Kyle Kingsbury Podcast - #374 The Journey of Self w/ Justin Nault

Episode Date: October 4, 2024

This podcast episode embarks on a journey of spirituality and personal transformation, with a focus on experiential learning through events like Burning Man. It underscores the significance of community, spirituality, and the profound impact of psychedelic experiences on personal growth. Central themes include interconnectedness, non-duality, authenticity in relationships, and the acceptance of life's challenges and joys. The discussion offers practical strategies for spiritual growth, suggesting a shift from judgment to understanding and unconditional love.   Connect with Justin here: https://www.instagram.com/justinnaultofficial https://www.tiktok.com/@justinnaultofficial https://www.youtube.com/@justinnaultofficial  https://www.facebook.com/justinnaultofficial    Check out some extra goodies - justinnault.com/kyle   Our Sponsors: - Pique's Nandaka provides sustainable, all-day energy and makes you feel like you’re doing something good for your body! Try Pique and get up to 20% off plus a FREE rechargeable frother and glass beaker when you purchase exclusively at Piquelife.com - Let’s level up your nicotine routine with Lucy.  Go to Lucy.co/KKP and use promo code (KKP) to get 20% off your first order. Lucy offers FREE SHIPPING and has a 30-day refund policy if you change your mind. - Organifi's new Shilajit gummies are a game changer. Try them out and get a 20% discount www.organifi.com/KKP Use code KKP for 20% off! - The last Fit for Service summit in Malibu is right around the corner, and it will be truly special. I will be teaching a class on holistic health, creating full freedom within your body. Come join me! Physically Fit   Connect with Kyle: I'm back on Instagram, come say hey @kylekingsbu Twitter: @kingsbu  Fit For Service Academy App: Fit For Service App  Our Farm Initiative: @gardenersofeden.earth  Odysee: odysee.com/@KyleKingsburypod  Youtube: Kyle Kingbury Podcast  Kyle's Website: www.kingsbu.com - Gardeners of Eden site   If you enjoyed this podcast, please subscribe & leave a 5-star review with your thoughts!   We always love to hear feedback and are interested in what you want to learn. Reach out to us on social media!

All right, guys, we've got Justin Nault returning on the podcast. We have a phenomenal podcast in store for you. You get to do this one face-to-face. Big change to this podcast coming up. I've been listening to listeners. Podcast ads have been quite lengthy, and they're all back-to-back-to-back in the beginning, and I want to eliminate that for a couple reasons.

One, I think people will actually listen to them if they're in the show. You can still fast-forward them, of course, but it'll break it up so we can just jump right into the meat and potatoes of the show. You can still fast forward them, of course, but it'll break it up. So we can just jump right into the meat and potatoes of the show. A lot of my podcasts, you'll decide in the first 10, 15 minutes if you like it or not, but I assure you this one is fucking great and you'll be able to jump right into it. But this is how it's going from now on. We're going to have no podcast ads in the beginning. They will be every 15, 20 minutes or so throughout it. And again, you can fast forward if you please, but I figured this is an easier way to get people into the

podcast without having to wait 10, 15 minutes to get to it. Again, no intros going forward and ads in the middle. And that's one of the changes that we'll make. I'll do this once or twice again. And then from then on, we're going to see just the change of nothing to begin with. The beginning of the podcast. My first burn was 2017. It was, and forgive me for retelling a bit of the story, but, you know, I met Aubrey at Paleo FX. We shared a flight home and traded war stories for three hours. And he basically at the end of the flight said, you and your wife would come with me to Burning Man. And you're going to come work for me at Onnit.

And I was like, ah, you know, kind of got a good thing going here in Vegas and making good money on the podcast. And he's like, no, it's going to work out. And like, sure enough, the weekend I fly out to interview in Texas, I get fired from my only sponsor on the podcast. It was 90K a year. Wow.

And they say, we've got no money to pay your severance. You're fucked. And so I enter that flight knowing this, meditate, get it out of my head, be myself. And at the end, he's like, when can you start? And I was just laughing. I'm like, let me tell you a story about right before I left here.

You know, so he starts cracking up. We made it out to Burning Man and that was with just Bear. So like we had Bear, anytime we'd go to travel for shit, we'd leave him with my family in California, who he grew up with and loves and knows. And so he'd stay with grandma and I'd stay with my sister in california who he grew up with and loves and knows and so he'd stay with

grandma i'd stay with my sister and her kids and my sister's oldest is nine weeks younger than him so they're basically like brothers and then she had twin boys after that a year later so like this just lump is time you know at that house and um it was always taken care of but it tosh could feel it internally like i think he's too young for us to be leaving because he'd always have fun. But I think having a second one, we really felt like it is too young to leave them for eight days and then show up fucked up. Like, so after our second burn in 2018,

we went ham. That was the burn I was telling you about with because of celebrity figures getting on like Diplo's art car. And every day there was a reason. Like I was going to to take we were there for five days monday through friday i promised we would take wednesday off as a recovery day and i'm literally laying in a tent somewhere at play alchemist and um this woman was all over beautiful woman from switzerland comes up and she's like oh can i get you a smoothie and i was like that sounds great

and i was like she's like would you like it to be a a smoothie and i was like that sounds great and i was like she's like would you like it to be a special smoothie and i was like yeah you're a special smoothie why not fucking make it special it comes back i'm like this feels like molly she goes it is okay no days off so that fucking kicked off at noon wednesday and there was no breaks and um coming home you know like very great time but with When we got home, it took us two weeks to recover mentally from that. And, like, I don't drink because at 42, the consequences for me having more than two drinks to actually break, you know, to get an altered state of consciousness and have a good time, the payback for that is being paid back on credit. Like, I've got some APR I apr i gotta go back and pay uh for drinking and so i never want to be hung over around my kids and i've always i've really held

that strongly but even with burning man paid in full we're still paying for shit on credit if you know what i'm saying our fun is paid on credit and that two weeks it took to recover really sucked because it was like i don't want to ever be like this with him again. And, um, when we wanted to get pregnant, which brings us to you guys, um, I realized understanding the female body and you understand this too, with how many clients you have and how many people you've helped, uh, in all the varieties that we'll dive into again. Um, it's your second time on the podcast, but I want to rehash, you know, a lot of your medicine I think is, is needed in the world today, for sure. But you understand, like, the female body is always nesting. It's always looking for harmony.

It's always looking to make sure it has enough things on deck. This is why we know if a woman fasts for too long or does intermittent fasting for too long or does any of these things where they go too low carbohydrates or any of this stuff, that throws off their monthly cycle because that's the tell-s that everything is in working order yeah right and so if they're missing out on one key macro or one of this and one of that that starts to throw stuff haywire and it can do that for months right so we knew i don't have the break button at burning man not right now you know not at 38 out of 39 yeah and i knew we wanted to have our second little one. And I already had tons of visions of little wolf coming and dreaming into her and having visions of her since 2016.

So I knew if we really want her, if we can't go to Burning Man that year. And so we didn't go in 2019. We had her in 2020. And, uh, and having her too, you know, it's like, well, she's too young to leave. Really. I didn't even go on a hunting trip until she was three. So the first three years, I'm not going to leave unless it's for work. Sure.

