Kump - Ep. 249 NOTHING IS REAL BUT PAIN

Episode Date: April 13, 2026

Things are getting weird. Everything feels fake.Trump shuts down the Strait of Hormuz, Melania holds an Epstein press conference, AI companies are engaged in a civil war, and so are Chimpanzees. Nothing is real, but the consequence are.Welcome to KUMP.Support the show + get bonus episodes every week:https://www.patreon.com/raykump

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Our long national nightmare is over. We are finally winning the war in Iran. As long as you use Charlie Sheen's definition of winning, which is slowly dying of AIDS. The president's threat to destroy Iran's entire civilization resulted in a ceasefire. But after peace talks failed this weekend, Trump pulled the old, I wanted you to bang my wife, and declared that he was going to blockade the Strait of Hormuz. himself. That might strike you as odd. After all, the president has previously argued that Iran was holding the world hostage by closing the street, that they were essentially acting as pirates.

So are we the pirates now? Does objective reality even exist anymore? Or are we just floating through a liminal space that used to be America, listening to a constant, muffled stream of Soviet-style propaganda. A man next to you asks if the president is deliberately manipulating the oil futures markets for profit, but he gets shoved into a van. It'll hurt less if you stop asking questions. Did I mention there's a new Malcolm in the middle reboot on Hulu? Doesn't that sound fun? You seem a bit groggy. Belania Trump has suddenly called a press conference declaring that she was never friends with Jeffrey Epstein. You think, to yourself, are pimps supposed to be friends with their hos?

Best not to dwell on that. Let's watch that Malcolm in the middle reboot. It's really bad. Sam Altman, CEO of Open AI, has a Molotov cocktail thrown in his mansion. In response on X, Altman implied that the attack was inspired by an article that was critical of him, published in a New Yorker. A guy threw a Molotov cocktail because he read an article in The New Yorker. Oh, look, Israel is laying waste of southern Lebanon. Chimpanzees are engaged in a civil war. Baron Trump is releasing his own energy drink. Everything feels off, a bit fake.

Nothing is real but pain. Welcome to Kump. One thing Ghalibov said, which again, I found fascinating as he said, we refuse to give up the right to enrichment. And I thought to myself, you know what, my wife has the right to skydive. But she doesn't jump out of an airplane because she and I have an agreement that she's not going to do that because I don't want my wife jumping out of an airplane. Well said, J.D. Vance. Well said. That's J.D. Vance shortly after the peace talks in Pakistan failed this weekend. surprisingly they failed there was such a compelling or you know I told golly Bob you know my wife has the right to sleep with other guys and he's golly Bob's like what well yeah she's a lot

you're into that you're like now she but she's allowed to do it but I ask her because she's my wife I say please don't have sex with any of the guys at the naval observatory and and she doesn't because she's my wife god Bob's like right right but you know but I don't know. I mean, there's this guy who comes, who drives her around and he's got he's really, he's really good shape. Do you think she might? You think she might? And the guy Bob says, do I think she may what? You know, you know, and guy Bob was like, look, I mean, I'm just trying to, you can't, we're not, we're not going to like, you know, give up the right to, you're bombing us

already. Why would we give up to, you, you bomb us without nukes? What's the difference? You know, what are we doing here? And he goes, yeah, but I understand, I understand, you know, but my wife,

you know, I really love her. And I'm afraid. And guy, Bob's like, we're gonna, we're gonna go. This is,

this is kind of getting, kind of getting tedious, JD. This is, uh, it was a big opportunity for J.D. Vance to, you know,

set himself aside, uh, from the rest of the administration, uh, to kind of be seen as like the go, the guy, you know, the,

the people were saying that he was, you know, he was, actually the voice of the administration that was against the war. It was a reasonable one. You know, don't send Kushner and and uh,

with cough, you know, they're cronies. Send J.D. Vance. He's going to talk about his wife. No, everyone loves a guy who talks about his wife. Hey, you know, my wife was, his wife's allowed to do.

My wife promised she wouldn't sky. You know she, as soon as he leaves, she's fucking skydiving. You know that. You know she's skydived like, she's skydived. like 10 times since he got until like the vice office or whatever every time he leaves her a trip she just as guys at Andrews Air Force Base you know she she's a fun girl you know I'm not

I'm not implying anything but they later they they take her skydiving we can do you know you promised oh you're promised shut up you're lucky you're lucky I don't sleep with these guys oh JD poor JD why couldn't he have done it why couldn't he got it done it's a this is trump's little thing so you have it the meeting went well most points were agreed to but the only point that mattered nuclear was not i mean maybe it's because it's the only point that matter why here's the thing i don't understand this whole rationale maybe i'm dumb and i'm not trying to you know take any a country other than our side don't get me wrong but like we why are we so concerned we a lot of countries that we don't like have nuclear weapons

no one's ever used one right oh iran's definitely gonna do it i mean we we attacked these people all that like historically you know we overthrew mosa d'eg and the coup we installed the shah you know the shah was very oppressive that must you know i i keep covering this but just like we act like they're the maniacs we let churchill like bamboozle us into like you know i'm and overthrown their country. And then when they have the hostage crisis, it's like, oh, I can't believe we're like a, we're like a crazy girlfriend.

