Kyle Kingsbury Podcast - #196 Jade Bryce and Mercedes Terrell

Episode Date: April 24, 2021

Jade and Mercedes are the hosts of the Majic Hour Podcast which I’ve been on in the past. They are powerhouses of women with a wealth of knowledge on both Women’s and Men’s work. It was a long one, but I’m sure you’ll love this convo just as much as I did. They are launching a new Men’s work group, Awakening the King Within,  that we dive into and there is some information on their socials as well. If you feel called, please go dive into it with them. The signup link is below.  Connect with Jade and Mercedes   Instagram: @themajichour  @thejadebryce @mercedesterrell     Facebook: Jade Bryce Mercedes Terrell     Twitter: @thejadebryce @mercedesterrell Show Notes:   Awakening the King Within  www.awakeningkings.com  Sponsors:   Organifi Go to organifi.com/kkp for some Greens, it’s my favorite way to easily get the most potent blend of high vibration fruits, veggies and other goodies into your diet! Click that link and use code “KKP” at checkout for 20% off your order! Sovereignty Head to https://sovereignty.co/kyle to grab my favorite CGN/ Nootropic. There is nothing like this product for energy and cognitive function! Use code “KKP” at checkout for 20% off. Grab their reformulated flagship product PURPOSE+ Birch is the comfiest mattress I’ve owned, not to mention it’s all organic, non-toxic sourced materials. With this offer you get $200 off of any mattress, two free pillows, their standard 100 night risk free trial and 25 year warranty. You can’t go wrong folks. Go to birchliving.com/kyle and use codeword “KYLE” Fit For Service Academy App Join the tribe on the all new academy app with the first month free! Apple - Google Play   Connect with Kyle:   Instagram: @livingwiththekingsburys   Youtube: Kyle Kingbury Podcast  Kyles website: www.kingsbu.com    Like and subscribe to the podcast anywhere you can find podcasts. Leave a 5-star review and let me know what resonates or doesn’t.

Welcome back to the show, y'all. We've got a juicy episode for you guys in store today with the return of my beautiful friend, Jade Bryce, alongside Mercedes Terrell. They are the hosts of The Magic Hour. Magic Hour is a podcast that I've been a guest on early on, and I'm often talking about how many guests I get from Paul Cech, but I've also nabbed quite a few guests from these wonderful ladies who have a new program coming out for men on all sorts of good stuff, from archetypes, king, warrior, magician, lover, to what turns women on, everything on how to be the best version of yourself as a man from a woman's perspective. And we dive into all that and more on this podcast. It's one of my favorite podcasts that I've recorded in recent history. It's really fun. It's really juicy. We dive into sex and all sorts of fucking weird stuff like fetishes and quite a few different things that I haven't necessarily discussed on this podcast. I know there's a lot here for you. So let me know

what you think at living with the Kingsbury's on Instagram. And of course, check out our sponsors. We are brought to you today by Organifi. Organifi is one of my favorite products, one of my favorite companies on the planet. They make several products that I absolutely love that are indispensable. It's one of the ways that I really tackle my health from all angles to make sure I'm getting in micronutrients from different master plants and key medicines that I don't necessarily get in every day. I don't eat moringa. I don't eat ashwagandha. I don't eat chlorella, but I still get into my diet because of Organifi Greens, along with the gold and the red and all the other amazing products

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make do with whatever bed we're on. I've purchased new beds before and just made it do because I had made the investment of purchasing a new bed that I didn't like. And of all the beds that I have, we have several. In fact, I recorded this podcast on a couple of them out in the living room. They're all decent beds, but the best bed I've ever slept on is Birch Living.

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slept on. It's firm enough for my big ass body to not have back pain when I wake up because I'm a side sleeper and it's still soft and comfy and it's just amazing. So if you're looking for a new mattress, check out birchliving.com slash Kyle and get your $200 off plus two free organic pillows. They have a 25 year warranty and you get to try it out for a hundred nights risk-free. They'll pick it up for you if you don't love it, but I know you will. Once again, check it out, birchliving.com slash Kyle, birchliving.com slash Kyle. And of course, we've got all these links to the show notes. Last but not least, I want to tell you guys a bit about Fit for Service. Many of you have heard me talk about Fit for Service, where I'm one of the coaches alongside Aubrey Marcus, Eric Godsey,

who's been a guest on the podcast, and Caitlin Howe. What we've just created now is the first ever Fit for Service Academy app. And one of the reasons we created that was because we wanted to be able to include people who couldn't either afford Fit for Service or simply didn't have the time to travel and do all of the events and be there with us, but still wanted to be a part of the program. We now have the Fit for Service Academy, which is available to all. And you get your first month free to check it out. And it's a community of like-minded individuals who are really trying to push themselves and grow and learn and do the best that they possibly can and really find other people that are awesome and doing the same shit that they are.

There's book clubs. They have a poetry club. They have all sorts of cool things that you can dive into from biohacking to breathwork. Aubrey's put up guided breathwork meditations, other meditations, ecstatic dance. If you have never tried it before and you want to get weird in your living room with your family members and you don't have a playlist to ecstatic dance to, there's all sorts of cool things that you can get through. And we also have masterclasses. I've laid out a masterclass on all things health and wellness that you can dive through. Three hours of content that will have you really set off on the right foot in any direction that you want to take your health to, to the next level. Fitness goals, health goals, any of that stuff. That's my three-hour powerhouse available there at any time

you want to access it over at Fit for Service Academy. And you can check that out available everywhere on Google Play, iTunes, all of these things. Get it for your first month for free, Fit for Service Academy. And without further ado, my girls, Jade Bryce, Mercedes Terrell, thank you guys for tuning in. Mercedes, Jade, here we are. I finally got y'all in bed together. It's been done. For the YouTubers.

Only Jimmy Smith has done it before. They get to see the setup upstairs is three king-size beds in like an L-shape, like an L-shape couch, but courtesy of Aaron Alexander and being more on the floor. This is the podcast station as of late, the latest. You guys are the first to break it in with me. Yeah, we're honored. Hell yeah. Well, Jade, you've been a guest on the show once or twice before. Mercedes, your first time coming on.

I've been on the magic hour with the two of you guys. How long have you guys had that podcast? It'll be three years in October. Damn, ballin'. I remember when it was first starting. Yeah. Yeah. You were one of our first guests. I feel like you're right in the beginning there. But yeah, just thinking of that, how many people start a YouTube channel and it goes away or start a podcast and it goes away. And I remember talking to at least Jade about that. Like, don't worry, your first five suck. You remember that Tim Ferriss that just posted that blog?

But our first one was Paul Selig. Yeah, that was dope. You guys came out the gate swinging. Yeah. That's super cool. And you've been in communist California through all of this badness. you're in Orange County. So still like a red pocket inside of a blue state. Definitely. That's good. You guys have a hell of a thing that you guys have put together for men. And that's

why I wanted to have you guys come on here because, um, you know, there's, there's so much right now. It's, it's funny because like out of left field, everyone's in every, everyone's a YouTuber, everyone's a podcaster, everyone's a gamer, everyone's a this or that. It's like, if there's, if there is a, a large percent of the population moving in one direction, you hear like, Oh, hands raised. Yeah, I do that too. You know? And it's kind of a funny thing. It always cracks me up, but everyone's a coach now, you hear like, oh, hands raised. Yeah, I do that too. And it's kind of a funny thing. It always cracks me up, but everyone's a coach now and everyone is doing men's groups now and everyone's starting as a men's group or doing these things. And I've had to take a deep breath

and set aside judgment, but also at the same time, recognize that equivalency is something that's needed and who better to teach men than women? So like, seriously, like, like I know men's groups, it's a different thing, the men's movement. And of course, when I talk about King, Warrior, Magician, Lover, and things like that, that is its own genre of, of work that needs to be done. Tell me about your guys' program, what you guys have coming out right now, because this is awesome. And I think it's going to help a lot of dudes. And at the same time, it's not exactly, um, you know, apples to apples with what a lot of the men are gathering around to do with each other these days. I feel like it's really, it's definitely unexpected. And a lot of our influence have

come from the men in our lives that we consider Kings. One of them being you, Kyle, um, the influence that we've picked up along our journey, especially during this time where we've been podcasting because we've been able to interview and really research and get into studying lots of different men and their methods on men's work and, you know, the way that you approach it yourself and just getting to know all these different modalities of the people in our sphere, how they do it. And then taking our little flavor of, you know, we are sexy models.

Like we do this sexuality on the forefront thing. And we've been able to combine that with- We're now calling it the Trojan horse. Yes, exactly. The Trojan horse approach is kind of what we're describing it as because it is us, you know, saying like, hey, come and, you know, come into this, this, this, um, new way of thinking about introspective work from a very sexy forefront, you know, and it's okay if you start as objectifying us in the forefront, which I think a lot of people are so worried about for us.

And they don't think that too, like it can be held together, you know, um you know taking that that objectification piece or whatever way they enter the work maybe they're not objectifying women quote-unquote but maybe they're just like attracted to women which is okay guys um and then they're diving deeper with us like they're getting in on our only fans whatever getting into the dms with us and maybe they did approach the work originally with uh sexy video content that we're putting out there something something like that. And then they actually want to know more about what else are we doing here? Cause we talk about it a lot on all of our social platforms. Like, Hey, have you thought about this? Have you been thinking about life in this way? What mantra are you using today? And then the work opens from there for some, for some that's maybe never going to happen.

Yeah. We laugh. Like if you catch your boyfriend on only fans, you better hope he's on our page because we're really recommending he reads way the superior man or King warrior magician lover. But I love that you brought up men learning from women because I, I do feel that men need to be initiated by elder men that like that is part of the way like being acknowledged by another king is part of the way that they step into their king but I feel that a lot of a lot of men

one of the things that someone had said is like if he could have all of his clients recognize one thing it's how much how big their mother wound is and I think that's a lot of the things that someone had said is like, if he could have all of his clients recognize one thing, it's how much, how big their mother wound is. And I think that's a lot of the reason why I know you don't do this because you're different, but a lot of men, I feel like their, their woman is such an Oracle of truth for them. And,

and like a voice of God, it's, she's can be the, the conscious man's compass if he allows that, but she can say something that is so important. And then three weeks later, he's like, oh, you know what someone told me today? And it's verbatim what she said three weeks ago,

because it's like, there's this, almost like this trust issue that women have this wisdom that can be used, you know? So what we're hoping too, is that men can open up to that innate wisdom that's be used you know so what we what we're hoping too is that men can open up to that innate wisdom that's within women and then also um the the other thing that's interesting about the only fans is like they're they're coming in like we said with the objectification but a lot of times or majority

of the time, they're actually looking for connection because it's, it is different than going to a strip club and watching porn where there's not the conversation, you know what I mean? So we found that that's a lot of the, the reason why they're signing up and why they're- And to jerk off to your feet. Yeah, that too. But you know, you're, you're a hundred percent right. And actually strip clubs, strip club, like I've, I worked at a couple of different strip clubs when I was fighting.