You know, went on my first hunting trip when she was three. Went on my first AYA in years when she was three. And I think that's paid off, you know, especially like the male-female relationship, the father-daughter relationship is one that's like it's tender and it's and it's designed to open the heart of the dad you know and i really feel into that and it's like i don't want to leave my baby girl i don't want her to be frustrated and and so she's she's a big reason we haven't been back to burning man but i fucking love i love it there it is truly a unique experience for people who haven't been there. Obviously,

if you're still listening, we had a lot of people already with God, not Burning Man talk, but I promise this won't be the whole conversation, but it's like psychedelics in that until you've done it, there's no, you don't fucking understand it. Like you really don't. Right. And even showing up, I was like, it was funny because like, there's a lot of large people wearing very little clothes and I'm like, fuck yeah, man, everyone's getting it, right? Like, I have no judgment whatsoever there. The group we were with happened to be one of the better-looking groups on the playa, which is a little odd when you're number one,

but, I mean, that was okay, too. And we just had a fucking blast. But daytime arrival, you know, is like one thing. And you're like, wow, this is like Mad Max. This is something cool where they created it. The second you experience your first night, you're like wow this is like mad max this is something cool where they've created the second you experience your first night you're like oh oh sober or not right no matter what the dealer's choices of intoxicants and medicines like you see it change at night and it's like whoa yeah and that's something that's really hard to articulate to people who haven't been there like you can't give that experience you can't give the

ayahuasca experience without drinking it you you know? So I want to tell us about your experience and what you guys are fucking going through. I was going to say, man, it's exactly like ayahuasca. It's like I had done, I was so public about my psychedelic use over the last 10 years for so long that, you know, inevitably people are like, tell me what's mushrooms like? What's five grams of mushrooms like? You're like, listen, man, you got to dive in or we can't have this conversation. You know, it's like you can't, you just can't tell the experience, you know?

And people like to kind of microdose their way in and all that. But it's like Burning Man is like a hero dose. You know, you end up, especially by like day two, where you're like, this kind of feels like forever. Like it feels like I've been here forever. And the night is so trippy, completely different experience. And it was really fun for us because we had like 16 people with us. Almost all of them were first time burners. So Megan and I got to

experience like our best friends in the world, like riding out on open playa for the first time during the day, then riding out on open playa for the first time at night. And it's like, I would imagine it's a little like parenting. I'm like watching these little kids, like, like one of my best friends in the world, Brad is like, I just love he's, he's a dad and he's like so playful and he's so fun. I was so excited to see him see open playa. We're riding open playa for like 30 seconds. He's right behind me. And he, I just hear him go, yeah. Or he just like yells this, like this, like really deep, joyful expression from playa. And it was so fun to watch that and that was really the biggest thing for me as i'm moving into you know this whole past year

megan and i have lovingly referred to as pre-kid shit and we're all pre-kid shit we went and did five-star resorts in asia for two months straight and did all of bali and thailand the photos you sent me from bali were fucking insane. Yeah, exactly, bro. Insane, buddy. It was incredible. So we did that, like a lot of raving, a lot of festivals, a lot of party. We've thrown a lot of really dope parties,

did Burning Man and we went, and we do like bougie Burning Man because it's similar to what you were talking about. It's like, I'm not going to go to Burning Man and live on protein bars all week. It's like, I know what I'm doing to my body, especially you because I know you've had Jack Cruz on the show and you understand light and circadian rhythm

and all these things. So we're eating, like, you know, pasture-raised eggs and organic orange juice and grass-fed beef the whole time, like, to do the best we can, but it's a very stressful experience. And coming back, it's like, you know, we're still, like, sleeping 10 hours a night or whatever as we try to recover from this thing, even a week later.

It's a big deal, but we've been kind of thinking in our minds what do we want to do around what happens when we have kids we're definitely going to go back to burning men at some point it's probably going to be years from now because i think we're gonna what we're going to do is like you know we both have experience with plant medicines and all these different things and we'll probably just do six months of nothing neither one of us drink anymore you know we're working with an amazing functional medicine doctor. We know that we're both incredibly fertile. We actually froze embryos like a couple of years back. Cool.

Just in case. Just in case. You know, you hear so much, and especially for the women, there's so much pressure on them. Like Megan knows she's incredibly metabolically healthy, but there's a little voice in the back of the head that's just like biological clock, biological clock. And the problem to your point too too is that the fate of the world has shifted into one where like no country for men

with Clive Owen is becoming a very real possibility. Really, you listen to people talk about sperm count decline and testosterone decline in men. Yeah. And that is a factor in a woman getting pregnant, right? Like Dr. Nathan Reilly, Holistic OBGYN's been on this podcast a few times and he talks about that. Like the one that finds the egg is a misnomer the egg wants millions

surrounding it and it wants to hand select the one that it decides is the best it's not one that makes it to the egg first like that race shit is it's not a race yeah right it wants to be surrounded and feel into with its gnosis and internal being which sperm is going to be the one that comes in. That's really fucking a different picture than what we've been told. And if that number is significantly less, even hundreds of thousands of sperm instead of millions of sperm, the egg may say no entirely. And that's the truth why so many people have problems then when you take the mental emotional stressors which you've fucking really taken a deep dive into coaching people yeah that then it becomes that much more of a problem because the more you stress about it the less opportunity there is to give birth because that nesting is thrown off yeah no exactly and i talked about this on with

with my buddy stee on the radical health radio podcast love stee he's the shit dude he's amazing dude and we're talking about that it's like like the last thing that the body wants to do in a state of metabolic stress is bring another mouth to feed into the environment. It doesn't make any sense. All the human body is ever doing is adapting to its external environment. So this is where you get into like,

Rob Wolf has been saying this for years, like a species appropriate diet. Brett Weinstein was just on Joe Rogan's podcast and it was amazing to hear, I think he's a PhD biologist or maybe Eric Weinstein is the biologist. I'm not sure which one. I think they're both. Well, I think he's a PhD biologist or maybe Eric Weinstein is the biologist much or which well I think they're both well I think I think Brett is a biologist yeah I think they're both PhDs and both incredibly like wait fucking past my pay grade yeah it was so validating I mean

you think about the conversation we talked a lot about this last time is like getting hate getting called a quack the idea of a charlatan and all this and I was explaining on the last show but like I think the biggest charlatan out there is mainstream health and wellness, big pharma insurance companies, mainstream medicine, even mainstream health and wellness, fitness,

diet, all these things. Right. And sure enough, Brett goes on Joe's podcast and he's talking about medicine. He's, and he's, Joe was asking me how much medicine do you think is actually harmful,

not helpful? And he was like, easily 99%. And Joe was like, that's terrifying. And he was like, easily 99%. And Joe was like, that's terrifying. And he's like, yeah, the only reason we have medicine is because we're at an evolutionary mismatch with our environment, which leads to all these problems.

And then instead of removing the stressor that's causing the problem, we take a Band-Aid of a pharmaceutical drug that's based on inaccurate cellular biology, by the way, and we pump it into the system. It's a literal toxin. We're putting a toxin in the system to solve an evolutionary mismatch with the environment.

It's fundamentally broken. But if you and I say that, we're quacks. And even Bret Weinstein with the highest level credentials, when he says that, he's now, he's a MAGA guy, or he's part of the dark horse, whatever they call Eric and Bret and Joe Rogan and these very dangerous ideas. And, you know, CNN is saying they're terrible. It's like, this guy has the same credentials as another PhD biologist who says that medicine is the greatest thing ever. It's just picking and choosing and subjective reality all the time. You know, that's all that it is. And it's really interesting to watch people not understand that, you know, I don't

know where that ties into Burning Man. But I mean with the the the pregnancy stuff a lot of what we learned around burning man 2 was community as well and we started having discussions with our community when we came back about like how can we do this with our kids in the future how can we make a rogue camp bring our own generators figure out water have rvs literally bring like nannies with us people that can help with the children and bring kids with us when they're old enough to experience that, not nine months old or whatever, you know what I'm saying? So how do we do this? And it was so, so many lessons and I can feel, and you already know this about me, I believe that I'm God and I create this reality. And so I don't care how crazy that sounds to anybody. It's the facts for me, at least. And I can feel this experience of