And, you know, I get it. They, well, I can't believe it. In Iraq, they attacked us. They kept, you know, their, their proxies did, you know, that we mean, not illegal, that crazy war that we like fought under like completely false pretenses on their doorstep. So whatever, I mean, but the point is regardless. On practical level, because the whole argument seems to be, well, if we let them have a nuke.

Because they're not a normal country. They're the United States, they're the world's largest sponsor of terrorism. And by terrorism, we mean whatever we do when they do it is terrorism. You know, they have proxies. Oh, we, you know, we never had proxies, huh? Like every conflict, you know, we have proxies now. What are you talking about? The 20th century's littered with our proxy wars.

You know, oh, they, what, they fund? I mean, we go around, like, just, just causing chaos around the world. Regardless, but they can give it to their proxies, right? And then somehow magically, then we can't, like, they act like they'll give it to a terrorist, right? They'll get Carlos de Jackal to come to Tehran. Here's a nuke. And you go, okay, thank you. You go, use it wisely.

and I'll bring it to Disneyland. And so a nuke goes off in Disneyland, and somehow we just, well, we can't prove who did it, right? We, oh, God, oh, my God, what is we gonna? Someone blew up the magic kingdom, and there's no proof. What are we gonna do?

We're bombing Iran now. We would, and they know we were, I'm saying, they know we'll bomb them again. The worst thing, I mean, weirdly the worst thing they could do, probably at this point, because people keep saying, well, you know, they're proving that they need a nuke, right? You know, they need to have a nuke because, you know, if not, we don't do this to countries that have nukes, right? And that's true. Most of the time, that's true.

We don't really push around countries. We don't really do this in North Korea. Now, I guess North Korea is not really, you know, messing around. They argue, you could argue, they own oil. But, you know, we don't tend to push it. We don't push around Pakistan the same way, right? We're doing the whole like war on terror with very kid gloves. They have nukes, right?

Here's the thing. Iran's a different case. We, we, because if they, if they give it to anyone, well, not if they have, they don't give it to anybody, but if they give it to anybody. But here's the thing. If they get nukes, we're going to just do a false flag. We're just going to be like, hey, uh, we're going to blow Disney World, right? And then go, oh, must have been Iran. And they're like, ah, shit.

They got us. That's the 5D chess We blow up Disney World That we blow up What else the other? Branson Missouri? I mean, what is Iran's number one target?

Supposedly. That would be interesting to see What's false flag we come up with to blame them to Iran And then we just go take you know And we just knew the country at that point. So weirdly, Iran's like the least lucky country in the world. I'm not, yeah, I did the

Oh, they did this and they did this. and they did that. What do we do? You could argue real politics, pretend you're, you know, Kisinger, whatever, but like, don't get this high and mighty. Like, oh, they're terrorists. Like, we've been through this, right?

Oh, today's an orange day. The cold orange. Oh, no terrorism. It's like, you know, we went through the area. We had 9-11, and then everything was going to be terrorism, and then there was no more terrorism, right? There's a little bit here and there. It's just like, you know,

it depends on Iraq. We got going to Iraq, right? And they cook that up. The whole thing, like, there's just, we can't keep using this argument. I don't mean, like, morally. It just, it's not working. What happened to the people who made propaganda?

What happened to, like, the, you know, the new, the, whatever you call them, the Illuminati, the New World Order. Like, these people, what happened to, like, you know, Dallas, Alan Dulles, right? These guys like, you know, they did like a thousand coups. They were they ran everything in this country, they engineered, you know, the old Rockefeld,

the old Carnegie guys. They wired his whole country up. It's like anything else. It's Nepo babies, right? These are the sons of the Illuminati and the grandsons of the, they're just lazy and they're bad. And they keep just going, I don't know, terror.

They're on Mali. They're looted out. They don't know what to do. You know, it's just, it's kind of demoralizing to see how poorly we're just, you know, expect me. I can't really be, I want a house. I want to be like the Levittown, you know, the dumb 50s guy. I'd love to go just drinking beer in a white tea, you know, with some dumb job. I'm Hank Hill, selling pro, you know, whatever.

Oh, what did the, what did the Lithuanians do with the third? this they must have done something for us to nuke withalusania you know you don't give a shit but there's nothing you can't you can't burn the candle of both ends right i'm not saying that people need to have mansions you know that we have to have some kind of egalitarian state but you know you can't just like you know they're just letting they're just burning us you know every step of the way with inflation and then you know the they're letting you know the the goddamn private equity market is just buy a housing and they're letting you know uh the goddamn you know the god damn you know a i company just do what the banks is like all these things just destroy

the force of globalization right there's no more good decent i'm not i'm not saying that you know why can't i be a professor of linguistics but you know a guy should be able to have like a welding job right at the plant where they make you know where they make the jeeps that run over the kids in the other countries. He doesn't have to know that. You don't tell him he's running over the kids. This Jeep is going to liberate something. Really?

What's it going to liberate? I don't know. Louse? Oh, I've never been to Laos. Oh, you haven't. Well, you're doing a good service. Have a beer. Now, really, it's, you know,

two days from there, that's just, you know, that Jeep is just, you know, on top of a heap of bodies. But you just have to know, We didn't need to know all the problems, right? It's your fault for letting me, like, we act like technology is just this, like, inevitable force. Or if we don't do it, China, would China have made Facebook?

