LadyGang - Dr. Emily Morse of Sex With Emily joins The LadyGang - Ep18

Episode Date: April 4, 2016

Dr. Emily Morse, host of the "Sex With Emily" podcast, answers all the questions you're too terrified to ask anyone else including, the truth about the female orgasm, kegel camp, birth control, squirting, the great hair debate, lubricant, oral sex, and the elusive g-spot. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey guys, it's your lady gang, Jack Vanek, Kelty Knight, and Becca Tobin. Thank you so much for subscribing on iTunes, and thanks for supporting the great sponsors who make it possible for us to have this much fun with you every single week for free. Well, what is this? Welcome to the lady gang. That's amazing. Say that again. The lady gang.

Things are about to change around here. Each week, we catch up with Hollywood's hottest girl posse, Kelty Knight, Becca Tobin, and Jack Vanek. Hello, everyone. Welcome to a very special episode of Lady Gang. Oh, my gosh. I've been looking forward to this all week, you guys. Me too.

I'm so excited. We have a very special, sexy guest, Dr. Emily Morse. She's a sex expert. She's going to do a special episode and really basically answer all of our questions. And you know we have some because you've heard the rest of the episodes. You know we're very confused. She, of course, is the host of the very, very popular and radical podcast, Sex with Emily. And she also has a site.

Amazing. but we want to welcome you we want to make sure that you're heading over to itunes subscribing to the podcast leaving us a five-star review i think you're going to want to have to hear this one um you can always listen at podcastone.com or on the podcast one app you can also follow us at the lady gang and this week is the week that we're going to hit 10 000 followers yeah it's going to happen so go over there because we have something very special planned when we get that you can also go to the ladygang.com sign up for our newsletter and that's also of course where you can do your Ask the Lady Gang questions.

I want to start today, just before we get into everything, with a very special email that we got regarding one of our episodes. That Kelty was very confused about. I'm scared. So it came from Taylor Swift. The name is Taylor Swift. The email address is... Not the real Taylor Swift.

I'm too famous to give you my email at swiftnation.com. Sounds real to me. The subject is cockroaches at the zoo. The message says All three of you lovely ladies Now have your own cockroach named after you At the Bronx Zoo You're welcome, love the podcast, hug hug

So either this is the real Taylor Swift And she loves the podcast And she heard us kind of bagging on her About the ridiculousness of the Grammys And she's now named the cockroaches Because you can name cockroaches after someone you hate Or this is a super fan She has a big vendetta against us

I'm going to do some digging And I'm going to find out what her official or unofficial well we looked up swift nation.com it doesn't exist so we don't know who it was but either way here's the thing we we like taylor swift i just wasn't a fan of that moment so let's just be clear and becca is holding her tongue becca what's coming up because i'm gonna burp okay it's time for good week yes it is bad week oh no all right um jack i'm going first you're going first today okay so my good week is guess what oh my gosh she made it a too lazy to be crazy flannel is that for me um no i need this one you can buy yours on dot com no i'll bring you one

next week i my too lazy to be crazy flannels are available now we're just peddling everybody needs our wares but everyone needs this so badly this is like our own little mini inside joke that we've made and now i think i think everybody like deserves to be a part of it i think i'm a part of pop culture in a cool way that i never have been before i know don't you feel included i feel so included this was inspired by both of you guys well we're gonna instagram a picture of this because it's everything good job jack way to be a real entrepreneur you know i'm trying to do my thing so anyways that's my good week my my bad week okay so i feel like i am a pretty like open minded person like i don't really judge people that much like just except for like all the time

on this podcast but there's some there's a few things in life that i think are like douchebag level five million okay and that really bother me okay one of those things are fedora hats another one of those things are e-cigarettes okay yeah and the third thing which you will disagree with me on are hoverboards no i agree oh no kelty definitely won't she spins her own cbs on her kelsey loves hoverboards so and okay so i've had this my roommate and i have had the we have this like the little things that we say and we say one of them is an e-cig is like a fedora for your mouth okay and the other one is a hoverboard is like an e-cig for your feet so all those things are like connected in my mind yes like it's douchebag yeah i appreciate that scott

wrote a hoverboard while smoking an e-cig didn't he wearing a fedora please god so the other day i was driving down the street and thank god it was not scott i would break up with him immediately i'm driving down the street in a normal like two-lane road right where there's like cars going through the streets and who rolls up next to me nick cannon no just some adult male on a hoverboard wearing a fedora smoking an isek no way not kidding god sent that down from the heavens for you just so you know he's watching you know what and here's the thing too is i was right by my house and there's something weird about my street that every time i drive down my street like weird stuff happens and i'm like am i on the truman show like things will be like

okay now ball go out but where's the kid and then i have to like look for the kid and then it's like oh car crash right in front of my house there's always something happening and i'm like this was somebody's videotaping me right now for one second were you turned on no what like for one second were you like wow no i was wrong about the fedoras and the e6 no no that was like the worst thing that's ever happened to me i was very offended oh my god kelty can you beat that i can um you always can here's my good week it's very quick uh my husband was talking to me and he used the word colloquial and my panties got wet i thought your word was um bleak bleak wait that's just he used the word my husband has an amazing vocabulary and he was like it's very colloquial and i i just

