LadyGang - Allegedly Wassa Happening #13

Episode Date: December 25, 2018

Happy holidays from The LadyGang! Keltie, Becca, and Jac bring you another edition of Allegedly Wassa Happening to talk s**t about the celebrity gossip that you care about! Check out new episodes of LadyGang's TV show on E! every Sunday at 10:30 ET/PT on E! Follow the podcast on Instagram @theladygang and you can email Jac, Becca and Keltie at Hello [e-mail]! And check out the show page @ladygangtv!  And thank you to today's sponsors:  Amazon = Go to amazon.com/shop/ladygang to find their favorite products while keeping the podcast FREE!  LadyBox = Check out the latest LadyBox before they're all gone at www.theladygang.com/ladybox Freeform's Good Trouble = The exciting news series premires January 8th only on Freeform LaCroix = For more information join the LaCroix community at @lacroixwater or check them out at www.LaCroixwater.com MedMen = Visit MedMen today and mention the LadyGang for 10% off your order (terms and conditions apply; must be 21+; keep out of reach of children) Penguin Random House Audiobooks = Visit PenguinRandomHouseAudio.com/selfcare for more listening suggestions and to keep your sanity during the holiday season See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey guys, it's your Lady Gang, Jack Vanek, Kelty Knight, and Becca Tobin. Thank you so much for subscribing on iTunes, and thanks for supporting the great sponsors who make it possible for us to have this much fun with you every single week for free. Well, what is this? Welcome to the Lady Gang. That's amazing. Say that again. The Lady Gang. Things are about to change around here.

Each week, we catch up with Hollywood's hottest girl posse, Kelty Knight, Becca Tobin, and Jack Vanek. Hello and welcome to the Lady Gang. I'm Becky Tobin here with Jack Bannigan. Healthy night. Happy holiday. Can you still be happy for us that it's Christmas even though you're... I celebrate Christmas, you guys. Please. We've gone over this, Kelsey. I do all the things. Happy Christmas Day, everyone.

Is it Christmas Day right now? It's Christmas Day right now. Uh-uh, no way. Happy Christmas. No one's listening. I will have been in my sister's house opening presents with my niece and nephew. So cute. Where are you spending Christmas? Are you talking about the future right now?

The future. Where are you going to be, Kelty? I'm going to be here in Los Angeles. Working? Well, we work Christmas Eve, but we don't work Christmas Day. That is the dick. I know. Isn't that crazy?

That is such a bad move. You have to be at, like, CBS? Yeah. Oh, fuck. I know. It sucks. It does suck. But we usually do, like, a pretty short day.

I'm really excited because, Jack, you don't know this, but my plan for over the holidays is to redo your room at my house. I got a new rug. Oh. And, like, I'm in it because right now it's, like, all just things that I threw together, and now I'm, like, going to have a look. You're keeping my TV, right? I'm keeping your TV, yeah. I watch Love Island.

It makes me feel at home. Where will you be on Christmas, Jack? Where are you right now? Right now, I think I'm going to be in Big Bear with my parents doing a little mini ski trip. You do a lot of vacations with your parents. Are you going to be there with the boy you've been seeing? No, but I'm going to Mammoth with him over in a year. Oh.

There's a lot of skiing happening. Are you going to use your – Oh, are you going to use your ski poles that hold beer? Yes. Whiskey. I'm so excited. That is the best invention ever. Genius.

There's these ski poles. What's the name of the company? Whiskey Poles. I have no idea. Whiskey Poles. Yeah, Whiskey Poles. And it's literally ski poles. It's a flask, and you can fit eight ounces of liquor in the pole.

I want to go skiing only to use them. I know. Because it's like one of the only. It's a really good gift. I don't drink liquor really well. Guess what I wrapped up. It literally looks like ski poles.

It's in the shape of a ski pole like the one I got. No drinking liquor on the mountains, right? You have to drink liquor when you're skiing. Fireball in that pole?

I don't think that's safe. It's not. It's not. You have to drink when you ski. You have to drink liquor. You know, I'm a pretty good skier.