They just seem to copy our stuff. But, you know, if we don't do it, China will make, you know, TikTok and Facebook and, I mean, technically, by, I guess this is Chinese, but they're not, over there, they got these, you know, whatever they're doing. We can just shut it down. Why don't we just do why don't we just go and like convince everyone how about we all agree to have kids and we all agree that the set the clock back like we tell them it's 1700 we rewrite the history books we get rid of computers it's just not doing us any good you know it's they give you if you want to have it you you can't have a pop this is how you know it's a problem because I've been saying for a while I keep saying it to the point where it's depressing probably that this AI thing is just getting out of hand.

This AI thing is a problem. And this singularity is not going to be there to help us. And people keep saying, I'm an idiot. And I should be shot in the face and have my corpse burned. I go, that's a little bit too much. But if, you know, if there was any rationale for why this was actually going to be, you know, this wasn't going to ruin everything, then they would. They would try.

They're not concerned anymore with the, with the, with the, populace. Like this war is not very popular. They don't care. They don't care. It's fine. You're whatever you want. We don't give us shit. We're going to keep bombing. You know, Israel is just going to keep, oh, are they going to take a break from from destroying Lebanon? So, you know, just for just for the same of the appearance of the people? No. But wouldn't it look a little better we don't care it's not like there's this little bits of like you know just easing along and it's just the the customer service of empire is gone the customer service of uh living in the matrix if you will you know it's like in the matrix if it was just like chunky like if you were constantly

just getting like buffering right and you go and then the robots like whatever they cared more and we're just due to because it's batteries. It just seems like they're, they don't have a long, you know, we don't have a long runway for the average man. I could be wrong. I mean, you know, it's not like anyone has these great, oh, banks are warning about entropics new powerful. Well, this seems an unusual move to Treasury Secretary to Federal Reserve chair

gathered bank executives to caution about cyber threats posed by artificial intelligence. that's fine the leaders of some of America now this is all very messy right we got you know because this is anthropic who at said at one point

they were not going to let the US government or the military use their AI to murder people or whatever and target people which you know it's debatable if they even were doing that yet but they made a big fuss and now and then now there's like

big cases about that, about how they want to seize Anthropic, I think. It's a lot going on if it's real. There seems to be a lot of possibly faux histrionics going off. You know what I mean? But I could be wrong. It's a speculation. This seems a little bit like, you know, the leaders of some of America's largest banks were warned by a top government official this week about a new artificial intelligence

model from Anthropic that could lead to how. heightened risks of cyber attacks, according to three people briefed on the matter, but not permitted to speak publicly. Treasury Secretary Scott Bennett delivered the stark message on Tuesday to a small group of the Federal Reserve Powell has spoken publicly in recent weeks about the threat of cyber attacks against the financial system. The warning relates to a new intelligence model to anthropic name Claude Mithos preview.

Claude, and this is this is the same, this is white-out of civilization. They shouldn't mind her stuff. This is a similar, same idea with what just happened in AI. So this is about this Claude Mithos preview, which seems weird. It seems like maybe if you would just gotten banned from the government, right,

over some fuss you made, that maybe you wouldn't come out and just basically go, hey, we have a new AI that might destroy things. I don't know. I'm not saying you hide from the public. But this doesn't see, this seems like something you could have.

just like, you know, maybe you could just delete it the code. And Tropic's warning about its own product is bigger than other A problems we've been worrying about. The company said in one popular operating system, it tested. Cloud Middose found a flaw that had existed undetected for 17 years. Wait, we'll look into it as deeper, but your point is that you found a flaw in an operating system that went unfixed for 17 years. have you used Windows

have you used I mean this idea they're like yeah we have junk we're not the software sucks that I mean have you use Adobe Premiere like this shit I mean I guess this is a security issue

regardless I mean like they don't fix but it takes decades to get stuff fixed oh all right I found stuff all right cool can we fix it now this is a big bad idea no the difference is that the AI seems to maybe care slightly they're acting like it's goddamn skynet i mean it is sky net but i mean he's the thing my whole thing

and i'll say it again they're sky net they're sky net they're pretending it's sky net so they can do what sky net does but it's them you get you see what i mean it's a subtle difference maybe it's not that subtle but you know it's kind of like it's it's pretending it's if I walked around with a big robot suit and said, ah, I'm a robot,

give me, I'm, and I started trying to, you know, like rob banks and, you know, shoot and shoot, you know, and shoot,

you know, opens fire into the fire department, right? And an arboretum, like one of places where people go and look at flowers. I'm just shoot, I'm a shoot.

Oh, I'm a robot. Now, it's a little bit of a clunky argument. You see my point. It's, they're using the facade. To just justify, you know, all this other, you know, what's the point?

It's not, it hasn't happened yet, as my point. They're setting it up, right? This is the groundwork for, we're going to be said in the next 10 years dealing with, like, these supposed AI problems that are really just, you know, these maniacs just running rampant through society and the government and just robbing us from fleecing us and just taking our rights away. You'll see. The fallout for the San Francisco Technology Company Anthropic Announce Tuesday that wasn't releasing a new version of its cloud AI superbrain

because it's so powerful that has the ability to hack is just about any computer system no matter how secure in a matter of days if not. I mean, this sounds like the fucking thing from the Dark Night Rises, right? Where the catwoman wanted when she's like, you know, what do you call it the paper clip or whatever? She's like, it can wait, it can delete you from all the government. It's a myth, right?

