and now he's here and he's doing all this stuff.

And you talk about vibrators. And you go and say, well, we can chew and eat gum at the same time. I mean, no, you can't. You can't shoot in the government at the same time. You obviously can't. It's either you got to fight this cause or you talk about vibrators. You can't do both. You can't get, try to get, like, like, Trump.

I mean, Trump banned, like, transgender people in sports. I'm not saying he's wrong, whatever. Not sports in general, but like you can't be in women's sports, right? Yeah. I mean, they're cool. They're fine, but you're going, he's going to do all this stuff. he's going to take social security and you're talking about a vibrator

I guess they That's probably the times If they were just people who were like If they were here going like I'm going to kill myself Trump is the president I'm going to jump up that building Of course in poor authority

That's what they are by the way Poor authority No one talks about that They set up shop across and port authority The worst place in the world I mean the inside of portory is fine But the outside is just people It's just

People's bothering you you have a quarter why would I have a quarter what do you mean I just ate three gumballs and I have one quarter left I don't have a quarter I have a dollar the cash of society didn't anyone tell you I wish I could like swight like there's a safe way to give money the homeless people through a card I don't trust them as well as a QR code maybe there's got to be an interim thing I don't trust them to like you know no I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm not a liberal enough for you that I don't trust some random homeless person to process my credit card properly and not steal for me I don't all right I want some third party to handle this where I can just you know

I can just I want to shoot them with a laser gun and with a dollar sign right like a laser pointer right you should be able to pointed things you want your money to like someone like yeah like someone has your money he's pointed their forehead and you just stay away stay away here's some money I'm a generous person I like to help people but I'm not going to talk to some person asking me for money

I'm going to discuss chaucer with them the Canterbury tails you want to do it before you can even like you know before you can even brush their shoulder like you want to do it from a block away I already got you with the money gun leave me alone

you might have COVID I hope you on a vlog Long COVID. Imagine giving money to someone who had long COVID. What a waste? Oh, goddamn waste that would be. So the sex toy thing.

Yeah. Like, when did the New York Times start reviewing sex toys? I feel like they just, that's the thing with it. They're just such a big operation. They could just come out and be like, here's our best hentai. You're not like a trusted hentai source.

Right. But people, a certain type of person, trusts them with anything, apparently. What is the New York Times thinking of this? like meth. Who wants to just like be reading about egg prices? Yeah.

And then right below there's a thumbnail going like here's the best best thing to shove up your ass today. Yeah, I'm not prude, right? But like there is a certain level of like just propriety. Decorum. Decorum.

We all know. We all want to get off here and there or every day. Whatever. Some of us are sexually active adults. It doesn't mean I want to read about it when I'm, you know, when I'm learning about

you know wheat prices or you'll use it egg prices I didn't really change it much it's changed enough to take it from you wheat prices egg prices gum prices has gum gone up in price gum never seems to go up the gum is very reliable gum is great why these kids get gum in the morning how do you eat less we have too many fat kids for they eat less eggs you know how many make them oatmeal yeah oh those are always shit oh i can't make you pancakes you shouldn't be eating pancakes right yeah can't how about you take away the calories and people who don't need it and you give it to the poor people is that socialism forget it um anyway i'm just saying happy valentine's like everyone

happy valentine's day what um the super bowl's coming up what you got what should we throw a Super Bowl party? That would be nice, yeah. I would love to have a big, big fat stripper at our Super Bowl party. Why a big fat one? What? Because they're blocked the screen. I want to have a stripper that just bothers people.

I don't really care about football. I don't care about Taylor Swift and her team. And, you know, and does Chapel Rowan have a team? Chapel Rowan should start sucking off someone on the other team. Or like, or are you now? I don't know if she's a, you know, lesbian or not. Whatever she does. Where's the women on the team?

That's a problem. All right. Well, if she's straight. People seem to think she should be, like, talking about gay stuff. I guess she's gay. I mean, she's kind of goth, but... No, I think she's gay. Oh, is she gay?

I don't know. I don't care. Who's not gay? Who's a not gay woman? That's hot. Now, I was about to say, Alan degenerate. Charlie XX? I'm not sure.

I want to see dueling. Kate Hudson. What's that? She's like 60 years old. What is he talking about? I need a hot young, you know, I'm not saying hot, like, you know, like a popular woman. Hmm.

