LadyGang - LADY WISDOM

Episode Date: July 2, 2024

On today's episode, the ladies share their hard-earned wisdom, thoughts on being popular, babies, what should be in your photo albums, your higher self, sleeping with as many people as possible, and asking for help. This inspirational episode will make you think and help you live your best lady life.  Check out our amazing sponsors!!! Skims: Shop the SKIMS T-Shirt Shop at Skims.com - After you place your order, select "podcast" in the survey and select LADYGANG from the dropdown menu! KiwiCo: Unlock your kid's brain-building play! Get 20% off your first month with code LADY at kiwico.com/panda  LadyGang is brought to you by BetterHelp! Visit BetterHelp.com/ladygang to get 10% off your first month! Huggies: Get your baby’s butt into Huggies’ best fitting diaper! Huggies Little Movers. We got you, baby. Progressive: Quote your car insurance at Progressive.com to join the over 28 million drivers who trust Progressive!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

well what is this welcome to the lady gang that's amazing say that again the lady gang things are about to change around here each week we catch up with hollywood's hottest girl posse kelty knight becca tobin and jack vanik hello hello hello welcome to lady gang i am becca tobin here with jack vanik and kelty night hello Hello. I have to jump in. Oh, it's good week. Bad week. Okay. All right. It's time for good week. Yes, it is bad week. Oh no. So I was getting ready to come here to do the podcast. You know, as some of you guys know that I come here from Austin usually to do some podcasting every couple of weeks and I cut it pretty close packing wise because I come for 24 hours. So

So there's really, and everything in Kelty's house I can use. We were the same size in most things. So I don't overthink it, you know? Yeah. So this time around, I really cut it close. My Uber was in the driveway and I was still kind of putting things in my suitcase. I was still pulling my suitcase out of my closet. Yeah.

So I'm opening up the closet and this is in Atlanta because I'm currently hanging out with my parents for a couple of weeks in the summer, like the whole family. i go and i open up the suitcase and it had been in like nested the the carry-on was inside the big suitcase right okay so hadn't been an organizational queen would do right so i hadn't opened it since i got there i open it in the closet and the biggest roach you have ever seen no like three are you lying big i i wish i could call my mom right now and explain because she's calling up to me and she says your uber's here the uber's here and i was like mom come here because i'm trying to kill it but what i didn't realize about roaches is that

they actually kind of run toward you no they do so it's like i tried to do it and then it ran toward me like ran over my foot into like a pile of my dirty and they're very difficult to kill yeah so they're crunchy on the outside the bigger they are the harder that shell is but isn't it the big ones they don't come in packs it's like the small ones are the ones you have to worry about Is that true? I think so. But big ones are Lone Rangers. I'm fairly certain that this thing somehow in transportation, whether it was in the plane,

like how, how does a roach get into a suitcase like that? And how long was it in there? And is my suitcase covered in roach poop? No, maybe, maybe actually, he probably got in there. I don't know. Maybe they can get into small spaces. They can definitely get into small spaces. He definitely wasn't in, didn't come from my mom's house.

Are you sure you're in this? Atlanta has so many roaches. It's a brand new house. It is literally spotless. It's on the top floor where there's not a speck of food. This is your suitcase. It's my suitcase that I, but I think it had to have happened during transport. If they don't come on, on the plane, I think it came in the airport.

The, the, the thing that set the conveyor belt. Did you check it? What do you mean? was the bag checked yes the bag was checked that roach is from under the plane a hundred thousand percent like in the baggage area baggage area one thousand percent it climbed in it was on the bottom and then as you opened it it skirted up in the wheelbarrow to the thing it is so if you knew how many roaches are on cruise ships oh i mean they're just all over the place they're everywhere even in nice houses unfortunately you don't really have um roaches in austin i've never seen a roach

I mean, I know they exist, but you didn't have them like coming out of your sink when you lived in New York city. Oh, okay. And I, and my, that was my first, yeah, my first encounter with a roach in a really long time since living in New York. You didn't know what to do anymore. It was absolutely disgusting. Okay.

So my good week is that because of this podcast, I am, my algorithm is filled with Jojo Siwa. Yes. Perfect. And you guys, now she's chugging fireball on stage. you guys I think I sent Jack a video of her and David Dubrovnik what's his last name oh David Dobrik's restaurant near you the pizza he's over there yeah he has a restaurant right pizza and there was a video recently of her performing in the pizza shop oh wow well yeah people just are like they start singing karma and then she starts doing that and I I mean talk about branding though

okay i love it i still love her that's why this is my good week is i have it's the most bizarre thing in my algorithm and every time it pops up i think that it's somebody doing a skit like an snl style thing about her but it's always her yeah well i just heard disney for her birthday getting wasted with tyler cameron getting wasted and then performing yes for people yes it's so amazing she's like bloody mary you know like when you do bloody mary in the mirror and then like she appears god you just have to start seeing karma my favorite thing about jojo sua though is like i don't know not this again not this again i don't know if she's in on the bit or she's in on it like i don't know what it is well she's stunted and in on it yeah like she probably

just gets the attention and she's like i'm just gonna keep going but do you think i think she's less in on it than we are i i think she's yes like she thinks she's taking herself seriously as an artiste i think she's a fun person who enjoys the attention and doesn't take herself too seriously but at the same time i think she believes the people that are egging her on to perform are people that are going to go home and write in their diaries that they can't believe they experienced Jojo Siwa live in the flesh when, when really they're going to go home and write in their diaries that it was the most bizarre encounter of their lives. And it was very, it was very amusing, but it was, you know, she's AJ from Backstreet Boys who we love. Yeah.