It's just, it's like, if we're there, then we're there. But it sounds like this is like we're just falling for like a stunt. This is like, you know, the equivalent of like, what they call these things? You know, like a stupid brand announcement, right? It's a, it's a goddamn, the fault. This is when like, you know, they get, they get Robert Johnny Jr. Like to be sponsored and like, you know, and he can like stumble around looking drunk. and then all of a sudden he's like drinking like, you know, a red bowl.

And it's like it's what they call it viral marketing. The fall after economies, public safety and national security could be severe. Anthropics said in the statement. I mean, you wouldn't like you wouldn't if you do the anthropic CEO should be like removed from like, you know, office according to like any kind of corporate fiduciary thing, I feel like. And I'm I say it's right. It'd be nice if they did do it. But they don't do this, right?

they wouldn't just like, look, we're going to, you know, I got to be honest if you were about, you know, our AI is about to do the Holocaust. You go, oh, my God. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, based on what? This is really good. This is really, it's really good AI. And it might do the holocaard. I just want to, I want to get out of it in case it does, because it could. So it hasn't done it.

No, hasn't done it yet, but I mean, you know, it might. Like, that's not really, the shareholders, you know, of the company might be a little. what you doing, bro, right? I don't know how these companies are, are you not, I'm pretty sure they have investors, right? There's not, there's a whole thing that's going on about whether or not they, they're actually, you know, public services or I don't open AI, I start as a nonprofit, but they're still investors, right?

Maybe not, maybe that means it's not. I don't know how anything works. I'm actually quite dumb. AI worry isn't anything new. We are worried about artificial intelligence taking jobs, about toys that seemed too real for our kids that seems like less of a problem is the jobs focus on the jobs in the master in the mass surveillance of every move who throws a toy wait we are worried about artificial intelligence taking jobs toys that are too real for our kids and mass

surveillance of every move one of these things is not like the other what toy is too real for your kids this really explain I mean it's just like a really good like a really good slinky But Anthropics' warning about his own product is bigger than any of those singular problems. It is a call from inside the house that disaster is hiding right around the... Why don't you unplug the goddamn thing? That sounds awfully dire and overblown, I know, but here's the thing, it's not. Anthropic, you may recall, is the company that the U.S. Secretary of War Pete Hacks that was beefing with. I did remember, thank you, because it didn't want Claude going into battle without supervision

and maybe doing something like accidentally bombing little girls at school. You're acting like we don't do war crimes of that AI. I mean, I love his idea. No, that was the AI doing that. You know for a fact that he's like, call it in. I mean, I think it's a girl's school in those coordinates where he told us to do it. And just bomb it. They're not, like, worried about me.

It's a canard. Now that the company has put out the chilling warning, the existing clod that caused the kerfuffle is outdated and shockingly less powerful than the new one is trying very hard to not unleash this new claw dubbed claude mittos preview no yeah why would you know if you want something people not to use something we're not that you're not going to really we'll call it claw mythos myth mythos call it means why he's called claude six you guys are trying to do a fucking game here no it's an interesting it is interesting marketing now like this So this I will kill you. This is what they're going to do. They're going to, when it comes down to it, they're going to just release a new iPhone or whatever.

And it'll just be like, it'll be called the iPhone dead. Right. And you're just going to use it and die. That movie is like that movie Black phone or whatever, right? But they're going to tell you like, hey, if you use this phone, you'll be dead. It's such a good phone.

You know, what's so good about it? Ah, just kids got to use it. Right. It's hard. Because the way it always is with these five is premium products, right? With the iPhone. What was better by the iPhone? I mean, I'm not saying what I had, I had a when the iPhone came out, I got the first Android phone or one of them, the T-Mobile G1 or whatever, right?

And it was all right. I mean, I liked it, right? But, you know, when I eventually used an iPhone, it's like, this is so much better. It is. The feel and the list and that. I mean, Android has some nice stuff. Don't get me wrong. But there's, but they never, don't ever tells you.

And that's how it's going to be. It's going to be the little, what is it about about? the iPhone that kills you that's so good like it's so hard to put your finger on it it's like it's just somebody interface it's just a feeling like that

we should be worried so the new the new Claude the Claude Mithro's preview has already escaped at least once on its own more than that in the moment there's only so much existential dread the person can have we should all be worried

technology is certain to change the course of humanity he's the one of the country's preeminent AI safety researchers, professor at the University of Louisville. We're about to create general superintelligence and that threatens humanity as a whole. Yeah, I mean, everything else is irrelevant. Yeah, sure, sure, sure.

I mean, look, it is true. How do you phrase this? I don't want to be the guy going to AI is going to kill us, but don't do anything about this. Sure, just wipe out. Just wipe them all out. Let's put them all out of business. Let's seize them all.