And one of them give a shout out sporties, bikini bar out in Sunnyvale, sporties, bikini bars, still alive and strong. Yep. Um, you know, it really was about the conversation. You know, so many guys would pay for dances, $20 a dance, and they would, you know, buy a bunch up front and just chat. They wouldn't even have, I'd be like, why is this, what's this guy trying to do over here? He's not even asking for a dance. And I'm like, is he trying to go home with her? Like, what's the angle here? That's the way I looked at it as a bouncer. And, um, a lot of the guys just, you know, a lot of them were regulars. A lot of them I got to know, and they just wanted a chance to talk to women. They wanted a chance to understand them and see where they were at on their life path. And whether it's through OnlyFans or any of these things, I think it's such a missing piece,

especially with the demasculization of men. The fact that men don't know how to be men anymore. They don't know what's allowed, what's proper, what is the way to do this. The birth of social justice warriors and things like that. We see it left and right. And a lot of men are just plain and simply lost because they haven't been given the skillset. They don't understand like there is a draw here and I don't know what is appropriate and what isn't. And they get to have that on some level, whether it's in a bikini bar or through OnlyFans

and like that entry point, it satisfies a certain need that isn't met through porn, that isn't met through any of these other avenues or Playboy magazine or any of these things, you know, like where you read the article. I mean, that was it. That's what made Playboy Playboy was the articles. If you wanted better porn, you'd go to Penthouse or Hustler. Like Playboy was it because of the fact that yes, you had better looking women, but more

importantly than that, you got to understand things. You got to learn things. You get to read about sports and read about women and read about what made people tick. And I think it was that intelligence that was the draw. Yeah. And I think to both of you are in Jade's points about, you know, how this is all kind of coalescing with what we're doing on our platform on OnlyFans. There's this big missing gap that is really men are in our culture kind of taught to be afraid of intimacy with themselves and women as women, especially if you have some consciousness around this,

you can be like Jade was saying, the portal or the Oracle for him to be able to connect with his own intimacy with self. And that's the big piece, the missing pieces that, you know, our friend Godsey talks about this a lot, but I know the work that all three of us do is largely about introspective work and really figuring out what our daemon or, you know, what we're called to do, our dharma is here on this planet. You get lost in the glorification of busyness in our culture, you know, and I think that's what's happening for a lot of men and a lot of women that are also living in their masculine, which has definitely been me. So I think this venture of ours is really bridging the gap from being the person who maybe, like I said, glorifies busyness or just distracts himself or uses addictions and ways of escape to slow down a little bit, connect. And if using Jade and I as the bridge for that, or whoever else is Kyle for the bridge of that, so that you can finally cross over into yourself, essentially. It's really about that introspective work. And it's really about pulling that. And that's what we were noticing. That was what I was getting to is that like,

we noticed that men were starting to have a safe place to remove the mask, to like set the mask down. And that's when we started to discuss having the workshop and it being a place where, you know, men are coming, the mask is down and we're teaching them all of the things that basically turn us on, which is all things that have to do with embodying the inner king, so. Like, I want to see a vacuum in your hands.

I want to see those dishes done when I get home. I mean, sometimes it's some of that because it is about polarity. We're going to teach about polarity and why that creates passion in a relationship. We're going to teach about the different sexual energies, masculine and feminine, and how to embody those better and be more agile. So there is some of that, like who is going to play the role in your house. And it's largely about creating a plan for direction as well. Like, well, where do you want your life to go? Do you want to be the masculine role for the better part of your life? And if so, then let's put that together and figure out how to get there. Yeah. Yeah. Clarity is such an important piece. And we just haphazardly slap on our parents, you know, as like, this was the model that I grew up

with. And then, you know, when, when things are, when you start butting heads, you know, three years into a relationship or a year and a half in, and you're like, Hey, this isn't, this isn't what I signed up for. And, and, and the other person saying the same thing is you're not who I signed up for. And my parents did it differently than your parents did. But the, the assumption of this is how it's going to be without having first clarified, like what is, what, what did it look like for us growing up and what's right and what's wrong about that? Or maybe that's not even the best way, you know, like just, um, questioning. Yeah. What, what do we, the self

reflection of that? Like, what can we take from that? That was awesome and worked and bring that to our relationship and what, what didn't serve our parents in the longterm that we don't need and not make the assumption that this is how a nuclear family works or an open family or any of these other things, but to get curious about that and actually have that conversation. And to your point, Jade, I think it's such a, it's a huge piece in honoring the feminine to understand that that wisdom does exist there, you know? And when we, when we get out of the, the mask of I'm in the

driver's seat, I make the decisions, I do all the things and surrender some of the responsibility and surrender the steering of the ship, we can find that there, oh yeah, this, this mirror to me can see all this shit in my shadow and my rear view that I don't have access to. And you've also brought up to me before that when a man struggles to trust the wisdom of his feminine, it's because he doesn't trust his own feminine. He's not in touch with his own feminine. So that's also something that we're going to cover

in the workshop as well, is getting men in touch with that feminine side. Or sometimes they're over identified with it even. And it's in a place, I think a lot of the men that we attract to our sphere, especially me because I know I live in the masculine a lot of the time are men who have over an overactive feminine

and an underactive masculine and it's about getting to a more balanced place and I don't like to use the word balanced because it's not about being 50-50 as you know but more agile place where they can really be what we call energetically agile and move between those two and be conscious of when they want to enact that more masculine nature or that more feminine softer side yeah and

it's different for everyone you know we've we're we're super close with our friends alex and sarah and they've had they've been on the podcast would have no problem stating this so it's not like i'm fucking outing them here. But Alex definitely has more of the feminine qualities in terms of being an intuitive and a creative. He likes to give birth to ideas and doesn't like to finish those jobs. And he understands that about himself in business

as well as in their family structure. And Sarah wears the pants. She doesn't boss them around or anything like that, but she's structured. She can remember things. She's very organized intellectually and she can create systems and has done so. She wrote a whole system with Paul Cech. She co-authored it on their women's program. So she embodies that very well. And because they both recognize that in each other and appreciate that about each other and don't try to change it to fit some sort of fucking social norm. They operate amazingly well, you know, and like that, that's, that's a possibility for some people. But again, it's

not that, you know, when we speak about the feminine, it's important to recognize there's a shadow and a light side to everything. Right. So, uh, what I see in young men today or adolescents who may be 30 or 40, but are still in adolescence is, you know, we see shadow masculine and shadow feminine. And the honor of those is to step into the light side of both of those to recognize they exist within ourselves and then recognize those truths within our partner as well. Yeah, absolutely. And so much of it is about that shadow work and looking at the dark places, which I think, again, in our culture, we're just not taught to be able to hold, first of all.

And then we're not taught to explore there because instead it's find the silver bullet, find the magic pill to make it go away, find the addiction, whether it be porn or drugs or alcohol or whatever other escapism, shopping for women a lot of the time, that's going to allow us to not even have to look there. And so when you have, especially in relationship, which is what I think Jade and I are offering to the people in our lives generally, but also to especially men and OnlyFans, is that ability to

sit with someone who's ready and willing to do the work. And yes, you are going to pay us to do that work. It's a mutually beneficial exchange, just like with any other therapy modality you might use in the world. Doing that is the magic, like showing up for that calling, you know, if you want to call it that, showing up for that modality that you said, you know what, this does speak to me. And I feel like I'm, I'm, I'm willing to face my fear here because it feels like a safe enough place where I'm used to this place enough that I'm willing to go like touch it and just see what's there. I think that's what's needed. And that's what we've really identified in that space is like, these men

are comfortable going into, let's call it strip clubs or going to porn sites or going, you know, working with sex workers in that way and paying money for it. Okay. We understand that. Are they willing to sit there, get in with that and be like, okay, maybe I had the orgasm, you know, I jerked off, I had the orgasm, whatever. But like, she's asking me some interesting questions that I haven't thought about. Now that I'm in this space that I already feel kind of comfortable, maybe I can play here. Like maybe I can see what's going on. And the craziest thing is that now that we're launching this course, so many men have signed up and we were like, we didn't know exactly what to expect. It would really follow all the way

through. And we're here now. We're like, shit, this was really needed. Like this is actually working. So it's just been a beautiful little ride of getting here. And I feel like now we have a real platform to, to do this work for the men that are called to it. So I'm excited. I'm really excited about it. Absolutely. Well, let's, let's talk about the King. You know, a conversation that I had with Jade not long ago. And I, and I had to, I was like, damn it. Is this true? Cause he told, you brought something up. You were like, I think it was Jung or one of Jung's understudies that said that you don't really step into your King until you're in your forties.

Well, he says up until then, you're just doing research basically. Yeah. And so I asked Godsey and he was like, yep, Jung actually said that. And, you know, his recommendation was that you, you did all the things, you know, and that you, you know, you fed the ego, you started a family, you would go out and try to make a bunch of money and, you know, exercise all these other parts of life that are a part of the same wheel. And from there, begin to fine tune and then step into being a king. And then later on in life, you would be a sage, you know, if you continued on that path. When I was with Paul Cech out for the mandala workshop out in San Diego, he was talking about the same thing.

He's like, I work with so many young people that are, you know, asking me like, Paul, how long should I fast for? And, you know, I'm practicing asceticism and sperm retention and all this shit. And he's like, you're 20 years old, bust a nut, go out, do the, do the, live your fucking life, you know, and, and, and get to a certain point where, I mean, you're learning this from an 80 year old man who did all that, you know, like who lived a full life and then decided I can have renunciation. Then decided I can practice fasting and silent retreats and things like that. And so much of that. Oh God, my phone's on.