I was back in the day. I would love to go skiing with you guys. You know the pop guys wanted to do a trip to Mammoth with us? Yeah, I saw it. And then we were like,

nah, we're sick of you. No, in January. Oh. We should do it. We should because Because it would be really fun. I probably can't go, but you guys could go. We could choose a date that you could go.

I'm throwing a baby shower. You really don't have room for fun. I have no room for fun. Even if she does, she doesn't make it. I know. If you have room for fun, you schedule a work day instead. I clean my closet. I know.

Or she just doesn't leave her house. Well, I have Sunday off this week, and I scheduled acupuncture. Okay, there was a night when we were in New York. I just have to say this because it reminded me of that. It was like a Thursday night or something. and what each of us did that night is so our personalities you were at a play with your mom i was with the guy that i've been dating and my parents at a dive bar playing darts and kelty was working it's true is that not like all of us in a nutshell i think kelty was in her

room eating a snickers no you were working you're like i had the billboard event oh there was one night that she was like in her room by 5 p.m eating snickers yes as soon as possible thank I'm also very telty. Are you ready for Good Week, Bad Week? I'm ready. We've got to move this along, ladies. It's time for... Good Week.

Yes, it is. Bad Week. Oh, no. Okay, I'm starting. Hey, Orlita. Okay. Orlita. Here's my Good Week.

Okay. So a million lifetimes ago, I used to tour with the Trans-Siberian Orchestra. Remember, claim to fame. This is my claim to fame. And I made two of, like, my closest friends in the world, because you're living on a tour bus for months together. Oh, you guys tour on a tour bus? Yeah.

Do you get hotel rooms or no? We get hotel rooms during the day. Yeah. During the day, we'll get to the city that we're going to be playing in. We'll check into a hotel and get ready, and then we'll go to the arena. And then on the days off, we'd have hotels. But we would travel. Is that Trans-Siberian Orchestra plays arenas?

Huge arenas. Yeah, they're massive. Massive. Wait, what did you do? I was a singer and a dancer because they have those. There's six girls on each tour. So there's two tours in the U.S. each year. Wow.

I think it's six girls. And so I did that, and I got very close with these girls, Jodi and Asha. Asha played the violin like a rock star. She was like a badass, and Jodi had the greatest voice of anyone I've ever met, like truly the greatest voice. She called me today on FaceTime, and she's like, I have insane news. I was like, are you engaged? She's like, no, it's way better.

She just got hired to be Cher's backup singer on her U.S. and European tour next year Are you choking? That's amazing Isn't that amazing? On the farewell, farewell, farewell, farewell tour Yeah Is this her last tour? I heard Cher's amazing to work for

I hope so She's very loyal Oh, good Well, obviously someone left, but Yeah, I'm excited for Jodi That's nice I think she got hired for like Miley Cyrus or somebody and then got fired because like Miley was threatened.

This could be a different person, but like I remember a story way long ago that she got like fired because you can't be too much as a backup singer. You can't be too good. No, you can't be too good. And even if you are that good, you can't show it. No, you can't. You gotta hold it in. You can't be like a star.

Yeah, no. Yeah. Not at all. You can't be a Kelty. You know what I mean? Oh God. here but jody is a star so she i'm interested to see how this goes but it's gonna be amazing um you can't outshine share i guess no there's just no possible bad week is there something

happening in my hormones i've been doing nothing differently nothing my armpit hair my leg hair it's winter nipple hair it's winter yeah it's because you're getting goosies i've never had this i have never ever in my life had you're fluffing up for the season i don't but like You've never flocked for the season of like 75 degrees in LA? Yeah. Why at 32? I forgot to shave my armpits for like three days, which normally, whatever. It was disgusting.

Welcome to menopause, Becca. Is that menopause? I hope not. I mean, I'm f***ed if it is. Yeah. Good luck being pregnant. So I don't know what to do. Are you taking any vitamins?

No, it's all, my whole life is the same. I don't know what's going on. Whatever's something you're eating. I doubt it. I mean, I have been eating like a beast. Maybe it's your stress. I thought stress made your hair fall out. Yeah.

I don't know. It's probably a hormonal change. I'm like a woolly mammoth. Don't your hormones change like every second? A wildebeest. A wildebeest. Okay, Jacqueline. That's my life.

