LadyGang - Crimes Against Ladies

Episode Date: August 26, 2025

For a special, one-of-a-kind episode, we’re handing the mic to one of YOU. A brave LadyGanger is stepping into the hot seat to share her jaw-dropping, heart-breaking, absolutely movie-level story of lies, deceit, and cheating. 💔🔥 Think: betrayal that will make your jaw hit the floor, secrets that will have you screaming at your car radio, and resilience that will leave you inspired. This isn’t reality TV—it’s real life—and we’re honored she’s trusting the LadyGang to hear it first. Grab your headphones, grab your tissues (and maybe a glass of wine), because this episode is raw, shocking, and unforgettable.👯‍♀️ Because at the end of the day, LadyGang isn’t just a podcast—it’s a sisterhood. And when one of us gets burned, we all feel the fire.Check out our amazing sponsors!!Old Navy: Need summer activewear? Shop in store OR online at OldNavy.comProgressive: Wanna save on car insurance? Visit Progressive.com to see how much you can save!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Please play responsibly. If you have questions or concerns about your gambling or someone close to you, please contact ConnexOntario at 1-866-531-2600 to speak to an advisor free of charge. BetMGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with iGaming Ontario. Well, what is this? Welcome to the Lady Gang. That's amazing. Say that again.

The Lady Gang. Things are about to change around here. Each week, we catch up with Hollywood's hottest girl posse, Kelty Knight, Becca Tobin, and Jack Vanek. Hello, hello, hello. Welcome to Lady Gang Quickie. I am Becca here with Jack and Kelty, and we have a special guest. And I am very excited to hear from our guest, Jennifer. Kelty, you want to give us a little intro? So, Jennifer is a Lady Ganger. She is coming to Lady World with my best friend, Katie. Remember when we did our best friend episodes and you met Katie? So, they are friends. And a few weeks ago,

Katie wrote me and she was like, I don't know, you never do this on Lady Gang. She listens every week. What's up? I call her boobs is her nickname. And I'm like, she's like, I have the craziest a story for you. And I really think you should interview my friend on Lady Gang because you will never believe what happened. And it's a really good lesson to people when they get screwed over by men. And I heard a little bit of the story and I was like, we're booking her. She's coming. So this is a new kind of show called Lady Gang Investigates Assholes. And we're going to invest. We want to know the whole, okay. So we want to know the whole story. This is, this is like our crew true crime. Like Jack has a true crime podcast where she does real crimes. We're

doing crimes against ladies. That's what it should be called. Yeah. Okay. So take us back to the beginning, Jennifer. Okay. Well, there is this really handsome guy that I was following on my Instagram and, uh, we would have like some conversation back and forth. We both have kids roughly the same age. And had you been married before? Like, so I'm separated. Yeah. So like four or five years out. And, um, he kind of claimed the same story. So he said that he had been, you know, separated three years and our little banter back and forth. Um, but I kind of assumed he was always with somebody because of just the way he was a bit protective and how we talked and then one day I was at the park and you know how Instagram makes the world so small

and everybody is two degrees of separation you recognize faces and I was like oh funny I recognize those kids and then I see this you know beautiful man behind them with his adorable dog and I'm like oh it's the dude and so first time ever seeing him get a message like two minutes after the park. I didn't go up to him at the park. Wait, you just saw him across the way? Our kids are on the monkey bars together. And I'm like, this is my chance. And then I was like, no, there could be like one of these lovely ladies could be his woman. Like, I'm not going to go up to him at the park and his children and my children. And so I just said nothing and sat on the sideline. Jennifer, I have questions before. So you were you guys talking on

dms were you texting how much was the conversation the conversation was flirty but friendly and it was more like oh he'd make a comment like i think we have kids the same age and i had respond back their ages and sure enough we did so he was like paying attention to my instagram like enough that those types of details were like you know resonating with him and then we would be doing similar activities with our kids and then he'd mention that he'd want to go do what i just did with the kids and he'd ask my advice about stuff. And so even though we didn't know each other in the slightest, we kind of had this weird Instagram connection. And how did the follow happen? Like, did he follow you? Did you follow him? I'm just so curious. So I started following him. I somehow,

