Kump - Ep. 267 PRINCE HARRY’S COUP D’ÉTAT

Episode Date: August 24, 2026

https://www.patreon.com/raykump Support the show + get bonus episodes every week.Prince Harry and Meghan Markle are returning to Britain after six years in California, and Ray analyzes the possibility that Harry is secretly planning a coup to seize the throne.

Two and five Canadians will hear the words you have cancer. That's why every step and dollar raised matters. On September 19th, join thousands in Toronto for the Princess Margaret Cancer Foundation Walk. Challenge yourself, friends, and family to walk 21 kilometers in support of life-saving research. Together, we can carry the fire and help create a world free from the fear of cancer. Register today at pmcfwalk.ca.ca. Prince Harry of England is returning to the United Kingdom after six years of winging and flexing his private security around Montecito, California, with his actress wife, Megan Markle from the hit show Burn Notice. They're saying they want to raise their kids in Britain, but I'll let you in on a little secret.

I had dinner this week with a very fat British guy who I won't name, and he said that Harry bungled the whole Epstein thing. You see, me and this scumbag were eating mushy peas and mold vinegar when he told me that Harry was sent by the dead Queen Elizabeth to be a sort of clandestine goodwill ambassador to try and take attention away from Prince Andrews Epstein connections. That's why Charles kept asking if the kids would be black. It was a cover story. But it turns out, people ended up preferring Jeffrey Epstein to Harry and Megan.

so the whole operation is tits up and you're going back to England. Then me and my fat friend started stuffing our faces with pheasant pie and figgy ale. And he started crying about how his wife left him because he lost all her family's money betting on a sailing regatta. And Prince William might have a terminal illness, he said. Harry wants to weasel his way back in as King Regent. And I was like, isn't King Charles still the king? But then he shit his pants and fell through the chair.

So the future of Britain seems murky at best. Welcome to the end of empire. Welcome to Kump. What to know about Harry and Megan's return to Britain. The couple are moving back after six years in the United States. What will they do? And much else are still unclear. You know, it's, uh, it's been, it's been a long time coming.

These, these two came to here, the America was inexplicable. and people wonder, you know, he kept saying, my children are being attacked. He kept alluding to the idea that, you know, he lived in some kind of Shakespearean drama where, you know, him and his burn-noticed wife are basically, you know, living a step ahead of assassins. You know, New York City.

Remember that whole episode of New York City when they were driving around on the Hudson Parkway? Over the night day? the West Side Highway, a full-speed chase with nobody chasing them. These are people who are trying to create a modern-day Shakespearean drama. And I get it. I like it. I respect the hustle of trying to pivot.

The British Empire's sorted connections to, you know, Jeffrey Epstein. alleged drug trades and all sorts of, you know, and just a messy business of empire. And, you know, didn't his uncle try to do a coup? Wasn't his mother assassinated? Didn't he used to whine about his mom being assassinated all the time? I miss that Harry. What happened to conspiracy Harry?

What happened to the Harry? He was like, you know, I think there's a people in this government who try to kill my mom, who killed my mom. I'm going to get to the bottom of it. And then they dangle some chick from, Byr notice and he just he doesn't give a shit anymore. You know, what, why he should be making documentaries about Doty I Fiat or whoever these people are, you know, about the Israeli thing, the Mossad do it?

Who knows? You know, the tabloids, he just lost, they lost a big case against the tabloids. I mean, that's the problem. This guy's messy. You know, like, I get it. You know, people claim that Diana, they were taking upskirts of, Diana when uh what you know after the after her fatal car crash i remember where i was when his mom died you know rest in peace i'm not trying to be an exploitive person when prince yeah but

she was she was a princess of england you know it's a public figure i can talk about it i'm not being trashy i'm just saying i was listening to techno on the radio there was a techno program on w i need w i think back in in you know at the time and the 1997 i think it was liquid Todd was on the radio and he was playing like, you know, junkie X-L before they were big in America. And he broke in and goes, oh, oh, the queen is dead. When that the queen, he probably said the queen. He was, you know, who knows what was going on that radio station?

Oh, hopped up. Oh, oh, the queen. Oh, Harry, oh, Prince Harry. No, but Diana. I mean, what was she at that point? Lady Diana, they divorced. You can't, you, you, the, the, the, royal family's like the mafia you can't just leave it you can't just say i'm going to divorce it i'm not

saying that she ended up to blame but my point is but i didn't know at the time you know i was a young guy i didn't realize at the time that they were that while she was still squirming in the tunnel these monsters and the tabloids were taking upskirts of her but they're not the ones who killed her right i mean that's that's but harry seems to think so whatever my point is you know this is why you lost everyone because he went around talking about polo and talking about you know like and you're trying to get your wife back on Netflix with it with a whether whether where it was big you know here I mean I watched an episode of it she was making a candle I learned how to make a candle it's not that hard to make a candle you know everyone's going she's doing what mother Stewart did well I never watched

marter Stewart because I wasn't that wasn't I wasn't at that place in my life when martha Stewart was you know before she went to prison for tax evasion or or murder whatever she went to isn't four so Megan marco I was watching I could you know I could I could fuck with this I can I could do I can make honey I think she was she had a friend who was a beekeeper I don't think you know were they actually friends with the beekeeper did they talk to the beekeeper apparently the people in Montecito see you know if you're heard of San Barbara Montecito is like the rich part of Minnesota Barbara's where rich very rich people live Oprah uh Orlando Bloom drew Baramore

just the creme de creme all right so you know and that's where they they they stationed themselves um and even amongst those standards their security was seen as a bit much let's see i think we have an article here about queen cam no queen camilla what happened to harry and megan here we go harry and megan's california neighbors shrug is their ideal ideal i never you know i didn't know this word until today. I know idyllic, obviously, but I never heard of it as the singular idol ideal. How do you say that their

