LadyGang - Colons, Crafts and Chaos

Episode Date: September 16, 2025

On this week’s episode of LadyGang, Jac overshares (in the most horrifyingly hilarious way) about her recent colonoscopy experience and why she may never eat Jell-O the same again. Meanwhile, Becca takes little Ford on his first big adventure to the craft store—and lives to tell the tale of glitter explosions, aisle tantrums, and the true cost of googly eyes. And in breaking news, Keltie has… a new friend! But will the gang approve, or is this relationship destined for the group chat roast?We have deals for YOU!!Willie's: Try Willie Nelson's THC Infused Social Tonic! Order at DrinkWillies.com and use code LG for 20% off of your first order! PLUS free shipping on orders over $95!Nutrafol: Got thinning hair? Get $10 off your first month’s subscription and free shipping at to Nutrafol.com and use code LGPODOllie: Your pet needs good food! Visit Ollie.com/ladygang for 60% off your first box of meals! #ToKnowThemIsToLoveThemBoll & Branch: Need fresh sheets? Get 15% off plus free shipping on your first set at BollAndBranch.com/ladygangLadyGang is sponsored by BetterHelp! Get 10% off your first month at BetterHelp.com/ladygangMacys: Get 50 to 75% off at Macy's Suit Sale from September 4th to the 23rd! Shop at Macys.com OR in store!Apretude: Prevent HIV! Talk to your doctor and learn more at Apretude.com or call 1-888-240-0340See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Well, what is this? Welcome to the Lady Gang. That's amazing. Say that again. The Lady Gang. Things are about to change around here. Each week, we catch up with Hollywood's hottest girl posse, Kelty Knight, Becca Tobin, and Jack Vanek.

Hello, hello, hello. Welcome to the Lady Gang. I am Becca Tobin. I am Kelty Knight and Jack Vanek. Oh, I feel like you usually say my name first. I was looking at Kelty on the screen. do you look like you're very um zenned out over there kelty which is shocking i know meditate absolutely not um i am so happy to be here oh okay i slept last night like that

seemed like you were really restraining yourself no what you wanted to really say i slept last night, not through the full night, but I slept probably more last night than I've slept in a year. And, um, it's because, well, I got to talk about it. I just talked about it. Um, Chris got me this thing. It's so insane. This is how desperate he is for me to be happy. It's called eight sleep. It's like, um, it's a pad that you put on your mattress. Once I talk about this, you guys are going to get served all the ads. No. Well, cause you talked about something else that he got you some kind of like a mask or like headphones or something yeah no not that i was worried we were back at that this is a whole it's expensive it's like a cooling mat and it has water

in it and you sleep on it and it automatically heats or cools the bed depending on your optimal sleep thing and then it it is like a smart bed so instead of having an aura ring tell you all about your sleep in the bed tells you it's crazy. So, but what's crazy is that now we're two weeks before lady world. I have stopped having stress dreams about logistical things like tickets, food, like planes, beach, weather. Now, now I am being, I'm having dreams about our performance. so yesterday I it was like as if we were at a circus fair and we're performing but the stair there were stairs on the back of the stage were really steep and that's where we went to the dressing room but everyone had I don't know why we all had like ridiculous costumes but I forgot

mine at home and then we were trying to peel it together sometimes have ridiculous costumes that's true we're trying to piece me up together and you're like you can wear this and Becca was like trying to convince me to wear silver hot shorts, a silver top with black fishnets and those healed Isabel Marant sneakers. And she's like, no, it's cool. It's cool. And then sabotage. Yeah. And then it, we were, we were on stage performing and everyone just was getting up and just walking out. Oh my God. Well, you never know. I know it's like mentally preparing. Anyway, how are you guys oh that was lovely i mean my my stress streams are never ending so me too usually someone's dying so yeah um speaking of heating and cooling this is a real weird tangent

but it's so strange i was having a conversation with my neighbor yesterday and she'd always told me that she had these weird um premonitions as a kid like she knew things about her great grandmother that she never met that like she should not have known. Like she, she's very much one of those people. And she told me yesterday, speaking of cold and being cold that anytime she gets really, really cold and freezing cold, she knows something bad is going to happen. Oh, she said it all started as a young child. And then on the way to high school, one day, her sister was driving. They drove to school together every day. And her sister drove them. She said her dad remembers her and she remembers this bundling up. It's the middle of august in texas

She's bundled up and she's so cold and she's like I don't want to get in the car with britney her sister And the dad's like why get in the car go to school. This is what you do every day She's like I don't want to go like I just have anxiety. Can I stay home a little longer? Her sister got in an accident and totaled her car that day. No my god that's so weird the coldness isn't that weird like I'm such a skeptic with this type of thing you know like I don't think psychics could be psychic anymore because of the internet so I when I hear about three days to ruminate on your name yeah I just need your name your

and your phone number which basically you could find everything out about everybody on the internet now um but how crazy so now i'm paying attention when i get extremely cold if a bad thing happens next oh my god what about me who's always cold because of my anemia no it doesn't count i think it's like you have a normal body regulation yeah or if you're in a extremely hot place like texas in the summer and you're like really cold yeah wow that's crazy isn't that wild Yeah. So much to worry about. I know. I know. All right. Well, it's time for good week. Yes, it is bad week. Oh no. I'm going to start because it is spooky season, right? Oh, your favorite. Oh my God. Becca, I thought about you the other day because I bought some tombstones.

