LadyGang - ASK THE LADYGANG

Episode Date: April 28, 2026

LadyGang is back and better than ever! Our signature segment Good Week Bad Week is here with the stories you didn't know you needed, including a backyard carcass, a painting session with mom, and everything in between. This week, the gang is diving into the messiest corners of your life: navigating roommate drama, spotting dating red flags before it's too late, surviving family chaos, and figuring out what happens when you become your friend's boss. No topic is off limits, no story is too wild, and no question goes unanswered. Pull up a seat, the gang's all here.We have spring deals for YOU!!OneSkin: Want to reduce signs of aging? Try OneSkin with 15% off using code Lady at OneSkin.co/lady - AND TELL THEM THAT LADYGANG SENT YOU!Boll & Branch: Upgrade your sleep! Get 15% off your first order plus free shipping at BollAndBranch.com/ladygang with code ladygangNutrafol: Got thinning hair? Get $10 off your first month’s subscription AND free shipping at Nutrafol.com and use code LGPODDirecTV: Get over 60 channels, Disney+, Hulu, and HBO Max ALL IN ONE PACK for $34.99 a month at DirecTV.com/genrepacksSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Well, what is this? Welcome to the Lady Gang. That's amazing. Say that again. The Lady Gang. Things are about to change around here. Each week, we catch up with Hollywood's hottest girl posse, Kelty Knight, Becca Tobin, and Jack Vanek. Hello, hello, hello. Welcome to Lady Gang. I am Becca Tobin, here with Jack Vanek and Kelty Knight.

Hello there. You know what? I never got the Lady Gang Red Rose merch t-shirt. I only got the sports mom things. Uh-oh. No, it didn't. Or Lazy Gang? I think it's almost sold out. This is one of my favorite t-shirts I've ever had in my life. Like whether it was Lady Gang merch or not, I wear it almost every day.

It's the perfect t-shirt. It's like the black, but it's like a little vintage. It's so good. What size did you get? I'm going to order one. I got a medium. God, I hope it's not sold out. Well, I do for our sake, but I also really want it.

I think it's a medium. Yes. Okay. It's so good. I can tell you how many there are right now. Okay. Thank you. Thank you.

I'll go. I'll just be really quick. So it's time for Good Week. Yes, it is. Bad Week. Oh, no. Isn't it so fun when you're listening to a podcast and they're just like rushing through it? Just like, I'll be really quick. And everyone's like, why? Why? I'm here to listen. It's like your show. You don't have to be quick. I'm so sorry. Let me just say one thing. That's literally how I feel all the time when I talk. I'm like, let me just rush through this because I know nobody cares. There are eight Lady Gang for Lovers t-shirts left. Period? That's it.

Not even just in what sizes? No, there's actually one of every size left. Oh, yes. Wait, let me see. Yep. Go get them, girls. Okay. Get them, girls.

All right. So my bad week actually has to do with attire. I was invited to this. Natalie Crawford was a doctor that we had on for. She's amazing. She's incredible. She lives in Austin. I've just been sort of following on Instagram, sending people to her just because I've heard such good things. I had never met her in person. We did the podcast.

And then she had a book launch in Austin that a friend of mine threw. And I got the invite a couple weeks ago. And nowadays, don't you feel like the invites that are digital, you get like weird text messages from weird numbers confirming things, then you get the email. I don't like it at all. It's just confusing. So I've stopped really looking back. Like when I know something's coming, I put it in the calendar and then I don't look at the invitation again. Right. Well, I, it's a Sunday night. I'm getting ready to go to this event. I'm, you know, I get dressed and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I walk up to the front door and I see a bunch of women in beautiful cocktail dresses. I am wearing jeans. I am wearing the most distressed Zara jeans you've ever seen

in your life like we're not even wearing distressed denim anymore are we like are you hailey bieber 2012 i had i was rushing to get ready distressed jeans it's a sunday in my defense like it's a sunday and then a and a button down that had not been not been ironed like an oversized button down that it was horrible and then her bare minimum becca i did and i didn't even mean to but I just, I was horrified. The photographer was walking around the party. They were taking pictures. And she was probably like,

you were probably the biggest celeb there for her. No, I don't think so. I don't even think he's a celeb. Well, I mean, a little bit. They're like, who came to the party? And you're like, Becca Tobin, you are someone. I'm sorry. She's in jeans.

I know, but you can make jeans look very elevated. You do make jeans look cute. It's not like me wearing jeans. You always look very elevated. That's not cocktail attire. No, it's not. Textures? How dare I? Did you have a boot on?