Okay, my good week. I love how for almost 200 episodes, before you start doing your good week, bad week, you always do. And then it's amazing. Because I'm getting ready. Okay, get ready, Jack. Bring it out. Bring out your good week and bad week.

My good week is I finally took the Enneagram test. oh yes what did you think i was gonna be oh um i think i thought you're what are we we're threes i thought you were gonna be nine maybe what's a nine i'm not a nine what are you i'm a seven which is what's it called i'm in screenshot sorry seven is the enthusiast um i'm the enthusiast and then i'm a lot of the individualist so the enthusiast is all like you're so excited by new things you're like really ambitious you're doing like you're going all over that actually makes sense but then the individualist is like you're super sensitive and like cynical at the same time so it's like i'm actually like the perfect

combination of both wow i'm gonna read up on you tonight and learn how to love you the best because the book i have it teaches you how to love all the different numbers oh really like Yeah, so Chris is a nine, and he really reacts poorly to harsh criticism. That's most people do. Well, he's extra sensitive. He also takes a long time to decide anything. These are also relative to you. It's true.

Even relative to me, though. Okay. It'll take Chris. He research, research, research, but I can't rush him. I want to. He has to go on his own pace. He has to go on his own pace. That's a good thing for you then.

Anyway, so I learn how to love people. How do you love him? Well, I help him. Instead of telling him what to do, I help him figure out his thoughts in his brain about all the different options. Oh, okay. Because he gets overwhelmed by options. What about for us? Yes.

So for our love language, or sorry, for our Enneagram, I can send you the list. But one of the big things is that guilt. So when we're working hard or we're really focused, when people interrupt us, it's very disturbing. And when people make us feel bad for being in a zone, like a lot of times people will be like, get out of your zone. Like, pay attention to me. But like, it's very unsettling for us.

So when people need to love us, they need to realize that sometimes we're going to have to just go into the zone and we can't multitask in that zone. And they can't be mad at us for that. I wish Zach would listen to this podcast. Does he know how to love you? Are you like that? Yeah, because the thing that's annoying is I work from home a lot of days. Yeah.

So it's like if I'm not shooting or doing a podcast or whatever, I'm home sitting at a desk doing whatever it is that I'm doing. And like I get in a zone and I can't help it that your day finishes before mine and you're coming home and you want me to instantly be in the like we're home and we're not working mode. I'm still working. Yeah. And if you guys are texting me about like work stuff, I'll really get in there on my

phone and in the zone. And to him, it's like we're just shooting the shit. Yes. And I'm like, no, we are actually working, so you are annoying the f*** out of me right now. I can multitask. In the new year, we're going to do an Enneagram episode. I think it would be amazing. Okay.

Okay. But I'll learn how to love you, Jack. Yeah, I need to, like, research it because I literally just took it. Okay. Okay. My bad week is – wait, which bad week am I in now? Well, the one that happened this week. Wink, wink.

Duh. Okay. Way to give away the secret, Jack. Asshole. we're obviously not recording this on christmas so we might be happy holidays no i'm in atlanta i'm far away from you sluts okay okay my bad week so we're in new york recently and i was at this like christmasy restaurant bar that they had like all these decorations out it was super cute and um the guy that i was with were at this like a seat that was like a u there was like three

couches and like a table in the middle so there was like not that many people there so we took the couches we're sitting there we're having a drink whatever all of a sudden these like three women come in and out of all the places to sit they sit right at our table right next to us and i'm like have you never heard of personal space this is so weird to begin with they don't ask they just sit there so we're just like all right and i kind of like move my stuff over and they're so loud so annoying so drunk then one of the women gets up walks over past us squeezes in between the table and sits in between us on top of all of our jackets she's a big lady gang fan i think no she's like an old woman not old woman but she's like in her 40s like an older

lady so old you'll be there too one day girl almost your age just like sits in between us Starts talking to her friends and without saying anything at all. It was the weirdest thing that's happened in my entire life. Did you say, excuse me, can I help you? Maybe they're huge fans of... I don't know what it was, but it was the most, like, intrusive invasion of personal space I've ever had in my entire life. And there was, like, also two other couches on the table and they all just, like, sat right up in our shit. She knew who you were.