Lo siento. So much of that. Yeah. What a clown. It's just, I bring that up because it's important to recognize where people are at. And obviously you guys know this already. You're going to have everyone from probably teenagers all the way up to 50 year olds who are on their second or third marriage that need to work with this. And, you know. We got to meet them where they're at. Exactly. And we're all trying to step into our King and that you know, we got to meet them where they're at. Exactly. And we're

all trying to step into our King and that's never, um, there's no top of the mountain there. The most important thing I think for both Jade and us has been this, this shame portion where men and women generally carry so much freaking shame around, especially around sexuality. We're not good enough. We're not going to be performing properly and in all aspects of life really we want to be these perfectionists we're able to intellectualize so much of it so we think well if we can understand it why aren't we there yet why aren't we there yet and then we berate ourselves for not being there yet and like you're saying Kyle it's like you have to go through the experiential piece too and yeah it probably takes till you're around 40 to really feel like you got a lot of that under the, under, you know, in your, on your tool belt. But at 40, you, what happens? Midlife

crisis. Why? Because the guy figures out, holy shit, I've been doing it wrong all along. He needs to have a, almost a, you know, a burning down of the self or a dark night of the soul, as we like to call it and rise from the ashes of whoever he was actually meant to be on this planet. So we're hoping to help men through that journey, the journey to the throne. Yeah, absolutely. Meeting them wherever they're at. I'll go to about the sex piece because it is,

it is such an important part. And you know, you guys mentioned this early on, like there's nothing wrong with, with sex sales. That's just, that's just part of the game. For some reason,

when, when there's money attached to it, when it's free, it didn't seem to be as shamed. But once women are charging for it, all of a sudden, a bunch of people are shaming them. That's what's so interesting

because it's like, then they're classified as a sex worker or something. And then we have a taboo around the word sex work. Like, why are we okay with paying for any kind of psyche work, but not anything to do with our sex, not anything to do with the physical body.

If it's massage or something like that, it's okay. But when it turns into a happy ending, it becomes something else. And we have to start questioning ourselves, like, why do we feel that way? Where did that paradigm come from? And is it time to replace it with something else? I think it is. Well, most of our, you know, our culture is so much of religious programming of like flesh is bad. Gouge your eye out before you lust after a woman, things like that, you know?

But I know- A lot of blind dates in the world. Don't masturbate. Like that could be the worst thing ever. But yeah, that's the, I think, I know for me, a lot of, yeah, like our, a lot of it is our parents shaming our sexuality. I know it's not so much the norm now, but for me, I carried so much sexual shame just by the, you know, the abuse in my home. And then, you know, when I was molested, being told I enjoyed it, like I just carried the shame

that had to do with anything with sexual pleasure. And so it's been like twofold for me because part of me starting an OnlyFans and then this workshop with men has been healing like healing my shame and then also trying to remove the shame and the men that are coming here as well you know because even if someone comes with a fetish that sounds random instead of shaming them for it where where we may not accept the job invitation, but we see it as an opportunity to heal whatever trauma is there, you know, because typically that is the opportunity with fetishes too, you know. And not even just healing, but just to hear it out. Like I think getting a fetish off your chest is so freaking critical because it doesn't always have to be this where we go into the psychology of it, where we have to go into healing mode and fixing mode, because

then we're obviously way deep in the magician archetype, right? If that's what they're there for and they show up for that work, sure. We're there for that. Like we're, we're ready. But if it's about, Hey, I have this thing, like, what do you think about it? Just not being like, Oh my God, is that really what you're into? And not shaming them is such a healing moment for a person who's never been able to say something like that about them. That's that, you know, one of their shadows

out loud and let it be held. Because I think that's one of the reasons why they're drawn to OnlyFans is because they can be anonymous because they've been shamed in the past, you know? And I know for me, one of the reasons why I was able to start my OnlyFans is because you helped remove the shame around it too.

You were one of the first people that I talked to about it. And one of my, besides the financial gain of being able to put my kids through Montessori, one of the main things for me was wanting to merge sexuality and spirituality and using that as a platform to do so. And I feel that when, you know, they are separate, that's when there's shame there. That's when it comes out in

dysfunctional ways. And that's when, because I have from a lot of people, when it comes to my OnlyFans, whether it's friends or family, a lot of the thing is like, well, but you, you're so passionate about ending sex trafficking. How can you be in that industry? And what I feel people don't see is that the sex trafficking and all of that, it comes when it's not merged with spirituality because it's coming out in those dysfunctional ways

and there's shame there. And so my goal on OnlyFans and with this workshop as well is to heal the duality and the judgment between the two. But there's a lot of the shame I feel like isn't just the fetishes, but it's, I don't know about you, Kyle, cause you're very open with all this, but like a lot of men are even like ashamed that they masturbate, you know, like there's just so much shame around all things sexual. And porn addiction has been one of the big topics that come up in the DMs. They're like, Hey, I've, you know, I've really struggled with this thing because, and I'll just say that

because we invite them to this work on our free social media platforms, they already go into our only fans. Like the ones who are ready to do work, they come in hot, like, Hey, I have this thing. I want to talk about, I'm too ashamed to go to a counselor somewhere else and talk face to face, you know, something like that. And so they open the conversation there. And a lot of men come and talk about porn addiction and how it affects them in relationship with women. Because of course, when you're, you know, jerking off into a napkin in a closet, you

know, and trying to not get caught by your mom as a teenager, then you end up, you know, watching porn any second you can in the public restroom at school or whatever, you know, all these ways that men create this, this pattern of how they get to orgasm quickly. Then they go be with a woman. It's going to be a big difference, you know, being with a woman and no one has shown them how to slow themselves down or like what we call masturbate like a king so that they can make that transition a lot easier. And you end up with 40 year old men who are still not only masturbating like a teenager, but also making love like a teenager and not understanding where the gap, where the miss is happening. Yeah. Jamie will talked about that. I think he was on a year and a

half ago. His book just came out, recapture the Rapture. There's a longer title than that, but I am forgetting it right now. But he was talking about that, you know, like you're a little boy and you got to rub one out as quick as you possibly, A, you want to rub one out quickly, but B, like you're up against the shot clock, you know, like you don't know who's going toge through the door that kind of thing um and and that pattern sticks you know and there's a disconnect then with with well especially too like we watch porn we don't know what what drugs or chemicals they're on to be able to do that plus they're fucking all day long so it's like it's actually hard for them to finish and you think of like how how can a dude on camera pound away and not get tired? Which also brings up dick size shame as well,

because most of the dicks they're seeing in porn are pretty large. And most men think their dicks are fine until they see porn dicks. Yeah, then you see like a Jason Ellis and you're like, oh man, oh man, I got work to do. I'm so far behind. Yeah, it's an important one.

The piece on control, self-control, and then pleasing, that's a big one. I've have a couple of, you know who they are, Jade, and I'm obviously not gonna mention names here, but I have talked about this before on podcasts where I have, and this is true of a lot of men, and I'm sure you guys have brushed it, but I want, I want you guys to talk about this, um, where they're a married couple and the guy will shut

down anytime there's any advice given on slowing down or trying this stroke or trying a different movement with the tongue, you know, for, for, know, for eating out and things like that. It's like, if I'm not, if there's any, it's taken as criticism rather than like, hey, this is what my body wants right now in this moment. You know, and that's such a huge missing piece is there's so many men that shut down the second they get any type of cues,

they assume as criticism and take it on as a, as a, you know, they identify with that. Like, oh, you don't like the way that I munch your box. You don't like the way that I have sex. You don't like the way that I do X, Y, and Z, as opposed to just saying like, this is, oh, okay. Like I, if I listen to this, I'll cross the finish line and help you reach orgasm much faster than me just, you know, figuring it out on my own. Like I should want to listen to that, but it blows my mind how many men and married men have trouble dropping their guard and actually listening to their partners on what is the way in which you desire me right now in this moment. There's a lot there. I mean, there's this part also from the woman's perspective, you know, that we kind of get shown that we're not supposed to ask for too much or need too much. So asking for our needs, therefore, in the middle of us.

We're also used to our body basically being used as like a have to cut through if we're trying to get conscious about this type of thing. And yeah, it starts with, first of all, asking why did I feel offended when she tried to tell me how I like it, you know, how she likes it, you know, what position she likes, or if I would stop jackhammering her, you know, like why was I so offended and triggered by that?

Like start asking ourselves that question and then be willing to come up against a cognitive dissonance. Like this is the thing, everyone listening to this, like if we can stand in that fucking hot ass fire, that is what it feels like for someone to say you're wrong without saying you're wrong in so many words. When we feel that fear come up of like, oh my God, I did something wrong or I'm doing something wrong or she's telling me I'm doing something wrong. Or I'm not good enough the way I am. Not enough.

Yeah. Just not enoughness. All that pain that comes up with that, if you can recognize it in the moment, then you can ask for the slowdown. And that's the critical thing that you need. It's the mindfulness gap you need in order to like take a breath and be like, okay, let me consider how I respond here instead of just like reacting from this, you know, fear-based place of just, I'm going to run away from this or you're wrong. I'm right. You know, or I'm, I'm good enough. Like, how dare you say that to me? And you look at your chick and she's like, whoa, what the fuck? I didn't, but what I just said, I didn't say anything about you. What an intimacy killer too killer too though like for a woman to

try to express something that she wants in the bedroom and for it to be taken that way you know I think for me one of the sexiest things you might laugh but like one of the sexiest things to me is when a man is so like because it takes such bravery and courage to ask a woman what she likes you know because then there's the feeling of like, well, what if I don't do it right, even after she tells me, you know, and then it also takes so much bold bravery and courage to, to like, this is the part I think you might laugh at, is to like sit in front of her and like, I don't know why this is so hard for certain men, at least in my past, to just make eye contact with her during intimacy. Eye contact.

And then like some of the best, most, almost like I feel like I touched God's sex was after like the man led me through breath work. That takes so much, to me, takes so much bravery and courage because you're like having to be fully vulnerable lead and know that you might mess up or she might not like it, or she might think it's weird. And then like, I remember, I keep thinking you're going to laugh at what I'm saying. No, this is dope. I remember, um, I'm taking notes. I remember a guy saying something along the lines of like, every flower is different, but I just want to learn how to like nurture your garden. So he was like, what he wanted me to do is he wanted, he basically wanted me to like masturbate in front of him and him just watch so that he could see exactly how to do it.

