LadyGang - Justin Willman

Episode Date: December 18, 2018

Magician extraordinaire and host of Netflix's "Magic For Humans" appears in the LadyGang studio to talk about how an injury got him into the art of magic, as well as how he met his wife in the craft and what it took to get his own show! Check out new episodes of LadyGang's TV show on E! every Sunday at 10:30 ET/PT on E! Follow the podcast on Instagram @theladygang and you can email Jac, Becca and Keltie at Hello [e-mail]! And check out the show page @ladygangtv! And thank you to today's sponsors:  Amazon = Go to amazon.com/shop/ladygang to find their favorite products while keeping the podcast FREE!  LadyBox = Check out the latest LadyBox before they're all gone at www.theladygang.com/ladybox  Fossil SmartWatches = The Fossil Q Gen 4 HR smartwatch starts at $255 at Fossil.com/ladygang Hunt A Killer = Jump on the case and get 10% off your first month's box when you go to HuntAKiller.com/ladygang MedMen = Visit MedMen today and mention the LadyGang for $10 off your order (limit 1 per customer; must be 21+; keep out of reach of children) Robin Hood = Get FREE stock like Apple, Ford, or Sprint to help build your portfolio when you sign up at LadyGang.RobinHood.com ThirdLove = Get 15% off your first purchase at ThirdLove.com/ladygang See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey guys, it's your Lady Gang, Jack Vanek, Kelty Knight, and Becca Tobin. Thank you so much for subscribing on iTunes, and thanks for supporting the great sponsors who make it possible for us to have this much fun with you every single week for free. Well, what is this? Welcome to the Lady Gang. That's amazing. Say that again. The Lady Gang. Things are about to change around here.

Each week we catch up with Hollywood's hottest girl posse, Kelty Knight, Becca Tobin, and Jack Vanek. Hello, hello, hello, and welcome to The Lady Gang. I am Becca Tobin here with Keltie Knight and Jack Bannock. I'm so excited. Are you so, so stoked? How did... We can't talk about it now. Why?

Well, I was just going to ask you, our guest today, like, you were DMing, but he's married? No, no, no, we weren't DMing. I was DMing him for a business thing. Oh, because you wanted him to be in Magic? No. For our TV show. Oh. So you're just a fan of him, and then you went after him.

to try to get him on the show there was scheduling conflicts so i had to go in and be the go-between oh you were the go-between okay anyway sorry oh my god trying to get her in trouble too i'm not trying to get you in trouble i was just confused she's like business with his penis oh my god no i was just a super fan of him and i wanted to get him on our tv show and we were connected okay well it's a surprise who it is i think they knew when they clicked on this episode yeah name on the thing it's true but anyways best tv show i've seen in a long time it's good cool all right back to us now it's time for good week yes it is bad week oh no okay i'm starting okay go i couldn't decide if this was a good week or a bad week

sorry kelty because okay so i'm gonna let you guys decide okay it's like a choose your own adventure choose your own adventure okay okay so i was i was with a friend and he uh does hair he's a hairstylist he used to work at this very fancy establishment in los angeles where a lot of rich people stay like hotel and below it they have this salon that was his like whatever home base there this was a couple years ago and he had this beautiful russian girl come in every single day for two straight weeks to get a fresh blowout every day of her like blonde bob and they started to get friendly because he saw her every day and finally on like day five he's like you know i love seeing you but you can get a blowout and like wait a day or two because it's kind of damaging your

hair and she's like no my boyfriend likes it fresh and he's like oh okay and then that like opened up a discussion about the boyfriend and apparently he's very particular about how she where's her hair has a fresh blowout and he was a better be paying for this oh yeah he's a russian billionaire oh she's his mistress and she flies to wherever he's he flies her to wherever he's going to be in the world when he wants to see her pays for all of her designer handbags purses like shoes is she is done up he said she was like head to toe designer and beautiful and like 20 so they start talking and he like gets into like the details of the arrangement the guy's wife knows about it you know obviously if you marry a billionaire you're like fine do whatever you

want to do i'm just gonna be here spending your money so she said that she was required to have sex with him obviously and then my friend asked like was there any specific like kinks or like whatever what have you she said yes there's one thing that i have to always do i have to get into an ice bath a freezing cold ice bath lower my body temperature as low as i can get and then get on the bed and act dead so he could she's like he has necrophilia yeah why would that be a good week because the story is great this is definitely a bad week that is terrifying and he might kill somebody no he just is having intercourse with real dead people i'm sure but could you imagine if you met the man of your dreams i'm not saying he's the man of anybody's dreams but

what would you do if you met this guy and he was perfect like oh my god but she's a mistress so he's obviously not perfect no but i'm saying not this guy but like in life because people have these weird kinks that come out later like a friend of mine married a guy and she didn't know until like two years down the road that he could only have sex if they role played how did she not know that because it was like you know in the beginning you kind of have sex under any circumstance you know what i mean but then eventually you need to like whatever that was a sidebar but like what would you do if he wanted to have sex with you and you pretend to be dead that is and so you're just not moving you're just she just doesn't move with her perfect hair she just lays there that is

honestly very disturbing it's really disturbing but the juiciest story i've heard in such a lot like you know he like sees he probably like goes on the dark web and looks up like black dahlia pictures and shit on the dark web i am not sure i don't know he's probably talking about the dark web but like what do you just put in darkweb.com like how do you even no one try this at home no don't you need like a separate thing to like plug your computer into dark web magic okay no i mean but he's also a billionaire so he probably literally the means to like find a dead body oh my god oh my god i don't want to know that's terrifying okay that's all i have for you this week because it was good enough for both

