LadyGang - Jac's Big Announcement (plus modern dating w/ U Up? podcast)

Episode Date: July 16, 2024

Joined by the brilliant voices behind the U UP? podcast, Jordana Abraham and Jared Fried, we discuss some trending modern couples to see what we can all learn from them, including Pookie and Jett, Bryan and Rachel, Selena and Benny and Selena and more. Plus, Jac has a Huge ANNOUNCEMENT years in the making. Check out our great sponsors!! Boll & Branch: Check out Boll & Branch’s Annual Summer Event with 20% off sitewide PLUS free shipping on your first set of sheets at BollAndBranch.com/ladygang  SKIMS: Shop the SKIMS Soft Lounge Collection at skims.com - After you place your order, select "LadyGang" in the survey and select our show in the dropdown menu that follows! Nutrafol: Get $10 off your first month’s subscription and free shipping at Nutrafol.com and use code "LGPOD" Away: Check out the new Softside Luggage at AwayTravel.com/ladygang  Progressive: Quote your car insurance at Progressive.com to join the over 28 million drivers who trust Progressive! Huggies: Get your baby’s butt into Huggies’ best fitting diaper! Huggies Little Movers. We got you, baby.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

well what is this welcome to the lady gang that's amazing say that again the lady gang things are about to change around here each week we catch up with hollywood's hottest girl posse kelty knight becca tobin and jack vanik hello hello hello welcome to the lady gang i am becca tobin here with jack vanik and kelty knight Hello. Hi, Fran. Kelty, it is July and you're in a black turtleneck like Steve Jobs. Tell us what's happening.

Well, it's a little early in the morning and I burnt my chesticles on the weekend doing my hobby gardening. So I just, but it's a crop. Oh, okay. So I'm still getting air. I'm still getting air through my belly. I hate that. What?

Turn on that crop? I hate a turtleneck crop. Really? Oh, my God. Your reaction was so visceral. That's so specific. I know. It really gives me the heebie-jeebies.

Why? Because you're covering, like, I don't know. I hate a turtleneck, but then the, I don't know. I don't know, guys. Oh, I love a turtleneck. I love a turtleneck. Something must have happened in a turtleneck crop to me at some point. Okay.

That I blocked out of my memory. I'm so sorry to trigger you like that this morning. Okay. In that case, it's time for... Good week. Yes, it is. Bad week. Oh, no.

I'd really like to go first. Take it away, Becca T. Okay. So I have bad news. Do you guys remember when I got dengue fever? Yes. Okay. For those of you who are new to the podcast,

Zach threw me this beautiful pseudo-surprise week in Tulum for my 30th with like all my friends came in and they surprised me. it was the best time ever. We went to a restaurant that was outdoors and it's kind of jungle vibes in Tulum. And I got home and I was wearing a jumpsuit long, like a pant jumpsuit. And I guess mosquitoes literally made, had a rave inside the pant leg of my jumpsuit. I came home with like 40 mosquito bites. Within a couple of weeks, I was back in LA sick as a dog and nobody could figure out what was wrong with me. It was weeks and weeks and weeks. I finally saw an infectious disease doctor at cedars-sinai he's like that's dengue fever so that was brutal right well i was

just told by a headline that dengue fever is making its way it's through mosquitoes you get this right all the mosquitoes are being infected and they're in florida so they are on u.s soil there are cases of dengue fever on top of this being horrible news i was informed that it's the type of thing where the second time you get dengue fever it is very serious many are hospitalized and some die no so i am time for me to get jack time to get out that old list we have of becca replacements time to get our affairs in order you know what i mean like what if you die from dengue fever well it was pronounced dengue what did i say um it is it is like really truly terrifying and i get eaten alive by mosquitoes i have been starting to do a full research on

the greatest mosquito repellents that are out there i'm same did you see mine no well oh well yours was like the remedy for the remedies. Yes. Yes. Yes. I did see yours, but what I wanted to write back to you was it's quite simple. It's, it's just cortisone cream. I was loving everybody's very creative things. They're like, if you rub a McFlurry all over your body, it was like toothpaste. I'm like, I, I don't know, guys. I don't know. Um, but at that point, if I'm using a remedy it's too late the dengue has hit my bloodstream and it's over yeah game mother over okay my good week is um i i don't know where this came up or how it came up or if i saw it on instagram i have literally no memory because i'm an ancient person um you know when people say

freeballing yeah you know like we're just gonna freeball it or raw dog it you know it's like whatever i'm so annoyed it's always about the male genitalia yeah yeah so now instead of freeballing we're gonna call it freevolving oh disgusting so it's like the snail trails just run free you know who would be great at that me yeah you are great at that you were you freevolve in denim you freevolve in denim revolving and she free evolves in like see-through leggings yes my body teacher's like happy baby i'm like happy to you you can see my happy tuesday morning to you so we're gonna free evolve free evolving i love that free evolving actually can't well i first of all i love that second of all can

