LadyGang - Austin LadyHang Recap

Episode Date: November 9, 2021

After having their first live show in two years, the ladies are recapping the total chaos of an event. Filled with too many Cha-quila’s, the casual v slips, and toilet paper dresses, one thing’s clear, The LadyGang was there for a good time, not a long time and it was GOOD to be back. Check out our amazing sponsors!!! Wordtune: Get 50% off Wordtune for teams at wordtune.com/lady  Capri Blue: Get 20% off your entire purchase at capri-blue.com/lg20  ZenBusiness: Get started today for as low as $49 at zenbusiness.com/lady  obé Fitness: Use code LADYGANG to get a WHOLE MONTH FREE at obefitness.com  BetterHelp: Get 10% off your first month of online therapy at BetterHelp.com/ladygang  Rareform: Go to rareform.com/lady to save 25% off sitewide now through November 15th! Seed Probiotics: Visit seed.com/lady and use code LADY to redeem 20% off your first month of Seed’s Daily Synbiotic! Travis Mathew: Find pure performance without sacrificing style in the Heater Active collection! Visit TravisMathew.com/podcast and use the code "LADY20" to get 20% off your first purchase.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Stop wasting your nights on a mattress that doesn't get you. Experience the most comfortable mattress in the world. The Sleep Number Smart Bed. At the touch of a button, you can personalize your comfort. Choose firmer or softer. Adjust cooler to warmer. And right now, save up to $2,500 during our massive Labor Day event. Hurry into your local Sleep Number store today.

Because we have your number. Today's episode of Lady Gang is brought to you by Capri Blue. Get 20% off your entire purchase at capri-blue.com slash LG20. That's capri-blue.com slash LG20. Close to our heart is the belief that ladies give back and show up for others. Right now, there are over 300 million women and girls that live in period poverty across the world. And without period care, they often stop going to school and miss out on economic opportunities. So we're showing up for them. We've partnered with salt sustainable period care ab corp with a two percent give back mission to donate period care and help fund initiatives in menstrual health so each time you buy with lady gang at

shop.theladygang.com you're helping give girls in need planet saving period care so when their periods start their education doesn't have to stop plus go to salt.com pages lady gang for your own period care and get 15 off with code lady gang well what is this welcome to the lady gang that's amazing say that again the lady gang things are about to change around here each week we catch up with hollywood's hottest girl posse kelty knight becca tobin and jack vanik hello hello hello welcome to the lady gang i am becca tobin here with jack vanik and kelty night and we are oh wait by the way that is not on fast word that was just how fast becca did it sound like it was on 2x yes and we're the chipmunks merry christmas oh my god you're

welcome um we i have not recovered no kelty's on a day to hang over i want to cry my i honestly can barely speak because my vocal cords are so dry and it doesn't matter i've done lozenges i've done water. I have coffee. I have hot tea. I did CBD. Like it doesn't matter the insides of me. I'm so hung over that the insides are dry. Yeah. They just, they start shriveling up and dying. Welcome to my life. It's crazy. I'm like the bright light is like, oh my God. Anyway, how are you guys? Kelty's wearing sunglasses. It's 8am and it's gloomy outside. Just for anybody wondering what whole vibe is i'm wearing this swacket i'm wearing i slept in my austin extra large sleep shirt yesterday wow oh you got one i never got one i know i found one in the box left over and i was

it was extra large and i was like this is amazing i'm wearing this swacket i lit a candle for the people who don't know we just had a live show in austin yes oh yeah good point we should have prepped that probably the first one that in what two years first show in two years and boy we're we rusty oh my god we actually i think came out of the gate swinging we were really on it on it we're gonna talk about it let's do let's keep in line here okay all right well it's time for good week yes it is bad week oh no um i'll kick it off i can't stop watching tiktok and I'm in, I'm in, and I have been watching like hot police officers and like hot firemen. Have you seen these people? No, but you know what? It's so funny. This is what I think is

so funny for anybody that like newly goes on Tik TOK. They're like, Oh my God, why is my, my, the whole feed, all of Tik TOK is just hot police officers. And what it really is, is you watch one hot police officer video and then your algorithm just started populating hot police officer videos and then that's all you see it's pretty it's pretty incredible it's probably because i liked all of them yeah oh yeah oh yeah they're like this is what this bitch wants let's get for more she's a horny housewife wait is it the one where the guy like he's like in normal clothes and then he like kicks his foot and then he like gets dressed in his hot uniform yes exactly exactly why do we never see these men on the streets no offense to police officers