hates the tombstone by the way i was in michael's yesterday wait me too oh my god literally i was in we have to discuss okay go on okay and that's why i got my tombstones the halloween decor is already 40 off it's oh i know i know it's amazing it's always thrown out a deal okay so okay so for rain at Michael's. Okay. Wait. Okay. Let me just back to the tombstone. Okay. I'm with, I I'm with a friend and, and Ford shopping through Michael or this, we went to Lowe's first. Cause Lowe's has like a lot of stuff too. Who knew? Oh. And my friend was like, Oh, look at these tombstones are like, cool. They're the, whatever you put them in the yard. And like, they're really like inexpensive, whatever. And I looked at her and I go, here's exactly why I hate Halloween.

We have someone in our family actively dying and we're going to put a tombstone in our yard. Right. You know, it's just, it's for the people with charmed lives, you know, tombstones are for people with everybody healthy in their lives and their families and haven't experienced any tragedy who don't visit a tombstone once a year. You know, it's like not to make anybody feel badly, but everyone comes for me so hard with like my reasons for hating certain things. That feels pretty valid. No, that's valid. I think it's incredibly valid. The, the amount of passion i feel over sydney sweeney acting like a ballerina in a shoe commercial yes it's very high

and so i and that's just because i was a ballerina and i'm offended because your turnouts suck sydney so i can imagine as someone who's had people die and then also is currently you know pre-mourning in imminent grieving grief yeah uh i i feel like your tombstone life eliminate the tombstones well the tombstones all return my tombstones no you don't have to jack i don't want to she's not coming to your house anyway triggering a lot of neighbors i'm sure well the good thing about my house is we're like we don't really have an outward facing front lawn because we have trees covering everything right i have a question yeah are they funny tombstones yeah it's like no i was saying that meanly like it's not even better it's like just put a real tombstone the

ones that are like here lies craggly man like you know the ones that have like a pun no it's like it's um anita doctor that was yes no i hate that more remember my neighbor who had the tombstone that said i told you i was dying well that's that is too much that's not funny we were better off just putting the real dates and names of our loved ones who have passed because then at least we be comforted that maybe if spirits come back at halloween we could invite the people we love back let's day of the dead it you know what i mean exactly and anita like that should be what it is but it's like i need a doctor is anita like a n i t a it's not funny i know i know well that's more funny than i told you i was dying yeah it is because that's like so dark i mean how many

Okay. So I, that wasn't even part of my good week, bad week. However, the shopping for Halloween was, so we went to Michael's, we did, we hit Lowe's and then we hit Michael's and obviously they're a sponsor of the lady gang, um, lady world, forgot the name of it already of lady world and Jack's painting classes. So I was like, I'm going to go support the cause. I hadn't really checked out the Michaels near my house. And it is a, it is a wonderland. my son picked out this is my good week mom i love this tombstone and you're like i wish i could show you i wish this was visual i was like because everything is so inexpensive and i was in just a good mood you know i was like go for it i don't care what the

you pick out because honestly what you picked out at lowe's was the most hideous doormat i've ever seen in my life and i bought it for you okay so nothing you find here is going to be as offensive as the doormat that I'm going to have to put out on my front door on October 1st. So he picked out a hot pink sparkly pumpkin, a white sparkle ghost, a ceramic pumpkin that lights up that he is now using as his nightlight. So there are pumpkin shapes all over his bedroom. Oh, I love it. That's so cute. He's festive.

And worst of all. He's your worst nightmare. Yeah. Worst of all, when we were at Lowe's, he picked out the most giant inflatable spider you have ever seen for our front yard. Oh, you're an inflatable family. I'm an inflatable family. Oh, no.

Listen, I understand the inflatables now as a homeowner because how, you guys, I thought so much. I have nowhere to store. I just got these like five foot ghosts from a pottery barn. They don't get compacted. Like they're just five feet. And I'm like, where am I storing this?