But you know, like you watch AJ and you're like, wow, like this, look at this performance. What a professional got all the moves. And then you like hang with AJ and you're like, what's happening? This is wild. Like, it's like such a wild. And you're like, did this really happen? it's the same reason that every single time i'm at a wedding or somewhere social and don't stop believing comes on yeah that i actually hang back you're like even when people are like get it back it's your song like it's it's because i am so in on it that i know that if i were to even lip sync casually people would be like that's strange what if you lip sync casually and then you go the jojo siwa dance i've got to say that would be the best celebrity sighting i could ever see

i actually literally just hurt my neck yeah that hurt my neck she's impressive because she the way she flings her neck around it's crazy and then the other part of the song where she does the full like oh my god i'm like this girl's i mean it's abby abby lee trans the best but she was there was i don't know if it was for gay pride or something but she was chugging fire because she's now chugging alcohol on stage like 21 because she's 21 but she was chugging fireball one day and i was like this is amazing i mean i love fireball she's being authentically her yes she is that's what what i'm very attracted to and now there's sorry i gotta say one more thing about georgia siwa there's a new thing on tiktok where all they're doing like makeovers on

her but they're make unders where they like have her hair like like a soft brown and like a nice eye shadow and like stunning i mean she's so pretty yeah when she was on dance moms she was adorable yeah she's still adorable but she's very you know but they're like if you were looking for the best whatever she said nobody's made a comeback like or she switched it up like this before i'm like that would switch it up if you came back normal yeah it would be weird yeah i think lady gaga did like a stripped down moment didn't she i don't know or was that just in the stars born yeah but like if jojo siwa showed up on the at the met gala okay um okay i'm gonna go next my bad week is also tsa related um as you guys know i'm a big proponent of the packing cube

there's two kinds of people in the world i found that there are packers and then there are packing cube people and if you're like me i have the bagelini packing cubes which also are like a space bag where they zip down and they can really compress your things and i recently had to travel for work and i was you know organized beautiful packing cubes everything and then the keltiness happened where at the end of the thing i was like i can't pack and cube anymore so i just shoved everything in i'm also perfectionist in my packing that i am that person that prides themselves on like how perfect my tsa experience can be like i know no one is judging me i'm judging everyone i know but it's like i will two-handed backpack yeah carry on like but

nobody's gonna think i'm a first-time traveler like i try i travel like i got my to me in my away like jackets sweater off through you guys are no nerds you know what i mean i'm like no metal and they're like they're like put your hands you're like i know oh i always do that i always do that i was like i got this i know how to do this machine you guys are you know that machine yeah yeah like you don't have to tell me i already got it to tell me you like try to beat them to tell me yeah yeah and i put my feet like directly on them like i got it you're like you want your feet on the pad you better watch this mediterranean actually seasoned um travelers you would opt out of that machine why i know because it's bad for you especially with the amount you're

traveling and then like i'm also like extra special nice like when they're like you're all clear i'm like thank you for your service like your service they don't work in the military because they keep the airplane safe oh anyway so you guys it happened what you got your bag i got a bag searched i did too recently me too it was a book apparently a very thick book stacked on top of a kindle can sound the alarm oh well i'm going and then so i walked which i'm so embarrassed first of all and i was like it's a tripod you know i had my tripod you're looking at a tripod and she goes i don't think so she opens it up and she's snaggling through this side left i had all my jewelry in like a pouch and it was the jewelry that stopped it but what

you didn't see what i saw on the left hand side was a sunny side up thong that i had stuck just in that baby pocket for the flattening pocket and it was just living there like it was the last thing i'd taken off last night yeah you know and it was just it was right there and i just thought i'll never live this down i'm so disgusting it was a female no it was a female and she got it but it was just like that is so disgusting i was anyway but now i feel happy that we okay my good week is i have a present for jack oh i'm i'm really nervous about this her love language is gifts yeah oh it's oh i've been staring at that box for this entire time is that what it is is it the box oh my god so jack recently had her one year wedding anniversary and i know

that we never celebrate your birthday on the podcast because it doesn't happen around my birthday so open it up this is okay well i'll describe it it's a little box and well it's a white chest and this is jack and jerry on the little lock it's got a lock there's a key right here i'm gonna open it there's a key it's called petite keep wait this is so cute i know and i'm i'm really excited for you to open it because it's even better on the inside so she's opening it up it has a little gold locket that says jack and jerry and then you open it up and i'm scared hold it for you okay okay i'm opening it up oh my god this is so cute it's a little wedding thing where you keep all your memories from your wedding because jack made so many cool things like