No. That's something I would do. And just, like, not say anything? Sit in the middle? No. That's so weird. It was so odd. Did you get up and move?

We moved after, like, ten minutes. I was in shock. I'm like, what the fuck is happening? Did you throw a dart at her face? No, I should have because I would have gotten her in the eye. People are weird. Bad week. Merry Christmas.

Now Chris's gift has been opened so I can tell this story. I decided this year, Chris was like, what do you want for Christmas? What do you want for Christmas? He's like, I just really want clothes. And I was like, okay. So I go on the Nordstrom app and I bought him those classic Gucci sneakers. They're like white with the red and the green. I just thought he would like them.

words out though because it is christmas day right now um so in the nordstrom app like an idiot i just press send and i'm like order good then i'm waiting for them to come i'm like where's this no i wish where are the sneakers where are my sneakers and i even was like the neighbor i was like if you see a nordstrom box take it inside so that he doesn't find the sneakers and they're not coming so i finally open up the app i sent a thank you to a publicist once a candle from nordstrom with a little note gucci sneakers i sent a size 13 gucci sneaker to press here publicity in new york city by accident and the best part is that publicist doesn't even work there anymore so it went to her name to a place where she doesn't even work

there anymore so then i had to go on a mad hunt to get the sneakers back i sweated for two days i'm gonna have to call there i'm gonna have to say is there an orchard box it's gonna say this name can you send it back to me whatever please don't steal the sneakers they were nice they found them they sent them back chris is getting the sneakers for christmas but anyway can i just say that this is probably a very important lesson for skimming for skimming you skim everything and then by skimming you actually make 10 times the amount of work for yourself but the thing is i've done that before with revolve because just like you have like the default address that sometimes why isn't that address but still you don't if you're buying 800 900 sneakers i know i watch

chris do amazon orders and he's so you have to be thorough and thorough and for me i'm like buy with one click no it's like i don't know where it's going to europe but whatever i mean it's unbelievable my fault it is i've actually watched this year you skim and probably spend three weeks of your life fixing maybe that should be your new year's resolution i haven't made my manifest list should you just slow the down i think so you're right i can definitely slow down i i think i would like to get more organized too like i'm organized but like i'm not organized anyway okay good week um well this is a little bit old but i'm using it for today when we are in new York doing press for the show I called the paparazzi on us twice and the third day we're

there we're walking out of the building and there's paparazzi taking our picture and it caught me off guard because I pictures of me too like those people were just like standing outside of that building not the fans the paparazzi no a paparazzi took a pic because I left at a different time than you guys a paparazzi took a picture of me as well I know and they knew who i was i know i didn't call them you think i called them something with the thing that we're doing yeah they find they see they see who's going because they have really good people there like julie roberts was there last week so it's like they know people are gonna go and they that guy where did those pictures go probably on splash or something

i don't know but then probably not weekly this week who knows they could go anywhere um probably nowhere but to be honest like i was just proud because it's taking me up to a new level of fame congratulations i feel like they probably literally stand outside of that building every day and just take pictures just in case but jack no don't why are you so negative can you just celebrate us for a second celebrate us jack they because he could have gone on his lunch break at that moment it's true but he didn't during lunch he was staying there he could have i've been many places where they just don't even raise the camera i was listening to ethan hawke on armchair expert Was it Ethan Hawke?

I don't know. So random. But there's something about, like, if you are in this business for those moments. But I'm not. No, I know. But it was like, you always have to remember, like, right now, like, this is, it's great and it's amazing, but guess what? We're going to be down again.

We definitely will. It's the shittiest feeling. I know. No, it's not that far off. But we have a show on television. It's never going to be this good. We're getting asked to do the Today Show. Like, it's not going to be like this.

And I think that that's the thing that's so devastating is that it's not even that great here. No. And it only feels like a hundred times worse. I think that's a good thing about imposter syndrome, though, is because, like, you don't feel like you deserve it or it's really happening to you. So then when it goes away, you're like, eh. Do you know what's so crazy? Somebody tagged me in a video from Glee, like, some stupid Christmas episode or whatever. Like, tagged me in a video.