And like exactly what worked for me. And then it made all the difference. So it's like, but that had to take so much bravery from both of y'all too. Yeah. Curiosity, you know, like,

like the, the, to slow things down and to just get curious and to know that even a student. Yeah. Yes. Yeah. Curiosity, you know, like, like the, the, to slow things down and to just get curious and to know that even a student. Yeah. Yes. Yes. And that's such a big piece, you know, because who knows everything? Like why, why, why do we need to feel like we, we know it all, you know? So yeah, go ahead. But yeah, to be a student is such an important piece, especially in the bedroom. Yeah. There's there's the piece I was just going to add is like there's, we, for some reason, have that idea.

And I know I've mentioned this many times, but like we have an idea that when we finish school, we're done, I'm done. I have so many friends that are like, right when we got done with college, it was like, yeah, I was like, I'm fucking never reading another book again. And I was like, really?

You know, and they're, of course course they've gone on to read books and things like that since the statements. And that was likely just in the, in the wake of college. But there's a lot of people I run into. I mean, I get a lot of questions online too. And I'm sure you guys do as well, where they're like, oh, I want to read as many books as you guys do. And it's like, well, Hey, I mean, I'm, I made it my job to read, you know, like I made it my job to learn. You guys are the same way. And so, and obviously, you know, like you have, you guys have had Charles Eisenstein on, I'm thinking of him right now. He was, he's on Aubrey's Today right now. Yeah. And I was in town and his books are phenomenal.

I want to read those books for me first and foremost, but yes, if I ever get him on the show, when I get Eisenstein on the show, like I'm for sure going to have to reread those books because of that. So it's a different thing, but all that to say, like there there's, there's two ends of the spectrum. There is the, I'm finished. I've got it all. And I'm just going to do my job and fucking pay the bills and enjoy life. And then there is the, the hungry student that, that may be a professor that may be a teacher and a coach, that may be a podcaster or anything else or may just go to their nine to five,

but they're curious, the curiosity remains. And so through that spectrum- It's that quote, like, keep me away from the one that knows all the answers. Is it roomy? Which is something like, keep me far away from the person that knows all the answers.

I want to be around the people asking questions. I think it's roomy, something like that. That sounds like roomy. Yeah. Yeah, so that's interesting you bring it up, Kyle, because I never even thought really about how some people just don't really want to learn anymore because they relate it to school

and something that probably wasn't fun for them. Well, and with learning comes change. Yeah, but my mom went to school literally my whole life. Like she's still like, what class can I take this semester? Like she's been in college my whole freaking life. She did eventually graduate with a bachelor's and all that, but she's now like, now she wants to study all the other subjects. So it was obviously not fallen far from the tree. But to me, that was like, that's normal. You know? Cause again, like you were saying earlier, the way our parents do it is the way we end up doing it. Hopefully just a molecule better. Right. And, and that's fair enough. And some people, I think that they are going to live

a, uh, one of the guests we just had on called it a vacation life for some people. And it's going to feel like that's the, you know, that's what the square, the, the, the box they're going to live in. They know it it's comfortable. They don't have to hit any edges and that's the, you know, that's what the square, the, the, the box they're going to live in. They know it, it's comfortable. They don't have to hit any, you know, edges and that's going to be their life. And that's totally cool. Like, Hey, these people need to exist too. There are going to be, however, people probably listening to this podcast right now, because if they're called to your work, Kyle, I know they are in this growth mindset who want to explore there. They're just not even sure how, because it does come with some yucky stuff when you talk about textbooks and thinking of reading some of this really, really

dense stuff that's out there. And then when you start reading it, if you get called to the wrong book, sometimes it just turns you off it. You're like, I don't want to do this. I don't know how these people are doing this, but hey, that's why you have a podcast, kind of put it into a more manageable and digestible format. So I think, I don't know, like as we come to this work, it's like, what calls to you, like getting slowing down again, like I'm going to say that over and over slowing down. I think that's what we all need to hear, but slowing down and feeling when you listen to a podcast or you read a book or you watch a Ted talk or whatever it is, like what actually feels good in your body to, to play with? And are you meeting your edge? Are you like getting out there and feeling a little bit of discomfort and then recognizing whether that

discomfort or anxiety that arises when you approach a new subject is actually a, uh, a no, or just the anxiety because it's something new. So is it no, or is it new is the way I would say that, right? Like, is this a no, or is this new? And then if it's just new information, fucking dive all the way in. We need that stuff. Absolutely. It makes us have that full spectrum life.

Like we get to know more that we get to feel more. Yeah. That's something that I've always felt with, certainly with things that I'm passionate about. So if I learn something and I'm passionate about, like the more beautiful world our hearts know is possible. Like you read that book and you're like, fuck yeah. It's not doom and gloom.

It's awesome. The teachings Eisenstein brings forward are so much of what I've viscerally felt through my own plant medicine experiences and talking with native elders and things like that. And it's like, it's a book that grabbed me. And when you read a book that grabs you or you listen to a podcast that grabs you, it, it lights up that little fire a little bit more.

It fans those flames and that makes you feel young. You know, it makes you feel alive. And I think that they're, the work that you guys are doing and have been preparing for is so awesome because you have the opportunity to fucking light people's fires back on, you know, not just for the passion of sex and things like that. That's certainly a big one and it shouldn't be downplayed. Like how important that is. It is fucking important, you know, um, the joys of life. Yeah. That's our goal is to be that bridge because a lot of the people on our only fans, they typically wouldn't as majority of

them wouldn't be listening to a podcast like this. So this is one way that they would come to the work that they otherwise wouldn't is like through this Trojan horse. Yeah. Yeah. And you know, Kyle, when you were on our episode and we explored your threesome, we had, you know, so much fun there with the sexy piece of it. And we featured that in a lot of, well, I featured it in a skit where I was in the 80s and all that. And that, that was one of my most popular videos because I was touching the sexuality piece, but able to bridge it into, well, listen to this podcast with Kyle, who is willing to cry on camera and get into an actual intimacy with himself. You know what I mean? Dudes have, a lot of dudes have not ever

even thought that that was possible or okay. And definitely held shame around it. So, I mean, certainly people like you are, are just helping absolve shame around what it means, the real meaning of what it is to be a man finally. So I'm just glad that we're in this circle and we're playing in this realm with men now. I think it's pretty rad. Like seeing it unfold is pretty rad. It is. It is. And it's been rad to watch you guys unfold.

So good. Talk about some of the other important pieces of being a king and what you hope to help guys with. And you can even just start. I know that's a fucking loaded question. Perhaps start with what is being brought to you guys. You know, what are some of the things that are being brought to you guys outside of sex? I love, I'll just, I know that's a fucking loaded question. Perhaps start with what is being brought to you guys. You know, what are the, some of the things that are being brought to you guys outside of sex? I love, um, I'll just, I'll, I'm going to just touch on the, the idea that Robert Moore really puts forward with why we, um, call it a King in the first place. I think a lot of

men are kind of turned off by that grandeur, you know, title and they're like, King, I don't know if I want to be a King, but the King and, and Kyle, you know, and I know you talk on your show a lot about this, you know, you've interviewed a God see about the archetypes as well. So you play in this world a lot. And I'm about, I'm sure a lot of your followers already are experienced in this, but that King that we're calling in with awakening the King within, you know, our, our, our workshop is really about figuring out all the parts of your psyche, essentially, that you have kind of disembodied with. Maybe some of them you have severed completely, probably through trauma when you were a young person, and you kind of let

go of those archetypes. And like you mentioned the book, King, Warrior, Magician, Lover, you know, maybe you've let go of parts of who you were because it wasn't safe to be those when you were growing up. As you bring them online though, and as you can recognize where you've been doing that and you've been heightening other parts of your archetype and being maybe too much of a, you know, tyrant here as the warrior, you may have been, you know, the lover and been too soft and not had any boundaries. And that's why you don't have respect from people and you're struggling with these things through life. Well, as you can kind of become aware of those parts of yourself that are not

aligned, you can bring them back into alignment, bring them back online. Dan Angle actually is a person who I think may, I don't know if it just catalyzed this term for me or if you even said it out loud, but it catalyzed for me when I was talking to him, but I call it remembering. So we're remembering the different members or archetypes in ourselves. And as we do that, we're literally remembering who we are, what we're here to do. And, and so the King or queen that we actually already are, and just remembering that causes us to finally take the throne as the sovereign who can see the different parts of us that want to play, but he has the discernment to put the lover on the throne and say, let's go into this soft place and be vulnerable here and do this work with this guy in the forefront or take the warrior and let's, you know, fight the battle because there's something that seriously needs to be, you know, acted on here.

And having that kind of discernment and awareness is what my deepest hopes are with this, um, this new venture and with our only fans. So that's kind of where I will start with the King. I know, Jade, you want to talk on the piece? Yeah, I know for me, the number one thing that like turns me on when it comes to a king is someone that lives his life in service for others. That's like so king-like to me. That's something that I know that you do, something that I know Tom Shadyac does. And I know I project my king a lot onto you guys,

but I also know that knowing you guys and being alongside for your journey is why I was able to do this workshop. So I use you guys as examples, but also like she said, like you guys are willing to cry when you talk about things that you love or things that have moved you. Also the willingness to be on the growth path. I know like it doesn't need to be constantly pushing your edge. I know we've learned to balance that out, but being on that growth path where you're actively looking inward. And then we polled like hundreds of women on what they found like most attractive in a man when we were trying to figure out how to like, you know, organize our calls for the workshop. And we listed all types of things like success, money, status, attractiveness, health, like all

these things. And then number one, it was pretty much like unanimous trait that like most women wanted in their man was integrity. So like a man of integrity, which is just like the integrated self, you know, like moving into those four pieces being like. The archetypes. Yeah. Yeah. As a, and, and you know, integrity is such a freaking big word. It can be, it can mean so much to so many different people, but that idea of being able to be present with who you're with, that idea of being able to be, have a direction and Dharma and know it, you know, which means you have to have done a lot. Dedicated to a mission. Yeah. Work to get to that place in the first place and, and integrative work to, to get there in the first place and then to be able to stay on track with that and persevere.