her napkins and her keychains and i know she worked so hard on them and like not everything got seen at the wedding and so i was like well she needs to have a place where you can put the napkins and the papers and all your little like cards and things and you can keep it and just be like little wedding box that is so cute and look isn't that i even picked out the fabric it says monaco monaco i picked out the fabric um because i thought it reminded me of like france that is so cute it's very thoughtful thank you you're very welcome sorry i've never celebrated your birthday on this podcast i don't like celebrating my birthday so this is the perfect gift thank you i'm so excited that's so sweet and that's so pretty it's called petite keep if you need to

give someone a gift and then you can put on the inside anything you want so you could literally put like you bitch or whatever like it doesn't have to be for a wedding and they have like lots of different ones i've never even heard of that before do you want to hear something you have crazy no no um i never actually did anything did anything with my wedding photos i never downloaded them from anything anywhere i actually don't think i have wedding photos anymore unless the link is probably gone the link doesn't work i never downloaded any of them i never ordered a single one and i'm pretty sure that they're gone no forever no well at least on like the brides.com yeah but that was like three out of like 3 000 pictures oh my god it

was only the glee one we weren't even in them i know i know i have to and that was like prime lady games to try to get you gotta get them yeah i'm pretty sure they're gone forever no they have them maybe i don't know it might be like five it might be gone how long oh it's been 10 years oh my god is it 10 years no no seven but still yeah they're gone forever yeah damn well that was gonna be part of my bad week is i did not even think about that it was our one year wedding date well because it's like we had our wedding and then we had like our legal yeah yeah legally got married yes june 23rd and afton had to text our group chat about it and she's like happy one year wedding anniversary and you were like oops we were on a boat with a group of our friends

we're like oh yay but it was the legal like courthouse wedding it was a courthouse wedding but jared and i like we're debating what we want to be our like the wedding it's the wedding yeah yeah yeah but the week that week is special because it was the week that we exchanged numbers like 15 years ago it was the week that we reconnected it was the week that we got legally married like that week is a special week yeah so we're like maybe it's we celebrate something that week because it's like a special energetic week i guess jack you gotta slay your role because listen And once you've been together for a long time, it will be, well, maybe not for you, but it becomes a dreaded thing where you're like, what are we going to do?

How are we going to celebrate? You know, I was talking to Jared that I'm going to make us do the, um, you know, paper. Yeah. I'm like, but you know what? But you've never been anyone. You did it. I think that's cute. Well, Jared's good.

Yeah. We stopped at like two years ago. I feel like that's what's going to happen. But also when you're going to find, you're like, what the fuck is pewter even? Exactly. Is it like, um, lead? I don't know what pewter is. What you're going to find is that as you stay married longer, life gets more expensive,

whether it's houses, kids, whatever you then start just buying things for those things and calling it anniversary presents. Yeah. But I'm different. I will like live for until you feel broke. Yeah. Well, no, but then I'm creative. That's true.

Unless I like lose that, but I think I'll always have it. But now, now Jared has the pressure. Yeah. Which he, his, he hates the gift. Cause he's like, I can never, can you, this is cause this is going to be a lifelong long struggle for him do you want him to feel pressured to give the gift or do you want to is there something that he comes by him naturally that you love yeah i've always told him i'm like write me a letter like i don't need something like extravagant that's sweet i'm like just i

just want something thoughtful and that's it or expensive so it's like either buy me a purse or write me a letter and so it's like if you have no money write me a letter and he's great at writing like he's an amazing writer yeah so i don't i think he puts the pressure on himself because he wants to be as good as i am but like he never it's zach's so much better and more thoughtful than i am and i never tried to keep up it's yeah it's just will destroy worth it destroy your soul um okay so that was part of well that's my bad week my good week is it's been a little bit it's a little delayed but my best friend got married it was so crazy you were like i'm going somewhere and i was like but where are you going well so it was like a quote-unquote surprise wedding

no oh no no that was like felt very shotgunny no she just like she's not like a she doesn't like like the like attention of the whole thing so she's like i'm gonna do a surprise wedding but then she's horrible about keeping surprises so like everybody basically knew except for like yeah literally um but my good week was jared and i like did a joint officiating and it was so cute it was they also walked they didn't she didn't walk down an aisle they both like walked out together which i thought was really sweet and i'm like why are we having fathers walk us down the aisle when we don't want them to like i thought it was like a nice like modern your dad was iconic and he had like a well i wanted my dad too but we haven't seen the footage the 360 cam she always

says we're never gonna see the footage it's somewhere i mean if he's gonna wear that ugly ass thing on your wedding day walking you down the aisle i want to see that first person footage i have to find it maybe i'll find it for our actual anniversary just started listening jack's dad wore like a gopro on his head walking down noah's on his chest yeah it was like hanging on his chest oh my god it was very my dad um but anyways so it was i care so much about like the officiating speech i was so nervous more nervous than anything we've ever done more nervous than lady gang tv like so nervous because i wanted it to be like right and i wanted to be thoughtful And I wanted to like really describe like how I care about her, what their relationship

means to me, whatever. Um, it went great. Like it was amazing. But I do this thing when I'm really nervous. If I'm speaking to an audience, like public speaking, everything like the sound like goes away. Like it goes like mute. And I was like trying to like, I was like saying my jokes and I'm like, nobody's laughing.