thought you're so smart and i'm so turned on and i just thought it was such a great word this is the hot it's hot it is hot and that was it like that's my i've honestly had a really i've had a horrific week and so there was one bright light of like my husband saying colloquial in a sentence and then the rest has been pretty shitty um tell us about it okay bad week please tell us so please tell us all the things you haven't already told us about your bad week okay so last um a couple episodes ago i talked about tiny mouse do you guys remember when i found the mouse and i rescued it in the tupperware and put it in the field did you found him dead on the side no listen to this so then i'm cleaning up again and i look over to the trash bin and i see another mouse hopping in

the trash i told you they were in your house i told you so now it's official i have mice so this is what happens i'm like oh my gosh tiny mouse was has a brother so i think okay the tiny mouse went in this there was two in the flowers and i didn't notice so then i close up the trash bag i make chris take the trash bag out we're sure we got the mouse because we're looking everywhere under the sink there's nothing and then i noticed that almost entirely underneath my sink you guys are gonna think i'm pigs but you know my house is sparkling clean yeah yeah uh the whole thing under the sink is just filled with mouse poop the whole thing and so i start taking out the trash bag box and like i opened the trash bags and it's just mouse poop so like they've been in there for

now three weeks and so i have to stop you what'd you do with the tiny mouse's brother that was in the garbage well i took i tied him down and put it in the no i put it in the dumpster no i'm not being nice to the mouse anymore you guys you suffocated that mouse for saying i would turn the disposal on no i thought i was guilty that's even worth worse because the disposal will kill Oh my God. I can't speak. Kill the mouse immediately. Yeah, no, now it's in hell in the dumpster. And so slowly dying. No, listen, it gets worse you guys. So then, um, so then I have to call the exterminator to like, make sure there's no other mice. Right. So he comes over and he, Oh no. And he can't come for a day. He's busy. So I go down to home Depot and I get the,

I'm trying to decide what mouse trap to get. So here's the options, the mouse trap that you go, it goes in and then when it tries to get back out a noose goes on it and it strangles it shut up secondly uh mousetrap it goes in and then it just chops it in half and then the why are these worse than like a normal mouse it's horrific um so the one i chose was the sticky foot one where it's just like a little pan of like sticky you can't get out of another slow death it's a horrific so anyway i clean out everything we put the sticky trap down and i'm like hey so here's the good news i had to go to work so i sent elena my assistant lady i sent her the next day at 12 o'clock to meet the exterminator and i was like let me know how it goes so she texts me and she goes okay so we

boarded up the holes and resealed all the pipes so you won't have any other problems um but there were seven tiny mice on the mouse pad this morning seven oh my god seven tiny were they alive i yeah that's the end of the story that sounds like coachella it was anyway i'm terrified it was horrible there's more mice i tried to be nice i tried to be hippie let me get the tiny mouse and save it nope those mice if you come in my house do you think they're ever gonna run your pita out again it's okay i did one too oh guilty it's out that wins before any before mine okay okay now you're gonna win here's mine okay um so my good week was i went to this spa in beverly hills it's a japanese spa saw this on your insta and you get your massage by this tiny little asian

woman who puts literally she's on your body on all fours her knees are in your hamstrings her elbows are in your back it's like a Thai massage it was amazing like so good and I'm not even really one of those massage people I can like deal with it for 15 minutes and then I'm like thinking about other you know whatever you gotta have a strong nice yeah it was amazing and then when you're finished they bring in sugarfish sushi what where is this it's in Beverly Hills it's called tomoku or tomoko or something that is my heaven excuse my awful pronunciation it was amazing it was beautiful so that was like yourself right treat yourself i need to do that next week um okay so that was my good week here's my bad week okay last night i went to an event for um it's called

a list and it's the a list it's like for a pr company for brands and all this stuff so the owners is beautiful amazing generous woman who invites us to her house to try on jewelry and get clothes and like one of those really fun life on the a-list so famous so so famous no one's ever inviting us to this stuff i've never been you're not ready yet okay so i'm feeling like cute i got to like style myself which is always nice no i got like normal adult clothing um and so i'm i'm i feel really cute and i'm not one of those people who ever looks in the mirror and i'm like i got it you know what i mean i i'm like this will do i'm fine like i'm very much aware of where i stand in the in the hollywood pyramid so i but i'm feeling pretty good and i go i go

to this event and five minutes after getting there olivia colpo the one that was against me in the best dress miss universe miss universe i lost two she's haunting us she walks into this house and she didn't have her hair and makeup done professionally or from what i could tell because you can usually tell those things she like pulled her hair back like in a like easy bun she might have done a little something to her eyebrows had on some mascara but that was like really it and i just like look at her and i'm like this is why i feel bad about myself living in hollywood she is like the most stunning human being on the planet she's also very cool and very sweet so i'm like oh i feel shitty about myself because like i'm just not like that girl just an