everywhere. Like I, they're obviously on social media, but like when you walk past the precinct in New York, that's not who's hanging out. No, no, no, no, no, no. When I was in New York last time, last time I was walking down the street and I passed a fire station and I'm not kidding. Every single man looks like a model. Like it was, I'm like, are you guys filming something? They were all hot. They were all like 25 years old. I watched past like three times. I was like, this is where they were slitting this dress a little bit bigger. oh my god they were so hot but they're somewhere i do think new york city has the hottest men of service because it's just like a hot city like just per capita you know like hotter people are

in new york yeah they're like beefy men from staten island yeah and they're like they just been growing up eating mom's italian you know they're like real beefy they're losing their hair but it doesn't matter you in these glasses the sunglasses doing your tony soprano impression is making my morning yeah you're you're on a different level what's your bad week becca oh okay my bad week is um you guys have heard this before but i wanted people really like kelty isms on this podcast yeah and it's just peeling back the layers of the artichoke or the onion if you will with kelty with all these little stories so i was on a trip for capital one i did this epic trip to santa fe it was amazing and a lot of the girls that were there were lady gang listeners

And they were asking me like, how is it? Are the girls exactly the same? Like they are on the podcast. And I'm like, yes. And they're like, is Kelty really like that? And I go, yeah, here's a great example. We just got the sweetest text message from Tanya Rad, a group message to the three of us. And Tanya was like, I had a dream last night that I was at a party and every girl there was so... I knew I was going to get shit for this. Yes. Every girl there was so mean to me. in my dream. All I needed was some lip gloss and the lady gang showed up and they brought me lip gloss. And I just want you guys to know that that's so symbolic of how I feel like the sweetest, the sweetest message ever. And me and Jack respond like, we love you.

We'll always give you our lip gloss, blah, blah, blah. Right back at you. Kelty, thumbs up to the text. Thumbs up. That's it. No response. Nothing else. I knew I was going to get shit for this. Well, you guys said everything. Do we each have to comment? I should say like a nice, something a little nice commented enough. Like I was just gonna say,

yeah, more of what they said. Obviously you can have my lip gloss. I think honestly, like a non-response would have been better than the thumbs up. Like if you, if you just let us to do the response. Hold on, this happened on Housewives.

The thumbs up is the cue, but I meant it as like, yeah, you can have my lip gloss. You could have loved it. a heart is way better than a thumbs up. Well, Jesus Christ, give me a break. I mean, I will write Tanya today and let her know that she can have my lip gloss. The best part is this was like at least a month ago. So I can't wait for this month later response. That's how I feel. You know what? I just got up early to do my Bujo because I was so hung over last night on Sunday

night that I couldn't do a full Bujo. So I got up early to get my mind clear for this week. I'm going to add on to my KK section, which is my personal things. Write Tanya re lip gloss. You know what? I'm actually going to send her a fucking lip gloss in the mail. Oh, shit. See, that would make up for the lack of response. Sorry I gave you a thumbs up on Instagram. The girls trolled me. Here's a real lip gloss. I like it. That's a great response. I actually love it. See, and you redeem yourself once again, every time, every time because it's not on purpose. I do feel like if you guys are watching Salt Lake housewives, like Lisa Barlow gets a lot of shit. And I actually think Lisa Barlow is me where she's never trying to be an asshole on

purpose. She's just an asshole, you know, like Larry David. Yeah. She's not trying. She's not trying to be like, I didn't think about your feelings. She just doesn't think about anyone else's feelings. Like that's different. It's not on purpose. It's not, I'm ignoring you because I'm a bitch. It's I'm ignoring you because I thought we were good and we weren't obviously. Yeah, no, that's exactly what it is. You're not a malicious person. You're just very aloof. I'm just not even on the planet. Can I go next? Because mine's so good. Yeah. Okay. Yes, please. I'm just Instagramming what you look like right now. Okay. So I flew home from Austin. So I flew from Austin last night and the flight was absolutely packed.

It was, the Austin airport's pretty small and it was crazy. I mean, it was, and I was on coach because I'm back to being a normie in the exit row. Anyway, so I'm, I'm so tired. I'm in the swack it. I look like hell. I'm just like leaning against the wall and just like, I can't wait to get home. Anyway, so about 45 minutes into the flight, they haven't

even started the drinks yet. That's where we're at. An announcement comes over. The lights go up. And of course, as I'm wearing sunglasses, like, light was not good for me. Lights go up and I was like... You wore your sunglasses on a night flight? No, no, no. I didn't have my sunglasses. That's why I'm wearing them today

because my retina is burnt when delta was on a night flight and they say turn the lights off and then over the intercom we hear hello has anyone lost a cat no no and i'm like i'm like i'm awake i'm alert i'm here for whatever's happening now on this plane where's the cat a cat and then i see the flight attendant from the front of the plane, walking down the aisle, holding the cutest, big, giant, grumpy cat. And you know, cats, when they get held and they don't want to be held, they're like, meow, meow. And they're kind of freaking out. This cat was like, you bitch. I was found like, it was so mad that it got caught. So what was funny is that, you know, everyone on the airplane has their like noise

canceling headphones. So no one's paying attention when the lights go up and someone makes announcement you think okay unless we're like moving around like this and we're going down I'm just gonna keep watching my movie right yeah keep going and she's walking down the aisle and this guy like pulls his headphones on and jumps up he's like that's my cat he didn't even hear the announcement the cat was allegedly in a bag the cat got out and was found eight rows ahead of where the cat like I'm just thinking about the cats that I know and normally when cats are scared or something's going on, they kind of like do that hunch and they sit for a while and just kind of lives. This cat was on a full, full exploration. And then the guy in front of that guy was like,