And I was like, Oh, this part, this part I think is like, I started crying during like a part of it and i'm like i don't know if this is like getting a reaction and then i watched a video and i'm like i was everybody's cracking up people were crying and cracking up and the same thing happened when jared proposed to me at the show i thought everybody went silent it was just like looking at me it's like a weird psychological your ambient noise goes away silent weird i literally thought it has to be like a stressed response i it has to be because i literally i was like wow those jokes really didn't land and then I watched a video and I'm like everybody's cracking up it was so weird weird I don't know if it's just me somebody else should weigh in on

this not you guys but like if somebody else listening all I hear is laughter well that's what you're like that's like too much laughter and then I think I'm really great and then people are like simmer it down night this describes all of us so well I'm like everybody hates me I'm gonna go like hide in a corner right now yeah and I'm like do you want me to tap dance sounds like you're into this what else do you want me to do okay i can't like i gotta think about it when we do our shows because i'm like does that happen at our shows i don't know but it definitely happens when i feel like the spotlight is on me i feel like everything just like goes silent you're very funny thank you so you have a good like i think that's why we never you she wrote it the jokes

were good i think that's why it's so funny because you're always like i don't like to and you're just like but but you're funny like you're funny and you like to be it's a very weird dichotomy lady gang shows are so loud that it probably doesn't happen that's true right well i don't it's not like i'm doing a monologue no remember when you showed kelty's bachelorette or bachelor video and you and you went through your dms like people are so loudly oh yeah no yeah you're right i actually am really excited i was thinking about this in the shower yesterday which is a weird choice to admit um i'm really excited to meet the men of this lady gang tour i know like you know i was thinking up so we have austin dallas which is texas men which are like it's

very young stone it's very like what are they called the montana boys but like the girls i know a lot of girls come alone and then girls come with girlfriends yeah but girls do bring their boyfriends and i've seen on instagram and husbands and people have been like i'm rallying my guy yeah and it's like i just i think it's a great experience for me i also think we've helped a lot of couples because we've asked people how long they've been dating we'll find out a really long time and then we'll say what's the hold up we'll pressure them into getting if you want us to pressure your significant other your boyfriend or girlfriend into an engagement we are happy to put them on the hot seat and we will pretend you never told us to happy you can dm us and you can

say we're coming to the Dallas show our seats are this area and we will that's a service we could provide a service I love it can provide peer pressure except remember we did it they broke up I think it was in Phoenix yeah I was trying to know what was it he sent me an inappropriate DM yeah right I wonder if they're still together or not I think it was months later yeah and I think he was telling me like it was such a fun show thanks for roasting me didn't work out with sarah or whatever her name is and then like went into oh my god yeah yeah i just am excited to meet the men i have this vision and if you're still listening to lady gang thank you so much at the at one of our shows on the lady secrets tour and it was a girl i think we have a picture of it and

she's with her guy and remember i would like open the book and we would like open your hymnals and you can like read along with us and she's like they were sharing one book and it was like he was so into it are we a pastor and i was like this is incredible like it's just so special so and i do want to let you guys know that i actually have something planned for the tour oh no a special gift to you and the fans that i've already begun preparing oh no so i just wanted a musical number this is going to be the and i'm going to tell people put their phones away because i want every city to experience it for the first time and every week you're gonna get a new surprise oh my god i really it has to be some kind of a performance this is who i'm meant

to be okay when we come back in chicago well she said every time is different you won't know i'm not giving away any secrets when we come back lady wisdom now back to the lady gang okay so welcome to lady wisdom which you should not get from us but it's actually really cool so last month we had a couple episodes with dr sarah and stuff and i think what's cool about lady gang is that we will literally do the most mundane talk about the dumbest shit then we'll age ourselves then we'll be young sconces and then we'll do like a really heartfelt episode that everyone will be like oh my god i really we're dynamic we have dynamic layers layers i'm a blooming onions We're the Nick Jonas of podcasting layers to our love levels, levels is his song levels to your

love. Okay. Anyway. So I thought it would be really interesting to go through. I, I don't know guys. Remember when I turned 40, I wrote this list of like things that I'd learned and mostly I stole them from like inspirational quotes off the internet, but I thought I'd go through a few. And so we just want to like, it's the summer, the year is, you know, half over. We're going to lady wisdom, your life. We're going to give you wisdom based on some of, I'm going to prompt you. And then you guys, I want you to do like an inspirational talk to the girls. So if they're listening, working out in the car, like you just tell them how to live their life. It's lady wisdom. Open up your hymnals. Open up your hymnals. Okay. I will begin with my personal favorite.

