LadyGang - Allegedly Wassa Happening #10

Episode Date: March 13, 2018

The Ladies tackle the headlines once again with another edition of Allegedly Wassa Happening! Hear their takes on the Bachelor finale (including Arie's terrible make up line), close encounters of the Fran kind, the magical Shewee, Mariah Carey's new photo strategy, a four-legged chicken, and someone pulling the car stunt from Ladybird in real life. For a list of all the products mentioned on this episode, visit www.theladygang.com Follow the podcast on Instagram @theladygang and you can email Jac, Becca and Keltie at [e-mail]. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey guys, it's your lady gang, Jack Vanek, Kelty Knight, and Becca Tobin. Thank you so much for subscribing on iTunes and thanks for supporting the great sponsors who make it possible for us to have this much fun with you every single week for free. Hi, I'm Barbara, aka your nursing educator on Instagram. I'm a registered nurse and I make content that's all about helping nursing students thrive. One of the first and easiest things I tell nursing students, if you haven't already done so upgrade your scrubs to figs out with these stiff boxy scrubs in with the ridiculously comfy well-designed figs that were specifically designed with us in mind they're super soft lightweight and breathable with four-way stretch and moisture wicking fabric that keeps up

during long shifts pockets are exactly where you need them the fit feels modern and tailored and they hold their shape wash after wash whether you're in class at clinical or working the floor you deserve scrubs that work as hard as you do go to wherefigs.com and use code figs ca for 15 off your first order that's wherefigs.com code figs ca well what is this welcome to the lady gang that's amazing say that again the lady gang things are about to change around here each week we catch up with hollywood's hottest girl posse kelty knight becca tobin and jack vanik hello hello hello and welcome to the lady gang i am becca tobin across from me is jack vanek and across from me is kelsey knight we have a new configuration i know now it feels weird i don't like it to me

and intern jordan is at the head of the table yeah i know you guys are really excited to hear our format or our whatever it's called formation now i can see when elena gives me stank eyes so easy you're looking right at her yeah i'm gonna watch you the whole time and look at you roll your eyes when i talk i feel all off though yeah i like where i was sitting and in our old recording studio we also sat in the same way this is a brand never been across from what if lady gang starts being like and it's because we're sitting in weird places it is weird i don't i don't know i don't know how i'm gonna adjust to this we might not very adaptable um okay so um everybody's week is good i have cramps i have a sweaty ass right now i just came from barry's

boot camp oh i'm just kind of sick yeah you sound sick yeah you should have seen me last week wait before you we move on when you said you have cramps so i have a friend who i'm who shall remain nameless um she started work at a new job and her kind of like mentor boss whatever she likes her a lot you know they get along really well but she called me yesterday and was like she's one of those women who complains every time she's on her period like it's just such yeah but like yours was legitimate like i was dying hers is just in general oh i'm on my period this week like what is that i feel like i mean it sucks to be on your period i mean i get it but like does it really it comes every month it's not a surprise it's not a surprise but it sucks it

yeah but like why do you have to talk about it i don't want my boss to talk about her period like i'll talk about it with you guys but i'm not gonna i'm not gonna go to work today and be like i will do the job but i have cramps everybody must know that i'm on my period like obviously people with real issues like endo or pcos endometriosis yeah like they have very painful periods that's fine you're so allowed but like the girls who just have want to complain because they're on their period i've never started a sentence with i'm on my period like have you i just did i feel like i do every time okay so stop that's all i have to say stop okay this is Well, I won't anymore because my periods are normal.

Good. Good for you. All right. I just have a small cramp. I'm not even so full blown. I'm fine. You just needed to say something. So it was just filling the space and silence.

That's all I have that's going on. Okay, fine. On that note, it's time for... Good week. Yes, it is. Bad week. Oh, no. Okay, I'm going first because my bad week is epic.

Do it. It's a little late. It's a little because I needed some time to process. I love those. So we had a lady gang situation at the house. we were shooting something fun and now that is so loud in these earphones here we go i'm excited for your story okay so we have a crew of like 15 people in the house for a full day and my house was built in 1936 or 1938 it's an old house um so we finished the day i do notice that every time i

go into the bathroom it smells like poop because it's a crew of grown men from 8 a.m till 8 p.m and so everybody's got a poop i get it but you gotta poop you gotta poop you know that's not the bad week the bad week is two days later i keep smelling this weird smell in the house when i walk in the front door now the guest bedroom downstairs we never go into it because it's just me and zach so i bypass the guest bedroom every single time i finally get we need to explain the guest bedroom is like down a hallway yeah down a hallway it's like in a different quarter yeah so i'm like god what is that smell i thought it was an orchid that was dying in my foyer so i put took that out foyer foyer and i still smelled it and it kept getting more aggressive so two days

