Kump - Ep. 245 YOU'RE GOING TO IRAN

Episode Date: March 16, 2026

Ray discusses the impending draft, the Straight of Hormuz, and much more. patreon.com/raykump⁠ for bonus episodes

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Now let's change it for the better. It's a new work day. Welcome to Comp. I'm speaking today on behalf of the military industrial complex. In the coming weeks, most of you will be drafted to fight in Iran as a part of Operation Epic Fury. Fury. It's Fury? All right.

If you were between the ages of 18 and 70, you'll be shipped off to a Walmart parking lot somewhere in the greater Detroit area, where you'll be stripped, shaven, dewormed, and minimally trained for one week, and then flown to the jewel of the floor. former Persian Empire. You will land in a foreign country where you don't speak the language of the locals or you're commanding officers. Or do Israelis speak English? We'll put a pin on that. You'll be given unclear objectives,

shoddy outdated intel, and random guns lent to us by al-Qaeda. And you'll be finally give something back to this country, which is given so much to your parents who have given you so little. Some of you will say this is an unnecessary war that was waged to distract from the Epstein files,

where that Israel is essentially riding the United States into the ground like Legolas when he shot arrows into that elephant in lower the rings. Or that Tucker Carlson sold us out to Iran because he's a young-ean trickster archetype who may work for the CIA, but even the CIA isn't sure. But all of that is irrelevant now. We have thus far failed to secure the straight-of-horm moves. Iran is requiring all oil shipments to be priced in Chinese yuan, and the United States petro dollar is on the verge of collapse.

If you think we're going to let you sit this one out and place polymarket bets on dogfights, while other people solve the mess we needlessly created, and you are clearly overvaluing your role in the dwindling American Empire. I don't care what important job you think you have that prevents you from getting into the shit, but I assure you it's about, to be taken by a souped up Apple Watch.

And in response to that, is that it can't actually do your job properly. Look around and ask yourself if we care. You may be saying, hey, hold on, I'm a 40-year-old neurodivergent. I'm a morbidly obese fentanyl addict with sleep apnea. Or I'm in a wheelchair, and I have no face. We know.

We read your resume. You're going to Iran. You may be saying, I have children and there's no one to watch them. That's fine. They can come too. You're going to Iran. You may be saying, I have no loyalty to the United States. And I will seek out, I'll just sell out my country at the drop of a dime.

I'll get a lot of people killed. I'll actually do a lot of damage to our country. And that's just our country, the people who make money. Hold on us. We'll stop you right there. We may have a management position for you. You. Critics online have been yapping, nonstop about how impenishable Iran is to invaders.

They say it hasn't been conquered since Alexander the Great. Well, don't be down on yourself. Maybe you're the next Al-Granda the Great. Who knows? I know when many of you picture Iran, you're picturing a giant desert or sand with camels, like Lawrence of Arabia or the Mummy Films. And you may be right. I'm really not sure.

They say you're supposed to be mountains there somewhere, but it's a big country. The good news is we'll figure it out together. Now keep in mind, there are a lot of jobs in the military that don't involve being in combat, all sorts of technicians and logistics officers and cooks, and you won't be doing any of them. Let's be honest, we don't have time to train you in logistics or helicopter repair or how to cook spaghetti. Does it seem to you like anyone still cares about logistics? No, here's what's going to happen. We're going to hand you a gun and point you towards an office building,

and we're just going to see how it goes. If you shoot innocent civilians, women, children, it's unclear. But rest assured, if anyone's going to jail, it's going to be you. Best case, you'll have neutralized a target of dubious military value, which must have been there for some economic reason, but who cares? To us, it might as well been a bouncy castle. and someone will get paid to rebuild it or maybe we'll just have you swim around

in a straight or form moves looking for landmines I'm sure you're asking yourself what do you want with a bunch of fat lazy pampered whining malcontents anyway I thought the military was more elite now than ever highly trained and capable special forces aided by cutting edge technology

fighting asymmetric battles across a countless underscrowed battlefield simultaneously and you'd be right they are damn impressive which is precisely why those are the men we hire as private security for the wealthy elites of this country to protect them for people like you which may seem like overkill and this is exactly the point regardless we can't go having our future private bodyguards all dying in some poorly timed war of buffoonery but this is your chance to prove your worth to the new emerging paradigm

Times like these are when fortunes are made by us. Just remember, Iran has 600,000 ground troops. Good luck. So I was emailed to me today. I'm ready for me. I'm getting something. It's not your business, what I'm getting off of that. But, you know, it's a strange time.

It's a challenging set of, you know, it doesn't matter where you were a week ago. you know we we no one really knows why we got into this the way we did uh but now it's become abundantly clear that apparently the most important place in the world is this is a straight of hormel chili that was that's that's a little hanging fruit hormes homoose they say it correctly is straight of hormoos which you know i mean some people get snippy online about how how could you say the military doesn't have plans for the straight of hormoos how could you say that Well, we have plans for everything. I know.

I grew up thinking we had plans for everything. I grew up, you know, I don't know. I'm not, I wasn't in the army. But I remember hearing all these guys, we get on Fox News or meet the press, these generals. They go, so not who's saying better watch his ass, because we got plans for every, if he fucking, if he fucks my wife, I got a plan.