average girl you're not missing and i'm also i'm not miss universe and it's like so upsetting and i'm also so aryan which gets me really pissed off like she has like some sort of i can't offend people of my own my own color anyway she has some sort of sprinkle of something amazing and it's like as like a little jewish white girl you're standing there like looking up at this like naturally tall magical creature and you're like where did i go wrong like where how how did my mom just not find some like hot sexy cuban man you know it's like i love you dad but like why didn't she cheat on you you know seriously so like just moments like that where you go from feeling like top dog to you know you gotta get knocked down somehow or your head's too big

anyways that's true please um i love that olivia and we actually asked her to be on the podcast and I don't think she said no, but her people said no. And I feel like we should. I think she'd be great on it. I think she'd be amazing. We love her. But here's the thing. We're going to put her in a small black box and she'll do the podcast from behind that

so we can't see her and feel bad about ourselves. I'll just like start crying. I'm fine with that. All right. Should we move on? I'm so excited what's coming up. We're going to have Dr. Emily Morse here and she's going to answer and we're calling this all the sex questions that you're scared to talk about with your friends.

I love it. okay what's going on now here's the lady gang okay we have a very special guest today dr emily morris she was voted the number one dating and sex expert by datingadvice.com and the number one dating and sex expert to follow on twitter she's proven to be the go-to thing for all sex and relationships she's the author of the very popular book that i need to pick up hot sex over 200 things you can try tonight she's the host of sex with emily it's a radio show and a podcast that you can listen to in your car and it's awesome she's appeared on pretty much every show that exists today's show dr drew the doctors bravo inside edition watch what happens live

e um and we're very excited that you're here because i think our listeners are going to learn a lot and i am going to learn a lot i hope so welcome so fun and you had cocktails yeah this would be a good time but then yeah champagne same thing and alcohol it's good it's how you get people on your side. Yeah. Yeah. That's how you have a little bit. I was already in. So first of all, I want to know, what do your parents think of your career? That's a great question. Um, they're actually really supportive. My mom at the beginning, she's like, you're doing what? Like your sex? What? Like, Oh God, my crazy daughter in California. Cause I'm from Michigan, but it's been 10 years. And I think it's just like, she was like, how are you gonna make a

living doing that? And for a long time I struggled because I did start a podcast 10 years ago when seriously people just figured out what it was maybe two years ago with cereal yeah yeah and she's like what are you doing i'm like you know do what you love the money will follow you guys have this great questionnaire you're asking me here like about these do you talk about this that people should go to your instagram and see the questions this is awesome like one book every girl needs to read and stupidly maybe after college i read do what you love the money will follow and i believe like what's my passion so i did a lot of different things and then i finally stumbled on something this is it i love sex talk so now that it is i've it's you know a living she's

like fine with it she's as long as you're like paying your rent you're doing fine but they're not you know my father passed away when i was young but i often think god what would he what would he think no but i think he'd be cool my whole family's just i think they get a kick out of me and you know what it is yes it is sex with my mom so he's like oh she's got a show about relationships depending on who she's talking to like whatever clients right i'm like that's cool right exactly don't google my daughter but i think my family it's really you know entrepreneurial and doing my own things but isn't it crazy that there is that stigma oh because we're all having sex So why is it so weird to talk about it?

Well, that's why, okay, so right. So that's the thing is that there's so much stigma with sex. And I, the reason why I started it was because I was confused about sex. I was like, why is everyone saying they're having the best sex of their life all the time? Because I just, you know, I'm also like hard on myself. So I'm like, I certainly haven't had the best sex in my life. So I just started interviewing people about their sex life and their relationship. And that's how it started.

But yes, it is still very taboo. But my show's pretty, I mean, it's not like a dirty sex, like, you know, show. but it's it's informational and educational but you cannot get away from sex like when people unhear your form you're like what's your nickname i'm like sex like you're like oh there's sex hey sex like when you're at a bar my friend's like oh i want to introduce you to this guy like here's my friend sex with emily i'm like so it is and people hear that and it's just you know they make obviously judgments but i love what i do and everybody has sex what is the number one question you get asked um i get asked um you mean sex questions yeah like what when people find out

what you do they want to know their thing what is the thing well their sex question i would say is um why can't i have an orgasm during intercourse interesting question yeah it is i mean because the thing is we're fed this myth that every woman just magically has like orgasms and like you know has you know firecrackers going off fireworks going off but only 30 of women can actually have one during penetration and of that 30 not every time like probably you know yeah half the time maybe this is one of the questions coming up so i want to get you to answer that um i want to know about the kegel camp okay because wtf i think i think i know the kegel is that when you lift the golf balls with your vagina i don't know you have a camp where you're going to teach people and so

What I wanted to do- Wait, there's an actual camp? I have an iPhone app called Kegel Camp. Oh. It's a Kegel. I'm not even saying it right. No, it's Kegel Kegel. Here's the thing.

We're all sitting here in chairs, and most of the people that are listening are probably- I was just doing a Kegel. And so here's the thing. Explain what it is. We're going to do one together. Oh, I love this. We can hold hands. So here's the thing.