later and i was gone for a day i go and i'm like i'm gonna find out what the root of this odor is i walk down the hallway i open the door to the guest bedroom shit and toilet paper scattered everywhere the rug soaked soaked with poo water i make my way into the bathroom that's connected to this guest room i walk in more poop i look in the shower there's like a geyser that came out oh no from the drain oh no and the toilet everywhere geyser it was a poo hurricane in my guest room literally the nastiest thing when you stepped on the rug was it like it was like soggy it was like squishy i have a video oh it's disgusting there's a chair in there like a chair that i bought to like really treat myself i love that chair ruined rug ruined another like chest

that i had in there ruined like almost everything except the mattress because it was up above the floor so but it probably still has poo like odor pharaoh right there's like poo particles in that mattress yes there definitely have to be can't wait till we sleep over yeah it's yeah anybody's invited um so i need a new mattress shout out anybody who wants to send me one um so i called the plumber he was like basically there were just way too many people pooping like your pipes so they're old they're you know whatever so yeah i have to redo the floors and the entire floors two feet up the drywall because the moisture traveled up the wall contamination we have to do a full-blown like can you talk about the guys in like the white

hazmat suits oh yeah i had to call i was like what do you do when there's shit everywhere i can't i almost had i almost had jordan intern come help me because zach of course is at work so convenient he's like you need to get that shit out of there like you need to get the rug out you need to get whatever so i was like okay so i call elena and jordan i'm like you guys i hate to do this i have nobody to help me and i can't do this on my own finally my friend jenna who's much brighter than i am was like that's toxic waste you call a company and you have to have them come and deal with that i call this company serve pro shout out you guys were great but they were in full-blown hazmat suits because it was toxic it is toxic they're who you call when someone you either

murdered or when like an old person has been dead in their home for three weeks yeah i bet they do that all the time they do i'd like to interview them about that i actually would that would be a great guest right what a random job gross gross story dirty jobs yeah so i just kept apologizing profusely to these guys it's probably not the worst thing they've seen i know you know they've seen honestly we've seen it all this is nothing i'm sure that's one of the more common things that they see yeah it's a shit flooded room yeah basically and so yeah that was my bad week my good week is um that now i get to pick out all new things like stores for my guest room i'm gonna look on the bright side yeah and insurance you know that's why you have insurance that's every

homeowner right there yeah can you even own a home without insurance or do you know you have in the california i know you have to have to yeah so but it's expensive let me just tell you it's very expensive but thank god i had it so um who wants to go next i do because i have something that will cheer you right up becca tobin oh tell me i've discovered something new on the internet that i didn't know about before i found it on reddit and it's called dog blep have you heard of it didn't you already say this no instagram with the boobs this that was an instagram boot my nose this is completely separate what is it okay oh it's like a yeah yeah like a derpy time Yeah. So, you know, when you catch your dog and dogs in general, when just like that little tiny bit of their tongue is like out and so they're sleeping and they're like, oh, I do love that.

Yeah. So it has a title. It's called the dog blep. And if a cat does it. B-L-E-P. Yeah. And if it's a cat, it's called a blop. And so it cares about the cats. So there's an entire Reddit situation. And if you just Google, can you Google, please quickly, Elena, dog blep? And it's just the cutest freaking videos and pictures of the little dogs. Kate, show the room so that I don't think Becca really is in it. It's adorable. It's so cute.

Look at all the dog bleps. They're so cute. Anyway, I am obsessed. And I looked at dog bleps for like two hours on the plane and I've never been happier. They really, they are the best. They are actually really cute. i get that much better than the boop like that is i understand more than the boop yeah that one that one that in general looks like orly it's so cute it looks like a grem one yeah my favorite dog

beth the frenchie yeah she has a permanent blep like her tongue is way too long for her mouth so it always just hangs out but it's so intense you guys because on reddit that people are like if your dog's tongue is just hanging out that doesn't constitute a blep a blep is when it's people are really anal okay anyway bad week i feel like you'd love that my people not an actual blep idiot a bad week jeans man has been spotted it's not your cramps i'm on my period somebody's gotta have a bad period in the lady gang now you can take over the title so listen i saw jeans man at the gym oh no oh yeah that's been a while since jeans it's been a different spotting you know he has shaved his head again no facial hair so he's

