LadyGang - Just Us Quickie: Letters From Our Moms

Episode Date: May 8, 2025

In this special Mother’s Day episode of Ladygang, things get emotional as Becca surprises Keltie and Jac with heartfelt letters from their moms. Instead of reading their own, they decide to have their letters read to them. Becca starts by reading Keltie’s, setting off the tears and laughter. Then Jac reads one written to Becca—one she hadn’t seen before—and we learn a sweet surprise: at just four years old, Becca decided to change her own name. Finally, Becca closes things out by reading Jac’s beautiful letter, bringing it all full circle. It’s a fabulous intimate episode that perfectly captures the heart and humor of the Ladygang.We have deals for YOU!!Good Wipes: Get your first pack of Good Wipes FOR FREE! Buy any package, text your receipt, and get reimbursed! More info at GoodWipes.com/ladygangLadyGang is sponsored by BetterHelp! Visit BetterHelp.com/ladygang for 10% off your first month!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

It's time for a quickie podcast one presents the lady gang, the Hollywood girl posse with lady gang quickie. Here's Kelty Knight, Becca Tobin and Jack Vanek. Let's make this quick. Hello, hello, hello. Welcome to the lady gang Mother's Day quickie. I'm surprising these ladies right now. Oh, Kelty's face. She does not like surprises. No, I love it. okay so it's in honor of mother's day yes kelty we are shifting some episodes around this will be airing thursday before mother's day okay um oh this is mother's day is coming up on sunday okay and i reached out to each of your mothers and had them write a letter to each of you no yep that i will be reading and um i haven't even read my own from my own mom because i wanted

but I knew it wouldn't be fair if I had already read mine and then you guys, you know, hadn't read yours yet. Yeah. Would you like to read yours aloud from your mother or would you like me to read the letter from your mother to you? Whatever you think. Do you want me to read it to you? Sure.

I'm so scared. Why are you scared? It's very sweet. I know. Emotions. Emotions are scary. um I think I will have mine read yeah go ahead you read them okay from Sheila okay to my dearest Kelty I always knew that I was going to be your mama because I didn't have a mom or a sister I

trusted from the beginning that God would send me a precious daughter and precious is exactly what you have been you have brought so much joy into my life you have filled my heart with pride in a million different ways your laughter has been the sound that raised my spirits each and every time I heard it. Your zaniness and silliness has brought constant sunshine into my world. Your kindness, like waiting to walk to school every day, all through elementary with a boy who had polio and was slower, like getting a letter at the end of grade 12 from a young man who said your kindness to him throughout high school made all the difference. It brought me to tears to realize very early that my daughter was going to make a big difference to people, to the world,

just by being herself. That authenticity, that realness. Oh God, I can't even look at you. that authenticity that realness has always been something i love so much about you hun and makes me prouder than any of your many many wonderful accomplishments remember how we laughed at you winning the best dressed in high school when we knew you bought everything from thrift shops i loved how you could carry off anything yeah and be successful at it because you were the embodiment of truth i have learned so much from just watching you live your life my darling healthy. And my heart has been filled with joy when you succeeded and heartbreak when you did not. But always, always with love and admiration for the fearless way you've taken on the world

on your own by your own rules. I have watched you fight for your dreams and goals with strength and tenacity. I have watched you face personal disappointments with grace and humility and have been in complete awe of the way you own your own shit. you have the fierceness of a lion and your loyalty and love to our family have saved me helped me supported me in ways you will never know it has been the biggest honor of my life to be your mama i love you to the moon and back always mom oh i'm not emotionally stable enough for this. I know. I'm so sorry. Oh my God. We're so raw. I'm so raw. It's actually so crazy that you did this because I, um, this is so stupid. Hi mom. I know you're listening. I told you not

to listen to the podcast. Please don't listen. Anyway. Um, I actually, uh, I'm going to talk about it soon, but I have been having a little of a rough go here. And my mom just had cataract surgery and her both of her eyes and they do one one week and then they do one the next week in case they like make you blind or whatever. And I literally was like, so mom, like, when are you coming? And I like do it under the vise of like, I have shelves we need to clean. But like, I'm literally like, I need my mom. And she's like, I need I have to wait and get my glasses. And anyway so that was very nourishing for me to hear her letter because you know I left home when I was 18 and um I did not have a big relationship with my family in my 20s I was in New York and

I was so ready to prove myself that I didn't need help that I just like it was so bad there I was making such poor decisions that like I couldn't even call them first of all we didn't have cell phones the way we do now that's how old I am but I couldn't even call my parents to be like, they'd be like, How are you? I'd be like, Well, I've been drunk for three days, and I have no money. So I live in a loft bed. And I'm sleeping with terrible guys that treat me like garbage. And I eat baguettes, because it's all I can afford. Like, how was I going to report back, you know, and my big girl moves to the city. And so I just like didn't report back. And one of the great joys of my 30s and 40s is how close I've become with my family. Really, honestly inspired

by y'all. Like I, I watch you be best friends with your moms, Jack, May and Jack. Like I just really wanted that. And, um, I've had a new closest with my mom since she come, even since last year when she helped me with my hysterectomy, um, just going through that. And there was like a psychological portion of like not having kids and the finality of that. And I didn't think I'd feel that way in the way she held me in that. And anyway, she's very beautiful, but it's so crazy because I just sent her Mother's Day gift and I got her this book that I found at Marshall's and it's like a picture book.

