LadyGang - Becca's Baby Bible Book Drama & The Nicolas Cage Breakup Curse

Episode Date: September 22, 2026

Becca opens a baby gift she did NOT see coming, sending the girls into an honest conversation about religion, boundaries, and what happens when someone puts their beliefs into your nursery. (AND a very close reading of Adam and Eve that does not go well for Eve.) PLUS: Becca's headed to a Paris Glee convention, Keltie learns a life changing phrase from Ashley Hesseltine, and Jac's fertility doctor keeps calling her at happy hour. PLUS: Everything you could do in 1999 that you can't do now — and a theory that Nicolas Cage may be a spiritual breakup harbinger!We have fall deals for YOU!Macy's: Spruce up your fall wardrobe! Head to Macys.com or shop in-store!Nutrafol: Get $10 off your first month’s subscription and free shipping at Nutrafol.com and use code LGPOD.Talkiatry: Looking for an in‑network psychiatrist? Head to Talkiatry.com/lady to complete the short assessment and get matched.Nuna Baby: Visit Nunababy.com or head to your local Nordstrom!Merit Beauty: Get your Signature Makeup Bag FREE with your first order at MeritBeauty.comClean Simple Eats: Shop the best tasting protein powder at CleanSimpleEats.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Quick question. Why have men had a pill for their sex drive since 1998 and women don't? Oh, wait, we do. It exists. Almost nobody knows about it. And there's an entire documentary about why. It's called The Pink Pill. It's on Paramount Plus and Amazon Prime and it will make you insane. So watch it. Then come to our party, September 29th. We're going live in our pink pajamas with Cindy Eckert, the woman who made that pill to talk about all of it. RSP inside the Facebook group because tickets for the stream are already sold out. Well, what is this? Welcome to the Lady Gang. That's amazing. Say that again. The Lady Gang. Things are about to change around here. Each week, we catch up with Hollywood's hottest girl posse.

Keltie Knight, Becca Tobin, and Jack Vanek. Hello, hello, welcome to the Lady Gang. I am Becca Tobin here at Jack Vanek and Kelsey Knight. What's up? You know, I'm wearing a Lady Gang hat, and Derek was our model for it. And I'm feeling bad that we're using his likeness without compensation. So if you could go buy the last four hats that are available, they're on sale for $10 at the ladygang.com. That would be great. Thanks.

That's a good hat. That is a good hat. I love his hat is blue and then white with the red lady gang. It's very 4th of July. It was the Americana collection. But it's good. It looks good with everything, a white t-shirt or whatever. It's true.

I got my hair color fixed. Let me see it. Oh, look at you. It looks good. Wow. I mean, not in this very moment. but it will. The color looks really good.

It looks good. She's growing out. Did you go to Leanne? Yeah. She's the best. She laughed so hard at me. Why? Because it was so bad?

Yeah. She loves like that's how you get. Yeah. I know. She went in and like thinned it real short in the back like underneath the layers so that it just puffs up. Like I need the weight. When you have short hair, you need the weight to hold it down. Anyway, live your life.

People are sick of talking about my hair. Who wants, let's. Start the show. Okay, it's time for. Good week. Yes, it is. Bad week. Oh, no.

I'm going to go. I'm excited about this. Okay. We're doing a Glee convention in Paris in March. Oh, yeah. I just saw. And we haven't done one of these in probably 10 years. So we used to go.

What is it? So it's like a con. So you know when people buy tickets and they go to like get autographs or take pictures or do Q&As or what? whatever. It's just like for any fan of the thing, you buy a ticket for the weekend and then you get to and there's like all a cart. You can have like a meet and greet with somebody or this or that or whatever. But I'm so excited for multiple reasons. We haven't done one of these in a really long time. Paris is obviously Paris. It's incredible. And we're going in March, the end of March. So I feel like

it could be perfection. The group that's going is so good and they just keep adding people to it. It's who's going. Yeah. Let's see. Kevin. Heather. Amber. Cord.

Me. Jacob. Who else? Jenna might be going. We're not sure yet. Did I say Heather? Yeah. Yeah.

Anyways, it's a really fun group and I'm so excited. That's going to be so fun. Yeah. One of my most favorite trips of my life was a Paris convention probably 10 years ago. And I went with Jenna and our friend, Alexis. You guys know Alexis Woodall, who was on the podcast. She came to do some sort of panel, and we went shopping and we bought Celine bags. And it was just like the most magical drink champagne, partied, went out and partied very hard. Yeah. Kevin was there at that one too. So that's

my good week. My bad week is I was like trying, I was wrestling with if I was going to tell this one because it's going to be a little bit of a landmine of, I don't know, but I'm going to gonna because this is I don't like to hold back because this is our lives and this is just real feelings and this is what I'm going to share. So my friend put together a very, very sweet, uh, gift for the baby, which is having all of my friends send books for the, like to create Myers first library. Your favorite kids books and you write a little message and whatever. And it was a lot of people. It was neighbors. It was this. It was that. It was whatever. Um, and going through the box of books. and it's really sweet, so good.

And I get to this one book that just kind of like stops me a little bit. And it's Baby's First Bible Stories. Oh. And I don't care what anybody wants to do in their own home. I truly respect whatever it is that you want to do in your own home and whatever it is that you want to teach your own kid and what I don't care. But when it comes to putting that on, to someone else that you are this person kind of knows where where I am with all of that and so it's

very confusing to me if it's just a Texas thing that it's just such a common thing to have but it's also like but you're you're in your 40s you're not old you're not dumb you're not you're worldly so this feel it just feels so strange because I'm not going to teach my kid with in the Bible because we're not, we don't go to church and we're not like organized religious. But this is weird because it was like mostly close friends, right? People who know me well enough to know. You're Jewish and Zach is like Southern religious. You know what I mean?

