Kump - Ep. 209 Robots vs Humans

Episode Date: April 24, 2025

Robots are racing. Volcanoes are erupting. The Ice Bucket Challenge is back—and Ray wants to kiss a homeless man to cure leprosy.In this episode of KUMP, Ray & Lucie unpack:– The world’s first humanoid robot marathon– A ride that turns Pompeii into a theme park– How to fix volcanoes with giant garbage pipes– The return of viral stunts (and the launch of our own)Subscribe to get the bonus episodes on Patreon: patreon.com/raykumpcomedy podcast, satire, current events, Ray Kump, AI, volcanoes, ice bucket challenge, viral stunts, absurdist humor, leprosy, robots, tech, dystopia 00:00 — Robots, Volcanoes & Civilization Collapse01:15 — The Humanoid Half-Marathon (And Why It’s Bleak)05:00 — iPads vs Human Dignity at McDonald’s08:00 — Can We Afford a $6K Robot Co-Host?11:15 — Volcano Hacks: Ray’s Lava-Cement Solution15:10 — Roosevelt Island Garbage Tubes & History Rant18:45 — Should We Bring Back Lepers? (Bit Gets Out of Hand)22:10 — The KUMP Cure: Kiss-a-Homeless-Man Challenge26:30 — Ice Bucket Challenge Returns, Kinda28:30 — What Even Is ALS? (And Why Lou Gehrig Got Robbed)31:00 — Toxic Friendship Advice Involving Lasagna34:00 — Feed Your Friend Until She’s Powerless37:00 — Life Advice: Never Get Sick or Expect Anything39:30 — Passionate Kisses for Social Change42:00 — The Homeless Challenge: Clooney, Erdogan, and Leprosy45:30 — Can You Sue Someone for a Hashtag?47:00 — Vaccine Rants, Polio Carnage & The First Car Crash50:00 — FDR vs The Depression: A KUMP-Style Debate53:00 — The Ice Bucket Scam & Return of Viral Stunts56:00 — What Would Your Robot Butler Do?59:00 — Wrapping Up: Subscribe, Patreon, and Robot Apocalypse

The humanoid, the half-humanoid robot marathon? What did they call this thing? Just bleak? The bleak run? This is like the regular marathon, but they cut off half the course that humans would run on and put and had these little robots. So everyone's got to be crammed together. Like it's like it's a train, a rush hour.

You know, no one can enjoy a nice jog in the park because some robot, you got to get wide, you can't, no one can bump into the half. midget robot running on a marathon. First of all, why is it even a half marathon? The battery can't even last longer than a half marathon. They couldn't get it the last 26 miles. This is not the biggest flex ever, you know, you would think. Imagine losing a race to a robot the size of a child.

I feel like it's intentionally degrading, you know. No, they're rubbing your face. Like, you're nothing to us. We don't really value humanity in the way that you think, uh, in the sense like, you know, you're worth anything. But then again, what are we do here? We have a little robot dogs. And that's how we,

this, you know, is this the arms race we're looking at? Are we looking at an arm, a Chinese American arms race of like pointless machines, making our lives worse? This is the extension of like, hey, when you go at McDonald's now, instead of talking to someone who's, you know, on drugs and just kind of,

in a canatonic state, you know, who can't really understand your request for a fish fillet, you have a, you have a talk to an iPad, which somehow seems worse. I'd rather have the person. At least you can feel superior

to the person who doesn't know what day it is, trying to feed you a cardboard sandwich. Yeah. I mean, I was always polite, but I mean, yeah, you believe, in your head, you know, I didn't get nothing. Because you're nothing. It's the one.

One thing you had was to feel better than the person handing you a sandwich full of styrofoam. It's all we had in America, and they took it away and said, talk to this tablet. And the guy, can you at least calibrate the screen? No. And much like that, we have robots who, uh, did they win by the, what is the story here? It's slow and steady. The robots have a long way to go. I think they finished.

I think some of them tipped over. Human runners averaged two and a half hours to complete the race. In contrast, the fastest robot needed over five. Robots. So we've made everyone's lives just bleak for nothing, just for kicks. Robots had difficulty adjusting to slight changes in terrain and required remote operator support for stability. So these are like drones. These are like, you know, they take their drones from Afghanistan and Iraq.

I guess they were the Chinese this is where they have them who are they using drones on whatever they took the batteries out of that they popped into these into these you know

life size you know my robots Robbie the robots remember that guy? Yeah what I guess one of those I guess that's the thing is like it doesn't matter if you can adjust to little terrain changes

once they put like you know once they put the gun hands on yeah once they you know well look I mean that's the thing this is all fun and cute. Oh, how look, it's like when you watch Apocalypse now, right? It's like, you know, oh, that kid looks cute and I throw a grenade at you. It's just, you can't win. Are we still competing fairly? That's a fair point. While the robots clearly lag behind humans

this time, ethicists raise concerns about what happens when machines surpass us in physical domains. What do you think happens? We all live in harmony? It's not the robots. That's the thing everyone gets wrong about these stories you know it's not the robots that were like trying to you know oh the matrix they figured out they went sentient why would the machine care by the way the idea of machines are like you know evil when they go so even if it is evil it's like why would I need to go out and like have like air and like you know and like look at and look at all your fast food places and like what do you think it wants a park what you think it wants it wants an ocean an ocean view it's happy being in a box it doesn't care you think just because it's self-aware like

hey i can do whatever i want like oh i can't what grab a beer what do you think a machine needs nothing oh you shouldn't be doing this to me they don't even think that that's how dumb people are they think machines care like they think that we're bothering them they don't even they don't even track to them they're like we're like hey where i fight chinese food shut up here like that takes them can you write my thesis for me for college whatever i just you know they fart it out the problem is that it's the governments that are using these robots against you that's what it is we're all waiting for a singularity meanwhile they're going to shove you in the ground as soon as these things can you know whatever you do for a living right code they can already do that

what can't they do we're really on borrow time aren't we it's a lot of like i think that this is the lead up to trying to replace a lot of the kind of menial labor that's, like, simpler in some ways than, like, there's something like coding, but also, like, can't be replaced as easily. Well, like, sewing. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, you're already basically making your shoes and stuff. Like, the people are just there to kind of assemble the piece, like, right? Like, when they, when they, you know, the, the CAD machine prints out these little Nike swooshes.

I don't know how it works. Do you see me in a sweatshop? No, I don't know. They wouldn't want me. The point is, it's going to, it's, it's, it's, why? are we allowing these things equal footing? Don't give him legs. Easy thing in the world.