You can spend endless amounts of money keeping your face young, but your neck will always tell the truth i made an appointment for a vi peel i don't know if you guys know i peel it's a peel isn't it a v peel v peel but isn't it v i peel it's spelled v i but i always thought you said it's a v peel but i think it's a play on vip right vip all right keep going anyway i made definitely not i made good marketing though i made an appointment for the future because i have some time off work and i was like i want to just like peel my skin off yeah and i have like the face is tight she's right she's done everything right this old lady chest sometimes when i wake up in the morning after i sleep on my side the lines the vertical lines stay all day they never

you know how like when you're young and you get up and all all your lines like dissipate as you do you gua sha i need to gua sha yeah but i want to have the vi pill but then i now i don't have that time off so i can't have it but like i just i can see my mother's chest who spent her whole life in the sun and like i i have the same chest and i know there's nothing i can do you can't boat can you botox a chest no it's your what you're wanting is like more collagen i want or the sun i want sun damage gone it's all i want it all i want a whole new i want a breastplate like the drag queens wear that goes up to my neck and it's just neck and then a breast and then you like maybe a jeweled necklace to cover the line anyway okay well where your sunscreen this okay

anytime this is my lady wisdom for this anytime i like look at my skin and i like see a wrinkle or i see like a sag or whatever i always tell myself aging is a gift and that is like the mantra because the only other option is you're dying and nobody wants that and it's like it's it's beautiful to start seeing those things but obviously we're taught that it's you know you're gonna be less desirable or whatever um and then also to be honest i just like try to look at myself less in the mirror 100 you know yeah because it's like the more it's like you're gonna find something it's like if you're snooping your boyfriend's phone you're gonna find something so it's like oh my god what if you're like every boyfriend if you think they're cheating they

probably are well you didn't say that i think you're aging you probably are if you think you're if you think you're gonna find a fine line it's there so just don't look at the mirror okay yeah i my suggestion is have a kid and you'll care less yeah that's true yeah enjoy your natural hair color while you can oh that's a big one big one you can't yours just looks like highlights no yes well i went had to go so blonde because my hair is so gray because if you look five years ago i had a much darker base color because it was my natural like dark dark blonde yeah mousy brown yeah can't grow out my natural color anymore because it's half white i'm nervous when that comes for me because i don't look good with a platinum up there

well you can do i don't know what the solution is because it's hard when you're like a dirty blonde and you start getting grays you just have to get strategic highlights more strategic highlights i just didn't want to have to keep getting my hair done as often yeah and i probably could have gone darker yeah that were the case but i'm lazy yours looks good here's my question like people are starting to like go and do gray now would you ever rock a gray gray never ever my mom said that after covid she had kind of let hers come in with it and she just was like oh let me see what happens and she said people treated her differently yeah I think that that's a that's a really hard one I think that there are a lot of things that you can like try to accept but that

number one it's such an easy fix to just dye your hair it's not like you're getting plastic surgery like hair dyeing is so easy but like it really changes yeah and if you don't care the way that if you don't care yeah and you're not vain and you don't care if people treat you differently but she was like I can tell a major difference from people the way that people treat me younger people yeah they see like a bigger age gap and then they treat you like an old lady yeah okay well what about you you're going gray i am going gray um you're not really though well i just i plucked out like 12 grays well i'm past plucking i'm just doing my i'm plucking my hairline but if i go it's probably not a good thing to be doing probably

not. But if I go, if I pull it up, it's like all gray in here, but I'm just like, I'm living with it as much as I can now. Cause it's not horrific. I've never looked at you and I would tell you that. No, you neither. Also, I feel like a dick. What I meant about saying have a kid is that you're just too tired and lazy to care. I'm not that like, cause I feel like I was childless shaming you. I did not feel that at all. Okay. No, but if anybody that doesn't, I was thinking about me actually if anybody heard that i just feel bad because if anybody heard that who doesn't want children has it doesn't have children and it sounded like i was like don't be so vain or that you're not so vain after kids no it's that you literally don't have time to be hot anymore right

it wasn't it was not so i wanted to like notice that you're not hot yeah yeah it's yeah you don't you don't look in the mirror not because you just decide not to it's because you just forget you and you don't have time and you're trying to keep a human alive yeah i get it you're just uglier. I get it. Me. Um, I was going to say me and my sad life of just getting up in the morning and being all alone and drinking my coffee. It's a luxurious time looking at myself in the mirror and picking myself apart. It's a luxury of really hating myself. All I do is I spend five hours a day just staring at myself. I have so much time to really hate myself. Okay. Um, lean into your crazier stop worrying about what you're supposed to do party as hard as you can sleep with as many

people as you can live it up don't try to win the race to maturity it's not that fun when you get there see i agree to an extent but i do think the sleeping with everybody i agree with sleep i should have slept with more people oh my god i don't think i could have Friday, number one, Friday, number two, Friday, number three. Um, no, I, but I, you know, I hate that. I'm always like bagging on Gen Z cause I do love Gen Z. I think they're cool. I think they've got things figured out way more than we did, but I will say I have no regrets about hustling as hard as i did in my 20s because i do believe that you either choose to hustle in the beginning of your life or you're forced to hustle in the end yeah and it's you got to choose

one adventure i still mixed in a good amount of partying i have no i really have no regrets with how i did my young years and i worked my ass off that's how i am too and you've energy to party your ass off but then also hustle well yeah that's the time that you have it like when i was going to college. I'm like, how did I go to college every day? And I was being so hung over and blackout drunk every night. It's like, that's the time when you can do it. You're a superhero when you're young. I think you can do both. Like you can work hard and party hard when you can, then one's going to slip off. Hopefully the partying a little bit. I just wish when I lived in New York, I did like a full Carrie Bradshaw. Like I just, I'm, I just thought that I needed to be grown up. And so like,