Yeah. Yeah, but it's like obviously it's this person knows that we don't go to church. This person knows that I'm, you know, it knows me well enough. So then I just was I was bummed out. I miss the times when people kind of kept those things. You know, it's like you don't go to dinner

and you don't talk about politics and you don't talk about religion. Like that's just, you know, now it's different. You have to sort of like in certain places. It's important to talk about what's happening in the world, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Like I get that.

But there are also times that it's appropriate to also not put on your own beliefs or push your own stuff onto other people. I miss those days of like keeping it yourself. Two things I want to say. Number one, devil's advocate, literally, from hell where you're going. Yeah. It's a fiery place in hell, which I'm sure. Devil's advocate. I think that sometimes I've had this in my life too, when sometimes they actually don't even care that you're not religious. This is like a, people are like, I'm praying for you. The thing they do. The gospel. They're just like,

this is just part of who they are. They're like, here's a Christmas ornament, even though you're Jewish. Do you know what I mean? It's just like it's their version of well wishes. So you have to decide if you think was this malicious, like your baby's going to hell if they don't have God in their life? Or was this just like, you know, like I go to things with Chris's family and we pray around the table because it's grace. And I'm like, I'm happy to give grace because it's just a beautiful tradition that is important to them that I partake in. So you have to decide that. Number two, are you going to f*** them or are you going to let them? Because let them, let them send me the baby book about the gospel and not Dolly Parton.

Or are you going to say, hey, I got the book. I just want to make sure you don't think my baby's going to hell. Just checking in. Just checking in. Are we good? You know I'm Jewish, right? Yeah. I don't think it's malicious.

I think it's a little not ignorant, but maybe. Ignorant is what I mean. able to put yourself in the position of the other person. And listen, I do grace. I say, I do these things that are asked of me or are not required, but things that are important to people that I love. Like it's just that I have a lot of respect for and I will do it. It's just it's my kid. It's like you're assuming I'm going to sit there. And I, I don't know, we might have to take this out, but I have got to tell you. I opened up the book and I read the story about Adam and Eve. And it is crazy, you guys. The version that the kids get of Adam and Eve,

what is it? Tell us what it is. He bites the apple and gets pregnant or something, right? Okay, okay, hold on, hold on. It's wild. Okay, so the title, Babies first Bible stories. No, he takes a piece of her bone. Also, the whole thing is definitely AI. Okay, Adam and Eve.

God made a man called Adam and a woman named Eve. He gave them a home in a beautiful garden called Eden. Eden was full of flowers, trees, and fruit. There were birds and butterflies of many different colors. There were animals of every shape and size. Beautiful. Some were wild and some were tame. Adam and Eve looked after all the animals and gave them names.

Adam and Eve loved their wonderful home and they were very happy. God was generous to Adam and Eve. He is generous to you too. That's the version the kids get. But isn't the real version about the apple? Isn't it like a lesson? That's just setting the scene for the story. Yeah.

Adam cuts open her rib and like puts it in him, right? And they make a baby? Isn't it? The whole thing is like it's the poisonous apple. fault. Yes. Like, so hold on, people are probably yelling at us. There's not. There's not. That's the end. That's it. They just take care of the animals. Okay, you know what? That's what. That's truly just the very beginning of the story. You can't be mad because honestly, the only thing we're mad about is the title because it's not a Bible story. Adam from dust and the ground and breathed him to light. God plays Adam and, this is what I'm seeing on the internet. God placed Adam in Paradise, Garden of Eden to care for it. Seeing that Adam was alone, God created Eve from Adam's rib while he slept. Yeah. The couple lived in a state of

innocence, naked and unashamed with full fellowship with God. God permitted them to eat from any tree in the garden except one, the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. A crafty serpent tempted Eve telling her the fruit would make them wise like God. She ate the forbidden fruit and gave some to Adam who also ate it. This act of disobedience is known in theology as the fall of man, introducing sin, shame, and morality into the world. And of course, it's the woman's fault. that dude. So it's like, so I'm like, if you're going to tell, that's how, this is how I feel. I'm like, if you want to tell my kid the story of the Bible, give him the whole story.

Give her the whole story. Let her know that women to fuck everything up. Yeah, let her know from the day she's born that she is the reason why everything is wrong in this world. And was made from the rib of a man. Like, I'm sorry, no. But then where were babies made? Exactly. Where was out of made?

Made. Made. Egg that they went into my body and took out forcefully. No, I'm just kidding. Okay. But this is why, okay, now Becca, I know you're not doing this because you have so many things going on. But I did pitch an idea to Becca that I do think she should do. A children's book?

A children's book about, like, you know, the children's books are always like the stork, the whatever. But like there's all these gay couples, couples like Becca. I had a meeting about this, but there aren't enough people who would buy the book who are part of these types of untraditional, non-traditional ways to create family. Why don't you self-publish like me on Amazon? You can make $10 whole dollars. Yeah, yeah, no. But there should be a baby book that's like, and then the stork medically induced her into a coma. Her legs went into strips.

And put a four-inch noodle into her belly and took some microscopic eggs and put it in a petri dish. And then God went into Adam and took some of his rib and semen and mixed it together in a mixology. He watched a nude video of Eve, the naughty video, and she jizzed and checked off. Into a tiny paper cup in which then. Yeah. Anyways, I know people are upset with me. I know people that are extremely Christian are upset with me right now. But it's just like, please respect how I'm living my life.

I'm going to respect how you. I'm not going to talk shit on you. I'm not going to talk trash. I'm not going to do anything. But I don't want you to introduce or try to introduce things into my kid's life that I myself am not introducing into my life. Also, don't you think that if I, I'm 40 years old, I know I've heard about the Bible. I've heard about this thing called church. Don't you think I would have already been attending?

if I something that I was interested in doing so. I don't think it was malicious. No, it's not. God bless them. God bless America. I think you should just let them. Oh, yeah. I'm not doing anything about it.