I felt something rub my foot. I thought I was just like hallucinating. Oh my God. Ew. I would have went on a journey. So then the greatest part was like, she hands the cat back to him. And then she's like, can you zip back? I know. I'm like, doesn't like, you can't just put your cat in your purse. Like you need to put it in a zip bag. I think it got out. Cats are smart, Jack, they have all those, they have an extra thumb, six fingers, six finger shuffle. Just zip. Wow. Sick. Anyways. Great. Okay. Sick. Um, a quick bad week. So while we were at Austin, I used a photo for my Instagram. That's still up. Um, where I had an outside snail trail on my onesie and picture with my friends and I did it in three parts. So I had the faraway picture a little bit

closer and then a super big zoom up on the snail trail. I had the show on the projection. Yes. Thank you, Becca. Because I, I didn't think this through because normally we just do it, but like, there's no visual aid, but we had a visual aid. And then Alex was like, there's a big screen. You can put your photos for your good week, bad week up on the screen. I was like, that's a great idea. Here's the photo. And then I got on Instagram after the show and there are so many photos that people took with me standing in front of my 30 foot snail trail on the stage in Austin. And I'm like, I'm trying to get another job in my life on television. I hope to God, this doesn't haunt me forever. And I should wear underwear. Good night.

You should wear underwear. I think that that's the moral of the story. And I don't know how many times that something like this is going to happen that you don't learn your lesson. You too. You too. And your undergarments are something to behold. So I always wear underwear. Yeah. You're always, I never go commando. No, but you're always in a nude underwear. So every single time we take pictures and you're in a slit dress, a high slit, a little nine, nine times out of 10, it's like a Barbie. You're like a Barbie doll. So it's like, I know, I know I made an error. I should have worn black underwear. I don't know why I wore a nude. It was, it was a bad, it was a bad choice if you're going to completely redesign our clothing to be a uh beach cover-up

i'm gonna need you to put on a bathing suit a velvet beach cover-up i know i didn't i i made an error and then we're already there and i'm like i can't go back and change now so it's fine for the best but i apologies if anybody saw my or it wasn't my vagina but you might have thought it was well what's beautiful about you is that you do have a barbie vagina and i'm not like perving on you, but I've seen it enough now in photos to know that like with me, you get the inner vagina and then always the outer vagina. But with you, you are a Barbie. There's no extra flappy whip. It's just there. So if you are going to have to have your vagina out, this is the vagina of the group that we want out. I mean, Becca, I haven't seen yours at all. Probably like in one of those

like belts that you have to like get a lock and key in the main fortress. I've never seen your vagina at all, but from Jack and me, if you're going to have one in a photo, Jack's is preferred. Thank you. I guess. Okay. I'm going to go. Obviously I'm the last one. Great. It's your turn. My turn. My good week is a good week by proxy from Jared at the show. So Jared and my parent, my parents and Jared were both at the show in Austin. Shocker. They wouldn't miss it for the world. So they go to get drinks before the show and then they come, you know, while doors open and everybody else is kind of shuffling through, um, the venue. And there was like a bar in the front where everybody was getting drinks. They were mingling. Jared said that he

has never felt more famous in his entire life than he did at our show way more than any of his shows ever. He was getting bombarded by people. People were buying him shots, drinks. My parents were also famous people are taking pictures with my parents like it was honestly maybe more than like people wanted to take pictures with me like it was a next level thing don't you remember we were doing the vip meet and greet after like we would do them after the shows sometimes in the beginning and oh my god that girl came through the line what'd you say what'd you say that was bad i was too drunk to do that we gotta do yeah that was terrible yeah um so so we were going through the line and a girl had on a t-shirt and I saw Zach's signature across her boot. And I was like, wait,

is that, is that my husband's signature? She's like, yeah, I saw him in the lobby and I made him sign my t-shirt. Zach will never forget that moment. He was like, I have never been asked for an autograph. I'm a nobody. And he asked her, he goes like, do I sign it? Like I sign a check. Like he actually had to ask how to like sign an autograph. So yeah, it's like, what's my celebrity signature is that the same as my normie signature the men get bombarded bombarded at these shows you know i know you're halfway through your story but can i just jump in with a note my story really quick well let me finish my story okay and then you and then you becca told her story well no the last part of my story is okay when jared and my parents like walked down to take