Um, and like she was saying, like meet your edge and know it. And another thing too, that's such a attractive trait for me and a king is like the ability to hold a safe container for whatever your woman is bringing to the moment, whether that's in the bedroom or out of the bedroom, just that safe container where she's able to let it out, you know? And then to me also, when I think of integrity, it's like doing what you say you're

going to do, but also, and this is something that I've always had with you and with Shadiac, as well as a lot of others in our circle, when you say something, there's nothing in me that I feel like, is that true? You know, like I can just, yeah. Which is, goes with the safe container. Yeah. Yeah. That safe container reminds me, Aubrey, you know, wrote a poem, I think four or five years ago on the mountain, you know, a man is a mountain and I don't have it memorized, but I've always thought of that mountain energy as such an important piece to the masculine when it's in its fullness. And a big part of that is all of the archetypes blended,

like the loving energy that can hold all things, the safety that the warrior creates through boundary setting and serving of the higher ideal of the kingdom that the king has set forward. And that the magic of that, the magician of the mountain energy is something that can hold all things from all weather.

It always stands there. It's always the given safety net, the grounding cord for the feminine to express itself through the highs and lows, the ebbs and the flows, the lunar cycle and everything in between. And if we haven't done our own self-reflection and our own integration and our own self-work as men, there's no fucking way that we're going to be unwavering. You know, like, I mean, there's been times, I mean, and I say this, I'm not saying this as like,

I'm the expert mountain guy. I've been flailing all over the fucking place. I've been out at the stormy seas, you know, the solo cast on, uh, you know, my 17 days with, with Bufo medicine. Um, no doubt. I haven't always been the mountain and Tasha's carried the squad on her back and held, and she's held the masculine at times. And that's been awesome. And at the same time, through the bulk of our relationship, I've been able to hold that mountain energy. And, and, you know, it's cool that you see that and lump me in with Tom Shadyak because he's fucking mad. You can lump me in with him anytime. Yeah, you guys are really speaking to so much of,

you know, what is missing? You know, we talk about these things like from a societal piece. And I mean, I could probably do like a five hour episode on just the book, The Madness of Crowds alone and King Warrior Magician alone. And there's gentle ways to proceed with that information. But as we spoke about before,

there's a lot of adolescents dressed in adult meat suits. Right now, I think there's never been a more important time to do this kind of work with men and to hear it from women too, because that bridges the gap, right? And I think obviously men need other men. That's so important. But having two women lead this course, it's like we're letting them into our psyches and they're getting a perspective on these things, all of these topics in a way that's going to help them relate to women and be able to do the big work with the women in their lives. Yeah. That's such a critical part. I mean, as you know, with your relationship

with Tosh, like, or even your relationship with Jade, you know, like the women in your life, they show you such a different perspective that you just cannot access a different way. And, you know, I don't want to like put all the pat ourselves on our, on the back or anything, but I think we're ready to do this work. Like we have literally been in, in training for it, if you will, for our whole lives, just the, the upbringings that we both have kind of have directed us towards this path. And it feels really like we are in our Dharma right now. Yeah. And not to say that you're not like the medicine man, cause you very much are, but I know I told you about that ceremony where, um, like I saw you, all the work you were doing, you were out like constantly in

the healing work, fit for service, every, all of the things that you do, your coaching calls, your podcast, and all of the ceremonies that you're actively showing up to, you're like always in the work. You're like very much like medicine to the world. But then I also saw like Tasha in the background, like maintaining it for you. You know, she was like keeping the house running, keeping it together, being your grounding cord so that you could go do all that medicine. And so I was seeing that like, even though you are the one out there doing it and showing up to the ceremonies that she is very much like the medicine woman. And even though she's not at ceremonies, because her life is very dedicated to Wolf right now, which is such important work, she is pretty

much doing all of those ceremonies through being your grounding cord when you get home and your safe place to come home and process and integrate with her. So I think that piece missing for any man, I know not to say that a single man can't do all the work, but that adds so much. Synergy, right? It's like something you can't access on your own. And that's something we want to teach them how to allow in their lives and also how to attract

because I'm sure a lot of the men are going to be single. So, yeah, absolutely. There was a workshop that Godsey did out in Tulum at one of the, I think it was the first one of year two in Fit for Service. And they weren't using me as a coach for that event. So I was just a fly on the wall at all the coaches' workshops. And I went and sat with him. And one of the things he guided people to do was to envision and journal first, but meditate on it and then journal yourself as an old man or an old woman. And then, you know, think of all the qualities they have, all of their accomplishments,

who's around them, what does their life look like? How do they feel inside? Are they anxious? Do they feel peace? You know, any of these things and really envision that and then start to backtrack that to yourself right now and eliminate the things that, I mean, what do you have to sacrifice now to become that person? And it's such a brilliant workshop for me personally, right? And I started to think about that in different ways. And one of the first places I saw that was in relationship because so many times we go through a relationship where however long it lasts, whether it's two weeks or 15 years, we get to a point where we realize it's just not going to work. And we think like, I fucking wasted all this time. I invested all this energy and money and blah, blah, blah.

And it's like, that whole thing was fine tuning. If you allow it to be, that whole thing was fine tuning and sharpening the blade for you to call in the person in which you're going to spend the rest of your life with the one that does work. And if you look at it that way and you start to evaluate that, that's like seeing yourself as the 80-year-old man or the 80-year-old woman, right? Who is it that I'm going to grow old with? What characteristics do they have? What is it about them and about us that is different from any relationship I've ever been in. And then with what you guys are talking about, the self-reflection piece and the mirroring that you guys are offering to men

is what's necessary to see, oh, I'm not gonna have that person unless I can match that, right? Like I don't get to call in a 10 on every level, not just looks, but all the other levels. I don't get to be that unless I step up myself to that level and have that mirrored back to me.

And I think that's the beautiful thing about the work that you guys are doing and offering is that you give men the opportunity to self-reflect from the mirrors that are your lovely selves. And then from there, they can start to really get clear on what it is, what type of relationship they're calling in and start to let spirit source that for them. I think this will be the first time for a lot of men that they're able to be in a place that doesn't hold shame over them. And hear that they're worthy of that.

Yeah. And that that's allowed, that they're deserving of the life that they can dream up. It's just a matter of getting to a place for them to believe that. And my guess too, is most of the men signing up, I feel like I'm shooting all over our list of attendees, but most of the men signing up, my guess would be what David Data would call like the nice guy,

the nice guy that tends to get walked all over or may end up falling in the more codependent category or friend zoned. Yeah. So we're trying to really instill in them their worth as Kings, that they already are Kings, that they just need to step forward to it. And that alone can be life-changing, you know? That's, that's a huge piece. It's funny. Cause I, you know, I haven't spoken about our trials and tribulations of open relationship in a long time on this podcast, but there was a point when Tosh first started dating Christian

where I became super clingy and I was just fucking caught up in fear of all the fears that we talked about on the podcast that I did with you guys. Is he bigger? Is he better? Are you going to leave me? All of these things.

And that clinginess is repulsive. It caused the very, it fucking caused the, it pushed her away with that amount of clinginess. And thankfully I only spent, you know, a short period of time in that space before I could recognize it. And her being an authentic mirror, let me know that like that, where's the confident, awesome fighter that I married, you know, like that, that's a different scenario. And I think for people to, to do the work offers them a different degree of self-worth. And when they have that self-worth, they can stand up and they don't need to puff their chest until, you know, their, their perspective ladies, like, Hey, this is what I do. This is how much money I make.

Look at my car, blah, blah, blah. It's none of that stuff. It's just knowing thyself. And from knowing thyself. Yeah, exactly. There's the confidence that's necessary for them to recognize that in that person. But there are so many, you know,

to understand that experientially, like in your body and to really embody that. Shit, I know for all of us sitting here, I can probably say that's taken a damn process to be able to access that knowingness. And sometimes that comes with needing to figure out the different labels or the different, um, systems, especially for me, you know, again, like that, that idea of like being able to intellectualize something, you got to do that first and then you do the experiential piece. And sometimes that comes with figuring out

how to label yourself as needy in the moment or, you know, we would call it anxiously attached or, you know, having that clinginess and becoming really insecure, you're experiencing what that side of the street looks like because you probably weren't like that in all other relationships. Maybe other ones, you were more on the avoidant side

and you pushed on the other side, or maybe you're more secure. You know, your open relationship brought up all that shit that you hadn't really looked at yet, right? But you probably called in. I mean, I know you already know this, but you probably called in open relationships so that all that could come up so that you could heal whatever wounds were behind it

so that you could step more into your worth. I know even for me, like in each relationship or in each friendship or each venture that we do, there's some feelings of unworthiness that come up every time. And I feel like each time I heal it a little bit more. And that's, I feel like there's like, of course, the other reasons why all of those things have come into my life, but they've all presented that opportunity. So I feel like that's partly why, because I know, I don't think, are you guys open now? No. Okay. So I feel like that was open since the birth of wealth. I think we're in large part done. We're down to play. It did. And that was, you know,

that's what I saw in February of 2018 in a mushroom ceremony. Like it's, you're not to wait for your kids to be older to do this so you can do it the rest of your life. It's not about that. It's not even about the sex. It's about growth and it's about healing. And it's, and it's the challenge that's going to allow you to be a better parent and a better husband and a better partner by walking through that fire. It's a really hard two year ceremony. Yeah. Oh yeah. And we all come to our work through different modalities. Obviously not everyone's going to be like, yeah, I'm going to do an open relationship suddenly. Please don't. Please don't.

It's fucking hard fire walk. It's probably the hardest walk. Yeah. But there's all kinds of ways that we're going to come to it. And it's just a matter of being open enough to allow that in. Yeah. And say yes. You know, like you guys continue to say yes.

What you're speaking to about this, this continued unfolding that you've had, every opportunity where you brush up against self-worth, you say yes to the opportunity. And then that reveals a little bit more. Brush up against resistance is really what it is for me. Like anywhere I see pain or resistance in me, I'm like, okay, why is this happening for me?

Instead of I'm a victim to this, why is this happening to me? And that's just really, if we can just shift that little bit, it turns on something inside of us. That's all of a sudden seeking for this to have a silver lining and this to have a meaning that opens you to so much more of what life is really all about, which is facing the challenge, meeting the edge, pushing forward, climbing the mountain and all that. I just had a Steven Pressfield on, he wrote the war of art and a number of other books, but war of art is what don't say. Wow. I,

the podcast was a wow. He is a bucket list guest and, um, I was doing it on, uh, Zencaster and my audio failed on my side. I'm working with their team right now to try to fix this situation. And if it gets fixed, then great. I will release that one shortly. If it doesn't get fixed, then I will fucking fly to LA for him because I absolutely love him. But that's something he talks about. I mean, War of Art is a book

that absolutely changed my life. It's under two and a half hours. And that's the thing that he talks about, whether you're a writer, any form of artist. And we're all artists in our own way. We should damn well be artists in our own families. We should be artists in our relationships with one another. Art is alchemy.