I mean, I threw the book away, but I'm not going to do anything about it. Like I'm never going to, I said thank you for the books. There were other books within the book, which I'm grateful that I could say thank you for the other books that were like of non-religious, whatever. But yeah, probably shouldn't have been admitted to throwing that book away. but it was personalized and I didn't want to donate it because then I didn't want it to get back around that like, you know, someone could have gone to the local Goodwill

and been like, wow. Right. I'm dying for the day that happened. It's like when I see someone selling their lady gang merch on Poshmark and I was like, damn, you moved on. It does hurt. I'm like, honestly, that sweater was amazing. I know.

And you're like, you're getting rid of this piece of history right now. This relic? How dare you? And while I say, I don't. know people are going to, sorry, I just have to say this one thing because I know people are going to come from me and be like, but maybe it's just introducing, like, why is it not okay to just introduce information about like educating them on all religions, blah, blah, blah, blah. I want to turn the tables and say that if I were to drop off a book about Judaism for her newborn baby, that would not be received

well at all either. Yeah. You know, it's not about, it's not a book about all religions. It's about one specific religion. And so that's, that's, I just had to say my piece on that because I don't want to get DMs about it. So thank you so much for my TED Talk. No, it's actually a great lesson. I'm going to turn it into a lesson of like, you know, not everyone's the same. And when you live in an area of earth where there's a lot of similarity to the people like Texas is, you are not seeing, like, you know, like this is someone who I grew up not seeing black people in real life until I moved to New York City. You know what I mean? I just wasn't in a place that there was. a lot of there were a lot of other cultures, but there wasn't a ton of diversity in that. And so,

you know, like, if you don't know, you don't know. And so there's a lot, there's always something to learn. So we're going to do that. So you guys, I was just sorry, I got to talk about this for a second. I was just recently at the mall by my house. Love a mall. Which has, you know, Bloomingdale's on one side. And then it's got like a bunch of stores in between a lush, which is amazing, a Sephora. And then on the other, other side, it's the Macy's, but I always park in the Macy's side and walk through because, as we've talked about, one of the adult pleasures of life is walking through a department store. And one thing I noticed, and I don't know if it was because I went to a Beazza with Rachel Zoe this summer, but like,

boho is back. Oh, yeah. It's everywhere. Yeah. We partnered with Macy's to let you know that the key pieces are lace dresses, skirts, silky fabrics, flowy dresses, warm browns, chocolate hazelnut, camel, cacky, rose pinks. It's like crochet lace, the big sleeves, the big, shapeless. I love boho. You know, I love this too because when I did my color analysis, boho, those colors

that the boho world are, it's like a little bit more muted, a little creamy, a little lacy, a little like whimsical. That is my preferred color, color wheel, whatever you, palette.

And Macy's has some really, really cute, like Sienna-esque. Ooh. Boho. Remember? She was such a boho icon. Do you do boho, Jack? I mean, I feel like I lived and breathed boho in like the 2010s.

Your like early Coachella was very bohoy. Fringe. Very, very bow. Like a boho with like a little bit of grunge. Yeah, lots of fringe, lots of the dresses, but like mixed to the combat boot. Like I have to give it like a little bit of masculine energy. I can't just go full boho. Right. Yeah. Macy's has stylists that are there to help. Go into the Macy's store or go online and you get free access to personal stylists and they'll literally help you pick out your clothes. I bought this like great fringe jacket in Paris and I was like, I'm so obnoxious. When am I ever going to wear this? And then I was walking through Macy's and I was like, wait, there's like a hundred fringe jackets. I was like, I'm right on time. I'm so stylish. And that's something like that never goes out of style.

No. The fringe is so good. Yeah. And it makes you feel fun and like a little extra possess. So if you're thinking about what you're trying to wear this fall, we partnered with Macy's to just let you know that the key pieces are like lace dresses, lace skirts, silky, silky fabrics, like everything, flowy dresses, which is so nice. When you're on your period and you're bloated, you just wear a big silky dress, a big cardigan and a combat boot. Done. Sort of warm animal prints like the leopard and that kind of thing. Warm browns, chocolate hazelnut, camel, khaki, rose pinks, golden tones, soft neutrals, right in Becca's color palette. And don't forget, Macy's has stylists that are.

there to help eager to tackle this trend. You can just go into the Macy's store or go online and you get free access to personal stylists and they'll literally help you pick out your clothes, which is amazing. Thank you, Macy's, and thank you for making this episode of Lady Gang possible. You little romantic boho bitches. Thank you. Nutraful is the number one dermatologist recommended hair growth supplement brand and it's the number one hair growth supplement brand personally used by dermatologists. Right now, Nutraful is offering our listeners $10 off your first month subscription and free shipping when you visit Nutrafol.com and enter promo code LGPod. I love it. It's so easy. I literally had to have my hair braided up into like a whole mess because

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NutraFol.com, promo code LGPod. So you've been doing talk therapy for a while now. We are very proud of you. But baby, you need something more to work in conjunction with it. Let's talk about talkiatry. They offer 100% online psychiatry practice. They provide services like comprehensive evaluations and diagnoses for conditions like ADHD, anxiety, depression, and more. Kelty and I have talked very openly about our experience with our psychiatrists and how valuable it has been in our life. Unlike therapy-only platforms, talkiety is psychiatry. You're seeing a medical provider who can diagnose mental health conditions and prescribe medication when it's appropriate. They have over 800 clinicians

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and get matched with an in-net network psychiatrist in just a few minutes. That's T-A-L-K-I-T-R-Y. Dot-T-R-Y dot-com slash lady to get matched in minutes. Talkaiatry.com slash lady. Now back to the Lady Gang. I will tell you my good week now. Thank you.