their seats the entire crowd started a jerry chant the entire crowd as they should 150 people we're going, Jerry, Jerry, Jerry, while he got to a C. If anyone deserves that kind of hype, it is so nice. He's a special, special guy. He really is the greatest. Well, Chris was not at the show. Um, thank God. I know. I mean, we're going to talk about this, but anyway, but in the famous husband's boyfriends, Oh wait, husband's fiance's. I don't have boyfriends anymore. No more. I got an Instagram post that Jenny Mullen was at some Mercedes thing in New York city and she was posting videos from it. And someone took the photos, reposted them and was like, Kelty, is this Chris Knight? Someone that person who posted it was not in New York city

was not at the Mercedes event. She just was watching Jenny Mullen's Instagram saw Chris in Jenny's Instagram. Oh, I see what you're saying. It wasn't like they were like hanging out like Chris and Jenny together. It was like the back of Chris's head, but he's so fucking tall that she's like, I'm pretty sure this is Chris on Jenny's Instagram.

And I was like, are you there? Oh my God, say hi. She's like, no, no, I just saw it on Instagram. Anyway. Well, see, this is why none of our partners could ever cheat because we have eyes everywhere. Oh yeah, bitch. They're going to see it everywhere.

And then I was like, Chris, people are taking your photo. You need to fucking stand up straight. he's literally like you know how he's like at work and he's just like like little golem on his phone well i was like people watching is very long like it's that's hard to keep a little bit no it's hard i think this is probably i mean jack did you have a bad week uh i'll do a fast bad week i was on the plane and um i went i went to go to the bathroom before the cart the drink car i thought you're literally gonna have the same bad week as me

I went to go to the bathroom before the drink cart started going by. And I'm like, I'll go fast. I'll get back to my seat before it like passes me. Well, it passed me. And then the lady was like, oh, what seat are you in? And I'm like, oh, I'm in the exit row, whatever. I'm like, I can wait in the back. She's like, no, it's okay. We'll push it up. So they push the drink cart up a few rows for me to get in my seat. And then I go to sit down and I'm like, oh, by the way, is it okay if I get a ginger ale? The flight attendant screams at me. He goes, you missed it when we came through so no you can't get a drink and then they shut up kept going and i was like oh my god no on ouch on delta yes oh no delta and then the other lady finally who orders a ginger ale

i always order your own from the hudson news it's true do you have the flu yeah i don't i don't know it makes me feel better on a plane i'm sure i'm not the only one it's the only ginger ale yes it I guess that's the way I am with Bloody Mary mix. I only drink it on a plane. Yeah, it's just like my plane drink. All right, when we come back, we're going to talk about what Becca wants to talk about. And I know what it is already because I'm in trouble.

You're in trouble. I need to tell you about the greatest invention that has ever lived that is now sponsoring Lady Gang, which means they obviously know that I needed them. Word tune. Listeners out there, if you want to improve your entire team's writing right now at work, WordTune Teams is 50% off. WordTune basically knows what you're writing

as you're writing copy, websites, emails, pitch decks, whatever you're writing. They know how to make it better. They understand meaning. They know when you're using too many descriptive words. They know how to make your writing sound more eloquent. They know how to shorten a sentence. I mean, it's amazing. It's like having a real life editor sit next to you. And when you're not that great of a writer like me, and you also miss words and misspell words all the time, I just am a fast skimmer, you know, it's the best. WordTune improves writing up to four times. Better, faster writing means better business. Improves performance on any project, emails, press releases, sales outreach, customer service. And you can also use it for anything you're

writing online, including Google Docs, Slack, Outlook, web, and WhatsApp. And right now our listeners can get 50% off WordTune for Teams at wordtune.com slash lady. That's wordtune.com slash lady. This 50% discount is only available for a limited time and only available for teams. So head on over, wordtune.com slash lady. Today's episode of Lady Gang is brought to you by Capri Blue. So last night I got out all my Christmas decorations and I decorated my entire apartment. We are festive, we are living, and I just lit my Capri Blue Crystal Pine Glitz Signature Candle and I am feeling so festive.