like all these things. It was like, I'm like, okay, I'm going to Burning Man to party. And yeah, I partied, but I ended up with like, goosebump inducing lessons about like, I love these people. I need to be with like-minded people who have the same values. And we had a little RV park that we created. And now we're literally like, we need a neighborhood. We need a neighborhood. We got to be walking distance to everybody. And I can feel this whole thing progressing, you know, and then, and then thinking about like, some people won't go to Burning Man with a group. Cause they're like, well, I want to go do this and they want to do something else or someone gets lost. And then it's going to eat into my party time to go find my friend who got lost. And like, I had the exact opposite experience where like keeping, keeping the group of fish together was some of the most fun we had. And when we all came back, we do this thing, high, low Buffalo, like what was your favorite experience? What was your lowest experience? Called that rose thorn and, uh, rose thorn and bud. The bud is what you're looking forward to, but the rose and the thorn are best thing of the day. And the bad thing of the day,

we do that every day. Oh, that's awesome, man. Cool. Our Buffalo is like the most unexpected thing, like unexpected thing that surprised you. Right. And it was that it was almost everyone's highs were around the experiences. Like, yeah, we did crazy art cars and raves and little went into little tents and did the workshops and all this stuff. But it's like everyone just felt so much joy riding as a group, daytime, nighttime, following all the neon lights. The whole thing was like our favorite parts were community experiences, you know, so I can feel that. And it relates to parenting because I think everyone has anxiety around becoming a parent, right? It's like, oh,

I'm going to become less selfish. It's going to be more selfless. I'm going to have to, I don't even like the word sacrifice. I'm going to have to make choices that put someone else's needs before my own. You know, it's a shift. And in me believing that I create this reality, I believe that everything around me is a mirror of my internal state. Children are the ultimate mirror, right? I learned the most about myself through conscious romantic partnership

with Megan. It's the greatest mirror I've ever had in my life. And I know that kids are going to be that by exponentials, multiplied by exponentials, you know? So it was really fun for me

to have this experience coming back of like, okay, what have I done? Oh no, have I done all the things I want to do before I have kids? What if we just waited like another six months? There's some things that I'd like to do this party or this rave or this whatever, you know? And it's like, when are you going to be fully prepared?

And I guess that's more of a question for you because I don't know, but I'd assume you like wrestled with the same thing. Yeah, you're talking about the question, right i mean that's that's the the question it's great that i i love it when people are thinking ahead enough to know there's some shit we're not going to get to do so let's do that now i love that shit especially if you have the means and the time like absolutely fucking do that when abinvi said they wanted to you know x amount of two years of just being married before having kids was like i want to argue with you but that's actually super important

right build that together tosh and i were together for we were living together for three years before we had bear and together for four or five um you know when we had bear i was living in my mom's detached garage and i had retired from the ufc a year before didn't know what I wanted to be when I grew up I was working at a titty bar bouncing and bartending in Sunnyvale California twice a week and I had five days off it worked 11 hours a night two nights back to back have five days off we'd go to Santa Cruz do mushrooms we'd go run you know San Antonio uh park we do a bunch of different shit to be in nature and outside and have fun. But we, you know, we lived in my mom's attached garage. I had no insurance, no medical insurance,

no 401k, no nothing that said I'm qualified to have a kid. And it was ayahuasca that actually brought all these fears up. We had back-to-back visions of seeing a little boy. And then, you know, that little boy, as I talked talked to was was a soul who said my name will be barren i'm going to be your first child and so like that the feeling of the resonance of that in reality like oh this is now it's not later am i prepared and it was like all the fear came up holy shit you don't have any of these things jay you don't live in a fucking garage like raising jesus in a manger you know say like this doesn't work it just doesn't work and then all that fear moved away because all that fear as i I learned before, is other people's fear.

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off and always free shipping. And here comes the fine print. Lucy products are only for adults of legal age, and every order is age verified. Warning, this product contains nicotine. Nicotine is an addictive chemical. Right, it's on mine. And so as that fear shifted away, it was like, oh, this is going to happen. And it is okay.

And there is no right time to have kids. There'd be no kids here if you waited for the right time to have kids. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's the truth, right? Yeah. For all the planned experiences, there's more accidents out there by fucking double at least than the planned things. Because the planned things come with the stress of trying to do it. Yeah.

Right? You're trying to do it. Echo test from Paul Cech. I want to lose 20 pounds and feel great at the Grand Canyon. what comes back? Wanting is what comes back. I want, and that want stays with you because that's what you manifested. Yeah. So I've lost 20 pounds and feel great. That comes back before you've met that manifested that that's what you're creating. Right. Yeah. And, um, I don't think people utilize that technology when it comes to kids, you get caught in the wanting, caught in the creating,

and that's always out in front of you, you know, arm's length away. But I say all that because, like, you guys are ready now, and the best thing to do, you know, so I talk with Nathan Riley a lot about this. He's got a men's group for dads and does a lot of cool shit, and he's a dear friend of mine. But, you know, he's like, just pull the goalie and make love to each other and have fun and trust the exact timing will be you know and i had a i had a big lesson because we had bear a month after that i adjourning right it was

like that we're fucking pregnant i was like damn that was easy you know because i knew it was him and fucking i kept on videos of him even sober in my mom's bathtub i could see him. And then I had a vision a year later of Wolf, and it took four fucking years for her to come. And she came, you know, astrologically, and I don't know what the fuck this means. I understand there's something to it. I had an astrologist on the podcast for the first time a couple weeks back, and, you know,

I explained this on there. Like, I don't know what it means, but I understand, like, that what it was showing me was that it does matter. So I basically i was doing i in vegas in a house that was actually the same exact floor print of the house we were renting the sky rips open they'd flown a ship people shaman and it was badass sky rips open i can see every star i see orion earth spin star spin and i can't i don't recognize the stars but it wouldn't tell me that, why that matters, just that it did matter. Like she's going to come at the exact time and space in the exact location and draw on all these things that we're interconnected with, every luminary, every star, every constellation, every planet.

And that's going to imprint her design as she comes here. Human design, gene keys, whatever the fuck you want to call that. I Ching, right? That there is not only an influence of that, but an importance of that. And so she came on the 4th of July in 2020, smack dab in the middle of lockdowns, smack dab in the middle of the demolition of America and everything America was based on

from a good standpoint, right? The destruction of the good. And it was a full moon, you know, and every planet was on one side and the moon was on the other. It was pretty crazy how all know and every planet was on one side and the moon was on the other it was pretty crazy how all the planets were lined up on one side with the moon on the other and that was the day she came so like again i don't know what that means i've done a human design and shit like that and it's helped me a lot but it made me understand that i can plan for her but she knew the exact time and space she was coming she knew the exact fucking location

she knew the exact day she knew it all right and that she was coming. She knew the exact fucking location. She knew the exact day. She knew it all, right? And that was by design because of where everything else was, because of that timing. And I think if we can release into that and trust, like every kid we have on the way, every soul that we're going to give birth to, we'll have the right timing.

For some people, that's very fast. It's like back to back to back, like my sister. For others, it's like us. We fucking one kid every five years. We may have a third. We may not. You know, we'll find out next year when Wolfie turns five if we're going to have a third one. Yeah, yeah.

We got friends in jiu-jitsu that are like 13, 8, and 3. Like they had three kids each five years apart, right? So like I think there is something to that. So yes, yes, do what you can that you know you're not going to be able to do yeah um yes you're going to give a part of yourself to this other being that you won't get back for a while right yeah right and that's okay and yes you're not going to have to get up your life entirely because you're going to get some stuff back yeah um and then also you know let go let go of when it is let go of how it is let go of any of those things and, you know, let go. Let go of when it is, let go of how it is, let go of any of

those things and ask, you know, you can start the dialogue right now. I had dialogue with Bear for months leading up to him. I had dialogue with Wolf for four years leading up to her. You know, it's like, you can get that. You can get the dialogue. You can get the downloads on who's coming, what the name is, what the gender is, all that shit. And that kind of flies in the face of lefty thinking, but that was my experience, you know, at least in my reality. And I mean, for me, I fundamentally don't believe in duality. You know, like I believe in the perception of duality. The perception of duality is really real. I'm sitting here with you and you feel quite separate from me right now to some degree, right? I generally am in a state of consciousness when I'm by myself that is really non-duality.