It's big. It's like a scrapbook and you fill it out. It's like a baby book, but for your mom. Cute. It's lost in the mail. I don't think it's going to ever make it to Canada. I sent it three weeks ago and I sent it to my brother's house

and he's like, their box didn't come. But it's like, you fill out something and then like my mom's favorite color and blah, blah. So I filled it all out and then I sent it to her to like her to fill out her part. and we're going to send it back to and forth to each other. Anyway, I wasn't emotionally ready for that, but God, moms, moms are such a blessing. And, um, that was very nourishing. And I think that my mom's delusion, um, like she's super smart. Like she's a master's degree. She's super

smart. She should have known, like she would know that I was stupid. Do you know what I mean? Like she, she's a smart enough woman to look at me and be like, this bitch is crazy, but she never made me feel crazy. She never was like, you literally think you're Giselle. Like you are walking into these rooms. Like you are the piece still a resistance and girl, you are like a nerd from Canada, but she never like, I didn't know I was ugly or had bad teeth or was we like, I didn't know I was weird in high school. Like I didn't know any of that until I got older and was able to look back at it. And I was like looking at pictures and I'm like, my mom really made me feel like i was the best and prettiest always that's such a good sign of her parenting though like

that delusion of it yes i mean that's the world is gonna tell you enough that you're terrible the number one thing that you get from like bad parenting is just that shitty shitty i'm the ugliest person in the world like i should not have moved to new york city to become a dancer like the fact that i did that like someone's like yes you're in the back row of all the jazz groups and can barely do a center split. You should absolutely, like the delusion of it all was so crazy. Okay, Jack, you go.

Yeah, but like also it's a real testament when we have, you know, people in our lives who don't think that, it's women, a lot of women. You're the exception, Kelty. So much, like I'm not ready to go after that dream because I don't feel like I'm the best at it or I've had enough experience or whatever. You're an example of just the tenacity.

Like your mom said in the letter, tenacity is so much a part of it like obviously you're also a beautiful woman so that helps um and but it's i don't know it's cool it's like you're an example to a lot of people if you drink your own kool-aid enough and you believe in yourself enough and you work your ass off like you can do it that's like 99 of the the mix so true okay um okay i maybe i'll have one of you read my mom's i haven't read it i have to yeah jack has to read it okay um i'm sure sheila was an overachiever and wrote like the most okay jack okay my dearest becca another mother's day is almost here which brings the opportunity to reflect on so many joyful memories

of being your mom you came into the world as rebecca but by the age of four you you stated in no uncertain terms that you didn't like your name and wanted to be called becca instead my feelings were hurt at first because much thought and debate had gone into choosing your name before you were born I thought Rebecca was a beautiful name and loved its Hebrew roots and meaning also was the only name on my short list that was acceptable to your granny June in reality Becca suited you better and somehow you knew it at the ripe old age of four throughout your childhood I marveled at your ability to clearly state your opinions express your desires and persist in obtaining your goals whether you were pursuing gymnastics cheerleading or musical

theater you demonstrated so much courage and determination your persistence and courage has followed you through life and has played a large part in you becoming a mother one of the greatest joys of being your mother has been spending time with you and ford i cherish your mother's day and his grandmother happy mother's day all my love mom i love how all that surrounded you being like I am not a Rebecca. It destroyed her. She like it actually, when I had to choose my name for the Actors' Equity Union, it's like your official stage name. I was doing my, like sending in my paperwork or something. And my mom, it was like her last ditch effort. She's like, are you sure? She's like, I think Rebecca Tobin sounds really pretty. And of course I was a big old asshole.