Well, I got a plan. There's all sorts of scenarios. And they also told us there was, you know, service to air missiles in the back of the white. house that could shoot down a you know I guess I might have been a myth though I guess they didn't want to shoot down that Pentagon plane right it's fine no but they have plans of her moves they have plans to you know they didn't use them they decided you know if we use our plan we might tip our hand I don't you know you telling me this is this is a war

for the petro dollar right that's the idea that basically that's what's on the line and people get people still I mean some people think we're on a gold standard still which is crazy I guess because there's gold at Fort Knox and I guess because they sort of die hard three where I mean I don't know if there is actually gold

in the basement of the Fed I think that's gone I think that's what they stole 9-11 probably right that's the river of gold to Giuliani who's like get that just get that gold put it in my trunk let's go let's go Disneyland together. We can all get,

we all get well. We got, where are our beaks? But, you know, it hasn't been a gold state or almost ever, but, you know, especially since, you know, Nixon closed the gold window

after Britain wins ended. And, uh, it wasn't immediate. It was like a three-year guy, you know, we're kind of, I think we were kind of wafing around in a,

in a, in a, unpegged economy, yeah, but we, we quickly, relatively quickly in a couple of years, got OPEC basically agreed

informally it seems like though if you look in the ways like it's not really they didn't have to I guess but informally agreed to price everything in US dollars and you would think it doesn't at first glides you might not think it matters that much what you know

well you just trade you know you can just I mean I can go to a window right and just you know swap my currency I mean nowadays I can go online probably and swap my you know dollars for you on you know I could have a synobut in one hand at the airport and buy a bunch of Chinese yuan,

I think, I've never done it. I mean, maybe that's not available at LaGuardia. But I see these kiosks. You can buy currency, but it doesn't work that way. The idea, I guess, is you have to have so much on hands and there's currency risk, right? And you have to, currency has to be in demand. There's a lot going on here.

I mean, this is where you're going to realize that I'm not actually an economist. For years, people have said, you know so much about the economy. and I mean, not economists, but you know, other people. I go, I don't, I mean, thank you. But you wouldn't have to see the limits of my knowledge. But no, but it's, so the idea is that basically if you have, you look, if people don't have demand, first of all, let's just something straight.

If people don't have an exorbitant demand, let's just say. And unnatural demand, they undo. I mean, these things are a low. words here, but basically, if they don't have another reason to buy the U.S. dollar, then it's all kind of just based on, like, well, how good is the U.S. dollar? You've been asking yourself for years, like, why these countries want to hold our dollars, or, you know, all we do is have debt, right? It's like, why is it a good investment?

Like, we have, you know, we have trillions of dollars of debt. I guess that we're backed by the military in theory, but like, why invest, I mean, was not going anywhere? And that's what, but, you know, oh, because they have to. some of it's because you know it's stable and it's good interest rates but also it's kind of like with taxes where you have to buy well you have to historically or not just america one of the ways that currencies or adopt will kind of force on to people because back you know the idea of nation using you know look at europe for instance there was a european history there's been tons of examples i think of

like countries using other countries currency as their thing right not i mean this century but like in medieval history and stuff. Because what happens is the king was just, you know, basically the base to curry. He was like, yeah, let's kill the coins. As the coins come back and we clip the coins and then we keep some of it. They don't know. It's kind of, it was a medieval or even the ancient world did it. Way of doing a inflation, you know, monetary inflation.

And so people get wise to it. They're not dumb. So, you know, if you, if you, if the diversion of a bank run, we're just, you know, we're not going to use your currency. so they were forced you to pay the taxes in their currency. So there was a demand. Demand is very important. And the same way, you need a demand for U.S. dollars.

Because we're just a country of just, you know, a bunch of in-ground pools finance on credit cards. And also, you know, I guess the deficit is a big, it's a lot of debt. I mean, it's so much debt. I would just not pay it. I would just tell people, we can just work something. How about how about we pay a half? Does everyone have a thought of that?

Then we just said, hey, what if we just decide to pay half? That seems like a, or a quarter. Like, you know, I'll go to Sweden. I'm like, you know, these guys in these fucking Swiss banks, you know, like a wolf of Wall Street, he's fucking smug fucks. I know you think you're like, he's finance bros. But like, we're falling apart. And we'll, you know, we'll just, I'll just like, you know,

this building I'll just someone drop on it I'll fucking have a satellite drop on this building on the way out how about we you know this is this is like here's the thing

and you go oh it's not fair I thought Ray was against Empire and he's not a warmonger sure but let's not pretend that we're not we're only in this because of our greed you know when someone lends you a bunch of money they know what's up

you know when someone lends you gives you a credit card pay it back. You know, they're pricing in the risk. And if they haven't priced in the risk, then they're doing it because they're not, like, it's not their money probably. Some guy who works there, and the whole thing's cooked.

But they'll tell you, you're irresponsible. Well, how irresponsible will it be to have a satellite drop in your mom's house? You know, that's just, people have forgotten what civilization is at the end of the day. civilization is basically like it starts out like there's a fault position is you get hit the head of the rock you take your food you take your woman and then like you know and it gets messier from there like it's not good you know that's the fault like we do these things because like you know

we make it's about compromise you like the powerful give up the right to just take everything by force but you also can't you know what do they get in return I guess that they get they get smart people who can scale societies because you know people hit you with Iraq don't tend to know how to do irrigation

or you know or infrastructure you know something you know I don't think Genghis Khan was the guy who invented the algebra back in the day or it was a Pythagrium theorem I mean it's Pythagrhus but you get my point

that you you know people have different skills and that's why we get together and we make these compromises but you can't just act if you're going to put someone against the wall they're going to flail

and if it's going to be like this you know if you've allowed America to be the police of the world and you're just you know you're the bankers you know underwriting this you know insane debt what do you think was going to happen by buying these trade now

oh you forced our hand by treasure by buying you know we had the buy on for the petro dollar. I don't get why they haven't done this sooner. I don't get why Iran, for instance, didn't, like, you know, the idea is supposed to be we provide security for these Gulf states, right? It makes it stable for them. And then we did for, like, Saudi Arabia and then.