I had a pointy-toed heel. Oh, that's good. Or like a, yeah, a heel. At least it wasn't like a Birkenstock. No, I would never. Okay, so that's my lesson for not reading the invitation. Just one more scan, just one more look over before you leave. Skim.com.

I skimmed. I skimmed. Okay, and then my good week is really simple. This morning, 7.30 in the morning, Ford was sleeping in, and I cleaned out of my refrigerator. Oh, that's so nice. I found mold I found mold I pulled out the bottom drawer and it was like fuzzy in the corner the back corner so anyways it is so gorgeous I open it a couple times a day now and it is just stunning so I recommend spring cleaning go clean your fridges who's next I went to go open my like get

a Tupperware out the other day and there was a moth the size of my hand just dead and it looked like it had been petrified wood. Like I was like, oh, this moth has been this dead for this long. And like, I haven't been in this drawer and you know what? I'm sick of being an adult. Something is always happening. Cleaning. Anyway. Okay. Jack, you go. Okay. So my, um, my good week is that obviously if anybody follows me on Instagram, you know, that my mom has also been diving into her painting journey alongside me. She actually started hers before me. She took up a painting class last year. And she's kind of inspired me to get back into painting last year. So it's just been so fun to do this like alongside her. But anyways, my good week is I made her an Instagram

so she can share her own art. And I want everybody to go follow her. It's May Vanik Art. And because she just like paints the most incredible shit. And then she just like throws it aside. And it's like, Oh, this is like, whatever. I'm like, you need to post this. You need to share it with the world. Your art deserves to be shared with the world and seen by the world. And I just want everybody to go give her some props because she's so good. I love that you're living in a little witchy artist commune now. I know. It's so cute. You're my favorite. I'm like, what the hell did I do with my time before I started painting again? Because now she just comes over and we paint together for hours. And it's just so cute. And it was cute. I'm having her paint one thing

for me every mail club because I'm like, it's a good way to share her art and stuff. And she painted the sticker for April's. Is it the little boot? The little boot with the flowers in it. It's so good. So cute. I know. I'm like, I couldn't do this. She's like so much better at me with like realistic stuff than I am. But anyways, I posted about it and I had so many people asking about prints. So I'm going to make prints of it to sell for her. You know, that would be cute in my baby's room in austin i'll send you one wait can we do a merch shirt of like of what a jack like art yeah yeah it just depends i mean the printing and stuff it's hard yes yeah the color the colors okay um my bad week i don't know if it's a bad week or good week but i have a new doppelganger

allegedly i have had many people message me on instagram saying that they're watching alex Cooper's show, The Unwell Games, and they're like, I swear that I saw you on it, and it's Anna Delvey. So, you tell me, people. I'm, like, looking her up again. She does look really good. She's definitely got some good work done, which is funny because I feel like old school her looked like old school me a little bit.

Like, we had the same, like, very round face. Oh, yeah. I mean, you're way prettier than Anna Delvey, but okay. She's actually pretty right now. good like her dancing with the stars banging yeah she's like okay you guys have the same like eyes like set eye like the same beady eyes no i was gonna say like wides wider set but not wide in a creepy way same hair color like i can if you looked at it like yeah okay no i see it i see it like fast but maybe but i mean i was like she just looks so grumpy all the time and you don't

look grumpy ever. No, it's definitely her personality is a little bit different from mine, but I guess thank you. Thank you. Speaking of eyeballs, I'll go into my bad week. I am so excited because my parents are here and they're hanging out with me and we're, you know, summer in LA, we're in the backyard and I turn, so that's my good week. My bad week is I turned to the left and Callie is busy in the yard doing something. And I was like, huh, what is, what's she getting into over there I walk over now as I have said in other episodes the voles are very busy in my area which is like a gerbil slash rat that lives in the hills of California and it has giant teeth and I look over and Callie is eating the eyeball out of a vole head just the head the head is by

itself and you can see its backbone is snapped and the backbone is like hanging out like you know when you get a ribeye at the steak place and like there's a bone hanging out it's like that and I was like, oh my God, Callie, stop eating this. So then I have to get the pooper scooper and I scooped the head. And what was crazy is that I was like, how the did the vole head get in my yard? And we really rip it off the body. Well, I was like, did she rip it? No, I don't think so. Then I'm like, did a coyote come in and eat half and then leave the head? No. Guess what it was? A hawk. I did some research. Hawks collect the voles and then they have them in their mouth and they're still alive. And then they slap their necks. And then sometimes the head can fall

because they keep the body because that's where the meat is. So the whole head, isn't that disgusting? Well, see, this is where I really don't understand that people let their dogs look their faces. Yeah, it's risky. Well, I did. I was like, oh, I don't know if you're going to. And now she's licking my face again. But it is wild. She was eating that and it was bloody. It was fresh eyeball out. Diseased. Good for you, Callie. She is so crazy.

