LadyGang - Allegedly Wassa Happening #7

Episode Date: November 21, 2017

In another exciting edition of Wassa Happening, the ladies tackle the latest news topics of the day including Taylor Swift's decent haircut, Seth Rogan using make up, Nico Tortorella's polyamorous relationship, Britney Spears' painting career, Rita Ora going undercover as herself, Brooklyn Beckham's relationship status, and more! See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey guys, it's your Lady Gang, Jack Vanek, Kelty Knight, and Becca Tobin. Thank you so much for subscribing on iTunes, and thanks for supporting the great sponsors who make it possible for us to have this much fun with you every single week for free. Well, what is this? Welcome to the Lady Gang. That's amazing. Say that again. The Lady Gang.

Things are about to change around here. Each week, we catch up with Hollywood's hottest girl posse, Kelty Knight, Becca Tobin, and Jack Vanek. Hello, hello, hello, and welcome to the Lady Gang. I am Rebecca Martin. Whoa. Oh, boom. Cool.

I'm just kidding. I'm Becca Tobin. Is your middle name Grace? Yeah. That's what I thought. Rebecca Grace. Across from me, 1994 name. Well, my great-grandmother's name was Grace, before you start calling me a stripper.

Kelty Knight across from me. What's your middle name? Colleen. Okay. Oh, right, because you used to go by Kelty Colleen. Yeah. to my right is jack what's your middle name again peteris moon star peteris that sounds like an std it's my mom's maiden name oh she's offended hey mom hey mom she doesn't listen anymore the question

for over the week is what bridge do you not regret burning oh that's so good do you have one in mind i have so many okay go go i don't know if i can talk about mine is it your ex oh no but i don't regret burning that at all so that's fine you can burn that's yours yeah with your eggs yeah did you burn it i didn't burn a bridge no i'm talking about like a time that you could have walked away gracefully but instead you like dropped the mic did something shitty or like dropped the mic or like you know what i mean i like on it i'm not that kind of person to do that like i get a number one i like when i get angry i don't get angry i get sad and then i like crawl into myself and then i am like too lazy to do crazy shit so too lazy to be crazy to be crazy

i don't know if i've ever done anything like that okay i know mine it's so good um a pr house invited me to their like okay so in la these public like publicity companies they'll have these big like you come see everything so like i took the time off on a wednesday night and i went to your stupid pr house and i walked around and let you give me all the brands or whatever and they just wanted to be able to say like this girl from this press outlet came and they had this beautiful brand of dress and while i was there i was like oh my gosh i would love to wear this during award season they're like yeah yeah for sure like of course anything you want just hit me up and then like of course award season came around and i hit the person up i was like hey can

i have this dress and she was like let me check and she goes back to the brand they're like they're just so selective with who they were dressed this was not gucci people this is like a brand you would be so lucky with the amount of press i get during award season so f you you know what i mean you don't want like 15 sites to put me on their best dress list like f you so anyway so she wrote me back and she was like hey um i'm so sorry like they're just so selective um with what they um they'll dress and i should have written back and been like okay thanks for checking like keep me posted and i just wrote got it period and sent it and then every other time that like that pr companies ever come up like they will not respond to me and it's fine good for you i actually had

something similar there's something really shitty about pr people in los angeles because their job is to get the most famous people to like wear the thing that they're like working for whatever brand or whatever um and also there's these people in los angeles who their job is to throw events for the brand. They get paid to do that. And I'm an idiot. And I didn't realize that all of my friends were getting paid to go to certain events where I was going for free. And like my friends that were being paid, it wasn't Gwyneth Paltrow. I mean, she's not my friend, but like people like on your level or not even, you know what I mean? Yeah. So finally I was like, you know what? I am not one to discuss money. Like that's the job of like your agent or your manager, your lawyer,

or whatever. I get very uncomfortable. But I finally got an email from this one girl who was basically getting me there for free and paying my friends. Wouldn't it have been decent for her to be like, hey, I'm paying this person this much. Do you want to come? You can also get paid this much. She just thought we would never talk about it. F you. So I get another email for the eighth invitation of the week. And I was like, hey, I don't mind supporting you. And I'm happy with with these brands to support as well but i find it to be very unfair that people are making money off of attending these events so unless you have a budget for me to come to these events please stop inviting me yeah and she never went back drop yeah that's good well she didn't but

you know what i'm just so sick of like being the nice person no i mean way overrated few people would refer to me as that person, but I am kind of a pushover in those situations. No, for sure. I get it. Well, especially in Hollywood and shit. Yeah, it's bullshit. And also, like, how many times are you going to get Gwyneth Paltrow at your event? None.

And how many times when she does an Instagram story are that many people going to look at it? Yeah. Like, I mean, I don't know. I'm just saying. Like, you would have been lucky to have me wear your dress on National Television. And you would have been lucky to pay me a couple dollars to come to your stupid party. Yeah, and it's not like I wanted to-

Nobody's paying me for anything. Cool. All right. Great. Okay. So, bridges burned. Moving on. And now it's time for Good Week.

