Kump - Ep. 237 At War With Demons

Episode Date: November 14, 2025

Ray and Lucie dive into the world of demons. From Tucker Carlson’s “blood in the sheets” story to the terrifying “Demon Database,” this episode spirals into Catholic guilt, goat demons, boiling holy water, and the question: which demon really attacked Tucker?🎧 Subscribe on Patreon for bonus episodes every week:⁠⁠⁠patreon.com/raykump

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19 plus Ontario only. Please play responsibly. Concerned by your gambling or that if someone close, you call 1866-3-3-1-2-60 or visit comixonterio.ca. Welcome to Kump special episode today. It's a shorter episode. I had to travel somewhat last minute, but we didn't want to leave anyone hanging. Here's a thing, though. It's only a half hour today. So it's a nice time for a little experiment.

Let's see how long everyone can watch in one sitting. Maybe we can get this algorithm going. People keep telling me they want me to be a big star, and they want me to talk about the demons and the Pocci Mamas and spread the word. and I'm all, we're doing demons today. We're talking about demons. We're not talking about accounting and, you know, watching paint dry. We're going to learn all about demons. It's going to be good.

So stick around to the end if you can. Don't, you know, well, your baby's not going to get that hungry in a half an hour. You know, what do you think is going to happen? It's fine. It's crying for one of three reasons. I'm like, you know, I check on the baby. Whatever. How about your parents?

Let's get to it. What is going on in this world? I'm seeing a lot of talk of demons. I grew up Catholic. Like you did, Lucy, right? That's right, yeah. What I grew up, I kind of thought these angels and these demons and these spooky things were more metaphorical.

Like, we believed it, but, like, you know, like St. Michael the Archangel had a spear, and he's spearing the devil. But, like, he's not there. People talk about this war in heaven, as it were. But, you know, like, I don't have a sword. Yeah, to be honest, it always seemed to me like it would be... It wouldn't exactly make sense if it were literally true, you know?

Right. But if it's a story, it's the best story ever told. There's an incredible story. But that being said, it doesn't make a whole lot of sense either way. So you might as well, like, you know, fight, look, there's things in the world that are evil, right? And why is God let them happen? Because we're not fighting them with swords.

Like that's maybe why is God let evil happen in the world? And we all just say that, right? Why do you let my baby die? Because you didn't stab the ghoul. You're supposed to get a Christian sword, anointed with oils, you know, go to a local abbey or a monastery, get a local, friar or a bishop to bless your weapons and stab some kind of strange lyger some kind of weird bear man you're supposed to force the evil doer to

reveal their true form you're supposed to yeah you can't just sit there and go oh I love praying I love Jesus yeah I love you too buddy pick up a weapon that's what Jesus is saying so that's what I'm coming to realize I've been criminally negligent in my in my services as a good Catholic man I need to learn about my enemies which are literal demons that's right it's been too long so we're gonna get into we've found a couple of we haven't really perused them but there's a couple websites that Lucy's found what what the first one I mean what's that clip you know what he's a good clip you want to show that clip first yeah

this is what I'm talking about play play this said, you think you were attacked by a demon. I have to tell you, like a lot of people mock this, they rolled her eyes. I look at like what happened to Charlie, what happened in the wake of Charlie, what happened at the Ascension School in Minneapolis, where

that man went in there and shot a bunch of little children praying at their church school. And I challenge anyone to tell me there aren't demons among us. I never thought there were. I thought it was, I thought the whole thing was like bizarre.

Because what happened? Because, like, culturally, I'm just not from a world where people are attacked by demons. So we're on the same page here. You know, Beck and Kelly, I mean, she's saying, what did she say? I challenge anyone to prove this ordeal. I can't. I literally can't prove that. And in fact, when it happened the next morning, when I saw the blood on my sheets, I was like...

Blood in the sheets. I actually called... Wait, wait, there's blood in the sheets in the story? Look, I'm... I thought, honestly, I wasn't ready for this. I thought that he would, I thought the story was like he was lying in bed and he heard a ghoulish sound and maybe tussled with something. I'm telling you, this, I am not kidding around here. We need to arm ourselves soon.