looking fine again he's hot again then i look down jeans man has become tight khakis man it's over are there such things a tight khaki yes this pant was let me just say two inches off the ankle and it was tight and it had like a khaki legging like a khaki legging is it like a hipster with a cargo pant i don't know is it like a like a choney wait is that what they're called it's like a chino it was like it was a pant it was like he went to old navy and they were out of the large so he got the medium and then just stuck his balls in there just stick them in i here's the thing you guys know i can't look at jeans man for like more than a second because i'm so socially awkward like i

just kind of like hi it's like looking at medusa yes turn to stone yeah so anyway jeans man khaki man weird i love what a disappointment i need more jeans man stories like you remember how hot our jeans man was he was so hot i have the picture of him on my phone and i'm always going to post on my instagram and then was like no people are going to yell at me and then i just like one day i just want to post and be like you're welcome why would they yell at you i don't know for the shirtless man well sexual when i post things that are not me i don't get very many likes oh my god have you guys noticed with the new algorithm that the only people getting likes are the ones that are buying them yeah i'm like hey brands if you're smart enough you could see

now that if everybody stayed the same they're they're fake oh yeah 100 yeah it's kind of is it going to be fixed though because it's pretty bleak it's the algorithm absolutely sucks it sucks why don't they just do it in time i don't know well that there's that meme where it's like instagram users what would you like what would you like chronological timeline they're like maybe be some new filters they're like no chronological timeline like maybe this like fun little face thing they're like no just chronological give a shit in order it's such a bummer it sucks and yeah you can't there's no way to grow anyways okay i'll go my good week is i have officially deleted all of my dating apps the time has come good and i feel so good about it because you and

demario are serious now no i can't tell you how many people have asked me about yeah oh so many people are messaging me about it still it's great still he's great i love him um you love him i love we are in love i haven't seen him since the podcast um no he even text me about it he did he i wrote i want jack ario to be a thing and he wrote back and he was like yeah me too i know he does he really does he's he's the best can i just say something really quickly bachelor related what i used to be the only becca in sight no hold on we're talking about this and that's all the beccas go on the bachelor it's a really crappy thing for me yeah now there's been a lot now there's three it says a lot about the name and i want to change it well you could go back to

rebecca maybe i will because i'm so upset is there any other nickname for rebecca back reba reba what if he started going by reba my brother-in-law used to call me reba that's great i didn't even know that i guess that makes sense um sorry to interrupt it just i had to bring it up i was do you guys see how cool i am we're like way off topic i know i know we're really and we went off topic in the beginning of the podcast you do whatever you want guys well you're so chill whatever you want okay so you're off the dating Elena looked at me though crazy still did you look at me yes okay off the dating apps I feel really good about it um I still like I'm glad that I used them last year because I needed a distraction going through a breakup like put

them to good use I'm not gonna meet my soulmate through it I'm over it ready to meet people in life so putting that in into the universe like irl irl um my bad week is the straw that broke the camel's back of why i deleted this freaking house so i like since the beginning of the year like i haven't really been on them they've been on my phone but i haven't been like using them and i was in switzerland recently i posted a picture just an fyi about the picture i was in a turtleneck and long pants completely body is completely covered it wasn't a crop top no it wasn't the crop top picture okay i was in like a purple sweater like completely closed i don't believe it and um i get a comment from a guy and i don't get a lot of comments from guys on my

pictures because my followers are mostly women yeah on instagram and he like said something about he's like oh so pretty or something so i go to his profile and i'm like this guy's hot like who who is he you know and he like owns like a bunch of restaurants like seems super successful and like maybe i had matched with him on some app so i look on raya i'd matched with him he had like tried to hit me up like five different times and i hadn't responded to like any of his messages like super thirsty giving me his number without me even responding so i was bored so i like messaged him on instagram and i was like oh put the puzzle pieces together that we matched on raya um and then we exchanged numbers started texting it got like really flirty and um i've like made

a promise to myself to be very upfront with guys about like what i'm looking for with dating now because i'm done wasting my time on like casual shit of guys with like peter pan she's reclaiming her time baby i am i wasted so much time dating a bunch of freaking losers that didn't want anything serious by being up front you're like i want something serious yeah like this is what i'm looking for when it comes to dating if you're in a casual mindset then you know maybe we're not yeah i don't want to waste either of our time because i don't even want to waste time you're like i want to buy cemetery plots together in the next six months yeah exactly cool so if you're on the same page so we're like we're like flirting before and it was great and i say this in a very