Yes, it is. Bad Week. Oh, no. Healthy Go. I'm going first because it has been the goodest week and the baddest week. All right. Do you want? I'll let you pick.

Sophie's Choice. I want the baddest. I want the baddest. Yeah, it's not Sophie's Choice. So, okay. Have you ever seen that movie? No. Don't tell me now.

Well, let me just say it's not a win-win. It's not a win-win. Okay. It's a lose-lose always. Okay. So this week I was very, very honored that Josh Duhamel let me do his first interview since his split with Fergie. And I don't take these types of things lightly. Like if I'm talking about your stupid whenever, whatever, like I'll mess around.

But like I know he's a public person. I know that it's going to go everywhere once he talks about his divorce. It's the first time. And so we go to this event and I sit down with him and I start interviewing him. And I was like – before the interview starts, I grab his hand. I was like, listen, like I got you. I'm going to keep you safe. like i'm not gonna embarrass you like do not worry like trust me he starts crying like bawling

during the interview like he starts talking about her i guess people have been mean to fergie online about like her being a bad parent or something and he starts defending her and he's like air yeah it aired like this week he was like he was like she's just a great mother and then he just like can't talk he stands up he like walks out of the camera he like punches his fist like get it together man comes back in he just has like his whole self is like wet with tears i have never felt more like a snaky disgusting leech of the media than i did in that moment yeah even though i think i did a beautiful piece on him that was so respectful and like ps fell more in love with him because it was like he was so emotional it was so sweet and so human but like wow i felt like

such a dirty whore yeah like just being like tell me more like i should have been like when he walked away i'd be like we're good like cut the tape but i was like come back let's talk more like oh my god i'm a horrible person he could have very easily or somebody else could have stepped in like his publicist and been like yeah this is enough didn't bring a publicist he didn't well i mean maybe that he needed to do that it's probably like he was gonna do it with somebody regardless right he probably knew what how it was gonna be obviously anyway i was very sad about it that's horrible good week sat down with kim k yeah and here's the thing i know neither of you or elena care about kim kardashian i care more about her than beyonce to be honest

yes i care about the kardashians i just don't care about beyonce right okay so i will say this today i posted like um a picture of like me and kim or whatever for our interview and like i had people from high school reaching out being like you've really made it no like no people you have been at the office i have been with julia roberts and george clooney and jennifer lawrence like yeah I saw a bunch of people commenting on Facebook. You've really made it. You're really famous now. I'm like, God damn it.

Anyway, she's lovely. And here's the thing. Kim's fucking cool. She's cool. And she's beautiful. And she's super chill. And she's definitely my favorite Kardashian. And she's just like, she's really nice.

I think the whole media around her is like so weird. She's actually just like cool. I would be nice too if I had everything that she has. No, no, no. But the others are not as nice. That's the thing. it's not courtney she's not no sorry i'm just saying you know i feel for courtney i feel like i would be the courtney of the sisters and like i'm sorry i just don't think you have to be so

nice to people you don't owe them anything okay becca who's going next i'll go um okay good job what nothing um does that make you the chloe you're the candle you're the candle no i don't think i'm anybody you're the kylie entrepreneur no okay um my good week is so i've talked about like using weed for the period stuff and i have the worst insomnia in the freaking world like can't sleep at all so i like i'm like you know what i'm gonna give weed one more time to help me fall asleep you want a chance i've smoked so many times and every time i smoke i sit in a corner and have an anxiety attack and i can feel my legs twitching like it's just bad all the time you smoke too much no i just well here's the thing so i got i got a vape pen yeah and i got your favorite

did you also get a fedora yes i'm vaping in my fedora when i got a pen but it is amazing and it knocks me out like in a second like it opens a whole world of dating of dating because now you can date all the people that vape i still hate weed like i hate it i mean like everybody can you know smoke whatever they want but it's like i don't want to date like a stoner you just want to vape i just want to vape before bed i'm only vaping while i'm in bed when it's dark out and anyway so it knocks me out it's great so transitioning into my bad week i was recently in arizona with a friend of mine and we went out with her guy friend and he was super nice and he was uh he like bought us all dinner it was awesome we were like back at his apartment watching a

movie and he's like oh i have these weed chocolates i'm like well i'm like a eat weeder oh no we a weed eater so i'm like i'll have one whatever okay i don't really like know how much weed isn't like any of these things so i'm just like i'll just eat it no amateur so i eat the weed chocolate and i knock out like in two seconds like i am out cold can't open my eyes it's over and then i wake up like an hour later and i was like i went to bed like kind of like laid down on the couch i went woke up like an hour later this guy was like massaging my feet oh was it harvey weinstein whoa wait yeah so what do you was the guy you were like no it was like a friend of my girlfriends that we're staying with and i was like this is so freaking weird like so what did you say to him