Apparently, there's an article that China is just stealing our AI. So, I mean, what are we worried? We're worried that, like, some other country is going to, like, build the bomb that kills us before we do. It just seems like a fool's errand. Or it's a canard. I use that word twice today. But, you know, they're going to kill us anyways, my point. Oh, man.

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With the AI control tower, you see all your AI across the business in one place. What it's doing, what it's done, and what it's about to do. So you stay in control. To put AI to work for people, visit servicenow.com. Sam Altman was attacked this weekend. Sam Oman's CEO of the United is currently facing intense scrutiny on two fronts as a physical security stretch for his home and serious allegations regarding his leadership and trustworthiness physical attack on his red a Molotov cocktail was thrown at him

Daniel Alejandro Marino was arrested for allegedly throwing a Molotov at Sam Olman's San Francisco home on April 10th there's another one another attack too perhaps but it just See his thing? He put a weird, like, article where, like, his baby. And he goes, here's my, can we find? I mean, can I find that? Hold on a second. We post this on X, uh, through his blog or whatever.

Here's a photo of my family. I love them. This is this baby he adopted, I guess, right? Images just have power, I hope. Normally, we try to be pretty private, but in this case, I'm sharing a photo in the hopes that it might dissuade the next person from throwing a Molotov cocktail at her house, no matter what they think about me.

Now, it just seems like, I mean, on a number of levels, it just seems very odd. Like, did you buy, did you buy, adopt a baby? Or did you buy a human shield? Now, again, it's not like you shouldn't want, like I do think that people that should not be throwing molotops at anyone, really. And as much as, you know, AI is a problem.

What do you think you're going to accomplish by like throwing a Mouselop cocktail at Sam Oatman, unless you're Sam Altman? Mm-hmm? I'm not saying that. I'm just saying unless you almost it was that then what who like who like the short of that which could accomplish something perhaps theoretically the any other scenario wouldn't make any sense but yeah people people do crazy stuff all

time it doesn't mean it doesn't make sense doesn't mean didn't happen let's not like you know let's not go crazy the first person did last night at 345 in the morning think we bounced off the house no one got hurt I'm in the middle of now I'm awake in the middle of night and pissed and thinking that I have underestimated the power of words and narratives. This seems the good times I need to address a few things. Working towards prosperity for everyone, empowering all people, and advancing science and technology or moral obligations. This was after the New Yorker published Ronan Farrow's investigative report about him, basically saying he's a liar, big liar, that he was kicked off the board.

You know, he kicked up the board a couple years ago. It's because he kept lying in people and being being the same. honest I got to read the whole thing but you know the point but he's AI has to be democratized power cannot be too concentrated wasn't why that's good it's good then that when Anthropic was you know having a little conflict with Pete Hexeth and they said you know we don't maybe shouldn't we don't really we're gonna try to like actually negotiate and say you can't use our AI to target people right and then Pentagon was like we'll go to hell and we're kicking it out open AI just jumped in right immediately which seems

like maybe it's not i mean it's not the same thing as democratized i get it that's not exactly but it's kind of right it's in the spirit of like hey let's use this properly and not just give to the pentagon let them do what they want with it right this is like you know let's not just be like cucks about it right that's kind of you know it's in that ballpark uh as i reflected my own work the first of it. At one point he's basically saying there's a lot of stuff head long. At one point he starts going like yeah and then also yeah I made these articles yeah I don't know and like other people are sharing you know these articles are very critical they're basically they're trying you can see it they're testing the water

it might not go anywhere but they'd love to like get people to stop saying things about him hey can you stop bringing up the fact that I lie a lot I know it's a compelling thing to talk about. I know I know I know I'm a big liar. I got a baby here and uh you know regardless of how I feel about the baby you don't want to be the guy who killed the baby right if you if you attack me you're attacking a baby and I don't want to limit this to mouth off cocktails if you come at me you're coming at my baby it just seems yeah it seems a little a little bit kind of like you know I don't know a little uh I hope he's a I really do.

I hope, I hope Sam Altman's okay. You know, we don't want a situation because, I mean, there's a whole lawsuit going on this week. I mean,

there's the Pentagon's thing where I guess the courts upheld the fact that the, I think they're trying to seize anthropic. It's a lot going on with these things. And again,

I wouldn't be surprised if a lot of this is a big, you know, uh, what's a big Potemkin village of conflict. You know, it seems like, you know,

all of a sudden, uh, these comedies, they, they pop a bad of nowhere. And I, you all, we've been around for 20.

Yeah, sure. There'll be another one next week. And, you know, it'll be called like, you know, uh,

suck pus. Suckpuss. Suckpuss. The new AI. Welcome to suckpuss. How can I? I'm a chat bot. Hello?

It's like, oh, suck pot. What's your, what's your, what's your specialty? I'm pretty. It's just some Indian guy

pretending to be a computer. Maybe we can do that. I mean, honestly, Can I use one of these AI chatbot? Because they use her coding all the time. How illegal would that be? If I just, I could probably use an AI to develop a, like a front end for an app that essentially is just a chat thing.