That I learned from Ashley Heseltine, our friend, who hosts a Girl's Got to Eat podcast and has her great comedy special. She was on a few weeks ago. I recently went on their podcast to promote my book. I don't know if you guys knew or wrote a book. Probably haven't heard about it. there was like a really funny thing on Reddit that someone made a fake Facebook post that said

Marked Safe from buying Kelty's book today. You know, if we were like Mark safe from like, we mark safe from the hurricane on Facebook. You know what I mean? They're like. Yeah. But where's just on the podcast? No, no, not on the podcast. This was just on Reddit because I talk about it so much.

Kelsey, stop looking on Reddit. My God. No, no. This was all during the same look. I'm done now. Oh, my God. Don't. That thing good comes from this.

I've been having this problem where I've been working so hard that I am getting, I don't know if you can see the end of it. I'm getting blisters on my elbows because I'm spending so much time at my computer typing and I need like a little arm. Why are your elbows on the desk? They are on the desk and they're going back and forth as I'm typing. I don't know. It's just my posture when I'm typing.

I don't keep them up. But like that's, wait, that's the weirdest thing I've ever heard. Anyway. Yeah. Like on the ends of your elbows. How can you possibly... It's just right here. No, but what are...

Why are you putting your elbows on... How can you even... My elbows are hanging in front of the desk as I type. They are? Mine or not. Mine are on here and they're like this. Weird. And I'm typing like this.

You need to move your computer closer to the end of the table. Yeah, and then you're fine. Listen, it's all my fault. Everything's my fault, guys. Okay, fine. It's my fault. Okay. Anyway, so it was really funny because we started having this conversation and

Ashley is so funny, but she said something that is staying with me forever. And it is new. It's new. I'm taking it for Lady Gang. I already told her. It's new in the virology of like past the salt, roll the tape. Like it's this good. So she goes, oh no, elbows. Big problems there. And I was like, yeah. And she's like, you know, I saw a picture of me this summer. I'm in my bikini. And she's like, and I'm just, I'm feeling so good about myself and I'm sexy and take this picture. And then she's like, and then I see my elbow. And like there's nothing good that can come out of like spot. your own elbow. And I was like, I know. And like the elbow is old and there's nothing you can do because we were talking about like facelifts and all this thing. And I was like, there's nothing you can do

about your elbow. Like your hands, Dolly Parton wore the gloves, Paris Hilton wears the gloves. You can kind of fix your hands. You can kind of fix your knees now, but your elbow is old no matter what. And she goes, you know what I just think about elbows? She goes, my elbows are none of my business. And I was like, I love this because it's like the stuff that, like it's true, what my elbows look like, I can't see my elbows. No, they're facing backwards, baby. I know it's behind me. I know it's ugly.

It's none of my business. And so I just started using it for random things. It's not my business. Do you know what I mean? Like that would have been good for my bad week. It's just none of my business. Yeah. It's like my elbows.

It's not of my business. It's really none of my business. Like what's happening around me? None of my business. Like what people think about me. It's like this, it's the same thing of saying like, Brupall came on and said if those bills, if those girls ain't paying,

your bills pay those bitches no mind. It's the same thing. Like my elbows are none of my business. But what you're saying behind my back has been a phrase, a very well-known phrase for a long time. Okay. Okay. Okay. So we're not trademarking in Jack. Okay. All right. My bad week is, this is from two weeks ago, but I wanted to bring it up because it's so funny. As you know, I have been on a lifelong quest to be an it girl. And I shall never achieve the mountain top of it girldom. But there's a new it girl in Hollywood. Mary Beth Barone, who's a comedian. So Mary Beth Barone is a comedian, and she has been doing comedy. She's worked her ass off for a long time. She has been grinding on the comedy circuit for a long time. And she really sort of had a breakout moment last year at about a year ago at the Golden Globes,

where she was doing the interviews and she was just so funny. She looked beautiful. But what I've learned about Mary Beth Barone is that she's very into fashion, like archival fashion. And I always say fashion plays such an important role in Hollywood. What you wear on the red carpet can make or break. you. And she's been that girl that she had this breakout moment, a little bit like Nikki Glazer where like she had this breakout moment and then she just followed it up with like going to the right parties, having the right publicist, wearing the right dresses. And so she had a big Netflix special that came off. It did really well. And during when she, I had said something about her on the cutting room floor months ago and was like, I think she was great, blah, blah. She saw it. We were like,

DMing a little on Instagram. And I was like, you got to come on Lady Gang. She was like, I was loved to. Then when I followed up to ask her on Lady Gang, we never heard a response. And I was like, she's busy. Like, that's how it always goes, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So Chris is on his way to the Venice Film Festival. And he's like, he sends me a list of all of the people that are going to the Armani dinner that one of his clients is going.

And he was like, who are these people? Do I need to know any of these people? And it's like Carlos Sands, the like F1 driver. It's Nicholas Galestine who played Anne Hathaway's love, love person in that cute Netflix movie where he played in the band and she falls in love with the young guy. that I love so much. Anyway, it's all those, Sidney, Sweetie, it's like all these people.

And I was like, oh, Mary Beth Barone is on the list. She's going to the fucking Armani dinner in Venice. Like, you go, girl. And I was like, she's the one. Please go say hi to her. Tell her, you know me. Like, you can be friends with her. I don't know anyone else on this list.

Because he's going to be alone, right? And so, anyway. So funny. So he writes me and he's like, saw MBB. She brought her mom. She's really great. Says hi.

says, oh, yeah, I need to do her podcast. My bad week is what happened next, which is I, in my desperation, was seeing all these pictures of her and I follow on her social media and I DM'd her and I just said, oh, my God, my hubby said he ran into you, you look gorge. And then she wrote back and said, oh, he's so sweet and so tall. And then here's my bad week. She goes, you should have come. And my bad week is just that like, you couldn't. I couldn't because I wasn't invited. How sweet of her. But that's why, like, you know, it's really like the naivete that she just thinks that

it's just a dinner. She's like, I'm here. I'm like B-list adjacent. You could be here too. Just dream harder. Wear a little vintage Eliah, you know? Get a better team. Did she?