no i just like pulled my feet away and we left you're like i hate feet no well i love my i love getting my feet massaged by like somebody i'm into but not like maybe you were like kind of like freaking out or something i don't know i don't think so that's so weird it was so i don't so weird that story violated but yeah we left him that story yeah what it kicked him in his face so what have you learned jack don't eat weed chocolates thank you yeah i mean come on this is not your first video shame her you were on the work not her fault jamie you were like on the warp tour as a child you're like drew barrymore you should know that like you don't do drugs with strangers that's like the first rule of drugs guys i wasn't smoking weed on warp tour okay fine

i was taking fireball shots and giving bjs okay so my good week is um my christmas movie aired yeah thank you thank you thank you thank you um the people that came out of the woodwork like to tell my parents how excited they were we had no idea people cared more about this hallmark movie than they ever cared about glee 100 people love hallmark it's so weird christmas and so it's those two things together it just brings out people's emotions it's true and they love me it's like a trifecta you know just kidding um and i did like the hallmark home and family talk show leading up to it you looked great oh thanks guys but it just was like it was kind of fun i normally never ever ever ever watch anything i do and in this case i had to because i had to live tweet whatever um

But I, I mean, of course I like hated myself 80%, but that 20% felt pretty good. Good for you. Thanks guys. It's on my DVR. I'm watching it on Friday night. Merry Christmas. I have a date with myself. Merry Christmas.

My bad week is I'm on day like 14 of the whole 30 and I want to basically shove my face into a pizza pie and die there. Do you always call pizza, pizza pie? A pizza pie. I am so upset about the, I thought, I, this is the longest I've ever gone without a drinking alcohol, B having sugar other than fruit or C not eating a carb. How do you even go out to dinner? It's actually not that difficult, but like, I'm ready guys.

I'm ready, but I can't quit in halfway. I'm sorry. You have to do 30 days. Yes. Okay. I'll do it with you. I won't. so after this podcast night you've been like 17 mini reese's pieces right now

it's time okay well what's coming up is allegedly what's happening we've got news to talk about yes we do i hope i know what it is okay what's going on now here's the lady gang our guest today is us welcome to what's happening but First, we got a very special note. Oh, great. Hello. My girlfriend is a religious follower of your podcast, and I was wondering if there was any way you could give her a shout out on one of your upcoming podcasts.

Her name is Sarah Benson, and she's turning 24 on November 28th. I've already ordered her a fancy as fuck lady box and would really appreciate a mention to her on your podcast or a message to her on her birthday on her Instagram at Sarah Benson. I hope you guys see this and can make her day even more special. Sincerely, her loving boyfriend, Greg Winslow. Greg! You're the best boyfriend I've ever seen.

What'd you do, Greg? Yeah, Greg. Did you cheat on her? Wait, should we have said that he got her a lady box? That's okay. It might be a surprise, but Sarah getting a lady box. Sarah, you need to keep this man. Oh my gosh.

How thoughtful to find the email, to even email us, and then most thoughtful... Sarah. We got her the box. And then, I know, and then her loving boyfriend is, like, very sweet. He is just the best. He's a keeper. Greg, and what's her, Sarah Benson? Sarah Benson.

Everybody write Sarah Benson on November 28th and wish her a happy birthday. Happy birthday. And tell her her boyfriend's the best. Just a good guy, Sarah. Cute. So when we do all the Ask the Lady gangs and you're like, oh, this guy, like, this is what you need. You need a Greg.

Yeah. Keep that. Yeah. Greg needs to be, like, our code word for, like, a good guy. Yeah. Get yourself a Greg. Get yourself a Greg. Get yourself a Greg.

Oh, my gosh. What? Is it? Greg is a nickname for a wiener. Elena is saying off camera. In what country? Yeah, I've never heard that. In America?

Is it a nickname for a wiener? A wiener? A penis. Google that right now. I don't believe. Have you ever heard a wiener? No. I heard a Johnson.

But I actually think that's even better. Get yourself a Greg. Get yourself a Greg. With a good Greg. A Greg with a good Greg. A Greg with a Greg. Get yourself a Greg with a good Greg. So there's lots of, ladies, there's lots of news to talk about this week.

Oh my God. I am very nervous because I know nothing about Bob. Our opening story is about Nico Tortellini. Oh, I know what this is. What is it? He has a girlfriend. No, he doesn't. This isn't the news I was thinking.

He's had the same girlfriend. Nico Tortellini is on people.com, opened up about his girlfriend, Bethany Myers, and revealed her family does not support the couple's polyamorous relationship. Okay, number one, that's been his girlfriend for forever. For a long time, he talked about her on a podcast. Yes, and I had stalked his Instagram. Me too. She's got a hot body.