They don't need arms and legs. Where did this come from? This idea, because you know who needs that? Some guy who wants a hot toddy in the middle of the day. Yeah. And he doesn't want to pay a, you know, a normal servant. You're right? I mean, at a certain point, you're going to be able to get servants and, and, and, and

butlers at Walmart. I mean, I would love a robot butler. Well, you won't be able to afford it. What are you talking about? Well, this guy, the guy in this video, in this video, he was saying that one of the little little guys, the little robots, it runs you like $6,000. That's it? Yeah.

I can get one for six grand? Yeah. From who? From where? Where does this happen? I don't know what company it is, but he said, I know he said sex keg. I'll look, we'll put that, we'll make a Patreon incentive or something. Sign up for the Patreon.

If we get, in a certain point, we'll buy the robot. and he'll co-host a show with us. I want a robot child laborer. Dude, this whole brand was predicated on the fact that I can't afford this crap. But if we can get in the game. Oh, speaking of the Patreon, you know, do us a favor. You know, welcome this comp, you know, like subscribe to the show if you could. On all platforms, you know, it's nice.

Because I want to dress my little robot butler up in a little tucks. Yeah. I want to make them all cute. We need you to subscribe to grow the show. And then people join the Patreon. We get the bonus episode every week, which is nice, right? It's very small, like five bucks a month to get an extra episode every week. That's really, I think, a great deal.

And beside the point, because what you really want is for that revenue to go towards a robot buying. And then we can, and then we could, you know, really get to the bottom of, you know, how this robot's going to end my life. Because it's going to happen. I will, my life will end at the hands of a robot if I'm lucky. I just wanted to be clean. I would love to look up into the lifeless eyes of a robot as I die

instead of some selfish crying trial. Oh, yeah. You think your child's going to kill you? You're your alternative with a child taking you out? Well, I was imagining him being more with my family in hospice. Oh, okay.

I thought you're like envisioning a clockwork orange scenario or city of God. But that's, yeah, I hear you. No, it's like, because it's still bitterness, you know. do you know they're not taking pleasure in it there's something nice about that it's just all business with the robots yeah some people their last moments they're looking into eyes filled with hate yeah not us we'll be looking into just ones and zeros and something that's indifferent towards your entire existence it thinks the fact that you think you're alive and have a soul is laughable

you know I mean oh but you don't have a soul what am I what do you even know calculus and some People do. Not me. I have to say no. I love to, no, exactly. You know, just be like, do you, do you know how, do you even, do you even know what we had to drop first, a hammer or a feather? And I'm like, oh, the hammer. It's same. I think what that's on the moon, right? See, I don't even know how physics works. That was my example of physics. Which drops first a hammer or a feather. That's all I remember. Some half remembered physics problem. I don't know. What's, if you could have one. robot like for if they were broken down by tasks like you know for instance we had like a robot but all it would do is wash dishes it's kind of like people you know you can hire these like cheap labor people uh and i don't think i i i'm not doing it i'm not part of the economy in that way in the meaningful way right i don't create jobs so i mean but i'm just saying like you know you can't just hire someone and they do everything i mean some people try that but that's just like you know it's You get a dishwasher, you get a waiter, right?

So translate that to people, I mean, the robots. I mean, look, one very inaccessible luxury. Yeah. Most people only dream of having is like a nice personal chef. Right. A robot personal chef could be cool. That would be great. If I, if six, I mean, probably six K is that it was going to robot reach the counter.

Can you pull that guy up again for a second? The little guy? I'll put him on screen since you find them. The little, yeah, this guy. So just leave him. Yeah, leave him static. But this guy here, I don't know if that guy reaches the counter.

He's going to be making you just, you know, a bunch of, he's, you know, he's going to cooking your food in the ground. He's just going to, like, throw a bunch of slop on the floor and then, like, you know, covered in kerosy and let a match. You know, oh, he accidentally burned a house down. No, it wasn't an accident. He just, so how fat moron I was and said,

this is better for you. Hey, robot, can you make me, can you make me another ramen peanut butter sandwich like what all right let me just wrap this up I just wrap this up kid I don't know it's uh what like what what would you want to do what what would you want to outsource your robot I'd want a robot to just kind of hit like beat me up like fight me like make me tougher you know you want a robot kato I want to what was kids because is that pink panzer thing yeah yeah the guy who tags him I didn't really watch that movie.

Is it good? As a kid, I never liked the cartoon, and I didn't understand it was a different thing, and there's a whole thing. So, I'm sorry, but Cato would just attack them randomly. And makes them stronger. That's the idea?

I think that's the idea. Well, I guess I've just inadvertently written the Pink Panther again. Because, yeah, I wanted a robot just to make me tough. You know, like, kind of like in Radio Flyer with the King, you know, and Bobby. And that movie seemed to have this weird thing where, like, oh, the King was a bad guy. But I think Bobby was just a really. weak kid those kids he probably thought those kids stunk

remember radio fly for a second I mean it's a this movie is based on the idea that this abusive stepdad is like they have to they build a plane out of a what do you call it

like a wagon because he's getting away from his abusive dad I don't know this is this is radio flyer here this is some pictures you remember this movie if you don't remember it whatever point is they made him seem like a bad guy I think he was fine I wish my dad would hit me like that

old school just make me a better man so I'm not I'm not sitting there getting getting you know and run by some robot hassling I don't need it but yeah that's a good point they're not really tall enough to do anything

they're just they're probably only gonna be good for just spying on you they're just gonna be snooping through your panties and your underwear and you're just like you know, it's like, oh, can you clean my apartment? And they're just sniffing. And it's like collecting data so they can sell your stuff. When you go to the mall and you get a synabon, they'll pump in some kind of weird chemical

that makes you, it reminds you there's some girl you asked that when in eighth grade. And she told you to get lost. I'm like, you're citing the ploff of adolescence now. I think we watched that this week. I don't. That was a God. That show sucks. Yeah.

I mean, I always say it sucks. I mean, it's a, I don't understand the, the, the, level of like, you know, there are people that they were going, like, you know, thinking they just said public policy based on the show adolescents. I just thought it was, it was, I mean, it was well-made. You'd be a little harsh. Yes. I like Stephen Graham.

You're like that woman we were watching. Well, why don't you like adolescents? No, it's great. Yeah, we should pull it up. We'll play that on the Patreon. We'll get pulled off of YouTube for that, for these references. What is going? Crazy days of technology.

we have the first story is this robots we're following it up with maybe the complete opposite of a robot the primordial force of nature this this this is a volcano yes i've never i don't know how volcanoes work but do we have this uh did you ever go on the escape from pompey ride what do you know what is what does that mean in pa is that in italy where what are you talking about i i forget where it is but it's There's six flags, I think, had it maybe for a while. Grant, you went in Jersey? Maybe. It's an escape from Pompey ride where you're riding through the ruins of Pompeii.