But Iran seems to be getting a bone end of the deal. Because, like, all we do is, like, you know, we sanction them. And we're only able to sanction it. Getting ready for a game means being ready for anything. packing a spare stick. I like to be prepared. That's why I remember 988, Canada's suicide crisis helpline. It's good to know, just in case. Anyone can call or text for free confidential support from a train responder anytime. 988 suicide crisis helpline is funded by the government in Canada.

Because, you know, we have to go through dollars, we have to go to U.S. banks, and then we just, yeah, they have to follow U.S. regulations. They just bypass all that, which, interestingly enough, Who is the notable people what's a notable time when someone bypassed you know they were an OPEC and they actually did this actually you know do you know I'll give you a second at home who was the OPEC nation who tried pricing their oil in a in euros in 2000 the year 2000 interesting time was that quote oh Iraq interesting very interesting

am i saying that's a reason i'm not i'm position to say anything i mean there's plenty of logical reasons we went into iraq i mean there was a weapons they didn't have and we wanted to make it was the chaos we wanted to start i mean there was a lot of torture to do so i mean we didn't have to do it for the reason of you know people oh it didn't really amount to much because they had a lot of sanctions then there was there's the idea that you

you basically you can bypass the sanctions but they also had the uh UN restriction on the oil it's a lot of people basically you can own oil and it really that was a wasn't a good guy so i'm not like defending and i get why you know it's very caught why you go into kuwait well it's complicated why he would you'd have to you it's very it's very interesting to think why he would do it without our approval but it doesn't he maybe he thought he had it but but it's a matter regardless I'm not saying like we there shouldn't be some and for but I mean what is this indefinite like 30 years of just you know sanctions do you own are you are you a sovereign

nation or not we're playing these games of like we're gonna tell people what they can and then but don't go to China and like maybe we play this different like they wouldn't feel you have to go to China maybe if you were just now if we were just a little more chill we could You know, it's like, why are we like constantly like yo-yoing around and then making people see, when you act like a maniac, people go maybe, you know, I don't think anyone 15 years ago were like, well, China seems more reasonable. I think everyone was like, China seemed kind of weird. They've been by themselves, they were by themselves for a long time, right?

Like kind of isolated. And all of a sudden, it would just skyrocketing economy. I think everyone, I think the, I think the OPEC nations were probably creeped out I mean, I'm sure people were like, there's a lot of money to be made. But I mean, you know, if we, if we were, if we play our cards different, you know, people wouldn't, you know, we allowed the Chinese Yuan to become a desirable thing. Plus we just, you know, we, we why rain in your credit card debts? I get it. It's fun, you know, this is, I doesn't see, here's the thing.

It doesn't seem like we can fix anything to be fair. That's really, it all starts way further out in the end to society's collapsing. That's my thing. I think they realized this back like in the 60s. They knew it was over. They basically did, like, I mean, honestly, even they, they, World War II happens. We get, like, our empire.

It was building up for a while, but we become the fucking top dog. And we were never considered, like, the, you know, we were always seemed kind of like, you know, the rogues, the, uh, irresponsible ones, the wild, new world, the people who went to America were in the aristocrats.

And so, you know, I bet a bunch of people in like Lichtenstein were dreading that we were going to become, you know, the fact of finance capital of the world, you know, whatever, these are these old, but who cares to fuck about them, right? But I'm just saying, this is like, and, you know,

you wonder if they kind of saw this coming a little bit, that we were just like completely, we didn't grow gracefully at all. We kind of took this Breton Wood system which is basically that the rest of the world

has to like buy you hold U.S. dollars as their reserve currency. We hold, you know, they give us their gold. We hold it. Right? We give, you know,

at $35 an ounce, I believe it was a deal. And then they basically, in their banks, they just hold a bunch of dollars, metaphorically or literally, as their reserve currency. And this is kind of the same idea

the petro dollar where it gives a undue reason to have dollars which means that our shit doesn't get inflated and so you know and we immediately just start spending and then expand and like they get wise to it like wait a you're just fucking spending on the back of our you know the effects of a curve of inflation are like you know there it's all dispersed because we're all holding the dollars there's like way more dollars than would be needed by your country that you know to do shit like if you're Whatever currents, whatever amount of dollars that would be needed for, you know, the United States by itself to operate, as we say.

Absent of these others, you know, I don't even mean like without international trade. I just mean without like all those other shit on top of the Brentwoods or the petro dollar shit. It's like a lot less dollars than you would need. So it's like the idea is that you're basically, there's more value is what the value per dollar is different. So you can basically just, you know, spend money. the inflation comes later, right? Like, you know, when the Fed prints money, if I'm the first guy to get it,

I'm sitting like a pagan shit. And then, you know, there's only later on when people are going to get through the economy and then the inflation, you know, the effects of this shit happens. Again, I'm no economist. I'm just the, I'm just the PhD. I didn't focus in economics.

I focused in a dog, dog washing. Now, So what happens if people start going, give me that Chinese yuan, baby, we're going to price our shit in wants. Or is it wands? Yuan, right? Give me that yuan.