And then I have to kind of check into duality for this. So when you talk about things like this makes perfect sense to me it's like you're talking to you who is wolf you're talking to you who is bear like i mean think about the way genetics work it's like they're literally you man you know and that's that's by modern science outside of the esoteric right it's like you are actually replicating dna there so i i firmly believe like in coaching i use i am statements with people and i think a lot of people don't understand i am statements because an i am statement doesn't require faith. Right? One of the most, I didn't realize that you met Aubrey in 2016

because I met Aubrey in 2016 at Paleo FX. I think I met you briefly. I was rolling jujitsu with Rob Wolf. Oh, cool. I tried to get to roll with Rob, and he was, I don't know, if he took one look at me and decided not to. I mean, everybody's online. He's like, oh, you're kind of bigger than I am now.

We never got to roll. You may have saw me rolling with Rob. We both had gis on. We were like online and he's like, oh, you're kind of bigger than I am though. We never got to roll. You may have saw me rolling with Rob. We both had geese on. We were in the middle of Paleo FX rolling. It was super fun. But anyway, it's like this whole concept of I am that I use in coaching is I think people get really confused by it because if you say an I am statement, you

then have to live in accordance with that I am statement. Right? So if somebody says I am wealth, but then every time they make a financial decision, they're just, I can't afford this coffee. I can't do this thing. I can't do that. They're operating from scarcity mentality. And we talked about this with health and wellness last time I was on the show. It's like, I fundamentally believe that the healthiest version of you exists somewhere. And as long as you are out of alignment with that, you will manifest poor health, chronic disease, whatever it may be. You have to get in alignment with the thing. So for me right now, I know I am a dad, you know? I'm not going to be a dad. I'm not going to become a dad. I'm not trying to be a dad. I mean, technically I have frozen

embryos, so I am a dad, right? And it's me and Megan's DNA together. You know, it's not just like frozen eggs or sperm or something. So in my mind, I'm like, I am a dad. I know this. So when I'm at Burning Man and I'm having a very non-dad experience and having all these peak, you know, watching sunrise with my closest friends after a night of partying that has been like super expansive. And we, we all go around and we share affirmations with each other. What do we appreciate about one another? Um, we have this line with, it started with Megan and I and our relationship and we expanded itations with each other. What do we appreciate about one another? We have this line with, it started with Megan and I in our relationship, and we expanded it to our friends,

which is what do we do when we're having a hard time? And the other person says, ask for love. And then the other person immediately says, what do we do if we're having a hard time? The other person says, ask for love. We just go back and forth. We remind each other. At any moment, you can pause and you can ask for love.

So we can do that within our friendships. We can do that within our romantic relationship. And as I'm doing this and I have friends that are coming up to me and like actually asking me for love because they've learned this thing that Megan and I have taught them. And like, I'm a dad, you know? Yeah. It's all the same, brother. And I really see it as like, everything is a reflection of my own internal state. And the more I can teach that person that, and then later down the line, it's, it's two weeks later, two months later, after I told them that thing, if they then come up to you and ask for love, and I'm like, I don't have time for you right now. Like they come back to me later. Yeah. You're not living it. And not, and not a very good dad. You're not letting pops. Yeah. You know, so I'm like, it's all this commitment keeping and

these, these lessons about, you know, keeping the group of fish together at Burning Man, all these communal lessons that we had and Megan and I sharing so much love with each other in this thing and sharing gratitude for our community. I'm so glad to have these people around me. I'm so glad I love these people. And I can just picture me in that moment,

like in the backyard with our kids running around playing and we're like, man, I'm so glad we have these people. I'm so glad we have this love. We have a community. We have a philosophy of love that is surrounding us right now. Like all of our principles are based on of love that is surrounding us right now. Like all of our principles are based on unconditional love, unconditional acceptance, right? Which is what

you said about, you know, seeing large people that are naked and at Burning Man, you're like, fuck yeah. But if you saw them in a Starbucks, they walk into Starbucks naked, they're going to jail. So this is a weird kind of thing, but it really is this, everything is just a mirror for our own internal state. And I always remember that I don't know how it's going to happen. I don't know what the linear timeline is going to look like, but I am a dad. I am. I am wealth.

I am love. I am abundance. I am happiness. I am health. I am all the things that I want to be now. And the last 15 minutes of our conversation last time was, was all about that. Like just unconditionally loving other. When I start with clients,

clients start in the mirror and I have them say, I love you to themselves 10 times. It's very difficult for people who have never done that. They feel weird. Their face gets red. They feel embarrassed. And I have to ask them like, for some people it's hard to look in the mirror. I remember that like right when you first get into psychedelics and they're like, we'll do whatever you do. Don't look in the mirror on mushrooms.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Totally. You'll get trapped. Hey, friends. I want to tell you for this brief moment about Organifi.com slash KKP. I've been telling you guys about Organifi for many, many years. They're good friends. Drew Canole is an old buddy.

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and ATP. And this is an excellent way to give that a boost. And by nature, it's going to decrease fatigue. Just take two gummies once or twice per day. I take four once or twice per day, but I'm a big guy. Go to www.organifi.com kkp and use code kkp for 20 off that's organifi.com kkp and remember kkp for 20 off everything in the store i remember i remember i was at a wedding on a decent amount of mushrooms it was in tahoe okay my good buddies and uh to uh she loves mushrooms but she's also my grounding cord so she's like elbowing me at dinner she's like you're not fucking talking and i was like huh she goes you're not talking how much do you take and i was like i think it's

the altitude but i'll talk i go back to being quiet it's great so i go to the bathroom to take a piss and um and throw some water on my face and i look in the mirror and it was it was it was pure joy and hilarity like i fucking couldn't stop laughing and i was like and i was sounding an idiot in the bathroom but i'm gonna come out here and like just the laughter like broke the silence in me you know but it was like this perfect thing and the bwiti in gabo in west africa where the iboga shaman work um that's one of the first things when you initiate they stick a fucking full body mirror in front of your face and you look at yourself for 36 hours oh it's like full on they understand the importance of that acceptance yeah whatever comes up you fucking

let it come up you got to ride through it right until you know you right till know thyself takes place totally such an important piece 100 man and that's that's when i think about myself as a dad right like i and and i think you know when I go back in time and I connect all the dots of how I got here, how I'm here in Kyle's house, right. Is like, I know that I created all of it all along the way. And I'm, I'm leading up to this place where like never before in my life, the, the experience I had coming out of the music industry was understanding that all of my esteem was other esteem.

I had no self-esteem. And then that external validation goes away. And I'm like, fuck. One of the experiences, I'll share this with you at Burning Man. It's like, I did like a 10-day cut for Burning Man. Made my abs pop a little bit, you know? Fuck yeah. And I got a lot of really positive attention on how I look.

From my friends, from Megan, from strangers. What are you doing? You look great. Totally, yeah. You know? And I didn't realize, because I've been out of the music industry now for, I mean, five, six years or something. Well, I guess March 2020 was my last gig right when the pandemic happened. But prior to that, I was I was heavily out of my way out of the industry. And I didn't realize like, dude, since I was a teenager, I've been getting positive attention for my body and my appearance, you know, and in a lot of ways that was bad because it was like I was very objectified and a lot of traumatic things happened to me through that. Right. And I had to learn all these stories about sexuality and obligatory sex, which I didn't know was a thing for a man to do. And like this whole objectification thing. And I felt really empty in a lot of this with Megan and she's just like so supportive of it and everything. I'm like, I didn't realize how much I just a whole piece of me was gone. And it was like almost every night, six nights a week. Someone was telling me I was handsome or sexy or something.