I wanted to be in like these committed long-term relationships. Like, you know what? Like I should have just been having sex with everyone and I was just being that good girlfriend living in New York but you can't change your desires I know but I wish I could I know but you can't change you know what I mean I also had regrets about spending so much time in relationships in my 20s even though I fit in a lot of other things like in between but like I just wanted to be in those like there was it wasn't everybody does like yeah I wished that I had more but like nobody wanted to stay with me so I was like oh I guess I'm just gonna see a bunch of guys then like I wish I was in a long-term relationship in my 20s yeah it's a hard desire I hated it about myself I really wanted to

be the girl that didn't want that but I just was everybody does it's like really yeah I don't know I think that girls now maybe now is different have a really different like attitude and I think what it what caused that is women in relationships being more open about how it's not a fairy tale yeah right how the reality of it is much harder and way less romantic than anybody ever assumed yeah so especially yeah that's such a i don't think anybody should be in a relationship with their 20s i think we can just like save that for 30 people want to be it's hard i just feel like I spent my entire twenties not ever being where I actually was. So it's like, I lived in New York, but I was always trying to be on tour with whatever guy I was dating. Or then I was doing

peep show in Vegas. And I was like, so sad that I like never really went to the cast things or went to the pool with everyone. Like I was always like in my room blogging by myself, my sad feet. Like I just always took myself out of like where Rockettes I'm like on tour and everyone's like, Oh my God, it's Halloween. We're all going to dress up. And I would be like, I'm just going to be sad in my room alone because I like miss my person so much and I was like oh like I just yeah you know like I only wore a tiny top hat one time well there's a lot of pictures of that time that was a great time maybe twice no I think only one time is a one shoulder you still have it tiny top hat no but we should get one I think you should wear it for tour like my god like I just

Like when I went out, whenever you do whatever you're planning, can you wear a tiny top hat? That's a great idea. Okay. I'll bring a tiny top hat. Um, okay. This is one of my favorite lady wisdoms. Learn to include your opinion in a group by asking your higher self what it wants as if it were another equally valid member and then verbalize it. Wait, what? We did it again. Learn to include your opinion in a group by asking your higher self, what do you want? As if it were another equally valid member and then verbalize it so like if you're in the group like well it's kind of like the concept of like would you talk to your friend that way boom yeah yeah book yeah boom yeah

i love it boom yeah wait did i just make up a new forget about yit or whatever the kids are saying yeah and sigma boom yeah yeah you have to like say of the back of your throat and then you have to like do the hand i'm trying to make it happen try it talk to my no i'm saying like make it happen like sigma's happening no it will happen try it it feels good boom yeah no not not a question it's a statement boom yeah yes boom yeah it's a full sentence you know when they're like it's like, wait, I'm just going to start to be like, how are you feeling today? And I'm just going to go boom. Yeah. And they'll be like, well, that's not, no, you're not using it correctly.

You're already misusing it. No, someone has to say Kelty, your outfit is on fire or no, you're going to someone and you're like that outfit. Boom. Yeah. Well, no, you're literally saying boo. Yeah. Yeah. Like boo. Yeah. Like I just, yeah. Yeah. This podcast is boom. Yeah. no no yeah i mean you're right the tiny top hats are boom yeah yeah boom yeah oh this tankini is really giving me chest chesticles wait i'm laughing because my throat hurts okay it's weird okay the best thing you can do in the middle of we didn't answer that question yeah i did talking yourself the way that yeah like yeah i think that's enough Okay. The best thing you can do in the middle of drama is nothing. Yes. I don't want to bring

up a dark time, but I feel like you're going to, I know I'm going to do a deep dive. Okay. A deep dive. I know how far I've come as a human because I was trying to look up all the girls in the lady game Facebook group that have submitted over the years. And I am the asshole. Like, am I the asshole? And there's tons, but they come like once every few months. So I was like, I was trying to collaborate them all. I was, I wanted to bring it up on the podcast, but instead it just showed me like posts of mine from like 2016. Yeah. Guys, late night meltdowns. Well, the best thing in the middle of drama to do is nothing. Booyah. Boom. Yeah. Boom. Cocka cocka. Yeah. You are the queen of doing it all during the

middle of drama i have never but what's strange is in friend drama you don't do a thing 100 but then in like public meltdowns because i know social media social media someone could literally be like like we you know for instance and i mean this with love we have a brand called signos which is actually a really cool thing where it like tests your blood sugar. And I posted about it and I got a couple messages from lady and girls that were like, you know, I am diabetic and it just sucks to watch someone like count their blood sugar for fun. You know what I mean? And I was like, wait, I never thought of it like that, but like, I kind of get it. Like, but I think it's, you know, everyone's able to do you, you know what I mean? But like instantly I was like,