non-threatening way where it's just like you know this is where my head's at you know if you're in the same place then great if not then you know maybe great i would not want to waste our time the guy like snaps on me and he starts like saying every insult in the book he calls me a whore says that my instagram is a thirst trap and that i if i'm serious i should send him a different instagram that has less followers because i'm just trying to get guys with my instagram and then he blocks me and i'm like you're 35 years old also the guy has kids so i'm like you're raising two little girls and then you're acting this way what are his restaurants let's not go to them anymore no i have never heard of them they're in la there's i think yeah la new york

and miami you should swear sure this is now the name of the restaurant i don't know what they are i'll have to look it up arby's i think there's more than he would be rich if he owned a bunch first of all you're the least horror person i know i i wish you were more like a whore because it would be great for the podcast like i need you to whore it up a little bit jack it's true yeah like you're a tease it's been disappointing it's but especially i'm like maybe if it was in the summer and i was posting some bikini pics also maybe it was last year where you wore that like you wore that like high-cut lingerie bodysuit as clothes yeah wait for me wait two months and then you can call me a thirst trap but like i was but i can post whatever the hell i want on

instagram like that is not for you to say what i am trying to do bro but i was also fully clothed so like it reminds me of like a really immature kid in high school that wants to have sex with you and you won't have sex with them so then they like start calling you a whore yeah and they say you're ugly and fat or something like what a nat 35 years old and someone's father gross yeah i'm like really cool so i'm like so this is really a sign for me to just delete all this shit because i'm fucking over it it's true yeah so that's it good for you thanks i feel good all right coming up next we're gonna judge people yes that's what we do best that's our faith you're listening to the lady gang okay welcome back to allegedly what's happening um so listen becca i'm sorry

what we're gonna talk about the bachelor for just for like no just for 30 seconds because it is just hot off the press we have to we can't not yeah did you watch any of it do you know what happened yeah i know that the producers of abc paid ari and gajillion dollars to be excited that little smooth that stunt so the whole world is now talking that he chose the girl and then he dumped her because when they did it way back in the day it got so many viewers and all the buzz so i know how abc works i'm on to you this is all a ruse but is it a rude okay shame on you guys falling for it do you think it's a ruse no no a ruse to make it uh more interesting because he was so boring no no and to make it okay for becca to be the bachelorette because if they announced

her as the bachelorette just after the final rose and they broke up like on or you know what i mean if people didn't see the whole story behind it they might be like more disconnected they 100 filmed it because they want to ruin your life yeah like they do not care like the producers of the bachelor are so manipulative so they would be like no man you should they're they're evil geniuses it's amazing so i mean they definitely filmed it and it's i'm happy for becca she's cute i have to say that ari reminds me of a certain someone that used to be in my life yeah he is a textbook sociopath like textbook allegedly everything that he does is so textbook It's freaking creepy.

I don't know anything that he feels. It was like he had zero empathy, especially during that break up. He did not care. He was like me when I'm sitting here in this podcast. I'm just waiting for my turn to talk. Yeah. No, he was like not listening. He wasn't listening.

He didn't care at all about your story. He was just waiting for himself to like say something else to be back. Well, and especially when he just like was lingering around for so long. I guess this is what I'm supposed to do. just like follow her around like a freaking creep i know but they also might have locked them in there and said like you have to stay for two hours like tv i don't know it was so weird the whole thing was so but let's talk about what do you think of the five guys that they showed at the end i love the hot first guy the first guy was so cute the british guy is he british i thought he

sounded like south african just like a weird accent i don't know yeah he was so adorable i think he'll go far and then i loved the banjo guy see you would love the banjo guy that guy's a douchebag he's gonna be such a douchebag don't come out playing the banjo and then the guy on the horse creeped me out the horse is a bad thing yeah but that was definitely again a producer saying you know what would be so funny at the end if you came out on a horse and then he put her up on the horse and she had that high slip shirt on her vagina was just flashing everywhere and i was like okay anyway i have two things left to say number one chris harrison it's time for botox Number two, Ari's makeup line was atrocious in the last two.

No, I think he might have a birthmark on his face. It's not a birthmark. It's a bad tan. He gets red. No, it's whoever's doing his makeup is A, using the wrong color, and then they're not blending it down his neck. So it just ends on that line like when you were in high school and you wore the cover girl and you didn't know how to do makeup.