That sounds horrible. That sounds like, I mean, are you- It's very disrespectful. Yeah, that seems like a, like, can we just take any other genocides that happen or mass killings and just like make a ride out of it? Was it at least a roller coaster or are you going slow through it? It's a water ride, actually. A war.

It's ironic. That water rides when people are burning the death. That substance that really evokes lava. Sure. Was the water supposed to be to lava? Are you floating down Pompeii? I think the idea is like you're kind of like, you're floating down the river as the city's going to shit.

Yeah. Like, and, you know, you're narrowly kind of escaping the carnage. They didn't have any people, you know, petrified people on the ride. Right. I think they thought that would be too scary. Sure. It's expensive. It's probably expensive to make.

Yeah. You know, I'm sure they had like some yachts. I don't think the people who made the ride from Pompey knew I understood the gravity of Pompeii. Do we have a picture of the volcano or video of it or something? So this is the, let's play this. This is the Kila Klauggu. Do we know how you say this? This is, uh...

Just play it. Is that playing? Yeah, it's just the footage. These glasses make it hard to see. I'm sorry. It's just the eruption. There's not much head. It's just kind of a very, it's very boring.

That's it, huh? It's just 20 seconds. I mean, I don't know. I was told this was like a big deal of this volcano. Apparently it's starting in December. Why can't we just shove cement down there? Apparently, like a lot of these volcanoes, like a Pesuvius. Yeah.

It's kind of due for a giant eruption. They've been saying every decades. What about it's, you know? That's like people saying, you know, oh, eggs cause cancer and they don't cause cancer. And, you know, it changes up. oh do keto now do now do paleo now don't eat meat you know oh the volcano is going to burn it's just lava i mean the whole built isn't the whole planet made a lava we actually it's a problem but the whole planet's made of this crap right well in the core yeah yeah but we don't

we don't live in the core well we don't live in the core but why why don't we just drill down to the core and and put some like release valves in there or something why are we just letting these natural. Yeah, if you wet, it's like a pimple. If you just leave it there, it'll just get infected and just get work. If you pop it, it's fine. And so, you know, don't pop it too hard because you'll moll your skin. But, you know, it's like a

why can't we just shove like a bunch of here. Here's what I would do. Find every volcano that's out there and just get a bunch of pipes. You know, like the kind of pipes that you go through a tunnel with the Holland tunnel or the Midtown Tunnel or any tunnel. Just big boiling pipelines.

We get oil pipelines, like the Keystone Pipeline, and we lead them into the volcano, and we just dump cement in there, like, nonstop all the time. At a certain point, it's got to clog up, right? If not, then we have something else in our hands. If the volcano can't handle, it won't get clogged up, then why aren't we just shoving everything in there? All the garbage. Why don't we just have giant pneumatic tubes that go from the garbage? dump to the volcanoes.

I don't know. I mean, I probably, it would probably hurt us in some way. I don't think it would. I think people are lazy. I think people are more interested in getting more, and getting more fossil fuels so they can fund their, you know, the pickup trucks, but no, no, there's no incentive to just build a giant tunnel system, you know, you know, you're talking about the pneumatic tubes, like at the bank, when they shove the thing in the, in the little thing and it goes up and

Yeah, air driven by air. giant thing like that's actually on i believe on roosevelt island in the middle of manhattan they use that for garbage that's one way you deal with garbage it's having those so it's possible it does seem like that would be a good solution to the garbage problem if it's if you can pull up if you can find a picture of roosevelt like write diagram roosevelt island garbage tubes see if anything comes up i was reading about this recently but uh is there anything uh Yeah, these are the tubes here. You can see them.

They're basically, and it's not, it's not without their problems. But that's because, like, they build all this, all the houses and stuff on top of them. It's built in the 50s. And it still basically works. This guy,

you know, they have to, like, deal on maintenance. But I'm saying now, you just have them going from a dump to, you could just, you'd have segments. You could unclog it.

You wouldn't have to have, you wouldn't have some, you know, college kids living in the dorm on top of it or whatever else happens on Roosevelt Island. It used to be like a, like a tuberculosis. thing or something, right?

It's a cure, there was a hospital there. I used to send all the... The old people are typhoid or whatever. Or the lepers. Go whatever the lepers in Roosevelt Island. Why don't we bring back lepers while we're at it? And if it gets bad, we just...

Well, I'm like a thrown in the volcano, but you know, it's there. Why? This seems like a good idea. Have a hashtag vote. Comment down. Tell me why in the comments. We want more interaction on the show. We want people to get and get, get, get, get,

get some skin in the game, you know what I mean? So tell me why. If I'm wrong, if I'm such a crazy lunatic, if I'm such a big moron, if we're wanting to put pneumatic tubes into a volcano so we can shove our garbage down there, will tell me why I'm wrong, hot shot, because I don't think I am.

Counterpoint? Yeah. If we were still dealing, because lepers are like the quintessential kind of ostracized people. right sure uh when you treat a person bad like you're treating them like a leper right and ironically like the original the o g and like the most appropriate though it's like you know everything else is like well it's kind of seems immuane but like a leper can make you a leper right so it's kind of like

yeah i mean it's the most understandable it's the least like like you know uh the least dick move but yeah but you're basically the original ostracized person sure uh if they were back yeah Do you think they'd be like, you know, do you think they'd be getting roasted on X? Well, they would be that period. But then they would become, I believe, much like, you know, they would become the, they would be the Andrew Tate Lepper. Right. You know, the leper who goes, like, they would start doing the whole, like, you know, the ratios. Like, you know, this percentage of women are only tracking this percentage of men.

None of them from lepers. You know, they're the whole, that whole thing. You know, and hey, you got to take, you got, you know, you have to trick them into being. with a leper whatever these rules are that people say bro just work out bro just shower bro I'm a leper I don't got no nose my skin keeps falling off when I do squats

what is this you tell me I just have to have a nice personality my my face is a soup I got soup for a face is that wrong there's some leper out there is going to be offended now I'm going to get canceled because I, you know, I talk smack to lepers.

I mean, that would be a great. I mean, honestly, why don't I do that? We'll get back. Well, I'm going to do a stand-up special. I don't know where. I'll come to a stand-up. Well, there you go. Lepers.

The leper show. The leper special. It's just me doing roasting a bunch of lepers. We find every leper. I mean, there might be millions of them for all I know. There's parts of the world where they're having, oh, we're curious. just 500 years ago, yeah, when we didn't get the memo. You wouldn't give us insulin, whatever the problem is.