So they are- The reason why you should do them, women and men, but women for women. Men and women do it the same way, but it's our pelvic floor muscles, right? So over time, the atrophy. Like they will get weakened They will get weaker Especially after like Childbirth

Just as you get older Which means that you Sneeze and you pee You Which isn't fun Urinary incontinence And also women Who have trouble

Having orgasms It's like any other muscle The stronger you Make these muscles You build these muscles Like do them for a month Every day for five minutes Like you will be

Having more orgasms You will be having More sexual I'm buying it So how you do it Is you You know the Okay

When you The pee stopping muscles so when you stop and start the flow of urine like someone's knocking on the door you're like those are the muscles so we're all doing it are you doing it so you're like okay find that muscle you tense it and you hold for five seconds and then you relax oh so you're supposed to hold it three seconds i've just been doing like well okay but you could start with like three seconds but you're supposed to hold them and then relax them and then my app has 20 levels that you go through so it's like really hard it takes like weeks if you do it every day hold on but i now it's making

me feel like i have to pee is that right i also have to pee just no well maybe we shouldn't do but you could do it yeah it is normal but okay if you already peed then you're you're fine but there's all these great the thing about kegels is there's all these great tools now there's like kegel balls there's this yeah is it better to use something or is it good enough honestly you could do this like i have a friend who's she's a sexologist as well and she's like every time i'm on the phone i if i'm having a phone call like i just do like that's her trigger because people are like oh you can do a traffic light but no one remembers and the reason why i created the app because i was like it has a reminder function so it's like time for kegel camp on my phone every

day at 11 and i'm always like snooze because you know it's hard to do your own thing but then i eventually do them and i just you know and then you build up to like these levels but yeah you and that's i think you'll feel it like i feel it like i feel more turned on i feel like i can have different i know different kinds of like orgasms that are not usually as accessible um have you heard of the phenomenon naked stretching and yoga do you want me to tell you about it so I invented something great where um so if you don't feel like having sex or you're not really you know you're busy woman on the go you can just get naked stretch like do a full yoga class and have your man just lay there and look at you and I think they like it okay but here's the thing that to

me sounds like he's just going to be like get over here because you're so hot and i'm turned on yeah and then they have a bony then they have a bone then you're just that's like foreplay like i can imagine what if he's like taking care of business yeah what if he's taking care of if you don't want to have sex and he takes care of business and it's over in 10 minutes then you're not you're good and what do you think what would i think that's fine i mean if you if you're not in the mood for sex yeah which as long as it's not like a ongoing like every night you're like time for naked stretching and you're going to often have sex with your husband, I'd be like, maybe everyone's third day have sex.

But God, there's so many times we're just not in the mood. So yeah, nothing wrong with him getting his and you getting your stretching. Naked stretching. I have no problem with that. Dr. Approved. Dr. Approved. Hey. Okay.

And you're stretching. And you're getting a workout. Which I love. I like it. Okay. So what we did is we have so many female listeners and I think we didn't want to have people tweet in our Instagram because we wanted them to stay anonymous. And so we wanted our listeners to have the opportunity to have a conversation with you and ask the questions that they are terrified

to ask anyone else. Because here's the very interesting thing is that, you know, here we talk about a lot of things, but there is that stigma even with your girlfriends of like, you don't want to admit that you're the one with the whatever. No, absolutely. That's why I do radio and that's why I do podcasting because people can be anonymous. Okay. So here they go. These are the sex questions we're scared to ask our friends. So all anonymous. Here's the first one. How wet is the right amount of wet and what do you do if your vagina just is always dry? Oh, that's a great question. Okay. So first of all, there is a myth that how wet you are indicates your arousal level. And it can fluctuate for a lot of women throughout

the month. You can be more wet than others. You can be aroused and not be wet at all. you can be really wet and not be aroused so that's just one thing i want to clear because you know guys are like oh she's not wet but that's really interesting did you guys know that no and i think there needs to be like a t-shirt yeah no seriously well you know let me tell you my dream so let me tell you the answer is that lubricant like my issue is that like my dream one of them i should add this to my quiz uh lube on every nightstand like because lubricant is so underrated because people think and i think guys think this too they're like oh she's like there's a problem i'm not turning around enough so if we use lube she's dry it's my fault or there's

discomfort like lube is something like you keep like tucked away if it's yeah if something's going wrong yeah something's wrong but i bring out the lube no no i use lube all even if you're wet it just it just adds a little something to it because it's a different consistency yeah and i'm telling you like i've never like i think you can never have like too much lube in your life and leave it on your nightstand and make it part of your so that's what you do just add you know it could be like medication she's taking it could just could be her natural cycle but i love and you don't buy the kind of the drugstore it's like don't buy astroglide what's your go-to do you have a go-to my favorite is pure it's uh pjur um and you know it's a little more expensive but it's you know

probably like 15 16 a bottle but it'll have a little pump so it's easy you don't have to like oh wait hold on let me like you know i like little and look comes in like a classy bottle so it could be like face lotion but you just add a little bit but don't but but it's not but i fear seriously think that women should not be ashamed of it because also there's studies that show that women who actually added lubricant were more likely to have orgasms than not. I believe that. Yeah, 100%. Right? Because it's a different

even if you're right, it goes away. Fuck, but this is you just keep adding. Like, I just always like the more lube, the merrier. And then you can put it on your body, rub around. It's a good time. Okay. I love that. See? We're so glad you're here. That's only question one. Now I'm not going to feel so bad when I'm, like, dry as a

desert down there. We're going to bring you some stuff next. I can't wait. You guys are going to be on my podcast soon, and I will bring you some more. I can't wait. Okay, someone on Twitter actually was brave enough to ask. They wanted to know what a queef is. What a queef is? What's a queef? No, I don't think they're asking what a queef was.