And it's too tan for the rest of his body. Becca's literally picking her nails. We're almost done. I'm literally pulling my gel manicure out. Okay. Is there anything else you want to say before I move on? uh lauren is the most boring person i've ever seen in my entire life did you see the instagram what about all of her 90 lines that she said on the whole entire season no she apparently was

engaged earlier in the year oh yeah i saw her ex-boyfriend's dog post about it yeah her ex-boyfriend's dog called her out was like anyway she's been engaged three times amazing and not that there's anything wrong with that there's nothing wrong you be engaged as many times as you want but live your best life they're both boring i don't want to see that television um wedding okay next topic. Fran Drescher says that aliens are the reason that she married her first husband. They were in junior high and then they met

later and then realized they had the exact same story. I think somehow we were programmed to meet. We both have this scar. It's the exact same scar on the exact same spot. So basically, they were both greeted by aliens. And they got the implant. Yeah, they got the implant. Wait, do they remember an abduction

story? No, they don't have an abduction story. Oh, they just have the same scar? no they came down the aliens met them but they remember the aliens separately separately but it happened in the same town the same time and so they like feel like those aliens were really there but they have but they remember this happening to them it's like we both have a scar are they doing lsd together no they believe this is legit to me i think that's awesome do you think the aliens came you believe in aliens yes you don't no you don't believe that there's any life beyond the earth i don't think they come down and we don't see it and like select fran

drescher i mean maybe not fran drescher and i don't like fran maybe they knew she would be up in space and they were like she seems crazy this was pre-nanny so that means they knew that she knew the future that she was special probably would have done that to a lot of people before fran drescher like if they could see who was gonna make maybe brad pitt or like oprah tom cruz although he probably no but they're probably all um reptilians anyways fran dresser is just like the ones that they're doing like experiments on but all of those people are all right this is going in a place that i don't even understand okay next topic chrissy teigen revealed that she had liposuction but it's not where you'd expect she got her armpits sucked out what yeah

i understand that do you know that's a thing oh for like the the little boob fat the fold yeah yeah i get that you wait you i don't have that but i understand because i've seen girls with a certain build, they can be so, so skinny but still have that little... I think it's genetic. Is it arm-gina? The arm-gina?

Jordan for the win. It's a little fold right there. It is. Yeah. You're right. I mean, it's the same thing as our little goggles. It's just genetic.

I appreciate her talking about what she's done. Me too, because everybody in Hollywood has done it and everybody in Hollywood pretends that they haven't done it. But I think it's really funny

to be like, I've done something. My armpit doesn't look That's the least of my worries, Chrissy Teigen. When you're that beautiful, you have to worry about your armpits. I know, because she has nothing else to worry about. She's perfect. Have you guys heard of the SheWe?

I think we should try to get in a lady box. I don't know what that means. I know you've been camping a lot lately, Becca. The SheWe? Oh, it's like the pee thing for women. Yeah, so it's a little... I had one of these. Wait, what?

Someone gave it to me as like a gag gift years ago. Did you use it? No. So essentially, it's a funnel for your vag. Yeah. And you put it over your entire lip section. And then it makes you pee like a man. I think that's actually a great thing to have.

It doesn't sound very hygienic, but... But it's not... Is it less hygienic than you peeing down your leg? And that splattering all over the floor in your shoes? Yeah, I guess you're right. Yeah, I think it's great. And they've had those for a while. I remember seeing those like a long time ago.

I wish that you could shiwi at the airport. Like everyone got a disposable shiwi when they entered LAX. Why don't you just buy one and bring it with you on trips? And then you can have a shiwi at the airport. But then she has to like rinse it out in the sink. but also i'm not concerned about my peeing i can aim i can get my pee in the toilet it's every other woman on the planet yeah that's what are you doing why is your pee all over the toilet and if you're gonna pee all over the toilet could you wipe it up after yeah you're just gonna leave

the pee for the next person how dare you i told you about my theory about women who leave urine on their toilet seats the same women that pee on toilet seats and don't wipe it are the same women who sleep in thong underwear oh sleeping in a thong yeah i told you guys that i slept in thongs up until like a couple years ago yeah it was like nothing sounds nothing sounds more disgusting to me and also i used to only wear like lace thongs which are the most uncomfortable oh i think lace thongs are the most comfortable i don't i like like a like a stretchy spandex blend yeah a blend if you will i think it's a blend it is okay you have to put something with spandex mariah carey has decided she's no longer taking photos with fans allegedly um instead she hired

a private lighting and photographer to follow her around if queen mariah will take a photograph with you you will be emailed it at a later time the source says it's a tedious procedure that's genius that is so funny to control that i mean not that many people are asking me but nine times out of 10 when they do i look like like shit shit yeah that is so funny so it's gonna go through facetune it's gonna have a filter it's gonna have a logo it's gonna be so shitty though she's gonna facetune herself and leave you she's gonna leave you yeah i know i have friends that do that it's pretty rude it is it is rude or i've had a friend that facetuned i don't know if i've talked about this there was like a picture of like a group of us she facetuned

herself skinnier, so it Facetuned me fatter. I also have the original photo of this where I am not stretched out, and you don't look like a toothpick, but okay. I mean, I don't understand how celebrities get away with Facetuning their photos. Can we talk about it? Actually, I was going to save this, but