I want the yuan. Million till you want. You know, it's basically less demand for the dollar means you have to base to sell bond or, you know, you have to raise the interest rate effectively. These are very,

I mean, I say loose, but I mean, it kind of is the idea. Like, you know, the interest rate is basically the price of borrowing. And so if there's a lot of demand for dollars, then you don't have to charge a, you know, if there's a lot of demand for dollars, you can charge a high interest rate, which means, you know what I'm saying. Basically, wait, the interest rate is lower.

See, what I'm talking about. It's confusing. They've relied on for decades on you not understanding this stuff. I can understand it when you put an article in front of me. but now facing the barrel of a gun I'm you know it's like it's like yeah you would you what you think is fair I'm saying maybe we just you know maybe we have to

there's going to be a draft there's nothing they can do they really shouldn't have done this I don't know why they did it this time they're saying that like oh well there's a protest in the streets and they wanted to capitalize on that and they want it before they ended so they wanted to rush into this but I I'm saying last but I feel like you

It's possible that that was just kind of, is it possible? Some of that was a little enhanced. But, you know, maybe a little soros type thing. Maybe, maybe Assad or say, I mean, it's not like we've never been known to agitate in Iran.

But we go, let's just say it was natural completely. They wanted to rush into, I don't think, I mean, what is the, here's the thing, if you're going to overthrow a country and expect someone to take over, you can't just assume, it's got to be arranged.

it's like when you have like a if you're gonna meet someone for like some people will be oh maybe we want to dinner and like a Friday like some place like some trendy place well we got we get in a resume we got planned this we can't you know we'll just show up at you know LaBernadanne

on a Saturday night and say hey maybe you got any fish for us the fancy place this was the best analogy you got to organize these things you have to have like generals you have to have a plan in place you have to if you're not going to any kind of ground troops you need to have I mean apparently the the the um

Pahlavi this is the Shah's kid has his own little militia and they were there in Iran in January supposedly uh do we have the name for one second Raza Kalavi militia whatever it's called the red lions or something whatever he we care you can join uh ex-crown prince it doesn't matter the point is he has these guys and apparently they're they're going to go right around now they should have been there the whole time everyone's everyone's too worried about their own skin i feel like everyone's too like oh we have to kind of protect our shit it's no good you need these people need to fucking you got you got you got you got put like

back in the day i feel like everyone was a little more just willing to get their feet their feet dirty it's like everyone's too afraid to get missing a missing a fucking limb i mean yet and yahoo's there where is Netanyahu he's he's he might be missing a hand now apparently there's some videos the morning where he was uh getting the coffee he's like I love my coffee but that sounds kind of generic too is that anyone verify if that's real I mean twir's been going crazy for a few days because Netanyahu might be you know we keep we keep killing their leader over there and I ran Netanyahu I don't know if he got hit or not

but I mean it feels like he's on TV every day and then he's just kind of made probably just I mean if I was him I'd have I would just be I have body doubles but also like I'd make Galgadat be like my my mistress but that I don't mean like force her I mean like pretend like like she'd have to go around and one of my body doubles if I didn't try to original I make Galga that nuts I'm saying she'd have to like she's actress but I'm saying it's like you know you you have these like just to kind of raise your profile like if you're gonna do it's sell it because that way it's like it's like slender hand shit and it's like you know it's kind of like you know they're looking at god godad you know you you may not like i gotta you know as an actress or you may think she's a

you know she she she's into the genocide i don't like it well regardless she's a beautiful woman this is the classic classic move you have you have a beautiful woman distract from the fact that you're you're body double to the irate say as the prime minister you know stuff like that um i would have you know i would i would i would i would i would I would have a body double like me. I'd make him learn to do like break dancing. I'd make him learn to, um, what the kids like skateboard.

Imagine if he was a guy who looked just like, I mean, that's too much. What could he do that would be impressive? Maybe just do cool gun shit. I would, I would have a guy. I was trained. I would have him trained to do like those cool trick shots.

And he would go into like the middle of like, you know, Tel Aviv and like, shoot Apple. off people's heads. It would be a thing. I mean, I make crazy videos where basically there'd be like a few people,

there's a bunch of cameras like a practical jokers or whatever and there'd be a bunch of cameras and basically you're watching a video and this guy, whatever he's doing, he's a street magician

and whatever he's supposed to be and he goes like and the person agrees to be part of whatever this gimmick is. He goes, okay, I'm going to put an apple on your head and the apple's going to disappear

and then and they agree with it's a little pound whatever bullshit and then there's a little, Don't get in between. It's going to be a crazy drone shot that goes from him to him. I'm picturing like where you see where you see the bullet explode and like I'm like I'm the president.

I can waste a lot of money. I take a lot of money off the United States. So why not have a little fun with it? And so basically we're going to do those bullet time cameras. And it's going to be a thing where, you know, it's going to be a bull, you know, the apple's going to disappear. And then the bullet time shot all the way through a crowd of people. And it's not working, like most of these people are not involved.

And you realize that Netanyahu, Bibi Netanyahu has trick-shoted with a gun, the apple. I'm like a mile, or not a mile away, a large distance away, like a real, like a real badass anime character. I would do things like that to boost my image. You have to be bigger than the game when you're in charge. You have to be a mythic figure.