I need you to respond and make you feel better. But it's like, I literally have a friend that's like, Hey, are you still alive? And like, I won't respond for six months. Like, why do I care so much about what strangers think of me? Like my reputation by strangers. Why do I care so much? But the people near me, I, cause I know they're going to just, I don't know. It's wild, but the tables are turning. I'm just saying I'm a better person now. I know how to do in the middle of drama to do nothing. You haven't gotten a lot better. I'm doing nothing right now. I feel the drama. I'm doing nothing. I just remember like the times where it'd be like, it was always a late night i was always on facebook and sometimes it was alive sometimes it's alive you know

sometimes i don't know i don't know why i do that i really hate that about myself no i understand it is i think it's human nature to want to defend yourself yeah especially especially when your intentions are never to upset anybody sure but the reality of it is is that in most situations like that situation that you dealt with on Facebook, there was nothing you could say that was going to alleviate any of this trigger for this girl. I mean, maybe there's a, I hear you. I understand. But at the end of the day, like usually you just dig yourself deeper into a hole when you try to defend it. So, but I also think that this quote deals with the drama in like your personal life or so in your personal life. No, it's true because I had my best friend,

Katie was here last weekend and we were like visiting and there's just someone who's known you since you're five. Like she could not know me better. And we were having dinner outside and having a bottle of wine. And she looked at me and she goes, you know, I've never thought of you as like a jabby person. You're being really jabby with Chris and you need to check yourself because he's a good guy. And she's like, you're just jabbing him. You're jabbing him the way your mom jabs. Oh, you and jabs your dad. My mom is very passive aggressive, which I, I love Sheila. She's a two on the underground and twos can be passive aggressive where they're like, well, if we had a nicer house, everyone would want to come over. And you're just like, well, yeah. Okay. Like calm

down. But like, then I started thinking about it. She's like, you kind of jab because we went on this hike and it was way too hard of a hike and it was too hot. And I was like, I guess Chris forgot that I had an organ removed a few months ago. Like, because I couldn't do it. Like I, I was like, I just can't believe you weren't thoughtful enough to be like, what do you mean when I want to take your friend for a hike in Malibu? It means we want to walk with a nice coffee, take a picture and walk back down. It doesn't mean I need to go on a six hour adventure anyway, but I just like, anyway, very disconnected, whatever. But she was like, you're getting jabby. And I was like, you're right. And in the middle of drama, like when things are not going

well, instead of like poking the bear, I need to just say nothing and like, and cool down. boom yeah boom yeah okay don't and silence when we come back healthy's gonna be okay you're listening to the lady gang okay spend more time taking photos of the people places and things you love instead of photos of yourself oh that's a good one but like nobody looks at I, I definitely do that. I, I don't have anyone in my life taking photos of myself and unless I set up a tripod and I'm feeling extra energetic, I really don't have, I don't enjoy a photo of myself. So I think this only qual, this is only for a small percentage of people. But do you have,

are you taking photos of other things constantly? My whole phone is things I'm seeing and things I'm around. Really? Yes. I need to be even better at it too, because so my friend Radhika is so persistent about getting group photos with whatever we're doing. Yeah. And you know how I hate a group photo. I hate a group photo. And I'm like, I don't, I don't need this photo. I just don't understand what are we doing with this photo? I, it's so strange to me to stop the moment to set up the photo. And she said to me, I take photos of everything and everyone because I have such a bad memory already. And now when I look through my phone, even if it's a year ago, I'll see a picture of all of us being at dinner. And I won't have remembered. I went to the dinner

if I didn't have the photo of us at the dinner. So we're essentially doing the same thing. It's just that I'm not taking a group photo. I'm taking like a random picture of my kid with a ice cream cone yeah so i remember that time at the pool that he had his first ice cream cones so i just had to reframe in my head and now not get mad at people for taking group photos anymore it's gonna be hard for me but jack what percentage of photos are like you in your own outfits and then groups she's an influencer yeah i know but when when you're saying you hate a picture of yourself i also hate pictures of myself so why do you take so many because it's like what's your job it's yeah i have to but like other if i didn't i always think about social media in this way i'm

like if i didn't have social media as my job i think about it how i think about facebook which is like nothing yeah and so it's like a weird juxtaposition that i have to and i have to care about it but like i look at it and i hate it because i just don't like looking at pictures of myself i was doing i love pictures of like i love a group photo and i love pictures of me and jared like i love that so much i was doing something the other day and i had to get a picture of Chris. I don't remember what it was for. And I realized that I didn't have a picture of us together since we went to Dubai last April. Yeah. Whoa. Like a nice picture of us doing anything. Yeah. I was like, what? But I have so many pictures. I have like 75 pictures every time