Because I was like, I can't come very, Beth. You have to be invited to the Armani dinner. Like, nobody invited me. Chris Knight, the manager. of the actual star that was invited does not get to bring a plus one. Did you see her on Seth Myers talking about her PR relationship that they set her up? She was so, I thought she was joking. Oh, I think I did see this.

Who was it with? Wait, was she serious? She was, I think she was serious. Who did they set her up with? It was somewhat, and we saw the pictures, right? Yeah, they went to like a basketball game together. But who was this Lucas something? Lucas Bravo?

Who's that? Oh yeah, the actor from he's the hot guy on Emily and Paris. Yes. Oh, yes, yes. They probably have the same publicist and they're like, this will be hot. And she was like not into him, right? No. And like it's just so funny that she.

Admitted it. Talks about it. Yeah. It's just so good. I really like her. Like I would have loved to have been invited. Thank you, Mary Beth Brown. Maybe next time don't bring your mom and bring me.

As your plus one. No, she has a TV show with Benny Drama called Overcompensating, and it's so good. I love it. I love it. I really like her, and I'm happy for her. I just thought it was really funny. That's really funny. At least she's not a douche.

I like, yeah. You should have come. Yes. He should have come. Well, some of us have to podcast from our office for $4. Thank you so. No, I had the best summer of my life. Okay.

Jack. Okay, so my good week is something that I saw on TikTok. it was this girl, and she was telling a story about how she has run into Nicholas Cage three different times in her lifetime, and how after every single run-in, she breaks up with the boyfriend that she's with at the time. And she really thinks that, like, Nicholas Cage is spiritually guiding her throughout her life. And it wasn't just like, she, like, lived, I don't know, in New York City or something. So she saw him once there. And then she saw him at, like, a random bar in Tokyo, Japan. And then she saw him somewhere else, like, across the world. And then every encounter is this very Nicholas Cage type encounter where he's, like,

wearing a full leather outfit and he acts super weird. And then her and her boyfriend, like, discuss it. And then within a month, they're broken up. And I'm like, I love this idea. This is a premise for a TV show. Right? And also Nicholas Cage is so crazy, like the face-off movie. Like, he's so weird.

So weird. And he's like, coo-cokey, coo-cookey, man. Well, and I know he's like just the same in person. Like I think he's a very bizarre individual. And then somebody else had commented on the video or made their own video that they're like, this happened to me too. I ran into Nicholas Cage and I broke up with my boyfriend right after. He's the grim Reaper. Yes.

Isn't that amazing? You know what I would love. I would love a housewives type show with Jeff Goldblum, Nicholas Cage, John Travolta. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. So good. Is it Al Pacino? Not Appalachino. Who's the one who's in Fokker-in-law and like meet the fuckers? Oh. Robert De Niro? Yeah. Robert De Niro. Because Robert De Niro's super weird too. Like he hates an interview, can barely speak to you. Like he's just so. Yeah. Did I ever tell you my story when I saw Jeff Goldblum at the airport and he was walking around like he had a Ramo's suitcase and he was just like kind of strolling around the airport just waiting for people to recognize him. Like he loved it. And I'm like, this is so exactly how I would think he would be. And then I, I'm like, this is so exactly how I would think he would be. And then I,

I had posted about it and somebody commented. They're like, I saw him at Whole Foods doing the exact same thing. Like he, he's like, notice me. I'm the best. I'm the coolest guy that's ever existed. But he is the coolest guy. He is the coolest. He's so cool.

I just looked up because I remember hearing that Nicholas Cage is like a collector of odd things. And I just picked it. Well, potential, I mean, maybe. But also he outbid Leonardo DiCaprio for a 67 million year old dinosaur skull because he collects. Yeah. Yes. Dinosaurus cold. I mean, this man is spending his money correctly, if you ask me. Agreed.

It's like pygmy shrunken heads. Oh, my God. Doesn't he have a pet octopus? Two albino king cobras. You know that guy. This is, ew. Ew. Ew. Okay. Anyways. Okay. So my bad week, I am getting closer and closer to doing our embryo transfer. It's getting very, very real. And so we've been having. appointments at CCRM, like we went and got our blood drawn to like do the infectious disease panel and all that kind of stuff. So I've been having more conversations with my doctor, who is amazing. But the problem is that she calls me and she has called me the last three times while I have been out drinking. And it makes me feel very irresponsible and like a bad future pregnant person because she calls. you know, she's wrapping up her day.

It's at the end of the day. And a lot of times she's been calling on Friday afternoon. Oh, wow. And the first time that she had called on a Friday afternoon, it was the day of Jared's show in Anaheim that I was doing a little pregame with some of my friends. And we were in a very loved restaurant. And I had answered the phone. And she was like, I'm so sorry.

Like, it sounds like you're having a really good time. And I'm like, I am. And then I'm like trying to have this conversation about her or with her about like, I don't even remember what we're talking about. Did you have to answer? Well, I wanted to because it's like, I don't know when I can get her on the phone next. You know, it's usually like a receptionist or something.

And I had been, oh, it was asking about my iron levels because obviously I got iron infusions and I can't take regular iron. So it was boring stuff. So I was asking what her advice would be. And it's, yeah, the past, she just called me two days ago when I was out having a happy hour at a really loud restaurant. And I'm like, wow, she must think that, I am not ready for this big

No, you're just getting it in while you still can. Get it in while you still can, girl. I know, I know. You're going to be a horrific pregnant person. What do you mean? God willing. Jack, your whole personality is like brunch day drinking. Oh, I know.