i go next because mine kind of has to do with my vulva yes my good i'm gonna start with my good week and then i'll whatever okay kelty you don't need to explain your whole life um my good week is that, um, a few years ago on the podcast, the lady gang girls defined me as success coach. Yeah. And they're like, your job should be, well, I think I actually success consultant, success consultant. And I was like, I just want to help people be successful. Like I have all of this random knowledge that can just help you be better. And Rachel Edwards, who is a member of the lady gang community, she took this to heart and she wrote me six months ago. And she was like, Hey, I'm going in for my wedding dress fitting. I'm going to send you photos and I need you to

tell me exactly what to tell the lady. And I was like, okay. And so this week it was wedding fitting. She's like, okay, the fittings this week, she's been updating me. And I've been like, okay. Um, so she was like, I know you said you need to tuck it under the butt. And I don't know what that is. So I'm like screenshotting things I'm drawing on. What do you want? So then she sent me a video. I was so proud. She's like, Hey Kelty. Okay. So here's the deal. I know what needs to be done. And then her friend like pulled the under the butt to do like the little butt thing. And then she was like, but I'm concerned about the front. And then I drew a thing. Her dress is stunning. It's like, you know, when someone picks the perfect dress for their body,

I'm like, she's, she's so beautiful. And then we just put the butt and I was like, you know what? I just, I'm so happy that I can be of service to the lady gang. Cause I really do know how to fit a gown. Yeah. And, um, so if you need me, I'm here. Okay. Bad week. Um, so I was cleared for sex at like three months after my histo and I had sex twice, a little bit of a gentle situation and it was wonderful. It was a, it's a new feeling for sure, but like wonderful. Then on Saturday, I had sex with Chris and I was like, I'm going to be full Kelty. I'm going to give you the full fantasy you know what i mean like i want i want nipple tassels not nipple tassels but like let's multiple positions you we flip around it was like the sabrina you know it's like sabrina carpenter

the like flipping on the positions and the jello you know um anyway so i was on top because that's like how they say you're supposed to have sex for a while after you have that because you're like in control and then he flipped me over and you know how when you're having an orgasm you're like it's not painful, but you kind of like feel like a clenching. Yes. So I was confused because this is all new. Am I, am I having an orgasm or is this the worst pain in my life? And I, so, you know, we finish and then I keeled over in pain and then I was like, nope, it's the worst pain in my life. I was in so much pain that my hands froze in like bird position. Chris put me in the bathtub, gets the Tylenol with codeine left over from my thing. I was like, and I need a Xanax. He takes

the Xanax. We call the doctor and he's like, if you're still bleeding in two hours, I was bleeding everywhere. There's a big circle of blood on the bed. He's like, if you're still bleeding in two hours, go to the ER. So anyway, the worst pain I've ever felt in my life, because when you feel pain like this, you usually are on drugs. Like they've drugged you and then you, anyway. So I went to the doctor. I tore my vaginal cuff having sex. The vaginal cuff is the little flip that dating. I pulled a stitch. So then I had to have another thing where they put your legs in the stirrup and then they take the silver nitrate and they essentially cauterize or cost, cost, cauterize the hole that you've made in your own vaginal cup. And now it feels like I'm three

weeks post-op again. Can't work out. Can't have sex. Oh my God. So did you still have a stitch that was not healed? Yeah. The stitches last like eight or nine months because they can't heal in the moistness of your vagine internal stitches take so long to heal oh it wasn't like a stitch it was like the stitch and then the skin had popped and like made scar tissue and anyway but my lovely dr seedhoff i'll just say one more thing is that like before i've never had this before with any gyno maybe everyone has but you're in the stirrups and before he like sticks the thing in you like the duck to like open up your vag he does a beautiful little sweet inner thigh caress where he's just like i'm here i'm here well he's like it's like when a masseuse moves

around a table they leave a hand so that you know he knows where you are so it's not just i thought that was very sweet i've never had that before okay i don't know a caress just seems weird maybe caress isn't the terminology not the right word it was just like i'm here i'm here here we go. Okay, Jack. Okay, well, we saved the best for last because my good week is I got a f***ing house. Jared and I finally bought a house. I didn't think this moment would ever come in our lives. It is so exciting. It is the house for us, and it's going to be a lot of work. There's a lot of reno that we have to do, but I'm so excited for this point in our lives. I'm more excited than our wedding, to be honest, and I'm just so happy. It's a better feeling. It is. I'm like,

this is a bigger moment anybody can get married it's also more committed i mean you guys own a home together a divorce after a marriage without a home is easy easy peasy you just take your air fryer and you leave which we'll learn more about later in this episode this is a tease jack can we do like a whole house episode and like yeah okay i'm making a list i have a lot to say about the house there's a lot that has transpired but i'm so so happy and like i've been very like um um, I don't know, scared about the process. I'm like, is this the right house for me? But I feel so comfortable here. I know it's the right house for us. So I'm very excited about it. I'm so happy. Thank you. I know. I'm really happy. It's such a big deal. I'm so proud of you. You