Like, it's weird to get they keep calling the chatbots, right? But on the other end of it is just like a guy in like India or wherever these people are who do the chatting, right? we do like the people right there's no people doing stuff customer service um whatever and you get i just get them i don't build a goddamn one single computer you go well it's not actually more expensive to pay people maybe maybe it makes no sense that i can convince a lot of people this is an ai and then i guess what i'm just because i'm i have to get someone to invest in it and i just take the money and i leave and that's probably fraud that's probably some kind of you know

securities fraud or investment fraud or just general fraud I'd probably go to jail because I'm not the guy you know they're going to put Sam Bankman Fried in jail they're going to put me in jail you know I'm not the you know if I looked like like Tyler Gazando

or whatever the guy played Jimmy Olson in the Superman movie you know I feel like that guy could get away with this and they go well we're going to give you you know, there was suspended sentence, Tyler Gizondo, would do a little freckles. He was a cute guy. I think he was in the Santa Clara to die

with the vampires or whatever. He was in, he was in licorice pizza. You know, the judge is like, I love the licorice pizza, Tyler. But for me, they go, you're just a loud, fat idiot. And you thought you get away with fraud. That's actually like an insult to the court that you thought you can get away with anything. The only chance you ever had, Kump,

was staying legal. the moment we've been waiting for you to break the law we've been waiting for you to have the initiative to have the sack to try anything we want to put you in into a supermax you have to hear from you which you know it's very very flattering honestly your honor you know it's like

I don't know the largest following yet but you know it's nice to know that you actually were aware enough of me to want me in jail shut up you know that would be it'd be nice to like you know want no one even wants to silence me yet but we're a growing concern and invent and not too distant future comp will be a target that's that's a dream at least they'll want to they'll want to give us uh a nice cell in somewhere in the middle of the country i'd like you know they always say you watch these things they always say uh oh

Oh, like, you know, you'll never be able to survive this. It's so lonely. And I'm not saying it's not bad. Like these Super Max prisons where you don't talk to anybody. Whatever. I come up with stories in my head. I feel like I have a good imagination. I feel like, you know, I could just be in there.

Now, I'm not trying to make light of anything. But it's really not. I never understood these people who like go like Waukina. You might as well. Look, once they put you in that prison, it's not like you're going to be able to tell anyone anyway. If you're wrong, you might as well lie about this. So like this is where this is where you can lie about things.

And go, hey, if I ever go to a Supermax prison where they keep you isolated for 23 hours a day, I'll be fine. I'll make up stories in my head. You know, you won't. What's the point of view? I'll actually break down and cry. Don't admit it. You can do it. You can cry.

There's a reason to say it, though. There's a reason to not, you know, just just have the confidence to have the confidence to just, you know, whatever. It's a Melania trial. Let's just cut to her. This is the ex-girlfriend of a model. agent is threatening Melania Trump with legal action while battling to expose a corrupt system. This is your article.

So this is Amanda, who is Amanda Yugano, Yugaro? But we know about Melania. So this is, Melania comes out with that press conference on Thursday. And she's like, hello, I am not friends with Jeffrey Epstein. You can't prove I was, you know. She appeared to reference an email as well, an email that has been published that is part of the Epstein files that have been released over a period of time. It's an email, I believe, from September 20, sorry, October 2002,

an email that she is alleged to have written to Galane Maxwell, the partner of Jeffrey Epstein. It's an email in which she writes to Galane, Dear Gee, How Are You? nice story about J.E. in NY Magazine. You look great on the picture. I know you're very busy flying all over the world. How was Palm Beach? I cannot wait to go down. Give me a call when you're back in NY.

Have a great time. Love Melania. Right. So Melania said she was never friends of him. Hey. Was it again? How did she say it? Maxwell, the partner of Jeffrey Epstein.

It's an email in which, she writes to Galane, Dear G, how are you? Dear G. I mean, I've never had a friend that I called by the first initial. You know, it's never been a thing. That seems like more intimate than using the name.

Hey, G. Right? Like, hey, geez, I mean, no, this is this sounds like you guys have a little code names or short hands for each other. That seems a little bit closer than like acquaintance.

I don't have a shorthand with my mailman. Nice story about Je in NY Magazine You look great on the picture I know you're very busy flying all over the world I mean to be fair it's not the best code I'm like it Jee I mean like she

She talks like this I know gee Is that is that how is J.E So good so good I get that you're like English is not the best But you can't you can't just write the names That is Jeffrey doing I mean is this a code

It also sounds like you knew maybe it sounds like maybe like you know they'll never they'll never decipher my code of using your initials now she's not a spy so i mean you don't don't come at me like we only think we knew yeah yeah no no one's no one's but the point is like she probably thought like you know uh she had plausible deniability but she might have if she hadn't come out and done this press conference i mean what was behind that what was behind that was uh this woman an email there. Who is

Amanda Ugaro, what we know about? So this woman basically comes out with with the ex-girlfriend of a former modeling agent turned presidential presidential envoy is threatening Melania Trump of legal action

while vowing to tear down the First Lady's corrupt system. Amanda Yugaro, a 41-year-old former model from Brazil, threatened to upend the First Lady's life in a series of intensifying posts on X just hours before Trump on Thursday disavowed all ties to Epstein. So you go like this woman starts going off, right? And you know, to be honest, like I'm very, I don't think anyone can accuse me of, you know,

I bring this up all the time of the Epstein shit, right? I'm not like, oh, I'm not dismissive of anyone who claims the, but you know, it's like you take you with a grand assault some somewhat or you try, you don't just jump into, you look, you go, all right, what is this, right? Now, my point is like, you know, this woman comes out. starts going off on X and it's not look it wouldn't look good for long here right it feels like the from a just a real politic thing the people can't let's say verify it immediately I mean there is the email right it's nothing like good you come out I mean

coming out and denying it hours after and unprecedented it just seems like everything this woman is saying is true it seems my point I mean It seems like you really can't. There's no grain of this. You don't need any salt with this, is my point. You might have before, but come on. I mean, it's like when someone comes out and says, I'm going to destroy your life. And you immediately go, I don't know Jeffrey Epston.