somehow he's a public Instagram, like he's an athlete and he posted something on his Instagram or somebody reposted him is what happened and I was like oh follow okay um and that was kind of how it happened and what was his Instagram persona like was he like posting a lot was he doing shirtless selfies like was he business yeah like he when he's exercising and stuff there's lots of shirtless selfies and um it is not business it's the furthest thing from business it's like yeah Okay. So you're at the park, no contact. You see him at the park, kids are on the monkey bars together. My girlfriend's with me and she's like, go talk to him. And I'm like, absolutely not. And then literally as I'm walking away from

the park, you know, you see the little bubble happening on your Instagram DMs and he is messaging me. And he's like, was that, or as he was like, I saw the bubble, I wrote too scared to say hi because he didn't come and say hi to me either. And then he was like, I thought it was you and then was like I want to go out with you I want to see you and did you guys make eye contact at the park like was there did you acknowledge each other I pretended not to so I don't think we like physically connected but I was you know anytime I looked over I was also wearing sunglasses and yeah I just with my kids I've been asked out with my kids before and I always feel like it's so inappropriate and I'm like what are you doing like this is not the time and I don't want my

kids to see anything about this. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Then you go out. So we go on our first date and he's just a beefcake. Like he is so good looking, but he is a beefcake. Like I felt like, you know, I was forcing a little bit of the connection. Um, and yeah, I can't really recall my feelings at that moment other than like, Oh, he's really good looking. Okay. I met the guy that I had a crush on for the last year. Um, but I was also kind of dating other people. Like I wasn't serious about him at any capacity. And then slowly he just like said all the right things. He remembered all the right dates. Like I would, you know, an anniversary of a loved one that's passed. He's the dude that's sending you a message being like, I know it's early, but if you're available,

I'd love to like spend that day with you and let's drive out to my cabin and, you know, make this special and go for a canoe ride and all these things. And you're like, wow, who are you? Cause I've always, you know, craved that kind of attention to detail where somebody actually cared about the significant things, you know, and here, our bar is so low. It was like, but it was, it was very detailed. Like he must, he must have a photographic memory. And I'd say that to him, because like, he remembered numbers, he remembered, like, just I could see him like thinking as something was being said, like it was going in the Rolodex. And it was like, locked and loaded for future reference.

How often were you going on dates with him? So at the beginning, it was, you know, I have my kids 50% of the time. So I have 50% availability. And then I'm also social, and I'm with my friends. And I love my girlfriends. And I work a lot. And So, you know, maybe say 25% of the time we were hanging out. Were you having sleepovers? Sleepovers, public dates, doing all the things, going to new restaurants, going to his cabin, going to his house. We were doing the usual stuff. And then after a few months, I mean, he had kids my age, kids age.

It kind of felt safe for my kids to meet his kids. and at this point nobody has met my kids um and so we have the introduction at the park where we just introduce the kids as friends like we're just friends we're not dating yeah and um they hit it off and these kids are so cute together and our dogs are hitting it off and best pals and it just felt very serendipitous right you're like a parallel life coming together yeah and um And then it started to be like hanging out all the time. Like it went from, you know, a bit of my life to like every time I didn't have the kids, we were together. Like so 50 percent, always together.

And then slowly the kid portion became bigger and bigger. So then our kids started having sleepovers at that point. Obviously, they're in the know. They know we're dating. And then we're going to cabin weekends and we're doing all the activities. Like I'm really social and out there with my kids and we're doing all the fun activities and we're doing it as a family of four children and, you know, two parents in this blended thing. And like, we're not in a big city and we are out and about literally everywhere. Even through Instagram, like you just recognize everybody, even though you've never met them.