save the money down payment. Like this is great. Yeah. And we did it all ourselves. We didn't have any help, which is like pretty much unheard of, especially in California. So I'm very proud of us. My quick bad week is that yes, I've been talking about mosquitoes because our house has it's like a garden house the guy before us loved to garden and it's like it's basically like a tropical situation going on yeah which is so many mosquitoes i'm allergic to mosquitoes i'm having an issue so like i need to figure out this problem before dengue gets here and i i die as well with becca and kelty is doing lady gang alone which she would love to do no yeah number one no standing water you got to get rid of the standing water if there's water anywhere that's sitting that's it

number two go get some lavender plants you like in the pots mosquitoes hate lavender oh number three literally never kill a spider keep all the spiders you can yeah there's lots of spiders and we had a fountain that was full of standing water so yeah we're starting we're hoping for the best but like it's that fountain it's that fountain and you can have someone come spray anyway all right we'll do it mazel tov i'm so happy for you jack when we come back the stars of the you up podcast are here for all your dating needs now back to the lady gang our guests today are here to make sure you don't die alone she is the co-founder of one of the most important media companies on the planet betches and he is the hilarious comedian with a netflix special 37 and

single and together they love all the things that we love dating shows gen z hating us and podcasting With their top-rated modern dating podcast, You Up, please welcome to the Lady Gang, Jared Fryde and Jordana Abraham. First of all, congratulations, Jared, on having a Netflix comedy special. Like, that is so baller. That's really hard, and you can't fake that in Hollywood. No, I appreciate it. I do go by my stage name, Jared Freed, on these specials.

Fryde's kind of better. conversation i'm jared fried i i i don't want to confuse the audience so i am jared free but i am so happy to be here with you guys i've only heard great and wonderful things and i met jack in a pool in la as people do as people meet sometimes and we were discussing before coming on the air that do you bring up meeting someone in passing years ago and it's funny like you know it kind of goes to the premise of our podcast like Jordana and I we talk about dating we don't know anything more than we know ourselves and we were talking about like the awkwardness of like we've met but we don't know each other does that person remember and it's like generally if I feel something

someone else feels something and I think like you know Jack being like how do you bring it up and I'm like yeah I feel just as awkward as you you know I'm like she probably doesn't remember me it's like who's that chubby jew i met the pool in la i don't know well this is what happened which is so funny because i think it's the only rooftop pool that i have been to in la in the past like 10 years like i don't really leave the west side and we were there because we were visiting two of my friends who are like super fans of you so they came up to talk to you and they're like oh my god it's jared it's jared fried it's your friend you know him by my real name jared fried yeah and so so they did like they did the creepy thing where they like went up to you and then they

kind of like pulled me into the conversation they're like she has a podcast i'm like don't do this to me like this is already embarrassing enough and i'm like he's not gonna he's gonna think i'm some like joe schmoe like whatever when someone says that and you guys know this when someone says first of all it's not creepy at all to come say hello to me in a pool you up to me any body of water hot tub pool uh lake shower on shower shower just stride on up confidently um but and then usually it's like someone will be like she has a podcast and then the person's like like yeah i got a podcast and then it has like one review and it's from their mom when they when they were like she has and then you mentioned the lady gay i was like oh i know

this show i've been trying to message you guys for years you don't take my messages oh i forgot that part i think i was just so embarrassed in the whole conversation that i was like he he thinks i'm like some loser i'm just gonna forget this whole encounter um but it was i mean i remember you and that's you know we're talking about it it's like how do you bring it up i don't know just pretend that neither of you met in in this way we bring it up and talk about how much we hate ourselves for five minutes while we go down memory lane you know that's the way to do it exactly perfect i love it so much well the podcast is so successful um before we get the lady gang we're talking about no it's so it's definitely pool worth

pool mention worthy no your podcast is so successful but each of you have your hands in so many things and jordana i wanted to ask you like what is it like like running the internet for people like what how do you what's your calendar look like um well i don't really run the internet as much as i used to uh when we started now we have a really good team that um does all the work while i just benefit um nice no there's a lot there's a big team that that does um you know all the things we do like the instagram and the newsletters and other podcasts and things like that um but this is definitely my biggest passion at betches is this podcast and podcast in general so it's been really cool to build it um and then to be really able to like super focus on it in the

past seven years how many years we've been doing this six and a half something like wow yeah coming on seven yeah do your friends constantly just send you memes and stuff like hey this would be good for you and you're like i i am meme yes and i i don't know how to i still don't know how to um reject someone like nicely i mean jared sends me memes that sends us memes too sometimes we use them though but it's very i think it's very hard to say no um like because you can't what are you supposed to say like this isn't funny you know you just this is not for us do your parents do your parents pitch you often because that my dad pitches anyone and everything ideas about any industry really totally my mom does she's been pitching like menopausal betches for years