And there is that. There is resistance at every single turn. But when we say yes and we show up to that and we meet it frontally, head on, that's when we can see, okay, there's a benefit to saying yes to the challenge. There's a benefit to sitting with that. Even like your podcast not maybe working out. If it doesn't, I bet you'll tell yourself, okay, this must be happening for me and I got to just trust, you know,

and have a little faith. And maybe it makes you go to LA and who God knows what happens there. And that connects something. Yeah. You couldn't see from here. I think a lot of, you're saying, you're talking about saying yes.

A lot of healing worthiness is saying yes to receiving about saying yes a lot of um healing worthiness is saying yes to receiving like so many people who struggle with worthiness wounds they don't receive because they don't feel worthy of of it and i know for me even when i started to receive i noticed that i struggled to say thank you because saying thank you meant i had to acknowledge that i received something so one of the like my um relationship with you guys has been healing in so many different ways. Y'all introduced me to plant medicine. I mean, the list could go on, but one of the main things was so much healing my worthiness because Tosh is like one of the friends, and I have this with Mercedes too, that like you can just unfiltered, like speak it all and she'll sift it for you and she'll reflect back to you.

She feels that, you know, she's very honest and she'll, she'll hold, you know, she's a good accountability partner, but you guys, the both of y'all are two of the most generous, most giving people like anyone that comes in y'all's home feels like they belong here. And for someone who grew up my whole life feeling like I didn't belong anywhere, that was like one of the most healing things. But I remember maybe like a year in realizing like, man, I always leave their house forgetting to say thank you. And then I realized like, oh, it's because I, because like

y'all always cook dinner and we've been there 10 hours and you've helped discipline my kids. And then like, and then I realized like, oh, I didn't say thank you. And then I realized that I had a resistance to it. And I realized I have to acknowledge all that they gave me in order to say thank you, you know? So I feel like part of that saying yes is just saying yes to allowing someone to see your worth and allowing someone to give to you. And then also allowing yourself to give that back, you know, because you have something worthy to offer back, you know? So that's a big, I feel like part of the saying yes. Oh yeah. I say yes to that. I do say yes to that. It's not an approval for people listening. There's a lot of, there's a lot of yes going on with my head. Yeah. That's so important. It's so important. Not, not just to say yes and to show up but the ability to

to be in a state of receiving and allowing and the thank you I love yeah that's what I was well I was gonna say that there's this sorry too right we talk about sometimes we're so quick to say sorry because we already feel like we're a burden I think Sarah told me I have to give her a dollar every time I say sorry. Cause I say it so much, but that's true. Right? Like you, like we get into this mode like, Oh, I'm already going to be a burden. And so before I'm even, before I've even asked anything of someone, I know, I know so many women that are in this, they do this, you know, just, just and men as well. I know it with with my women friends especially that we're saying sorry before we've ever we're not burdening someone just because that they're interacting with us you know and that's culturally built in that's domesticated into us probably from

stories in our young life and we gotta question that shit and the only way we do is when sometimes a friend will tell you like hey you're saying sorry a little too much. And there's nothing to be sorry about here. It's like almost like I'm offended. Like, why are you so sorry? I want you here. Your presence is a gift, you know? Yeah. This is making me think of, I mean, look, sorry.

And ho'oponopono is a beautiful, I'm sorry. Please forgive me. I thank you. And I love you. Right. It's such a beautiful prayer and a beautiful thing to move through any circumstances, to circle back to that.

But I remember teaching, or not teaching, but learning from Dr. Mark Chang, who's been on the podcast before. He's a Jeet Kune Do instructor and one of my favorite people on the planet. And he was partnering us up and we had to learn Kali. It was like this stick fighting thing that we were doing. And I hadn't done it since my first coach in MMA, Vince Perez-Mazzola out in Arizona, shout out to my boy

VPM, who would teach me this stuff. And he was like, look, for some of you, this is brand new. There's no sorry. There's no sorry in this. Like you just, and I'm not saying there's not a time and a place for a true apology, but it was amazing how many times he had to repeat it. Do not say you're sorry. I want to see a change in behavior. A change in behavior is more important than apology, right?

And I think, and that stuck with me because it's like, ultimately, that's all we really want as well. I mean, as parents, it's like, don't fucking, don't tell me you're sorry again. Change your behavior. Like Bear always walks, that is one fucking little example,

but he always walks the dog food out and he walks it out. Like he doesn't care if it's going to fall over and he's holding it up all funny. And I'm like, buddy, you can't hold it like that. And I said, OK, sorry. You know, and I tell him that every day. And then this morning he lifts it up to show me over his head and half the container comes out right as we're about to leave for school.

And I was like, dude, you know, like I don't want sorry. I want behavior change. I want it to shift because that tells me more. It's a change in action tells me more than saying, I'm sorry. Yeah. Maybe we need to rephrase it to like, I get it. Yeah. Yeah.

I get it, dad. So what are some of the other things? I mean, we just hit an hour, but I feel like this conversation is so juicy and I love having you guys here and it's few and far between that I get to sit with people face to face right now. You know, even though Texas is back y'all and fuck these restrictions and no one's getting sick and there's still a 99.73% chance of surviving. So we shouldn't have been fucking locked down

in the first place. But since I have y'all here, let's keep the conversation going. Tell me about some of the other things that people are bringing to you. You know, fetishes was something that I fucking cracked up at because I was like, oh God,

you must be seeing like all the weird stuff come out. And then of course, you know, at the end of the day, there's nothing really that weird. It's just like, this is what, whatever turns you on, turns you on. There's nothing fucking weird about that other than what culture says is okay.

And what isn't, I think it's 16 states. Anal sex is still illegal. Oral sex is still illegal just because it's old laws that they haven't changed. I don't think anyone's 16 states. Anal sex is still illegal. Oral sex is still illegal. Just because it's old laws that they haven't changed. I don't think anyone's enforcing that. Hopefully not. They're going to bust down the door and be like, you were having butt sex.

You're going to jail. Let me check your butthole. Does that mean that being gay is illegal still? I'm pretty sure there's no one that can enforce that since you're federally allowed to be married. But if anal sex isn't allowed and you're a man with man, it's an issue. That would be an issue. Yeah.

And oral sex. If you're jerking each other off, that would get old real quick. I think for me, the number one fetish that I get, well, first of all, the most common fetish is feet, I feel like. We both have a wiki feet. It's got like 11 million followers on it. And like, uh, do people rate the pictures and stuff like that? Uh, we didn't build it. No, we didn't. Someone, someone did it in our name, but that's the most common fetish. Um, but the one that I get the most more than feet even is just the request to, for me to be peeing like in a certain position. There's always something different with the request, but it involves peeing. That's the most common one that I get that was surprising. Um, there's a lot of fetish. I think around like what you're speaking to Jade and not necessarily foot fetish, even though sometimes it does go

there, but, um, the peeing fetishes, and then dick rating. Oh, yeah. People really want dick ratings. Interestingly, it seems they want to be- That takes balls. Yeah. I wouldn't have the courage to show my hard penis. Well, they're paying you to praise it, basically.

Oh, okay. They want you to be kind. They don't want an authentic answer. I think sometimes they want some sort of diminishing answer, some sort of derogatory thing happening where it's like um with you know i don't know i maybe i'm reading too far into it but the point is like the cuckold porn where the guy whimpers in the corner while his wife gets hammered by mandingo by you yes but the thing about fetish and and i know because you've had some people on your show that talk

about this is like it's really beautiful how it brings to light so much of the stuff that we all our shadows live in our sexual fetishes like ask how it brings to light so much of the stuff that we all our shadows live in our sexual fetishes like ask yourself yeah fetish has so much dense well there's so much power behind it for healing i feel i mean and we we also had one guy that wanted to hey he wanted us to beat him up and he wanted he was going to pay us a thousand dollars per broken bone. So. Damn son. Yeah. Um, listen, just blindfold your eyes and you'll cut me in on a third and we'll make some money. How many bones are in the human body? 206. That's a very masochistic example. But no matter what she brought up earlier, like it could be like they had a very masochistic example but no matter that she brought up earlier like it could be

like they had a very authoritative parent or something you know but like no matter what the fetish is that's brought to us and we don't we don't fulfill a lot of these requests but a lot of the fetishes that are brought to us or almost actually all of them we never shame anyone that like brings them to us because we again we want this to be like a safe place for them but we typically will discuss it yeah and even though we're not we may not fulfill it we typically will yeah discuss it to where it removes the shame from it yeah and then if they want to go further cool like if it's someone who hasn't delved all the way into why they have that fetish in the first place and they want to play there we go there if it's someone who just wanted to be be able to see if we would hold that fetish, you know, or get a reaction or get a reaction, whatever we'll,

we'll, we'll, we'll do the dance. Like we'll do the dance with them. It's not necessarily, we're not going to give their requests to them necessarily. Sometimes. I mean, if it's something I can feel good and sexy doing, and I feel subjectively sexy while doing it, I might, I might offer it. But the beautiful thing is when we're able to actually access those parts of people that they have not been able to say out loud, like we were talking about earlier and, and then be able to dig a little deeper and like, kind of see like, where does that tickle your mind? And like, why, and where do you remember that coming from originally? And some people really already understand it. And some are like, holy shit, this is revelationary.

You know, I don't know if revelationary is a word, but you know what I'm saying? Yeah. And then they get somewhere with that. And I get excited about it because I learned things about my own fetishes and my own stuff. Like, huh, I didn't put those pieces together

until I had these conversations with some of these men. And some of it, I think, I mean, I don't know. It depends on the fetish, but some of it is just a craving for polarity too. Like it doesn't sound like a fetish, but I love being commanded and like bossed around in the bedroom. And to me, that's like that craving for polarity. Like, you know, this masculine, like telling me what I have to do, even with my hair, you know, any of that. So it could be. It's a surrender, yeah.

Yeah, it helps me to surrender, yeah. Yeah, and so it depends on the man we're calling in. Some of them want that more, like we're saying, some of them are the nice guy or they categorize themselves as a nice guy. And that creates sometimes this craving for polarity where they may want to experience what it's like to be with a very authoritarian type like dictator or a woman. Maybe their mother was like this.