And they waste all this time, just gloating about people dying being miserable just starting wars you can start less wars if you have more gravitas why not spend time

you know gangis con probably put like six babies on spikes I bet you that's true I don't know for sure I mean you know people are going to come at me the guy from who Joe Roe we used to have on

Mr. on Joe Road was a hardcore history guy the hardcore history guy he hears this upon well i have he had a thousand spikes i watched all the babies die i'm sorry but i'm gonna i'm gonna go out there make a limb make an assumption

he only killed six babies and that's enough don't get me wrong that's still i put him in jail if i could you you put six babies on spikes and maybe later on you don't got put any babies on spikes because the people go that's a baby spike guy don't know if i don't around now i don't think you should have you know is that the Is it the best way to lead?

You know, the schools of thoughts. I'm not making, I'm, I didn't invent the wheel here saying, you know, be brutal up front. But, you know, but it's a thing. But now, because here's the thing, you go, that's disgusting. Well, sure, it's not ideal. I mean, I'm hearing and telling you, I'm going to do, I'm going to do, you know, hidden camera trick shots. So I'm in a different school of thought here.

But I will say that the brutality up front thing, uh, makes more sense than just brutality all the time. Which is what they do now over there. They just shoot a bit with the baby on the spiking and what does this lead to more bit more babies on spite? I mean What you mean? It's like what is? What does the hammer and nail? You hammer and that is what you do for a living? What is pouring for frozen yogurt into a cone lead to you eat you eat you eat dead babies I like that baby joke the point is Gangus Khan might have understood theatricality to call the Batman movie

And I'll take it further, this is the theatricality of like, you know, so maybe, maybe he's taking a lesson from me. Maybe, maybe Nanyahu will come up. Well, no, he released a video of him drinking coffee. So he squandered it. If there was me, it would have been like, oh, you don't know I was dead. I would have myself coming out of a hospital. There'd be like someone filming me waking. This wouldn't even be hard.

You'd have someone filming him waking up. You release security for the just structurally. to cut the gatherers in cameras of him going like no i got i got to protect the people i got to fight for freedom some bullshit he's going oh i love my coffee that's just they're they're so egotistical is my point they're so they'd rather just look cool or just and by cool i just mean like a non-ploid it's not cool but just like you know fuck you yeah nothing you want ever happens like you want everyone's a troll on some level those old troll, you know, impulses,

where the best thing you could do is just make someone feel bad. Oh, I can't believe we're going to own them, but, you know, can't wait a way to these fucking libs, see this fucking, this fucking guy, see how much he doesn't give a shit about, um, I'm trying to think people getting, you know, AIDS. I don't care. People who have AIDS, I like it.

And go, oh, my God, wait till the Dem see this. Wait till those Democrats see this video. I get it. People shouldn't get emotional. It's annoying. But, you know, it can't, your whole thing can't be like, you know, just trying to, like, troll people. And that's what it is to not, like, you know, you have to be willing to be, we get what I'm saying here. The point is you go in a war. You personally. And what do you care? This is not going to be, look, I'm outspoken about it. You know, there was a thing online a couple days ago about plumbers. like oh everyone's gonna be a rich a rich plumber now you know you know that they've been lying to you when all of a sudden the the the AI rationale is like well no you'll just be a plumber really wealthy because you're a plumber what yeah yeah I know I know you're like a middling you may be like making a hundred grand a year as a coder and that's you thought that was a scarce job but actually you're gonna have to become a plumber now and you're gonna make a half

a million dollars a year now I've always said people should try to to get jobs in the trades then you might make more like you know people assume just because you're you're not doing labor you're making more more money but like a lot of guys are in demand and like you have to you know but you know a point is uh it doesn't seem like a if everyone's going to be doing it why why we all of a sudden it's only it's only like that valuable because people aren't doing it and we're all going to do it and get right i mean that wasn't the plan before wasn't the whole thing well we don't have to work, which is both, who would do that? Who would set this up?

I mean, you see what it takes to set this up? Petro dollars? And like, you know, they're going to mine the straighter-form moves? I mean, we don't know. Here's the thing, if they mine the strata-form moves, that's a problem for them, too. I don't know if it's mined. Right now, you're able to hit it with missiles.

I don't know. Why isn't Israel just bring the iron dome to the straight-er-form? moves can they do is it is it portable like what is the you know let's can we can we can we find the iron or what is the iron dome they probably won't I look at something will probably try to put me in jail what is the iron door it's a system it's a protective system it's a shell the mobile all-weather air defense system developed by Israel to intercept and destroy short-range rock oh it's mobile yeah so bring it to the straightforward moves just drop it there can't I mean I can't

I can't believe this thing. I can't believe we didn't figure this how you could do this. Like I look, did I have a plan off the top of my head? No, I didn't realize that I even know what the three or four moves was. I might have known at one point and I forgot. But that's not my job. We've really lost track of whose job is what in this country. You know, we used to have like, you know, people who just took pride and everything and like, oh, you go to a hotel and I'm the guy who does a hotel stuff. And I'm the top dog hotel guy. I'm the guy who makes the diner. Like, no one cares. Everyone seems to just say, everyone's like, fuck you.

Everyone's vibe is just very much like, who cares of shit? I'm, I'm, because you know, what we do is show fucking, you know, images of wealthy people, people's asses all day, right? All we do is just fucking make people watch rich people take Buckel fat out of their face. All day long, constantly. All, I mean, it's just, it's just like a bunch of people. Kelly Osborne. I mean, what's up with her?