I will tell you. It's crazy. Oh, there is this one blogger that I follow that there is a separate account. Yeah, we were what? No, hold on. This is brand new. I'm pulling it out. I have a picture. Hold on. I just was showing. It's not there. it's a site called CelebFace and you have to

message them to get in to the Instagram and it basically takes the pictures that a celebrity posts on their Instagram and goes against Getty Images oh my god so when they facetune them that one's not bad she just put a filter on her face no her leg

she took in her little leg that's why if you're going to facetune a picture make sure it's a picture that you took on your own camera that there's not an original of anyway true celeb face yikes don't take a getty image but you have to you have to like request to follow it's a private account zach and i were watching the oscars like pre whatever and um you were like wow everyone is ugly in hollywood yeah that and we we know a girl who was there and follow her on instagram we don't see her often like so she's on instagram she's

stunning like either way but on instagram she really like steps it up with her face tuning so then when we saw her on camera he was like is it just me or is she like way less attractive no the other thing this account does is they do extreme close-ups of the face so you can see like all little whitehead zits whatever because like far away gal gadot you're like oh my god you're so perfect and then up close girls got bumpy skin because she's a human no like everybody else no but it's true it's like but and then i was did you feel good about yourself i didn't feel good about myself i was like sad for her because she's still beautiful but why are you going to set the standard so freaking astronomically high so that when people meet you in person they're kind of

disappointed when people should not feel disappointed not disappointed no that's true that i love it when people meet me and say that i look better look better in person because number one i looked like a like a monster from the black lagoon on television like on glee so it's nice i wouldn't say the black lagoon but okay terrible you look beautiful no you didn't for about a year it was like watch your highlights on youtube and i oh thank you um but anyways it's just wouldn't you rather that like i would so much rather people say that that's the problem just with social media and instagram in general because it's like everybody everybody is doing it and i've made like a like a thing in my life where i'm like i'm not touching my photos anymore when it comes

out because i used to everybody did and i'm like that's the thing i don't want somebody meeting me and that's also why i deleted my apps i don't want somebody meeting me but and judging me by like my best picked photos that are all like the best of a hundred in my entire life and then you meet a normal person like anybody is going to be disappointed in that aspect it's a real bummer you look superhuman online stupid it's true next this one's very important everyone villagers have flocked to see a baby chicken born with four legs discovered in india it's like a dog but it's a chicken it's got front legs and back legs so it walks like a dog yep it walks does it have um wings as well it has wings too has four legs what's the chicken's name do they do they think

it's like rover it's it's basically like like a secret like birth this chicken from alien do you see it no but do they think it's like a like a sacred animal now i don't know actually but that's probably like you wouldn't eat that chicken you try to breed it and then the chickens are going to take over the world i thought you guys would be more excited about that story honestly i don't really get that excited it's sad yeah it's probably yeah can we die can you show us please oh wait why is that sad oh because it looks like a genetic mutation it doesn't look like a dog you're wrong it has two legs forward and then like two legs on the side like it's half of the square take the other two okay next topic i got excited i thought it was a dog okay last one this is so

good okay so this woman and her guy are getting in a massive fight right and they're driving down the freeway have you ever seen people like fighting with each other on the freeway it's the best this is so great so they're driving down the freeway they're going 60 miles an hour and she's like i'm out and she opens the door doesn't she do that in ladybird i don't know yes but this is so much faster and this is real life no stunt double and they she jumps out at 60 miles an hour and is like just rolls down and she survived tuck and roll she needs to be on meds that is so important and you can jump out of a moving car going 60 60 miles an hour is fast you guys have you guys ever seen that documentary it's these two sisters from like switzerland or something

sweden and they are like what the hell is it called they're like folia do is what they have it's like when they're that's like what they were under what folia do what does that mean That's, like, why they were doing all that crazy shit. I thought that they weren't on anything. No, it's not like that. It's, like, mentally. Oh, it was, like, a shared delusion. Yeah.