thank you me you might have just gotten her murdered no this was years ago and so i think she's safe now i mean i'm sure she's i hope she's she could have died in that bed ice bath if you i know temperature that hypothermia listen if jack wanted that i'd be like i need a doctor on premise so that they can make sure that i don't actually die on the premises you burn a lot of calories that way though yeah but who has time for that i mean i don't i'm looking trying to look for a silver lining in this story she said she would meditate she would have to get into a meditative state to like be in the bathtub and be yeah she needs to like escape her body i don't we all sometimes yeah that's terrifying okay i don't know i'm this i'm putting it in

good week because i don't have another good week so i don't know if mine's a good week or bad week but after great start here good week listen i crushed okay you did crush thank you uh i was on the killed it you did i was on the plane recently and i was in uh ilc and when you're in ilc you can like kind of see what the person in front of you is doing also in an ilc snoopaloo and in front of me to the left there is about there is like a 70-ish year old lady and she did you just fart no i thought you did with my hand with the sound like a really believable fart no i i just booped and i'm just sitting here okay anyways this lady was like 70 and she had a kindle she was old so obviously her text was very big oh yeah and i started like looking at what she

was reading and she was reading 50 shades of gray yeah and she was literally so into it she was like licking her lips she was moving around she was like like adjusting herself and it was i mean i don't know if it's a good week or bad week is it good because it's like you're in touch with your sexual side at 70 like good for you or am i now disturbed but not as disturbed as i was hearing that story that i just heard so well what's the other option questionable story no that's just we're doing questionable week it's our new thing you're just doing one there's no bad week oh no i have it was good and bad yeah i'm gonna leave it at that no yeah i had one but i don't do it no i love doing this to her no that's it it's a new thing now you have to do a questionable week

too no i don't have a question we've already planned mine what is it well we'll change the story right now i can't improv improv improv i can't you're on a boat okay yes and so first of all my good yes and then i ate a banana do you want a piece yes and and i will take my apple too I don't know. Okay. All right. So my good week. I heard a saying that I love.

I can't wait. Talk faster or use less words. Yeah. It's like when people come in and they're just blabbing away. Blabby, blabby, blab, blab, blab town. Taking a, buying a property in blab town so I can make a blab plot. No blab house. Blab, blab, blab.

I love a lot of words. scream at them and say talk faster or use less words i love your your screamy like mantras now they're amazing you're so yourself did you see the kathy griffin tweet yeah she showed it to us i did i think i screenshotted it because it's my new favorite thing in the world some they invited her to come on some talk show or like i forget the like spider web right no it was um it was uh um tony tony lauren no it was tony lauren yes you're right oh tommy lauren whatever her name is wait let me read it can i please read it yeah it's so good you guys are my bad week and then we'll go back to it okay okay my bad week i'm staying in a fancy fancy fancy hotel fancy like

the fanciest fancy hotel you could be in and i'm like i just check in and i'm like oh my god this hotel is so nice i lay on the bed and i'm like oh my god i'm checking it out and i'm like oh this so good is this a good week this is a bad week okay i go back i look around i'm like this is so beautiful talk faster or use less come on see it works i go to bathroom i come back i lay on the bed again i'm like wow this is really nice i turn my head to the left where the bedside table is and there's all of a sudden one painted fingernail a full one a full like somebody popped off an acrylic popped off an acrylic honey and it's just sitting there but here's what the weird thing and it has to do with this magical episode i swear to god it was not there when i

first checked in oh girl like checked in i looked around i was like this is nice and then i went to the bathroom and when i came back out you're being haunted is when the fingernail arrived fingernail fingernail the fingernail i had a fingernail in my hair once at a hotel that was one of your bad weeks like five years ago when we started this podcast can i tell you one more thing yeah here's the really weird part that i do think it was haunted it was my color tiramisu for two for real it was like almost it matched your nails yeah that's insane ew and i was like is this mine and then i was like i have all my nails anyway bad week okay are you ready i'm ready okay kathy griffin responds because she got asked to do

tommy larron's show an interview dear tommy larron you and your network told me my career was over and that i was irrelevant now you want to interview me not only do i not want to waste my time with you i'm too busy selling out shows on my u.s tour go yourself kathy griffin i cannot wait to use that as a sign off i love go for yourself as a sign we need like another something that that can be our sign off for it like another not another episode honestly an episode of lady gang we need to say yourself it's so good so good it's so good anyway i mean okay okay we come what's coming up we don't want him to go for himself no we love him that's so it's a weird thing to say okay we'll be back okay the holidays are here and once again med men is hooking us up so they're celebrating the

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there and you find something you like go to the register at checkout and tell them you are a lady gang listener and you're going to get ten dollars off your purchase so go up there say i'm a lady gang listener ten dollars off your purchase keep out of reach of children for use only by adults 21 years of age or older go there tell them you listed lady gang 10 bucks off of your order be the holiday hero now back to the lady gang warning this is the greatest introduction i've ever written in my life oh god oh god after breaking both of his arms at the age of 12 our guest much like me was forced to do the terribly boring physical therapy and instead started to learn card tricks.

After that, he fell into a pot of gold and a magical unicorn gave him a candy sucker where he ate it and then he woke up with stardust in his veins and glitter in his eyes and he was reborn as a magician. He's a magic man. He's now the executive producer

and host of the Netflix series Magic for Humans, which we all found out about because Jack Vanek literally searches the internet for the weirdest shit ever and then tells us about it. Even though dating a magician Is in my top five people You should never date

We decided to have a date With Justin today Please welcome to the lady gang Justin Williams All right Wellman Wellman Sorry

The intro was going so well Shit And then you f***ed it up I'm sorry It's those lollipops Of glitter and stardust I know But I didn't know

What to really just say Because your story Is like incredible But then I wanted to be magical You made it better You made it better You did I didn't want it to be like

Then he worked really hard At learning magic I wanted the magic To just be on you Like you were just A magical person An origin story The magic happened to you.