all the content for people post menopause and i'm like i don't think you understand how a business runs but or like how a demographic works but um she's been trying she's also a gynecologist so she's been like she's been where are all the the menopause gynecologist i'm like i don't think it's not we don't just make content for every specific niche person that ever existed just because they're annoying like you um unfortunately uh that that content is over here at the lady gang yeah we have some i'll redirect her yeah let her know let your mom know that i recently removed my uterus and i can't stop talking about it so she wants a hip new like hysterectomy ish kind of vibe like we recently went through our bad comments like in itunes and somebody was like

we get it kelty your new personality is your hysterectomy there were many that's how much that's how much mama abraham should come on over and get the content she is desiring yeah honestly she would she might have written that comment i don't know she's like so mean um wow okay all right so today i have prepared a show for us for your expertise i have broken it into two sections the first section is talking about some celebrity couples and getting your thoughts on them and what you think what these people should do in this situations the second is direct from the secret Lady Gang Facebook club. I have brought in insane relationship stories and we want to hear what you guys think. Okay. So are you ready? First of all, I would love to know what you think of the Brian

and Rachel divorce from the bachelor. So Rachel and Rachel's a friend. So, um, you know, we have be nice to her um but you know uh listen she so this will be a totally fair conversation unbiased unbiased conversation a man who wants spousal support i'm sure there will be tons of you know love here on the lady gang podcast well have you guys been following it because like something new comes out every single day it's like an onion i i've been updated because i i do the bachelor podcast with the betches universe i um so i was recently updated with all you know some of the bad i and i'm a huge bachelor fan um generally so i know that these two got married from the show rachel and brian

brian was the chiropractor they were loud kissers um that was like the whole story on them and then they kind of like went off into like bachelor at bachelor kind of like nation stuff and then they end up getting they end up moving in together and right and then getting a divorce and then they own a home together but now he is saying he only makes sixteen thousand dollars a year and needs spousal support and she's paying for like the mortgage the upkeep the taxes and now what you know and it seems as though from my perspective rachel has tried to kind of keep like this as civil as she could but now it seems that the pr people have got involved to try and win the uh the public kind of opinion and try to kind of embarrass smoke this thing out it seems as a just

a consumer of you know pop culture stuff can i ask how you only make sixteen thousand dollars a year if you have three hundred and seventeen thousand followers if you have 317 000 followers i think and they just throw money at you like to us up to us like a hundred thousand dollars at least right and his whole thing too was like the only thing that he owns is an air fryer like they kept talking about this air fryer i mean air fryers are great jack i know no i know a good air fryer is priceless and he like the other day he posted because i'm uh jared every night before bed i read the bachelor subreddit it's like what i do to like calm myself down so i know the ins and outs of like every single thing that's going on with every contestant so i've been getting the update but

now he's like he like posted about the air fryer recently on his instagram stories like he's like leaning into it but i think the whole he's just trying to get more money and she's just like dude go yourself kind of a thing well the craziest thing is that i read this article where he was like well i just supported her and she went off and she was always busy with her big job on extra tv i gotta be honest with you everyone i've been a correspondent on television um it's not the money grab that you think it is like by the time you pay your agents and your gas bill from driving to the west side to the sony lot every day like it wasn't like she was like all of a sudden you know a movie star like she was like an elevated news personality like she made

some money but it wasn't like you know enough to be supporting him in his life too like oh my god i feel bad for her i think the only like the only takeaway from the story that i have is just like i don't know is chiropractor a real job well that was a big one that was a big question i feel like came out of this it just shows how like emotional all relationships are these two are willing to publicly embarrass themselves to beat the other person and that is like what it boils down to like he for a man to come out and be like you know it's not a very you know in the classic manly way to come out and go i make sixteen thousand dollars i need the help for my wife like that is like you know maybe for some people that's like a hero but i'm just like that's not that like

counterintuitive for any man out there so he is so willing to try and get money from her and win that he doesn't give a crap about what the next woman thinks of his sexual ability which is often connected to how much you make and how powerful you are in your career so he is literally not worried about his penis which shows me they must really hate each other so or he really needs the money right or he needs the money which i don't we don't believe with 300 000 so or you know so that's really all it tells me is that this man has given up future to try and get money out of his current enemy which is his ex-wife it's almost flattering yeah yeah i agree i mean i can't believe that she didn't meet a stand-up integrous man on a reality show where people compete

for love fame and instagram influence like it's just so mind-blowing that he didn't turn out to be prince charming to me i need everyone to stop thinking that anybody from these shows is going to have a quality relationship or be i don't know a quality human i don't know have you have you seen sean and katherine i love them there was the first season i ever watched and i was like i always thought that every season would end up like that and then to this day nobody well that was before people got famous from the show like that was when those were the that was the golden era of bachelor nation all you got was an us weekly cover and that's it and then you go back to your regular job yeah yeah and you go back to fighting fires like ryan wasn't ryan the firefighter