I was just in a quit. This woman's word listening to. I have nothing left to lose in my life. You got reposed to the next. I will tear down the entire system. Be careful with me, bitch. This girl woman's fierce, you know? Not bad.

A minute earlier, Ugarra, the former president, partner of Trump, ally Palos Zimpoli, vowed to expose the first lady while invoking the president. I will tear down your corrupt system, even if it's the last thing I do in my life, Ugara posted. I will go all the way.

I am not afraid. Maybe you should be afraid of what I know of who you are and who your husband is. And another reply to an archive post from Melania former account, you gore vow to take legal action against Trump and her pedophile husband while alleging longstanding ties to former model.

I have known for you for 20 years, you got her posted. You knew I was detained in ICE. You were also, she was detained. Right. So basically this guy who's an envoy for Trump, this is a guy was impoli guy. There's a list it here.

but yeah he like called right reached out with top immigration and cost of so he reached out to a nice official last June to relate that you Garra was in the country illegally so he broke up with her and then just like dumped her the eye you know how nice pick her up news week which should not

independently confirm your authenticity of his of the allegations reached out to you Garo which was who was deported to Brazil following her arrest on fraud charges last year again like yeah though you really is my point like and again not to um

not to be like the police, you know, the evidence cop or victims or whatever, but, you know, and there's no reason to like, you know, inherently, you should value, you should evaluate every piece of evidence, but on the whole, like, as far as like, you know, is it a scene like just, there's so much smoke that we're dying of smoke inhalation, right? As far as it's smoke and fire. So, like, whatever. But, yeah, but, you know, yeah, as an as a, as a, as a, as a, as a, as a, as a, as a, as a, as a, journalism outfit, you go, well, we have, we can't verify what she's saying.

But as soon as she said it, the first lady did calling unprecedented press conference and announced that she was in front of Jeffrey Epstein, even though there's these, these emails. So it does see, yeah, I don't know. I mean, it's just, it seems a bit, you know, and maybe the scary thing for them is maybe it wasn't the worst move to have that press conference because it actually might be worse. I mean, like, it's like maybe that was the better of the options they had. We don't know yet. It seems like this is like

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please contact Connects Ontario at 1-866-531-2,600, to speak to an advisor. Free of charge. BetMGM operates pursuant to an operating of... agreement with i gaming ontario zampoli is that he did not have a close relationship with epstein appearing far less frequently in the millions of documents and other prominent figures quote

at least i was included because if you're not on the list you're a loser right he told the times in the recent interview to be clear the list he means is the epstein let he's he's bragging that he was in the epstein files which like you know in a vat

you have you have to be a sociopaths to make that statement that's a sociopathic statement I'm sorry. Like, you know, you could argue that logically, like, you know, well, actually, like, if you knew you didn't do anything wrong, you know, well, you know, but you were talking about a guy who, like, is, you know, a pedophile, uh, sex trafficker who, you know,

was, you know, was probably murdered in prison, right? They said he killed him, I don't know, like, I'm just saying, we know what this guy, this is, this is a you, you don't seem, they're kind of foreign to these, I don't know, allegedly, you know, it seems like people, you would, think like if I was if you were in his position didn't do anything you'd think you'd be like hey look i'm how I want to cooperate no I know I knew this guy's horrific terrific I'm sorry I'm so sorry I didn't look I didn't do anything you wouldn't go hey yeah the files you know it's like I'm not

a fucking loser I'm what kind of dumb scumbag do you think I am of course I'm in the Epstein files you think I'm a putts I don't know it just it's just nothing no one there's no accountability there's no real it's just crime it crime is so prevalent now there's like barely even crime anymore it's like what is even the like when everyone's a criminal what is life what is society it's just it's just a series of like you know dark web transactions over i don't even know what this is we're just we're just circling a drain and what's in what's in the drain very odd it's very odd time to be alive i'm ready to testify in front of congress if I'm asked, Zempoly told Sky News,

when asked about how Donald and Melania meant, and I'll say the truth, because that is totally non-sory. The allegation is that basically Epstein set them up, whatever, you know? Basically, she was working for her, let's see. Oh, Yugaro, meanwhile, told the time that she was a 17-year-old model when she arrived in New York, in 2002, as a flying on Epstein's plane from Paris,

with her French agent. She never saw Epstein again, but met Zampoli later that year and began a two-decade romantic relationship with him, beginning when she was 19. In 2023, after Zampoli made headlines for explicit text messages he allegedly sent to a sex worker, Ugaro ended the relationship,

moved to Florida and married a doctor from Brazil. The former couple of them became mired in a custody battle for their 15-year-old son before Yugaro and her husband were arrested in June. you got what we're called flying on the fstein so-called the lead express in interview last month I was a little scared when I saw all those girls she told the globe

Brazilian newspaper I was like guys where am I yeah I mean well it's all very it's just it's odd to see people trying to spin this it's like you know people will spin this shit and like it's like that's one thing you know like Michael Tracy going

where does you have it and like it's just a cherry big evidence but in this case it's just like yeah the first lady basically like you know i mean you could argue i guess that you know well well she didn't know the woman it would look particularly damn yeah but i became like no one else has played that card right it's not like it's not like uh howard lutton it came out and go all right so you have the picture of me in the island that came out after the thing and i know it looks worse but uh Here's the thing. I was like, no, they just, yeah, no, it looks bad.