As soon as I get back from travel, I'm going to come back with anointed swords. I'm going to come back with weapons of holy war. Like, was it the demon's blood? Was it his blood? I mean, do you want to watch this? I mean, we'll just get to the demons. What do you think? No, that's the serum out.

That's a very sincere, lifelong evangelical. And I'm like, have you heard of this? And she's like, oh, yeah, it happens all the time. I was like, what? Not to Episcopalians, it doesn't. Stuff it down. Yeah, no, it was, it was, well, yeah, I mean, I'm not embarrassed at all. And I don't care if I'm mocked.

Don't get anything out of making this up, and I'm not making it up. But what happened? What could you get out of this? What could you get out of bleeding into your sheets? That's not, I mean, he's a type of Carlson. Bleeding from where? I mean, where else could it be? Where do demons attack you?

I'm saying if it wasn't a demon, did you know what he's saying or what he's implying? If he's not a demon, why would you say that in public? You know, it's the worst thing a man would want to say. Right. And it's not to do with homophobia or whatever. It's just, well, no one wants to be, you know, oh, yeah, it's bleeding out of there. Bleeding out of my rectum. No, it's not.

It's just never, I mean, even if it's just because you ate something nasty. It's still, it's still, it's still, no one wants to admit that. No one wants to admit that. I'm just saying, what if there was like a horrible, um, what if there's a horrible man actually terrorizing Greenwich, Greenwich Village or where Greenwich County residents or wherever he's from? Yeah. What's in, and, uh, he's on Maine.

He lives in Maine. I believe in Vermont, one of those places, I think. he lives up up in the in a brabbling brook he's not in the middle of some city he lives with the animals and the trees I think I made Greenwich, Connecticut I know he looks like he'd be from Grinch, Connecticut

and I had all of a sudden this we were talking about someone I despise and all of a sudden I had this crazy empathy for the person like really intense empathy like it could understand why this person was doing these horrible things and I said to the person in the truck there's a family dispute, right?

So I was, said to the person, maybe my brother, and I said, I think I know what's happening here. This person feels this way, that way, this way. And my brother goes, how did you know that? I said, I don't know it, just like, and my brother goes, I think, like, God is, like, speaking through you or something.

And I felt total, true empathy for this person I truly hate. I respect Tucker. I cannot watch any more of this. I'm a man of action. I'm not going to talk to my brother. my brother's got nothing to do with this I need a sword a holy sword

if a demon comes he's getting stabbed I'm not saying I'll live I'll survive or defeat the demon I want to know what the I don't care what I'm sorry this happened to you Tucker I'm sorry you let this happen all right

he never explained where he was bleeding he got stabbed by a demon stop it stop doubting Thomas Downing Lucy? What are you doing? Let's get to this demon database. Demon database, please.

Okay. I want to know. I don't care how many gallons leaked into his bed. I don't care of his mattress was just saturated with blood. I don't care if it was his blood or not. I don't care.

I'm just like, what if there's a gay grapest? A gay grape? Yeah. drugging them, having his way with them, escaping into the night. And then people are blaming it on demons, like those ghost grapes in the Mennonite community in Brazil. I just want justice for him if he was seriously.

If you want justice, then we need to be able to label different kinds of demons. So we, by their horns, by their horns, by their hoofs, by their fur, okay? by the stripes you know the tigers have stripes what you know what are these demons have

because if we don't know that that we won't know which ones are doing what you're claiming a man did that's being done but it's being done maybe that's the implication you're being a core you oh whatever it's just this but like maybe he wasn't stabbed

not that way at least yeah he was stabbed in a Shakespeare way right then Shakespeare, like to dance around that with that little number and go, oh, stab me with Don Arrow or whatever the hell, they said back then.

But either way, it was a demon did it. What is he at the game by saying it was a demon? It's not a man. You're absolutely right. That's just get into looking at some of these demons.

Yes, yes, yes. This is a website called Delirium's Realm. Delirium's Realm. Okay. Essays on good and evil. Do they have pictures? It looks like they have pictures. Here's a picture of a...

Is that Michael? That's Michael. That's Satan. I thought we had a database of demons. We do, we do. We have a huge database, and I think you want to start with Judeo-Christian demons?