And I was like, shut up. It's it's hideous. So I'm sure karma is coming for me. And, you know, my child will somehow screw up the name that I took so long deciding how to name him. Even though there's no nickname for Ford. Well, Ford is the nickname. So maybe he'll start go by Rutherford, which I love. That would be a crazy, a crazy twist. the lady gang it must be such a trip like to be a mom and watch your kid be a mom yeah we're all just like little girls right we're all just little girls even your mom even our moms no my mom is like 17 inside it's wild like when you actually get to the core i'm like i think our

our skin bodies like just decay and then our little brain is still like i'm just a girl well there's that there's all these like it's so stupid because it's on tiktok but it's like me remembering that my mom is going through life for the first time too and it's just it's so dumb and that's also what i keep noticing i went on a girl's trip with 10 women and i have the youngest kid like amongst us so i was thinking about some of my girlfriends that were there who have like preteen daughters. And I was like, wow, when I was 13 years old, if you would like, let me be a fly on the wall on my mom's girls trips. I didn't think that we would all still be acting like this. Like I thought there was some sophisticated thing going on. It's not

at all. It's like, we're all just little girls like dancing and frolicking. And it's really, it's so trippy. It's really, really trippy. And also like the, the moms that have boys that are preteens, like, I just think about going over to boys' houses and like the boys that I had crushes on and seeing their moms and just really observing the moms. Cause to me, the mom of a boy was such an alien, you know, like, I don't know how, how I can describe it other than that, but they were so different than the girl moms in my life. And so, and then I'm like, I'm going to be that alien to some little girl. Like some little girl is going to have a crush on Ford and come over and play with him in the yard and ride bikes. And I'm going to be that like weird lady,

like a weird old lady. But you're like, but I'm, I'm just a baby too. It's so weird. It's the whole thing is very trippy. Life is so weird. It's so weird. Are you ready for your letter, Jacqueline? Yeah. Okay. Dear Jacqueline, to me, every day is Mother's Day. I feel so grateful and so blessed to have you in my life.

I thank God every day for giving you to me as my child. Little did I know all those years ago that not only would I be giving birth to the baby I always wanted, but also to my very best friend for life. Throughout the years, I have had so much fun watching you grow into every phase of life from a baby to a toddler to a young child to a teenager and finally into an adult. You've always brought me so much joy and happiness. You have always been my creative and smart and loving child, even when you had your bratty or stubborn or sad moments.

I still couldn't have loved you more. In the hardest times or the happiest times, I know I can always count on you to be there for me, and you can count on me to be there for you. We are a family that shows up for each other. Soon, you and Jared will start your own family. You will have your own little girl to love more than anything in the world, and I will get to relive all the joy of watching another little you grow up.

I can't wait until you become that mother and you are able to feel a love so deep and profound it's undefinable. A love where you would truly give up your life for your child. That is the love I have for you. You are the perfect child for me and I am the perfect mother for you. I am so proud to be your mom. I love you forever, mom. Oh, I love my mom so much.

This is so emotional. I'm so sorry, you guys. well lady gang i hope that this inspires you too like wait i need becca i need jack's reaction to her well i'm trying i'm giving her a moment okay i'm buying her some time no i'm okay no it's just like i mean my mom's my best friend in the world i can't imagine like not being with her like all the time like i'm just so happy that i moved down to orange county and i get to see them literally every day um and i just i love them so much and it's like the part when she was just saying that we're just a family that shows up for each other like that's literally the basis um of our of our

family like we just do no matter what it's like a given and it's not work it's not um it's you don't have to like force yourself to do it it's just like what we do so i love her she's best very sweet and i'm not pregnant that's not why she said like i can't wait for a little girl no it's because she has embryos in a freezer and most of them are women and they're all they're all they're all ladies listen if there's one thing i know about jack is she gonna get a baby that she's asking for that's right she will design that child the way she designs a lady gang t-shirt okay she sure will she's gonna make sure she already has it it's what i want bitch yeah she's gonna get what she wants did i also i'm just realizing did i ask your mom to write a letter

after cataract surgery kelty probably but she was like probably so thrilled she had like one eye open yeah maybe your dad helped her no she's fine you can see after i think it's just itchy it's probably it's just so she was texting me well one of her eyes worked that's why they do one at a time yeah just in case just in case something goes terribly wrong i think that like you know i think that moms just want to be involved in what even when they're not they they don't really understand it. Like, I think I've learned that about Chris's mom. Like it's like, they just want to be part of the, part of the mess. Yeah. They just want to be included. They just want to know, you know, what's going on and it's nice. It doesn't always have to be

perfect, you know? And like, it's okay for them to worry about us. It's okay for them to be like, how are you? And for you to be like, I'm a mess. Like it's okay. They can carry that. They're your mom I also think all of our moms did something that's really hard to do but made it seem pretty effortless like I think about the time in our 20s where we really rejected I don't know if you did so much Jack but like I really rejected the help I rejected them being in my life as much like I really did only see them a few times a year I'm gonna do it my way yeah yeah and I pushed her out and I pushed her out and I pushed her out and I only called her when I needed money and shit. So it's like a lot of moms have trouble keeping the disappointment to themselves in those times.