Anyway, when we come back, these crazy bitches are going to fix your life. Mornings without coffee. Road trips without snacks. Movies without popcorn. Without our favorite foods, we'd miss out on

all our favorite moments. Learn more at canadasfoodsystem.ca Now back to the Lady Gang. Okay, if you're new to this podcast, which you're not, if you've been listening forever, when we first started the show, we had a segment called Ask the Lady Gang where we really helped people's lives. And we had every week people sent in their emails and we answer them. And over time, we got rid of this segment because we felt like you should not take our

advice. That's an understatement. And, you know, we just lost it. And then we asked you guys a few weeks ago, like, what do you want? And so many people said, please bring back Ask the Lady Gang. So we sent out an email, we got a ton of questions, and we're going to fix some lives today. And honestly, I feel ready for this. Okay, so the first one is anonymous from Northern California. She says, I need to know if I'll ever get my friend back once we crossed over to the roommate zone. We are great roommates, but I miss a few things that were constant for us when we're just friends. Side note, I'm happy living here. Just lots of uncertainty of when she's going to ask me to leave or move. That's so rough. I feel like it's so, so risky moving in with a

friend because it usually goes south because then you're like, it's almost like dating them. Now you're in a relationship. You're seeing them in their little quiet moments. You're starting to notice little things that they do that bug the shit out of you. Like if they leave like the lint in the dryer and then it starts like building resentment and resentment um i think you should move out as soon as possible if you want to stay friends there's just with the way that she is writing this too there's a power dynamic that's going on she's like i'm wondering when she's going to ask me when i have to leave so the friend obviously has the power maybe she moved into her apartment or something and now she's just like she's probably walking on eggshells she's probably

not trying to like show her true self to the friend. And that's just hard. You don't want to be in a power dynamic with a friend. Like you should be equal with your friends. Well, I would also just have a very open conversation. Just really communicate that you have anxiety about her deciding she doesn't want you there anymore and just have like a really honest conversation. I also think it's a good thing to say, hey, we're adults. We don't have to have passive aggressive things between each other. If there's something I'm doing that you would like for me to change or adjust or fix, like if it's something that I am, that's easy for me to do, I want to do it because I want us to have like a really comfortable living space. Open conversation

is just the only answer here or, or Jack move out. But I think open conversation is probably better. Yeah. It's definitely communication. It's so hard though. Especially if they haven't had it. yeah I mean I lost one of my best friends after we were uh roommates so really see I've lived with a bunch of my friends before and it's always been fine yeah it can be hard um okay Madison from Nashville my boyfriend and I have been this is crazy my boyfriend and I have been together for three years and he still hasn't introduced me to his family every time I bring it up he says soon and changes the subject my friends think I should give an ultimatum but that feels so scary and also kind of embarrassing that I even have to ask,

is this a red flag? Am I being impatient? I genuinely cannot tell if I'm the problem. I mean, you're definitely not the problem. That is a huge, massive red flag. I wonder if he has another girlfriend. Or if he's just somebody that's like, doesn't want to commit that hard, you know?

And he thinks that if he does introduce her, it means it's sending the wrong message. But if they've been dating for three years, in the same city does his family live in the same city as him family lives in the same city as you and you've been together three years and you've yet to meet his family pop smoke and get the out that's weird I also think it's a not red flag but like an interesting point that he changes the subject I mean he might have a bad relationship with his family we need more context to this story if he has a bad relationship and he just doesn't want to like that's what I'm saying

the fold then that's one thing but like if she doesn't seem to know why then it doesn't seem like it's a bad relationship more so he's just avoiding it to avoid it for i don't know maybe a different reason but also what if he's like a grifter and i always go to the worst place but like here's i mean because men are usually the worst place yes what if you recreated your life and you're like you know he's got his life together and everything and his family is like junk you know what I mean? And he doesn't want to show that to her. Like my hope is that that's what it is rather than he doesn't want to commit. But either way, it's a major, major red flag because you're not at the same place. If you are like thinking next step is engagement party and you haven't

met the family at any of the Christmases or Halloween parties or family events like you're. Well, and I think it's just like a communication thing. Like you need to ask why you don't need to just be like, oh, he's changing the subject. It's like you need to dive into what is the reason why because there are some acceptable answers and then there are some that aren't and we know from having the sex expert on that you should come and then ask him come get him relaxed get him in a good place and then ask him that's what she said on the podcast she said if you they want to feel closeness so he wants to connect with you he's gonna you're gonna sleep with him and then well hopefully you're sleeping together after three years i just like can't imagine doing that like

that's the time when you bring up a hard conversation i just can't imagine doing that myself well I can't either because within like 20 seconds I'm we're in the shower honey we're already at the we're at Trader Joe's three minutes after shit I'm like okay got it maybe he's embarrassed about his family like maybe you know but then she just needs to know I know she just needs to ask and she needs to say but then it's like this is I think about the same thing for both of these questions like the timing it's like sometimes it's too far gone like sometimes it's been so much time and now it's like past the awkward stage of even bringing it up that it's like, now it's like, it feels almost untouchable conversation. Okay. Dani, long time listener.