Well, what else are we going to do? Hindu demons? I mean, I don't live in India. True. You know, there's a reason... It's fair. There's a reason... Maybe there's a reason there's all these different.

Oh, Hindu God, the Chinese God, and an American god you know why we have all these gods because they have turf you know we we act like the world that God has to be the all encompassing thing and our God is sure

I can't say it's not because otherwise I'd be blasphemous because this is no time for blasphemy this is no time to half ass it right you got you got to just go all in with the army you brought you but that being said maybe there's turfs

yeah that's a good point so what we got here where do you want to start we have we have a few options here we have uh adramelic adramillic uh we have abraxas what is a braxus this thing looks crazy that's that santana album right oh is that the name of a santana album

yeah santana abraxas did you ever see that cumberbler's movie i didn't order santana abraxas i didn't listen to it san anna braxus I've just been in a terrible auto accident. The name of Braxis was taken from Abra-Cadabra. He is presented on amulets with the head of a cock,

dragon's feet, and a whip in his hand. It doesn't look like a head. All right, does the head of a cock? Okay. I'll take your words for that. Like a chicken? I mean, we both know what that looks like. That is, I don't know if that looks like the head of a chicken.

It's a strange chicken. Don't say it. It's a strange chicken. That's all, like, leave the picture up. This is the picture of the Abraxas. Now, what is this? Carl Young described as three stages of, look, I'm not, are these things real?

Are we talking about Carl Young? Because Carl Young was a psychologist. He came after Freud. All right, he did like 20th century shit. I need real demons. Are these biblical demons? Well, look, that's, look, that's, Abraxus speaketh that hollowed in a cursed word,

which is life and death at the same. time. Abraxas begetteth truth and lying. Good and evil. Light and darkness in the same word and in the same act. How do I kill it? Therefore, is Abraxas terrible? How do I kill it?

Do I boil bleach on the stove and throw it in its eyes? I got to say, this thing doesn't look that dangerous. No, I'll squash this thing. I'll wrap it up in holy chains. I'll just boil a pot of holy water he's what I'm going to do. Every night, I'm going to put a bottle

a pile of holy water that I'm gonna buy holy water in bulk I'm a strong arm of a priest to bless it for us and I'm gonna put it on the stove and I'm gonna keep it boiling all night a chain in there and anything happens I run for that chain and I wrap it around his thing's neck

it'll cut right through all right I'm just like after this this long kind of poetic thing it's vague it's not even I'm not even sure what what he's accusing at Brax up in it. But it's just funny that at the end of it is just like, that's

why this guy sucks. Right. That's why we hate the Abraxas. I mean, why is he have a crown on? Oh, here. According to Colin De Plancy, 1863, Abraxas is one of the gods of the Asian Diagrani and whose name is read in abrogadabra.

What is Abra? Is that the is that who said that? Was that isn't that what Julius Caesar said, that's Vinny, Vinny Vici. Oh, oh, they hear something. Now among the last of the angels, those who made this world, he places the God of the Jews' latest that is.

Wait, wait, wait, hold on. Yeah, look, Christ moreover. This is the Christ, keep it the Christ stuff. The Jewish stuff, no offense, but they said they, they have it was a lot of those longer ago, they didn't fight as many wars. Like, Christians, though, how to, like, militarize in a bit of a way. I mean, no, don't be wrong, you know, so is this, you know, certain, but, you know, the crusades and stuff.

Like, we, we, we, we militarized this kind of stuff, demons, you know, the nice Templar, the Sepal Codariot, you know, so what is that, what they say about Christ? Look, this is all very heady I was looking for more of a All right, let's go, let's go Let's go, come on, let's keep this move Let's find a better demon Let's see

Ooh, what is, what's Biazabab I thought Biazab was the devil I think that's one of his forms, right? Well, let's click on it and see Get no frills delivered Shop the same in-store prices online and enjoy unlimited delivery with PC Express Pass.

Get your first year for $2.50 a month. Learn more at p.c.express.ca. So Biaelzebub. It's kind of wanted to know to be just a bug. It sounds like bug. Bealzebub also called Buh, what's that he?