I don't know where they're healing from. But in a safe enough place where they get to do it like in a setting that we set for them or maybe they pay a dominatrix to come in and give them that experience. And now it's a safe enough place where they get to reenact essentially what happened in their young childhood where they were getting, you know, yelled at by their mother, whatever, and have orgasm at the end of it or experience it without the negative stuff. Yeah. And we had a guest on River Warring who's a sex worker, and she talked about how in a safe container where you have a safe word, you can reenact your sexual trauma with a partner and through reenacting it in a safe place, it's a way of healing that sexual trauma, you know? So, so I think the,

the key here to whether it's fetish or aware of the trauma that wants to be reenacted, it being just a safe container where, you know, you're able to be vulnerable and, and feel pleasure around what maybe before felt dark or I don't know if dark is the right word, but shameful then shadow to light.

Yeah. And that's how we end up alchemizing, right? That's how we end up integrating those shadows. Like we were talking about. Yeah, beautiful process. It's like the most exciting, fun process ever as far as therapies go, like fetish work.

Like play in your fetishes, that will heal you. Yeah. As long as it's safe for everybody, right? And everyone's agreeing. Yeah, yeah. I think about that, you know, with the power plays and things like that. Excuse me. I remember reading and stealing fire, Jamie Will and Steven Kotler talking about that,

like the, the hardcore CEO who, who, you know, rules with an iron fist, you know, all those underneath him and then just wants to get fucking beat later on that night, you know, like that. Ballers or what was that? No, what was the show? Maybe it wasn't. I didn't see the Ballers show on HBO. It was more locked into Game of Thrones. But yeah, like we ultimately, we need to round out. Like we're trying to find homeostasis one way or another and whatever, you know, if we're aware enough

and it doesn't even take a whole lot of awareness to know like I'm drawn here for some reason. Like people think about or talk to me about, they ask me questions like, ah, what should I do? Or what should I do? And you guys get the same questions. Um, what book should I read next? It's like, it's like just learning to listen to that. Where do you drawn to? Like what turns you on physically is a draw, but what turns you on mentally is a draw too. And just saying yes to that, like that's literally been my compass is listening to where I'm drawn to. And it started with physical and fighting and, and, you know, rehab and mobility and ice baths and breath work and

things like that. And then it's just gone wherever I'm being called to go. And I think that if we're, if we're able to listen to those things and say, yes, then that that's all that's necessary as the guidepost. If I'm turned on mentally by a particular topic, then jump right in, you know, like that, that that's nothing to look away from. And same thing could be like that, that fetish might be the thing that opens you up to a deep self-discovery. It will be. I believe. What are, what are some of the things that you guys speculate on? Because you haven't had much communication with the group that's coming in. You guys are still taking more people. Until May 3rd. Until May 3rd. All right, cool. Sorry, it launches May 3rd until May 11th when we have our first call. This is going up this week. So there's no wait list.

Thanks to Steven Pressfield's audio. But what do you guys speculate people are going to be bringing to the table with questions for you? Gosh, I think that they're going to be first and foremost, just trying to figure out how to hold the ideas because they're going to be, you know, we're going to give them some big ideas, but really start with the basics. And I have a feeling a lot of it's going to be, how do we do more one-on-one work? Because these ideas are so dense that it is something you got to work. You're going to spend more time working on than probably what we can give in a workshop, right? And we're going to offer that as well, you know, down the line. But I don't know.

I think that it's good. I think right now the audience that we have is going to be, this is going to be the first onset of this type of information for them. So. It's very beginner friendly. Yeah.

But I think, I know all of your listeners know who Mary Margrave is, cause you bring her up a lot. And she's, you know, someone that I see regularly as well. And something that she told me to constantly remember in this workshop is that the men who are going to sign up most likely project their animus on us. And they just want into our psyche to know what turns us on.

That's the main thing that they're going to want to know is what turns us on. I think what they'll be surprised by is what actually turns us on. And all of that is going to be what we're going to lay out in the calls. But I think, I think a lot of it is going to be, this is going to be one of the first times that they've been like vulnerable enough to ask what turns us on, you know, and then they're going to be able to, that's going to make a difference in their life. Cause then the first time's over, they like mustered up the courage and now it's not so scary anymore, you know? So I think, um, even just be vulnerable enough to

ask themselves questions. And I think that's going to bring up, um, stuff. I have a feeling it's going to bring up a lot of stuff. So we do have a disclaimer with it because, you know, just like with awakening your Kundalini, like you could very much have a dark night of the soul right around the corner, you know, and I know a lot of the men signing up, this may be the first like introspective thing that they do. And when you look within, you're going to see your shadows. You're going to see the things you've run from. But to get back to that first part about telling them what truly turns us on, it's what we've laid out in the calls, which are embodying the inner king, knowing your attachment style, effective leadership, things like that. So we're going to put all that out there. But then all of our bonuses, too, we have pleasure practices.

And when you hear pleasure practice, you typically think of a woman's like masturbation routine. You don't think of a man. So like, there's going to be so many things on the bonuses that I think are going to be new for them. And I think that's going to be something that if they're, they can be anonymous on the call with their Q and A, but I think that's going to be something they're going to have a lot of questions about because they've never, I don't think that men typically think of masturbating like a King. I don't think that they ever think of like turning it into a pleasure practice so that their sex can be, or like stopping the death grip, you know, like trying to actually replicate so that they're not desensitized to an actual vagina. Yeah.

Yeah. That's funny. I would never call my masturbation practice a pleasure practice. Right. But, you know, thinking about that, like when, when anytime you have a kid, anytime you have a kid, uh, there's at least six, six weeks off. Right. And so with Wolf, it was a little longer. And so, you know, in that, like I, I, I was like, well, shit, I've already had to wait and, and I'm not, I'm not going to pressure at all.

So how can I make this more enjoyable? And it actually did become part of a pleasure practice, where I actually was getting creative and thinking of ways like, treat yourself. I tried coconut oil, olive oil, all sorts of shit and took my sweet ass time for probably the first, I'm 39 years old. You know, like I can't think of a time in my life where I took my time masturbating. That's what we're going to be asking them to do. Yeah.

Yeah. There will be. I'm sure a lot of questions around that will come up. Yeah. I'm sure a lot of anything sexual tied will bring up a lot of juicy questions, which I'm excited to be able to explore those with the guys there.

I think we're going to learn a lot from them. Just like they're going to learn a lot from us. What do you, do you have a question for us? You were a guy entering this course. I mean the anonymity thing, like being anonymous. We're letting them into our psyches,

but I think they're also going to be letting us into theirs. Yeah. So yeah, no question. Yeah. Then that is a great question. Mercedes. Um,

my quote, my, my first question would be what turns each of you on individually in a relationship? So like, what are the mental, emotional things that turn you on that are outside of the physical that may enhance the physical, but ultimately are non-physical? Non-physical stuff would be, you know, and I guess maybe it almost is my description, my description or definition of what a King is, would be someone who is intentionally showing up as a presence. So like they are making intentional time for us in our relationship. And for me particularly,

it doesn't mean all day long. It means structured out or however you got to do, you know, plan it into your day or whatever so that it's not like half ass work, but also on the phone, but kind of watching TV, but it's intentional time. It can be 30 minutes. Like it doesn't have to be a huge amount of time, but knowing that that presence is something I can count on. Um, and then of course, you know, we all talk about trust in relationship being such a big thing, but how do we, how do we trust somebody? Like that's such a big word, right? And that comes with repetitive showing upness that comes with repetitive, you know, watching him build integrity by doing his own work. Maybe it's, you know, finding a therapist and going and seeing

that person regularly. I don't know. I'm just bringing up a modality. You can do it in so many different ways, but figuring out how he goes and does his own introspective work. Does he come with his plan of like, what do you want his life to look like? And then seeing when he aligns with me, does that mesh? And if it doesn't mesh, can we negotiate or, you know, is there, is this his plan? And, you know, he just knows where he's going to go.

And I got to figure out how to hold that or not. Neither way is wrong. It just might not be right for us. But, you know, the person who is a king to me is, he's doing the work of figuring out what he wants for his life. It's like what you talked about with the 80-year-old. It's actually a method that I've heard from like a death, seven habits of highly successful people where you you create what your 80 year old birthday would be, the people that would be there, who you are as a man in that situation or woman. And that's actually something my husband did. He basically went through that whole process.

I swear to God, on the other end of that process, he was a different person. And it's just like, you know, it only takes you a few hours to really sit with that process and write it out and figure out what that really looks like and visualize it and fantasize about it. But when he then related it to me, and that's the critical part of what a king would do, right? He would do the process and then he would vocalize it or somehow communicate it to the person that's going to be involved in that fantasy, in that 80 year old fantasy. And the other people, you know, whether it's, he's building a business, Hey, this is what I want the business to look like when I'm 80, you know, let's, how are we going to get there together and then get their process, their plan back. So all those ways of planning creates this man, whether he likes it or not, almost if he does those portions of

the work, he is in integrity. He is doing the, the work quote unquote part to create the outcome that he wants. And in order to see that, um, or in me seeing that in a man, I feel like that's like the biggest turn on ever. Um, the rest of it is like, I mean, I'm in a, I'm a very probably pushy partner. Um, even though I, you know, I'm attempting to relax into my feminine a lot of the time nowadays, but I'm a lot to hold already. So I know that, you know, the man that's with me has to be able to, to kind of come in and touch and be like, is everything cool here? Like, can we work on

this thing or whatever? And then, you know, come in and out and I have to be able to hold that, that he's going to do that. So I don't know if I'm kind of rambling on that, but- I like that. No, that's huge. That's big for me too, because I'm, I can be very much in my masculine because I'm running a household. I, you know, was a single mother for a little while and organizing the podcast and the workshop. So I'm very much in my masculine. So when a man can come in and be so much in his masculine that it drops me into my feminine.