So I like, I understand the inflatables. Are you putting up your giant skelly this year? Yes. The week when we come back from lady world, it's spooky season. Like we're waiting until then. No,

I was, I, I knew that you were going to say that Becca, because we went this weekend to shop for Halloween stuff and they have that whole pink section and it's so cute. like it's so cute like i knew it he tried to buy for it as a show girl i love it i love it so much you're so true next he's gonna want a christmas tree he tried to buy halloween ornaments i'm like do people have halloween trees in their houses

well they have halloween wreaths yeah i drew the line when he picked up michael's god bless you they have you know when you're making you know your your soup holder when you're cooking it's like the ceramic soup, the, the spoon holder, sorry, the spoon holder to not put it on your counter and make a mess or whatever. He picked out a Halloween spoon holder. Yeah. I love it. And I was like, this is where I draw the line. We cannot have interchangeable kitchen items for the preferred, like what we're, we're celebrating. I just bought a whole Halloween plate set from HomeGoods. It's so good. Oh, I got a plate for him. I got a plate for him. And a skeleton nutcracker. For all those nuts he's enjoying. You can barely get this child

to eat a broccoli. Oh my God. He's going to be like, mom, I need my walnuts cracked by the open fire. And I'll be like, you can have as many nutcrackers as you want if you actually eat the nuts you're cracking, you know? Yeah, exactly. I forgot that nutcrackers had a purpose. yeah they do so that is actually it was adorable it was quite cute and i loved his excitement um so it's spooky season um i'll say i'll take pictures what's he going as for halloween do you have an idea yet he reese most recently he said a pirate so cute and then he said spider-man but I also have the kid that like really he picks out all these costumes and then he doesn't want to wear anything on Halloween I know you gotta be like guess what you're doing my mom would be like

guess what you're being a piece of black licorice and you just wear a black turtleneck and black leggings yeah this is great wow wow that is sad wait what well you know in Canada everything's backwards. You can't buy a costume. You have to make it. If you buy a costume, your parents don't love you. But like making a licorice costume doesn't seem like a... Well, that's why it was low thing. But my mom made me like incredible costumes growing up. Incredible. Like, oh my God. Well, she's a gifted seamstress. Yeah. I would have been up Schitt's Creek without a paddle there. Yeah. It was amazing. Okay. So the other thing, I'm so sorry. I think the parents will really appreciate this. We were in Atlanta visiting family and my niece is in high school.

She's the funniest, wittiest person ever. She's just one of those people. Like everybody in Zach's family just has whatever that gene is. And there's a show on Netflix called Masha and the Bear. And it's this little Russian girl named Masha and a bear. And they get into like mischief, like actually bad things, like lighting shit on fire. It's a bizarre, bizarre show. And she looked at me and she goes i know what ford should be for halloween he should be masha and zach should be the bear because look at what masha looks like you guys is that not ford martin oh my god wait like big eyes like an animate that looks like him it does big giant eyes blonde hair i mean tell me that's not ford martin that is oh my god that's so cute anyways okay so my bad week is something

that you're looking at currently? I have filler face. Oh no. I haven't gotten filler in so long. What are you doing? I wasn't sure what was going on. Did you just get it done? Not super recently, but I... Pre or post weakest link? Pre. Oh, so it's been a while. Yeah. Why did I look different on weakest link than I do now. Well, you looked, well, you looked gorgeous on weakest link right now. I'm doing my makeup. You're a Canadian for right now. You know what I mean? 8am on a Tuesday recording lady gang. Yeah, I know. So I listen, I, you know, I like to go back and forth on my own advice, right? This is something I acknowledge all the time. I was like, we're not doing filler anymore. But then I just started looking in the mirror. I was so gaunt. I was so like caved in.

I was so whatever. And I'm like, it's too early for the facelift and I don't know any other way to like fill out my face more. So I did it and it, it was fine. I did, she did a little bit on like the perimeter of my face to sort of like give me some lift. Right. And it looked good at first, but like we all know filler moves. It migrates, it migrates and I'm having falling down. It's falling down. And now my jowls are worse than ever. No, I can't understand how to get rid of this because the filler has gone down like, I don't think it's gone down that much. Well, it's gone down a lot. And so I'm like, there's a woman in Austin who does ultrasound dissolving where she uses an ultrasound machine to see where the filler is. And that's where she puts the

dissolver. Oh, so I'm considering it, but I don't know. I don't, I know. So, okay. I'll tell you this. Uh, I don't have an answer for you. I'm sorry. You look great, but I hear you. I also felt a little gaunty and I had the facelift. So I'm like, I don't know what the I'm going to do about this gel. I can't go back to Dr. Diamond. He's going to be like, you are going to an institution. But you know what I did? I actually, there's a place here in LA. I wonder if there's one in Austin. This one's called Kosha. Oh, the massage place. Yes. And you know what? I went and I spent the money, it's expensive, for an 80-minute ultimate only facial plasma lymphatic drainage massage on the face. And they do all the gua sha,

but like they go in your mouth. They go in your ear. She's in your head. And then she gave me this roller that has like spikes on it. And I've been using it. Um, anyway, listen, it falls again. Like it's going to fall again. There's no, there's no forever, but I will tell you that I definitely felt like better about it. Yeah. So I think maybe before you go into like injecting another thing in your face, you're tired. You're going through a lot. There's a lot on your family side. There's a lot in Lady Gang. Like you're just – this is not your like – you're not renewing when you're sleeping. You're not your best.