I am in the holiday spirit and I love it. So Capri Blue's holiday looks and fragrances will take you from pumpkin spice season through the holidays and on to celebrating the new year the collections feature iconic festive fragrances along with the cult favorite volcano you guys have all smelled it it's delicious and they all have striking designs that will truly make a statement in any space i love their packaging they're so glittery and cute and gold and red and beautiful capri blue continues to deliver obsession worthy products must have staples and fragrances that you cannot live without making capri blue the perfect gift for the ones that you love and of course yourself

So for Lady Gang listeners, you can get 20% off your entire purchase. Go to capri-blue.com slash LG20. You can automatically receive 20% off your entire purchase or use code LG20 at checkout. Lady Gang, you know what I love more than Lady Gang? Just kidding, but very close, is Obey Fitness. I'm telling you, I didn't even realize they had meditation for anxiety and sleep as an option of the classes, but oh my God, they have expanded their classes to so many things. I get so busy during the holidays. We are so busy and that's why I love the 10 minute express classes I did a 10 minute express legs class the other day and it felt like I had done an hour workout the next morning Like they're just punched and you can do anything that's like not terrible obviously

But working out is not like my number one thing. I'd rather be online shopping. You can do anything for 10 minutes It's amazing. So whether you're new to fitness or you're fitness obsessed, you can find a workout on your level They have 15 plus class types including dance hits strength Pilates cardio boxing yoga and more the best in class instructors just aren't fitness experts. They're performers. So it's really fun to hang out with them and do your classes. And they have a packed live schedule. You can watch things on demand. They are so, so, so amazing. So the best part is if you want to try it, there's a whole free month for any of you Lady Gang members to get through the holidays with. Just use our code Lady Gang at Obey Fitness. That's O-B-E fitness.com and use the code Lady Gang. So I am a person who

has a lot of great ideas, but I don't really know anything about the business side of things. That's what I lean on Kelty for. But if I were going to start my own business without Kelty, I would use our sponsor Zen Business. It empowers you to turn your awesome idea into a money making company by helping you create, run, and grow your own business all from one platform. Get started today as low as $49 at zenbusiness.com slash lady. That's zenbusiness.com slash lady. So the Zen Business website is so cool. We love that it's an all-in-one platform that truly guides entrepreneurs with all the resources that they need to provide a badass business. They have articles, blogs, the Zen Business Academy page. It's just very cool. It offers a creative way

and how to run your business. So Zen Business has helped hundreds of thousands of people get their business off the ground by guiding them every step of the way and making it easier to launch successful business. Get started today as low as $49 at zenbusiness.com slash lady. That's zenbusiness.com slash lady. Zenbusiness.com slash lady. now back to the lady gang okay we're back i'm in trouble my marriage is fine everyone okay so kelty is as you all know dramatic like dramatic she stubs her toe and she is at an orthopedic surgeon getting a boot and a wheelchair so we all know this about her she is a fatalist she's a drama queen yes so if you're having a a like what is a tiff tiff a tiff a tiff a rift

a rift i don't know i don't know no a rift is like a that's a riff oh anyways so she is she's gonna like really expound upon the thing and ruminate and and be very vocal she's very vocal and expressive. Yes. Give her a few cocktails. Like she was calling it a Shakila, which was champagne and tequila. Do you remember her making that on stage? Yes. I remember her making it on stage. And Shakila is delicious. Wow. We should trademark that. Oh, Shakila. Cause it's like, it's champagne, which is easy to drink anywhere. You don't need a mix. Yeah. As the fun, fun girls. If you just want to take it up a notch, it's like when I used to put a shot of vodka in my sparks energy drink when I was younger. It's like, just get my back up there.

That's trashy. It's the adult version. Okay. Okay. Anyways. So Kelty, we all know is a drama queen. So if she is doing a live show and we've learned this from the years of doing live shows, if she and Chris have had any kind of an argument, like any kind of an argument, it could be the tiniest little thing. And she really does lean in to that, to that narrative. So she had Shaquille's all night. And by the end of the live show, you would have thought that the divorce papers were in the mail. Oh yeah. Well, and the thing is Kelty promised us she wouldn't talk about it. I don't remember talking about it, but also I accidentally filmed her saying that she wouldn't talk about her marriage crumbling and posted it on Instagram for a few hours before Becca told me to take it down.

Yeah. I was watching Instagram, like Jack's Instagram after the show and Kelty's in the video opening, opening up a lime with her fingers, fists, fists. And she's cause we don't have a knife backstage. So she's using her nails and she's literally like an orangutan opening up a lime. And in the background, I said, Kelty, you have to promise us tonight. You're not going to talk about leaving your husband because that's dramatic. And that's not true. And it lived on Jack's Instagram for too many hours. And I really hope that Chris and I did not hear it. I hope he, I don't think he watches my, I don't think he goes on Instagram to be honest. I think we're fine. He definitely goes on Instagram every day. He does. Well, he doesn't, I don't think he watches