Yeah, she's a Pilates instructor. Okay, so it's not news. it's just an excuse for us to talk about nico i'm getting all flustered what's a polyamorous relationship they have other partners yeah but everybody's okay with it yeah so that sucks okay well nico we miss you come back i love you nico come back um okay next now that i'm single i'll hook up with you maybe you could get into that relationship with them i could i'm way too jealous no she can't she can't it's too hard maybe you can have a one-off okay britney spears has added a hyphen to her list she is now a painter a painter she sold a

painting a watercolor for ten thousand dollars is it any better than like george bush's paintings of dogs oh my god remember that yes the painting is remedial at best but i would say that i went to a painting night and did a similar flower pattern oh it's one of those wine and paint classes? No, it isn't. No, it's not a wine and paint. She, like, did it, but it's like, when you can't paint, you do flowers and petals. Yeah. Wait, should we go to... Should we go to

a wine and paint class and then auction off our painting? We should do, like, a lady gang event at a wine and paint class. I'm sorry, Becca, but if you forgot, you and your friend Kelty went to a wine and paint night. We did do this. And we painted cars. And mine was amazing.

Why wasn't I invited? I forget where you were. Oh, no, you were too sassy. They didn't want you to come remember what oh yeah your brand it was an event for a company straight people you never told me about this it was for straight people straight no you're you're it was too conservative your brand was too sassy yeah too sassy you guys never told me about this oh i didn't i'm offended you missed nothing i love wine and paint classes it wasn't what you thought it wasn't what you thought okay more news april the giraffe might be pregnant again who's oh is that the one Next, next, next, next.

Do you know what that was? Did you ever watch it? I hate animal news. Wait, no, no, no, no, no. Didn't they have like a 24-hour camera and then she didn't give birth for like months? People are just waiting for her to give birth. I mean, I'll look at photos of animals a lot. No, that's not even true.

Next. No, but here's the thing about April the giraffe. Animal news is lame. I like this. Let's talk about it. Is that every time you went on Facebook, it was like, April's about to give birth. And then it was, she didn't give birth. clicked on it and you're like oh i want to see this and you waited 10 minutes and then you read

the comments and people are like i've been watching this for three months anyway she might be they should have turned on the camera when she was actually giving birth but you don't know everybody don't know she can't speak english and be like i'm feeling contraction i'm sure they can tell when she's going to give birth well i got all into it i was like i think you can see the stomach move that's a contraction i wouldn't mind watching a giraffe give birth to be honest but you should have watched the live news was not good okay that was a great news story um thank you stellar journalism thank you um seth rogan admitted to using his wife's concealer to cover up a pimple i love seth rogan

you know i think a lot of men do do this yeah i've done it for a minute i gotta be honest zach had one on our wedding day and i'm so pissed that i didn't see him that day and that nobody in his circle was like let me just put a little whatever on your face because he could have used it no well at least there's face too yeah but like you know i think it's fine when men do that i do too i mean don't like contour your face and i like that seth rogan used his wife's i mean you know that those guys get like professional grooming before events like he paid someone five thousand dollars to groom his hair but like she didn't bring a concealer but he can't buy a $24 concealer.

What's wrong? Well, the Taylor Swift record came out. Now that the Lady Gang is very... Divided. Did you know that there is a Lady Gang loves Taylor Swift? I'm in it. Because I'm a secret Taylor Swift lover. I love her now that she's gone away.

Well, now that she's back. I don't know. I loved her when she was gone. That was my favorite Taylor Swift when she was not here at all. When I didn't hear her name. i loved i i was a backup dancer i loved taylor swift i loved speak now and i loved fearless and i loved red and i loved red a little bit red was great because it was still country yeah 1989 i even liked i didn't like it first and then i got into it this record we thought she was annoying

with some of the media practices but you got to give it to a woman that can send a million records in her first week yeah you gotta give it up to her i do i did not like the first couple singles but new year's day i'm into it i haven't listened to it i haven't heard a word of note um one the thing i like about taylor swift is she secretly writes all this other music and then like doesn't say a word on it i was watching the cmas and she won i don't know if it was uh best song or whatever for a little big town and it's like you don't even know she's writing all these hits and Hits for others. No, she can write songs.

She's great. Yeah, she writes good country songs. I wish she'd go back to country, but that's just me. I don't like it when she dances. I don't either. Because she can't dance. I don't need her to. Stay in your lane, Tay.

She's a flail-y string bean. But I don't even want, like, you're so talented, I don't need you to gyrate. No, you can play the guitar and, like. Just sing your songs and play your guitar and be beautiful. Like, I don't need, like, a center plie, grand plie, gyration of the vat. I think she's also finally nailed a haircut that doesn't look like a soccer mom. It's cute. finally what the 80s like

bang yes it's like edgy everything else that she's had has been like oh I gotta pick the kids up at six from soccer practice and pick up some Boston market I have a question is her album actually available on like it's only I have radio or by the time this airs it will be I'm

not buying it until it's oh it's for like a week somewhere else because I don't want it on Apple I don't use Apple I need it on the Spotify playlist well Taylor anyway so congrats we love you taylor does not care what we think no the thing is is that the lady gang loves taylor swift group gets upset why because the lady gang is really mean well we used to we used to bash no i think she's talking about the facebook group so let's all just go easy