She looks like a vampire. woman and they're putting her on the cover I mean what's that mean yeah it would be if you didn't put it on like you're putting out on the cover of frigging like you know uh vogue and stuff these these people this whole this whole system is they say oh it's so low IQ to call it's atan it's ever been my move to call it all satanic but you're not giving people much of a alternative uh viable theory I used to oh yeah my whole thing was always oh no it's not of course it's not Satan but there's a natural they are sometimes saying this but it's part of a social thing they do

but really there's like socioeconomic reasons for all the it's like there's less and less rationale it seems to be that we just all want to be dead on one way or the other no one seems to like have any faith in this I mean why the people building AI must know it's not good they must realize this is like I mean what is ever what has ever gone well um and this kind of thing like

initially right like the mistakes couldn't be higher and look is it is it because it could be sky net that's always get me in the back of your head and if it's not that you're kind of a uh that's not you know you should have that in the back of your head oh well it's just you know it's a fucking movie it's a sci-fi movie look I don't like an advertiser but James Cameron's a smart enough guy, right? He didn't he build a submarine to find the Titanic? He's not, he's not, he's not, he's not, he's not, he's not, he's not, he's not ratner.

And he wrote, I mean, I'm not saying he knows, like he understood, you know, LLM, AI, what's going to happen in the 80s. But stop acting like it was, it was, it was freaking made by Roger Corman. All right. The guy is, uh, and it's just something to think that, you know, like, you know, like, he was, he was, he, if someone goes hey why can't sky that happen i mean it wants a movie yeah but why that should be easy to dismiss right like why can't the even why can't ironman well here's why that suit i bet you some physicists could tell you why the ironman suit wouldn't work why it's kind of dumb they they love to

point this shit out you get adrian newie the f1 aerodynamicist i bet he'll tell you why the ironman suits garbage right and i bet you uh you know there's guys who will tell you why Jurassic Park probably wouldn't work I think they did back in the day you love you know I mean you know there's really a smart sci-fi thing but no one's telling you why you know they they don't really give you good reasons why it's not my thing I'm not even making the case that that that AI is gonna be sky net like Terminator 2 but you're so glib and you go it doesn't have to be sky net it just has to be a thing where everyone gets like you look look at the the just how the housing crisis went crazy because of you know credit the

full swaps. You know? The whole world, we're on the brink of economic collapse because of credit fucking, because AIG was just giving everything, a ton of reasons, a ton of factors.

One big one, like, amongst it all, AIG is just underwriting everything with no thought to anything. And there's a lot of reasons why it led to that. But my point is like, you know, because of the rise and prevalence of the credit default swap

in the context of mortgage you know back securities relatively obscure little thing and you're talking about like just displacing and not like one a woman or the horse and buggy right there was one thing like you you're not replacing everything at once and like the horse and buggy i mean does anyone does a study i mean when did like the cars kind of came about i'll tell you something here uh when did cars uh uh uh replace some buggy. I got a thing here. Marvel Television's Wonder Man. An eight-episode series. Now streaming

on Disney Plus. A superhero remake. Not exactly what we'd expect from an Oscar winning director. Action! Simon Williams. Audition for Wonder Man. I'm going to need you to sign this. Assuming you don't have superpowers. I'll never work again if anyone found out. My lips are sealed.

Marvel Television's Wonder Man. episodes now streaming only on Disney Plus between 1910 and 1930 hmm now it's a mysterious claim here I know it's a spurious claim but have you looked into it I look into it I mean what happened there what what is that for World War I was World War I caused by the displacement of horse and buggy people probably not but do we know and that's just horse and buggies. I mean, let me let me let me ask an AI that this is not my most reliable way to go about living your life, but we're going to see what it says. You know, let's tell me I'm a re- or a moron. Let's see. I'll type of to Google and that AI that AI sucks,

but we'll see. Did the displacement of horse and buggies I, uh, the automobile, have any effect or contribute at all so I'll do contribute contribute at all to to the onset of World War I let's see what it says yes the displacement of horse-drawn carriages by Ordnmobile con could well-mobiles continued and in fact rapidly accelerated between the turn of the century and the onset of World War I while horse-row carriages were still No, wait, what's the thing I said? Hold on, no.

Oh, continue. Or they're correct that we continue. Contribute. This is the thing. This is how the world ends. Contribute it all to the answer. Yes, displacement of, uh, then accelerating the industrial capacity

for mechanized warfare and shifting logistics. Well, the horse was still the dominant, I don't know. This has been a little bit of a detour here. I'll admit. It wasn't the strongest. But I think I might be right here. we're good you know this is this is actually this might might be as crazy as I thought

imagine if I can come forward oh man I can I could I could be the guy I'm gonna actually start doing I'm gonna make a video I've decided to really lean into furious claims and and just being a kind of not fraud but what's the one level above or below that you know I'm not gonna not not fact check it anymore so I'm gonna come I'm gonna come out with a video about how actually your horse-scoring carriage you keep talking about caused World War I so there you go and people get on board people that who's that that the Asian guy the doctor's the the teacher he's talking about the war he gets like a million views that was why I watched the day first I was like I mean I have three theories one of them we're going to send ground troops in like all right like that's barely a theory at this point like we're talking about

and he's like oh I mean I don't know people just won confidence I'll be confident. I'll be very confident and I'll tell people that I'm I'm actually who can I be? Who died who I could be? Maybe I'm a reincarnated guy. I'm the guy who

who died who I like. I'm Phyllis who I like. I'm Phyllisian. I'm actually and that's who's going to follow me? This is making sense. What am I babbling about I'm Mussolini I'm Mussolini and I'm I got a bunch of guys that you don't know where they are so we have you know I bet you Pittsburgh would have me on and today we also were joined by Ray Kump who claims that he's the reincarnated Mussolini

and you uh and he has a new mafia well why do you have a new mafia uh yeah I was just talking shit and I'm like well we're actually our new mafia is about is about you know preventing AI from taking over the world who put you in charge of fighting the AI and I'm just and I'm like well yeah no one I got guns you know and look I know muslim he died poorly didn't they like rape him to death Mussolini so probably asking about that weren't you raped to dad like yeah it's the worst day of my life next question why'd you ask that but crass this a crass man asked me be getting raped to death crazy times this is the streeter how was I ran the whole the street of her moves