Like there's just a lot of heaviness in your life at the moment. So I think maybe before you go serious like needles and stuff more in your face, maybe just go and see if you can find someone to like just really do that face yoga on you and just have it for a month and get through everything and then think about it. Yeah. Yeah. I do have that zip, the zip halo mechanism. You just have to use it all the time. That's the thing. Who has time to use one of those every day? I know. It's only four minutes. I know that I can do it. Put it in your car. Well, you have to use the conductor gel. So I want to immediately wash my face after. I don't know. This is like the dumbest first world problems, but that does help

for sure like it definitely does a little lift because it like it gets the muscles going it's like a tens unit kind of yes um so that is nice but i might be visiting dr diamond in the next couple come on down here no we have to get our facelifts together but jack you're so far from having needing a facelift you're really far decades away i'm like seconds i'm like holiday seasons away. She's spooky season away. I'm like one spooky season away from needing to lift this jowl off my face. It's also like, this is so long. I'm so sorry. Just don't have anywhere else to talk about this. It's also, you know, I got tricked when you have a baby face as a young person and you have like fat face, everybody tells you, you're going to age beautifully.

because all the fat you have in your face the collagen no it just starts to weigh down it's just a different type of aging so anyway well godspeed thank you now back to the lady gang um i'll go next so jack's like we're gonna move on even jack jack's like kelty is not taking the reins of this episode the way she's meant to let me let the conversation was over it was over it was over i'm not gonna butt in i'm bugging you jack okay so my good week is i finally went and saw a gi doctor that took me seriously and you got the colonoscopy and i got the colonoscopy tell us everything i'm dying to know okay so the good week part of it is i got it done he didn't end up endoscopy too because i don't know if you guys

know that like i get like food lodged in my esophagus sometimes i think i've talked about it and I've always just been like oh I mean that's just like something that I do you know never really like looking into it and so when I told him he's like uh we're doing an endoscopy too because that's like not normal okay so I did both good news is nothing glaring nothing like scary or spooky um doesn't really solve anything I have some like chronic it says disease but it's just like this like inflammation in my esophagus which is like causing it's like an allergy kind of thing, whatever. So that's the good week. The bad week is my experience was quite traumatizing. I told you it was going to be horrible. No, something happened. So it was regular traumatizing

because anybody that's gotten a colonoscopy knows that the prep is absolutely horrible. It is hell. You can't eat all day. You can only have like clear liquids. So that's horrible for me, number one. And then at like 6 p.m. the night before, you have to start drinking the most disgusting drink that I have ever drank in my life. It's thick and salty and like, but it has lemon lime flavor, but like that makes it worse. You're like, I'd rather you just not flavor it. I'd rather you flavor it shit and just drink the shit. Yeah. Just like close my nose and get it down. And like Jared, I made Jared have like a sip of it. He's like, that's not that bad. I'm like, well, it's not that bad when you like have the first cup of it, but then you have to drink

it every 15 minutes for two hours. And at the end of those first two hours, I literally thought I was well i guess a lot of people take zofran before because like people do throw up doing it and like it was so and then you start shitting your pants and not shitting you start pissing your through your butthole water water and so i'm like i think you know what when you were saying you were gonna do this i was like it's horrible and then becca followed up by being saying something nice because she knew i was being too serious but i was trying to warn you i knew what was gonna be so i knew i know i just leaned into the propofol yeah she's like have a fun propofol nap Um, so that was bad. And then, so by the end of it, Jared's like, he's like, I'm going to go get

Taco Bell. Cause like, he didn't know what to eat by himself. And he's like, is it okay if like, he's like, I'll go eat it in the other room. I'm like, you can eat it in front of me. Like, I literally feel like I'm going to throw up. Like I wasn't even hungry at the end. No, I felt so sick. Okay. Then you have to wake up at 4am the next morning and chug the other half of the liquid for two hours. So then I'm doing that also peeing out of my butthole again. and by the end of it you're so dehydrated like you feel horrible like horrible weak nauseous um headache whatever okay so then we go to the doctor's office my appointment was at 10 and I get there at 9 I'm like I'm starting to feel really bad because I haven't had a sip of

water in forever and like all of my like everything is depleted so they bring me in I'm like you know waiting to be taken back. It's 10. They're like, okay, we got the room ready. Like we're ready to go. Then I'm waiting a little longer. Then it becomes 11, 1115, 1130. And I'm telling you by the second I am feeling worse and worse and worse. Like I think it's the worst I've ever felt in my life. I started getting your worst hangover. I was explaining it to Jared. It's like having the worst hangover of your life. And then also the stomach flu, because I was getting so nauseous and they wouldn't give me any Zofran. I was starting to get so anxious because I'm waiting around so long. And like every, every second feels like an hour. Hours. I couldn't even look

at my phone. I felt so nauseous. Like I was like, I'd sit there and then I'd check my phone. I'm like, it's only been two minutes. Oh my God. So 12, two hours later, they're like, the room's finally ready. And so they like bring me in the room and I'm like getting wheeled in. And I'm like, this is the first time that I've ever like been brought into like a surgery that like, I'm not, I don't have a drug in my system. Like I'm completely sober. And I'm like, this is a little bit like anxiety. Sure. I like it when they put you out and then wheel you in, but I've been in the same suit. They put you on the cold thing and you're like, what the fuck? Like, why am I still awake? Yeah. I'm like, I wish I had like a, an anti-anxiety, like before my, my amectomy, the