is IDYLLL? Jack Jekyll Island. Prince Harry and Megan Merkel self-exile to the ultra wealthy on enclave of Montecito in 2020. I've been there. It smells like Jasmine. It's lovely. Really nice. They wave,

they drive, they close the gates, a neighbor said. That's what they do to Oprah, apparently. Apparently Oprah gets punked by Prince Harry, the author of Spare. We'll get to that in a minute. It was the world's fastest breaking change of address after moving to the United States amid a painful and public break

with the royal family. Prince Harry and his wife, oh, I, oh, I'll tell you ask my wife if the kids are black, oy. I'm working on my British accent. How is it? I'm Harry, oy. The upper class say,

oi, or is that more of a, you know, is that a punk affectation the telegraph a state british newspaper preceded the news with the most prized a fleet street boast exclude that this is a mexico bombshell but monocity of the sun-soaked celebrities studied california community uh were the royal departure spread leisurely pace no one gives a shit that's just the article i can't read these articles in their cadence these articles i mean that's the thing you read articles about these two it's not like you know it's not like i ran war coverage. It's like, uh, the bumblebees were, you know,

were seducing the ladybugs as news of Prince Harry's departure fell upon the lily pond frogs. And it's just very, you know, it's the whole thing's very low rent, low stakes. I guess high rent low stakes. That's what this is for, you know. It's just a taste of the good life. That's what these people are. The royal family's there to give you a little taste.

well you get to see you get to see what the crumb and you go oh you know what they really are they're really there to kind of create this myth that like they're broke oh the royal fair ain't they're so good and they don't have it so grass is always green than the other side hey oi is this how what do i sound like do i sound like a met head from philly i don't know if i sound i sound british but you know it's really it the whole operation in general is in the second half of the 20th century and beyond seems to be some kind of like humiliation ritual uh to create the pretense that the upper crust of society uh you know it's not all else cracked up to be oh yeah it's go this this this one diana's depressed and then the queen's ugly and uh and the empire crumble and they they can't just do what they want and harry's losing his hair and he was probably had a father who wasn't Charles. It all just seems like a, like an episode of,

uh, what's that thing they like over there? The, the in between there's, what's, um, oh, the,

the, the, the talk show they have over it. The soap opera. The high street thing, whatever. Doesn't matter. Um,

it's all there to create this kind of like, smokescreen. And it works for the rest of the world. Because you're captivated by seeing, you know, a crown go on someone's head. you know, I mean, honestly, it's amazing how captivated we are because this is a country. It's not even like, it's not one of those things where it's like, oh, like people who like

who are poor, who are resentful of it. Like our elites in America supposedly like, we're not going to have kings and we're fuck that. I mean, look, I get it. We have, we have a depressive system of banking and commodities trading that sits upon our throat. and, you know, dictates the whims of our country. We're not exactly, you know, the Republic is not exactly, you know,

a vibrant machine. But, you know, even George Washington with his wooden teeth, you know, and didn't, didn't he get a bad stomach for eating too many cherries and, and, and, or that's someone else. That was the guy who died, right? He ate the cherries in the milk, ice milk and cherries.

Someone got sick for me, and too many ice milk and cherries. I never had that. when they say ice milk is that like ice cream or it's just iced milk because you know like they say McDonald's ice cream

is actually iced milk it's not technically ice cream so if that's what they mean then that sounds quite nice it was just like it was just cold milk and cherries yeah I'd still try it but the point is we know we were never meant to you know care about the royalty

but you can't get over it there's some of the were a guy in a puffy hat and a fucking frock and he's got a scepter and you go oh it doesn't have any power it doesn't matter it's even better the fact that they keep these people around with no power it's even more captivating you know like oh the people like you have to go

because the actual like no one thinks about I want to be the king and it's like oh let me administer the Iraq well let me negotiate our stake of the Iraq war as Britain right I mean that's what Tony Blair had to do he had to pretend like he was on board the Iraq war and like like he had to go meetings like you know i guess who's this who's this fucking foreign guy jack straw or something back in the day we come in a meeting with rumsfeld probably or whatever call him powell and they're telling us about yellow cake uranium we've to buy my rack and tell me blair's like ah i get a special relationship with bush who knows what the you know

it was beneficial i guess who knows i mean it's not like should they have what was that's the best move for them probably not in hindsight you know but they've still Brexit where things have been going so quite so you know but the time they felt like they had to stick with us because you know 9-11 I feel like after 9-11 they were afraid that we were going to just start like carpet bombing Europe Tony Blair really he had a great regal style but he wasn't uh I think he was actually afraid of bush regardless like that this is the messy shit like does anyone want to do that they want to fantasized about that as a kid? No, Tony Blair comes to see you. How I'm the queen. Oh, Tony,

what's up? Oh, Bush told us about yellow cake uranium. All right. You know what you're doing. Now, bring me a crumpet. I'm gonna go, I'm gonna go duck hunt at a fucking Mount Mount Barrel castle or whatever, Balmoral. That's a nice thing about the royals. It's like, it's all the good stuff and none of the yellow cake uranium. No, none of the, hey, where's those WMDs? I'll just fire Tony Blitz. I don't give a shit I'm the fucking queen that's how it was back then now it's king charles he don't give a shit Brexit I mean that's not in his watch but whatever's going on over there he'll he's got cancer apparently I mean Zio oh god bless all right pee

no he's not dead yet but you know what's the what do you say thought some prayers I hope he gets cured of his cancer the point is you know but they're heading and Kelly Megan and Kelly Megan and uh hair are heading back. And no one is minus C don't cares. The people in Britain don't care. This also coincidentally happens. Harry and others are told to pay

Daily Mail publisher of $13 million. See, Harry and six other high-profile figures lost a privacy lawsuit against AP. Wait, no, the A-N, Associated Newspapers, which I guess owns the Daily Mail. They may eventually have to pay more than twice to that. I guess that's 13 million total. I mean, whatever.