Yes. You were in... The breaking the arms was just how I met the wizard. Right, exactly. It was like Harry Potter. You're living under the stairs, and then you, like, find Voldemort, and you're like, magic. It's not like Harry Potter. Okay, so first of all, magic for humans is a smash.

It is. Thank you. It is. It's so good. I've told all of my friends about it. I'm obsessed with you. You're so funny, and it was so well done. Thanks, guys.

Did you know when you were shooting it that people would love it as much as they do? I Right when we first Like the first couple Shoot days Because I think We had set out To make a show

That was like A little edgier Like just a little More You know For grown ups Yeah And then after

The first couple days I was like Man Like it just Like people's reactions Were feeling Kind of having Like a wholesomeness to it

And that And people really You know Freaking out I was like Man we really Should maybe skew this So that people can

Watch it with their kids For the most part Yeah Not that it's a kids show But I felt like The invisible man day when we made that dude I believe he was invisible

I've never in my life laughed that hard I was there were tears streaming out of my eyes I was laughing so hard it was the funniest thing

I've ever seen in my entire life and then did you see for those of you who don't know what we're talking about Justin has a show on Netflix

called Magic for Humans episode 4 will you synopsis please okay so there is this segment where don't spoil anything no don't tell us

this segment tell us the whole show oh so if people haven't seen it they know what we're talking about imagine you're pitching the show to us we'll see if we want to buy it

Oh my god, I'm not good at this. I can't wait. I actually really can't wait. I'm getting nervous. I don't know how to pitch a show. Just tell us what it is. It's like a combination of magic and comedy. Done. I'll buy it. Very expensive. I like it. But I like your humor.

Well, see, I like the adult humor in it. I do too. Because like, and you're very there's a lot of underhanded comments and you're very smart and it's very witty. It's like Disney. You know how they have all the dirty things happening? Yes, the hilarious sex in the smoke right in the dust. the boner on the priest oh yeah so good wiggling around like all over the place what you guys are

doing yeah so you need to keep that in because i think that's that's what makes it different yeah yes yes but it should be like maybe like more more underhanded so like kids it'll go over their heads right yeah well the thing was like the show kind of became so like a disney movie where parents were comfortable until episode six sneaks along and there's men there's men and you know the dog leather dog suits yeah it's like whoa i was looking at a comment on or your post on instagram from that and it was a it was from that shoot and all the comments were like i thought this was a family show until now and like everybody was getting pissed but i i love it sorry to interrupt becca can i give orly a treat yes you can orly orly one of those make orly magic with

a glitter lollipop yeah i wish she could do something to make this family some money i know Come on, Kelsey. Sorry. But, okay, the show is amazing. And, like, you do, you laugh a lot. Because I think I was hesitant because I'm not, like, a magic person. I am. I've been to the Magic Castle.

I was blacked out. I puked in the bathroom. Like, I was more excited about the booze than the magic. Magic's intense, yeah. It's intense. But, like, you don't have to be a magic person to really, really enjoy the show. My favorite comment is when people say, like, I normally hate magic. I was never watching a magic show.

And it's so enjoyable. It's a magic show for people who hate magic. Or who love it. That's a good pitch. I like it. But also, yeah, but also if you love it, you'll like it. If you don't like magic or comedy, then you need professional help. Yeah.

Now, I know that you fell into a pot of gold to get your magical skills, but what was it like to learn, you know, hone your tricks? Over the many years? Over your many years of instantly becoming a magician with magic. I know. Over the 20 years of instantaneous. It's kind of ugly. It's awkward and ugly for a long time.

Like I was like 14, 15 years old. I was doing kids' birthday parties in St. Louis. My stage name was Just Incredible. Oh! And my parents would show for me around and wear a tuxedo with a red bow tie and have a briefcase. Oh, my God. What did your parents think of you doing magic? Well, they loved it because this doctor originally told them like, hey, if you learn card tricks, I think you'll get your dexterity back.

So they're supportive. But because there was a utilitarian reason to learn magic, they were extra supportive. So if you didn't hurt yourself, they'd be like, our child is a freak. I mean, they always made sure I went to college and wouldn't let me off the hook of getting a degree and having a real job or a fallback. What did they think when you're like, nope. It's magic. Majoring in magic, mom. I found a college that lets me major in magic.

It's magic castle. Are you part of the magic fraternity that they have? Well, like the magic castle? No. Or like in college, a magic fraternity? No, there's, like, apparently, like, a society. Isn't there a association of American magicians? There are several.

But I, like, I just, you made me think of, like, if there was, like, a cool frat house where it's, like, everyone wears togas but levitates. You are cool. Uh-huh, but not that cool. I don't know that, like, I would say anywhere on the planet is there, like, a sorority of cool guys doing magic. Well, to be honest with you, you are, like, the 1% when it comes to, like, physical appearance. All the other magicians are douchebags.

Except for, well. There's a story here. I can tell. There's a deep story from you about your blanket douchebag label. Well, I'm just saying all the magicians I've ever seen before are weird. I feel like there's a stereotype for magicians that they're weirdos. Criss Angel ruined it for everyone. I loved Criss Angel.

Well, you know, I think that magicians, and there's more male magicians than there are females, and that's a bummer. But that's changing, which is great. But because magicians can get away with like, you know, breaking the ice in a social setting with magic tricks, and it is kind of like a little bit of a superpower, they think that they are, you know, a little more suave and incredible than they, you know, they don't they don't get the social skills or the tact to kind of match the superpower of being a magician. So you kind of get a little sleazy.