It's that small because your friends have been out with them and posted something with them or even people's kids from a birthday party at your friend's house. like you just, you just recognize everybody. So, and when you're saying like, I'm going out places, like there is a limited area of places that someone like Jennifer, you know what I mean? It's not like, Oh, if you live in Venice and I live in Sherman Oaks in LA, we never see each other. Like, it's like, there's only 15, you know, really cool places that people would go. So you're, you're a public, you're out the kids you're. And when you're out with him, you're holding hands you're like we're kissing he's the most affectionate person I've ever dated like always like arm around you like almost overly affectionate because it felt very protective but

now I'm like oh was that protective I was like maybe a bit a bit too much um I have a question so during this time is he like have you guys said I love you have you talked about the future I love values um he wants to have a baby i am 44 so there's no babies being had um but like the second i met him i was like i need an iud like this man is going to impregnate me and there's four children like i cannot have this happen and yeah like he always would say like what's one more you'd be you're such a great mom let's add another kid i would love to have a baby with you like it was always this conversation. And like, it actually made me beeline it to the gynecologist. Smart, smart, smart. You know, she was a little bit dumb in this story,

but also incredibly smart. So, okay. So continue. No, I wasn't dumb, Calgie. I wasn't dumb. No, you're right. You're right. No, you were, you were digmatized. Actually, no, there has been no, you know, of what's to come. There has been, I see no flaw. I see a man who is excited that he can have a blended family, who is affectionate, who remembers details. There is no blame on you. This, this sounds like the perfect guy for you. Yep. So some, some little things in reflection, it's like, you know, going to his house for the first time, there's a family photo of his ex, what I thought, um, and his children and him. And I was like, dude, that's so woke.

Like, I love that you have this up there. I love that you're that kind of co-parent, that you aren't erasing the other co-parents. So yeah, I suppose in reflection, that's pretty, you know, that would have been a big mistake. Okay. So keep going. I never, I never. And then I want to follow up with all the story. Okay.

So I never snooped though. Like I never did any sleuthing when it came to this man. Like maybe I Googled him once when we first started dating, what articles are written about him and his past as an athlete and things like that. But other than that, like, I don't think I even looked up his ex's name, you know, like the usual girl stuff. Like I just trusted because he was so outpouring of love and affection, like to the point that it felt too much that I would say to people like, guys, like it's so much of the good stuff that I'm like feeling suffocated. And they're like, Oh, Jen, you just need to learn to receive. This is just finally your turn of getting the super nice guy. This was your gut.

I'm pretty sure I feel smothered by all the, I love you messages and the constant calling and the constant texting and the showing up at my house and always being in the neighborhood and always around the block and dropping food off at my work every single day, every single day to the point where the other gals I work with are like, what is going on? I gained 10 pounds in a year of dating him because it was schnitzel and pierogies and potato varietals and gravy. And it's like stuff I don't eat. Gravy and like all the coleslaws. And it was so heavy. Anyways, who cooked, who cooked the food is what I'd love to know. Who

cooked the food oh my god um so everything's going along swimmingly how many months now we're probably at about 10 11 months wow okay and long time and um you know at this point it's still feeling like like too much and we had this trip planned in september i wanted to hike the west coast trail and it was on my bucket list and he's that thoughtful of a guy that heard me talking to a girlfriend about it and then booked it for me bought a flight for mother's day did all these things so I could check it off my bucket list and he doesn't hike I hike and he's like I'm gonna you know I mean just looking at recipes to cook for me on the trail so in in my head I was like make it to west coast trail and then like through the summer and then decide then you know because

it just wasn't fully connecting like soul level right it was just physicality and everything was really good I couldn't find anything to complain about except for he's too nice to me right and then I'm working at this training this other and I and she gets a message that um from this because she knows his ex through the grapevine and she gets a message um that she wanted to talk and um yeah she wanted to know what was the deal with me and him um her husband and um or partner I don't know if they're married, whatever they are, but partner of 18 years and they've never broken up and have always been together. And yeah, like I just was like, what? The man probably slept at my house four days a week, like more than not.