Um, how about, Charlie SCX? Okay, Charlie SCX. She should, who's, who's, who's doing the Phillies? The, the, the, the, the, the Philly Eagles, the Philadelphia Eagles, right? The Pennsylvania Eagles are in the Super Bowl. The, Kansas City Chiefs. Of course. You know, the dominant team of our error.

The Joe Mon, Travis Kelsey. No, Travis, Kevin was the real one. The one that actually makes them win. Mahomes is the Joe Montana of our time. Remember football Grandaddy Supreme? Early episode. Oh, yeah, classic. Football, was it, football granddaddy Supreme?

Mm-hmm. No. Yeah. Whatever. The point is, Um, Mahomes is good. The Eagles, I don't know who's.

on that team who's who's on the eagles who could have charlie xex bedded why what will this what will this improve exactly because everyone needs to care that the taylor swift's in and in the box right you know in the owner's box watching the game so why is the other the other team needs a mascot too right uh and then again yelan hurts sure that guy let him date charlie xxx yeah sure i mean yeah they should all have a pop star girl i'm gonna have a lon musk and his wife i'm assuming his wife is american american born citizen perhaps white even i don't know i'm gonna have mom musk support your wife to whatever country she's biologically from a hundred years ago unless you fucking dump her and have sex of charlie s the x on camera before the super bowl

whatever this is we get off a topic here the point is i want a fast tripper at our super bowl party and I want to just have her just shaking her ass and bothering people while they're trying to watch the game I've been not inviting friends because my friends don't only watch football I got to get people I know I kind of know who watch football I'm gonna have a stripper harassed

them and I'll just have a bullhorn and they ask me to sit down and be body positive you know it don't matter she's fat she's a little person she's doing a job right also have a cat just throwing a cat at people I don't know I'm talking about anymore it's getting hot in here why is our fire alarm keep going off um you can't Google that

it keeps going off and our landlords won't do anything about it I keep changing the batteries it doesn't work it's like wired into the building and the worst part is the sprinklers never go off so I don't know what what happened we try to almost burn the building down one time with our with our pressure cooker or whatever no it's a crack pot the instapot right and then and the fire department came and the sprinklers which you can see in our building we have sprinklers they never go off so i don't know what's happening oh yeah we're not gonna if there's a fire we're going to burn i don't want to burn it after my sleep that's a worst way to go i mean you know i i just kind of feel i've always felt deep down yeah And this might not be very rational. But I've always felt deep down that if there was a fire around and smoke going up everywhere.

Yeah. You know, I'd wake up in time to scurry out. Well, I mean, science, I like to think that, too. I'd like to think that anything that kills people I wouldn't die from. So that's why we're, you know, we work together. Yeah. Oh, you're going to shoot me with a gun? What's that going to do?

Put a hole in me? Cool. You know? I'm not sucking a gun off. that's always my answer um uh kendrick lamar is going to be headlined

Kendrick lamar the man who outed Drake as um well whatever it is Kendrick Lamar seems to think that Drake is a pedophile a certified pedophile according to him I don't want to get sued by Drake but that's that that's he made that song

we kept saying that and did Drake respond I guess he might have but he see Kendrick Lamar seemed to win that battle public relations was oh yeah it would be cool they had drake and him duel with pistols oh damn or just war bikes but i mean i prefer pistols but yeah you think he's gonna talk shit about drake again at the super bowl that would be so damning that would be i mean that because drake is sitting there going like i was on the grassy and this guy really took a piece out of me

really you know with that song you know they're not like us they're not like us does he mean like like pitos oh maybe i don't know i which i don't mind i don't mind somebody lyrics go always go over my head i look at songs i've listened to for a thousand times i barely know what they're saying so i know when he when he's certain things parts of the song he's like the beat stops he just starts screaming it i don't get that but all the all the little lyrics i don't necessarily get if there's one group of people i'm okay with othering a little bit it's probably pedophiles. Yeah, I don't have a problem being non-inclusive to pedophiles.