guy's like okay i'm injecting something it's gonna feel like you took three tequila shots that's the best and then eat it i'm like oh my god i feel amazing i'm like let's do it so they bring me into the room he puts me over on my side because obviously you have to go up your butt and then they're like okay we're ready to go and i'm like oh the screen's not working so the screen broke no no no and then for another another hour jacqueline i'm laying so cold in sideways freezing on this bed cold and why don't they give you something i kept so first i was like i was like i'm like can you please i'm like i feel so i started getting like you know like when your throat starts getting the gags yes i'm like am i gonna throw up on this table um i'm like

do you have any zofran he's like well we don't want to give it to you and like until right before your surgery so it'll last i'm like oh my god and then i'm like sitting there and i'm like it's like uh, like 1245. I've been there for like 45 minutes in this new room. And I'm like, I'm like, can you please give me some kind of like an anti-anxiety? I'm like, I'm starting to freak out. I'm getting like super panicky. Doesn't give it to me. No. He's like, he's like, you know, same thing. We're going to give you the like anti-anxiety. Like, so you like chill out so we can do, cause you know, they put you in like a twilight like thing. Um, so yeah, I had to wait there for another hour and then they're like they're like yeah oh we're calling it in but we

don't know where he is and i'm like this is insane and he goes you know we you'll we'll get to you today like if i have to wait for another five minutes i don't know what i'm gonna do i started like bawling my eyes out i was like straight up having a panic attack and i'm like can you bring me into the back into the waiting room like i i can't do i started freaking out about everything I'm like, what if the, what if the anesthesia doesn't work? Cause like, yeah, you know, like when you really think about it, I'm like, oh my God, they're like literally going to stick a tube. Cause I like disassociate with like medical stuff and surgery. Cause I'm like, just don't think about it. Don't think about what they do. And like, I'll be fine. So I just,

I was sitting there. I'm like, all I'm doing is spiraling about what's going to happen. And I'm like thinking that anesthesia is not going to work. So it was traumatizing. I hope you left a nasty yelp review no i mean you should gonna do it wasn't their fault i mean the they the person before me probably had some kind of like complications or something but they shouldn't have left you on the table that long they should be putting a blanket on you or that they put a blanket on me but like i'm already like shaking and like spiraling um and then like you know like I don't Kelty did you wake up at all in the middle of yours like do you remember anything I like have a flash of me being like ow that hurts no this happened to me under twilight

really yes and that's why I will never do twilight again yeah I don't think I want to I felt everything strange oh you felt everything I felt the I felt almost yeah I felt everything like in a dull way and then I felt like a sharp pain and then I I literally said ow yes that's how I but I mine like literally is like a flash it's like what most of my memories are it's like a screenshot but I'm like I remember being like that hurts so like that was crazy um I can't like they found nothing they found like they found a paw up and took a paw about I'm not great I was like swallowing water um and then they found some other stuff the esophagus thing was the main thing that they found um but it's not like what's the solution you're supposed to do like a

round of like medicine for it for like three months to it's like there's like extra white blood cells like in my esophagus and it like irritates stuff huh it's called esophageal i don't know what it was but nothing glaring or anything that's like um leaning towards what my symptoms are but yeah my gi doctor he's like great and he's like we'll do all the things so i'm doing like a swallow test like where they you do the pill and you see how long it takes to go down um and like an x-ray and stuff we'll see sometimes you don't you never find anything so well i'm glad you're not dying well it's good for my health anxiety i'm like that was like good I'm glad there's not like they didn't find something in there.

You're like, okay, well, I'm just normal constipated, not constipated because there's a giant tumor in there, you know? Yeah. Well, I still have all of my scar tissue stuff going on, but like nobody's taking seriously. But that's for another day, you know? I have a friend who has like a tilted colon. Oh. I wonder if they're able to – I'm sure they would have been able to see that. I feel like they would have, yeah.

But yeah, it gets stuck so she can't poop. Oh. she does a daily like stool softener to like I mean not that it helps that much but just to get the poo moving if she can you know I take my Chinese herbs every day the guy I guess there's like a part of my colon that was like dark and he's like do you take laxatives he's like because that's like a sign of you like taking laxatives I was like well I take these Chinese herbs he's like that's why that's a laxative wow I'm like did you ask him if you can take it every day i mean i told him i take it every day okay i was gonna say maybe he had maybe he had some

insight there i mean listen it's definitely not good because now i'm reliant on them but yeah whatever i guess it's better than like a drug yeah or is it i don't know well i don't know i just saw an instagram that the wellness industry herb industry all that is worth five times big up that big pharma's worth now no really like supplements and stuff yeah 6.8 billion dollars and big pharma is worth like 1.2 billion so well i'm getting none of that money so i would like an endorsement deal from someone i'll do what i want big pharma money i love sky call me up about to inject myself today well i just got prescribed linzess which um is oh i've heard of this yeah well it's uh it's a lock well it's like it's for a certain type of constipation