I guess they have it, right? Prince Harry and six others were already on Friday make an initial payment of $9 million, whatever, $13 million. In July, the group of claimants, which included the singer Elton John and the actress Liz Hurley.

Remember her from Austin Powers? Probably other stuff, too. Failed in his efforts to sue the publisher, associated newspapers over allegations of phone hacking and intruding into its members' private lives between 93 and 2011. The judge whose formal title is the High Court

is Mr. Justice Nicklin, declined to impose a cap on a total payment. So it seems like they thought this is bullshit. The judge's rule incoms data, the seven claims order to pay them bound. The seven claimants have accused private investigators of listening in on phone calls, intershifting voicemail, and truth.

Two and five Canadians, will hear the words you have cancer. That's why every step and dollar raised matters. On September 19th, join thousands in Toronto for the Princess Margaret Cancer Foundation Walk. Challenge yourself, friends, and family to walk 21 kilometers in support of life-saving research. Together, we can carry the fire and help create a world free from the fear of cancer. Register today at pmcfwalk.ca.ca. Across Canada in a Volvo.

Destination, Vancouver, turn left to leave. Travel west through, approaching, continue toward you've arrived. Adventure and comfort with Volvo. Whether you prefer gas, plug-in hybrid, or fully electric, there's a Volvo for everyone. Learn more at VolvoCars.ca.

People into handing over information to obtain phone numbers. You think they fucking got hairy on or like they fucking did like sex like phone sex shit. Oh, you are you are you are you are you the fucking jinge? Oh, I'm I'm a right I'm a right hot tit. Give me a phone number of fucking I'll fucking suck you all. I'm sure British women knows. British women sound kind of nice, right? Doreen Lawrence, a member of the House of Lords racist murder case.

I don't know what what it doesn't really say what they I mean I guess they just like they saw what happened with the whole thing with the news of the world back in like having run the financial crisis right and all that shit and didn't pierce Morgan get in trouble for some of that if not I don't know I think he got me know what he was in his pay whatever he's in charge of did I don't know if he was around for that I don't accuse no one but you know point is that with a whole big controversy back then and uh it seems like they got in trouble back then now it's like you know Harry can't seem to get nothing going I mean they don't money on this guy because you know because he's a Prince of England I guess he's

part of the Illuminati the aluminati it's just it's it's amazing how much it's fallen off and even we let's get specific I mean oh you lumenade you took you free mason I mean there's a placeholder name for everyone call it the elites you know the people who do the coven of witches who govern the world, whatever. The children, you know, it's just every generation is a little more watered down, a little shittier. They used

to just have a better, there's too much shit now. You know, places like Montecito back then were just like literally country retreats. I mean, yeah, people had slaves back then and like, or whatever, you know, Irish, some kind of slavery.

Servants. You know, it was the old landed gentry. It's a little less, you know, opaque or it's more opaque. How does that word work? The point is that they're not quite as ostentatious, but they're all from behind closed doors. You go to these really rich places. They're behind large hedges, you know, you go, you drive around on the scene.

There's nothing, you don't see much. It's a beautiful place. You don't see any house. I don't have ever seen a house there. Everyone's covered in fucking in hedges. Same thing in belly go to belayer you get you get like a peak of these very rich you know a lot of these you drive around Malibu you drive around I mean yeah sometimes you see something but most these be you drive around the Hamptons a lot of the areas you know there's certain areas are on the beach very prominent

but lot of people my things are covered people cover their wealth you don't know what happens behind there so they have this myth that like they're all just you know uh oh well let we we don't have slaves anymore we don't servants like that but they probably do it's why they have all this shit and they have and they have like you know it's why they and they have these people who don't even speak english now uh where that whatever the native country that like you know here it's english and like the point is i don't i'm not against it in theory but you know you go why why they want they want they don't they want that way it is a barrier they like that they don't even want like they only want people to be servants to understand what they're saying

half the time. You know what I mean? They want a social divide. They want to, you know, they want to, but they keep it looking nice. They go, they go with a farmer's market, you know, by themselves with 16 Israeli security guards ready to shoot a cent a millionaire if they look funny at them. You know, that's the whole game. That's the whole gimmick. But it's nice, if you have it. There's a nice theater. So I understand. But I guess they lost their trial. Harry's always whining. He's always saying like, we,

you know, England, the thing is like they left England because they couldn't get enough security. Apparently, like that guy, like the Jackal guy, Carlos the Jackal type guys,

or like, it's kind of like in Star Wars. They got the fucking, like the Boba Fett and the dinosaur guy. You know, Darth Vader pays him to get Hans Solo. Whoever gets them first gets a bunch of money.

That seems to be what happened. I don't know who's, paying the bounty. But that's the story that Harry would have you tell. He can't just have, like, the normal bridge security. People hate Megan Markle who are to him so much. No one, I don't think anyone cared. I mean, it's like, you know,

I think they liked Megan Margle at first. Everyone likes Burn Notice. That was a good show. I didn't watch it, but I had never been that person who didn't like, who watched Bird Notice, didn't like it. Everyone just enjoys her pretty eyes. But then she started, but, you know, but you got a lot of reports.