Like that's very sexy to me because that's where the passion comes. And I feel that if a man comes in and because I'm in my masculine, he switches into his feminine, like that is, that's for me is a huge turnoff. So him like being able to be that like grounded conscious masculine that move him. But something, and all of these are things that I want to embody as a queen as well, but something that is a huge, huge turn on for me is when a man has a dedicated spiritual practice, whether it's, you know, you know, breath work in the mornings in the sun, or whether it's dream journaling, right, when he gets up, or stream of conscious journaling, you know, when he gets home from work whatever it is those things because not only does it

like in a way hold me accountable because it's like he's he's doing it i should do it too yeah um but it's an example to the children you know um and i know soul you, Jaya is a creature of her own. She's four. So, but I know Sol, like he really mimics the men around him. And so I'm so thankful for the men around him because he hasn't always had, you know, the best examples. But when he sees another man meditating or interested in the chakras,

that is full forth what he gets interested in, you know? And so that is something that I'm gets interested in, you know? And so that is something that I'm very, very drawn to and very attracted to. And I know, you know, when we're over here, and I know that we do not do this all the time, there's no way that parents can do this all the time, but, you know, soul can be really, I think we're used to Jaya doing this all the time, but like soul can get, like lose or loses shit because he has to leave, even though we've been here for 10 hours. And you're really good at like putting your hand on his heart and like telling him, you know, something that can be really calming for him. And I know that's teaching him to like calm his nervous system to ground himself. And so when a man can be that type of leader to a child

and like teach the child what it is to be that embodied king, like for me, that's a huge quality that is a turn on to me, all of those things outside the bedroom. And then, like I said, in the bedroom, it's being able to ask what she likes, being able to lead, make the initiative. But also a big thing for me that I do want to bring up, make sure we hit on in the workshop, because I notice for most partners I've had, to not be intimidated by your woman using toys during sex. It doesn't mean that you're any less effective it's just that the dynamic duo is yeah it is out of this world like they're also the sex toys alone do not create what the sex toys and addict does together so like they're both very very needed but some men can get so turned

off or intimidated or annoyed by a woman need like wanting to use a clit sucker or whatever it is, you know? And so for me that, um, I don't know if it would be the, the, not being in his ego or not being intimidated by the toy. Yeah. I don't know how to, it's like self-confidence, self-worth stuff. Yeah. Yeah. That would be what it is. I've had a lot of that too. Even like on the opposite end where, you know, like in a new relationship, I would ask like, what kind of toys do you use?

What is your masturbation practice like? You know, and they'd let me know and they'd show me it. And then when we'd go to engage in sex, they wouldn't go to the cupboard. They wouldn't want to, and they're like, let me get some toys. Let me bring in the cavalry, you know? And then it's like, there's like, no, no, just us. You know, like weeks would go by and I'd be like, look me get some toys. Let me bring in the cavalry. There's like, no, no, just us.

Weeks would go by and I'd be like, look, this is dope, but it can be that much better. I'm not fucking weirded out by it. I'm not weirded out even by the size of the dildo. It's much bigger than me. I would have a threesome in a way. Yeah, minus the headache of the psychological issues of bringing someone else to the party.

It's like the most secure. I mean, and Esther Perel's talked about that, you know, like the fantasy of the other can be enacted without ever engaging with someone else. All my sex toys have names. So they're basically three songs. Well, there's also that idea of like women, you know, we are, the feminine energy is an endless void. You know, we can't be filled up. Yeah. We will never be satisfied. We will either chronic disapproval, right. Just being disapproving of everything a man does, which is the shadow side of it. Or she just wants more and she just wants to get as much as he will give.

And that can freaking scare men because it's so consuming, especially if they had a mother who was overbearing. And then when we get into bed, we're like, we want more. We're not done. Even when y'all, yeah. When y'all orgasm, like I feel like you guys,

you're pretty content, right? Like after an orgasm. Fin plays across the screen. So John Wineland had a workshop where like he had all the women and men on one side of the room and he had the men raise their hand like, how many of you have had like an orgasm that you felt like it sent you to God? And how could, like, were you set after that? Were you like, okay, I don't need anything else? The men were like, yeah, I was good. None of the women raised their hands because it's like,'re we are like this forever longing yeah yearning so one of my favorite practices which i've told

you about before is uh osho's divine fuck which is like you imagine like the divine masculine in front of you with a four-foot cock of consciousness and you basically like allow him you visualize him like entering into you and like with each chakra taking what like doesn't serve you. Like for me, this is going to offend a lot of people, but I picture Christ. Like that's my divine masculine. And that is the only sexual experience because I genuinely feel, again, I'm sorry to offend anyone, genuinely feel afterwards like I've made love to Christ. Like I feel like that's what has happened. And those are the few times that I feel like, okay, I'm okay for a minute. I'm good for another hour. I think that's good. But I think men feel offended that we're not full after, you know,

so if they can grasp that women are never full yeah that's important that's feminine is longing women to grasp that they shouldn't be filled up by their man and put all the weight on their man because yes he's an important part of how you get your connection to source that fills you up yes well and your interaction with people that are your connection to source as well so i think all things yeah it's like he can also also be an Oracle in a sense where he's allowing this, this penetrative action to happen with you. But you are, as the woman get to bring in, you know, God or, you know, you're talking about, you know, Shiva or whoever you pictured Christ, um, online to fill you fully because we literally, as women, are a God-sized hole. Yeah, we are. Our vagina is a God-sized hole.

And our hearts, everything. But it's funny because I just now realized, I was thinking this yesterday, like, well, how come Osho doesn't do a divine fuck for men? Like, why don't men picture the divine feminine? Like, maybe they picture Mary Magdalene and they're giving her their four-foot cock of conscience, whatever.

And then it just now occurred to me like, y'all don't need that. Y'all don't need to do that. Yeah. They're good. It's, it's beautiful though, because in knowing that as a female,

let me tell you how much relaxing can happen. Cause you're so worried that you're too much or you need, you're too much. And that's what it feels like. Too much and not enough at the same time. Yeah. And it gives you that kind of like reprieve. Like, oh, okay.

Oh, I just need to be fantasizing better. But the world told me that was taboo to think about Christ with a four foot cock of consciousness. Yeah. I mean, we might be taking it to an extreme. You don't have to do that. But you can call it holy lovemaking if that's more. Yes. I like it.

I like that a lot. Yeah. That that's funny. Cause it just like stumped me. I looked over and he wasn't saying anything. He was just like this. Oh, fucking stumped. Let me wipe the drool from my face. Something that really helped me with that was just like, like, and psychedelics did this for me, but you know, the, it is, they have allowed me to walk a mile in somebody's shoes much better than prior to that. And then obviously they're not a fix all, they're not a panacea or any of that shit. I don't think I need to disclaim psychedelics, but for me personally, that really allowed me through many different visions and felt visceral experiences where I actually became Tosh in our sex and could feel as I delivered and received as her simultaneously, what that would feel like to be eaten out or any of these things.

And that bridged the gap for me, but also just the intellectual piece, like starting with the intellectual, like if I could have multiple orgasms. You can. It's a fucking- We're going to teach it in our workshop. But I'm just saying like for most men, that's not, they've never experienced that before. And if I just put myself in her shoes,

if I could have multiple orgasms and didn't, that's a fucking problem. That's a problem. Like if I have the gift. I've been in a relationship for years where I didn't even have three orgasms in a year. So yeah, like a man understanding that is, it seems basic and obvious, but it isn it isn't like let's just be real

a lot of the world isn't thinking like that and yeah you're right if if you have these abilities you're innately born with these abilities fucking use them you are what psychedelic was that we everyone and i know you're reading or i think you've read Magdalene manuscript, but they talk about that as well as like, um, you guys turning, you turn something on in your practice to where you both pretty much have those multiple orgasms. Um, but we're going to teach methods. I'm pretty sure, you know, them that methods for multiple orgasms, but because it is, I don't think most men know that they can have them too, but men forget that women can have those. And they're not that hard. Like once you give her one, the others are. Oh, it's bang, bang, bang. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Like the, the, the first hill is there. And then after that, it's like, you're in Austin's hill country, it's rolling hills and

you've got plenty more ahead of you. I actually, I what's the book on, uh, forgetting the name, but it's on like sperm conservation or the multi-orgasmic male. I think that's it. Right. I have it. I have it downstairs. I haven't opened it yet. And I, and I have, I mean, I'm going to start diving into Jamie Will's book, um, here shortly. Cause I just got it early and I'm excited for that. And I love Jamie. Um, but that's fully knowing like the stage that I'm at right now with with a nine-month-old that'll come later you know like our ability to actually have elongated fun sexual practices where we take our sweet ass time and we're not up against the clock yeah that's all down the road and that's that's certainly just a stage that can happen you know but to not be I'm not pissed about it I'm

like this is awesome we've got our little girl girl. Yeah. And there's so much down the road where I'm like, oh, fuck yeah. Like we're just scratching the tip of the iceberg with the potentials of what we can get to. That's the other thing too. I think that we want to get men to realize is that it's okay to schedule sex. Like it's okay to be intentional with sex. I think that men think, not men, women too. I used to feel this way, that if you schedule it, it takes all the spontaneity and passion out of it. But in our situation, it must be done. It must be scheduled, you know? And to me, that's very sexy because it's intentional.

And being intentional is a huge turn on to me. I think that's true in most relationships, even without children, because we're off creating businesses. The podcast is a child. Yeah, well, I don't even mean to compare, you know, whatever you're creating to a child, but just generally the idea of we are busy people. Like humans are, we found ways to be very busy.

Love needs to be scheduled. Yeah. And if we have a, like we were talking about earlier, we have a direction or as a man, you have all this stuff that you feel like is on your plate and you're just overwhelmed. Do not be afraid to schedule sex. Like it is critical to make that a priority in your life. And especially if you are in relationship, like to make that a priority in your relationship,

because it's such an important place of where you connect and you experience that intimacy. That is what life's actually fucking all about. Like think about on your deathbed, what are you going to be most pissed you didn't do more of? Yeah. We got play right up behind us here. Play is a big one that's circled back many,

many times in ceremony. Well, it has been fucking incredible having you guys on the podcast. I'm so excited to see, you know, your unfoldment with the magic hour and what you guys are bringing to the table. Now,

where can people find you listen to you and sign up for this awesome course? Yeah. The course is, it's easy to remember. It's just awakeningkings.com. And we've got the early bird wait list going right now, but the course doesn't start till May 11th.

So anyone can sign up till then. And then at Mercedes Terrell on Instagram and Facebook, at DJ Bryce, Instagram and Facebook. And then we've got a podcast called The Magic Hour, M-A-J-I-C. Yeah. And that we're, we, you know, cause you've been on it, Kyle, but that's an exciting place for people to get to know us better for sure. And, um, I would just also mention on the awakening kings.com. If you are interested, we already have a lot of signups and I want to make sure everyone gets a spot spots are limited. So hit the early bird wait list because that'll give you the opportunity to purchase the course of day. And we've got some

fun videos on there already that you can watch. Yeah. Thank you.