on taylor swift let's support a girl who's just chasing her dream chasing her dream you know she's really sad that people are talking shit on her and she doesn't care she's literally wiping her ass with hundred dollar bills right now she doesn't care thousand dollar bills do they make million dollar bills i know who cares rita aura went to the europe vmas european vmas weirdest news stories i have something to share about rita aura i don't even know what she does i don't either but i had a great idea the other day have you ever heard of parties where you go in and there's someone there to like they're like go get your aura red yeah like a reiki yeah they can they'll be like your your aura is yellow and that means whatever

i think that someone is really missing out or a reader on the opportunity to call themselves rita aura and they read auras or rita aura does it and it's rita aura aura rita aura reader reader it's like a rita aura or a palindrome yes i want to be an aura reader and i'm gonna call myself rita aura is that my drag name no and then i'm like you're yellow honey yes i think i don't know anything interesting happening other than her new career of reading auras what's happening well she wore a bathrobe to the on the red carpet her we didn't somebody else do that to you no rita aura she wore a white bathrobe and a whole bunch of diamonds cool and then her head in a towel with a diamond oh i did see that picture that was it and then

a louboutin diamond encrusted heel you know what i love someone that just needs attention the way i do do you know what i mean like you don't wear your bathrobe to the european music awards if you don't want to be like i'm not doing much right now but i need you to talk about me yeah yeah she did the same thing like 10 years ago i was at the vmas and she wore this like insane i was like i don't even know who that is but the dress is amazing so sometimes your dress makes the man I feel like somebody should have a theme party Like bathrobes and diamonds I love

My favorite look is when you get ready And you get full glam And you're still in your bathrobe It is a good look Why not have a party Where everybody's just in a bathrobe Let's do it Maybe when we throw our birthday party

Come to my birthday party Are you paying? I'm still not coming There's a new nail trend in Hollywood The hairy selfie nail what have you seen it you paint your face on your nail is she looking it up elena is googling oh god and then you take some of your hair and you glue it to the top that's gross and okay these nail trends there's no way anybody's actually doing them like somebody's doing the boob nails and

the vagina nails and the pimple popping like that's just like for shock here it comes oh ew god that's so gross it's disturbing what about if you have to like eat food what if you have to wipe your ass or do anything in life you gotta admit it's a 10 out of 10 on artistic it's definitely well she didn't do that herself i'm not ew that is so creepy creepy i know but they even have like oh it's a moving one okay anyway no that's too creepy next topic next topic oh i guess so chloe grace moretz and brooklyn beckham are back together do you know who those are jack i know who chloe is because i think she's super cute but i don't and brooklyn beckham the david beckham's son i don't care i'm more i'm more into the beckham

that sings victoria spike no the son the little one and he has like an amazing voice really little is yes 12 13 oh he's really good okay but back to chloe and brooklyn you don't feel like why they were together all the time and then they broke up and then he like kind of was seen with other people and then they like got back together why they break up i don't know i want to i don't and i don't i mean they're how old 13 oh god they're like 22 are they i always see them as like or her is like 13 yeah i think she's real cute she's super cute i loved her in neighbors too i loved her she had a very short role on 30 rock did she yeah she was alec baldwin's like niece or something nice okay that's all i know we're from um the mindy project has officially

ended oh no do you like it i love mindy you do i do love her i love her and i think the way she like writes for women because she's a woman and she's very funny is just so good she's so good like yeah the show's great and wasn't it canceled and then re-picked up on hulu yeah i like that she had that comeback too and she really she yeah and the one on hulu was able to be edgier yeah it was really cool no i love that show that's sad but how many seasons was it like six a lot a lot like it's time no it's time you don't want to go on forever i know people that have worked for her and they say she's the most amazing pleasant human she seems rad yeah i wish we could get her on one day mindy please call me mindy now that you have time um moving on the world beard

and mustache championship happened this week please google it elena and show the girls what i'm talking is it like a long beard competition no it's like where these men grow these insane beards and mustaches and then they like put them in like different amazing shapes and formations and like i guess you have to grow it and there's like all these different categories like a dog show it's not one of those it's amazing oh my god yeah oh my god those are cool all of them i don't like it would you make out with someone who was growing out to compete in the world beard championship i hate a big beard like that yeah no i think it's disgusting what do you think of a soul patch gross this is even worse oh my it covers it in his entire face what do you think

of a goatee no no do you like a lamb chop what's a chopstick drop a chop uh lamb chop yeah a lamb chop no no um what about someone who like no that's gonna be sensible now like it like like just one thin line do you like a little scruff i love scruff i always like i like a lot of scruff i like a little scruff i don't like a beard or mustache ditto two last things a company just gave non-smokers six extra days off to compensate for cigarette breaks in japan if you are a non-smoker you get six additional days off because they're like it's not fair because you're not taking smoke breaks and these people who are i don't know i'm just saying i mean that's nice i guess it's a cool like initiative to stop smoking but i feel like