It's like when you're really good at karaoke. You know, those people who like. They come out and then it's Celine Dion. Oh, my God. The f***ing woodwork just guns blazing, coming in hot. It's their moment. It's their moment. It's their time.

That's your moment. Yeah. That's their moment. Were you always been, have you always been cute or were you like, did you go through like a chubby phase or like? I didn't, I had a, I had a fro, like a big old mop of curly hair. Like a Justin Timberlake fro? Yeah.

And you had frosted hips ever? I did. No way. Amazing. And this was like Justin Guarini. This was, I'm 38. So this was. Perfect.

I had to live with Timberlake's curly ears and then Guarini. Yeah. And I had blonde hips. I love that Guarini's in there. Guarini's iconic. You're just the third Justin. I was the third Justin. I was like, let's cut off the curls.

And then Timberlake cut off the curls. He copied you. Copied me. So what were you doing before your hit show? I've been touring like all the time since I moved to L.A., which was 17 years ago. Wow. So I used to tour colleges. I used to do like 200 college shows a year.

By yourself? By myself. Just me, my check luggage, setting up in Poughkeepsie one night. and then Billings, Montana the next night. I lost my virginity in Billings. Billings? Billings. You did?

She can't even talk. It was so... It was so dramatic. Oh my God, I instantly forgot. It was after I got blacked out at a Buffalo Wild Wings. Okay, anyway, moving on. Wow. Buffalo Wild Wings and the Magic Castle

both lead to blackouts. Yeah. It was a similar thing. I think there's a theme here. I don't know why ladies like to spend their free time. But I've been trying to kind of figure this show out for a while. I did two pilots for Comedy Central, which both got passed on, and I'm glad they did

in retrospect, but I was really bummed out at the time. Yeah. That must be, like, just... I mean, it's a... What the thing was is that you're trying to, like, match this Comedy Central demographic, which is kind of like bros, you know? And so I was kind of trying to, like, skew to be somebody I'm not. Luckily, Netflix doesn't have, like, a demographic, so it was, like, the perfect place.

Right. But I was just trying to figure it out. I was just doing a lot of shows. Eventually met my wife a couple years ago. We got married. Was she your assistant? She's not they did my wedding. We did magic at her wedding. That was fun. Yeah magic or like marriage She she levitated me in our first dance, so she wasn't my sister and we were equals

That's your smart man before you met your wife, sorry you had more to your story No, I don't. I didn't mean to cut you off. I do that a lot. No, do it. Okay. Okay, so before you met your wife, do girls like magic? I love that.

I think girls love magic. There are like girls out there like cleat chasers. Magic groupies. The equivalent, but for magic. There's magic chasers? Cleat chasers? You know, girls who only date athletes, you call them cleat chasers. I know women or like girls who only date musicians.

Right. Me. Apparently, it's magicians and musicians for Jack Bannock. She usually chooses wrong. So I'm just going to like, ladies, let this be a warning. There is a group of women out there who like it is a major turn on. Well, there's something. I mean, whoever you are, if you're like really good at a thing, you kind of are like, you know, you kind of have super power.

So if someone does get to see you do what you do best, you know, get to see me do magic or, you know, magicians kind of want to be rock stars. so it is very appealing and obviously you kind of so you got the confidence you got the yeah you got the confidence and skills

I think people everyone loves magic but if you if you kind of are only like that you know let me do another trick it kind of wears off

you have to break the ice with magic and then hopefully be a real person hopefully because I one time when I was living in Las Vegas

I said saw David Copperfield out and I was blown away by the fact that he was married to international supermodel Claudia Schiffer

I was like this guy this guy got Claudia Schiffer she likes a magician I know well not anymore they're divorced

but I'm just saying I was like this bro like bro you didn't find him dreaming did you see him perform

no you have to see him in his element it's like musicians they're so weird looking weird and like smelly and skinny

if I saw him at like a Starbucks I'd be like I don't know and then you put a guitar in his hand and suddenly you're like

oh my god when is a river You know what I mean? It's a blushing, rushing, rushing. Okay. Oh, my God. You performed at the White House. Tell me about that.

Mostly not about your show, but about the security and how do you actually get into the White House? Super intense. Is it so intense? It was very intense. So it was for the White House Halloween party. Who was the president? Obama. That's dope.

Nice. We don't do politics on this show. It was dope. That's as far as we'll go? Yeah. It was dope, though. I love that Michelle. Love that Michelle.

Did you meet them? Love that Michelle. I met them. Oh, that's so cool. Did you get a picture with them? I got a picture with them. Did they send it to you in the mail? They sent it to me in the mail.

You've heard how this goes, right? They're like, yeah, no digital copies. And then they say also, if you post this, it's bad. What? You can't post them. Yeah, but it's bad. And then you magically made it disappear when they came after you. Yeah, nothing matters anymore.

Wait, why can't you post it? I don't know. I guess, you know. What do they think? I think if they send it to you, they know you're going to scan it and post it. You've got to picture the president, I guess. Absolutely. They do an extensive background check on you to make sure you're not a crazy person.

Who'd they call? I don't know who they called. They just run you in the database. They need all your thing and they need your passport. They need to know where you've been. Alexis Nexus. Et cetera. All that.

Yeah. AltaVista. Google you. Alexis Nexus, though. That's what the... You can find everything on Alexis Nexus. My friend has an account there. So does mine.

So we find some pretty good things. Oh, I look up every guy I've ever dated. It's exciting. Like, do you have debt? I'm going to see. Fun. Okay. Cool.