You know, it was like a part of my reality. And then it was kind of gone. Especially in the bar scene where you're the guy. I'm the guy. They're going to the bar for you. Totally. They're having drinks. So the fucking communication is a little easier to come by.

Yeah, dude. I mean mean girls are dropping hotel keys on the the piano and throwing their panties at me literally like like a freaking elvis movie or something you know so i had that experience and then and then now i'm like okay i'm 38 years old i'm about to be a dad and i know when we go on the dad journey that the pregnancy journey and the post-pregnancy journey like our sexual experiences are going to look much different and going to feel much different things are going to slow down whatever's going to happen there down, whatever's going to happen there. I don't know what it's going to look like, but I know it's going to be different. And it was just so fun. And Megan's so supportive

of it. But I got there, I'm like, oh, at 38 years old, dancing around Burning Man, like we got up on stage together, she and I, and people are just like, damn, because Megan, gorgeous. Right. And we're both just like, yeah, we still got it. We still got it. So we got to have that fun experience. But ultimately, the whole thing, the whole piece that I'm getting to is we start clients in the mirror with I love you. I love you. I love you. Right. And I'm trying to get them to a place of unconditional love. But that's like the kindergarten step, the Jedi step. Right. If everything is a mirror, then the mirror has to work two ways. So I can literally stand in a mirror and look at my reflection and say, I love you and give myself love in that way. But the deepest way

for me to give myself love is to give you unconditional love every single person in here if i meet tosh and i spend time with her it's like my only job is to encourage her to be her most authentic version of self no secrecy no lies no withholding i don't want some performative bullshit version of you i want the real fucking version give me all the ooey gooey details right So that I can love you in spite of all these conditions, I get to love you unconditionally. And by doing so, I'm learning the lesson of unconditionally loving self. The more you see that big person who doesn't have six pack abs like Kyle, but they're running around naked and expressing themselves and you go up, fuck yeah. And you give them a hug, like you're awesome. So great to meet you, blah, blah, blah, which is what Burning Man is. It's

almost exclusively positive interactions, you know? So it it's all i'm looking at all the puzzle pieces that i put together and i'm like wow i went from this place this empty place of very little self-love and the last five years more than any other time in my life has been almost the sole focus of like how do i actually love myself i don't have this thing and i want this thing how do i get it so i've been doing the bicep curls you know every damn day for the last five years. And I'm in this place now where all of a sudden, and I didn't, all the friends that I was at Burning Man with, with the exclusion of two of them, I didn't have them five years ago. So I had this whole new community where we practice unconditional love and we affirm each other and we're like so supportive and everyone's so lovey

and we stay together and we protect each other. And I'm oh wow i didn't realize but now i see that it was my own journey of self-love that magnetized this whole thing to me fuck yeah right and it was like the year before it's just megan and i at burning man and i think that that version of self i had about as much love and community at that burning man experience as i could hold at that time, that present moment version of me. Now, an extra year of exponential growth and all this more self-love. And then it was almost like we got to the playa and I'm like, did I ever leave here? I don't think I ever left. I think I've been here the whole time.

I think the whole last year was in my imagination. But I'm surrounded by 12 additional versions of self. And they all love the shit out of me. And I love the shit out of them. Wow. And this kind of psychedelic experience. And I can feel it. versions of self and they all love the shit out of me and i love the shit out of them wow and this kind of psychedelic experience and i can feel it i'm like i've never had more self-love and unconditional self-love in my life i've never expressed unconditional love more freely in my

life and we're wrapping up the tail end of pre-kid year and i'm like come on bro that's perfect and like nicely done just thank you for painting this picture you know and it's like, come on, bro. That's perfect. And like nicely done, Justin. Thank you for painting this picture, you know? And it's like, in my head, it's just happening. Like reality transurfing has a great way of explaining this. It's like when you order a steak at a restaurant, you don't then follow the server into the restaurant and meet the chef and say, this is the pan you need to use

and you need to use this oil. And this is, you only leave it on for three minutes for medium rare, you don't do that. You sit at the table, you place your order and you let the universe hand it to you. What do you know? Once again, a perfect medium rare steak. Amazing. That's the way I feel about, I am a dad. I don't know how it's coming, but I know I have never been more fucking equipped for it. And I'm so excited about it. You dropped so many fucking great gems already just in that last, in that last little tidbit. That was perfect in

case we run out of video here. We're operating on just the battery here. So the homie Cole has my cord. But anywho, for the people listening, which are vastly outnumbered, the people watching, that was awesome. And some of the pieces that you brought up were, because I know there's listening to you and Paul Cech, which I want to link to in the show notes. Brilliant fucking interview, by the way. Thanks, man.

Paul really broke down a lot of key concepts from Spirit Gym one of the things that people have the hardest even spiritual people have the hardest point wrapping around their mind too is the understanding of one it's the understanding of one mind one source one being and where does that begin or end you know and i think the ultimate truth is was what gaffney calls the true self. The true self is there is no differentiation. The true self is it is only unity, right? But the unique self and the separate self still are a part of the paradigm.

The separate self is where most people are caught, right? When I did 5-A-M-E-O and couldn't, I looked at everyone as a figment of my imagination. I had went full true self, right? And then coming back out of that, though, the whole point behind the unique self, and that's why I was looking over my shoulder. I was trying to find it. Oh, here it is.

Gaffney wrote this incredible book, Your Unique Self. Cool. And it really breaks down the importance, the radical path to personal enlightenment, the importance of recognizing that and alongside the Christ, love thy neighbor as they love thyself. Yeah. Right? Which is like, people could,

follow me the first to say it. There are a lot of Christians that know that quote, but don't live it, right? Yeah, of course. And even going beyond Christianity, there's a lot of people that have that until they get to the other, right? Until they get to radical Islam

or until they get to whatever, fill in the blank. I can love all people but pedophiles. I can love all people but X, Y, and Z, you know? And I think there is a point that you brought up to a couple of separate points that layered in together on one, to accept, at least accept the other as yourself is a fucking mission in and of itself right a deep deep work in and of itself yeah and then to love beyond that unconditionally the other as self that's

another deep deep mission and to recognize fully the beauty of the unique self you know because if we're all if we're just i have a fucking strong intuition from my own personal experiences that the reason we're experiencing reality as it is, is because experiencing reality as the one wasn't as dope as experiencing it this way. 100%. Yeah, yeah. It just wasn't as dope. We wanted differentiation. We wanted other. We wanted to be able to see in an infinite variety the beauty, the truth, and the holy in each of us. Yeah. And I think that's probably the biggest point

behind unique self, but it's also to recognize the divine in the unique self as self. Yeah. And that's something you nail every time. You nail it when you're talking to Paul, you nail it in the first podcast. And I just want to put a point of that because most people gloss over that,

like, oh, yeah, we're all one, that kind of shit. And I used to see that, remember the Genki Sudo in pride would hold up you know all the flags and say we're all one you know and he kept saying i was like genki sudo knew some knew his shit yeah i think it was him not another guy but it could have been another japanese fighter but i didn't understand that in the way that i understand it now right in the way that that you speak about it right i think it's hard it's a hard grasp for people to get that because it moves so far beyond separate self and so far beyond the paradigm of even our religions, you know, the father God sits outside of us and lives off planet, you know? Right. So, but I think it's easier when you have had the experiences we've had

that reinforce animism, that reinforce the ideas that, that whatever's animating me is animating all things that whatever soul I have is in plants, it's in trees, it's in these fucking dope house plants we have in the, in the room with us. Right. Like, yeah, of course. I think that makes it a lot easier. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's, it's, that's the thing about manifestation too. I think, I think the hardest part of this for people is it is extreme