Bau. I was doing a ball derivative. Bile is a big one. I guess, I guess there's, I didn't realize it's, but Baal has his own little crew. So he's one of Baal's sub-demans. It's going to sit there. Also called Bealzebub, or Bezalbub, known as the Prince of Demons, is the Sympatic Gospels, Mark and Luke, who is the Pharisees accused Jesus of being because he could

cast out demons. Oh, so the Pharisees claimed that Jesus was Bealzab. Never knew that. the scribes who had come from Jerusalem said he is possessed by the elizabal and by the people so this is uh i don't know this is this is not exciting you did you what you want to do did you find something else uh let's look at this look at as real this is kind of interesting but as azrael asrael what Azizel

well as Azizel okay there's a Batman character called Asriel which I think is based on the Bible But okay You said it so confidently I was like do you know this bitch I didn't as real I know I mean he's and he was He actually became back when Bain

Snap Batman's back When he first appeared you know after the nightfall Asriel who he had trained Who was John Paul something some French dude Who was part of the program they call it the same famous assassins he he was a hero as real but he took on in the mantle of batman for a while but they started killing people and there's no good uh azizel so read some of this guy it's hard for me to read was these these demon glasses so this is her

she seems to have wings yeah uh azizel is the chief of the goat demons who haunted the desert and to whom most primitive semitic tribes offered sacrifices interesting the old testament states that Jerobam appointed priests But Josiah Destroyed the places of their worship And the practices accompanying the worship involved Copulation of women with goats So women

Get with goats To worship this girl So that's the thing about the past That's what I'm trying to get a handle on What are they offering us? What are these women getting out of it? He's like bang these goats and they're like No problem boss. We got this

But why? You know, David Koresh, you know, the Waco guy. I kind of, I mean, I get that, you know, at least in the movie that they made for NBC or whatever it was, it was played by the guy from Wings. He was a charismatic guy. He was a charming guy, right? You know, he had sex with people. He said, you know, children.

I mean, that's not only in that part. I'm just saying, like, he was a, but the adult women, he also was, you know, he seduced or whatever. But this is just some demons saying bang a goat. Like, why? What's the point I'm saying? Where's the, where's the, there's no meat in the gristle? It's all sick, no carrot. Right, right.

Like, where's the carrots? Give me a carrot cake. The sarim, or hairy demons as the word itself means, are mentioned in Leviticus and Chronicles as goat demons. The name Azel may be derived from, above, uh. So he's a goat, so he is a goat demon. So are they banging him? I got to say so far these, these demons.

seem weird, but basically neutral. These don't seem like the kind of demons that are interested in haunting you. They're just kind of dancing on their own. Well, they need to dig deeper because something left a pool of blood in Tucker Carlson's

bed. The Book of Enoch. Read this to me, please. In one account of the fall of the angels in the book of Enoch, Azizel is the leader of the watchers who educates mankind of heavenly secrets that lead humankind to sin.

Here we go. These teachings include making weapons. Okay. Wait, he's the demon. Making weapons of war and repairing cosmetics, which enable the women to seduce the angels. Oh, is this like sounding gomorah stuff? Okay.

Maybe. Now, this is getting good. Yeah. Azizel. It was because of Azizel's teachings that God sent the flood to destroy the evil in the world. Right. Wow. Damn.

I didn't real. We got to read this Bible more. We got to get to the bottom of this Bible Because there's a lot of stuff going on I didn't I didn't realize that there was such I thought That there was a Bible because I had a kid's Bible growing up I mean that's part of the problem Don't give your kids a kid's Bible

Teach them the real Bible because I have all these Our actual gaps I don't even know are gaps People go oh you know I did the flood If you were doing sins and stuff I didn't realize there was such an in-depth reason That they knew they'd culprits for why the flood happened Well, Azizel's teaching people to make war And weapons and seducing the angels

I had no idea all this stuff was happening Jesus When you use something as a weapon That's not supposed to be a weapon Like a meat tenderizer Yeah Do you think that's Azizel at work? I mean, no

I think, I mean, well Or is it just when you When you prepare your gun I think, look, it is possible that Azizel was working through me When I say get a hammer getting me tender riser. Am I being possessed by Azazel?