So Jack's looking for some dates and we just want to make that out. So if you got any friends, let us know. We're all magicians, though. I love a magician. She loves them. I'm the one who loves magic. Okay. So keep it in mind.

Anyways, continue. We'll see. I wouldn't refer most of them to any of you guys because I like you all. Okay. Do we also have Fig? I came with my own Fig Newtons. Wait. I'm sorry.

Are you kidding me? This is magic? I brought these with me. This is magic. Wait. Okay. For people listening who don't know what's happening. No, you didn't.

Okay. Wait. Yesterday. No. Jack came in today with a salad. She looks at Kelty, because this is Kelty's office, and she goes, I need something sweet. Kelty's like, I literally only have a Fig Newton. Jack brings it in here, and I go, a fucking Fig Newton?

Where did this come from? I haven't seen one in 25 years. I have not laid eyes on a Fig Newton. When you walked in with the package of Fig Newtons, I just assumed Kelty offered you. No. No, he saw that we like Fig Newtons, and he magically brought those out of the pot of gold. That was weird. This is not even magic, but it's so weird.

And I've never even eaten. These were in the cupboard. I guess my wife got them, or her mom, who's helping us move right now, got them. And I grabbed it on the way out. I was like, I'm going to be hungry later. And I saw that, and I was like, oh, did she start eating my Fig Newton? Because it was an open wrapper. Really weird.

It's all meant to be. It's all meant to be. It's kismet. We are exactly what we're supposed to be in the universe. That is so weird. So back to the White House. I got to the gig. It's happening.

You have to get there very early because you go through. it's like TSA times 10 where like literally a deck of cards as opposed to just running it through the machine they take the cards out and they go through each one

and make sure it's like not razor blades hidden and I was the host of Cupcake Wars at the time so I brought a bunch of cupcakes Sprinkles cupcakes and

can't bring food well you can bring the food but the bomb smithing dogs have to literally like slobber all over it I would not eat food that somebody brought into the White House

I don't even bring food people send me yeah well neither did they because they didn't make it past the kid so those just stayed that's a bummer

once you're in it's really small inside they don't have a dressing room so I was in the map room which is very historic you feel like you can't put a drink down and then 30 minutes later I'm doing a show in front of

Barack and Michelle everyone's in costumes by the way everyone's dressed because it's Halloween what were you dressed as? I was dressed as a magician Obama was dressed as the president we didn't dress up? Weird

You can imagine how I'm sure the press would skewer him No matter what he chose He makes fun of astronauts Exactly That's why they closed NASA down And they can't pay you I think they put you up at a hotel

Maybe they cover your flights but they need to break even Because I'm sure you can imagine Obama spending money on magicians Taxpayer dollars But it was so surreal He was really really really sweet and gracious and michelle was amazing and i got the picture were you nervous posted it so nervous but you can imagine like i think your body your body only knows how to get nervous to like a

certain threshold you throw up and poop but i just didn't even know how to get more nervous so i was like relieved that i was just only as nervous as i've ever been yeah you're like should i be more nervous because i'm in front of the president i should be level of nervousness i needed to be which is the most nervous I've ever been. What is your astrological sign? What do you think? I don't know. Based on what you know about me

and my fig newtons and my tic-tacs. Are you a Virgo? That's right. She gets cancer. That's what she said, cancer. You're a cancer? Uh-huh. Okay.

Interesting. Sometimes when people say things that are so, like him being like, I only got as nervous as I could get, to me I would never think that. No. You know what I mean? What do you?

A Capricorn. Okay. In my mind, I go to worst case scenario, like a death. I'm like, I'm going to die. Got it. It's a healthy. What, in January? Early January?

Mid-January. January. 18. Okay. Cool. This is riveting. I'm sorry. We're going to tangents.

Just dreading off the world. We love tangents. Now we have a special surprise for you. Okay. Because Elena has prepared a magic trick for the taping of this podcast. Elena. You get so nervous. This must be how nervous Dion feels when people sing for her.

Okay, she's going to get her supplies. I did not know she had a magic trick. I guess I like to surprise you guys. Oh, my God. But is this, like, when, like, Kobe Bryant goes to, like, basketball camp and he has to watch people, like, shoot a free throw? How dare you? Elena might be great.

We don't know. Is it a car trick? I am nervous. She's a weirdo. I didn't know that she had a fucking weirdo. So I guarantee she's probably magical. I bet she's so good. I bet she's really good.

I bet she's good, too. I'm really nervous. She came back from Japan, and she all of a sudden, like, had all this, like, anyway. She's so weird. Cool. Okay. Are you ready? Oh, is this going to be exciting for the listeners?

No, I'm going to narrate. We already talked a trip. Play-by-play. Okay. Oh, my God. Okay. Hold on. Let's put a mic near you so we can hear you.

This is... Okay. Speak loudly, Elena. I'm shuffling the card. No, you're narrating. I'm narrating. Jack, put your mic by Elena so we can hear her. Okay.

Elena is shuffling the cards. Okay. Which one of you... Actually, I'll let all of you play along. Okay. Oh. Okay, so she's making the clowns into a couple. I'm glad you got a manicure for this card trick.

It looks beautiful. Four piles. She's making it into four piles. Do you know what trick she's going to do? Nope. Focus on Elena. Oh, I forgot one step. Okay.

Oh, my. We're off to a really good start. She's as nervous as she could be. Are you as nervous as you could be? I'm as nervous as I could be. Okay, so she's shuffling the deck. I saw some of the cards. They're all different, so I know the jig is not up on that.

Which one of you wants to do the card? I think Justin should do it. Justin should deck the card, yeah. Elena pointed to everyone but me. Do I get to pick? Or do I have a special role? Okay. So pick the card, Justin.