ownership right it's like i talked about this on radical health radio where i was like okay like the idea of like doing the hard thing like jocko willing style extreme ownership or like goggins like just fucking do it i'm like their actual hard work is not swinging kettlebells at 5 a.m their actual hard work is finding out why they're addicted to running and they hate themselves that they don't do it right i think jocko does it a little bit better does it better yeah he does a little bit and he has you know he's got kids he's got a family i think totally i think he knows his why and he balances his warrior with the lover i think goggins if he has it he's not conveying it well enough to prevent people from hurting themselves let me just say that as the nicest

possible way of putting it i agree and i think there's a time and place and there's just it's like the same way tim ferris was incredibly useful for me when I first started my company and was like learning about productivity and stuff. And now like you couldn't pay me to trade places with them. I had to graduate from that type of personal development into like what I think is real personal development or like self-actualization, right? It's like, it's the same way. Like we recognize alcoholism as an addiction and people are just universally like, of course it's an addiction, like ruins people's lives. But you look at someone like Goggins and don't see him as an addict. That's very strange to me. I don't know why it works that way. But anyway, the whole manifestation piece

is like, people love the idea of creating their own reality when everything's going great. And we live in the Austin bubble of new age, spiritual gurus and teachers, right? And they're all just like, look at how great I am online. And then behind the scenes, all of a sudden, their personal life just fucking falls apart. And everyone's like, how at how great I am online. And then behind the scenes, all of a sudden, their personal life just fucking falls apart. And everyone's like, how did this happen? We had no idea. He's a Wim Hof instructor. He's got infrared light.

Exactly, right? Like, what's happening there, right? And when things are going bad, it immediately becomes this like, oh, God hates me. Why is this happening? And it's like, wait a minute. You were the reality creator three months ago when everything was going great.

You don't want to own this quote unquote negative side of it. We talked a little bit about this in the last podcast too is it's like my experience in the cabin that i shared with you was i have to not only look at all these parts of myself that i've deemed unlovable and the parts of me that i don't love that i don't love and i hide from the world because they're dark and they're bad and they're evil and unlovable not only do i have to look at all those i have to find a way to love them. And this is the other, the radical Islam, the left versus the right, the whatever, right? It's like understanding that like, if this thing works the way that I think it does,

then me living that person's life born to their parents and having all their experiences, I would be that. I would be the blue haired lefty screaming with a sign and swearing that Kyle is a neo-Nazi because he has a six pack, right? I would be doing. I would be the blue haired lefty screaming with a sign and swearing that Kyle is a neo-Nazi because he has a six pack. I would be doing that thing in that person's experience. But now for me, in my perspective, none of this exists without me. This is the piece where I think I really lose other new age spiritual people and that's okay with me, is like, I really think that if I do die, which I don't believe I do, but if I were to, this would all go away. It doesn't carry on without me. which I don't believe I do, but if I were to, this would all go away. It doesn't carry on without me. And I don't believe yours carries on without you.

And, and I, and to understand what you're saying that, and I wholeheartedly agree with that. And that frightened the fuck out of me figuring that out on 5-MeO. Yes. Uh, cause it, it, it puts reality in a picture that is not taught and is not self-evident, right? Exactly. And, and so, yeah, keep going. So here's the thing. We talked about this a little bit in the last one, and Steve and I went heavy on this too, is you talked about The Most Dangerous Superstition, that book, right?

I believe that I am the end-all, be-all, only authority of my life. I do not care what your credentials are. I do not care how much money you make. I don't care what your body looks like. I'm going to do things. I'm going to discover my N equals one of what works for me. And that's what I'm going to do.

And if I share that with the world and other people change their lives, which you've seen with my work, thousands of people have changed their lives from that. That's all that I care about. That's it, right? So I'm here explaining this thing. I really think that we live in a world of sort of pseudo intellectuals. And it's like idea arbitrage.

And I think this like, and again, like I genuinely love these guys. Like it's like idea arbitrage. Like, and I think this, like, and again, like, I genuinely love these guys. Like Tim Ferriss changed my life. He's maybe one of the most impactful people I've ever come across. And I've never met the guy, you know, and then we have the Rogans and the Williamson's and the Hormoses and the ETIA's and the Huberman's and on the Jack Cruz's and all these guys, right. But like, when you start to really look behind the scenes and tease these things apart, you can see trauma riddled within these guys. And it's because we actually live in a society where deeply traumatized people do very well at fame and money. So they end up very famous, very rich. And then this was two days ago.

Tim Ferriss posted this on his Instagram. And it's a reel of him and Kevin Rose. And it's just Tim talking about how deeply lonely he is. He's literally like, I wake up every day, my hotel room's empty. I wake up every day, my house is empty. He's like, you, Kevin, you have a family. He's like, I have to go out into the world and try to find social connection. And Tim has openly expressed on Chris Williams' podcast, like, he wants to have children.

But he hasn't been able to figure out the romantic partnership thing. Right? Or it's like Hormozy loves to talk about how his marriage is a business. We run it like a business. Right. And it's like, what do you do every day? I work for 16 hours and then I watch Netflix and I fall asleep. And then I work for 16 hours and I watch Netflix and I fall asleep. And I'm like, OK, that's great. If you love that. Amazing. That's great. But when people are looking at that and saying, like, I just want to be rich like Hormozy. Well, you can't just be rich like Hormozy. You got to pick all the other stuff, too. If you want to be rich like hormosy well you can't just be rich like hormones you got to pick all the other stuff too if you want to be hormosy you need the life

that comes with that like as as you know megan megan is very very successful and she says this all the time to our community she's like i would gladly pay 50 million dollars for this community that we have the way that we spend time with one another the intimacy that we have like i believe life gets better the depth of vulnerability you are with one another, the intimacy that we have. Like, I believe life gets better, the depth of vulnerability you are willing to share with the mirror. Because then you are allowing yourself to be loved unconditionally by other who is actually you. And one of the things that Paul said on the podcast I did with him that I loved was he said, I believe it was in a plant medicine experience,

and I've had the same thing. The first time it happened for me was alone in my house on 7 grams. It's the first time I did seven grams because I went on a hunting trip with Kyle Kingsbury. And I had only done five up to that point. And you told me this story doing 30 and this guy on YouTube that does 14. I was like, I'll just go home by myself and do seven. Okay. And I had this crazy experience, but it was the exact experience that Paul talked about. It was irrefutably, undeniably true in my body that I am the only consciousness that exists, period. No parents, no friends. I could cry right now thinking about it. I remember the feeling of like, I've never left this room. I imagined the whole

thing. And the depth of loneliness is so profound. Paul said it on my show. He's like, the first time I experienced being God as the soul consciousness, I cried for hours because I had never been more lonely in my entire life. And it took me months to recover from that trip. Yeah. And I'm just like, I'm hugging my mom. She was the first person I went to the next day. And I was just, can, can we just spend some time together? Like, I need to reaffirm that you're real, you know?'m like and they know i'm ultra honest i don't lie to people i tell everybody everything about me right i'm like hugging my mom and she's like telling me like she's here she's real and i'm like well of course i would say that to myself like this is me still me talking to me right and

like your 5meo it took me a minute to shift out of it but i think that's really the game that we're playing here is it's like if you're alone for eternity, that's real lonely, man. So like create a video game where there's 8 billion other versions of self and you forget that they're you. But it's hard to click into that. And I never say like I'm recommending this thing. Everyone should do it the way that I do it. All I have is my own journey. And I went very heavily, very quickly from age 28 on.