with trista yeah see he's got integrity okay my other favorite my other favorite couple um is not celebrity adjacent uh pookie and jet i i don't know why i am i mean she's pregnant now which is so exciting um but everywhere i go i'm like pookie and jet and people are like who but like everyone knows them right yeah yeah we're familiar jordana has has some opinions on pookie you're in the fan club jord what are your opinions no i i guess it's very unpopular i think they're like very icky i don't know i don't like them i would i would agree i think the ick factor though is why people love them you know what i mean i think the cringe they match each other's cringe so they deserve one another in my eyes i think that they are equally as attracted to one

another in my eyes which is truly mind-blowing but yes it is a true love and it's just like you know and it's like you got to meet your freak like match your freak like they just do to becca's point it's always it's you know i call it the dave matthews band phenomena uh dave matthews band is a good band it's the fans that suck yeah you know and that's um really kind of the pookie and jet thing it is pookie and jet to me are a couple i would talk about behind their back i'd be happy for them um it is a couple that i think he's i think he's actually like not really good for people to see he has no backbone he only prays at her altar it is not a real relationship the fact that people say this is what a man should be is actually like

embarrassing to any actual normal couple that has two opinions and comes to some sort of rational negotiation in every relationship there's no negotiation she is a queen he buys her everything she wants um and he just brings money to her feet and she says how great he is for doing that so you know to me it's unreal you know we are a dating podcast that deals in reality which sometimes people don't want to hear people want cinderella that's why they watch the bachelor one that's right that's why they watch pookie and jet they are not a real couple they are real to them good for them if i had endless amounts of money i mean like he's like got like all these degrees he's got a great job i'm sure he's great but like that's not most people's realities i

think it's what people want their reality to be and then feel bad about their own reality i don't understand how how they get away i mean we've talked about this before on our show like the the worst jared was saying the worst thing you could be on the internet is rich um awful but they seem to defy that rule because they just keep showing everyone all their money like in this kind of tacky way and everyone loves it the second worst thing you can be is a man with an opinion and he has not right so it evens it out so it evens it out right yeah you're right but also go ahead jack no i was gonna say it's like you know nothing about them like that's all they show is their little outfit videos like i need to know what's happening

behind closed doors and they don't do like podcasts or anything i don't think like i don't i haven't heard him talk more than like get on that podcast part of the betches universe get it nobody's listening they're doing the tiktok smartest thing you could do tiktok you do one thing yeah do it well and you beat that drum and you hit that algorithm hit it hard if you do anything else you'll lose your algorithm you'll lose the audience you it's not a home of creativity tiktok is the home of following the thing that repetition do the same thing every time and do not ruin it by bringing in your real problems so stay in your lane stay in your lane i think they're like aspirational cinderella and i guess if we if if the fans were like oh yeah that's

cinderella we know it's like disney i would like the fans more but they don't it's usually like this is how a man should be no instagram no tiktok he should never say anything that's remotely negative ever you know i know i think the reason people still like them is so usually i'm just thinking of the aspirational couples you know usually you could you could wave some money around at me and i would say you know like whatever it takes you know like we always tell women on this that are single that listen to the podcast like just get the jet who cares how old he is how whatever he is like go for the money because like not the jet not the actual jet yes flying jet and so we're like just get it get your get your jet get your things and love fades you know like it

doesn't really matter true love fades but money state is forever on podcast because none of us your uterus is gonna go love will fade get your handheld fan and get ready to sweat yeah none of us married for money so it's like the grass is always greener but the thing that pookie provides to me is actually it contradicts that belief because i say there's no amount of money that would actually get me in bed with that jet oh my god so i think that there is just a and it has nothing to do with his appearance it has everything to do with that he's a doormat i mean he truly is i don't know how many women want to rip that type of man's clothes off well there's two other things those two other things they have too is they both have great hair and look good in

clothing yeah and that's important for social media like if someone looks good in clothing and has great hair they generally are doing okay like i'm the shape hot take you're right yeah i'm the shape of a tissue box so like i don't look great in clothing a lot of the times but this guy he wears a jacket well he wears a button down well he's in like very fashionable clothing she is basically a mannequin at macy's she can fit into anything which a lot of women like i remember i was dating a girl and i was like why do you like she was like i follow this woman with like 10 000 followers and she was showing me this woman and i was like why do you follow her like what she goes i just love her vibe and style and i was like and it was just such an unrelatable

thing to me like i've never followed a man for his style like i it's just never been a thought to me like oh my god johnny depp he wears those you know he wears those blankets really well like i'm not gonna like brad yeah there's like no aspiration there is aspiration in a woman who's like who can really wear anything off the rack i think yeah an off the rack woman okay wait i i have to get to our real dating because i have we have the the king and queen of you up here but i want to give you one dealer's choice to uh jared and jordana it's a live you want to talk about olivia and christian and the uh i wore the wedding dress for my husband brad pitt and his 30 year less wife or selena and benny blanco you choose i'm a big selena fan i'm gonna divert to jordana