everybody probably takes the same amount of breaks yeah you're taking a poop break you know taking a snack break speaking of i have been pooping so much on the whole 30 i've pooped four times today no it's four lucky times i'm so efficient i'm like a lamborghini you're like kelsey that has her like 5 p.m poop yeah kelsey every time we come in it's so strange it's like 4 p.m and at 5 p.m on the dot she runs out of the bathroom and she's like sorry it smells it's just like such a random time to poop it's like i feel like every 5 p.m it's weird it's so weird but i have a question doesn't it upset you when i was on my cleanse no like when you're pooping that much you're like that has been inside me this whole time like no that's not how poop

works it's this whole time like what that whole time your last meal no but like okay before you a colon cleanse colonic listen before you were doing whole 30 yeah you were pooping once a day now that you're doing whole 30 are you eating that much more you're pooping way more more is coming out and less is sitting in your intestine i guess you're right i'm cleaning out the intestines and i guess when you're not cleaning them out it gets it sits there and hardens i thought about my first the other day well my first thought about it or you got i was thinking about it i got one after a juice cleanse it was not pretty i love a colonic i don't like it it feels really weird and you don't like the feeling but don't you feel so good after no i felt a little bit violated

me too you have something up your butt that's like pulling out stuff anything inserted in my butt feels like a violation it's a weird yeah well maybe you are into the wrong person where did she rub your belly with castor oil and like really make it comfortable no but that sounds even more weird i don't want anyone rubbing my belly with something in my butt if something is going in my butt you had your colonic gone like i don't want to be in the room i was you went and just like free ball the colonic she i also she inserted and then like i don't think she sat next to me and watched oh she didn't oh my i think you're supposed to i think she did then i don't know there's two different kinds there's like a flushing yeah i know what you mean they have to

fill your pressure and then they see on the dial when there's too much pressure and then they release it and that's when you feel like you're gonna throw up a little bit but that's when all the poop goes out it's i kind of want to get one now should we do it we should do a podcast if something is going in my butt i want to be in a dark room alone and feel like there's no one there like i will say the small talk during a colonic is like an all-time high of awkwardness it's like when i get my bikini wax but worse just worse but worse because it's like because there's not something in your butt when you're getting a bikini because i feel like bikini wax like she's seeing so many vaginas i guess this girl's seeing a lot of buttholes too

yeah there's just something that's just next level about something being inserted inside it's a file you've been yeah penetrated and it's a violation it's a sexual act okay well on that note i think we're gonna put a period this uh what's happening what's happening we're not getting clonics this week um when we come back it's just us still funky ask the lady gang and we're back and before we start ask lady gang if you guys want 20 off of jack vanek.com use code lady gang and i have a lot of holiday fun things on my website that you need to get all your friends can i please interrupt you for a minute like i always do yeah um we need i forgot to talk about something very important do you believe in ghosts yes i don't

know i would like to see one though like i don't know what are we out jack i know but like i'd like it's like i'd really what i really want to see is show yourself but i want to see a ghost have you heard of elena is saying no are you scared you don't believe in ghosts she's scared i'm i say that i believe in them because i don't want a ghost to be like bitch you don't believe in me and then guess what i'm gonna haunt you for you are so crazy well they're hearing this now she knows that you're is that how you think about god okay so listen dear david is this guy's instagram yes i know whatever and he has a haunted house a haunted apartment apartment that he lives in and he's been able to like take pictures and it's

freaky because it looks like a tiny baby with a deformed head wait elena's gonna show you no look this is bullshit so we take oh i haven't seen the pictures of the act that is such bullshit no look that is what is that that is bullshit that is bullshit look at that's not what a ghost looks like but how do you know it doesn't look like a human doll that is not see-through but why would this guy to go to all this trouble because he's because he's created a huge viral buzz about it yeah it's bullshit i think it could be true okay well most of the pictures are like such bullshit it's like i took this one photo of my hallway and then i took another one and then It's all dark, and they're like, well, you could do that because you took a flash, or

you could just Photoshop the... It's so stupid. It's like so dumb. Nicole's asking. Okay. And that's the dumbest picture of a... I could Photoshop a better ghost. Ooh.

Challenge accepted. And maybe my apartment's going to be haunted next week, so I can get a bunch of more followers. Maybe we could get more followers. I know. Should we talk about this office, this studio being haunted? Yeah, because it'll freak Elena out. elena's like i love all the ghosts in here because they don't sometimes i do ask orly if she sees a ghost because sometimes she does get a little bit like staring off into the distance and i feel like

maybe there's a ghost that's the thing that his cat was doing like every night at like 1001 and the cat would go stand by the door and like the baby can't even tell time that's ridiculous the baby that shows up at 1001 i can't even tell time i mean there's there's a flaw in the story well maybe maybe it's a universal time that we don't tell also maybe that's maybe it definitely would have changed times on daylight savings so that's why it's bullshit what like it would come at 901 then you guys can i say something about daylight savings i freaking hate it oh the cutest thing in the world paula abdul posted something on instagram being like don't forget to set your clocks back oh paula i was like she's like the world's world's mother or something no why is