Right. So I was overstating. I can't get every leper into the show. Me, maybe. Can we see how many lepers are out there? How many lepers are in the world? Purs still exist. Well, of course they still exist.

Oh, wow. So, wow. That's actually way more than I thought. It's like over 150,000. Okay. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, you know, what's the O-D? two arena seat maybe

you can do a bunch of shows it was like 25 that yeah I mean look probably not it won't be but we'll get a good amount of lepers I'll get a thousand lepers and you on stage in a would you be bare or would you wear a hazmat suit naked do you mean like well you know

would you be exposed oh well I'll talk to a doctor's first and you know and RFK Jr and you know I'll see what's up right I'll get their advice but yeah I'll probably wear a hazmat suit you know i'm just saying i'm also not going to trust the doctors necessarily he's like no you'll be fine they'll what you know i mean how many lepers are you cured you know what we doing so i'm not

yeah i'm not playing games here i don't want to be a leper but no no hate i'm not hating anyway oh but it's curable now well cure oh not just preventable but it's curable yeah so what's it wrong why can't we just give them the cure I mean, I'm not trying to solve every social problem, right? I'm not trying to feed the whole world, right? But we can't just, like, not one billionaire, just can't say, hey, you know what? I wiped out leprosy. Like, you know, who was like a Mark Cuban type guy, right?

Like, he's like a billionaire, but not one of the big ones. And he had the Dallas Mavericks, but then he sold it, right? So it's like, you know, well, else you, cure that would be the best thing to do because you could say Bill Gates, what did you do? Like, well, I did X, X, Y, and D in Africa didn't help anything. That probably did, to be fair to Bill Gates and who knows what else he's up to. But the point is, you know, he didn't cure anything yet. I don't think.

No. But, like, you've barked. And there were some, I think there were some, like, legit. No, they did a bunch of stuff. I mean, where, like, it was like 85% of this disease is wiped out. Well, that ain't wiping it out. I want, if I'm a billionaire, if I got $1 billion, I'll just be like, yeah, how much does it cost to, like, give 100,000 people leper poison, whatever? With the over the opposite of leopard poisonous.

I'd be a bad financial planner. I was reading about the, it was like, it was the first or second or something like polio vaccine. Yeah. And it just like, it just gave a shit done a kid's polio. Oh, right. Yeah. It was like polio or somehow something worse than polio. Well, look, I mean, yeah.

Look, these things always start out. People try to use that as an example. Like, what's the first one? I mean, like, what was the first car probably, like, crashed every time he drove it. I don't know who made the first, no one even knows he made the first car. We're talking about the Model T, but that's like 15 years later or something. They're other cars, and people, they probably just, they probably just carnage, you know? Yeah.

Carnage from the first car. The first plane, the Wright brothers, what happened on the second flight? We were talking about the first flight, a Kitty Hogg with the Wright brothers, right? What happened the second time? They don't talk about that, you know why? Why? 18,000 people died. They crash right to the Eiffel Tower.

You know, who knows? I'm just saying it's like, you know, don't throw the baby out with the lepers. Sure. No, I mean, it's, it was a funny. It's not funny, but it's an interesting example in part because, like, the polio vaccine is kind of undeniable.

You know, like, you know, what eventually came out. I mean, a lot of people like FDR. Mm-hmm. I know you're like anti-FDR, but like, you know, so you think it's undeniable. It's like, yeah, I mean, one of our great presidents had a, Now, people go, he caused the Great Depression.

It's up for debate. You know, I mean, because there's the crash and the, you want me to get into this? You want me to parts this out? The point, some people think that the price control, I mean, honestly, Hoover started it. The price controls and the different, you know, things they try to do to, you know, keep the malinvestments from being liquidate. Let's not talk about this. It'll get robots. We don't want to get mired in the words here.

FDR's a hero, whatever. Let's just give him the vaccine. What else? We had some other things going on here. Right. Oh, speaking of blast from the past. So we go from lava, which is pretty old, right?

Old as, all this time. This is not as old, but still pretty old. The ice bucket challenge is back. Really? You know this. You put it on the thing. Well, the first one was, Well, the first one was very successful.

It was, you know, it cured ALS, so it makes sense. It didn't cure ALS. The ALS is still here. I have ALS. Oh. I think. I'm become a hyperchondriac. I don't know.

What is ALS? It didn't even really raise awareness for ALS. Because, I mean, honestly, like, because I still don't really, it's Lou Gehrig's disease, but what is it? You're in a wheelchair, but a lot of people are in wheelchairs. I don't know. Who decided that it would raise more awareness for a time? to be called ALS than Lou Gehrig's disease. Yeah, I just don't, I just think they don't want jocks running things and having,

you know, like some nerd scientists is like, we're not, I'm not going to, like, they get everything, right? They get, they get the women and the fun and then it gets to be confident and they get to like their body, but I also get to give them a disease. Well, hey, I'll give it an acronym. Screw. Screw. It's like, it's like given a LeBron James, like the Nobel Prize for literature.

But we don't. I bet you don't you have enough? King James. Now you got, we got to write a book about, you know, getting gas and, and in,

in, in, in, in game four of every finals against the Mavericks. Back in 2010 or whatever. You ain't McDonald's before every game

and you got gassy until you finally, until you and Jane, figure out how to win. You see my point? He doesn't deserve that. Have you ever heard the, you know, the famous, like, Luke Erich speech? Wow.

I confused with the Ted Williams one. What was Luke? He was like, ah, it hurts. Ah, I wish I could walk. Oh, I used to love walking so much. Well, that may have been what he said later in the illness, yeah. I was when you retire from baseball? Yeah, I consider myself the luckiest man.

That is him? Okay, I wasn't sure if I was Ted Williams or not. Okay. No, it's fine, yeah, I'm no, you won't find it. Can we find it? I'll play it. I'm the luckiest man because I I'm actually, I love sitting. Here we go. Up an amazing mark by playing in 210030 consecutive games then a fatal disease attacked baseball's iron man. You know, this is a commentator who's used to saying some pretty heinous stuff probably stadium, touched two tears by the tribute, Gary made his last public appearance. For the past two weeks, you've been reading about a bad brag.

Today, I consider myself the luckiest man on the face of the earth. Categorically done true. I mean, it's just an idiotic thing to say. So that's why there's a huge pause there, because they're like, what? I thought you were dying why he says luckiest all right and they're like

we'll give it to him that's why you had like a second pause there they're like well we can't not clap for the guy but he's like he said it's it's already this is a real man he's focusing on the on the positive he's not letting his situation get him down look that's fun

but you don't have to overstated you don't just say I am I am the luckiest man You can go, look, I've, we all think we take it in stride. I've had a lot of good things in my life, and this was not one of them. But, you know, what are you going to do? I've had a good life and hopefully have a bit more of a good life and won't get too bad. But thank you for believing me. That's a better speech than, I'm the luckiest man.