It was much of a mess. Developing weapons that could threaten the entire global economy. And now that the countries at war, it has started to use them. The conflict has all but frozen commercial shipping, and at the heart of the crisis is a narrow waterway that Iran is holding hostage. The Strait of Hormuz is the choke point leading into and out of the Persian Gulf, and it's bordered by Iran's coastline. And as the world is seeing, they are exercising sheer desperation in the straits of

Even though Iran doesn't have jurisdiction over the strait, it has long threatened to use force to shut it down. Before the war, Iran had stockpiled sea mines that it could lay across the strait, dispersed coastal defense cruise missiles that could be fired at ships from the shore, created a fleet of small boats known to swarm and threaten vessels, and deployed submarines to lurk in strategic waterways. I'm sure there was a thing we could have done with just drones. I mean you tell me you have all this shit you don't have a system in place like this is one of the big hot spots all we do is talk shit about Iran all we do is be like yeah they're gonna fucking and we act like you know it is funny that we make such a big deal but they can't have a nuke because it really implies that like you know they can't do anything else which look they've been decimated

they're gonna be wrong but then if it wasn't a problem you wouldn't be wouldn't be at this impasse but you know if you're gonna be the great that's the thing the whole point is you're spending a trillion dollars a year build the shit there works like what are you doing they we know the pentagon is like bloated and they build weird shit and they don't adapt to the times because it can't just be a little corrupt it's got to be like the most corrupt shit where it's like we're still buying probably like shit from 1980s you know just useless crap bullets for guns that we don't even have anymore just you know like just phantom shipments who knows because like if you came to go

hey we're gonna what we're doing here we're gonna sell a bunch of like you know you're your president wants to cut the cut the budget right the military budget you go hey I'm all for defending the country but do we really need all this shit uh oh we cut something if we use as a bill of school

I don't know you you that guy and you come in and they go you know what are you doing well we're building a bunch of little mini submarine drones Mr. President that you know go and find these mines and they and they whatever they expand those sort of darper weird MIT shit you know they they they inflate suddenly into like eight times their size to trigger the mind to blow up to clear out this shit in the day you know what's the cost six trillion dollars what's very

expensive you know hey who the fuck sent you here where didn't you get the memo who i mean who is this guy he's the president yeah i don't know i'm trying to act off nothing you can do about it the money's spent is that like that's still corrupt what I'm describing but that we have a thing where it's like what are you doing oh I'm just filling these molds with brass what are they like bullets no it's just brass what's it cost three trillion dollars it needs to be a better way we need to actually be the great you know the grassroots military of all time we have to be the supermen we have I mean I mean you know be able to shoot as many civilians as possible as quick as possible if you just

didn't do it do it there's no point in being like the roman empire but also like fucking half ass it you got i mean it's got to be more i you're gonna blame the troops sometimes maybe but this seems more like the general i'm like you know the president's erratic i bet if he i mean we have we actually have a good plan he might have said yeah i mean is is israel's fault is this bebebe he like you know is he is he is a baby in the situation room the joint chiefs like well actually we want security no I don't need don't don't secure that train of home really

and he's just fucking he's just got like a pimp cup and he's drinking fucking kovassie and he's just listening to fucking biggie like you know turn them up or whatever you know some gangster rap I can't it doesn't it bears

strange credulity to see why this would happen I we grew up in the country or at least we were fighting terrorists why we should really it's funny like they didn't even do like a false flag really not a big one they don't want you they they're sick of they're sick of having the fake things because that's a political scandal right that's the thing you fake something and then it's like you got people start asking questions you know how did that why did that bullet not not go off charlie's neck 30 out six to the neck

they have a doctor saying he got the strongest neck in the world that stuff is 30 out six rounds well that's interesting very interesting so well a lot of shit yeah keep answering questions if you if you just don't give an explanation you just fucking be like fuck it why are we going to iran because fuck them that's why they came to us and they said we have 10 nukes we'll have them the day i mean they wouldn't verify that why would they do that why would they lie about it well we got i mean doesn't seem like they're that dumb see there's something it seems like that's the verbal equivalent of a throwdown pistol. You know, like when you

a cop shoot somebody and they, oh, if it's a mistake, like, fuck. I, you know, I was in a casino. He had a hero sandwich. I thought it was a gun. And so you throw a pistol in his hand. Yeah, yeah, the marked pistol. What we're going to? Steering that were filed off.

That's what we did. We go, and they said they had a bunch of uranium. We probably planted it on them. I don't know. It just, uh, But we'll get you can't at this point Here's the thing at this point is as unfair as it seems You really can't not go in I guess because then we're gonna collapse though I mean is it is it okay for the people of America? The collapse now

I mean if we just secure whore moves Is that enough? What if we just like if we just go in and make the boat okay for the boats? There's no way to do that though, right? Because these fucking missiles are like everywhere It's a real pickle. It really kind of kind of kind of back this into a corner here. I say we nuke ourselves. That's that that's honestly like maybe the

thing that no one sees coming. It's like, you know, we just nuke ourselves and the whole world. Because like we're, it's not going to get. This is going to be like a real messy couple, a bunch of years.