my stories. He's a lurker. He definitely watches your stories. He's a lurker. All right. Well, that's okay. Yeah. Listen, my marriage is fine. Um, I also, I don't know what happened. Like, I don't know how we got from, we had one shot of tequila and then went on stage. and then we were on stage for like an hour and a half and you're fine. And then all of a sudden it hit me. Yes. But I don't remember the whole end. Well, the whole end, I wish I could forget. Yes. That's where, I mean, you guys, the show was like really good for like three fourths of the show. And then when Kelsey started imploding and we couldn't, we couldn't get it back because we did the live ask the lady gang do you remember that yeah okay you do yeah we did the live ask the

lady and then i started doing weird news for no reason well the thing is poor these all all these girls that were asking their questions and becca and i were trying to give them actual advice and you were just shouting random shit at them not like acknowledging them at all and like some girl asked like the nicest question you're like next question i did a demon i'm so well i actually talked to alex yesterday and i was like you know what i think moving forward we we have not learned our lesson we can't do ask the lady gang at the end of the show because everyone is too bombed so the questions aren't they're not clear or concise and then you are incapable of interacting with humans i'm so i think we have to fix the order or maybe cut the shaquillas yeah i agree

i like ask the lady gang i think it's a great section but i think we have to do it earlier like in the second yeah earlier in the night so i i got i got then we can end with a game or something because the game you can be fucked up like the wedding dress where kelty had all the girls create wedding dresses out of toilet paper for jack that was great great idea kelty thank you so much i'm so smart and honestly i wish that we had like better videos because the girls were very creative and all of them like actually looked like fashion pieces they really thought about it when i asked them and i was like what did you go and they're like this is a boob focus this is a low v this is a high slit like they really tried to get you dressed no it's amazing do you know

what occurred to me during the live show when that was going down and we put the microphone in front of them and told them to describe like what they did. We have, we have listeners and members of the lady gang with such witty personalities. So funny. Oh my God. Jesus Christ. They're funny. Why do I keep saying Jesus Christ? I'm so sorry. Jesus Christ. It's like I'm like Grandpa Joe. Holy smokes. it's not even that big of a thing no they are all so okay you're done no they're very funny people and i'm just like it makes me happy because funny people are listening to our podcast which means we are somewhat entertaining yeah no funny

And like, again, anytime I meet like a lady ganger out in the wild, they're so cool. I know. I mean, you just don't assume that, I don't know, like they're literally like cooler than we are. Well, yeah. I don't say that. I like to hope that I'm pretty cool. Wait, I was going to tell you something and I forgot.

Okay, cool. What else are we doing today, Kelty? No, we're talking about the show, but okay, hold on. Oh, I remembered. Okay. So after the show, you know, I don't remember anything. Oh, Kelsey went to the bank with a bunch of our mods. We'll talk about that.

But I want to tell you something. When I woke up on Sunday and I'm checking Instagram, I was like, wow, everyone had a great time. This looks so much, like so much fun. And then I was looking at my DMs and I was looking at the posts and there's one word to describe the show, which I would have not chosen that everyone's using. And that word is chaos. And as a producer, I'm feeling insecure about that because I didn't feel that chaotic to

me, but is my brain a hamster wheel? That's because you were blacked out. But for the 75%, it felt organized. Like we had a rundown, we had sections, we wish people happy birthday, then we did good week, bad week. I mean, I forgot good week, bad week. We had to come back to that. Like, I mean, yeah, okay.

It was chaos, but- But chaos in a good way. I think it was chaotic good, you know? Until I had to take Kelty's microphone away from her. Well, and then there was a point, Kelty, at the end of the show where you just shut off and you were just slouched in your seat eating a whole box of Toffafay. I ate two. With your vagina out.

Yeah. Possibly three boxes. I, Toffafay, you're my favorite. I love you so much. You shouldn't eat that many. Okay. I'm just going to let you guys know. I'm sure the serving size is two.

It's a snacking chocolate. It's not a meal chocolate. and i i felt are there meal chocolates i hope well like us a king size snickers or share size snickers that you're supposed to share with people but you just eat it as your meal that's a meal size i don't know that if that many people do that but okay a toffee is it's in tiny bite-sized pieces because it's meant for to share everyone at grandma's house has a toffee everyone at the party has a Toffifee. Toffifee in Canada. Okay. Anyway. Are you all right? No, I'm so fine. I just want to say this though. I had the best time. Oh, we know. But like the highlight for me was