I think they're asking what do you do when you queef? Is it embarrassing? How should you react? Just keep going. Like if you're in the middle of something, I say sex is messy. It's not always, you know, there's a lot of fluids. There's a lot of noises. There's grunts.

There's things, you know, and if you're with, I say you just keep going. Like it's a natural part of sex Like you're going to queef You're going to do other things you don't want to do There's going to be weird liquid Things are going to come out And I think you just keep going Or you could like smile

I mean I don't know I mean just keep going It's like totally natural It happens I have a really great trick It means that you have the penis in and out And it's like you The air

Like it's air bubble It happens But you know how My trick is this So you know how like when Once it starts it can't stop Like the queefing Are you the type of person where you're like

If a little air comes out And then you're like I know 10 are following No No No but okay um yes let's just say yes yes all the time i should have tweeted this i should have emailed this question anonymously no but like i feel like i can't so once i feel like my first one i'm i'm

paralyzed because i know that if i move if i do anything it's coming yeah so i started taking the sheet wait what the sheet and like muffling my vagina I muffled a vagina here's the thing you're probably not the only person that has multiple queefs I do it also

when I go somebody learned something I also do it when I go to the bathroom because sometimes a little fart comes out you can't control it right

you wrap your hand with toilet paper you put it over your butthole and it's called the muffler that is the best thing I've literally ever heard thank you damn that means a shirt too

Becca is raising the roof I think that people are so this is common they're so we're so self conscious during sex like what's he thinking of my body

and what's he thinking of my queefs and what's he thinking of you know whatever and i think like you know you know what he's in bed with you he's really attracted to you he's so excited to be having sex with you you think that because you queefed or you think that you gained a pound or you did something funny that he's like gonna leave no men don't really care no not at all i mean hopefully you're with a guy who like gets it like that happens you know um that leads us to our next question which is like what is he thinking when he is down there because here's the thing for lots of women it takes a minute oh you know what i mean 25 to 40 and so you're sitting right so you're sitting

there and you're enjoying yourself but is he thinking like oh my god can she just come already like what what is she thinking it depends on the guy if you're with if you're with a guy the right guy he's thinking this is so great i'm into it and um i hope i can they should feel honored they should feel honored that they get to pray that they get to uh bow at the um beauty of your you know what do you call it i hate that word what's a good word there isn't a freaking good word i don't even like on my show i'm like i hate saying vagina i'm not gonna say anything else but like he's so yeah but there are men who are like not fans like they're just not and those are not the guys that you want to be with like on loveline too like we're talking

about mike catherwood or like he's always like if you are a guy who doesn't like it you should be sent to syria if you don't like doing it and i've been with guys i just told a story about this as the storytelling thing i was like i i was with the guy once i was like what is the deal like what i finally said to him did he just not want to go down i was like what is it i mean i gave him three options i was like so we've been dating for like nine months like so it was long distance so okay i realized that you don't often perform oral i'm just curious like a do you think i don't like it b you're not sure exactly like what to do or what i like or three you're not that into it and he's like i guess i'm just not that into it i was like i'm not that into you so it is true

that just like some women don't like going down and guys some men don't like it either but i hope he's thinking like what can i do to please her and i get so many emails and calls about that guys are like what could i do how can i be better at oral sex and i think that women we're so we're looking at the clock like it's been 10 minutes about and hopefully you're with someone that you can both feel really comfortable and settle in and you know okay let it happen the great hair debate what are we supposed to do with the hair right like is the bush back is that like i don't know i well here's the thing i think we do have we have some older listeners we have younger listeners i think everyone's kind of wondering like what does everyone else's vaginas look like

and i because you know when you're dating right you don't want to scare off people like what are you supposed to do can you tell us please like what what is our question jj gonna look like god i mean i think i think that you trim for sure shave trim and i think nothing or like like a landing strip is what is still what people are doing these days right and um you just i i think but also whatever you feel comfortable with like if you are happy rocking whatever you're rocking then a big old bush if you want the big old bush and you're like a bush is back do it like i don't like to say that this is like that but i i do think that what the norm is is that you know people are taking care of their trimming their shaving they're taking it all off which to me is like kind of

easier and i also got lasered all of it i get lasered it's the most amazing thing ever because i'm like but i didn't get it all lasered because i was like well what if the push comes it's like 10 i'm like what if the push does come back i want to push which i i hope never happens but i have a little bit of like yeah a little room for growth room for growth exactly i do not but whatever but i think and also i think you might be with a partner who's like you know what i think it'd be hot if you took it all off or you have to strip so just you know discuss it but also just do what feels good to you okay someone asked um what if you're having sex and you kind of start to smell yourself okay so um if you start to smell yourself and it's like a an odor that you're not

used to typically it could mean that you have an infection it could mean that like a bacterial infection or a uti so common and um or you might you know you might need to like go to shower or something but if you're clean and it's like a weird you know a smell that's not normal to you then you might have an affection. So just go to the doctor. What if, because listen, vaginas have a scent. Yes, they do. And so is it strange for you to be having sex

and then smell that vagina scent? I don't think that that's strange. It's only strange if it smells like what it always smells. You're like, that's my vagina. Right. So that's good. But if it's like, oh, that's an odd-smelling vagina, then there's a problem.