Because it only does two things. It does two things. It goes like, hey, what I just said, but also, like, you don't understand how good it is to be me. You don't understand how bad you have it. Even with ALS, I'm like the luckiest man alive. That's how bad your life is. I wouldn't trade my life with the President of the United States, alone you.

You're nothing to me. Wouldn't you consider a privilege to associate yourself with such a fine-looking man as a standing in uniform in this ballpark today? So just because he gets to hang out with Babe Ruth. Like I know my insides are rotting out or wherever it happens or my nervous system is trying to kill me. But, you know, Babe Brut got threw up on me once. That was really cool.

Why can't he be inspired by things? If I could, I wouldn't be here. I'd be doing something else. I'd be like climbing the mountains and jumping into volcanoes. I mean, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm not. We are who we are.

that I might have been given a bad break but I've got an awful lot to lift for that's all you needed if I'm if I'm making this bag in the day I'm like we'll cut the rest that crap out it's like it's like some guy who gets like you know who like who like falls down a well and then really like I don't say I do the same thing I'll sometimes like fall in middle of the street you know oh because I'm like I'll step into a crap on the street or something and then I'll tumble over and my first instinct was like I'm right even if I broke something I'm like I'm okay because you know I get you know I'm good I'm good like we just watch you tumble like down six flights of stairs but it's it's an instinct

to not so I get it a little bit but I mean just don't overstate things when you're that kind of person talking to a bunch of little people you know the people in the cheap seats they don't need to hear how you know tell them like look For a while, I was doing well, and then you looked up to me, and now my life's terrible. So, uh, you, time for, it's time for you guys to get yours. You know, we all, we all get a little, a little slice. I had mine. And now it's going to be a lot of pain, a lot of struggle, and a lot of bad feelings.

Even if you don't mean it, but it makes people feel, oh, good. It makes you, it makes you think about it and go, oh, I appreciate what I got. Not like, no, it's still, your life has no, there's like peaks in his valleys. You know, I mean, like, for me, like, you know, baseball, whatever I did, you know, home runs and the women. And these are all peaks. This is a valley. Your life is just valleys. Yeah.

You understand. I'm still like, I'll have more peaks. I'll go home and there'll be six women willing to, you know, investigate my ALS, if you know what I mean. Really give me a once over. I got a bad break, but I would rather slowly lose everything. single one of my motor functions, then turn it over in the morning and look at your pig wife. What's you going to do? Cook me a hot dog. Your pig wife, enjoy her.

Now, I'll take my life, thanks. Take my life, please. Yeah, we wish, he died, right? He did, yeah. Well, no, like, so they didn't... That would have sent a huge mixed signal. Yeah, well, have he lived, like, 40 years. But everyone else who had to...

What's what I'm saying? Why are we showing, like, this is before reality television. They used to, like, actually, you know, um, they didn't capture him, like, you know, decaying. Mm-hmm. Which would have been nice. I mean, for me. I would have, I would have...

That would have been nights for you? Well, I mean, he's better than keeping up with the Kardashians. It could be a rough thing People don't want to show broadcast that to the world Right, but you know, again, we've covered this recently. Fame is a very, famous people, they don't think like us. They want it. They want to keep it.

You can stay in the public eye, but you're going to be like, you know, messing yourself in the bathtub. Because, you know, you know, we're going to have to shoot footage of that. We'll blur it out. But, you know, you have to, you know, all over yourself. I ain't be crying. It's fine. I don't want people to forget who big, who big,

who big ow is. Why is it? What was his name? Lou Gehrig. Owl is the disease. What was it called now? Like ALS? Al, Big Al.

Oh, whatever. Give me nothing. Thanks for giving me nothing. I'm sorry. I try to make one joke that is a revolve around like body, bodily decay. And you give me nothing. I'm sorry.

But it's okay. This is all okay now because ALS has been cured by the Ice Bucket Challenge. Well, we bring up this back. What is this? These are videos. So let's play some of these. Let's see what these. Ice Bucket Challenge is the thing again.

I cannot believe we were back in 2014. But I know this because I've been nominated by about a billion of you guys in my comments and messages. Wait, a billion. Who is this guy? Is he famous? Oh, yeah, James Charles is huge. Oh, James Charles? He's a makeup guru.

I really am not built for this century. I don't know. I've heard of him, but I thought he was like ostracized. Like, so when you get canceled, you still have a really nice pool. Was he canceled for like makeup tutorials somehow? I don't know. He was canceled for some kind of feudy at with another. With makeup people.

Yeah. Yeah. I'm sorry. I'm stepping on makeup toes. Lucy and Ryan. What's wrong? Don't be derogatory for makeup. No, it's fine.

Yeah, love his pool. so let's see he's gonna the ice bucket challenge trended to raise awareness for ALS Lou Gehrick's disease which we still have not found a cure for

but this time around it is the USC speak your mind ice bucket challenge why are they changing the challenge due to mental health problems I am a huge advocate for mental health resources

being available they've gotten off ALS they completely ditched ALS so it did nothing ALA I didn't even raise awareness properly I don't know what it does and they've and they've gotten

and now they're doing mental health because some guy, you know, it's sad what happened, it seems kind of, but it's the USC thing is the thing, right? Because one guy, USC. Who cares? I mean, we'll get it in this.

It's really important to be able to speak your minds and hopefully be able to get help if you are struggling at home. I'm going to nominate Camila Arruho, Alex Warren, and Haley. Fuck, I don't want to do it. Do it. Oh, it's so cold.

One, two, three. It's fucking heavy. I can't raise it about my head. It just looks like water in there. It doesn't look like... It's not even ice. Do you need help? Dude, just do it.

What is this? Count down for me to have gotten. Three, two, two, one. So that's what you get. That's all you get, Lou. That's all you, you know, you had a good run. But when we reboot this thing, you're not involved. Well, I thought we're going to cure this thing.

You know, I mean, how many kids of A. I grew up with this challenge, and they're watching this now, go, I'm still in the chair. Shut up. Some kid at USC got, got ran into a bad patch of depression. I don't understand why the school matters. Who cares what school is? I am so sick of these colleges. Oh, I went to USC.

I went to Duke. I don't give a shit. I don't care at all. Someone tells me what college they went to? I'm going to spit in their face. I don't care. I'm not your recruiter Oh, I'm a duke shirt

Ah, this is where I've really learned To touch a tit for the first time What if it's a humble kind of like working class School? Like what? Like SUNY New Paul, it's Miami. How about like DeVry? You know, how about Apex Tech? You know? Yeah. The first tool

We put the tool in the toolbox. How about that? How about how about this ice bucket challenge for Apex Tech? You know you learn to use a tool to go over the toolbox. Then it's yours to keep. That's how this works. Like bocys.