Like, they were very mean to this. servants at Belmont what castle they have I forget which college it wasn't another they thought they were going to come here Harry thought he was going to make polo a fucking thing in America like professional polo he could need a whole documentary on Netflix where it's like oh boy oh look at me with the with the mallet on the horse I mean polo sound seems fun I would love to ride a horse horses i mean i don't think the horses like me to ride them but i mean it does seem majestic and you're it seems very hard too you have to like lean over while you're riding a horse and hit the mallet i respect it and also he's like they he shoot people from a helicopter in afghanistan i think

he wants us to believe that he wants us to believe that like when he wasn't playing polo he was like flying a helicopter into Mosul was an Afghan you know what's that Afghanistan you know what's that enough gas in Kandahar he's flying a helicopter if I can a black hawk or a Chinook into Kandahar and just mowing down village whatever he was doing I don't know what you know I didn't serve so I'm not going to judge what Harry did

not you know I'm not I'm not gonna I'll never judge another man's war crimes But you know, but it's but he plays polo no one wanted it. We barely watch Formula One here. It took years to get Formula One going. No one's gonna watch Polo because the Prince of England who isn't even like probably he's probably like that soldier. What's his name? I was gonna Google Harry's real father

Prince Harry's real father now I know that's scandalous. No, because this is King Charles III though this guy. this the you see the guy in the right that dude he's some kind of like soldier or something he's an article prince harry addresses it

Prince Harry addresses rumor James Yu is his father this is probably the old article a few years ago for decades there's been speculation am I gonna have an egg on my I don't give a shit I'm a I'm a muckraker I'll talk about it

Prince Harry's a Acutely aware of the rumors about his real father quote real father for decades there's been speculation that Princess Diana's former lover James Hewitt So that's not that's not disputed they were lovers, right? Is it is a 30 at the time 38 year old's true father despite the fact that Harry's born in 84 and the couple's romance Reportly started in 87 and allegedly none other than King Charles III would laugh off the paternity claims according to Harry's new memoir spare Pah like telling stories. O, Pah like telling stories. And this one was the best of his repertoire.

Harry wrote in this book. One of his stories was about whether or not you, you know, you were some other guy's kid. I mean, even if the end of it is not, is that you warrant, it's like a weird thing for that he part of his repertoire. He said, Charles used to joke, who knows if I'm really the Prince of Wales?

Who knows if I'm even your real father? Maybe you're a real father. in Broadmoor darling boy that doesn't seem like a great recalling how Charles would laugh and laugh Harry willing to say it was a remarkably unfunny joke given the rumor circulating yeah I don't know I mean it sounds like he was it sounds like he was just basically saying yeah I'm not gonna do anything about it but you know this what is that's what if I was this kid that's why I would you know so let's go with that so the point is um

He's probably this James zero guy is probably his dad, but whatever. No one's trying to take away your money, Harry. He deserves half the money. He has to look. He had to watch his mother die because the tabloids got in bed with, you know, I don't know. Someone. Besides someone else probably misod. I don't know.

Someone killed Diana. Oh, what was it? What was it? What was it? What did it cost him on Biana peel? Does I say Biana peel? Biana Piana Pianna Pia. Um, point is

All's well and ends well. And so Harry's doing real good. They got that show on Netflix. And he wrote a book spare, by the way. You mentioned spare. Um, this is his book spare. Where he complained about being the spare, the spare tire in the royal family.

I don't know. it seems like a kind of a kind of a pussy thing to do oh i'm so sad oh you're the you're the fucking like prince of england stop it why don't you do a coup see if i was in charge if i was in hairy shoes i would say first of all we're going to get megan margall on stranger things they could have done that they should have not tried to make an empire it's like what are we doing here we need to get megan merkle on the on the hit the highest shows Get her on the walk dead. Now now, but you know, back when, you know, six years ago, that was still going, right?

Get her to, get her to replace Glenn on the walking dead. Or get her on to Stranger Things. Get her, they could have gotten her. You tell me they wouldn't have put her in succession. That's the thing. They tried to make an empire. And they should, it's just like England. Fuggan with the Falklands War.

They should have realized the limitations. You know, and we should have realized by Iran. Stop. The problem is no one who. on top ever wants to stop biting off more thing and chew they want to chew the whole big the big hairy thing of it all oh that's a pun but you know they did no one wants to take you know readjust their appetites and so what they should have done i mean look because they they got this money where is it they don't seem to have like i think they spend so much i think they

spend ransom money i think look i'm going to speculate very hard here don't i mean quote me if you want but just but for the courts I'm speculating but please quote me but I'm speculating that it seems like some like something like something like there's like I don't know it was a hoax or the actual like you know kidnapping ring or whatever like called them and they just agreed to start paying money to not get kidnapped I don't mean kidnap ransom insurance it seems like it seems like they're just paying people off I don't know where all this much I mean how much is private security cost I know bodyguards are expensive

but I mean like didn't they get like hundreds of millions of dollars from Spotify their house and minus Ced is 15 million where they buying you know yacht cake what's a yacht cake I don't know expensive cake that you eat on a yacht

what's it sound like uh it just seems like you know so I imagine that they're just dumping money they really should i think he he look he he he has had his head turned around i think he got a lot gaslighting his dad would make fun of him because he you know saying he wasn't really a son which he probably isn't but whatever uh you got all turned around i don't blame him and then you know

megan you know her career is waning so she yeah i'm not saying they're not in love they're the lovers they're in love they love each other kiss kiss but i'm just saying that you know they they're They're both so eager to like get away from their situation that they're just naively paying off by kidnappers in advance. You're not supposed to, you know, you need like you need to have an intermediary. I feel like they're so gaslit that they're paying people. Where is their money going is my point? There's too much money for them to be like out of money. I don't know what they do.