but like it get that it gets things moving so they're out there keep us posted you're listening to the lady gang um okay my bad week is that i um i can never quite get it right you know what i mean like i can never quite be that person that gets it together it's your brand I know, but I'm constantly trying to reinvent into like I have it together and it never quite goes. So yesterday I had a very important meeting with my new boss, who is a really cool guy, and a new executive that I have actually known for a very, very long time. She runs the whole digital like space at E and we actually worked together a zillion years ago when I was on OMG Insider. She worked for Yahoo and so it's kind of cool to like reconnect with her. But this was like everyone's in town, you know, everyone was in town for the Emmys and blah, blah, blah. So I am so – I'm like, okay, we're going to the meeting and I just shit the bed.

Like, I was planning on getting up and, like, putting some mascara on and, like, getting my hair washed. Was it on Zoom? No, it was in person. And I was like, I'm going to come. Like, normally the last time I met these people, right when they canceled the show, I, like, went into hair and makeup early and got into full Kelty drag and then, like, not full drag but, like, a drag version and, like, went over and looking like a superstar because my old mentor was always like, you have to show up the way you want them to see you. like they can't executives can't like be look at a normal regular girl and be like oh she's glamorous like you have to just be that you know you gotta j-low it anyway so I just I mean this is not a good time for me to be trying to build a new career like we're going to Florida you know

what I mean I'm trying to build a gifting I'm trying to build a gifting suite okay I'm trying to build a gifting you don't have the bandwidth to build a new career bandwidth to like come in and be like, I'm barely making it through the last two weeks of e-news. You're not like the Good Morning America PowerPoint. Remember when you had your audition for, was it Good Morning America? Today Show. Yes. And I made like a whole like, this is why I'm the best. Do you remember this? Yeah. Who was telling us that story? No, she did. Oh. She told us, I will never forget. I'm sorry to interrupt your thing. No, please. When we were recording at Podcast One back in the old days, way back. And she had this major, major interview slash audition. She talked about

she was going to wear her power color yellow. She made like an entire unsolicited PowerPoint. How I would change Good Morning America to be more digital and do TikToks and like all that stuff. Literally like Reese Witherspoon on election. No, the show. Oh, election. And the paper was rose scented. Yeah. Yes, yes, yes, yes. Okay. Sorry. So you're not in that mode now. How things have changed. Well, I actually did that for my first meeting with them. I did go in with three new shows I wanted to pitch and what I thought was wrong in the TV landscape, which was hilarious because I made that before they canceled the show. So I was like, here's

how TV and digital can work together. And then I was like, oh, well, TV won't be doing anything because we're canceled. But anyway, so I made a quick change, but I did go in with a duo tang, okay to that meeting. So this is the follow-up meeting. What is a duotang? I've never heard that word before. A duotang? What? A duotang? A duotang? D-U-O-T-A-N-G. Is that a program? A duotang is like a folder that has the three little metal things that open. A binder? That's a binder. That's a binder like this. What about the duotang? It's like a file folder? folder not a file folder it's got the you know the metal things that go up and then go no duotang is a brand name for paper folders made of cardstock paper yeah they're used to

buying multiple sheets of paper by bending embedded grass I've never heard that in my life it's like a Chesterfield it's like a Canadian thing okay okay anyway so this meeting there was no duotang there was no prep I was just like good luck I was literally on a call with you guys and then walked in yeah so but I was like I gotta do something so at first I was like I'm just gonna wear leggings. And I was like, no, Kelty put jeans on. So I felt okay about my outfit, but it was not, I didn't even wear heels guys. I wore jeans, a white tank top and a bra, big deal for me. And I wore these really cute van shoes that my friend, they're like black and white checkered vans, but my friend who's a creative director bedazzled them all. So they're kind of like a

conversation topic. And then I had this red YSL kind of blazer shirt that was cool and some jewelry. And I was just like I went in fresh-faced and I was just I just said to them like i'm going in to eat in an hour Sorry, I don't have a lash on like and i'll make it like a thing, you know, i'll just be like regular girl So I do the whole meeting and it was great. I really like these people I think it's what we're creating is going to be really cool And you know this my new boss. It's a guy he's asking me like what would you do? And then I'm trying to say, listen, I know I am very smart in the world of red carpets. I've been

on so many of them. This is someone asking me, what do you think? And I'm saying to him, I'm feeling so smart because I'm like, well, really, if you think about it, we're actually prepping the E! Live from the Oscars red carpet started last week at TIFF because this is when the Oscar campaign starts and we need to see people all the time and we build. And I'm like, I'm really doing my thing. Get back to my office. What do I see? You know, when you put a bra under a tank top and you don't have breasts, the bra was out of the tank top the whole time. Oh, I thought you were going to say the bra like slipped into your nipples. No, no, no. But like, I just think like a bra strap or any type of a bra showing is just so trashy looking like unless you're at the

club so it's like a nude ugly nude bra because it's a white bodysuit so just like having the ugly nude bra poking out of my tank top the whole time while i'm trying to be like and then at the oscars i will talk to jennifer lopez like i just stars they're just like us i can never get it together. And I just am like, this is why jobs were a turtleneck every day. You know what I mean? I should be in a cat suit from head to toe, just my little eyes peeking out and my stupid mouth and the mouth. When I talk for 10 minutes, it should just constrict it. Have you, speaking of bras hanging out of tank tops, I watched the whole Baldwin reality series that I said moved me to tears.