Will you tell me when you think you know what card trick she's doing? No. Let her do the trick. But put your finger anywhere. Okay. He's sticking it in. Sticking his finger in. Sticking his finger in.

Sticking his finger in. Okay. Showing everyone the card. Okay. Okay. Okay. Don't show Elena. Don't show Elena.

We know the card. Do we want to tell the listeners the card? No. No. Place it in the deck. Okay. Place the card in the deck. Okay.

Elena is so good at this. I won't shuffle the cards. She's shuffling the cards. I feel like I just saw you do something with the card. No, Justin. Stop, stop, stop. Let her live. That's supposed to be your internal monologue.

Let her live. Justin, you can shuffle the cards. Really? Oh. Justin. Don't play along to her game, though. She's not doing anything with the cards. Speaking of, Justin has a card tattooed on his bicep.

I know. It's cute, too. Yeah, it's good. I wish it was a card. He did a double shuffle. Don't you think? Well, Elena and I planned this. Wouldn't it be great if I tattooed the card?

Yeah, it showed up. That would be good. Okay, so now Elena's looking nervous. Elena is doing four piles on the mink pink fluff that's faux. Jack, you pick a deck to get rid of. Get rid of a deck? She got rid of a deck. So there's three left.

I'm getting rid of this. There's three piles. I'm getting rid of this deck. There's two decks remaining. Becca wants to get rid of that deck. there's one deck of cards like one pile of cards and that was a free choice

and your card is the one that's on top you have to smack it yeah she did it good job very nice how'd you do that do you want to rate her

that was a great trick do you know how she did it I have suspicions I do the same thing kind of go with your safety net. That was good. You did great, Elena. Wow, she's so many skills.

A lot of times when people say, I'll show you a card trick. Okay, it involves seven piles of eight and there's just a lot of counting and it takes a long time. That was a nice tight version. No, she did good. I do like the tight version.

I would invite her to let the real magician shuffle a card. Yeah. I did notice that. If that was Penn and Teller Fool Us, that's when they would go, oh, damn, we don't know what's happening. Really?

Yeah, it's good. Hey. Good job. elena's so proud of you when we come back justin is gonna fix your life probably not i'm just gonna say that right now okay ask the lady gang we're back oh my god oh no these are the same questions for the other episode no where's this one okay all right so we have our listeners writing questions and we give them questionable advice i don't know if i trust you okay or you're a magician but maybe give

him some magical advice i like questionable advice you ready oh this one doesn't have a name she's very blind if you can't tell from my thick glasses okay first one is anonymous anonymous says i'm 22 and i just started to work in a new city one of the guys i work with is around my age and is super hot and smart and we have a lot in common when i first started working here he was really nice i thought he might even be interested in me but after that he started acting very weird He avoids eye contact with me, can be kind of awkward, and if I'm with a small group of people, he will always come and join and talk to everyone but me. Why do you think he is acting this way?

He totally likes her. Yeah, that's what I do. Totally. Right? Yeah. And he's just more nervous than she is. Really? He's as nervous as he knows how to be.

She's ultimate Whitehouten's nervousness. Yeah. I think she should take the initiative. So she's never, he doesn't know that she's into her. No, I feel like it was a very, like. But they work together, huh? Yeah. And they're both young.

She's 22. But I feel like it's been a very surface level kind of thing. So you think he likes her? You think she should? I mean, especially at work. Like, when, if you don't like somebody, you would definitely, like, talk to everybody. Yeah, yeah. Messing around in trouble.

The only reason you won't talk to him is unless she like, you know, like murdered a family member of his that left out of the letter, like did something horrible. I think that she's, she's got a, she's got to admire her. Yeah. Ooh. I think she should do that card trick on him or something. Yeah. Do you think that everybody should learn a card trick?

Are card tricks good foreplay? Oh man. Well. Has anyone ever performed magic naked for you? Or have you performed magic? Have you ever done it? I probably have performed a magic trick naked. But the cards are, it's tricky because of paper cuts.

You know, like you want to kind of guard your goods. Guard your goods. There's other less dangerous props that you could use. Handkerchiefs are great. So soft. And they come in handy. Yeah. Some magicians are kinky.

Kinky magic. Okay. He writes you. Just tell him you should get together sometime and let him, but still wait for him to ask you out like a lady. I love that she's anonymous though She didn't give her name Well we get in trouble sometimes But then if they do

Make him quit the job Make him get a new career So should I call this person anonymous Or should I give their name away You should give their name away Okay Jen A Sorry Jen A Jen A

Jen A Not Jen A Jen A Jen A okay so she says i dated my ex for a little bit over a year a little over a year god damn it i broke up with him because he was extremely possessive of me a friend of mine that i've been very close with for 10 years approached me about a year after we broke up and said that she had matched with him on bumble and she was seeking my approval to go on a date with him

jesus christ i gave her my blessing because i truly feel nothing towards him fast forward to a year later and they are in a serious relationship. Last week he messaged me on Instagram and told me that his biggest regret is losing me and literally begged me to let him come over to my apartment. I know she would be so heartbroken if I told her and I don't

want to hurt her feelings but I feel shady for hiding it and it's weighing on my conscience. What should I do? I have a technical question first. Bumble, I don't know how it works because I haven't been on it. Would she have had to swipe on him for them to match? No, they didn't. Who? Her new friend? The friend and the ex-boyfriend.

Yeah. You have to both like each other. So it's kind of bullshit that her friend is liking her ex-boyfriend. Step one. Yeah. And doesn't she have to unbubble the girl has to start the convo? That's what I'm saying. That's fucked up.