go for it big selena fan i the first one i actually don't know who that is yeah i don't know who that is olivia colpo and christian mccaffey got married and there's like all the thing about in her vogue interview she was like i wore this very like the dress was very modest and she was like because that's what my husband wanted and i'm interesting it was it why it's a choice i mean that's the least pookie and jet story you know that's what i'm saying it's like the opposite yeah jet would never never there'd be cutoffs all over that she's wearing lingerie baby right jets in the back knitting the dress for pookie of her dreams you know yeah okay selena and benny i think this is the real thing i do too i love them i love them

this is it right like them both um yeah i think they're great i love selena i still you know i still think about her and justin bieber like any other loser on the internet like every day um yeah all the time and so i've been waiting for her to like you know find the one and move on i'm like very very excited for her i don't know she seems really happy you know i think that benny blanco has enough he has a little bit of jet in him where he like worships the ground that selena walks on but then he has a backbone and he's like kind of an asshole but like and then has his own shit going on like i think he just has the little little bit of jet that you need in a man yes did you see his his his architectural digest oh my god amazing what is it yeah like they showed his

house in in architectural digest is that people call it ad i don't know whatever um they showed his house and it's like so cool yeah and he's like this is a super big soft sofa so when my nieces and nephews come over we just snuggle here and i was like oh my god i love you he seems like like a normal good guy i don't know i love him that's like the guy you marry benny i didn't know that he was like i didn't know what he was successful for you know i he kind of came into my universe just via like kind of tiktok and food stuff and then i found out he's like written for like every pop star ever like right isn't that what he's like every yeah he's like super producer rich rich rich rich rich i think that's what i think that's what we want

on the internet is someone with like their quiet career and then they this is like them at their most them when they're having fun and i think that's where he hits the nail on the head and it's like he her she's great and we love her because pop star and everyone sang songs in their living room and thought they were a pop star once and she you know but then she also like has boobs she's not like you know like she's like a woman you know like i think that there's a relatability there and she was also single on the internet for a second so people saw her kind of struggle and then you see her with someone that is not her looks wise that like so it's all aspirational she got the doofy Seth Rogen that she's always wanted but he's successful and he

has money and never has to worry about him latching onto her career and then he gets aspirational woman queen you know the pookie and jet of it all it kind of fits things we want already I find Benny Blanco though, like kind of dead sexy. I don't know why. I do too. Confidence. And he's funny. He's really funny. If he was a chiropractor making $16,000 a year, you guys would not be saying this. Thank you, Becca, for saying it for me. No, ma'am. You are a jack of all people. You're the most, what is it called? He has a perm. I want all the men with perms that make sixteen thousand dollars to write in the lady lady gang jack's down i'm down i'm down i mean i've hooked up with worse you know but that's the thing like he's not like like i'm not saying he's

an ugly person like he's like fine enough he's yeah but he's guy you would have been friends with in high school yeah that you realized was there all along yeah and he went he is yes he is literally from a rom-com yeah he's from 13 going on 30 he's the mark ruffalo like there's no yes yeah selena i feel like just has that relatable quality of like she's hasn't always had it easy and love and like i don't know you still feel like weird about weird about the whole justin thing even as he's like now about to have a baby so i think that there's like a relatability and you know i you dated the guy who like didn't really treat you well you were on and off and then he kind of like winds up with a model and yeah it's the model aspect I think that if Justin

had ended up with somebody that wasn't like a perfect 10 we could all just get over it and move on but we've all been with men who have left us and then gone on to date someone prettier than us and that will haunt you until forever until your deathbed never literally never let it go we are selena yes we are all selena yeah okay when we come back ask the lady gang with experts you're listening to the lady gang all right we are back question number one this is anonymous from the lady gang group my mother-in-law is the overbearing type and this year for my birthday she gave me a can of beans chili seasoning and a recipe and when she gave it to me she said i'm gonna start giving you one of my recipes every time that way you can cook for my baby the way

i did number one this makes me feel like she thinks i need guidance taking care of quote her baby two she's not a good cook she's a stereotypical white lady with no seasoning half her recipes remind me of the great depression because they're weird gross foods that you'd only eat together for survival three who wants this as a birthday gift it's like happy birthday go cook my baby the food i made 30 years ago even though he's never once talked about this recipe or requested it am i wrong to be offended and annoyed i realize how bitchy i sound but am i wrong uh this is a tough one is it is it jared sounds so redeemable uh jared what's your dynamic with your mother like before we go on we need to know what we're working with this is highly relatable because i have a mom

with um who's i i would say with opinions that i that i like i like my mom and i like hanging out with her but i also know that like it's not not all the time i can walk out of the house and go we'll try again another time like my mom you know my mom with with no irony offered me my dad's week of ozempic and told me you know i needed it more than him this week so like i understand the idea of a mom saying things with care and love yes but in a way that is offensive so like i and i think what happens with sons and i've had this issue in my life is that i have the ability to go there's the at its core i know where it's coming from i don't think a lot of the in every relationship i've been in the mother daughter-in-law and you hear it from your married friends i'm not just

