LadyGang - Leiomy Maldonado

Episode Date: June 23, 2020

The Wonder Woman of Vogue Leiomy Maldonado is here! She’s talking about her career in Ballroom and Vogue, how she found her calling, being a choreographer, and bringing you some very matter of fact and important advice. Plus, her new show Legendary on HBO Max!   Thank you to our sponsors! Caldrea – Get free shipping on orders of $50 or more when you shop online at caldera.com.    Feetures – Go to features.com and use cod e LADYGANG for $10 off your first pair.   Ritual – Go to ritual.com/ladygang to get 10% off you r first 3 months.   Stamps.com – Go to stamps.com, click on the microphone at the top of the page, and type in LADYGANG to start your 4 week trial plus free postage and a digital scale.  See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Well, what is this? Welcome to the Lady Gang. That's amazing. Say that again. The Lady Gang. Things are about to change around here. Each week, we catch up with Hollywood's hottest girl posse, Kelty Knight, Becca Tobin, and Jack Vanek.

Hello, hello, hello. Welcome to the Lady Gang. I am Becca Tobin here with Jack Vanek and Kelty Knight. How's it going? Kelty, you look like alfalfa with that little hair spurts on your head. You know what? My hair is like getting so... Come here, Callie. Callie wants to say hi. My hair is getting so luxurious because if there's like one good thing of COVID, it's that I haven't

been having my hair done every day. So it's not breaking off in the usual level that it does. So it's like so full and voluminous. And my top knot is like really quite spectacular. Spectacular. Spectacular. i'm looking so i mean the rest of me is a disaster but my hair my vagina hair is so long and my head on my hair it's good all right okay anyways let's do this it's time for good week yes it is bad week oh no okay i'm starting no because i think ours is the same but okay i don't think so what okay okay go ahead or good week bad weeks are the same i don't know how you could even think that Um, okay. So my bad week is I posted something on Instagram about this woman. It's like, uh,

this woman who went out for the first time in Florida and all of her friends went out and everybody was doing what everybody's doing now and partying and 16 of the friends tested positive for coronavirus after one night out. And my bad week is, well, a surprise guys, it's not over. um but b uh i had like friends from atlanta messaging me being like yeah and you know what they're all gonna be okay and i'm like i want to murder you i'm like oh really they're all gonna be okay like the guy that i know from new york who's been in the icu for almost 80 days who was healthy and like young go yourselves, Atlanta friends. Well, who forgot about the fact that it's not about you getting sick? Like, did we forget? It's like, it's been so long and now

everybody decides they're over it, but everybody like forgot about the reason why we're, we started doing the things that we're doing. I know it's mind blowing. We have like amnesia for coronavirus. It's so annoying. Here's my bad week. I, uh, went out for a run the other day. Wait, wasn't that a bad week? Oh my God. You can't have bad week, bad week.

I'm not emotionally prepared for that. Wait, can I please have a bad week? Because this is a good one. Do it. Bad week. Our first ever in lading in history. Bad week, bad week from Becca. I mean, it's on brand.

Is it a self deprecating bad week? It's kind of a funny, it's kind of a bad week win week. Cause I, I, okay. Okay. So I was running. I'll allow it. I'll allow it. It's a dumpster fire. I don't care at this point. Thank you. Thank you. I was on like day four of my period and it was that freaking dry vagina day. You know what I mean? So I have the tampon in, but I'm running and it's just coming out. You know what I mean? It's just not staying in. So, and I don't want to run in a panty liner. So it's like, I had no choice. I had to put in

a light tampon, but my vagina was not having it. I was really far from home. It was really, really really bothering me and so I ended up removing and discarding oh sick with a blanking or with a short that day I had a short which is also why I had it was very that's also why I needed to discard because if I didn't it's like it could have landed on the ground oh no it was a hot day I just didn't need that in my life so yeah I it's up it's upsetting but there you go that was a win. Okay. Problem solved. Okay. I'm going to go. So for my good week, I got a very interesting DM on Instagram and it says, I just wanted to thank you for all the research that you did on the correlation between drinking out of straws and farts. I literally thought that maybe