She said a long time listener and lurker from Phoenix. I got a promotion at work, which is amazing, but now I'm managing two of my closest work friends and it is so awkward. One of them already made a comment at happy hour about how i've changed i haven't changed i just actually have to do my job now i don't want to lose the friendship but i also worked really hard for this how do i not become the villain in this story oh well to me it seems like if you really haven't changed and you're just being professional it seems like maybe your friends are jealous of Of course they're jealous. Of your promotion and they're jealous of,

and so I don't think those are even people you need as friends. If they're not going to support you, I mean, listen, a little jealousy is normal, but if they're going to be dicks about it, like grow up. Just say what you feel. You're, you know, it's a hard dynamic to change, but it's not something that you can't get over

as long as they are reasonable and just say, sorry, it's just weird, this new dynamic. and, you know, I'll be more supportive of what you're doing. Or you could say to them, like, I just, I'm feeling, you said this comment, I'm feeling weird. I'm trying to do my best to not make this strange or weird or be bossy or whatever. But if there's something I'm doing, tell me.

Otherwise, I just really want to feel a little bit more supported. Like, I didn't give myself this promotion. I mean, she should ask, she should be direct and be like, tell me why I've changed. Give me an example. Yeah, that's a good idea. Other than just being, I mean, again, it's the same thing with living with a friend, working with, working underneath, working with friends where there's a power dynamic, again, is very hard. Like it's hard that you're now the boss of somebody and you can like tell them what to do when you should be equals as friends. But I think it's just being direct and be like, give me an example. And if the example is just like I'm doing my job, then that's hard. I think you could also say to them, hey, this is like super awkward for me because like I need to get shit done, but I also don't want to make you feel like I'm stepping over you. What's the best way? Like, and that's something that's worked even with Lady Gang. Like when I smash you guys over, I'm like, hey, what's Jack? What's the best way to send you a to do list? Like, how do you prefer for me to follow up and be annoying and be like bossing you around? And you're like, I prefer a text. Great. Well, I'm not going to send you a million emails.

I'm just going to say, and you know, like, I think that maybe making that clear and then, and then they'll know that they, and they also need to not be doing the little side digs at you. Go f*** yourself, you know? Yeah. I hate that. Yeah. You're listening to The Lady Gang. Okay. Grace, sending love from rainy Seattle. I matched with someone on a dating app and we've been texting for three weeks and he's not asked to meet up. The conversation is great. Seems really interested. I feel like I'm in a situation ship with someone I've never met. Do I bring it up? Do I just unmatch and protect my heart? I'm already attached and this is embarrassing to admit. As somebody who has done this so many times

in my past, it is so bad. Like I matched with so many guys on Tinder and we would be texting for weeks. I'd be like thinking about how we'd look like at our wedding. Like the vibes are always so good you have so much good banter but it's like you don't know this person at all and a lot of times if it's just through text that doesn't translate when you're in front of somebody in real life and then you have this idea in your head of what they should be and it always even either falls short or if you're like me and you already like start planning your future with them you get so disappointed if like it's like you're almost like love bombing yourself in the sense and then if it's not like if he doesn't ask you to be his girlfriend on the

first date like you expected then it's always a disappointment so like if i had any advice of anybody on dating apps it's meet up as soon as possible if you think that there is a vibe meet up as soon as possible and cut it off as soon as like you're not feeling it because i wasted so much time thinking i was in love with duds so duds so many duds we should we should definitely be using the word duds more yeah it's a dud my advice this shirt is a dud jack's a dud jack tries to count to talk and kelty can't talk dud no my advice to her is just um tell him to shit or get off the pot and go meet up and see if you're vibing in person but then don't bring all these preconceived feelings with you to that date like have zero expectations and then kind of

go from there. But that's hard because I have been in those situations. Yeah. It's just weird because we're so used to these like parasocial relationships now. Yeah. I know my brother was been dating and he was talking to someone for like a really long time. And then all of a sudden she was just gone. And you're just like, were you real? This is so fucked up. And like, I agree. Like online? Yeah. They never met up? Yeah. They never met up. But like they were talking all the time. And I was like, these are perfect. And I don't know, we get away with like doing these pretend versions of ourselves online that like, you know, yeah, I agree. Okay. This is really Courtney said, I'm from a small town in Ohio where everyone knows everyone's business.