You might need an exorcism. I... A little, you know, nothing crazy. You're going to exercise me, and the next day, some regular guy's going to kill me on the subway. You know, I need to protect myself. I'm going to be left vulnerable. The problem is Catholics wait until it's too late.

They wait until, like, you know, your head's spinning around on your body. You know, you need that Baptist exorcism where they just put, you know, a hand on your head. when you're acting weird. Right. You think that I need to get like as if it was an open MRI or a full body scan. Yeah.

I just get a routine exorcism. Yeah. It's not a bad idea. I mean, why not just show, like, why not just get some priest and just start like being get out demon? You know, that thing they do? Like, get out, put your mom, whatever, you know? And then like, yeah, and then if the demon is, you know, I'm just sitting going, what do you want? Why are you doing this?

Why are you doing it? Get out. Get out. You smell bad. Get away from me. But there was a demon inside me. I'd be like, oh, I'm going to get shit. I got this deal.

I'm controlling this fat boy. Fat boy works for me now. You know? They get boastsful. These demons get boastful. They got nothing else going on. They don't have a body. You know?

They don't got a body. They don't got like a, they're just kind of at the mercy of the physical realm. So they got, when they get, when they get a body, they don't got, when they get when they get a chance they're like oh i got him now this boy's eating i mean i've i haven't even no fiber you know he's just got all the wrong things inside of them what's it was because asrael only popular as they'll taught people the art of making swords and knives and shields and breastplates and they show to their chosen ones bracelets decorations i don't think Azizel is a big culprit. I don't think

the guy who told us to defend ourselves even if he's a demon and apparently God did the flood because of him. I don't know. I don't think he's the one who wounded Tucker. Who's Biamam? Look at this thing. This is an elephant-looking thing. This is the kind of thing that might have done something to Tucker. You mean

behemoth? Yeah. Behemoth? The spirit of the desert, possibly. A lot of these a lot of these bitches be living in the desert. I mean, you know, it's like... Don't go out into the desert. Yeah, that's the thing. You know, when things got cold. That's when you got like werewolves and vampires

these ghouls, these goblins, you know, but the back thens, desert demons are just nasty. They're like, it's just rotten flesh. Behem of the spirit of the desert possibly derives from the Egyptian from water buffalo.

The Old Testament earliest description is in the book of Job, which describes behemoth as follows. behold the he myth which I made as I made you he eats grass like an ox Behold this the strength is in his loins

Oh this thing's the worst See what It's in his loins He uses his loin to attack you This is it I think I think this is the guy I think this is the guy who attacked Tucker With someone I'm gonna I know people who know him

I don't know I never talk to the guy I'm gonna pass along a message and see if it gets to him So I think I know the demon him I've heard him and I'm willing to help we're all brothers in Christ you know I don't know how you feel Lucy but I feel like we know

I don't care what your politics are brother in Christ against what's his name Behemoth Against Behemath Oh this is where the word behemoth comes from Oh Jesus Christ This is no good

And his power in the muscles of his belly This is a big culprit We're gonna have to scout you know Peru some more but behemate is really this is the as a cop say I'm liking them for this

I'm liking them for I'm liking behemoth for this Tucker thing you know it feels like the wire like we just figured out who Avon Barksdale is you know

and the down in the darkness you don't my back behemas in paradise lost yeah no Milton

that's one of Milton than the devil, right? Paradise lost. Better to serve in hell, better to rule in hell and serving heaven. Nasty shit. Nasty. What's up with Bilal? What's Bilal?

Belial is Hebrew for without value. God, that's just, it's just like a bad asset. It's a toxic asset. Belial is just like, it's a CDO. Belial is shit coin. So it's a credit default swap

Yeah, shit coin It's a fucking what they call those things That like those NFTs Yeah, no Let's get through a real These are these all just Paradise Lost No, he's the referencing a minute All right

Let's get to like Are you like specifically Christian ones? Yeah, let's see A lot of these do seem to be Old Testament demons Jewish demons Because you know here's something I've mentioned this recently