And his kids slept over. His kids were with my kids all the time to the point that my kids and his kids would be like, when are you guys getting married? we want to be sisters already. Um, I just want to like rewind here. Wait, how, so his kids never said anything about already having a mom, a mom who's with their dad. Anytime I brought up their mom, which I tried to do often because I'm separated and I know what it feels like and being the mother and having someone else look after your, your babies. Like it's, it, it takes getting used to right and I realized this would have been a big transition for her all of a sudden I'm around all the time doing all these things for her girls um and maybe shouldn't say girls kids and um buying them clothes and taking them all these places and all these experiences

and so I do we'd make crafts I'd be like do you want to bring this to your mom and they would get all weird about it and I and I'd be like or not you know Mother's Day I had like this package of stuff and I was like you should give this to your mom or and again I saw them get kind of strange about it and I was like or your grandma or your your teacher who whoever you want to give it to doesn't matter and so I started to kind of like retreat a bit from trying to be very like open and talkative about it like they'd help me cook dinner and I would ask them if they cook with their mom and they would just shut down so I kind of just thought it was like an uncomfortable place. When I realized after it's this place of like control, right? Like they weren't allowed

to talk about their mom to me and vice versa. And now back to the lady gang. So hold on. You find out someone calls a mutual worker and it's the woman, it's the wife. And she says hey I have found out about this woman what do you know like and your friend is like no they're dating like take me back to that conversation my she kind of I told her just you know say whatever but like don't you don't have to get involved like don't you don't have to like say the first time we went out like she can you know give her my phone number yeah but did you know when she contacted your friend did you know you thought that that was the ex-wife or the ex-partner 100 like you knew who she was right I I didn't actually know who she was and like I really like

I think I was told her name in passing and I have a memory of a goldfish that it wouldn't have even like registered and I feel like there was some weird block with him because with other people those things like you don't forget and with him it was I don't know like I didn't care almost I can't explain it but like it may because he overly compensated on the safeness of like how safe it is and he wants to be with me and how proud he is to be with me and can I post this on my Instagram my public Instagram this story and can I post this reel and I was like yeah sure like he posted you were on his Instagram all the time what so he would anything I posted whether it be with our children, us as a family, us going on a trip together, he would repost it and he had a public

Instagram and we have so many mutual followers. Um, that's actually not totally true, but as the time, you know, after the 10 months, 11 months, a lot of my friends are following him, family members, that kind of stuff. Um, so they would see it, but I'd have random people like come up to me or add me on Instagram because they knew of him. And then they were like, who's his girlfriend. And so then starting to follow me and I'd even like declined things or not answer because I'd ask him like, who's this person? He's like, Oh, I know them through X, Y, and Z. And that's like, ah, no, they're not following me on Instagram. So I knew that whatever he was posting, he was actually posting to the public. Like it wasn't just like, you know, the green to

your few family friends, you know, like this was, this was, but how was the wife not seeing this? I know. I think she must've been blocked. Like he's a smart guy. He must've had some sort of manipulation control over it. Um, I don't know. I even take the risk. Cause that's my number one thing. I always get squirrely when people are dating. And I was like, you've been dating for a year and he's never posted you on his Instagram. He's never like acknowledged that that feels weird to me that would have been like my first weirdness but the fact that he was you you oh no he had there was no there was no cold play ceo like that like we would go to like you know playoff games and we'd be in a box and we'd be like front and center and

i swear he would be praying for the kiss cam that's the kind of what the hell this is there was there was no shame in this there was no yeah how did he get away with sleeping out of the house four nights a week like did he does shift work so I don't know sorry guys I don't know how to turn that off um he does shift work so I don't know if he claimed to be working all the time um I actually I don't know I don't know what he said I mean you stayed the night at his house a bunch right so I didn't actually sleep at his house and so in retrospect this was maybe an error but like to me his house and I don't want to like shame anybody like I don't know maybe we don't put this on but like to me it was a dude's house like it was like yeah I walked in yeah and it's like