I know, you loved it, yeah. And congratulations, Elaria, on Dancing with the Stars. She, I urge everyone to watch this show simply to notice she does not wear one single outfit, not out in the world, not in an interview, nothing where a bra is not showing. Really? What?

Yep, they go to couples therapy, couples counseling. And it's like a lacy little bra showing? it's a bra it's always a different version of a bra sometimes it's lacy but there's always a bra bra strap situation and that is everything i'm trying to say about this meeting well i do want to say too in relation to the bras showing that is a very y2k thing so if you're still looking for an outfit for lady world for y2k day have your bra showing out of a like a spaghetti strap sexy little bra you wore it was a cute little no no no no y2k was definitely like the victoria's secret thick strapped brock.

It wasn't nude or white. White is fine. No, I'm not saying this is fine. I'm saying that's a Y2K thing for bras to be sticking out of your shirt. So if anybody's looking for an outfit still, that's your outfit. You know,

I just, I'm never going to get it together. Do you remember the clear straps with the jewels, those bras? That's Y2K too. Uh-huh. Well, Kelsey,

I'm sure you nailed it. You knocked out of the park. The good news is, is that like they've seen you, the whole world has seen you in glamorous clothing thanks to your new camera. So there is so much footage of you, not just on TV, but on the internet of you looking stunning. So you did it for a reason. Thank God you had enough bandwidth to take your little camera everywhere this year, because that will make up for the fact that your nude bra was sticking out. no in person she's garbage but like with a 1999 flash it was incredible um breathtaking my good I have a quick good week so my good week is is that I have a new friend oh yeah I made a friend I made an adult friend um is it Jennifer Tilly yes who's that okay so I went to Rachel Zoe's

birthday party. Cause I know Rachel was a mutual friend. Um, and it was very fun ish. Um, it was fun. They were, yeah, it was filming. They were filming. So like, I've been to a couple of these parties now where they're filming and there are restrictions. Like you can't have real music playing. So you're like at a disco party and what you want to be doing is doing earth, wind and fire and dancing, but you can't have that. So it's like a little bit like being at a party with elevator music um is there any music or no there's music but it's like elevator music and it's low so but anyway i really like rachel and um and then i know her old assistant marissa and i used to work together so i saw her and um i saw the girls from show me your moo moo and they were talking about

you and anyway so that was really really fun and after the party i got a message from jennifer and she was like, Hey, Canadian, um, let's have Jennifer. You need to, so she is a Canadian actress and she's on housewife. She's a friend. She's very funny. Um, Beverly Hills, Beverly Hills, her husband invented the symptoms Simpsons. Oh, wow. Okay. She got a bunch of that money and then he passed away and I think she got, but she's a professional poker player. That's her first job. Oh, that's cool. But she was an actor. She got nominated for an Oscar. She's Canadian. So she grew up three hours from where I grew up. So many of the same, usually when people are like, I'm Canadian, it's Ryan Reynolds. And he's from the East side of Canada, like the Toronto,

which is like the cool side. It's very rare to meet someone in Hollywood who's like a West side Canadian. Like we're just so trashy. I love it. And I mean that with a lot of everyone. Um, but you know, like we're from the prairies, like it's just a different vibe. So anyway, she wrote me and she was like, let's get lunch. And I was like, yeah. And this is what you do. Someone says, let's get lunch. And then you say, yeah. And then you never get lunch until the next time you see each other at an event. And you're like, oh my God, we got to get that lunch. And then you just say, you're going to have lunch for the rest of your life and you never go and have lunch. God bless. And that's what I love. I don't want to leave the house. But then she said,

she's a doer. She's a doer. She's like, great. When are you available? Oh God. Hate it. On the spot. Yeah. And she's like, are you available on Sunday? And I was like, I did the thing. So normally when someone's like, Hey, can you come? Like last night, someone was like, will you come to my dance class? And I was like, yeah, I'll be there. And then an hour before I was like, I won't be there. Like that's so LA, you know? So I was like, Oh, I'm available Sunday thinking, Oh no, we're taking this one step further, but we're not actually going to make it. You know what I mean? This is just like, Oh, I'm not available Sunday. Keep in touch.