And I think I get emails a lot or calls also on Love Life from guys who are like, what do I do? It smells weird. It's like, you should just tell her. Tell her you were listening to Sex with Emily and, babe, I'm worried about you. Like I love This is not usually

Like I love going out on you I love it being with you But But something's a little off Oh my gosh If a man ever I would be mortified I would die

We would all die You'd be mortified If he said nothing And then it was just like This big elephant in the room Right Like your big stinky vagina A big smelly elephant

You would hope That you could smell Your own self too Yeah I mean check it out Make sure that you're clean too Before like I always like

You know do the wipe up Before I'm with someone I try to go to the bathroom Greatest thing ever Right Baby wipes Baby wipes Carry them in your bag

There's all these like Femme wipes too Make sure they don't A little lavender wipe Yeah Like just do a little something Okay We do have some young listeners

Okay And we got a lot of emails That just said How do I know When I should be having sex What is sex gonna feel like For the first time Okay

That's a great I actually just did a show On this Our virgin show We just did a virgin show That's coming out Oh that's great Yeah so they should check that out

On Sex with Emily But it's God what you expect The first time I mean It's You're not gonna see Like rainbows and unicorns

Probably disappointment yeah it's not going to be everything that you you think it's correct up to be um your partner's not expecting you to be perfect and to know every single move because it's your first time and hopefully if it is your first time that it's with someone that you trust someone that you you know at least know well enough to know their character they're not going to make you feel bad about yourself you know because it is a chart let's talk as women right i mean it's it's a charged thing like you always remember your first like you don't remember like the first time like you went on a bike ride or like the first time you did like you're like sex you remember so i would

make sure you're making a good choice about who it is don't be pressured into it and um but when you do decide you know there could be some pain there might be bleeding although there is a hymen myth that you know only like less than half of women bleed the first time so a lot of women like i didn't believe so i'm not a virgin like that's just a total myth like so yeah half of women do so because you might tear it in other ways and just um just kind of go and be in the moment and um you know might be painful might you know but you're probably not gonna have an orgasm but you're probably not going to see fireworks, but, um, I think go slow. If you experience any pain, let your partner know. And, um, again, just hopefully you're with someone that you feel

good about. You trust. Ooh. Okay. Um, what's a G spot and how do I know mine exists? What's it supposed to feel like? How does it work? Oh God. This is a whole, this could be, this has been a whole episode. Um, okay. Your G spot is a called Grafenberg Grafenberg spot actually against the the doctor who actually named it years ago who found it he discovered how did he discover yeah what the heck was he doing so the g-spot is about two inches inside your vagina so it's like uh it's it's in the anterior wall of your vagina so if you stick two fingers inside in a come hither motion going like towards your belly button okay towards your belly button it's about two inches inside and you'll feel like a rough kind of feels like a walnut shape and that

is your g-spot why is it there what it's just you know what that's a really good question it's just it's from i don't even it's like an appendix you don't really need it exactly well like the clitoris too i mean you know 8 000 nerve endings like the only reasons that clitoris exists is for you know pleasure yeah so the g-spot but the problem with the g-spot is it's so elusive is that so many women don't find it like during intercourse they think well why do i not have one and so does everyone have one everyone pretty much has one or they could find one i mean there's some women like you're like i can't find it it's nowhere but for a lot of women who've never found it and they've had sex a lot like i don't understand or i've tried it so how you find it is

first of all it's great to be turned on and to be aroused because it's more likely to swell and um all the you know blood will rush to that area so typically if you can have a clitoral orgasm you can knock that out and you'll be more aroused but also you can either stick two fingers inside you you can use a toy and you just start it's like a um it's not it's like a kind of you put pressure on it like with fingers or you can you could do it with a penis or a toy and then a lot of women can orgasm typically it feels when you get to the right spot like you're gonna pee but you're not kind of like kettles but you actually can have an orgasm but i have to say that person my personal story is that i never found mine during sex like i just i was like i

don't have one i'm one of those women and i went to work like i you know i think that the most especially for the virgins too the most important thing you can do which i i meant to mention her is, is, is to spend time figuring out your own body and what makes yourself feel good. And, and it could take you time. Like I was looking for my juice pop for like years, but then I really focused on it for like three months. Cause I was like, I'm really, you like went on a walk. No, I did.

Like I moved to San Francisco and I was, I went on a what? You went on a walkabout to find your juice. I literally, like, it was like a mission. I was like, I quest. Cause I was like, I've had sex. What's the deal. And, and this is what I, you know, it really was later in life. And I was like, God, I got to find it.