Did he buy a polo team? Is he buying diamonds? Like how much security is he have? Is he have an entire army? Is he going back to England to bring his private? Here's what I would say if I was him. Or I'm paying a private army. I might as well try to use it to like do a coup in England.

Because they're fine. I watched some of the crown. And the guy who played Taiwan Lanester, Charles Dan, in game of drones he played uh dicky mount baton or whatever his name was which is the brother of uh prince philip i think i'm not sure but he did a coup apparently um we tried to do a coup with a bunch of businessmen didn't work and they banished them or something but the point is you can just do like do that why don't you just try to take over england i don't look he's the thing

if you could strong arm your way like if he if if harry did some shakespeare shit because who isn't even in charge england anymore what's the prime minister was i don't remember the new guy's name very forgettable they did they had a bunch of people you know they had what's his name well who's the crazy looking guy um boris right boris carlo that boris uh whatever and then they had fucking uh David Cameron and then Theresa May.

And it just keeps getting weird and weirder. And no one remembers the new guy's name. Two and five Canadians will hear the words you have cancer. That's why every step and dollar raised matters. On September 19th, join thousands in Toronto for the Princess Margaret Cancer Foundation walk. Challenge yourself, friends, and family to walk 21 kilometers in support of life-saving research. together we can carry the fire and help create a world free from the fear of cancer register today at pmcf walk.cai a indian guy for a year like i didn't even know i don't think anyone

knew um i don't know how well he did uh people seem to people seem to not be bothered too much about it uh so my point is none of these people i don't think any of them like did a lot of shit going on on in england They have a lot of problems, much like us. And so I feel like if you, if Perry managed to bring a private army into London, in the city of London or wherever Buckingham Palace is, and kind of get them into business. Because coups are usually not about, not too much shooting, I think.

A lot of times it's like you get the pieces into position, right? And then you buy the generals off, a few general, a few key generals. you secure the capital, you secure the banking system, you secure the radio, the communications, the TV stations, stuff like that. You don't have to have a civil war for a thousand years. I mean, you can, but there doesn't have to be. He could just get a very quiet little coup going.

And I don't know if it's a political apparatus would care that much. It would actually be good. I mean, that would actually be exciting. What's the point of a royal family that doesn't do that kind of shit. The whole reason people care about royal families in general is really the old stuff.

It's the stuff like Richard III, right? And Henry VIII and who is the stewards, right? And the king of the Duke of Orange, all that shit, right? And then the British Civil War, the War of the roses. That's the good stuff, right? like kings taking out kings you know Richard the lionheart had to be fucking

uh ransomed the whole robin hood thing make himself make himself a modern day robin hood say that's what he should say he like he should if i was hairy i would come back to england and maybe he will be but he should definitely and like you know and again this is the repeated theme i have

where politicians and people of note need to start paying me some kind of purse, some kind of, you know, fucking stipend for these ideas. Because I know they're going to be using them. They're too good not to use. And I don't need a lot of money. But I need some money. I need to start getting paid a little bit for these ideas. Go to England.

Make yourself a modern-day Robin Hood. Say you're going to give money back to the working class. You're not going to. Money back to the working class. No taxes for the working class. No taxes for them. I mean, free health care. I guess they have that already.

whatever you know start offering shit um and by the time the dust settles i mean you know you'll be the king and like whatever you'll mean like i'm not you don't need to i'm not you just you send the kids to live in like you know australia like fireworks going off is that because harry's leaving very interesting you know i'm not saying that you know because here's the thing charles has cancer You know, there's an article I just saw. This is very, very odd. Queen Camilla says it was difficult to keep Charles's cancer a secret. I was just learning to let it out, Camilla says.

This is why the worst British? I was just longing to let it out. Camilla said in a rare public comments about the King's 24th diagnosis, which was not immediately revealed, but obviously I couldn't. It seems like, and look at this picture, it doesn't seem, I mean, why was she longing to try it out? Like, it seemed like I just wanted to tell people, like, he's shitting himself, his blood's poisoned with chemo.

In the video released on Wednesday, Queen Camilla made rare public comments about King Charles of Third's cancer, talked about how difficult diagnosis has been. I thought he was fine. I was just longing to collect it out. I was it couldn't. Camilla was reflecting on 24-4 visit with cancer patients and their families. When they were like, oh, you know, they were all winching about their families. I wanted to be like, oh, my husband has cancer.

Shut your mouth. Shut your whole. The queen who's been involved with Maggie's, is that a charity? Maggie's for years, had often made visits, whatever. Charles condition is still a secret. She could not tell the others. Give me the skinny. What's the deal with this?

In December, when Charles told the British public that he was doing well and could scale back his treatment, he said it was a testimony to the remarkable advances. He was fine. stop looking for sympathy for surviving cancer you know enough people die of cancer still when you survive just be like yeah it's all good no I beat it's fine

I mean look I get it if you're like if you're working at like a job like if you were if you're a manager McDonald's or even you're a stockbroker and your boss is like why are where it's your pep like I just had cancer last week yeah tell people I'm not saying I'm not I'm not saying hide it but don't use it just to get like fucking little brownie points for no reason. Use it, you know, appropriately, you know, if you're a Sherpa.

Like, if you're a Sherpa, tell people, hey, I had cancer last year. So I might not be chirping as well. But this whole shit with, what is Charles up to? This is all, this is all just shit to, you know, in England, they have the cancer. That's probably, it's probably all related to the Epstein shit. It's like, hey, no one cares about we have cancer. Harry, I know we have bad blood because I asked if your kids are going to be black. I'm sorry.