his belts from things that he's done well in and it's like like out on the displayed as like furniture and I just like it was a dude's house and I even made comments I'm like you know I'll come in and like give it a woman's touch because he had talked about selling his house and I was like I'll stage it for you and so I like it wasn't warm and cozy to me and so my house we just always were at my house but I thought about it too after the reason we were always at my house was because he was always around the corner he was always I'm just dropping something off I'm just down the street. He was always on route to my house. So there wasn't even that conversation. So he had this way of controlling it so that it was at my house that made it just seem super convenient,

right? Like it seemed like he was just making my life easier, um, by always being so available and like so available. Like I could message him at like midnight and be out with friends, you know, drinking too many martinis and message him and be like, come get us. and he would drive us to the next place and then go and like wait for me at my house kind of thing I am so confused so did you confront him after this conversation with the wife or yeah what happened so I never actually had the chance to speak with her which I feel is a bit unfortunate but maybe that she's not ready for that or she is you know she would care she cares more about working it out than knowing the truth of it but um and that's fair you know like wherever she's at

But so I haven't ever talked to her, but I did just ask him, where does she live? Because she's claiming that they live together. They always have in this house that I. Hold on. No, you need Jennifer. Okay, hold on. You get the text. The friend gets the text.

Friend gets this message. What does she respond to the wife? So I think they talked on the phone. And so this is, I only have bits of this. And she never asked to talk to you. She just wanted to talk to your friend. that's so weird to talk to her I'm like here's my phone you can read every message from the last year like what do you what do you need to see what do you need to know because like I've been

cheated on I'm sure we all have been cheated on and it's like I would have always loved I would have loved that opportunity you get I would have loved that opportunity to like talk to the other person like and know the story versus like being gaslit and like only getting bits and pieces right So anyhow, it's okay. But I never got the opportunity. So I only got bits and pieces from this person I know. So it was kind of fragmented, but she essentially did know about me.

The truth did come out that there was essentially a double life for this last almost year. And yeah, the conversation was that she's staying with him and gonna figure it out. How was the conversation with you and him? after this call you text him and you're like what the bro soon as I heard this I started thinking about it and I was like okay you really are never at his he's always at yours there was like it kind of just all the pieces started to fall together and so I kind of had fun with it like I didn't

call him I didn't get mad at him and like that weekend just to paint a picture of like where we were at in the relationship the Friday um I had some girlfriends over and he messaged me that he wants to drop something off for my kids for finishing school for the year they're in kindergarten and grade two like they don't need a present for finishing school they need ice cream and that's it but anyhow he's dropping this present off and I'm I'm actually annoyed because I'm like dude no you're not I don't want you just to drop by with your kids when I'm here with my friends and anyways he has a present so I'm like Jen quit being a bitch accept the love accept the kindness, receive, receive, receive feminine energy. And so he, he shows up and he's got

these expensive earrings for my kids. And I'm just like, what are you doing? Handwritten cards of how special they each are and how he picked the, you know, the special, special stone for each of them that are in these earrings based on their personalities and all this stuff. So that happens, these cards and my, but you know, you're, they're unwrapping the earrings and you're like, this is too much and i even like shared it with some girlfriends like some other of the moms like look what he just did because everybody is like oh jen you're gonna marry him and i'm like am i and i and i sent it and even when i sent it i felt so cringe i was like oh it actually like hurts my stomach those parts like why does it feel gross when it's so kind you know yeah okay

this is before she knew wait this is before she knew okay okay okay or she knows and i just know you know, before you knew what happened immediately after. Yeah. Um, but I just, I just have to tell you this one thing on the Saturday. So this happens on Sunday, the Saturday before he's at my mom's grave with his daughters, sending me pictures with his youngest, with a bouquet of flowers, bringing this bouquet of flowers to the woman that created the woman that they love what pictures I have the pictures of this um and showing me videos of all the wildflowers around my mom's grave and um and this was because the grave is like maybe 15 minutes away from his cabin it's like a decent drive so he made a point to go to this grave