Don Howard and Spirit Quest and Ayahuasca was my first psychedelic experience. And then I did hero doses of all the plant medicines for years, for the last 10 years. You know, and I think the only reason why I'm able, like you said, the way that I speak about it is because I embody it. I never lose it. I never really lose it. And it's kind of scary, you know. But now I'm able to go into those deeper plant medicine experiences and I really enjoy it. I like play with the madness. I'm like, oh, yeah, it's this thing. And seeing like the things that I see in myself that I'm afraid it's like unlovable. It's the same way I describe it. Like when you pull up to a stoplight in Austin and there's like a tent city of homeless people. What do most people do? Don't look. Look straight ahead. Don't

read that guy's sign. Don't look at him. Just like pretend you're singing along to the music. Ooh, anything legit? We don't want to look over here, right? That's the macro of the micro of all the pieces of yourself that you don't want to look at. And everybody is so insistent these days on going to battle with one another. Like Brett Weinstein is going to battle with the lefties, you know, and it's like Chris Williamson is red pilling everyone to go to battle with the feminists. And Hugh Reinhardt is going to battle with Cruz and Cruz is going to battle with the whole world. And Cruz is poking at you on your podcast. And it's just this constant, like, fucking flex of fighting.

There's so much conflict and trying to help people see that the conflict is within themselves. And it always has been. You can fight and you can battle as long as you want to. trying to help people see that the conflict is within themselves. And it always has been. You can fight and you can battle as long as you want to. And you can be convinced that the only way to have money is through suffering and sacrifice and hard work and hating your life. You can be convinced that getting healthy sucks. You got to eat food you don't like, it's restriction and sacrifice and go into the gym even though you don't like to. And oh, romance. Romantic partnership is the hardest fucking thing you'll ever do

it's constant sacrifice constant negotiation being a parent is so hard right this whole world is like hell-bent on battling life you see what i'm saying yeah and it's just if you just look at the pieces of self and start to share them with people like really share your truest authentic self don't keep secrets don't hide things from your partner don't like be vulnerable you're, if I'm sitting here with you and you're like, Hey man, I know we're on a podcast and we should be recording this thing, but like, I'm feeling kind of fucked up today. Like, can we just like take a break and sit and have coffee and like, not be on camera? I'd be like, fuck yeah, Kyle, let's go sit in the other room. Like, what do you need, buddy? And then give you a hug. You know, like you don't have to do any of this

shit that everybody insists you have to do. You see what I'm saying? Yeah. A hundred percent. We don't need to battle. That's such a big one for me because I've oscillated since 2020 with, there really was a shift for me in 2020, in December of 2020, I just got to meet the guy who put me on my trip, who I blamed for a while. The YouTube guy?

No, the 5-MeO medicine man from Mexico. Okay. And yeah, I mean, I put it this way. I had whatever demon I could picture in 3-D, Bill Gates, Anthony Fauci, any of these guys that had become, you know, the bad guy in 2020. I would never wish for them the pain that is that that you're describing, that Paul describes. Yeah. Like, there is no worse hell than that. And I think part of it, you know, like in the book of Thomas, you know, with the as

above, so below and how that stretches out to when the man becomes woman, the female becomes masculine, only then will you enter the kingdom. A lot of people say as above, so below, they forget the end, which is only then will you enter the kingdom. And I think for four years i've been grappling with that like if it's the truth if we can acknowledge the truth and it is that lonely where is the alchemy taking place what is the remedy for the pain of the loneliness where is the remedy for the understanding of eternity most people don't fucking understand eternity you can't most people don't want to understand,

but to take it on just fucking inverts everything, right? That's when you get to the Tao, right? Like anything I told Paul, I said, right when I came out of that,

I was like, uh, everything I've ever learned spiritually has turned on its head. Everything. Everything. Up is down,

inside is out. Aleister Crowley said that. We must come to the place where up is down, inside is out, and all these things because that's the final part of the game i guess yeah but i love listening to you because you've you've tracked the same thing from the same place and used it in a beautiful way right and so like that's ultimately what i came to and i remember talking with aubrey a lot about

this and he had a really big gem at arcadia where he goes i think you're gonna keep getting because i'm getting the hell on a microdose of ketamine you know and i'd call it hell you know like i'm back in hell i tell them i'm in the uh the everything bagel for me yeah we're all the time right i'm in the everything bagel and they're just like oh and fucking there'll be a team of fucking people come and hold me you know like not bringing me out of the everything baby well of course i would send all you to fucking hold me of Of course. Of course I'd do that. Right. Yeah. But, um, you know, his word of wisdom was to like, when you, when you're in, in hell dance through it, you know, like if it really is hell dance through it. Yeah. Own the fact that you're there and fucking dance through it. And it seems so corny, but at the same time,

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that's p-i-q-u-e-l-i-f-e.com for up to 20 off even though it's a dream it's a beautiful fucking dream good job yes great dreaming good job good manifesting right i see my fucking wife and even though she's an illusion just as kyle kingsbury is an illusion fucking good job exactly great job my kids i don't think of them as fictions of my imagination anymore but at the same time they're a part of maya and then they were off there they're they're the eye consciousness seeing through bear and seeing through wolf yeah the dad consciousness that that's me and i've done the same eye consciousness looking back on them at the same consciousness through a different self and i think um that that has been a grappling match that has been four years in the making right and i even have like anytime i get ready to do a journey it starts coming back up the memories the the reactivations and shit like that.

I have a journey coming up with Silhwaska mid to late October. And I've been chewing a lot more. I was listening to the Universal one from Russell Brand... What's his name? Walter Russell. Yeah, fuck, you know, one of the old classics. Yeah, yeah.

On that shit and just rabbit-holing these old feelings that I've kind of stuffed down. Yeah. on that shit and just just rabbit holing these old feelings that i've kind of stuffed down yeah um it it is it is medicine to my ears to have you here talking about what you're talking about good you know for no other point than that i just want to say that because the fact that there is there is you know the illusory part of it there is the the eternity which basically means whatever the fuck you do doesn't matter because it's all it's all it's all the fucking we're here forever right doesn't matter none of them what a freedom and and what i do changes right how i interact with the all changes the interaction of the all with me right the internal affects the external the external affects the internal and the better i

get equipped at manipulating that the better life life becomes, right? There's practical pieces. That's the thing I love about Paul is that it's not just spirit gym. Here's what spirit is. It's what are the practical steps in which I can communicate with my soul. So I have something authentic that is bringing me answers that I can agree with. And it's maybe not a voice in my head. It might just be an opening in my heart or a closing, right? But when I have access to that intuition, wherever you want to call it, there's the GPS that runs the whole fucking thing.

The GPS in the center of the one, the GPS in the center of the earth, the GPS in the center of me and you, right? That internal GPS that it's all the one is accessible, right? And it makes everything better when we fall in line with that. Yeah, of course. It's like, I know better when we fall in line with that. Yeah. Of course. It's like,

I know Godsey's a homie of yours and like, he said that Prometheus Rising is one of his favorite books. Right? Yep. Towards the end of Prometheus Rising, he has this great little paragraph

that's just like, and that's when you realize, once you have realized that you can create whatever you want and you've created this beautiful reality, the whole point

is to make it better and do it again and make it better and better and better and better. Why? Because if you believe in God, the way God has taught to us in what world would God struggle for anything? None. He's all seeing, all knowing, all powerful. The only reason why he would do this is by choice because he loves it. Right? So it's like every time you enter those hell realms, the real shadow work of the thing is understanding that you fucking love suffering, brother. You love it and you go back to it. You choose it, right? How many hard plant medicine experiences have you had, right? In some ways,

like a logical person would be like, you shouldn't do that anymore. We keep going back. I keep going back. I love it. I love it. And the more time I spend there and now if I run into something challenging on psychedelics and I'm like crying and like my soul's being eaten, I'm like, same as you. I'm like, fuck yeah. I'm like, damn. And I know, I know I'm always coming back because the whole thing is coming back to this 3D meat suit that we've created for ourselves. And that next hug with Megan is going to be amazing. And your kids running up to you saying, Daddy, your home is going to feel real special to you. It's like we love the suffering. It's the same reason Goggins runs. It's the same reason why you trained UFC and getting kicked in the head. You just keep showing up for this thing. The rest of the world is like,

Are you psychotic? Why would you do that? And you're like, I love this shit, brother. I'm bleeding. Fuck yeah, let's go. There's a psychotic warrior inside of all of us that wants the experience of being a berserker. We want that. It's why Jockoerker. You know, we want that, right?