But, you know, people are still annoyed about the Epstein thing. I don't get it. I don't know why. You know, my brother, you know, my brother just happened to be friends with the world's most notorious pedophile. Pedophile. Oh, my chores. And they're not liking it. And, you know, what if William caught him?

cancer from Charles or whatever you know what has it that's the thing so there's two things going on it's possible that Charles asked Harry hey get back in the fold we need something else some of the juice going on some of the some of the some of some of the action to distract this shit because people keep could make yeah I don't know look maybe does it not stop at Andrew maybe maybe I mean that's a speculation I don't know I am just a muckraker right here um But people don't just make a big deal and then go back to England. There's no reason to. There's got to be something going on.

He kept whining about how his security cards can't have guns. That seems, you know, it sounds, it does sound like they, you would think like, hey, like, I'll pay my own security, but like they have to have guns. And like, England's like, well, we don't have, you know, they can't have guns. You rely on our yellow vested police or whatever to protect your kids. It does sound like something's fishy. in Denmark. Uh, I don't know.

Um, the other alternative idea is that Harry senses weakness. Don't forget Harry is a war hero. Harry flew helicopters into Kandahar or whatever. Where did, let's see, where, what did Harry do in the war? Let's just Google that. What did Harry? I know he supposedly flew helicopter. Do in the war.

He served the British Army for 10 years, well, you know, Two active tours of duty in the war in Afghanistan. He trains an officer at Sanhurst, deployed a forward air controller, and later qualifies as a pal. He wasn't an Apache attack helicopter pilot. He served 10 weeks in Helmand Province, Afghanistan. There's a place called Helmand Province in Afghanistan

as a forward air controller. He helped coordinate airstrikes. He was pulled out early after a media blackout broke and his location league to raising security risks. in his second tour in 2012 2013 returned to Afghanistan every 20 weeks with the Army Air Corps he operated as an Apache helicopter

pilot and gunner taking part in combat missions in his memoir spare he wrote that he flew on six missions that resulted in taking the lives of 25 enemy fighters but he didn't kill him it seems weird to specify

um I was indirectly responsible for 25 guys getting killed i mean i know you want to make your bonafide's but it might be a little they class a to like you know even if you did shoot them yourself i have 25 confirmed kills i don't think you're supposed to say that when you're the prince like i mean it's fine i mean i'm i'm all for but i get it people are always going to be you know i assume it does seem odd that you will allow but i guess maybe maybe he resents it because your first instinct my for his instinct is to say, not to say he doesn't have the will to serve, right?

The bravery to serve. I don't know. It just seems like would they really allow him to be put in harm's way? And maybe he knows that they probably shouldn't usually do that for Prince of England or whatever he is. But they did and he feels, because they know he's just, you know, he's just the other guy's kid maybe or whatever. I'm not trying to say, I analyze the guy.

But that's possible, right? That seems plausible enough. And so he's kind of overcompensating going, oh, you know, 25 guys wouldn't be dead without me. Well, you killed them. Might as well have. I flew. I flew the guys who did.

Flew them right into, I mean, look, it's not nothing. I'm trying that close to people who are killing people. It's not something I've done. You know, don't get me wrong. I just I'm not saying that he's like less than you know am I questioning his manhood over it at all far from it just says a little odd but that's what they do they tear his guy up so whatever this is all this is all brought up to make the point that perhaps you know compared to his brother and his father perhaps he's a little you know he's a little bit more qualified maybe he flies in Patrick helicopter or over the, you know, Buckingham Palace.

What would they do? I mean, I don't have a military. But, you know, it's kind of like 9-11. A 9-11, I bring up probably too often. Just, you know, repeat it. But, like, the whole thing, like, they always was a kid, they would always tell, you know, oh, there's a fucking anti-aircraft thing in the White House.

They'll shoot down a plane. Never happened, right? Like, if it wasn't brought down, Pennsylvania, shanksville, you know, whatever. it was there was no like depending on i got ahead nothing there's control the airspace whatever you know know so in the same way i don't want anything god forbid this prince harry does do this i'm gonna be in a lot of trouble probably uh the algorithm you know that that'll be that'll be the irony you sure will finally take off because i'll fucking get like i'll get aggregated because i predicted

that harry will find a patchy helicopter uh assault team the assault team into maybe he's all his all his all team from Afghanistan he should do is it I can say this right it's not like I'm saying it's not treasonous I don't think they should kill any I wouldn't use your old assault team because they apparently they kill 25 guys I don't think here should kill anybody I just think you know uh you can probably just pay off the those um those bee feeder guys you know the guards those guys are the big hats British beef feeder garles picture of them up British beef eater guards are those the beef eaters uh these guys yeah pay these guys off right the secret life of beef eaters

haven't guarded the Tower of London since 1485 the yeoman orders were three million welcome three million visitors a year but the power doesn't shut down when tourists leave nor does this hidden pub okay so I mean, you know, these guys seem to, this seems like what you want. They're dressed cool, I guess. You know, they have spears, but they spend most of their time in a pub that they built inside the Tower of London, which used to be, you know, fucking a prison, I guess. You get, you pay these guys off.

You buy it, you, you get them some new tag, uh, kegs for their pub. And you, and they'll secure. You don't want to bring. The last thing you want to do if you're hairy is to bring in some kind of like armed special forces group uh from the s as a you're like i'll bring my own team in and they just end up blowing down people in bucket damn palace it was the craziest thing in the world no one will be on their side but he gets a bunch of these weird guys or spears that don't even work to like basically do like basically pantomime uh taking control of the palace that's what that that's

the speed that he know he this this is this is not i mean this could go real real bad real fast it depends on i mean how much Charles should fucking give maybe should make Harry King of England or something. Why don't they divide this shit up? What's the point of having multiple countries if you, you know, if you're not going to have your kids run them? They do it wrong in England. Harry should be like, what is he, the Prince of, uh,

the Prince of Wales is his son, right? Wales is like, why is, so when you're Prince of England, you get whales. I mean, not the shit on the Welch. I mean, but it's small, right? Whoa, isn't Scotland very big? Why isn't like the, he's like the Arab parents should have Scotland at least. And then like give hairy whales.