Maybe on Tim's 5 but um there's a thing when you are faced with a demon we'll get what hold on when you face a demon this is an important lesson what you do is you stare into its eyes and you say i invoke the name of jesus christ all right it's a powerful thing to do i don't know the jewish religion has that quite you know no yeah the the jewish religion doesn't seem to have an equivalent of just shoving a cross and the things face. Right. So I mean,

but you need to be prepared to do that and you might need also a sword that's anointed by Jesus. But my point is, so maybe that's why these demons

plagued more of the Old Testament, but there's still a problem. I'm not saying they don't exist anymore. Right. I'm just saying, but you know,

you need to use the weapons of Christ. So, what were you? Is that a wheelchair? Lamia. Lamia were harmful spirits.

who killed infants and seduced sleeping men. Oh, God. And they're ladies. Oh, man. Tango got done in by a lady demon? It's no good. One myth tells the original, Lemia was a beautiful queen of Libya

who won Zeus's heart. Hera became jealous of this union and retaliated by killing all her children who are fathered. Greek myths? These things are real? The Greek myths are real? I had no idea. I thought there were just stories.

all right we got to we got to kind of get to let's find a couple a couple of what's incubus that's a band right incubis is a nasty demon i kind of know about the incubus um incubus was an angel who fell because of lust for women interesting the being appears to women often in the form of a sexual nightmare oh god this could be it too right yeah and what happens i mean does it you know to leave blood It was just nightmare, poison. This is a bad, this is where this is, we're getting to the, I mean, I didn't realize we were going to get, like, get, like, such a definitive answer here.

I was hoping. I mean, this is what they mean when they see have fate. I'm usually such a naysayer. But we've gotten, like, two or three real, I'm liking two or three of these is real suspects here. Oh, yeah. For Tucker. I'm imagining, like, we're, we're seeing the lineup.

like it's the usual suspect It's all four of them It's all five of them It's like which one We're sitting on either side of Tucker He's in a blanket Drinking hot tea Trying to drink hot tea

Rocking back and forth Yeah yeah I put my hand in their shoulder He's all right Cool cool He's hot to the touch Yeah Cold to the touch

Yeah I see hot Yeah So what's his incubus Is it go inside you The incubus can assume Either a male or female shape

God, it's a fucking kidding. Very timely, too. Right? Yes. It's a very timely demon. Sometimes he appears as a full-grown man. I don't know. And if it is a woman who has been received as a witch, he generally assumes the form of a rank goat. I hate this.

Like a smelly goat? I guess so. Like just streaking. I would hate to be involved with an incubus. I need boiling holy woman. water and acid. Can a priest bless acid? I want to pour

like just like sulfuric acid or hydrochloric acid blessed by the Pope. Now you infamously weren't allowed to go to a chess tournament once

because of demons. Yeah, well my mom I was mad for a long time. She opened, I was a little chest tournament, we would have won unless I lost every match or was just like not going to happen. But maybe.

But the point is, I would have been a champion at something. And I was mad because when we got up, she opened the Bible, and she just best featured nightmare, I mean, me dying or something. And she opened the Bible when she woke up, and ran the page, I was just people being beaten and tortured by demons with sticks. And I was what we're talking about. But all these years later, maybe she had a point. I could have been consumed by some kind of,

incubus in the car on the way this chess tournament. I wonder if there are demons that specifically target children, precocious children. I mean, well, Lilith? Lilith, maybe.

Lilith was Adam's first wife. Right. We'll have to get to the bottom of this. We might do more of this on the Patreon or future episode. But we're going to wrap this up because we have a suspect already. And yeah, we're doing a shorter one today.

but you know it's uh this is this this is good though we're gonna be diving more into these these mess the fist of please isn't that Superman villain Jesus so what are the three we have we have incubus

was it was a kind of a runner-up that's right Azabel and the Leelan's go back go back the belly in there just go hit the back button

Lamia Laamia Laamela and Azizel All right I'm gonna get a hold of Tucker somehow I'm gonna pay even if I just put it on the next car say give this to the man I'll just

Mail it to him I'll put I'll put postage paid you fill out the address I don't want to know where you live I don't need to know where you live Just get this message to the man Or maybe I just follow him on Twitter or something But thanks so much for tuning in you know like and subscribe

hit the notification bell Patreon.com.combexra episode every week thanks so much and we'll be back next week with a full size full size episode and more demons we're going to have updates about this talk to you soon

Thank you.