let me, you know, she goes, great, great. 1245 at the Ivy. And I was like, Oh, so she made the, she's a doer. So guys, I went on a Sunday. I didn't wear makeup, but I went and I made a new friend on Sunday. And let me tell you something. Jack is right. Brunch is amazing. Brunch is so fun. Wow. Cause she, she actually went once brunch is my new favorite meal. It is so fun. You can order, we had crab legs. We both had healthy salad with a meat on it. Like I had salmon, she had shrimp. And then we had pancakes. Where other meal are you having a little bit of veggie and a pancake with so much syrup? And then my favorite thing about Jennifer is she was like, they brought one little slice of butter, like one palette for our pancakes. And she goes,

we're going to need way more butter. I also love a lot of butter on my pancakes. The bar is low, but. She brought three butters. I love that. So we sat. First of all, I've never been to the Ivy because I don't like to leave the house. It is a very famous restaurant in LA. It's right on Robertson Boulevard.

It's outside. It used to be a very paparazzi hotspot. Not anymore. But it's like got a little white picket fence and they're all, every table has a little vase of like fresh roses and it's just very quaint and like so lovely. And we just sat there and we just talked about Canada and like we ate our pancakes and kiki'd and she wore a cute little outfit and it was so fun. And then that was it.

I really like her on the show. I obviously don't know her in real life. I really like her on Housewives of Beverly Hills. She's very similar. I was hoping you were filming that brunch though. For what? Housewives. Oh, for Housewives.

No. It was just a brunch. friend just being a friend well she's a friend so i don't know they don't have a position that's like friend of a friend well she might have been promoted she might have been promoted this season we don't know yet we don't could be a bane she could be holding the what are the beverly hills girls hold a diamond oh she could be holding a diamond this year no she would she's great on the show but she's just so funny and it was it was really fun because she was like i don't know anything about her so it was like learning about a new person but we have so much in common because

where we're from. And like, I don't know, it was just really nice. So I, you know, you can make a new friend. Like, will we ever see each other again? I have no idea, but she was like, she was like lunches on me. And I was like, okay. And then I wanted to bring her a little something. Cause she was like lunches on me and she made the plans. So I got her one of these, um, the Alex Earl light from Amazon. And I brought it for her because I noticed that in her pictures, she always has nice makeup and jewelry, but her photos are not well lit. And I was like, I'm going to help you. And she was so excited and I showed her how to use it. And it was just really lovely. You're such a good gift giver. Thank you. You really are. That's really sweet. Thank you so

much. So anyway, I just want everyone to know I love brunch. Wow. Wow. I love it. All it took is for her to actually experience it. Yeah. Brunches. And for a filthy rich woman to extend an invitation. Yeah. What I love the most about her story. No, I know that you went because it's, I get it. It's like the Canadian, like it's, you know, similar common ground. It's a bond. It's a special bond. Um, oh, I, I do really enjoy the story of how she act, how she has the money. So when she married the creator of Simpsons, he had not yet, it had not become like the Simpsons, but in their divorce, you know, they're like, okay, well she can get X percent of what this weird show makes and it's, and it's, and you're thinking it's $15. Yeah. You're like, well,

it's going to have two seasons. She'll make like maybe a couple million dollars, whatever. But the fact that it went on to be so successful, it's like, she was like watching money in the stock market. Just shoot through the roof. I know. That's why you always have to divorce attorney. You have to take the stock options if they, it's true. It's true. Yeah. Her attorney was smart. He's like, you know what? We should get a little percentage, a little piece of this. Yeah. That's crazy. She was sweet. And what I like about her as my new friend, Jen, is that she – it's not like – I don't want to say new money, but you know how like when you're with someone and they try to play it off like – okay, here's the thing. when you're like, I love your dress. She's like, thank you. It's super old Dolce. Like she just tells you, you know what I mean? She's not trying to be like, thank you. And like, you have to guess,

you know what I mean? She's going to give you the tea. She's going to tell you about it. Her handbag selection is. And then also I thought this was very nice. So a lot of times, well, okay. You know, I'm not a famous person, but I would love to be a famous person. so after we came down we were getting our cars and um well i i ubered i wasn't gonna show up in my fiat to the ivy with a flat tire by the way um anyway so we're getting the cars and some a fan came up and she was like oh my god i love you can i take a picture with you and she goes well of course but you would also want a picture with my friend kelty here who is uh the host of e-news and of course you recognize her the way she said it was so lovely and i was like you know what

you're like a good person i can tell so i'm i don't know if we're gonna be friends in real life but I had a brunch and I feel like I kind of have a new friend, which is exciting. I'll keep you posted. Wow. I'm proud of you. Okay. On that note,

we weren't here for a long time. We're here for brunch time. Yay. Not the right sign off. See you next Tuesday. No. See you next Tuesday. See you next Tuesday.

Social support from Kali Carrera, editing from Jared Monaco, producing from Steve Delameter, and iconic hosting, creating and being the gang gang of all gangs by Becca Tobin, Jack Vanek, and Kelty Knight. Kelty Night Support by Dara Kaley.

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