I never watch them. I'm like, God, I, like, lived it. I don't need to see it. But it's been years. So I, like, clicked on this link and I watched it. And I was, like, watching myself perform. And I was like, oh, my God. I, like, did not take this very seriously.

Like, I took my job seriously and I worked hard. But, like, in the moment, I didn't really realize what I was doing. Right. Like, you're on TV, and millions of people are watching you, and you're actually decent. She gave herself a decent, Jack. I was decent, you guys. In retrospect, it's nice. You were more than decent, Becca.

I was decent. Yeah. And I'm pretty proud. I'm proud of your decency, too. We're proud to be decent. I like that mantra. I'm proud to be decent. When we come back, we're going to decently run down an allegedly what's-a-happening by popular demand.

Now back to the Lady Gang. And we're back. Okay, so it is Christmas Day and we want to give you a gift, which is something you've been waiting for. And we haven't done it allegedly because we've been doing it a little bit on the TV show. But now that the TV show's on a slight hiatus, we are... Are these good to eat? Yeah, I ate them. Okay, here we go.

Are you ready, ladies? Ready. Dr. Oz has announced he has the secret to the hangover cure forever. Helpful. I hope. First off, never have two alcoholic drinks in a row. All right, I'm already... You have to have a drink and then a water.

A drink and then a water. Then I'll never get drunk. Nobody ever... You follow that... Sorry, I'm eating. You follow that for the first drink, and then you get too drunk to follow that rule. Well, I'm just letting you know. Dr. Oz is telling you...

Also, this is not, like, a new incredible discovery. People have been... Okay, anyways, continue. Okay, well, next. That was it? That's it. You're welcome. Miley Cyrus used to smoke weed regularly, but she decided to quit in the spring of 2017.

But she started smoking weed again, thanks to her mom, Tish. Because apparently, allegedly, Tish loves to smoke the ganja. Is her name not Trish? No, it's Tish. And I think it's pronounced ganja. Tish loves the ganja. It is Tish, though. It's Tish.

It's not Trish. Trish Cyrus? No, it's Tish. Oh, my God. The ganja. What is it? The ganja? Ganja.

Why do they call it ganja? I don't know, but it's not ganja. It's ganja. I don't know. Are you happy Miley's back into the weeds? I've been trying to get off the weeds. It's hard. It is hard.

It's really hard. I had a very interesting experience on weed that I'm saving. Oh, yeah. You got to save that. Oh, yeah. Okay. Great. Way to really bring it all for this episode.

It's going to be worth it whenever you get your doctor friend on here. Okay. Well, okay. Are you guys going to talk about our things at all? No. Am I just going to read these out? I realized the other day that there's very few days that go by where I don't either have a drink or smoke weed. Oh, really?

I'm on this cleanse right now. What's the cleanse? The plant paradox. Oh, yeah. I interviewed that guy. And do you think he's legit? I don't know. He told me I can't eat tomatoes, which is like the only vegetable I like.

Yeah, you can't. Because apparently there's something in the skin of a tomato. It's bad for you. I'm like a tomato. There's a lot of things in this world that are bad for you. You know what? With that attitude, you're not going to be able to do the cleanse. You can't subscribe.

So you're not eating tomatoes, but you're eating Snickers and Diet Coke for dinner. I'm not doing the plant paradox. Here's the thing. These vegetables and fruits that are off limits, essentially fruits, they're like, you're an idiot if you're eating fruit because guess what they do is they feed apes fruit to store up fat for winter. So fruit is the dumbest thing to eat unless you use it as candy. But fruit is delicious.

Well, it's delicious, but it's nature's candy. But why would God – I'm sorry, devil's advocate. Why would God put fruit on earth if we weren't meant to eat it? God puts a lot of poisonous things on earth too. There's also serial killers here. So let's go there. No, but it's this thing where the plants are actually creating defense mechanisms from being eaten by animals. This is like millions of years.