Jack. When you brought Jared on stage to give him his presence. Can you talk about this? Because I'm the member of the lady gang that I got to witness both sides of it. So I witnessed your engagement where he had to be so nervous to do the thing. Well, tell the whole story. Yeah. Okay. So it was part of my bad week and it was bad week by proxy because Jared, when we got engaged, he was like, man, I really wish that I had something to signify that I was engaged. I don't get a ring or anything like that. So I decided that since he embarrassed me at his show, I would embarrass him and I would make like a big spectacle out of us getting engaged. So Kelty made a sash that said Jerry Vanik that we put on him, which I think is appropriate and

amazing. I got a boa. Did he keep it? Did he bring it home? Yeah, he kept it. Okay, good. He's very sentimental. Then I got him a tiara that says I'm getting married, which by the way, I searched forever for like a groomed tiara or like, you know, a male tiara, which they should have because there are many gay men getting married out there that also want a tiara that doesn't say like future misses on it yeah and they don't have them um and then I got like this big oversized like huge ring so then I proposed to him I got down on a knee and he acted all surprised and like his like reaction was actually really funny I was watching videos of it and yeah I mean like a big a big thing for him so he had his moment as well it was very cute it's really cute

to see him like nervous and not nervous on stage because at the main concert when he proposed to you he was like his head was like he didn't know where to look and his like arms were kind of flappy and he was like okay guys i'm just gonna do it i'm gonna do it and then yeah he had like this whole thing he was gonna say and he's like i i guess i'm just gonna do it now yeah yeah and then for you when you were doing this thing he was like it was like fucking showtime at the apollo he was like i'm a showman let me give you face he was like playing to the audience like yeah should i accept this oh like he was just really giving me full jerry and i was like wow it was really cute and then you brought him up on stage again when we did the top of a cake and but you

didn't like you're like jerry come back up on stage and then like you gave him no direction or me so we're just like sitting there sitting well you guys like you're like dancing around and I'm like, Jared, I actually don't. You were supposed to cut the cake and feed it to each other like Brian Groom. How did you not know that? Well, he's like, should I smush this on your face? I was like, we have the whole half of the show. So probably not. Like maybe that should have been in like an end of the show thing. I mean, for sure. And I've learned so much. I forgot how to produce a show. I'm going to get it together for the next tour. We'll do things in the correct order. So if we want to smash a cake, we can smash it. I will say, as you know, very well,

everyone i've been on the katie weber reset and i took a small reset break for the weekend and i was really looking forward to munching on that cake and what happened well i'll tell you what happened when we come back it is so hard to find the perfect gift for your man during the holidays and that's why we're so excited that travis matthew is a sponsor of lady gang they have a handy holiday gift guide you can browse gifts for him by price point or through curated collections tailored to his interest and personality you'll need some button-ups polos outerwear ultra soft loungewear shoes accessories new gear for golfers and so much more it's pretty much guaranteed that you're going to find something that he loves that you love to look at him man travis matthews is

excited to announce their new heater active line it's crafted from performance fabrics their heater active line tees shorts pants jackets and more move with him this is the pants that chris got that he loves they're like just a little bit stretchy so so so nice so visit a travis matthew retail store or make your way to travismatthew.com slash podcast and take 20 off your travis matthew order when you use the code lady20 at checkout. That's 20% off your entire order at travismatthew.com slash podcast when you use the code lady20 at travismatthew.com slash podcast. T-R-A-V-I-S-M-A-T-H-E-W dot com slash podcast. Today's episode is brought to you by Seed. So I have a not so fun fact for you. Two out of three Americans live with digestive discomfort. This is including bloating,

prolonged fullness and poop issues. I am one of those two out of three. And if you're listening, chances are you probably are too, but that's why I love our sponsor Seed because they're working to change that. So they have this thing called the Daily Synbiotic. It supports benefits in and beyond the gut. That's including gastrointestinal function, skin health, heart health, and gut immune function, gut barrier integrity, and micronutrient synthesis of vitamins B9 and B12. I don't even know what that is, but it sounds amazing. And many see improvements in digestion within 24 to 48 hours, which can include bowel movement, regularity, and ease bloating.

I've been using Seed for a few months, and it has made me so much more regular, and I love it. So start a new healthy habit today. Visit Seed.com slash Lady and use code Lady to redeem 20% off your first month of Seed's daily symbiotic. That's Seed.com slash Lady and use code Lady. Lady Gang is brought to you by Rareform, and this was actually very helpful. when we were in Austin, we loaded up all our merch and our backstage stuff and all of the

things we needed into these really cool bags. So Rareform repurposes highway billboards into one-of-a-kind bags and accessories. Every product is cut from a billboard. No two will ever be the same. They're designed for style and function, and they're really strong. And their mission is to bring goods that bring vibrancy, sustainability, and practicality to everyday life. Get your gifting done early and find your exact bag at rareform.com slash lady. That's rareform.com slash lady. So Rareform recycles over 80% of the billboards in the country from New York to LA to Nashville. They collect 500,000 pounds of billboard every single month. You know, billboards only up for four to six weeks. Don't I know it? And billboards can't typically be recycled. And so

this is so cool. So if you want to get someone a really interesting, cool, fashionable holiday gift this year, go check out Rareform at rareform.com slash lady. Get your gifting done early and find your exact bag at rareform.com slash lady. That's rareform.com slash lady. This episode of Lady Gang is brought to you by BetterHelp. BetterHelp is the most amazing online therapy. Is there something interfering with your happiness or preventing you from achieving your goals?