Two and five Canadians will hear the words you have cancer. That's why every step and dollar raised matters. On September 19th, join thousands in Toronto for the Princess Margaret Cancer Foundation walk. Challenge yourself, friends, and family to walk 21 kilometers in support of life-saving research. together we can carry the fire and help create a world free from the fear of cancer register today at pmcf walk.ca or cae

or southern island which one do they get southern island whatever one they control in england northern give them fucking France make Harry why don't look here's the thing why don't you make Harry Harry should maybe try to fucking become king of France they don't like kings though they haven't had kings for a while in France

but i mean that's the thing there's the need to get that rivalry going back the whole middle ages there was england and france right i mean for a lot of it france just controlled england um these are the kind of things that harry should be doing not fucking playing polo on netflix or whining about being a spare tire you know you had your chance to make me put me and margle over you had your chance these people are also fucking small-minded oh let's go to the fucking Monastida, who gives a shit? It smells like olives, who cares?

It's very pretty. Oh, the water. You know, this thing. When you're, being rich, it's wonderful, and it's the best thing in the world, probably. But let's just, but, you know, it's probably boring in a good way.

I'm, I'm torn between not wanting to cope. Not I'm not sounding I'm coping. I don't really, I don't personally give a shit about gardens. Oh, look how nice the light is. Oh, grass. Personally, I can, I don't want to sound like, oh, I wouldn't want to be rich. I mean, I wouldn't mind a little like a four-foot pool.

Don't get me wrong. So whatever, get that out of the way. I'm saying is when you're a royal, you shouldn't give a shit. You should be above that, is my point. You should be more concerned with bloodlines and fucking strategy. I'm not saying you have to control your own country, like, you know, in the old days. but these you know it's just unbecoming to like living monocito with Oprah you know making your own honey you should be fucking securing alliances with like you know you should be securing

if i was hairy i would be making deals with Putin i would be making deals with um what's his name in china z chi what's he Gee, Z, G, yeah, make some deals. You tell me he can't get a meeting? I bet you can get a meeting. I bet he can go, hey, look, if you back me, it wouldn't take much. What, whatever China has to give Harry to take over

the royal family of England? I'm telling you this. If it became known, that Harry was backed by Xi and Putin a little bit. You know, he had, he secured Iranian oil, right? he made some back-end deals no blood will be spilled probably I'm gonna pay off the bee feeders

we're gonna use some Chinese nationals you know the whatever maybe maybe it'll be Australian nationals I don't know mercenaries we'll get some guys in the French Foreign Legion and overpower I mean how about who is guarding

Buckingham Palace I'm saying that whoever is the prime minister who is the prime minister of England I mean, I literally don't know right now. I feel, I usually know. They named the new one a few weeks ago, or a few months ago or something. Prime Minister of England.

Not England, right? It's the UK. Andy Burnham. This guy. Are you telling me that this guy, Andy Burnham is going to put up a fight to make sure that King Charles stays on the throne? What does he care?

He's not risking his neck. if Harry comes in with some kind of crazy deal with G and Putin it's not going to happen Harry could just slice in like a knife through butter a hot knife even Andy Burnham Andy Burnham or let him just become

Prime Minister we wanted to no one's putting up a fight 1970 this guy's not doing shit I'm telling you make some deals he's just big a deal with Iraq make a deal with all Britain's you know make a deal with Argentina

you know with the Falklands the war remember maybe you don't remember it was a war it was kind of like they were Vietnam I think and the Falklands Islands and the there are islands off the coast of Argentina Britain controlled them back in the 80s

Thatcher I think they they seized them and the Thatcher sent the fucking army or the Navy or whatever it was a mess big mess like a little dog I don't know how many but enough right the mess I'm sure Argentina uh yeah it's the control is to consume them I don't know but I'm sure if if Harry came to them and said hey over some nice Argentinian beef which that which is some of the best beef in the world

they say I've had an urge I've been to Argentinean steakhouse it's fine it was good I want to try it again sometime I think it's more that they just have so many heads of cattle over there's more beef than people there's no more cows and people in Argentina so for ten bucks you can get a phenomenal steak I don't know if the steak is that much better maybe it is I don't know if it makes if you get if he travels from our this is not a point you have a nice steak you talk about the fucking

coup and you go Argentina look yeah we're kind of over the falcon thing yeah but what you can better just why not stick it to him I go yeah you know what why not and you get a little help from Argentina you know it's not like you need like argentina can't conquer england right probably i don't know what their military forces like but they can get they but in a coup situation they can provide just enough support about with other people that you get something going and you seize the throne of england back for your father james uitt and your mother and you make and you and you name diana queen in abstentia or something

that would be nice wouldn't that be nice you're fucking your fucking name you disown Charles he's not really your father you fucking name you name diana

queen it's probably a term for it queen abso ghosto so it's in Latin and you fucking bring on or back to your family and I'm not saying

you know no one's saying a guillotine King Charles. This is all crazy talk. You send them to a resort. Britain owns a bunch of shit still, the British Virgin Islands. You send them there. You send them to a fucking nice club men.