Do you have bocys in your town when you grew up? Yes. Okay, maybe I guess it's a New York thing. I don't think it's a country. But it's the same idea. You know, vocational school. You know, HVAC. Some kid got caught in the HVAC.

Yeah, he died in the HVAC tubes. How about we do a nice fucking challenge for him? That's some guy who studied film and then like got really, you know, and got, well, I'm not trying to make fun. I mean, it's sad. But what you want me to do? it's not it's not als you can you can just cure that by like you know running you can't run when you have a ls you can't even run is it different than being in a wheelchair having a ls i don't

know how it works um oh yeah it's definitely different than being in a wheelchair it's uh i nominate everything shuts down here's a deal i nominate i'm i'll we'll do we'll meet up i'll meet you halfway whoever but I'm nominating Benjamin Netanyahu I'm nominating Zelensky I'm I'm admitting Putin

do the ice thing do it I'll get I'll come back and I'll get the ice I don't have a fridge that makes ice I'm sorry I said you know don't don't at me but get on this you have a whole piz of people why am I

I don't have the resources of a Netton Yahoo you realize how many people work for him he could just get get me some mice. I want to do the bucket and it's done. I had to like, you know, sit there with a mold and like make, make one batch of ice. Put it in a bowl. Put that back in a freezer and then freeze another batch. You know? Don't at me.

Anyway, but this is a public reception. Well, the campaign has been lauded for his innovative approach to raising mental health awareness has also faced critiques. Really? Some commentators argue that such viral trends may oversimplify complex issues. potentially reducing meaningful and get no i think i cure everything you do you are those people saying like you know like you can't just cure people won't stop you know deleting themselves just because you're poured ice and you i mean that's that's that's the other end of the spectrum as much as i'm giving it crap it's like you really think people are going to stop deleting

because you're poor ice i mean it's autism thing it's just kind of it's getting out of hand you know i don't know i don't know you know i may disagree with you know what causes it but it's it's it's starting to I can't stand this is not going it's not supposed to do anything that's not a charity

it's just to raise money right that's the whole idea they raise a bunch of money yeah you're supposed to honestly you're supposed to make people kind of like pay for it yeah

or James Charles you should be like if we can raise like you know 500K I'll do an ice bucket challenge how about you sell your pool and just do it for nothing

look at that pool how about you sell that just sell the pool sell the house go live in an apartment in Vista Del Rey And I'm like to give this money to people who you have to crawl around, like, worm, like bugs. If I get ALS, I'm not even going to get a chair.

I'm just going to crawl around New York City. I'll put it on knee pads or something and then gloves. I'll crawl around going, I have this disease hurts. I hurts. Why don't you rent this pool out for some key Sinearas? Yeah. And make some real money for ALS. Have a nice coming-of-age party for a bunch of young Hispanic women.

You know, do something. And have that money go straight to the ALS boys. I'm sick of these selfish Hollywood people. Anyone. It's a brighter, brighter, the Switch, too. The Switch, oh, there's a new Switch coming out. There's a new Switch. You love that Mario Car.

You love that Smash Brothers. I do like those games. Well, now, if you want, you can get it back. You can get back that, you know, you want to live in 2014, throw ice in yourself, you can do that. You want, you want to have lava consume your body the way to consume the residence of Pompeii. You can do that, and you can get back to the magic of the switch. When did that come out, like 2017, 2016, well, the new one. It's like 500 bucks or 450 or something.

And they had pre-sale last night, oh, it didn't go well. Really? Yeah, people... What's the problem? It was a total mess at first. Well, that's not promising. Nintendo acknowledged a high demand and advised customers to try third-party retailers as their own my Nintendo store. Why do I think this story is interesting?

At 449, the Switch 2 was a price hike from his predecessor, partly due to the hardware upgrade. I mean, here's the reality. It's, you know, this is... We're going into bleak times. We're going into a time of just, you know, the productions, you know, these tariffs, whatever you want to call it, the prices are sliding. The prices are increasing, production is sliding. No one, you know, with the birth rates long, I guess, nothing's going well, right? Can you grieve me on that?

Nothing's, nothing's going well, yeah. Right. The one thing you're supposed to add, like, we'll let you play Mario. That was the one thing we add, right? you know, oh, can I play, play, you know, the bayonetta? Oh, no, that is on Switch. What's the big thing? Can I play Eldon Ring on the PS5?

Well, no, you're poor. You can play Mario on the Switch. That was always the thing. It was the cheap one. You know, this is not the 90s. Nintendo was like, you know, they found their niche. But now the niche is getting, people are getting priced out of the cheap niche now. This is the thing.

It's getting bleaker. It's the same thing with the McDonald's on the iPads. Right? That's right, yeah. Yeah, well, maybe those people can go back to arcades. You want that's what you want. You want the poor and the underprivileged to gather together as used. Look, people are always complaining about being isolated.

You realize how dangerous arcades are? They're dangerous. Oh, you, I mean, you go to, we passed by that arcade in Coney Island. It didn't seem, it seems seedy. It seemed like people were no good. Coney Island's very, you know, it's not, it's not the night. I mean, yeah, they even, I think they even busters. it's all just I mean it's not in real games anymore it's just like it's gambling with like bright lights

it's like walking through a casino and like hey the game what's that game with that we should have a coin in the machine and you have to shoot other coins off a platform oh right yeah who likes that why you even have that there you know most of these games aren't even fun no you need a switch so you can play like you know ace attorney whatever the hell it is phoenix law ace attorney some crap anime game just saying like it's a we need

they need to they only just subsidize housing or like medicine or health care they just need to make the shows better right

don't make me don't make me watch a four part series on Netflix about some kid who like you stab some girl because of uh because he's in cell it's like

whatever what is it's 2015 right yeah you know like make me a nice show make me and let me play Mario cart without having to sell my kid it's not that much to ask right

you know that that reminds me that that show that everybody's talking about adolescence it's like you know it's actually in some ways it's not that different from what do you call it the uh that

self deletion show the uh 13 reasons 13 reasons why yeah all kind of like, you know. No, it's a good point. There is a certain. Fixating on these, on these personalities.

Yeah, there's a tragedy. It's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's this kind of weird tragedy, like, just gluck, like, people just love watching kids tragedies. I don't think it goes back to Romeo and Julia. Yeah, people love that. Romeo Julia, just kids are like 15. First of all, why we even read, I don't want to read stories about kids kissing each other. I don't need that.