she's so amazing she's so cute you know she's like my i know she's your person i saw her like last week but my piece hasn't there yeah and then she i she remembered me she goes i was like paula it's me and then she was like i'm so glad you're here kelty and she's like you never told me what i thought you thought of the show because you know she played the hollywood bowl and i like sat in the front row and like lived every moment and then i was like well paula that's because a i don't have your phone number which i would want b i don't have your email which i would want and see you didn't invite me backstage after the show so like don't act all nice now paula don't be like you never tell me what you thought well where when i was walking in my car at the staff parking at

the hollywood ball you could have tweeted her like when was i gonna tell you oh my god are we dming like what's happening anyway she was very sweet and then i told her all of what i really thought of the show and that's so funny when when would i wear but that's what i mean people are like oh my god i haven't seen you that's like a real stalker thought it's a real stalker thought that went through your mind. Paula Abdul is so small. I know. I took a photo next to her.

Oh, yeah. We're the same size. It's amazing. And she has... Actually, I think I would be a massive giant. Yeah, I think a little bit. I think she's like 5'1".

She has such a tiny little ponytail. It's so beautiful. Like, it's thin hair? No, it's just like, it's perfect. Like, how is your ponytail so perfect? She has somebody

professionally do it for her. I have people professionally do my ponytail. It doesn't look that good. She's just a special, special person. Honestly, I feel like Paula, I'm just going to say,

does not get the respect she deserves she doesn't she's a freaking icon she's the beyonce of our generation not our beyonce that i like don't age me like that oh fine of the 40 to 45 yeah don't age me either straight up now tell me what the question is jack okay we're i don't okay i haven't read or pre-read these so they might be really bad do you have to say do you read the other ones i haven't read it these pre-read a pre-read i usually do okay sometimes they're like they're wordy they're worded wrong it's hard to read okay insult our listeners like this nicole first question nicole says my boyfriend and i have been dating for a few years and he is honestly the first guy who

my friends and family love and he's always treated me great however a few months ago his roommate had a party when i was out of town a girl passed out in my boyfriend's bed he had been drinking for about eight hours at this point period sorry he stayed up until 5 a.m and then ended up making out with her when he went to bed hours after her. She tried to get him not to tell me, but he felt too bad and finally did. He has done everything to make it up to me and

has even offered going to counseling to get my trust back. Am I being an idiot by staying with him or do people make mistakes and can we get through this? Roll the tape. Wait, also I'm not done. Also, it was 100% a one-time thing. He has blocked her

on everything, so I'm not worried about him having a secret affair well unless he has a secret instagram where he's still following her roll the tape number one who is giving you this information he was drinking for approximately eight hours he sat with her for five hours and then made out with her whose timeline is this is this his recollection roll the tape they might have been actually making out for five hours they also might have had sex you don't know yeah i this is a no for me would you dump him yes yep yeah i think that people who cheat will always cheat always yeah and i'm gonna get so much shit for saying that but like no no and no get out nicole also nicole no wait what's the

girl's name nicole no oh the other girl next also side chick convenient that you just passed out in your boyfriend's her boyfriend's bed i've been to a party or two in my day you know how you get up to the bedroom you don't walk up there by yourself and say oh i think i'm gonna find this perfect bed no amanda you can be in my bed it's fine come to my room yeah i'll show you the way put that bitch on the floor with a pillow and a blankie okay yeah don't put her in your bed yeah roll that tape girl i don't know that whole thing is weird no no get out dumb cheater him cheater find yourself a greg oh get yourself a greg with a good greg would never do that greg would literally never do that i mean greg could have literally like had sex with her mom and that's

why he's doing all these nice things that's true i hope that's not the case i don't think it is if your guy writes us a letter explaining his side of the story and buys you a fanciest lady box we might forgive him yeah but not until that's the only way you're getting forgiven okay anyways our next question i'm sorry that happened to you by the way yeah that's really shitty sophia size but you don't accidentally make out with anyone you don't yeah i don't care how much you've been doing but sometimes you do get an accidental foot massage that hasn't aired yet oh wait yesterday oh yeah yesterday anyways okay next question comes from oh god we think we're so funny we're off the rails traumatizing

okay i'm hot next question comes from sophia all the people left their names except for the next question okay sophia says two out of three sophia says help i hate my job and i have the most annoying boss ever. I've only been at this job for about six months and it was presented much differently than how it is now. You got duped. I started my own business a couple months ago and I'm doing well, but not well enough to quit my job. What do I do? Do I find a new job that's part-time and focus on my business or do I suck it up and stay miserable? I'm worried I won't be able to match my current salary at any other position or job and then even be more miserable that I can't afford an occasional shopping spree or luxurious vacation. How do I

cope and when will the world just pay me for being the fabulous bitch i am i love how you did that she said betch betch um if you really hate your job you've got to get out right i disagree well i have to say doing if you're she's starting her own business if you're so miserable it's going to be very hard to be inspired to like do your own thing because you're going to come home from work and be so pissed off and just want to like go to bed and drink a bottle of wine but i mean if you don't think you can have find another job that pays you enough to stay afloat then that's also a problem but then you're just gonna have to cut out maybe your shopping screen luxurious vacation every once in a while all jobs suck even the good ones yeah i mean becca you were on a hit television