Crop tops. I mean, the crop tops will be hot. I hope that I'm wrong because a lot of the time everyone's wrong about all these. You can't predict. But the no pooping, like I'm a regular. pooper, but progesterone spikes in your first trimester, and you are the most constipated. I don't know what I'm going to do.

A hell that I... Can you get pregnant and also get a... Enema? No, not the enema, the one where you go with the machine and they suck it out. No. A cawotic? No. I wouldn't even do that now.

No. Absolutely not. But in enema, this was, you know what? This was before you guys introduced me. to an enema. So had I had done that. I don't have the enema. My poop is stuck at the top of my stomach. No, it'll be stuck at the bottom

with this. Really? It'll be waiting for the doors to open and the doors just won't open. I just had a follow-up appointment with my naturopath to try to figure out my CBO stuff. Now I'm like, I haven't even figured out the things that are ailing my body now that I'm just going to go into pregnancy just with like all this shit

going on. So it's like whatever. But I'm like, that's my biggest fear. right now is I'm going to have to stop taking my constipation meds and my and my sleeping meds. Are you going to get your hair really blonde before you get pregnant? Because you also can't dye your hair. I think we need our highlights done. No, I don't dye my hair. Oh, I think maybe I'll do a little highlight before, but then that's it. But I think you can do it now. I think you can color your hair like later after the first trimester. I don't need to. But I am wondering things like, and if anybody's listening, like, I'm like, what do I need to do beauty-wise before? Obviously, I'm going to get Botox done right before.

Maybe another microneedling. I should probably get my vagina waxed, or not waxed, lazered. But I'm like, the things that I can't do. I need some wrecks. This is great. Can someone send us a list? Thank you so much. Yeah, that's a good idea. We'll come back.

We're going to tell you the things you can't do anymore in life because it's not 1999. There's so many things you need to buy and think about when you have a baby, including car seats. So if you're in the market like me, let me tell you about our friends at Nuna. They're engineered to exceed federal safety standards with rigorous crash testing built into every stroller in car seat. We love Nuna. Since Ford was born almost five years ago, we've had a Nuna Stroller in car seat. We recently switched to the Nuna Rev Max car seat, the one that rotates. It has been a complete game changer. All you moms out there, you know how difficult it can

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Everywhere I go, someone says, as you age, you know, you need to eat more protein, but as we all know, I love to have four drinks at all times. Sometimes it's hard to get enough protein and also finding the right protein powder is very tough. A lot of them are very chalky and disgusting. And that is why we're excited to tell you about Clean Simple Eats, a protein powder that we love. And by the way, they have the best protein water, which makes it even easier to get your protein and the flavor is delicious. Kelty's Mini Bridge is stocked. Clean Simple Eats. Taste great, super clean. High quality, highly effective. Clean Simple Eats uses grass. fed weigh protein isolate. And the body can actually utilize all 20 grams of protein in every

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ingredients that leave your skin looking better long after taking your makeup off. Right now, Merit Beauty is offering our listeners their signature makeup bag, which if you've seen it, it's not just a makeup bag, but really an accessory. Free with your first order at Meritbeauty.com. That's M-E-R-I-T beauty.com. Meritbeauty.com. You're listening to the Lady Gang. All right, we're back. I came across a hilarious list of things that we used to do in the early aughts that we can no longer do and I really want to discuss them with you guys because this is wild and I the first one is smoking sections in restaurants. Do you remember? You guys, I worked at this place called Joey Tomatoes and it was a giant barn essentially like a massive high winged barn and all they had

between the smoking section was just like a panel of wine bottles. Yeah. Well, they used to have smoking sections on airplanes. Which is just one small tube. Restaurant smell like smoke and we just didn't notice it? Yeah, I think it's all relative because like I remember if we would be sitting too close to the smoking section, my dad would ask for a table further away from the smoking section. But it had to have been, it was just less strong on the far end of this restaurant. But it is wild. We must have all smelled like smoke and didn't know. Well, that's the thing.

I bet everybody everywhere all of the time just kind of smell like smoke. Like our whole nasal labial folds were off kilter, right? Yeah. Yes. It's weird. That's so disgusting to think about. Disgusting. But also it was a nice thing to like, I mean, if you were a smoker, which I wasn't,

like, what a beautiful gift to be able to go inside in the wintertime and enjoy a steak and a smoke in like a nice place. Now you're shunned out to the outside, freeze and food. cold night night. Mm-hmm. God. That's it. Wow. Okay.

The whole family shared one computer. Yeah. Those were the days. In the living room? Yeah. Oh, we had ours in the living room. Did you have the bubble Mac or was it like the brown early Mac? No, we had like PCs up until I got laptops.

Same. Yeah. Wow. And then you'd have to like wait to dial up onto AOL. Yeah. Then you'd sign on. then I go in a chat room and talk to really God knows who back in the day. I remember a guy, my mom found one of our chats and this kid from my element,

or I guess I was in middle school at that time, he told me he was going to slit my throat. And so my mom had to, like, call his mom and, you know, have a whole thing. I mean, he has since died of a drug overdose. So he was clearly a very troubled person. So sending all the love, you know. I was like he would definitely have been expelled if that happened now. Yeah. Yeah.

Something happened to me in my marriage, my first marriage, where I was trying to exit. We shared a home computer so that it must be in 2002. We had a computer, but we also had cell phones. Hmm. I don't know how it happened, but I remember that I met someone on the train and like a hot guy, and I got his number. It's probably really bad to admit. I got their number and then they were like texting me and I was texting back. It wasn't anything, you know, and it was just a whatever.

Probably a small admission, you know, and it had shown up on the home computer. Oh, no. I don't remember. Wait, that's so weird. Your shit was synced back in the day? I know. That's why I can never remember what happened. But yeah, it was somehow.

AIM maybe. Maybe is the AIM messenger on the early sidekick? Before we had clouds? I don't know. Anyway, okay. Next, phone cords. Do you remember when you were a teen? And first of all, you would have to call your friend's house and say, hi, Mr. Tobin, is Becca there?