A shared delusion? These two sisters. Is that what we all have here? That's what the Lady Gang is. We have a trio of delusions. No, they're, like, they had superhuman strength and kept getting hit by cars and would just stand right up and would go and run across the freeway, get hit by another car, would stand right up.

And did they kill anybody? I think they killed people. They killed a bunch of people. They weren't on drugs. they were just like they have this crazy shared delusion i need to figure out what it's called oh it is great story it's really good sorry it reminded me of that because they probably did that have you ever been so mad that you jump out of a moving car no i don't know if i get if i got that angry i feel like the most worked up i've gotten and this is like as a teenager early 20s

and like a relationship was like throwing a cell phone out of cabinet like that was my yeah by breaking i just like cry yeah we're like slamming doors i would just beg them to love me still i would just be silent in the back like sobbing no it's okay okay i just want to say oh last thing sorry there's one more what lindsey lowen's doing a makeup line yes nice yes can we get her on probably i would love for her to be a guest i would too she would be a primo guest she's busy in dubai oh she's still with the boyfriend that they like kept like publicly breaking up and fighting and stuff you know what i'm talking about did she get out of the car it was no but that would not surprise me okay whatever okay cool when we come back we're gonna help you figure out

your life but probably not hey ladies get funky ask the lady gang okay and we're back uh before we start ask the lady gang if you guys want 20% off really long i'm sorry i know i read them they they make sense your glasses on jack i know if you want 20% off at jackmanic.com use code lady gang if you've used that code i have a special code it's supposed to be for people in our facebook group but it's lg lg fb 20 okay lg fb 20 like lady gang facebook 20 um only for this month okay here we go first question comes from nicole nicole says my boyfriend and i have been dating for a few years and he is honestly the first guy who my friends and family love and he has always treated me great however a few months ago his roommate had a party when

i was out of town a girl passed out in my boyfriend's bed he had been drinking for about eight hours at this point sorry we've done this question we did yeah unless it's the exact we basically this girl's boyfriend uh was super drunk a girl passed out in his bed he made out with her and he's like begging to be with her said he'd go to therapy and stuff is she an idiot for staying with him that's the gist of that question yeah we've definitely had this conversation i don't remember we've had this conversation but it's a different question is it a different girl ladies more like gentlemen come on guys get out get out get out i'm sorry get out get out and you don't just after a few years of being with somebody like end up drinking all day and

get in a bed and make out with somebody else yeah no yeah i mean that's that's bad also there's like an extra part where she goes also it was a 100 one-time thing and you don't know that he has blocked her on everything so i'm not worried about him having a secret affair you should be worried a secret affair is one you would not know about nicole which is probably what's happening here's the thing i don't know how old said boyfriend is but i don't care if you're an adult and you've been drinking for eight hours and you get so effed up that you make a dumb decision like this there's deeper issues i'm sorry but at this point in my life like number one pace yourself number two if you know that you have a tendency to fall off the rails after eight hours of drinking maybe don't do

that a ever or b when your girlfriend's not there he's an idiot i hate him no and i feel like you should like even if you're blacked out drunk you should know that another girl in your bed that's not your girlfriend is a mistake even if you are blacked out when's the last time you drank for eight hours oh last two weeks yeah i'm like it's been 10 years i can drink for like three hours And then I'm like, I'm tired. I mean, I drink all day long, but that's the thing. It's like, you're not like pounding. I'm drinking an Aperol spritz.

Yeah. Yeah. Like one an hour. Okay. Yeah. And mine was like, like literally it was like an eclipse. That's how often it happens for me. Mine happens all the time, but that's just me.

Spend a million dollars a weekend or two guys buy you all these drinks. Cause Zach and I went out last Saturday for about eight hours and I was like, we should have gone on goddamn vacation. I know. We spent hundreds of dollars today. Yeah. But I don't, like, own a house or anything. That's true.

You know? Or, like, have a pet. You don't have a child. Poop house. Yeah, it's just me. So spend it on booze. Good for you. Second question's from Sophia.

Sophia says, help. I hate my job and I have the most annoying boss ever. Ditto. Wait, me? Who, yourself? She's talking about me. I'm not the boss. You are the boss.

I'm just bossy. You're the boss. I'm just bossy. Actually, you know what? Elena's the boss now. Well, yeah. Elena is the boss. I was talking to my parents about you for, like, an hour this weekend.

Who are you? Do they want to adopt me, too? Yeah, they do. Those healthy skins want to adopt me. You're going to have so many parents. I know. No, just about how amazing you are and how you do everything. Okay.