And so I had toys. I read all the books. I used lube and I'm just like patient with myself. oh that's and then you figure out where it is and then when you're having sex with a partner you can move in that way so you know where it is i mean some women are just like boom i found it but for a lot of women it takes work and it might take you some time julia roberts should have done that on eat pray love should have been eat pray exactly no i have a friend i've told this on my show but in college she's like i've never had an orgasm and she had an internship somewhere

and she spent every day for 30 days she's like i'm just gonna find it and she did like that's like the 27th day wow she was like i did so some women it's easier some women it's not but i say it's worth looking for worth looking isn't it bs that we have to do all this i know because guys are like guys are like i have a penis like my four-year-old nephew like can basically like he already gets it i know you know it's so unfair i'm not saying he jerks off right right but he's like it's like unbelievable he's not gonna have to do this when he's like 30 years old we're so complicated we're so complicated and for men they're like so when you say what's the guy I'm thinking, he might be thinking too, can she show me what she likes?

Because I'm not sure what I'm doing. Because everyone is different. Yeah, we're so much more complicated with what we like, especially sexually. Exactly. Like his last woman, like the last girl he was with, like, you know, more mouth and more fingers. This one hates fingers. Like, we're all different.

So once you have one figured out, we just change because we're like that. We're women. We get to, like, change our minds and change what we like. I love that. Screw with men. Exactly. There's a lot of rumors about having a baby. It stretches out your vagina.

Your sex is never the same. Can you talk to our mamas out there About how they are supposed to Attend to their Vaginas after bed I'm telling you They are a miracle And here's the thing

In France for postnatal care We work with this company Called InControl And it looks like a rabbit vibrator But it's actually an electrostimulator That you put inside you And it's a vibrator and a medical device In a way

but it does your kind of exercises for you and it's part of the that's what I do and that's why they're so strong and you use my app and I do them and it's like you just put it into like stimulation and it just does it you don't barely have to do anything so it's pretty cool but you just lay there and you put inside you and it's got

this electric it's called in control on my website it's called pour moi in control the banner or something and it's um it's the most amazing thing because I had my app because I was like this is because all my friends who have kids are like why am I peeing like why I don't enjoy sex anymore and so it's because kegels but if you rather you buy if you buy the in control or you just do them

on your own i promise you it takes like a month which is five minutes a day which is not yeah that's that much that's very fast okay really fast results so i would say after childbirth you gotta you gotta do it because you literally you have stretched all your muscles and they are you know you're like peeing you're just it's not the same so you got to put them back together and you got to keep you got to keep doing them and also for the g-spot question same thing is that when I started um doing more kegels too I was able my let's just say my g-spot was much easier to find this is so the g the kegels are just it's the answer I know it's the green juice of your vagina literally that is so true and I feel like people don't everything just goes back to kegels

it does it's weirdly it does okay that's why you gotta go to kegel camp yeah okay next question couple more is it normal to squirt what should you do when it happens the first time you're hooking up with someone acknowledge it ignore it keep on keeping on um is it normal i mean i would say a lot of women do and again from the g-spot what's the squirting yeah can we talk about yes we can we absolutely also men think it's cool because of porn i'm so confused okay so 10 years ago nobody was really asking about squirting at all they were like when i started like oh you know they were talking more about other things but it is because of porn and i think a lot of guys find it you know really hot if you can squirt and there's all these like things that you could

teach yourself to and you know you probably can if you sit you put enough pressure on it once you find your g-spot and you want to go there but but wait why does hitting the g-spot make you score like what is the so it's the okay so the fluid that comes out people like is it your because now there's like a big debate like it's right it's urine and she's peeing on me so it's from the periurethral glands the the fluid is what comes out but there are like traces of urine in it but it's um it's it's different fluid comes from a different place but it's you know yeah it might have it's a different thing and women can squirt without having an orgasm and you can also like have an orgasm and squirt but a lot of women just like squirt and it happens and i think

like just keep you know i think it's he might say that's really hot or you know she could just say wow i just squirted but i don't think it's anything to be embarrassed again it's just like the queen it's like the other side of the queef this is more fun maybe but it just happens yeah and guys that's why there's all these like videos like to learn how to squirt there's like courses right oh my god okay um i'm just gonna start peeing and be like oh my god i squirted there was more urine it smells like piss but it's it's squirt juice or whatever i don't even know like whatever it is i'm hot bye um okay last one of our anonymous questions but actually this this question we got about 20 questions of the same type of question um and but i want to read

this person's in particular she said my boyfriend of five years can't give me an orgasm um and this echoed what a lot of people said which was i can't have an orgasm which makes me uninterested in sex which makes me then turn down my person all the time and i do you know i have sex just because and i don't want to have to keep saying no help okay and this was a lot of in various ways asked the same exact this is such a good question so the most important thing is that so my boyfriend can't give me an orgasm nobody's giving you an orgasm the most important thing i want to say to these women is that you have got do your work like figure out your body yourself and i'm telling you i'm like i'm telling you to spend time masturbating like it's pleasure like i'm not saying like you

gotta go like do your taxes it's like and and here's the thing like again it might not happen right away but take your phone out of your room unless you want to watch porn or maybe on your computer whatever you want but like make a time that you're like i'm going to sit here and i'm going to think sexy thoughts or read erotica or watch whatever it is it turns yourself on and you just start like playing with yourself like you seduce yourself you know you think about you know use lube and use toys toys are amazing oh my god toys are so under i mean people aren't using toys instant orgasm instant orgasms i have this toy the womanizer is amazing it's like the 60 second orgasm but i would say first try on your own because once you figure out your own body then

you'll be able to explain to your partner what you want and and so for someone again it just happens the first time or it happens when they're riding a bike when they're like five which i that never happened to me either but um yeah that's why it's because you they have not spent the time learning their bodies and they're just thinking that magically he's gonna or she's gonna move some way it's gonna happen so this just tells me like do your homework um if you go to my site sexwithemily.com we it's 10 years of like and we probably have like hundreds of articles on like self-pleasure uh master may's masturbation month coming up like we do tons of this and it gives you like step by step, like what to do, what toys to use.