They can go, they can go scratch. If you ask me, they can get, go to the hell. That would be my campaign speech for president. Paraphiles, if you don't mind me saying so, can go right

to hell. And it was cheering and I'm spitting. Enjoy that. I'm, I want to get that story too. If you like me so much as president, why don't you let me spit on you? But that it's a nice thing. Here's some of my spit. Oh, you know, you can just take it and rub it on your head. It's nice. I can shake your hand. Why do you think my hand is so much cleaner than my spit? Most people's spit is probably cleaner than your hands. I mean,

it might be, it might seem grosser to you. But people's insides are actually cleaner than your outsides. I don't say they have AIDS or something. Right. Well, I think it's usually the reason people don't want to be spit on primarily is that it seems degrading it's like when somebody's spitting at you their face contorts a lot of the time and they're doing it angrily how does one so ignorant is what you're saying right ignorant people who just who lived your life based on superstition how would you go about spitting on somebody in a way that was you know charming or complimentary puh like that it's like up you do it

part in my life spit on your wife and maybe you do that you actually say the puh part so you spit and then you say it sounds nice

pur pardon me I don't know I mean I'm just trying I'm trying to get things going don't question these things right we're not living in a world

where you question things anymore just go with what I'm saying all right old people sex party if they want it, uh, spit if they want it, um, big stripper ass, duels. These are the things you should have learned from today. I've, you seem, you seem uncomfortable. I'm, I'm looking forward to all of this, uh, being executed, but, you know, um,

well, go ahead. Before you, before you refute, before you start your reputation, your dissent, don't forget. big sandwich huge sandwich not enough of those around oh just bigger sandwiches in general well just the big hero sandwiches you get a Super Bowl parties oh right yeah you know one year my parents threw a Super Bowl party they weren't even that in the football but they got and they got there's a place with stuff a bagel on Long Island and they and they probably still do it they had a hero that was on a giant bagel oh imagine that Italian Sam Italian hero sandwich on a giant bagel.

That sounds good. And you cut the bagel into pieces as a sandwich. I prefer the Italian bread. I think it's just a gluttonist weird thing. No one, it's not better on a bagels, too, but it's too thick. Maybe we can use it to kind of like, look, we need, we need all sorts of contraptions to really make this work. Sure.

Like anything good. But like, you know, maybe we could, we could actually use it to kind of as like a frame around the stripper's ass. Ooh. And you're eating out of her ass, but also licking the bread and the bag. bagel. I love it. I think it's great. It's very progressive. And when people start complaining about her blocking the TV, is like, well, do you want, do you want to watch the game or do you want to eat a bagel sub? You got to make up your mind.

Life's about choices. Mofal. Mofa. Okay. Learn to live in a new world. I wish that all for Anthony. Living in a new world. let it all I should put a clip out of that Patreon a few months we were talking about him I took him the task

and knowing only people in the Patreon know about it I forgot to plug the Patreon Patreon.com like Frankump I can't put it every week anyway any closing dots

maybe Oliver Anthony can perform at the Riviera of the Middle East or Gazaland I think Alaranti would be lucky to play Gaza land, all right? And he better to try that horse shit where he's like, don't go to the Cotton Night Joe show or the tickets to. We're going to charge where we charge.

And if you tell anyone who will have you put in jail. Well, this one's all the rich men, jail, motherfucker. Done. We'll send the Mossad after your ass. Yeah. I mean, we'll have the Massad be security. And we'll give true. Ocho rose to the Gazans and also their memories be preserved by these statues of horror.

Pure horror. It's a good balance. It's a good balance because nothing good is going to happen. The best you can do is remember. No one's saying like change history. Just stop caring about it. Right? It's important to know history, but like you're not going to fix it.

I'm not going to fix the world now to reflect what we did. and that's fine it puts everyone on the same page the problem is at some point we convince everyone that like no it's all good now and you're you

it's all everything's better go back I mean just go back to living like God the king does what he does we can do about

throw them out that's why I think that's why I think a democracy doesn't matter it's good it's a nice thing closing thoughts

I mean um obviously there's been a lot it's it's we're we're picturing solutions for a horrific time yeah but uh you know you got to make the most of things you got to keep an optimistic

worldview put on a happy face we played that from that's going to be played that's from by by birdie And it's going to be playing 24-7 at Gosland. Yeah. Per happy face. Love it.

Remember, thank you for tuning in. Remember, you can like and subscribe, and you really should. It's the least you could do, and it really, it's, it's, just do it. And it's the most you can do. It's not the most you can do. Don't tell people with that. There's more. And it's the least you can do for nothing.

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All right? We'll be back before Valentine's Day But start buying your flowers now. Start buying your chocolate now. Start buying your goddamn bagel sub now. Because life's not getting any better If you don't fix it yourself. Have a great week.