Mm-hmm. It's crazy. And you'd be like, yeah, hold on. It's really some, I heard somebody talk about how kids now, like, don't know how to speak to adults and they don't have to. Like, they can go through their whole lives, like ordering food through an app. Oh, that's true. Doing everything through an app and you're not really having to interact. And I do remember having to sort of overcome my.

anxiety about speaking to the parent or the adult that I had to inevitably talk to when they answered the phone. Like, we're tougher than the generation who didn't have to do that because that sucked to be like, hi, hi you miss McVeigh, this is Becca Tobin. Is Sean there? And you like really hope it's like the dad that doesn't answer. And sometimes it is the dad, scary dads. Or, and then it's me and a boy calls the house. And then my dad hangs it down and goes, Kelty, there's a boy on the phone. And you're like, bah. I'm going to just go crawl the hole and die. Just die. And you're like, it's bad enough that you have parents. I mean, everyone had them, but you're somehow embarrassed of them. But then do you remember

like the stretching of the phone cord? It's like, I remember Radio Shack having like the wireless phone for the first time and you were like, you mean I can go in the other room? Yeah, cordless phone. Yeah, cordless phone. But like, you remember like you'd pick up the phone? and then you'd like try to like jangle around the corner so you could like talk in privacy. Yeah, yeah. Just when we, we had a lot of cordless phones at the house. Of course you did because you're rich. But you would take it off of it to like base or whatever.

And then every five seconds, somebody would be like screaming at you like, where's the phone? Like put the phone back on. Like my sister would have it in a room under recover somewhere and the phone would ring. And then like you wouldn't be able to find it. It was so dramatic. Oh, those were the days. I was going to say, I think that they are making phones now, like landline phones, that you can only call a certain amount of people for kids.

And I'm like, that's a cute idea. Oh, is that what it's called? Yes, my niece and nephew have it. And Ford just begged me for it because we were in Atlanta and he was in their bedrooms. And it's the cutest thing. It's obviously to the Wi-Fi, but it literally looks like a phone and you program it like you're saying to the numbers. There are only a few numbers. So my nephew has one and Ford is begging to get a tin phone.

tin can so he can call my nephew's bedroom. That's cute. Wait, that's adorable. I love it. The other thing I was going to say with the phone is, when I was in high school, for whatever reason, my brother had moved out and my parents had gotten him a phone line. It was such a big deal. I got to take the phone line and I had my own phone number in my room and I had an

answering machine. Not that anyone was calling, but it would be like, hey, Kelsey, it's Kevin. Just seeing if you're home, guess you're not. Talk to you to school tomorrow. Hot. I can't believe you got your own landline phone number. I know. That was what the real rich kids had where I was growing up.

Really? Yeah, they had the kids' number, like the kids' landline and the adult landline. Oh, incredible. Okay, another thing on this list was you made plans and hoped everyone showed up. Like, I don't even, like, how did we do anything back in the day? How? How did we make those plans? How did we find the people that we were supposed to find?

By the time I was in college, though, everyone had cell phones. So I didn't experience this other than being in school under my parents' roof. No, I'm talking, hey, we're all going to meet at the movie theater or we're all going to go to the Edmonton Elks game. Yeah. And like, see you there and you're just like, there's 40,000 people here. And then like also your parents are like, okay, after the movie, I'll pick you up at 10. And then you just spent the whole night being like, okay, my parents are coming at 10. You're checking your watch.

because you had to be standing on the curb to get picked up. There was no like, you ready to pick me up? Also, the other way, when you were in an emergency situation and you're like, I got to get the fuck out of here, there was no way to get up. There was no texting your parents being like, hey, I'm in a bad sitch. You just had to run.

You literally had to run and hope that you had a quarter that you could find a pay phone somewhere. Someone was just talking about, God, it was it a comedian or whatever. I don't know if paramedalas. I can't remember anything. But I thought it was so funny. His phone had died and he was going to meet a friend at a restaurant. And he said that every couple minutes, he kept going to text the friend updates on

like, hey, just left the house or finding or parking, whatever. And he said, and in that, I realized like how stupid it is that we send those types of texts right now. Like, we don't need to do this. Like, they don't need to know my every single move. No, on the way, parking. Like, it's walking in. It's like, okay, I'm in the back booth on the left. I know. But the walking in is like so nice because I have like the anxiety of like I'm going to be the first to arrive and I'm just sit by myself and people I'm going to look at people and be like a loser. So I'm always like walking in so that they know to look for me and come save me. I mean I know why we do it. Okay. Before we had Google and even chat, we had to look things up in an encyclopedia. That's so crazy to me. That is so crazy to me.

You just had a giant 16 volume heavy ass books and you were like, I need to do a rapport. on the solar system. Let me get out S. And then you look up solar system. And then it's like, by the time they like to get an updated version, you have to replace the whole entire encyclopedia. And then how much information are you really getting on Saturn? You know? Well, then you got to get out the other one. S. You got to go look to Saturn. And then, you know, when Mars, you got to get the M and look at Mars. See also. This is when it was so nice when the information was limited. We need to go back to limited information. We have too much.

Yeah, but then you were like only as smart as your parents were. So there's a lot of idiots. You know what I'm saying? It's like if you're sitting around the dinner table and you're only to be like, hey, what language do they speak in Portugal? Or like, you know what I mean? And if your parents are a f***ing idiot, you just never find that information out.

I know. But now you know that we are officially the smartest generation and everybody else is just getting stupider after us. So we had it the best. We had just enough information. No 100%. Oh, I just saw something about AI and children. There's like a way to teach AI where it actually makes you smarter.

And then there's a way that's making them dumber. So I think we are in this really important time where they're going to be able to know what access kids need to AI and in order to make them smarter and not dumber. Oh, God. I think it makes you smarter by if I want to learn about a topic, it really does break it down for me so that it really is digestible. It's almost like the cliff's notes, but the important whatever. And then the people that are stupid don't want to see any of that.