every single time they went to the cabin no and then it's like shirtless pictures and more pictures of him and the girls and then Sunday I'm waking up to like good morning messages and we miss you and wish you guys were at the cabin with us and then do you think Sunday afternoon I get this message do you think he was at the cabin with his wife that weekend maybe who who knows because now come on honey we just need to make a stop at a grave and then I get this this message and it's you know, Sunday afternoon about late Sunday afternoon about how he's never separated and been together for 18 years and they're fully together. Nothing else. And so then I sent him a message. This is all I said. And I said, where does your ex live? And he normally replies to me

instantly. And it took him like two hours to reply, which is so out of character. And I just, And he'd sent some address that's like a 12 minute drive, which made no sense to any of his stories. He always told me these stories of her living like down the block and so convenient because he could just stop and get the kids and bring them to school. And which now I realize is because they're in the same house, the same flipping house. so of course it's convenient um and and yeah and then I just knew everything he had said to me was a lie at that point so he had tried calling me and I wasn't answering and then the next day I was kind of like so what's going on and he's like I don't know she's lost her mind you know the story is always that women are crazy and women you know it's always it's so it's so cliche and it's so frustrating and soon as I heard that too I was like oh dude oh I knew instantly and so I guess I get these messages that she's crazy and he wants to prove it to me so he sends a

screenshot of these this email thread between him and this person and it's a fabricated email account that he's emailing himself no and it was like Batman and Robin type stuff like it or is it Batman and Joker I guess you'd say it was like you know I'm gonna get you you're finally happy um and he's like what did you do and she's like you'll soon find out ha ha ha ha and it was no no woman speaks like that first of all and yeah as soon as i read it i was just like can you send me the thread of that like the email can you forward that did you look it up there's no chance even like her name and then like you know account 19 like no all of it it was just it was I I knew what I had done but yeah so then what oh god so then

um he's continuing to paint this picture of crazy um I'm working like a crazy busy day so I'm just like kind of checking my messages like every so often and he's like you know just telling me more crazy stuff that she's done and you know I'm like if she's so crazy maybe she shouldn't be with the kids right now like that doesn't sound very like I'm just like you know trying to call out how silly it all was and he's like well I called our child and family service agency here and they said you know unless x y and z is in place I can't get the like it was just it was so bonkers and I was like uh-huh I'm like I'm just not having it and so when I finished work I asked my girlfriend if she wanted to take a drive and I was like let's drive to his house like unannounced and just show

up oh so we get in the car smart and there's his his vehicle isn't there and so I was like let's go check out this address that he told us about and so we we drive to this this house that made no sense to any of his stories any of the the past lies and I was like no this doesn't make any sense and she's like let's just go home I'm sure she was like super uncomfortable I was like no let's go back to his house one more time just in case and um we pull up in his car is now there and so I go and I'm knocking at the door and it's like one of those sing-song doorbells like and it's like super loud and annoying and I'm just like pressing it on repeat and it's probably like 8 30 p.m and he had just told me how he does not have the kids the kids are with their mom

because right like he I was like well that doesn't sound safe if she's so unwell um and then not answering the door I can hear the dog barking I know his truck is there I know he's home and then my girlfriend that's waiting slightly outside of the yard um sees a little face peer down from between the blinds so I know that this is the family home and I immediately retreated Cause I'm like, these kids are already going to be scarred enough from this whole ordeal. Um, and I just left, but the answer was there. I knew what my gut was telling me. And so, um, later that night he called me and I said, why didn't you answer the door?