You think it's just trying to cope with like, you know, do you think it's just people trying to cope with not being young anymore? It's like, oh, well, you know, you know, I'm over the hill, but at least I'm not dealing with, you know, red pill murders and, and. Yeah, what I think is more, I think, I think secretly they're jealous of the young. And, well, that's part of the problem. I'll guess the other problem is, you know what the other problem is. You know, is they're jealous of these young people.

So the idea of a young person, you know, it's kind of like Lou Gehrig. It's the idea of Luke, if you look, if you were like, people have been happy. Because they're like, oh, you didn't have so good, huh? There's nothing people like better. People think they're poor And they're like this great soul Well they have soul They've got sold

They're good people Yeah I mean sometimes But a lot of times They'd be happy to watch them do that At least not me And they ain't so good huh Yeah these are the people Who used to watch like hangings for fun

Yeah So I'm saying is like you know They watch these like you know Shows about these kids Can they go get good Oh Ain't so great being Not your back not hurting

Huh Oh your back doesn't hurt Oh you You get the whole life ahead of you? Oh, maybe you're in jail forever now. And she's got no life. Just saying, people, people are bitter and they're bad people. And also, the obvious other reason why people want to watch kids kissing, which I don't like.

Keep putting it on, huh? The kissing booth. Oh, it's for, let me see who watches that crap. You know? How much of it is actually kids watching it? Why are you staying silent on this? But I think that that also would have been, it would have been honestly like a more of, like,

it would have been a more like realistic, revealing plot line. Yeah. If instead of like, if instead of like getting all red pilled and then becoming a killer. Right. The kid had like gotten all red pill and then, you know, uh,

you know, transition to get the female privilege and then. Yeah. Well, okay. He pulled a Leah Thompson or whatever. Right. And then, like, you're talking about for sports, you mean, right? Oh, you mentioned female privilege in general.

Yeah. Oh, okay. Yeah, whatever they're looking for. Whatever treatment they're looking for. Right. Oh, yeah. I'm the fiction. Is it just like a personality where, like, I've always suspected that probably some guys, like, you know,

don't like that they're not being wooed in the dynamic. Right. Like, it's nice to be wooed sometimes as a lady. Sure. Why me and dye me, you know? Right. Take me to the Polish sausage house. I'd love some Polish sausage.

Why doesn't any girl just walk up to me and go, hey, you know, I like the way. I like to cut you your jib. Let me put some sausage in your mouth. You know? I bet you like to eat some sausage in sourcrow with some hard bread, some hard, nice crispy bread. I go, oh, I mean, look, don't expect, don't expect nothing from me necessarily. Yeah, I'm a good guy. I'm a good boy.

Don't expect me to do anything. But, you know, I just thought she wanted to take me of the sausage. I didn't think there's any quid pro quo. Yeah, these things are not something I have to worry about. Women have to worry about that, I guess, sometimes. Like when the guy wants to take them out, you know, are they just friends? Right. Or will it turn into a human trafficking situation?

Well, you know, they love to pretend everything's taken. They use that against men. Let's not get a circle. Every girl start taking and go, oh, no, me. human traffic by this beta boy no the beta boy is not on human traffic you relax most of the time you can't quote me

on that yeah some I mean it's gonna happen sometimes but not because you know but statistically you're fine so you know leave me out of it just saying I'm just sick of hysteria of all this stuff you know should we end this with a we have a new segment

we're trying out we have we you know we're doing we're gonna start doing some advice here maybe you know because people People need help. I'm sick of reading my challenges because some kid at UFC at the UFC That's what happened? Yeah.

At the UFC? The UFC, yeah. The UFC. I was doing, yeah. I was doing the thing with UFC. It was a joke. Sorry about that. Dear Kump is from Tina in Baltimore.

I gave my dad a $100 Amazon gift card for his birthday. He told me gift cards are a late. and gave it back physically handed it back with a post oh post it that said try why do you people just email we didn't even doing this like we get these emails I mean like who are these people who are these people why they think we were like I mean do we offer this at some point I never did I mean a while back I usually don't check this email with a post that said try again I haven't spoke to him in two weeks am I the problem

or is this emotional terrorism. Yeah, look, gift guards a little bit. Here's a deal. Here's what you can do. You can just leave him to rot. You ever seen an old person when they get the point where, like, you know, they can't really,

where they have ALS effectively? Or they're like, you know what I mean? Where they're, like, they're crawling around. Yeah, they're dependent. Yeah. Just don't give him water. I'm not, if you're as care, you can't do that.

But don't play the game. Don't play the games. I'm not saying if you're as caretaker, you have to give them water. I'm saying, but don't get into the whole thing. Like, yeah, if you're going to, like, give me a cracker, like, give you a gift card, well, I'm not going to, like, go home when you're, like, you know, messing yourself. You take a dumpsel over your body, you know? And I'm like, oh, I'm going to take care of you now?

No, you get, like, just be more. These people don't care about you. They left us nothing, these boomers, right? Whatever these people are. Oh, my dad's not boomer. It's actually generation next. I don't care. anyone older than me can go to hell

all right so I'm just saying you don't owe anyone anything I don't envy the moral complexity of having a Gen X parent you know Oh yeah But having a boomer parent is so much simpler

Yeah Because were the boomers The draft dodgers Who draft dodged? I think the boomers draft dodged a little bit That's actually something I don't mind about them No but I use it against them I mean I look

I'm not going to not use that against them And they you know it's like you is whatever uh good for them if you know you you should have gone and fought that noble war you're a coward um but yeah but yeah but like just just cut them off come out your life cut your parents out your life that's my advice don't even don't even if they say they're sorry even it comes back and hey i was drunk and i lost my job that day i mean to you know lash out you with the gift card, you only didn't even say that

because you block them and you'll never talk to them again. That's my only advice to people. It's just as soon as someone wrongs you, immediately cut them out of your life. Yeah, that's a good plan. Do you look around the world? Does it seem like anyone's looking at for you?

No one is. I mean, look, I guess if you came from like a nice family with people who care about you, maybe they are, that must be nice. I'm not calling for sympathy. I just can't relate. Okay? so if you want my uh verdict it's just you know and maybe maybe uh you know send him

like a bunch just a bunch of meat in the mail because but not like one not not like not not not frozen loose meats just loose meat like just put a bunch of ground beef in the box tape it up just send it to him oh I would have you know and then like send send a parcel post or book rate whatever you know let it take a week to get to him what happens He must smell bad, it must smell bad, right? A little milk. He won't be able to explain it. You know, he'll be telling his friends, like,

my son sent me a meat box for the first mess. And then his friend will be like, that sounds great. No. Oh, you don't understand. The meat was, the, it was human meat. Well, you know, it was a thought that counts. It was his own face inside of it. It was very disturbing.