So her friend was sketchy to begin with. But she didn't care and then let him date anyways. She was like, I'm cool. Now they're in a serious relationship and he wants the other girl back. Yeah. He's shady. Well, what's great is that she doesn't seem to have any, I mean, she didn't let him come over and profess.

She didn't let him do magic naked. She should tell her friend. you know she should tell the friend yeah but like definitely you have to show her the text or the message because girls are crazy she'll blame you yeah girls are not girls are crazy but like girls can we can talk ourselves into things that are so not real when we're upset well and it's easy to blame the girl when you're mad at your boyfriend and then he'll probably lie and throw her under the bus for sure i never did that she totally made it up it's photoshopped one time i saw um a boss of mine not a current boss but a past boss's um husband well that's a

lie story's crazy a friend of mine a co-worker of mine excuse me no no i said i saw i saw one of my boss's husbands on tinder but i wasn't on tinder it was a co-worker of mine saw your She came to me and was like, oh, my God, our boss's husband is on Tinder. But we didn't tell her. Maybe they were already separated. No, they're still married. Oh, good. That's weird.

Maybe they have an open relationship. They definitely don't. Yikes. That's such a ballsy thing to do, because Tinder is public. Do they think that nobody's seeing this? I love when Jack waves her arms around like a fucking banshee. She's doing magic. She's doing magic!

She's casting a spell. I feel like I'm in Fantasia. okay anyways last question comes so she's telling the guy i think she totally should tell the guy tell the guy or tell the girl tell the girl tell the girl justin says tell the girl tell the girl yeah she's he's got a hit show on netflix listen to his advice don't listen to us we've got a cable show that is not yet a hit fingers crossed fingers crossed for us okay last question comes from katie katie says these are all very girly questions because i wanted to get the guy's perspective. It's not often we have a guy.

Okay. Katie says I've been hooking up with this guy for the past three years while we were in law school. Jesus Orly. Allegedly he had a relationship somewhere between our hookups and it ended badly. We tried going exclusive quote unquote. I need you to start again. Why?

I lost it. You can read it yourself. I'm not. I like to listen to you so that our guest knows what to do. Are you reading along as well? No, I'm not reading along. Okay. We can though. I like to read along. Okay, here we go. We're reading along now okay we're ready how about we all read it together ready three two one i've been three years while we were in law school just the first sentence is probably yeah yeah that's enough and then the question at the end okay allegedly he had a relationship somewhere in between our

hookups and it ended badly we tried going exclusive because he didn't want the relationship title but literally a day later he was flirting with other girls we hoped that things would get easier without the pressure of school after graduation we've hooked up a couple times since graduation but we're still in an awkward place my friends are all are over the back and forth with him but i don't want to give up what should i do okay i don't really understand the question the question is she's been hooking up with this guy and he doesn't want to commit

and put a label on it he doesn't want to commit he's been hooking up with other people her friends are annoyed her friends are annoyed and she's like what do I do

I don't want to give up on him my advice is he's just not that into you he's just not that into you if he's putting his pain in you and then someone else he's not that into you yeah

you have to have the guy liking you more he has to like your honey pot the best Justin I just like listening this is fun but and

yeah She said that he had a relationship midway between their hookups. Does he have to like your honeypot the best? He's got to like your honeypot the best. He's got to want to just claim that honeypot. He's got to stand by you with the ocean. He's got to see by you with the stars. Are you singing all the lyrics?

He's got to truly, madly, deeply you. I was like, is this Savage Garden you're singing? There'll be your wish. There'll be your dreams. There'll be your fantasy. Please shut up. I used to love that singer. When you met your wife, did you stick it in anyone else after?

No. I didn't. because you can't it's like once you found you know you know yeah it's so crazy like like all of us instantly we're like oh he's just not into you yeah it's so crazy when you're that person and i've been that person where you're just so blind to it well dating culture is so weird it's like especially with the apps and stuff like that like everybody is like half in half out to everything for the most part so it's very rare that somebody just wants your honey pot and no one has like a difficult conversation of like you know what i'm actually not they just go

They don't know how to be an adult and just be like, I am not ready or like, I don't know. They just try to like lie to everyone and please everyone, which is like, and pleasing no one. Nobody's trying to please everyone. People, the guys are just douchebags. And he's going to keep coming back and sampling your honey pot. If you keep giving him the sample for free, like, you know, put it away. They went exclusive because he didn't want the title.

If he doesn't want the title, he doesn't want the honey. Wait, so they were exclusive, but they weren't boyfriend and girlfriend. They were exclusive, but they were not boyfriend and girlfriend. That's a red flag, honey. Isn't that the same thing? Yes, it is. No, I don't think so because I think, like, there have been people that I would like to exclusively just have sex with them because it's, like, just feels safer to, like, only be having sex with one person regularly. But I didn't necessarily want that person to be, like, my forever person.

But when you say you're exclusive with somebody, you're kind of leading the person on to think that you're going to want to be with them. Yeah, for sure. It's like you're my exclusive hookup. Yeah, yeah. But being a boyfriend or girlfriend implies that this will lead to maybe then. Yeah, etc. Right. Yeah, they said there should be a title exclusive hookup. Yeah, I like Exclusively hooking up. I love that. I think that's great. No, we're both lawyers. They should drop some paperwork. Yeah, just finish law school Yeah, they're in law school, okay

Okay, so we're so happy you're here, I'm very happy this is the end of the show This is super fun. Wow. We've been recording this whole time? Yeah. I didn't even know we started. Yeah. You're like, this is how messy it is.

Can we talk about just one? Elaine is very casual with the recording. You never even know what's happening. She's ready to cut you off at any moment. Wait, I have a really important question about the show. Let's end with this. With the children and the marshmallows. Okay, we need to talk about the marshmallows.