And he said he was putting his daughter to sleep. And I was like, funny, why did you have your daughters? Oh, I went and picked them up. um and then I said well I'm actually in the car on my way over um which was I'm not sure I had my pimple patches on and it was like tequila with my girlfriends and he's like why are you just coming to check if there's women's things and I was like well there's either women's things or there's not women's things and his reply was sorry I'll drop your keys off tomorrow oh my god what and you never heard from him again um well my reply was dude my locks already changed like

I was in the know of this from 9 a.m this morning how crazy this all is and had the locksmith there immediately but um yeah he tried calling me back after that and I blocked him and blocked his everything and that was the end of it and how long ago was this again it's been a month oh my god no it's new that's why she needs to come to lady world jennifer you're listening to the lady gang you know the the craziest thing is like you know we we've heard stories like this but i've never heard a story quite like this with kids where kids were so intertwined where they were the pawns where they were so involved in um all the details of this because it's no longer your double life it is now their double life and it's like that's

the thing that like i can't wrap my head around that and the food who cooked me the oh jesus um but i met his parents you guys like he met my parents like we like we're intertwined what did his parents say and i say parents is my dad but i mean he met my mom plenty of times because he was at her grave on the regular but literally were his parents weird about you or or anything So, yeah. So when I met his parents, they own a store and I, and I kind of was feeling a bit strange that I hadn't met them yet. Cause I was spending so much time with his kids and like all these things. Like I keep wanting to like throw all these other stories into my, my other story, my ADHD story. And we love it. We're hanging on every word. I like literally

my friend and I were like, let's just cold call this store. Let's just like go to it. and we um decide one afternoon we both didn't have too much work we're like hey look today's the day and he's like just tell me before you go so i'll make sure they're there like i don't want you just showing up and they're not there and someone else is working there and so i told him we're gonna go at some point i didn't say what time and he um was like all right i'm gonna let them know they're gonna be so excited to meet you and so her and i are leaving we're just pulling out of my house and as we're pulling out he pulls in and I'm like oh weird like why is he here and so he's like well I'll take you guys to the store like come hop into my vehicle we'll all go

together my girlfriend's like okay she's like in the back seat and his dog is all over and so we get to the store and they're speaking in a different language and I'm perusing the store because I love to shop and um you know being smiling and like so nice to meet you and then after like their 10-15 minutes of talking and us filling our carts with stuff um they're like we've heard so much about you so nice to meet you you know he seems super happy like saying all the the things that he they I'm assuming was instructed to just say right like I what this is so bananas I'm so confused wait Jennifer are you filthy rich well I'm not rich but I I mean I live in a nice house and I like I don't know I wondered about

that i'm like deploy for for the baby was like get child support from me or um i i have thought about that i also wondered was it like a a team effort yeah husband and wife was this yeah was this like you go out and make some money for us i don't don't put that on did they ever steal anything like when you guys were on dates or you're on trips like did you pay for everything um no actually he was quite generous and he was always dropping gifts off on the regular like he bought me nice jewelry i mean it was all very gaudy not my style but like for sure expensive yeah i still have to get rid of it that's like the one thing i haven't purged but do you think that there's any chance it's like do you think this is the first time that he's done

this oh no chance he was telling me about his ex-girlfriends and one ex-girlfriend was like harassing so he said um his mom on facebook and i have no doubt she was probably in a similar situation to me where it was like give me answers like how would i be involved in your life and everyone's lives and no one's telling um the truth kind of thing that's my guess um but he did tell stories of these other women and they were too detailed to maybe just have been fabricated you know um well i'm so confused i'm so sorry this is a nightmare but i don't actually feel like that guys you know like the mountain women i knew my intuition if anything it was like holy shit your intuition's good because like from the get-go i like had these little things

that everyone around me is like oh my gosh and what a man like look at him and look what he does and he's cooking he's cleaning he's you know he planted me a garden and built a garden box and like he's just he was always doing super kind thoughtful things whereas I felt smothered when I was like take it take it I was like I can't take it I hate it I'm an independent lady I don't you know so there was moments of like yeah clarity in all of this and trusting my intuition and not settling because how many of us have done that oh time and time again where it feels good enough and it looks good so we're like okay good for now and the amount of women I talk to because I work with a lot of women it is so many of these type of stories like not cheating stories but