Well, BetterHelp will assess your needs and match you with your own licensed professional therapist and you can start communicating in under 48 hours. And I have to tell you something, I'm giving this as a Christmas gift this year. I feel like so many people need this and a lot of times you're like, well, I want to take care of everyone else in my life except myself. And so you should either sign up yourself or, like me, gift it to a friend who really needs

therapy and is kind of scared to ask for help. You're going to get timely and thoughtful responses, plus you can schedule weekly video or phone sessions so you won't ever have to sit in an uncomfortable waiting room as you do with traditional therapy. Our listeners get 10% off their first month of online therapy at betterhelp.com slash ladygang. Join the over 2 million people who have taken charge of their mental health with the help of an experienced professional. That's betterhelp.com slash lady gang. You're listening to the lady gang. Okay. So we're back. So the cake was freaking delicious. Made by a lady ganger, Dominique. It was so cute. It said elder emo engagement. Yeah. The cake was so beautiful,

but it looked so good. And I was like, that's fine. I'm not going to eat it on stage. But when we go back to the dressing room after I'm going to smash a giant piece of this cake because reset starts again on Monday. You know what I mean? Reset break. Reset break. So then we had to go to the bank. So after the show, the number one thing that happens at the show is everyone's like, where are you going for drinks after let's all hang out. And what they don't realize is that we have no staff. So after the show, we're drunkenly in our new, new heels and velvet dresses, packing up merch and bringing down signs and putting the chairs in the U-Haul. Like there's no after drinks on the rooftop. Like not yet. We're not Chelsea Handler yet. Like we

need more people on, you know, so we're going nowhere. We're going to return the balloon set to the balloon people. Do you know what I mean? So anyway, so everyone's like, Oh my God, where you going? And then I get this text from Alex and she's like, Hey, I need, I need this cash money. Cause we need to tip the bartender. We need to tip all these people. We didn't think about it. And I was like, no problem. I'm going to go, I'm going to go to the ATM. I don't know where we went, but it felt like we were gone for four hours. It felt like that to us too. I like ran into you on the street when you're like marching back from the ATM and you had, you had my bride. Some of our lady gangers had these really cute cowboy hats

that said lady on them which by the way we should definitely sell his merch one day um but they made me a cowboy hat that said bride on it it's white and it had like cute little diamond danglies so cute anyways kelty took it upon herself to now be the owner of that hat so she was wearing the bride hat marching down the streets of austin with our mods from our facebook group who i thought and i'm gonna say this girls i thought you were the responsible ones in the group i did not realize is that they were blasted too. Oh yeah. You were all blasted. So I thought that the mods were taking me to the ATM, but it turns out we were just blind leading the blind, walking around the streets of Austin in circles, looking for the 7-Eleven that was literally two steps away,

but we went the wrong direction. We went to 17 banks. Nothing was open because everything in Austin closes. That's a whole other chilly situation for Thursday we need to talk about. But anyway, I ended up getting the cash. I got back. But by the time I got back, The cake was gone. Everything was packed up. They literally shoved me in a car and took me away. You needed to get shuttled. I was like, what about my purse? What about my things? I don't know. Thank you guys for packing up my things. What is Orly doing right now? Getting a back massage. Okay. She's living. Anyway, we had the best time. I really feel so inspired. The light does hurt,

but did you guys feel happy though? It makes me sad that we're not doing it again until the fall of next year. Yeah, me too. I know, but it was a good little taste, a taste of the goodness of people a lot more of that next year. Yeah. Yep. And I also think like, are we going to, I'm thinking about a dress code and I don't want to wear heels. So I got to figure out what that is. Like, is it a slipper party? Is it an orthotic party? Anyway, you guys, thank you for everyone that came to austin we had the best time ever um i hope you got a sense of the show um and we'll do more next fall and it was so good to see you guys in person i know it was so nice my favorite person i also liked that a lot of girls were like were there as guests of lady gangers and they had never

seen us heard of us anything before and now they're gonna listen to the podcast they said so welcome to the tribe we'll see if you do it was a very good representation of who we are yes if you enjoyed that you're welcome sloppy chaos the sloppy chaos tour

coming to a city near yours okay well we weren't nope we will see you next Tuesday thanks for listening the lady gang is produced by Alex Ingber Steve Delameter and Jared Monaco make sure you subscribe rate and review

our podcast and if you love it share it with your friends on social media like oh my god i just listened lady gang this episode's so great swipe up to listen and if you really want to which we know you do please follow us on social at kelty at becca at jack vanek and at the lady gang sign up for our newsletter at the lady gang.com and join our secret facebook group it's super fun see you next tuesday