saying from my experience i asked my married friends i'm like what is it what's it like with your mom and your and your wife and they're like they literally like hands up they're like i don't know what to do so like if this if my wife came to me with the can of beans and was like look what you know to me the emailer has gone into like places where you can't disagree with her like like the way she's painted this picture which i don't think is it's her reality i'm not trying to like she feels i can't tell her how to feel but like i if i'm like imagining being her husband and being like well now i'm getting in trouble because my mom said this in a way that was shitty um she's trying to pass down knowledge of prior generations you know you know she's trying to like

listen trying to create a connection between her generation and the next by teaching things this is like as old as cave people times you know like let me show you how we did things when i don't think she has to make the you know the hobo thing that she's offered to make but i i don't know to me this is like one of those like you know like let's let's go to more serious things like this say thank you for the hobo recipe and let's move on you know like you never make it put the can of beans in the in the in the cabinet and can we not fight about this this is what we're fighting about i would like she's an old lady she doesn't know what the f**k she's talking about she needs someone to make fun of the mother-in-law with because if you could if you find someone to

make fun of the person with then you don't have to take them so seriously but if you're the only one in the whole family who like thinks this woman's weird right or offensive that's when you start to get like really mad because there's no one to just like take the edge off and and that's why it's the husband's job to be like making fun of her for you right so that you don't have to make fun of her so that we can all laugh behind her back right jordana you bring up a great it's two to tango though because i've been in this situation where i'm like she's a crazy bitch who gives a i would love that and and and my and and whoever i'm with is like you think it's okay for her to tell me that i have to take care of you and i'm like come to me a little bit i'll

come to you a little bit i'm calling my mom a crazy weirdo can you at least see that it came from somewhere of a good place look i'm getting fired up because i've been in this situation clearly right we have hit the nerve nerve dare i call it he's getting fried i yeah that's fried up that's my new merch fried up and then i'm gonna sell i'm gonna it's gonna say fried up on a handheld fan and we're gonna sell it to our menopausal listeners yes wow really tying it together there it is that's why they give you netflix specials so i but i i just think that sometimes these stories come in as like and i'm speaking as you know the one guy here i've just been in this situation where i'm like yeah this is totally ridiculous to can you a can of beans

for your birthday is the funniest thing i've ever heard like i would never stop talking about this I know it's also, it's happy. We have to have both, but I'm with Jordana. Both parties have to agree. This is ridiculous. Now let's discuss. Yeah. Yep. Exactly. Okay. Next number two. Hey guys, I'm feeling pretty bad about myself. A guy and I had some great conversations on Bumble and he wanted to FaceTime before our date during the FaceTime, he hangs up and ends up unmatching me with me on the app it just made me feel ugly i barely even talked to him and he insisted on calling in the middle of the night i wasn't prepared i guess i just want a vent i mean this guy sounds like a lunatic it's brutal is facetime before you date a thing now

like you got to check the goods so you don't get catfished or well let me can i help her a little bit to look at this from a different perspective because i am kind of you know jordana is like i did this last week no makeup rachel um no i i jordana is a great co-host because sometimes i for many reasons but because a lot of times i'm put in the position of like speaking from the side of the disgusting and like i i think with like with a with a email like this like i'm sorry this happened um let's the i let's start with facetiming before a date is a thing like um now what people want from a first date is very different you know this guy to me you got lucky it wasn't like not you know it's very easy to look at this and go he saw me thought not hot

enough won't go out with me like i i think that's like the easy yeah conclusion to come to there's many other to me there's a spectrum of conclusions that could have come to it could have been first of all it could have been we're not the match second of all if it's coming in the middle of the night to me this is a guy who's more likely to be looking for a quick hookup more than he is checking you out like the idea that you didn't have makeup on you couldn't do the math on what you'd look like on you know at the gala and what you'd look like on your you know your hamper days you know like you know everyone's got hamper days and gala days and women's spectrum is way wider than a man's so i i my hamper days are way closer to my gala days it's you know the look but i'm

saying he's not an idiot he knows what you look like via the pictures and so the idea that like you didn't amount to something is actually fraudulent and something that the internet promotes because it's an easy thing to like go to the streets with your torches to me it's more likely middle of the night he's probably moving towards sexual conversations you're not really giving you're asking about his family and if he has brothers and sisters and he goes to him because she's not going to give me the blow job i want very quickly and he bailed yeah and that's a more likely scenario to me than you weren't look good looking enough i just so if you can look at it from that perspective of like okay this wasn't opportunity missed because that's her the angle

of her email is opportunity missed it is actually um horrific date missed so i think she got lucky and and facetime's flush things out quickly you know so jordan i don't know if you know totally agree and i think what we do on our show um that's helpful for people is we teach them how to be like a better consumer of the other person on the other end so if i were her i she's it's the sad part to me is that she's taking this about like she's taking this as a sign she's ugly instead of saying like okay shouldn't have it late night facetime i'm not going to answer that that to me is a i'm now i'm a consumer of men i'm swiping on the apps i'm looking to pick one the person who's trying to FaceTime me late at night is not someone I'm going to be interested in and because