double life types of stories where it either happened to their friend or their maybe not this intertwined with like children and parents, but enough that it goes on for years and they have no idea about the wife and her being pregnant and yada, yada, yada. Did you ever meet any of his friends? So you've just, you like were intertwined in like all of his life. I'm just like, how does somebody have such a chokehold on like everybody in their lives to like go along with the ruse? It's so crazy. I think he's really good at telling the story. So whether the story is his partner and him are on a break and I'm dating Jen and then now we're done and he's like I'm back with her and they just go along with it I am not sure you know but um like we were

intertwined and I think the the part that is like really um difficult to stomach like okay fine he chooses to live his life this way but it's like the people that know there's more to this story and protect it you know especially when there's children involved so that's the part that like irks me like okay fine he's unwell and he's going to keep doing what he's doing he's going to do it to someone else but um the fact that these other bystanders are just like shoulder shrug or they like being standing next to him too right like we're choosing um the wrong reasons are you nervous at all for your safety um so in some ways yes like um yeah like he's a strong big guy you know and I haven't been quiet about it to be honest like I had

when this all happened I had like 30 seconds of shame like I had 30 seconds of oh my god I'm never telling anybody about this like yeah as if I let this happen you know a mother and all these things and then I was like that's like no chance like the idea of being quiet or being the bigger person and being silent and letting this kind of stuff perpetuate is like it's so gross to me and I would rather tell my story that is truthful and I have all the pictures and text messages to back it up um then sit down and let it continue you know or and I and I don't mean this in a vigilante way like he's going to do this again I'm not going to stop that but like I couldn't just sit back and um not let his partner know the truth so I did write her a letter and I wrote a letter like

mother to mother I like I I wasn't saying it to call him down or call him names or you know to question where the heck was she for a year um because I have no doubt she questioned the same things about me like why didn't I look in the closet why didn't I look in drawers how did I miss these obvious signs of her and where I'm maybe thinking that too and I guess I'm so grossed out and sick of this narrative of women blaming women or women are crazy and the man kind of just you know goes on his merry way and we're left to pick up the pieces and you know ensure our children have the adequate counseling and you know like I I had to tell my kids the truth I was like well how do I just say we broke up and my oldest is such an old soul and so intuitive and

so um aware of things like she didn't buy it for one second she was like no you didn't and I was like yeah you're right we he's he's married and she's like a cheater and and I know that's probably like too big of a topic to really give to little kids but I wanted it to be a safe space for us to like really talk about it because they had so many questions of like how when he was always around he tucked us into bed he showed up at every recital he was on the pickup list at school he like was so intertwined in their lives that I I felt like dumbing it down and making some excuse for it would almost be a disservice to them so how I really talked with them about it is like I really believe he loved them like I have no doubt about that I have no doubt he loved me like I know

he wanted this life, but he obviously wanted his other life as well. Right. Like he wanted both as a lot of men do. Right. Classic man. Oh my gosh. Well, Jen, my mind is blown. The mind is blown. Thank you for coming on. Oh my God. We're going to discuss this more, probably at lady world. I'm going to find you on the beach. We do have a lady world activity called the let go gathering, which we are doing with Kelsey Chittick. And she wrote this beautiful book about letting go and grief. And we're going to do like a beach walk of where you like, you know, write down your shit and burn it and all that stuff. So I can't wait to see you at the let go gathering. And then enjoy some 21 seeds tequila. You deserve both of those things

in a big way um I just I think this is just such a good lesson to trust your gut yes yes no thank you for sharing your story I know a lot of women will either resonate or that like something will touch them from this yeah well and I mean I I do hope that right like it's by talking about this story I hope we like normalize the traumas and yeah um in the sense that I don't want it to be normal when we see that it happens to others but normalize that we want to share it and be open about it and not shamed by it you know yes so wow wow so nice to meet you i can't wait to meet you in person guys i know if anybody else has a crazy story this may be a new series ladies i love it okay we will see you next tuesday social support from khali kolera editing

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