My mom and my best friend have become closer than my mom and I are. Honestly, it hurts. They text each other. They make plans. And during a crisis last week, my friend called my mom instead of me. I know I should be grateful that they love each other, but instead I feel weirdly replaced or totally crazy. I'm going to tell you something that's happened to me and I was pissed. No. Yeah. Sheila. Sheila. I yelled at her. With who? I had a big fight with my mom a couple months about this. Not a fight. I just had to yell at her. So a few months ago, right after Lady World, actually. So everyone knows that when I brought, I brought my family, whole family to Lady World and I brought my brother to Lady World and he's not a big traveler

And he, when he got home from the stress, I guess, from the stress of traveling and being out of the country, he ended up getting Bell's palsy. And my family did not tell me about it because I was, it was a bad time for me and they knew I was stressed and e-news had just been canceled. They're like, we don't want to add more to your plate. And so they didn't tell me, but my friend Emily had had Bell's palsy. So my mom was waiting to take my brother to the ER for all these days, which I would have like flipped out if I had known that they had waited three days. Because if you don't get like the Sarah, the stuff within 48 hours, you up your face forever. But she had texted my friend Emily to be like, Matt has Bell's palsy. What do we do? Go, go, go.

Emily thought that I had already known. and my mom was like oh i didn't want to bother you and i knew emily was like an expert and person to go to and i when emily was like oh i talked to your mom about matt's bell's palsy i was like i'm sorry what like no i was so mad and when i yelled didn't yell but when i had a hard conversation with my mom about it she was like i just you were busy and i didn't want to bother you. And this is something and like, I mean, I talk about this a lot, but like I trained my family to not bother me in my 20s because I was so busy living my big life that I was like, don't bother me with your life. And now in my 30s, 40s, I've become a better human where I'm like, please

bother me. And I almost had to like retrain them. And I said to Emily, I said, thank you for telling me. And then I went to my mom. And so this is my advice. Go to your mom and be like, I love your mom and your friend and be like, I love that you guys are close. We're like a little trio. This is amazing, but you have to keep me in the loop. Like, especially during a crisis, like it hurts my feelings that I wasn't the first call. Um, and I'm always here for you. And no matter how busy, like blame it on yourself a little, no matter how busy you think I am, no matter how flighty or how long it takes me to return, just like send the 911 emoji and like, call me. And I w I want to be your first person. I'm glad you're so close with your mom, my mom. And she is amazing, but

you know yeah yeah keep it in a group chat or something yeah so weird that's rough i mean there's no way that you can't that doesn't hurt your feelings if you're the daughter like sure that's that's yeah there's nothing worse than being like out of the loop in friendship and like the all of these questions it's the same thing is like i'm not in control i'm out of the loop like yeah and the the answer is always going to be being direct and the hardest thing is always going to be being direct. It's so uncomfortable to have direct conversations with people. And because of all the social media we have and the passive aggressiveness and the emails and the text messages and the emojis, like what does that emoji mean? We've gotten so good at never

just getting to the point, picking up the phone or seeing them in person and just being like, hey, this is my boundary. This is what I need from you. I love you. This is coming from a place of love this hurts me how do you want to be spoken to like we just have to teach each other god it's like it's hard and it's also we go around fix sorry my last rant we go around fixing people who refuse to go to therapy in my opinion that's true like we have to go I have to double up in therapy because not only am I working on my own shit I'm planning conversations that I need to have with people that are f***ing up my life because they won't go to therapy. Like I have to fix me and then I have to fix their shit and teach them how to therapize themselves. It's all

on me. You're welcome, everyone. Anyway, if you thought that our advice was good, write more. Ask the Lady Gang questions at helloladygang at gmail.com and we will answer them in the next question. Thank you to all the girly pops. And I think we did good, guys. We're back. We're back, baby. We're giving much more mature advice these days than we used to. are. I know. Remember our old advice was, we should like burn it down. We're like, get drunk and f*** him. Yeah. Fish him. Okay. We'll be more shady next time. Anyway, we love you and we will see you next Tuesday. Lady Gang is hosted and produced by Kelty Knight, Becca Tobin, and Jack Vanek with social media support from Kali Carrera, audio and video editing from Jared

Monaco, and additional support from Steve Delameter and Podcast One. Thanks for watching!