You think that would be revenge for them, right? But, no, it's not. If they, like, the same way the people would, turn on Lou Gehrig, if your parents, if your parents throw your face in a box, they go, Lisa ain't me. That's how they look at us. Lisa ain't me. So why are we?

Now I don't even want to give them credit for being draft Dodgers. I feel like that was their good parents and the greatest generation going like, I'm going to ship you off to the jungle. Right. Get over to Canada. A boomer would never help you dodge draft. No. No, no, they were helped by the greatest.

They were just do nothings. Yeah. They were just, they were just people who were like, you know, they went from watching Howdy-Duty to, like, to, like, to drinking maple syrup while their friends died in the jungle. You realize the callousness you have to have in your heart, the darkness in your heart, for that to be true, terrible. It's just really no, there's no good answers anymore. No. Did you do another one of these? I mean, it's probably multiple people.

Amanda in Brooklyn I made a dumb joke in our group chat the next day my friend tweeted almost word for word and then blew up I mean first of all it's exed she didn't tag me or acknowledged me should I bring it up or let it go sleep with her husband

I'm sick of these people who like have these like you know oh here's what you should do talk to them and tell them how I mean I don't know how these people. I mean, if she had kids who were above 18 or 18 or older, you know, do that too. Only you're 18 or older, though. I'm saying? Right.

Like if you're, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you're, if you're, if you're, you're, uh, you know, go, go, go, go, go, go so you're, her dad. Go. Go. Go. Go break up your mom and dad. Her mom. You know, you know, I'm saying. Like, like, you know, or just start dating. Just start dating, uh, like, like, like, her grandpa. I mean, how crazy would it be? Think about your, if you found out one of your, like, kind of friends, you're, like, a good friends. I'm not sure, but, like, you know, a lot of women are very bad friends to each other. I've noticed that.

You disagree? I think there's definitely some bad female friends out there. Yeah. I don't like how you couch that so much, but, you know, I can really see that being, imagine if one of them, like, you know, you found out, like, they were, they seduced your grandpa. Oh, God. And then you have a picture of your grandpa and his old sack, his old sack getting, getting belated. And your grandmother's crying.

Yeah. Yeah, that would be a huge betrayal. That would definitely, that would definitely be justice for the tweet, the stolen tweet, I guess. I don't know. I mean, do you know how to hack? Can you steal her identity? Am I fit to give advice? I mean, I think my advice is fine.

I mean, yeah, like steal her identity. get her credit when you're over a house buy buy her a lasagna or make her a lasagna or buy a lasagna I don't know one of those two if you live near an Italian specialty shop you can buy it but make sure it's nice here's what you do here's what you do you get a nice lasagna right women love lasagna and say hey hey hey we're just two we're just two little hens right yeah women are always doing lasagna nights let's love a lasagna night

I'll bring some bottles of wine we can watch uh what's the thing women like Pride and prejudice, yeah I knew And when she's And then you just You know And he's keep feeding all resagna Until she gets fat

And then when she gets fat You start bullying her Yeah You know Excluding her from things Maybe you know You just figure out how to make A really good lasagna

And then just ruin her life with it Just go hey And like every It's just all the time Maybe act like you got into cooking And just And just make extravagant cookies

make your friend fat ruin a damn life what you want for me you want me to fix the world i can't fix the world i'm just saying there's a whole uh thing out there there's a whole way to be if there's any advice i could give to the world

it's just don't don't get sick don't get sick don't lose your job and don't you know don't expect your kids do anything you know anything for you yeah um don't trust your parents don't have any expectations of your kids don't be a good friend yeah um really just look at it for yourself but be a good person that's the other side of it but don't don't screw people like this girl got scat what was he invited what was she did she stole a joke from her is that why i told her to make her fat well yeah

still but in general yeah don't let people walk all over you but you know but uh be nice you know like but kiss a homeless guy I'm not saying no lepers right we don't have them in America right right but kiss a homeless guy is that bad advice are they dangerous I mean if you kiss everybody keeps telling me everyone keeps telling me they're not dangerous a passionate kiss yeah could take a especially a freshly homeless person turn his whole life around well how about we do that

how about that's our challenge kiss the homeless challenge that's a new challenge here's a challenge I'm giving out to America all right not the ice bucket challenge had its day and did nothing

get on video go to Skid Row go go in New York City wherever they reside under under Meeker Avenue or wherever the hell and go kiss a homeless guy challenge

but with permission they still have well you can't assault them they still have bodily autonomy yeah you look at me it takes a while assume a homeless person wants to kiss you

you've seen these videos they take 10 minutes to set them up it's not going to be like you just jumping on a homeless guy. But I'm here because these people are all narcissists, right? Who do these challenges? I'm here in the middle of Hunter Meeker Avenue under the BQE.

And I'm with Chaz, who's been living rough for 10 years. And I'm doing the homeless challenge for leprosy. And I nominate you, George Clooney and Pete Hecksteth. And who else? One more person. I'm named George Cooney, Pete Hedekset, and who's the guy who runs turkey? Oh, I'm Erdogan. Yeah, Erdogan.

Come on, do this. Go because of homeless. What, you don't have homeless in the turkey? Figure it out. We're trying to cure leprosy here. And then leprosies such as a good thing where, like, people will just believe if you say you cured it. We had to, like, do research to find out if there's any left. So you can just, well, that'll be the thing.

I'll start this challenge. And then it's just going to be no more. Like, you know, we'll just, I'll just say it's done. Leopardy's over. Like, it's six months from now. I'll claim to win. Just like, you know, just like George Bush, George W. Bush, mission accomplished. I'll claim to win.

We cured leprosy by kissing a bunch of homeless guys. Yeah, I mean, maybe you can't be women. And that seems sexist, but you know it's just going to be a litigation problem. I don't need men trying to find a curious homeless girl. And then going, ah, you know, this is. I'm just being practical here. Right. It's my hashtag.

And it all comps, what do you call it? Like a beta because he said that? Just don't tell people that. Don't tell people how beta I was by saying you couldn't. I just don't want the legal problems here. Don't confuse legal problems of not being misogynistic. Just be discreet. I just don't want to get sued.

Can you sue you for a hashtag? Well, I don't want to find out. Anyway, thanks so much for tuning in the comp. Thank you. And remember, you know, subscribe, notification bell, and we're to Patreon. Patreon.com, slash Raycom, again, extra episode every week for five bucks a month. Enjoy. Have a great week. We'll see you all soon.

Have a great week. Thank you.