But there was something about our moms all understanding that if they kept it cool, that we'd come back around and there would be nothing that we had to repair. You know, it's like part of being a mom is kind of keeping those things to yourself and like giving grace to this little human who's living here on earth for the first time and this go around and it's like it's a perfect reminder too for me like you said kelty even with like my mother-in-law and my mom it's the same thing it's like they just want to be included and feel included and zach gets frustrated sometimes he's like my mom's upset that i didn't tell her that i was going on a work trip this week he's like i barely tell you and i'm like she just wants to be in the loop you

know she births you she she raised you she like you're her like an extremity and for you to be wandering the globe and not telling her i'm sure it feels really weird um well and it's like if the worst thing in the world is them just wanting to be close to you it's like yeah is that my brother to like just got at me after this um because like as you guys know like when i am in one world i like have a hard time getting out of that world into the other world so when i'm in like good daughter mode or I'm in like family crisis mode it's like all family and nothing else matters and then I get into like oh doing this mode and then whatever and Chris and I have this relationship where like he's in India or he's in Europe and like I don't hear from him for three days because

I'm like don't wake me up I I know you're okay like we're we're just very independent I'm a very independent person and so my brother is like yo text our parents like and I'm like but what like oh I don't I'm doing the same thing every day like what am I texting you hi put my eye cream on and he's like send a picture of the dog send a picture of the tree anything it does not matter he's like just wake up every day and send them a text it doesn't matter what you're doing it doesn't matter why you're doing it just send it and I was like okay okay okay and like I I do do that and it's like sometimes they don't write me back and now I'm mad I'm like y'all did you get my text did you get my picture of the new chair for the yard like what the like no one's responding they're

like oh sorry busy i'm like oh god you're busy i'm like what are you doing it's winter in canada there's literally nothing to do so anyway what a beautiful that is good advice from your brother i am framing mine i love it so much so cute that was really good i really appreciate your mom's doing it i didn't give them much notice at all and sheila expressed she was not thrilled with my timing I bet she did no she said did she mention your spray tan my spray tan no because this is what she like because that's what she mentions to you no she hasn't seen me on tv in a couple years she can't she doesn't know what my spray tan looks like uh oh because she's like when do you need to buy it and then she said oh my gosh cutting it to the end aren't you

sure can hun I was like oh no I disappointed her oh my god wait when did you ask yesterday yesterday oh my god you know what's so funny too is because well if this is airing on thursday we're literally like on a flight to japan right now um with my parents because obviously they're my best friends like my mom said um but my mom's been like getting into watercolor painting she's been taking like painting classes and she told me that she would paint me a painting for our house and yesterday i went over i was like have you painted my painting yet she's like i've been really busy and i'm like you know she probably took her all day to write this thing too that like she couldn't even paint well i think she i think i asked them like kind of towards the end

of the day yesterday so really really didn't give them enough time i gave them like 12 hours notice oh shit wow and you know she had to write like a full book she's like my darling day one day one you were born okay this is amazing yeah all right well happy mother's day to all the mothers to people with mother figures to people who are godmothers or who are mother figures or stepmoms or grandmas or whatever it is, just, you know, people who nurture and care for other people. It's our day to day. And I love you guys and tell your people, you love them, write them a letter. It goes a long way. You don't even have to buy a present, save some money, write a beautiful letter. And happy mother's day, Becca. Yeah. Happy mother's day to you.

Thanks. Thank you. You're really doing a good job. I didn't I were not going to this stupid buffet I won so every Mother's Day since Ford was born and you know what this is let me just inspire some women out there for some reason um this is not a groundbreaking thought however I realized that since Ford was born we've gone to a buffet at the golf club every mother's day. And I decided this year that I don't want to have to dress my kid up. I don't want to dress myself up and I don't want to force him to sit at a table and I don't want to eat crappy buffet food. So we're going to a pool and Zach's going to take on his dad duty and be in the water the whole time with the kids. And then me and the other moms are going

to sit on lounge chairs and drink cocktails and pretend that we're on vacation yes perfect mother's day so you're still with your kid and your kid's having a great time because as a mom you love seeing your kid have a great time but you're not responsible for that great time so the dad's dad job is to get in the water and play with the kid so let that inspire you ladies say no to buffets no buffets i can't believe they still exist after covid that's so crazy wild Well, it's Texas. We weren't here for a long time. We were here for a good time.

Lady Gang is executive produced by Jessica Crandall. Social support from Kali Correra. Editing from Jared Monaco. Producing from Steve Delameter. And iconic hosting, creating, and being the gang gang of all gangs by Becca Tobin, Jack Vanek, and Kelty Knight. Kelty Knight support by Derek Haley. Hey, Ontario.

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