So it actually does make sense. Okay. godspeed so while you're on the plant paradox you are not doing weed or drinks no it's hard how do you sleep i barely sleep she's barely alive i can't like when we're on the plane to i cannot sleep without something to knock me out you need so bad you are also really in that tape and yes you're running that tape that you can't sleep without it yeah i did that for a while too placebo you know what you have to do that's why you said melatonin doesn't do anything for me really but taking like a pill it's a placebo effect of it and like putting on curb is like

the white noise and the familiarity of it you just have to like get over yourself a day you have to make yourself very sleep deprived for a while yeah i did that new york and did you sleep okay no slept worse i'm just so hard to be you all said someone in your bed so okay bacon for all yes the first ever bacon vending machine is located on the ohio state university campus where students are currently in the midst of studying for final exams the ohio pork council has unveiled it and you can get things for one dollar to four dollars And it's just bacon And they have to restock

The machine Four to five times a day Because Ohio State Loves their Oh it's not because it's like The bacon can go bad It's because they're selling out of it Is this nitrate free bacon

Because that causes cancer Nitrate free or nitrate And you need to check your deli meat And you need to check your hot dogs And you need to check your bacon Did you learn this in the plant parlor? No, this I've always known. No, this I've always known.

How about you just don't eat bacon? I don't really eat bacon. Bacon is delicious. If it's healthy bacon that doesn't have chemicals in it. It's still delicious. I think it's bacon in like a small plastic, like a beef jerky. Well, they have the bacon, yeah, Whole Foods where you can like buy it that's like all like bear sealed.

You buy pre-made bacon? How dumb are you? No, not me. No, I obviously don't buy any kind of food. Anyone who's listening, if you buy that stupid water that they make for $9 with the cucumbers in it or the pre-made bacon you're a hack job you're an idiot put your bacon in the microwave they have like a six dollar one piece of bacon that's like freeze like air sealed who would spend six dollars on one piece of bacon they're doing here how can they serve it is probably me

but it's only a dollar it's definitely got nitrites in it yeah careful ohio state careful would you make out with someone if you saw that right before the makeup they were eating a piece of bacon no even when zach eats like beef jerky i'm like because you know the little like threads are stuck in your teeth i need a full floss situation before that well who's kissing anyway i am okay next jennifer aniston has admitted that she loves to watch television naked obviously ew that's such a jennifer aniston thing to say doesn't her snail trout like get all over the couch isn't she cold like what do you mean cold i mean i like i don't ever wear pants at home like i'm a very pants do you wear an underwear with your pants i have an underwear i have a full

butt underwear i usually am the same and then a t-shirt or a sweatshirt depending on the season yeah i feel better about myself knowing that you girls do that because i feel like i've kind of given up on life no i'm like schmucking around it's time to schmuck around yeah i can't sleep in a pant i hate a pant sleep in a pant oh my god it gives me the worst anxiety or sock oh i don't careful i was in antarctica like camping i'm going pantsless i don't know if she's like watching tv naked on her couch where is she watching in bed maybe in bed well then just say you sleep oh you guys i need to talk about something this really really triggers me okay like in a major way i'm gonna die oh my god yeah i was watching before our final our season what is it called

Minzy's finale. Busy was on before us, and she had Kim Kardashian on. Yeah. And she asked Kim Kardashian what she sleeps in. Uh-huh. A thong and a bra. A bra? What?

I am so disgusting. Wait, do you guys remember that I slept in thongs up until like three years ago? Yes, until we told you you couldn't when we started Lady Gang. I was sleeping in a lace thong. Why? I didn't even own a thong. Carriage. Your butt little munchers are literally walking down that lace thong up into your vagina.

I can't sleep. I would rather, like, throw up on myself than sleep in a lace thong. I think people sleep in a bra when they don't want their boobies to sag. I think that's a myth. It is a myth. But, like, also, she has, I'm pretty sure, implants. So I don't think she's, like, worried about. Or can get a boob lift if they started sagging.