Are you going to? Don't spoil it for people who haven't seen it. I'm not. I'm not. It's also not spoiling it. It's not like there's a twist at the end. It's so good. It's like that scene is so good

And those kids are so cute Was that the best day ever? That was the best day Because I love doing those segments with kids And I used to do kids birthday parties Tell us what the segment is So I recreated the Stanford marshmallow experiment Which is fascinating

It's like a self control study Where you put a marshmallow in front of a kid And you say you can eat it now Or if you can hold out for 10 minutes And not eat it I'll give you a second marshmallow And they say that how kids behave there as a little litmus test for how successful they'll be forever.

So we added magic into that mix where, you know, the kid's waiting and waiting and waiting. And then, you know, I'd give him a cup to cover it up just in case he doesn't want to be tempted by it. And most of them ended up doing that. And then the marshmallow vanished, and I blamed them for eating it. And one of them cried, which I was like, oh, God, we can't use that. And then later we were editing, and I was like, we must use this.

I was wondering, I was like, either this is the greatest child actor they've ever found Or that kid's really crying Poor thing You just tell the kid after We told That it was a magic trick Yeah I know you didn't eat it

It was a magic trick And then you gave him The second marshmallow Which is actually just his first So he never did get a second That's so fucked up But he'll do great in life Yeah

Actually he got a hard selection And he probably appreciated it About the real world I think so Yeah Yeah even if you follow the rules You're still gonna get screwed Exactly

That's my mantra You eat that marshmallow And then you lie And tell me you didn't Until I give you a second marshmallow Yeah I have one more question about the show. There's this segment where you convince people that they have like a tracking device.

Or was it a tracking device in their arm? Like an NSA chip. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And he brings people into a van. My question is, how the hell did... It's a sketchy van. Yeah. How the hell did anybody agree to go into this van in the first place to think that they're getting this chip taken out of their arm?

So I stopped these people on the street and I pointed out the cameras to them. just so they knew we're doing a documentary about the NSA and what's amazing is that if you have cameras that look like

nice, legit people will kind of trust you they're like oh okay I'm not gonna get murdered hopefully or if I am

it'll be very high quality footage the same way you're taking someone's phone and tying it to balloons and letting it fly away I think they think and that worked against us

because I want someone to freak out like you would and I think they think okay well someone's paying for this phone if it doesn't come back and with the chips I didn't tell them

it was a magic trick and which was what was scary is that they actually fully believe that I'm using a penis pump to extract a microchip

from their arm and they were grateful as opposed to amazed it was insane 2018 in a nutshell oh my god it was crazy are you nervous

for next season when I can top that people know who you are it's like punk to remember they had to like stop using the same actors

because oh my god what if you're out of a job I mean, wouldn't that be a great problem to have, though? Yeah. Yeah. This is great. But, like, I guess—

You're so famous, you can't even do your own show anymore. Well, I think it would be beneficial in some ways in that, you know— People were more game? Maybe more game, or you could maybe get, you know, like, Magic for Susans. I want to get Susan Sarandon for season two. I love Magic for Susans. It's so funny. How did you come up with that?

It was like this—we just thought we should have little interstitial things. Yeah, it's so good. Early in the writer's room, we were like, oh, this show's called Magic for Humans. How about we do Magic for Susans? sounded and we all took it as a joke but it just stuck also people named susan it's such a good like it's always an old lady everyone knows they're all the same you can spot them they're paying with a check at the grocery store holding up the line classic susan classic susan and then the picture that you always stop on for the susans is always like the worst the least flat yeah maybe

the susans will catch on they'll be like nope i'm not gonna let you i'm not gonna make a weird face at all they will they are i love it so much it's random that would be great such a good susan boyle she'd make a good face susan b anthony so on that note seasons of the world and also lady gang listeners where can everyone follow you on insta insta i'm at justin willman w-i-l-l-m not just incredible just incredible i used to be just incredible on twitter and then i changed it to justin willman but there was another justin willman who already had it so Justin underscore will wait can I have can I say something really fast yes I was like 10 I don't know if I've told you guys this I used to think I was

talking to Justin Timberlake on aim his screen him was just in time for the party and it reminded me of just incredible in time for the party oh yeah and he told me like when he was going on he's like I'm gonna be on Good Morning America tomorrow I'll do a sign for you didn't Aaron Carter do the same thing to I thought I was talking to Aaron Carter, Justin Timberlake, and Britney Spears on AIM when I was a kid. We're tapping into some deep shit right now. I believe that you were. I do, too.

I believe that you were. I do, too. Cool. I'm going to have a panic attack if we go over time. So I am so happy you're here. Are you as nervous as you could be? I'm as nervous as I could be that this is not going to work out. Watch Magic for Humans on Netflix.

When does the second season come out? Oh, man. Knock on wood. We'll see. Oh, wait. We haven't technically gotten picked up for another season. Oh, you're getting picked up. Well, they're morons.

I'm feeling good. I'm feeling good about the prospects. I'm feeling good. Yeah, great. Okay. Congratulations. You're very funny. Yes.

And I want to officially revoke what I've said for 20 years, which is you shouldn't date or marry magicians based solely on this day we've spent with you. Amazing. Look what you did. Magicians, you're welcome. Tepidly, magic is okay at this point. Okay. On that note, follow us at The Lady Gang and watch our goddamn TV show on E!

Oh, my God. Soon to be a smash. Soon to be a smash. It's a smash. Ready? See you next Tuesday. See you next Tuesday. See you next Tuesday.

Yay! Woo! Yay! Woo! Join the Lady Gang every Tuesday at iTunes and at podcastone.com. That's podcastone.com. Thanks for listening.