I put an eyelash on it. You also, it's also part of your job. It's part of my job. Like it's part my job like so that's not fair yeah but i think that like for girls out there who i don't know does the average girl i don't know we're so in our own bubble that i don't really know the accurate percentage of women i don't feel like any of my friends who aren't in entertainment are taking outfit pictures of themselves and posting them anywhere i don't think they're taking pictures of themselves selfies i saw a whole thing about how like nobody's posting selfies anymore like on instagram when's the last time you saw somebody post a selfie i think i posted one recently you did come on okay tolerance just because some someone

doesn't do something the way you do doesn't mean it's wrong oh nelly mm-hmm it's been a gift a challenge of mine my whole life really i struggle with it too yeah i'm just naturally judgmental yeah naturally judgmental but I think I'm less now than I ever was now I don't I don't yuck people's yums as much as I used to I even was really grossed out with myself and my aversion to Taylor Swift mania because I'm just like why do I care it let everybody have their thing that makes them happy yeah you know I don't it's so stupid for me just because I don't get it doesn't mean it's lame. Yeah. There were things about the mania that really triggered me. It's different when it's getting shoved in your face and you can't not see it. It's different when I think

people become, I just felt there's a line of obsession, you know, and I, and I felt this with even, even being on a show like Glee, I think it triggers you to like triggers because there's a fan base that is so normal and lovely and kind and you see them in the world and they're respectful and they're really just it's so it's a great exchange but then there were there was a small percentage of fans that for whatever reason a certain type of person obsessive person like the people that would stalk people outside of their houses and unfortunately there were so many of those experiences that it put a bad taste in my mouth so whenever i see somebody going with a fandom and going hard for someone hard hard hard hard obsession obsession obsession posting

things that i know are they're exaggerating and it's just to get like a you know and but like people not being able to sleep over things that were happening and going on like i was triggered by it because i felt unsafe being around those types of people yeah and i just felt like these people that i knew in my life i was like are you unhealthy like in this way this feels unhealthy yeah i hope there's a really long-winded way of saying that i'm trying to be less judgmental but i like it you know it's like you do you i don't know what that i feel like i'm coming back into my triggering i wasn't triggered and now i'm triggered by everything i think a lot and i'm like seasons of life i get mad when like people have really good cameras for their podcasts

I'm like, why is their camera so good? Because they spent like thousands of dollars on YouTube. What does their daddy do? Why do they have this like, what does your dad do? Why do you have this house? Like what's daddy do? I was like, what's the daddy do? What's the problem?

Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, yeah. Okay. Okay. I'm going to just end here. Pick the nice guy. What's not in there? Everyone knows this. Okay.

Well, she's being less judgmental. um oh you when you were young you were used to moaning grown when your parents want to listen to the oldies on the radio and eventually everything you love will be an oldie too 1000 this is literally what emo night is oh like it's so funny because there's somebody that was like do you think that this will ever get old like is this just a fate is it literally is it just a phase i'm like no this is our oldies like we're gonna love emo music forever it made me think of something uh at our florida festival can we have an hour of celine dion jamming out because i think there's a i saw something on instagram with a bunch of millennial women

yeah in a day club yes dancing and singing their hearts out to celine and millennials do love celine i think it would be so therapeutic it would almost be a spiritual morning yeah i like that i think it should be like a sing-along and it we should like curate the list yeah where it's like it's the right amount of celine with like whitney like whitney um because i want it all like and it's just like we need a power ballad at the blank page before you picking up the dirty pieces window whatever it is but like but i think it's like a millennial sing-along karaoke i love that like maybe we get brandy cyrus to come and like dj it or something like i just i really want that too and i really wanted

it and i was scared to ask you guys i love it oh my god i'm stoked because i've been thinking about our newest tour like that yeah and i was like the last time we toured we did shania twain as like the sing-along it needs to be celine i was thinking of celine right do you remember i drove all night do i remember to get to you woke you up it was a car commercial Well, that's not the one we're doing. From your sleep to make love to you. You don't remember this? No.

Boom-ca? No. Boom-ya. Boom-ya. Okay, I have to eat sweet green now. Okay, put Celine Dion down. We will see you next Tuesday. Stay together.

Stay together in the work group. One, two, three. See you next Tuesday. Thank you so much for listening. The Lady Gang is produced by Steve Delameter, Stacey Pera, Jared Monaco, and social support from Amy Ryerson. It really means the world to us when you show up in our community outside the podcast. So sign up for our secret Facebook group.

Just search The Lady Gang under groups. Follow us on Instagram and TikTok at The Lady Gang. And the most important thing you can do is share this episode with a friend. We would love that so much. Thanks for listening. Hey, girlies. I'm Cody Rigsby. And I'm Andrew Chappelle.

We're here to announce our brand new podcast, Tactful Pettiness, now on Podcast One. We have a lot of opinions. Flip-flops in New York City? You don't love yourself. If I'm not seated, I'm not tipping. Do I want to see a picture of your baby? No. If I have to scroll more than 10 seconds, he's not cute. Settling gets you an ugly boyfriend.

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