But, like, I am so horrified by that choice of loungewear, sleepwear. I don't even think, I mean, there's just, there's, it's not, I'm sure it is, I'm sure it's like a little like, sexy little mess, but like a thong, Kim, gross, women, stop sleeping in thongs, it's literally fecal matter, just swinging back and forth between your vagina and your butthole, I don't like it, stop it, you guys, it's disgusting, there is nothing grosser no than the joy that you learn when you buy a pair of granny panties oh like it is there's like 10 years of your life where you're like i don't own any granny panties like you're 20 yeah and then and then you turn 30 and you're like oh my god i'm gonna really lean into this

the other day i didn't have a thong available so i wore a granny panty under a jean and i was like i was like well this was a lot it was a lot as gross as like sleeping in a thong is wearing a granny panty and walking and waking life is maybe nastier no no the thong it's very hard also when you wake up the jean oh i remember like it wasn't my best moment and i was like i would have but also going commando in a jean is horrible that was my other choice yeah there's no good choice and now that i'm in my third well now that i'm 30s um i can't control my pee anymore i haven't even had a baby yet sometimes i piddle a little as i'm walking that's aggressive that He's aggressive.

Anyway. But, like, the grossest thing in the world, I just have to go back to this really quickly. You know how if you're having, if you're in this time in your cycle where you're having some discharge. Yeah. Like a nice ovulation time. If you sleep in a thong, essentially. Where does it go?

The discharge is just. Wet. Moist. It's like an ice cube maker. Melting. Like, it's like in that little pocket, that tiny little triangle. A gusset. It's a gusset.

A gusset. Just sitting there. Mm-hmm. They should make underwear that, like, take it out of the way. What, thanks? Yeah, they do. I don't think it's going to do that to your discharge, though. They should have, like, a Flobie, like the haircutting machine that you attach to your vagina during that part of the month.

So it just sucks out your snail trail and disposes of it. It's like those infant booger things. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Okay, next. Chrissy Teigen's dad got a huge tattoo of her face in honor of her 33rd birthday. It's on his, like, upper bicep, the outside. Is it good?

I personally have never seen a good, like, a face tattoo on a face or, like, also someone's face. It's never right. No. There's never a good face tattoo. It's never a good time to get your grandma Jean's face on your leg. I just love when they get fucked up. They're so funny. They are good.

Anyway. They look like a devil. So her dad got it? Yeah. Of her face. What did it say? Like, Chrissy, my dear, or something? I don't think it said anything.

I think it was just her face. My dad would never do that for me. He might. you know who's dad would jack's jack's dad would no i wouldn't my parents hate tattoos more than anything i know but if you were like dad this is what it's gonna take for me to make it in hollywood he would do it and he would film the whole thing himself i mean he would he would he would one of my tattoos was for my dad and i showed it to him and like he's a jew they don't think tattoos are good at all yeah he's still not he still was touched and cried a little he was

my parents would disown me really like as much as they loved me if i did i told you like my Like, two rules growing up was no drinking and driving, no tattoos. Like, they hate tattoos. That's so interesting. It's so weird. Okay, I have two more. But you can wear crop tops and, like, no pants as a t-shirt. Rock stars don't wear crop tops, but don't get a tattoo.

Yeah, literally. It's wild. That's great. It's odd. Odd rules. Tom Cruise is back filming Top Gun. Don't all talk at once. I thought that they were replacing him.

No, he's in it still. So then what is, like, Glenn Powell being? I don't know. They're the new recruits. The new recruits, I guess. The new cast. The new crew. Wow.

But Maverick is still Maverick. Iceman's still Iceman. Oh, see, I thought that they were like, it's not a new reboot. Like a remake. It's a continuation. Oh, I actually am more excited knowing this. What if they tried to do like a prequel? Except have you seen, wait, this is going to be mean, but not mean.

Have you seen the girl who played the lead girl lately? No. She was hot. Well, everyone do yourself a favor and Google. oh no it's not great do you think she's in it I don't

they're definitely gonna replace her with someone young they'll be like Tom Cruise will be like I'm 85 and like here's hot blonde girl

with aviator glasses who's 23 who can't act it's an Instagram model you know what I mean anyway we've all seen Tom Cruise's

three teeth though correct yeah I love that three front teeth you know what though I respect Tom Cruise he's a hustler I'm glad he didn't

get fake teeth how do you even I wonder how you'd even are those not his fake teeth How would you move the teeth over? Could you do a veneer on those and move them? You could. You could do anything, Jack.