they're only going to be interested in hooking up and if I'm looking for a relationship that's not who I should be valuing in this way so we really just like that's what we try to do is make people better consumers on the apps which do feel like a little bit like commodified people do feel like but you can do that too that's sort of like you could own that and judge people in your own way to find out who's going to be a better match for you and to add to this if you're like someone who's getting asked to do a face time do it when you want it no man i've never had a guy say to me or i've never said as as a man myself i've never said oh she wouldn't face time with me i gotta move on what a loser like it's like no if i'm asking for a face that's not been you know i

always think of like presenting things to a jury of your peers and then like do it like this is like a fun exercise if you went if this person went to a jury of their peers and was like and this person wouldn't facetime with me what an asshole right they'd be like well what time did you want to facetime well 2 a.m on a tuesday and they'd be like you don't think that's a ridiculous time when did you ask her to do this 15 minutes before they'd be like no you're the more you talk it out the more you like present this in a court of law you go oh they would be shot down in two seconds so that might be a good exercise to like you know do a face time on your time don't do it because someone wants to hey i'm sleeping let's do it wednesday at three i love that okay this

one could have been written by me in 2007 um but it wasn't i just want to make that very clear I'm here with my uterus. Back when I had a uterus and I was making bad decisions. Dating advice needed. Okay, so I've been dating this guy. He lives in another state where I often travel for work. First set of dates went great. He set up a third, but I had to fly in a couple days early to make this date work.

We talked in detail, reschedules and plans. Now I'm in the city. The date should be tomorrow, but he says he's sick, possibly COVID, and will let me know in the morning. my gut says he's gonna cancel but i feel so stupid for coming in early and also really bummed i don't know if he's lying or telling the truth but regardless it sucks if he doesn't show tomorrow how do i handle what do i say oh my first thought was if he really wanted to see you he would just not tell you he has covid who tests for covid anymore exactly um i do think it's a new excuse is i mean it's always been an excuse ever since the dawn of covid right right well it used to be

messed up if you didn't test but now i almost think if you're testing you're looking to to get out of something yeah right agreed yeah i'm with you um i so this question is a good one because this is like kind of the reason we do the podcast is like there's going to be one loud friend who screams he's married which right like which is like fine that's an option in a series of options of what's going on in this scenario to me i am a guy who's never been married who has dated people from other states who have flown in and flown out and done this and i'll say it's easy to be a boyfriend for a weekend than it is to be a boyfriend for a week or a month so you have been scheduled in he is a single guy during the week and he knows

when you're coming in and can clear a calendar so when you're dating quote-unquote he's also dating other people he's also living his life as a single person so all of your hangouts are not really real they don't have any like outside interaction he's probably really good about being on his phone because anyone can do that for like two days when they know the person's leaving there's an end date on this relationship so the minute she came in early is the minute she's seeing what it's like to actually be in a relationship with him which is not as you know ready to hang as he was before now does that mean he has a girlfriend or dating other people it could be anywhere in between but i just think she has to realize it's okay to be turned off

I'd say the answer to 99% of dating questions are exchange the word confused for turned off and let that person know. And that is the answer to every question you'll ever have. So, hey, I'm a little turned off that you couldn't even make a plan with me. We've been on four dates and I came in a little early for this hangout. And now I'm a little let down. And then let him talk. um he's gonna give you answers uh that might will be anything from truthful to not truthful but he's either gonna like make you happy or not and now you're in a real relationship now

you're actually dating him so i think and also i think just say that you don't give a fuck about the covid and then see what he says yeah right right i wouldn't care about my wife having covid i'd be like get over here and suck my face it wouldn't matter yeah i just feel like it doesn't don't suck faces jared first of all let's set the precedent wives do not love die love dies that's i forgot the motto of the lady gang podcast true love dies use them for their money bang them for their bank account exactly bang them for the bank um okay well listen i we've really loved this i hope you guys will come back and i want everyone to uh go if you're not already i i think you probably are but if you haven't already go subscribe or

follow now is the new term the u-up podcast um you can follow the uh the instagram account it's u.up.podcast jared's on tour all summer long you can visit his ig and go into his like little linky thing and then all the dates are there you're really you're really hitting those cities fried um and you can also check out these towns jared also has a fabulous netflix special 37 and single which is so huge very very difficult in the entertainment world to get in your own netflix special so i'm very very happy for you um and um this was amazing and we will see you next tuesday wow that was terrible that was our best thank you so much for listening the lady gang is produced by steve delameter stacy para

jared monaco and social support from amy ryerson it really means the world to us when you show up in our community outside the podcast so sign up for our secret facebook group just search the lady gang under groups follow us on instagram and tiktok at the lady gang and the most important thing you can do is share this episode with a friend we would love that so much thanks for listening We'll be right back.