Another thing I left out, like just how do you increase libido was one of the things that people had kind of added into this. Okay. So no, that's another tough question I get asked. And also like, in other words, like mismatch libido is like my partner wants it more than I do. So libido is a really interesting thing. There could be a lot of factors why your libido can decrease.

And one of them, like one of the hidden like libido killers is birth control pill. Damn it. And they do not tell you that. Jack just went on the pill. Boom. Which one? Low, low estrin. Okay.

I mean, the thing is, it affects every woman differently. So if that's happening to you, and I do not know why your gynecologists don't tell you this, that that is a huge side effect. And so if you're finding that, like, I went on the pill and I don't want sex, you can switch it up. Like, go play with it. Try another one. Also, other medications, antidepressants, kills your sex drive. You know, any other kind, like a lot of other drugs.

But it can also be, you know, depression It could just be that, you know There could be some other stress, worry So when you're describing like a normal sex drive Is a normal person feeling like I need to have sex five times a day? Like what's a normal people's sex drive? Like a 17-year-old boy is

But, you know, most But like as a woman who's listening Like if we want to be What's a normal sex drive? What's a normal sex drive? There's no normal, okay I'm not Normal sex drive or how many times a week

Are you asking like should we have sex? How many times a week should we have sex? Well, that's another thing That's not There's no normal It's typically if you're with your partner and you both agree that like three times a week, five times a week is great or one time a week you're both totally satisfied, then that's great. But if one of you wants sex five times a week and one of you wants sex once, then you got to do some compromise. And what I also want to say to a lot of the women is that it's kind of like – you know when you don't want to go to the gym and it's like the last thing you want to do and then you're like, oh, I got a door and then you're like, okay, I put my shoes on.

And then once you get in, you get out the door. and the hardest part sometimes is getting out the door but once you get to the gym you're like okay i'm gonna go sex is a lot like that when you tell me you're stretching thing i was gonna say to you well maybe if you just aren't you kind of turned out from stretching because typically if you just start doing it you're like oh you're not gonna regret it to get into the you gotta get into it and whatever it is like also i think like think about like what turned you like sexy thoughts or whatever it is like erotica that like turns you on or maybe a lot of times words like for women yeah the brain is our brain like he could be texting you sexy things throughout the day like

i can't wait to see you tonight and like you have like it's like foreplay yeah yeah like i always say foreplay starts after the last orgasm so like whatever you can do to keep your mind there but you know it's gonna it's gonna ebb and flow we get stressed we get busy but just look into a lot of those those things i mean never regretted an orgasm you know there's like that shirt that's like never regretted a workout yeah exactly you're never like oh why'd i have sex you're of like why did i go to the gym that sucked never ever once you get there yeah yeah it's a really good what's um okay so the like a lady question was gonna be one thing but now i've in my mind it literally just switched and so i'm gonna ask every single one of us okay what is your thing

like she just said erotica you know your brain like what is your turn on becca's face is like no i'm just like i'm like damn it because i usually think of these beforehand you go first kelsey for me it's being warm like warm temperature like i know that's crazy but like for me i'm always like i only really am like super turned on if i'm like warm like i like to be under the comfortable thing and so what about naked stretching are you call but then you get your body heat going yeah you i just like i like a warm house i like a warm room i like candles like i like candle atmosphere all the things that are warmth wow for me yeah that's interesting um you know i like dirty talk i like like a sexy text or like hey i

was thinking about you and sexting and all that like the words get me turned on oh yeah i'm i'm 100 with you words for sure like tell me what this is another good thing for movement and i'm like little foreplay like tell them what you if you're like i don't know what to say like tell how hot it was last night and like name one specific thing that you remember like that was so hot when you blank or i like when you it's so easy just like little things that keep you going and feel your dirty i'm just like over here under the comforter so embarrassed like it's so warm wow okay every kind of it's all what has emily taught us which is just everybody everybody's different everybody so jack dirty talk dirty talk and then i don't know just seeing like your man

turned on right and like really really wanting you yeah it makes you feel sexy yeah i think that's what it is it's like when you feel i don't know like desired yeah when you're feeling really good about yourself then it's like well and we've talked about this so many times we're like what if he sees my cellulite what if it's like a guy if he's just so into you that nothing else matters and you're not worrying about your insecurities then i think that's like what is the sexiest thing that's true be present be in the moment like we're all we're as women like we worry so much and we just they're not noticing any of that stuff you know so i think we take ourselves out