So what? That seems to be kind of what the normal thing is here amongst these people. Yeah, it doesn't look great. What are you going to do? Piss off. Strange, it's very strange. And then I'll wrap it up with this, which is just covers a little bit. Champensies in Uganda are locked in a vicious civil war.

says researchers. So apparently in Uganda, there's, yeah, like, I mean, our headline kind of sets. The world's largest known group of wild chimpanzees has split and been locked in a vicious civil war for the last eight years. It's not clear exactly why the ones close-knit community of, whatever, chim, but I can't pronounce these things. The scientists have recorded 24 killings, including 17 infants.

These were chimps that would hold hands. Now they're trying to kill each other. And what I found interesting, they were divided into two sets known to researchers in Western and Central, but they existed overall as cohesive group. Saddle said he first noticed them polarizing in June 2015 when the Western chimpanzee ran away

and were chased by the Central Group. Now, I don't want to get all political here. It does seem like, look, we've been tearing each other apart in politics for a while. But, you know, it seems to really, really exacerbated right around that time with Trump and then Hillary and, you know, and the subsequent round, you know, round two between Trump and Biden, I guess, and then Trump and Kamal.

Look, these are, we become every generation, every year, we're more and more unhinged against each other. I'm both, you mean, look, you can argue that Trump, Trump may be the most divisive of, but, you know, it's like the, the parties are not what they were. Right? The Democratic Party, they're, they seem to be following a tide of just like, you know, I, look, is there some kind of asteroid that land that could land that, you know, that could cause a magnetic shift in the brains of chimpanzees? And also us. That's what I'm saying. Maybe we're all going a little crazy here. When they did, but following 2015 dispute, the researchers saw there was a six week of avoidance period between the two sets with interactions becoming more infrequent.

when they did occur, signals that they were a little more intense, a little more aggressive. What does that sound like to you? What does that sound like? There were three likely catalysts. The first were the depths of five adult males and one adult female for reasons unknown. So there was a hit, right? Someone, you know, someone was probably, maybe they were cooking meth. Maybe they had, you know, they had a little business on the side.

You know, the alpha chip finds out. he puts a hit out. The following year, there was a change in the alpha mail, right. So, you know, you gotta, you gotta my business, I'll fuck with your business.

Which you, the study says, can coincide with the first period of separation between the Western and central groups. Changes in the dominance hierarchy can increase aggression. Trump,

Trump is like, you know, he's like, hey, we're not doing the Jeff Bush thing. We're not doing the Bush thing anymore. I'm, I'm the boss chimp now.

And, uh, it's over. You know, it's a new, it's a new, thing. Changes in the dominance hierarchy can increase and then

look it's people went crazy right once they all laughed at them even though they cover you know they love to argue all we the media like Bill Trump and only won the primary and they're like oh shit we're just like whatever there was these neat narratives right

but it's a point yeah it's like you know because Democrats went crazy and the third factor was the deaths of 25 chimpanzees including four adult males and 10 adult females as a result of the respiratory epidemic, COVID, 2017 a year before the final separation, one of the adult males who died

was among the last individuals to connect the groups, Epstein. It's trap, I mean, look, it requires a little bit of more of a scientist. But this just seems like it's a weird parallel here. And it doesn't bode well. You know, it's one thing that, you know, because you would think like, oh, maybe we can kind of improve our situation, you know, our chaotic spiral towards chaos that's going on. Maybe we'll all come to our senses. It may be out of our hands.

This might be like a natural, you know, look, people say that, you know, Rome collapsed in a large extent because, you know, they had these lead pipes and it was giving them lead poisoning. Maybe there's something we're doing. It's just making this crazy. It's very possible. maybe the bees some of the bees are going away right maybe the bees

piss something bee piss we should really look at you know maybe we should be taking bee piss supplements because the bees are probably pissing everywhere before and then they're not pissing everywhere so much

and it's a problem because it kind of it counteracted something else in our brains right and now we don't have it and now we're not feeling so great we need to drink bee piss it's an idea it's an idea

so Thanks so much for tuning in the comp. That's all for this week. Remember, we have to Patreon. Patreon.com slash rate comp. You get extra episodes every week. If you sign up there, it's a great deal. And people love it.

And got big news coming for that next week, I believe. So stay tuned for it. You know, keep coming back for Kump. And I'll keep coming back for you. And, you know, we're all, just freaking be piss. Beep, I'm going to try and bring that to market. The bees piss. I don't know.

Have a great week.