It's why Jocko is attractive. It's why Goggins is attractive. It's why you and I have so much history in jujitsu and boxing and deadlifting and all the shit, you know? It's like if you can get to the place, the hardest part about this whole non-duality experience is that good, bad, right, wrong is not real. That's the hardest part. Because you want to see a pedophile as fucking evil. It's a piece of the puzzle. For me to be God, the pedophile has to be God. It's the hardest thing to grasp, brother. And that's what the dry fasting experiment with the mushrooms in the cabin was for me, where I'm seeing the gnarliest things that I judge the

most harshly. And I'm not saying that we accept that behavior. Like that person needs to be locked up and dealt with and maybe they can be rehabilitated. Maybe in this lifetime, Tim Kennedy wipes them off the planet and that was their existence. But I don't have to judge any of it. I don't have to be emotionally tied to any of it. I don't have to fucking hate that person

as like the manifestation of evil. I can hate the condition, the conditions that created that psychology, that person's psyche is irrefutably fucked. I don't have to hate, that was a little baby at some point. This was a child, you know? And this is like you said, like with Fauci and Bill Gates, you wouldn't wish your experience on them. Neither would I, dude. If I think of Fauci completely unprepared in your DMT experience for 14 days, not knowing if anything is real and feeling alone and terrified. And now I remember that there's a five-year-old boy inside that person.

All I want to do is give that dude a hug. I don't care how many vaccines he's given. I don't care how much he's gotten kicked out of Africa and is buying farmland. I don't care. I'm like, bro, I got you. Let me hold you through this fucking challenge. Most people cannot do this. And this is what I talked about on your podcast.

The last time when I talked about with Steve too, is like, I don't hate anybody who attacks me online. It's the reason why I handle online hate so well. It's because I love these people. I need some of that. Yeah. Coming back to Instagram. I need some of that for sure.

And the thing is though, you have to understand it's like a child, right? If you love your child unconditionally, like just because you're dad, you don't get love from your kid. You're not entitled to that. If you're a prick, the kid's probably not going to love you, you know? So for me, it's like if I see Lane Norton or James Smith like attacking me in some video calling me a quack, my only job is to love them. They probably are not going to love me back.

I could sit here and say, you know, James and I could probably train jujitsu and be friends. But in his head, I'm the fucking weird metabolic guy who's spreading misinformation. And he can hate me all he wants. I have to love him unconditionally for this to work. You know? Yeah.

And if you can really embody that, man, the battle fucking ends. It ends. And it is just an infinite game of abundance. And I honestly believe that self-actualization, the realization that we are God and creating all this, getting stronger and stronger and stronger and stronger, this is the analogy for the Garden of Eden.

It's what we're working towards. It's just this place of peace and harmony where everything just coexists and it's fantastic, right? Will we ever get there? I don't know. I mean, if you look at all Star Wars, Dune, we love it, man. We love battling. We love struggling. We love being the good guy versus the bad guy. Some got like Cormosy on Aubrey's podcast. He's like, when I found out that the bad guy could win, my life got better. Like he's a bad guy in his own mind.

We're choosing the thing. We are creating the reality. We're creating the image of self. So the, the really, the, the lessons of unconditional love and the lessons of like what we're being taught in the bible it's like i always use the the scripture i paraphrase it like if you have the faith of a mustard seed command the mountain to move and it will uproot itself it will move this is like really understanding your god but faith is the wrong word for it and when i was at spirit quest my first ever ayahuasca experience we're having breakfast the next day and i'm talking about faith and christianity with Don Howard. He's sitting cross-legged like this drinking tea, just deadpan. And he goes, well, Justin, faith is only useful in the presence of doubt.

And I got goosebumps and I could not comprehend it then. I journaled about it and my stomach was like, this is important. I was bookmarked it. And now here I am fucking 10 years later, whatever, right? And I'm like, oh, shit. The mustard seed doesn't have faith. The mustard seed has certainty. The mustard seed fucking knows. Just in the ground, I become a plant. That's the thing.

So when I say, like, I am a dad, like, I don't have faith that I'm going to become a dad. I have a knowing. I have an internal knowing. And in the sharing at Burning Man, there was one moment Megan and I alone, and we shared what we admire most about one another. And I told her, she has no FOMO. Ever. She's like, never has FOMO. She's like, certain. If she's going to bed and missing a party, she knows she made the right decision.

If she's starting a business, she knows. And it's like, oh, God, I long for that. That's fantastic. I get so much FOMO. It's like a real challenge for me. And then she told me, she's like, the thing I admire about you the most is like, your truth is your fucking truth. And you don't care if anyone else understands it. And you try to explain it to somebody and they don't care or they think you're a quack or they think you're crazy or whatever. And you're just like, that's cool, man. Do you want to hang out? I don't care, you know? And that's what I, what I try to help people get to this idea of taking

back your own internal authority. I don't need this to make sense for you, but I do know that when you spend time with me, you're going to feel an energy. I can see it in your face right now. You know, when you spend time with me, you feel an energy and then you're like, man, I want to hang out with Justin again. I feel good when I'm with that dude. That's what I want, man. That's all I want to do in this world because you're me why would i not want you to feel good hanging out with me raising tide lifts all ships that's the magic brother that's it man you know so it's like people ask me all the time why don't i make responsive videos these other influencers make a video on me or he said that seed oils are bad and i had room at random guys control

and i'm like i dude good piece of content carry on bro you're not gonna hire me i'm not gonna be your coach like i'm gonna go over here and help the people that need help and i hope you go help other people too lanes probably help thousands of people get a better bench press or whatever the fuck they want you know it's like cool do your thing then my only job is to make you feel good that's it because i love you i love that brother i love you big time i love you big time where can people you have a podcast now that we didn't have that you didn't have before at least i didn't realize you had it before i slept on and i took a year hiatus okay the podcast has almost

300 episodes i've been doing the podcast for years okay cool yeah yeah we'll get um i'll share the one that you did with paul yeah so people can one click it subscribe you've got great fucking content there thanks man um and uh where can people find you online and all that good stuff? Yeah. So I just have justinnault.com and I'm going to make sure I have justinnault.com slash Kyle. Make it easy for people. I'll put our two episodes. I know you'll link them in the show notes too. And then I did have a big switch branding wise. Everything was, I have the Clovis Culture podcast, but now all of my social media handles are at justinnaultofficial. Cool. So that's all been shifted.

TikTok, Instagram, everything. Just if you search Justin Nault on any major platform, you're going to find me, N-A-U-L-T. All right. We'll link with all that in the show notes too. So you can just click on it and subscribe and fucking get the good word from your brother. It's been awesome having you back here. Awesome having you in the studio with the house

and long time coming, but this is special. Thanks, man. This has been a pleasure. I appreciate you. Guys, I want to talk to you about Fit for Service. Well, you know, we're in our final run right now with Fit for Service as it stands. It's going to morph into something next year and it'll be different, but it's not going to be the same. As we've done these things, we have built an amazing company that has done incredible events for the last six years. And we've also added in

a teaching component where I get to teach the Physically Fit class. Really, this class is about holistic health. It's about how do I get in the best shape possible to be the best version of myself in everything that I do, in all relationships, as a father, as a husband, as a coworker, as a creator, as anything. How do I be the best version of myself? It all starts with the body.

And I invite you guys to join me for our final event in Malibu. Go to fitforservice.com, look at the Physically Fit class, sign up to have me as your coach in our final run in Fit for Service. Fitforservice.com and check out Physically Fit.