She says, I've only been at this job for about six months, and it was presented much differently than how it is now. I started my own business a couple months ago, and I'm doing well, but not that well enough to quit my job. WTF do I do? Do I find a new job that's part-time and focus on my new business, or do I suck it up and stay miserable? I'm worried I won't even be able to match my current salary at any other position or job

and then be even more miserable that I can't afford an occasional shopping spree or luxurious vacation. What's this girl's name? Sophia. Sophia. She says, how do I cope and when will the world just pay me for being the fabulous betch I am? Sophia, the answer is never. And also, you're probably, listen, everywhere you go, no matter what job you take, there's going to be someone you hate. So it's your boss at this job.

It's going to be your cubicle mate at the next spot. And it's going to be someone that you have to be in a meeting with every day at the next thing. Nobody likes their jobs. Jobs are fun. And everyone at a job is like, we're a family. You're not a family. You don't like each other that much. You're just living in hell.

You're just living together. And I think if it sounds like you're making a pretty penny, you should just put on your blinders, do your work, and enjoy your purses. Yeah. I mean, suck it up. And you're doing your side business. So, you know, this is making you enough of an income to be able to do that. so i mean work your ass off on your side business like on your off time and then hopefully you can just quit your job one day it's like becca and jack and elena and even jordan the intern they

all hate their job at the lady gang because i'm an awful boss but they just hang in because we're making so much money so much zero money i'm gonna say wait i'm sorry why am i here no i have to channel when my sister came on the podcast a while back yeah she had like a similar answer i expected dinner to be like follow your heart rainbows are for everyone like find your truth but really it's suck it up being an adult sucks you clearly have a passion and it's not going to be whatever this other job is it's whatever your side hustle is congratulations that you found that in the meantime yeah you just have to like deal with it gotta yeah you'll hate another job so you might as well hate a job and make a lot of money yeah it's true and just you'll it'll motivate you even

more to make your business successful sooner so you can get the f out of that job yep agreed okay last question comes from anonymous anonymous says i've never used a tampon before and although i tried to put one in i got confused and nothing wanted to go in does it make a difference to my being a real girl if i can't use tampons but only pads love you guys love you guys um number one not a dumb question but when you tried putting the tampon in was it like the first or second day of your period because that makes a big difference for me putting a tampon in on like day four is like trying to get like my finger out of a fly trap whatever those Chinese finger traps like it's dry it's tight it needs to be attempted a very small tampon attempted

the heaviest flow day yep I agree but more importantly yes you're still a real girl if you can't use tampons that's just preference yeah do you boo i mean i have told the story about when i got a tampon stuck and i had to go to the er er and had to get it taken out so that was awesome i was also 16 i'm assuming this girl is younger yeah um definitely get like the tiniest light tampon with one of like a plastic applicator because the ones that are cardboard like i can't even put in and they're disgusting so maybe try again it also is just kind of hard sometimes figuring out like where it goes dr kelty what's to tell you i have a tilted uterus oh so she has one and so what helps me this is like some real intense is that you put your foot up on the toilet

seat and for some reason doing that it like gives you like a straighter line if because my uterus sits sideways so when i try to put a tampon in it hits the sidewall it doesn't go so you might get in cat cow i have to get in cacao um anyway and also i think my tampon sits side anyway whatever it's it's tricky up there but the thing is it's like it's like masturbation you just got to keep trying until you do it and also there's also so many other options get thanks thanks are awesome if you're not bleeding like a ton yeah cool love you so much am i a real woman you're no yeah you are because i'm more than enough i'm not a girl i'm not a woman okay well we love you so much thank you so much to for subscribing to this show on apple podcasts or spotify and

leaving us a five-star review we need more reviews and um and if you listen to this episode leave us a comment on our last instagram post yeah and we're going to be picking people to get special gifts and surprises from us for the people that really are reactive and if you left us a five-star review comment feel free to screenshot it and then send a picture of that review to hello lady gang at gmail.com because we also are going to be sending surprises to you Because we know you won't do shit just because you like us. You have to do it because we're going to give you shit. And that's fine.

Yeah. We love you so much. Follow us on Instagram. At Jack Vanek. At Kelty Knight. Just kidding. I'm at Kelty. At Becca.

And at ugly Instagrams is Elena if you want to follow her. She has so many followers. So it's weird. And at the Lady Gang. We love you so much. And we will see you next Tuesday. Yay! Woo!

Yay! Woo! Join the Lady Gang every Tuesday at iTunes and at PodcastOne.com. That's PodcastONE.com. Thanks for listening.