We're not going to end gracefully. I mean, do you, I mean, you're going to be eating dogs and cats and your, and your wife and your, and your mother cooking them up like cannibals. You know what you want it when the petrodoll collapse is you're gonna become a cannibal

You're gonna you're gonna fucking see your kids and you're not gonna think of them as your kids anymore you're gonna think of them as meat I'm not just saying Oh This is this is this is this is this is the irony this is this is the fucking thing This is why they release the Epstein files to show you what like what's coming. I mean look, that's not what the implication of those guys they did and and when times were good, and they're still eating kids, apparently. But they're basically putting in your head. Now you're kind of sitting there going, oh, fuck.

That, you know, this is, this is when the rules go away, and these are the people in charge, that is it going to get better or can get worse? I feel like if we're already this bad, then we have like a function in society, what's America going to look like when the petrodollars collapses? We're all going to be farmers? Are we all going to whittle and camp in the woods and make fires?

I don't know. I mean, it's probably, maybe. Maybe we'll all become, you know, we'll go back, when we get back into apple cider and we'll get back into logging. And it'll become a great nation again. I tend to feel like we're just going to, you know, it's, I mean, I don't, the population density has never occurred, I feel like. combine in a situation where you have a societal collapse like this

to be very interesting this is why by the way you don't overinflate that you don't overcook the books you know you know you don't fucking grease the tracks quite so vigorously because you know you don't know how to slow train down it's a fast moving train you're just gonna be like oh I guess it's just fucking it's a lot of fun doesn't make any sense uh who should be maybe i should be in charge right around why this put me in charge because i mean no one no one's gonna like be threatened by me like you know i'm not in charge

we're a viceroy vice ray it can be good for everyone oh man we get straightforward moves um the guns i'm trying to think what else is uh there's another be be right Great news. The federal EV rebate is back. Eligible customers get up to $5,000 with the federal EVAP rebate on select 2027 Volt and 2026 Equinox EV models. Visit your local Chevrolet dealer today for more details. The game begins in three, two, one. Ready or not two, here I come. Only in theaters Friday. After surviving one deadly game, Grace and her sister Faith must now face off against four rival families. a fresh round of blood and games filled with more action, scares, laughs, and combustions. Starring Samara Weaving, Catherine Newton, Sarah Michelle Geller, and Elijah Wood. Ready or not, too, here I come. Only in theaters Friday. Get tickets now. Oh, the Oscars are today. Yeah, but, you know, it's probably airing as I released this.

People, yeah, I made a little three about Sinner and, like, Cicter is like, look, people get very upset when you know it like Cinner. It's one of those movies It's a very I don't know I mean Is there anything better this year I mean yeah Oh yeah it's definitely better

But nothing that I care much I mean Marty Supreme It's like whatever it's fucking Why don't they they should just They should read Here's what has to happen With the Oscars They should release

An old movie That didn't get like They should like Movies that got historically snubbed First we make a list of movies That we feel like I got kind of snubbed Michael Clayton

Right Michael Clayton deserved an Oscar didn't get one I think uh what else didn't win a lot Kubrick stuff right bunch of movies that didn't win and we put them out there and we see like every year you get one wild card where it's it's a movie from like 30 years ago and we see as a frame of reference right because this way it kind of gives an incentive I think most people agree that the industry is not as good as it used to be but if you put them hand to head head with these movies from you know like is this really better than than bery linden you make him say it at least you make him acknowledge

is this but really this sinners i don't think it's as good as barry london any of spike lee's movies isn't getting on me like spike lee's way better than bry cougler you're racist all right like spike lee crazy people they just want They just wants to fly. I mean, no one wants anything like, um, they want, they wants is, I'm not saying like no one wants they need is everything needs to make a statement about like they want them to beat you over the head words, is my point. Like it wouldn't be if everyone agreed there they actually wouldn't be.

They want they want something like because in so few people are even shouldn't on it. The fact that people get get worked out about it. It's like that that's the thing that. They want no one likes anything anymore. They just want to get in on something. You know, Chalmay is talking shit about ballet. And it's like,

yes, Chalmy stinks. I mean, look, you won't go on the pod, but yeah, come on. Can we just cut the shit?

But you're fine, but whatever. Yeah, it's like, we're talking about, oh, Shalabit, what are you thinking of it?

Who gives a fuck? But they're always, like, ballet. Like, you don't care about ballet. It's funny. Lucy put on a Barichnikov thing. Britishnikov is amazing

I actually kind of want to see some ballet now I hope other ballet guys are as good as Barishnikov I became a stop about ballet and then we've even seen it before it's not as good for him he's the best right but uh

it is very good now but like whatever point is people just want to fucking get they they just we don't want to live together we don't want to survive we want to burn it all down and let God just sort us out. That's fine.

That looks at civilization has a timeline, an expiration date. I'm not rooting for it to end, but just remember, you can be whatever you want to be. You can be whatever you want to be. You want to be a singer? You want to be a president of the United States. No one can tell you what you can be anything.

Remember kids. No one can tell you that your dreams can't come true. I'm how yeah oh that seemed contrary what but there's war and everyone's dying oh no it's so bad you can be anything just put you just fucking just just just just believe just it doesn't matter just lie you know fucking that's the thing it's all fake now you win you win it's all fake we'll see you in iran