Oh. They can literally take out all your teeth and drill new teeth into your jawbone. That's so crazy. It's called a crown. Sounds awful. I know lots of things. Yeah, my mom has one. I have one on my front tooth, too.

On your front tooth? Because I knocked it out so many times, there's no tooth left to attach a tooth to. Jesus Christ. So I have a post. Anyway, okay, next. Our friend Tan France, who's not really our friend, but we feel like he is our friend. He was on my flight home from New York. Did you say hi?

He was? Yeah. Did you say hi? No. Did you guys not have the same flight home? No. No. You should have said hi.

Why? And been like, can you want to come on Lady Gang? Here's my card. I was a garbage person. I couldn't say hello. Oh. Anyway. I could never say hello to a celebrity I didn't know.

Guess what he revealed the Queer Eye guys fight the most over. Ooh. What? No guess. Food. Nope. Who's going to drive? Riveting.

No. But they do. I think they probably do decide that. But they fight the most over who's late. They get really mad at each other. And then one person will be late. And then the next, they'll be like ousted. And then the next day, the person who ousted them about being late will be late.

Oh, so it's not like one person. No, it's not always late. And also, they also, he also gave a big secret. They all share a trailer still. How is that possible? Because they're on, like, in the middle of Louisiana or whatever. And they all have one share. They don't, there's not enough room for five trailers.

Isn't that interesting? I have my own trailer on set. on glee yeah but also on location oh you did canada i've never not had my own trailer never on glee you didn't share never and how big was your trailer i had a full size no trailer no yeah same size as everybody there's like a couch bed situation wow you're so famous well everyone had the same size trailer but we all had our own wow that's so nice when i was on sharknado i had a trailer and it was like the size of an outhouse it was not great like an actual character on sharknado yeah it was a reporter how many lines did you have like three

i think they cut i can't believe they gave you a trailer you have to you think it's like the rules yeah i think so anyway okay last one chloe and kylie allegedly want to get pregnant again together soon cool i mean it's not exciting anymore i know it's like the kardashian like reproduction situation happy for them but like it doesn't thrill me it's too long i need to live it closer to when it happened you mean because of their show it's too hard for me to live six months later they can edit that up quickly they added our show up i know they do wait a long time i wonder why they save it all up do you think it's because they need to like figure out a storyline so they like wait until they can kind of like i think probably what it

is is they don't want people to this is so speculate speculatory but they probably don't really want people to know what's happening in their lives in the moment while it's happening so it's easier to shoot it and to be able to control what people see right and then live it get through it and then you get to show it when you're like i got cheated on had a baby in the same day let me process this yeah figure out how i want to like approach it yeah that does make sense because that's like a lot especially that situation yeah do you think they watch all the episodes i bet they do no because if they watch the episodes then they would watch us and they would be tweeting us about how great we are no they have a half an hour between their show and

And they would not be tweeting about us. I think if they really liked us, they would tweet about us. I'm waiting for Kris Jenner to be like, way to go, lady gang. Could she be her mom already? I don't know. It would be so great. We need you. Anyway, on that note, the show's over.

We're not going to do Ask the Lady Gang. Oh, sweet. We don't have time. I ran out. Chrissy Teigen's dad took the, you know, the zhuzh. Because it's Happy Holidays, do you want to go around the table and wish everyone a Happy Holidays from us? Yeah.

Because it's Christmas. Merry Christmas, everyone. And if you're listening to this because you escaped your home and your family, good for you. I'm probably doing the same thing right now. Yeah. Happy holidays. We got through 2018 together. We did it.

By the skin of our teeth. By the skin of our... Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. Dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick. Dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick. Okay. How do we sign off this again? Just see you next Tuesday.

Oh, yeah. Ready? One. Follow us at The Lady Gang, at Kelty, at Becca, at Jack Vanek. You can hit us up and sign up for our newsletter on theladygang.com. And we will see you next Tuesday. Yay! Woo!

Yay! Woo! Join the Lady Gang every Tuesday at iTunes and at podcastone.com. That's podcastone.com. Thanks for listening.