No one's, you know, this is all pageantry. If everyone plays nice. But don't forget that the only person who's got experienced not playing nice is Prince Harry, who flew the guys who killed 25 guys in Afghanistan. all right this guy means business hey i've i mean again it's more than i've ever done so i'm not

shud it's just a very funny thing that's made the point of like i flew i flew the guys who killed 25 guys just say you killed them say you fucking shot him with your minigone or something won't get a question i don't know i don't know how i access british army records it's just an awkward phrasing i believe it though i believe you know it seems odd that's why he's got chipp on his shoulder to forget that's why because he's not supposed to be in that situation he's not supposed to be

he like he was literally doing it you know like he was kind of it was a bluff probably at first I'm not saying it's a cow it's not the opposite I'm just saying but at a certain level of like yeah but you're not going to let you know and they and they're like yeah all right go go to go to Afghanistan

yeah fly in Apache fly in Apache helicopter and a fly 25 guys fly some guys who kill 25 guys you go you gonna let me do this like I'm so am I not precious cargo and that's where he probably got the idea for his book but he said that's the thing he wasn't even seen as a spare a spare you keep in the trunk you don't just send it off Afghanistan that's the thing so it's time for harry to get what's you know what he deserves I know it's it's nice to shit on them because they came here in America and they tried to

you know, take over American life and he and try to chef polo and Megan Markle down our throats and we didn't want it. We had enough of burn notice. All right. But now it's time for him. This is actually a good time. It's a good thing for Harry. It's a purging thing. It's like a belief a time of bulimia for Harry. He can come back and purge himself of all that messiness and launch a coup against his father, his fake father. James Hewitt. I mean James Hewitt is still alive. make James Hewitt like the king regent the king the king uh the dowager king can there be a dowager king

I know like I know it's from game of thrones mostly because remember like when Searcy uh was the queen and then you know king uh you know she's involved was that was what was the the original fat king uh he gets killed by the boar but he was poisoned right and so joffrey takes over and then he gets and then he marries uh what's her name marjorie and then she goes what do i call you dowager queen

but there is i think what you call her dowager queen can you have a dowager king i mean print i mean he would just be a prince i guess because philip was like in the position of king sort of but he you know he was just he he was the husband of elizabeth but they got more progressive so so his dad james you will be prince of england harry will be king William will be in jail I mean ankle monitor they'll set if he plays nice they'll send him to a fucking

you know a casino in monaco with an ankle monitor and he'll be guarded by beef eaters you better behave no no deals for you no back end deals for William all right it's just he doesn't have it in him

he didn't he never flew 25 guys or guys who kill 25 guys all right don't best with me. I flew the guys who killed 25 guys, Big Brother. You don't want this smoke. You don't want none of it.

And then, you know, this could be like a restart for the royal family. And then you'll make it Michael. And then they'll bring back burn notice and relaunch her career. And she was on an episode of Fringe. And the Fringe was a really good show.

He only only one episode. but she was fine I had a problem with her like you know that's the thing this whole American experience it's for the birds but go back there

conquer the throne take what's yours get justice for Diana get justice for James you at your father take back it's like a fucking Shakespeare thing is total Shakespeare shit

you know and then your kids can grow up proud of you. Instead, you know, even your kids are looking and you're going on, you're despair. And honestly, like, that, that,

that, that, that, kind of rhymes with despair. Your whole life is despair. C, D, ESP, despair.

It's a play on words. Your own words. How about you? How about you, they know you as the fucking criminal king of England? Wouldn't that be nice? And fucking,

again, I always forget his name. Andy Burnham Andy Burnham the Prime Minister will not do shit I guarantee it I would bet my life that Andy Burnham will bow down before the criminal King of England Harry

It'll be a fine thing indeed Welcome Back to England We missed you The Elton John will come out And you can do a new candle in the wind Oh hello English rose

You son hello your son is avenged you Maryland Monroe they found her nude I mean that song is I mean the original they admitted they remade candle in the wind when they Anna died

I only this week like we actually listen to the words of candle on the wind it's very weird I know like I Bernie Taup and roll of the lyrics for Elton John it was like a lot it was just like you know it was just like they found you in the nude I'm the only guy

who didn't view you sexually. And then he remade that song for Diana when she died. It just seems kind of trashy. It seemed like maybe write her a new song, but whatever. It'll be candle in the win three. Hello, Prince Harry.

You've taken your father's throne by force. Afghanistan was where you learned your trade. You burned out. You carried all the men who killed all the men. And now you're here. being a new king

and all your life you're a candle in the wind setting fires in the village in Kandah you know I hope I got a copyright story for that is that possible look I don't know I don't want much

I wouldn't look if Harry hears this on some off chip please if you know him share it He'll have a laugh and then maybe get an idea. And all I'm saying is if you do it, let me get a little castle. I don't like a shit, whatever, like one of those, I don't, I don't need my own thing. I don't mind going through your security teams every day to get to my like, you know, cottage. The cottages, they call them cottages are very big.

You know, Mark, making Merkle apparently high pro. I'd be fine with it. Oh, it's a little, isn't disrepair. It probably is all full of mold. Whatever. I'll watch this old house and, and yinky workshop and i'll fucking fix it that's all i'm asking for i'm not asking for much just give me a piece for the idea we're don't or just we know or stick to being you know whatever

i'm like i'll hold off i was going to say something me no you know king king hattery how about how does that sound huh give me something give me going to get a taste all right hope it goes well thanks much for tuning in and I'll be late to show and if you don't forget if you love the show if you love comp and you want more comp every week extra episode of

Kump Patreon.com slash Ray Kump bonus episode bonus video episodes every week also if you'd rather watch it on YouTube it's available as a bonus episode on YouTube bonus just go to the premium

bonus content and you sign up there Lovely. So, you know, enjoy that. And have a great week. See you next week.