They just ask what the answer to the thing is. But you're not going to comprehend it. You're just going to. Researching definitely makes you remember things more when you're like actually out there researching and writing stuff down. The problem with like copying, pasting is like you're not going to comprehend or remember anything. No.

But here we are. Do you remember the phone book? Once a year. This is like my identity getting stolen on meta, nightmare.com. Once a year, a giant book arrived and it had every single person's phone number, their address, their first and last name. That is so crazy to think about. Just all of your information, your social security number.

But now it's on the internet. That's true. Now you get even more on the internet. That's true. I guess, but like not everyone's address in your town is like readily available. I guess it is. I think it is. I think that if you buy your house or,

Yeah, I think it's all, those websites are pretty creepy. They can tell you everywhere you've ever lived. Oh, you can find anything about anybody if you search hard enough. Yeah, I don't like it. I guess you're right. It is just kind of weird, though. Like anyone had your phone number. What did celebrities?

We never put ours in. You did? I remember, no. I remember my family never put it in. Because also, yeah, I remember they, they, well, my parents were both attorneys and they're like, we're never going to put our, and we don't need people coming to the house. That's like such a weird. privacy thing, like as far as for legal, whatever.

I mean, you could say that about any profession, but I think specifically because they're, I don't know, they were like, no. Yeah. So what that was kind of annoying, though, because I need, and we also had the blocked number, the private number, like the perma private number. Oh, you were rich.

No, we were just, my dad was paranoid. He had a stalker from his childhood who kept calling his office and telling my mom that he had witnessed, my dad in a meeting with all that, like the Illuminati. My dad's in the Illuminati with Ted Turner. And he went to a convention in a hotel in Atlanta and he walked onto the roof and he saw my dad and Ted Turner murdering. Are you kidding me? I can't believe it's 10 years and you've only just let me know this about Tom Taylor. Are you joking? No, every year, multiple times you're like even the receptionist at his office because like that always had to be public. So this guy, and I think maybe

part of why they never had our information about our house or our phone number, like home phone was because of this guy. But for years and years, he was like famous. And everyone in my dad's office would know, sometimes he'd call my mom and he'd be like, you need to know the truth about Tom. This is insane. I need to know more about what he saw. The truth about Tom. I mean, it's so wild. I've tried to get so much more information, but like, they're like, I don't, they're so desensitized because it continued to happen over and over. I'm like, this is wild. And also I should have been scared as a child because that guy sounds obviously crazy.

Oh, yeah. That, yeah. Wow, that is. He grew up on the same street as my dad as a child. That's weird to have a male-on-mail stalker that isn't like trying to do something sexual. Yeah. I mean, maybe he was just like hated my dad and really wanted to make his life miserable. Yeah.

Speaking of male-on-male stalker, Jack, did you watch DTF St. Louis? I don't know what any of that means. TV? What's a show? Down to Fick. It's down to fuck. The show's called DTF St. Louis. You should watch it. You will love it. It's like a true crime. Oh. No, it's a scripted limited series with Jason Bateman. It's nominated for a lot of Emmys. I just watch something. And normally, you know, I only watch two of everything in my studying, but it was so good. I watched all eight one day. Wow. Okay. A good little. DTF. I feel like we need a better name for a true crime show. Doesn't really. No, it's about these two guys that are unhappy in their marriage. And one of the.

the guys is like, I heard about this app called DTF St. Louis where if you just, you want to stay with your wife, you don't want to divorce, but you just want to go and find people to and then they get in. It's Ashley Madison. Okay. It's Ashley Madison, yeah. Yeah. All right. Anyway, okay, on that note, speaking of apps, there's an app named Facebook. And on Facebook on September 29th, we're throwing a virtual pajama party for you and me and our sex drive. See, look at that segue. With Cindy, who created the pill Addie, which is the female Viagra, and she is a doc called The Pink Pill. And it is her story about creating this and why no one cares about women and our sex drives

and our vaginas and all of it. And it's the first time we've ever done something where we're doing sort of a live podcast with you guys, where the first hundred people that sign up at RSVP on the ladygang. You get to come in the room. So we'll be able to be like, oh, look, it's Morgan. Morgan wants to raise her hand. And you'll be able to come in and ask a question. You have to RSUP for those 100 spots.

The first 100 people get a sleep mask mailed to them. And then everyone else, if it's full, you can watch on Facebook Live. And Jack and Beck are going to be in the comments because I'll be moderating. And they'll be bringing like your Facebook comments to their conversation. So we're really excited about it. And you can RSVP now at the ladygang.com and just click on the pink pill. Woo-hoo. On that note, we will.

See next to Tuesday. Lady Gang is hosted and produced by Kelty Night, Becoteoven, and Jack Vanek. with social media support from Collie Carrera, audio and video editing from Jared Monaco, and additional support from Steve Delameter and podcast one. Lady Gang, it's Kelty. I would love to see you on my book tour this fall. It's going to be a really cool, intimate chat.

I'm going to do celebrity moderators, music in some cities. I'm going to do a little self-help talk, and then we're going to do a personal emotive writing session. I just think it's going to be really special. If you've come to a lady gang show before, it's probably going to be a little less chaotic, a little more like,

getting yourself together before the new year. Tickets are 35 bucks, and they include a signed copy of my new book, The FM Theory. I'm hitting Atlanta, Washington, Boston, Philadelphia, Chicago, New York City, Toronto, Canada, Seattle, San Francisco, Los Angeles, Austin, and Dallas. And I would love to see you. Tickets are available now at FemBook.com. It's 35 bucks. Come out and see me for the night. It would really mean a lot to me to see some of my lady gang girls there. FMbook.com and I'll see you there, lady gang.