show yeah but she like hates her job like i never like woke up and was like i hate my job there were like elements and aspects that i hated right but i get what you're saying remember when my sister came on and was like don't be a baby yeah nobody yeah no and the it's always the grass is always greener and you're gonna think that something's gonna be better but yeah jobs suck that's why they're jobs what's fun is vacations and purses so make your money on your good salary keep your eyes open though keep playing the field network and if an opportunity comes that matches your salary or is like a glow up then you can move but for the time being like well also when it's like if you're starting your own business hopefully that'll start making you money at some point

and then you can take a part-time job and then also supplement your income from your own job or from your own business good idea all right our last question comes from anonymous she says i've never used a tampon before and although i tried to put one in i got confused and nothing wanted to go in with the monkey emoji covering his eyeballs. Does it make a difference to my being a real girl if I can't use tampons but only pads? Love you guys. I will start off by

saying that I told the story in the beginning of this podcast, but I got a tampon stuck inside me once when I was like 15 and had to get it taken out at the ER and it was really, really embarrassing. So I understand your pain, but I think that there's a lot of girls that can't use tampons.

Right? Yeah. I think there are, but maybe okay first maybe start with a mini also make sure you're using a tampon with a plastic applicator and you're not just shoving one of those that don't have an applicator or cardboard guy also like don't do it at the end of your period because things get dry do it like on your heaviest day yeah try that a small one i will say i have a tilted uterus so like my tampons go in and then i kind of have to jimmy them like yeah sideways to fit so maybe like just really explore up there and then also i'm just gonna say i do think a full menstrual pad is a little rough to wear

but i have discovered those things period panties that you can get the heavy flow in the black and they are actually not that bad so if you have to do a pad maybe and you don't want to feel like i have a question about the panties yeah what do you change something inside of the panties no you just wash them no you just wash them you bleed all day it's like a diaper i use i use mine when i go to bed with it but i have a tampon in so it's because i always leak because i believe yeah you have a crazy see i just sleep in them overnight yeah and then like you know in the morning after you've been laying down and then you stand up and you're like morning gush it like catches the morning gush um also something to try that i hated but a lot of people are obsessed with is the diva

cup so that might work a little bit better for you but i have to say that there's a huge learning curve with that and it's very uncomfortable when you first start using it but people love it they're obsessed with maybe ask your gyno too maybe there's something happening like you do have a tilted uterus like kelty or something yeah yeah you should make sure that everything's cool there you can probably lube it up too that's what i was thinking you're like put some coconut oil in it yeah and then you won't ever get yeast infections like a teeny tiny bit maybe yeah okay yeah because it might be dry roll the tape on that tampon congratulations on your tiny vagina yeah i know you're gonna make some men very happy one day yay okay um anyway on that note thanks for joining us

We have things to talk about before we let you go A B Becca Tell us about our live show The live show is happening December 16th at 1pm In Los Angeles

We're very excited Tickets are on sale if you go to theladygang.com At this moment There may or may not be VIP tickets available They're going to be sold out They're hotcakes But if they're not, we still want to see you It's going to be fun

We'll drink some sparkling wine It'll be really good time Yes it will And also the fancy as f*** lady box is on sale Now Greg has purchased one for Sarah We need all of you to put them on your holiday wish list Give it to your Gregs Or get the Gregs to give it to you

They've shipped out They've already shipped out some of them Some of them are shipped They're arriving in your pretty hands I will say the facial microdermabrasion scrub Is one of the greatest products ever used in my life I used it today And it's worth like $75

Do we have one I can use? Yeah. Girl. Thanks. Girl, you have a box. No, I don't. Anyway, it's so amazing. You must get your lady box.

They're shipping within the week that you order them. They are the perfect present to give your bosses, your best friends, your moms, whatever. Also, they will sell out. So it's not like this is going to go on forever. So I would get yours now because we don't know exactly when they're going to be gone. And they probably won't last until Christmas. They're so good for gifts, too, if you're stumped on what to get people in your life. Totally.

Don't get them a candle. Okay. Well unless there's a Jack Van Dyke one Okay Follow us on At the Lady Gang At Becca At Kelsey Knight

At Jack Van Dyke We love you so much Make sure you subscribe on iTunes And share this podcast with your friends So we can take over the world And quit our jobs Like what was her name? Anonymous

Sophia We want to get out Of our jobs Save me I hate my non-job I hate our non-job Okay And

See you next Tuesday Call T You've got to stop Sing it with me Jack just sing it with me No I can't See you next Tuesday. Thank you.

I'm embarrassed now. I'm sorry. Yay! Woo! Yay! All right! Join the Lady Gang every Tuesday at iTunes and at podcastone.com. That's podcastone.com.

Thanks for listening.