not going to work every day was causing some sort of a reaction in my body, which led to so many farts that my family thought I was pigging out all day. I was in the middle of a run when you mentioned in the Lucy Hill podcast that drinking out of a straw was making you fart. I literally cheered while running because I realized that I had been drinking a ton out of a straw. I'm sure you'd rather be thanked for more inspiring things, but now I don't think that there's something wrong with my gut. You're awesome. And I love the lady gang. Thank you, Gabby. Gabby, you're welcome doing God's work here on the podcast. I'm just a gut scientist over here. So that was a very nice message. Okay. So my bad week is I was watching a TV show that I enjoy with Jared the other day,

and we're watching the screen. And then all of a sudden who comes on the TV, but one day stand man himself. No one day stand guy had been a D-list celebrity for a very, very long time. I forgot what his name was for the longest time. And then now in the past, like two months, he's popping up on not one but two of my favorite tv shows and while i'm watching he comes on and jared starts freaking out being like oh my god jack have you seen this actor before like he's so amazing like let's watch some of his stand-up specials no no no no and i don't know if it's this like ginger to ginger thing like he feels this like brotherhood with this guy but it i like just how no well he does now he does now he doesn't listen to this podcast someone's gonna

alert him someone's definitely gonna do some asshole please don't alert jared like jared already has to like sit with the fact that i've made out with so many things the singer of his band i've hooked up with all these guys wait what i didn't know that yeah i made out the singer of his band before like when i first first met him he does know that yes okay good yeah weird and all the other, I mean, he knows so many people I've hooked up with. Like he doesn't need another one of some, like his like other ginger, you know? Yeah. Let the man live. Cause you lived a little too much. I don't regret a thing. No regrets. No regrets. Speaking of no regrets, I will move on to um my it's a good week so um to think about it well yeah because it's about you jack so brian

howie who hosts the great love debate podcast he loves he signed up for our newsletter which y'all can do on our website theladyking.com and he loves to give me feedback on the newsletter like three three to four newsletters like shut up yeah i'll get a reply from brian he's signed up to the newsletter list and he'll like say something about the content of the newsletter. And I think he knows it's going to me. That's why he does it. What kind of feedback? Well, he'll just be like, good one. Or like nice Jeff or like, I love the spice girls too. Like whatever. He'll just write something stupid. So, you know, this, the past couple of weeks, we've been talking in our newsletter a little more about the actions that we're taking to, you know, move the lady gang

forward. And Brian Howey responded and he said, so what you're saying is you're taking jacktion. Oh, Brian. Like an action that Jack takes. A jacktion. Okay. Like a jacktivity, but a jacktion. Like a jacktivity, but like more serious. Like she's taking jacktion. Jack is taking, okay. I like jacktion. Right? That's a good word. It's like, we need to take jacktion. Brian Howey is like my dad just just offering up new words and unsolicited feedback on the reg unsolicited like i mean always and about the newsletter like what a random thing to give feedback about out of all the things that we do the news our newsletter is a hot commodity it is a really good i mean the newsletter is great our opens are amazing and we make it interesting every week and there's

deals in there. I mean, there's about to be giveaways in there. Like shit, that newsletter is better than the podcast at this point. Okay. Was that a good week or a bad week? That was a good week, right? Yeah. Okay. Bad, bad week. Did you think this was going to be our same? This is, this is the bad week that I thought was going to be the same. Okay. So interesting. So we have announced that we, can you stop licking your vagina? I need help. Callie won't stop licking her vagina. Does she have a yeast infection? I'm like, I put castor oil on it. i put cbd on probably why she's licking it no she's supposed to put castor oil on your vagina you're supposed to put it on your eyebrows she's no she's so dry right now she's like very summer

allergies okay okay anyway back to the bad week okay so we have a clothing line coming out for express in july just a few weeks we're so excited and we have gotten together to do this covid version of a photo shoot it was supposed to be this super fancy amazing like in a studio with like 30 people like everyone and we like did it very low-key at Becca's house for our big express campaign which is so exciting so we got like a few of the photos back and just like the photographer was sending us like hey look this turned out great this turned out great and we're like oh my god we look good Becca's like it's so cute and Jack's first comment oh my god on the photos this is the first comment not even wow these turned out greater wow great job was you better tell Claire

to photoshop my mail bed i did not say you better i didn't say it like that it was something can you please i don't talk like you better okay can you please tell claire becca if while i'm telling this story can you look it up on the text yes i can can you know i said can you please tell claire to photoshop my mail bed cuticles my gnarled cuticles no jack this is my turn to talk i just find myself this is so hilarious and it's a bad week for me because i always get called out for being k-type and being the one that's like an absolute disaster of a human that is like focusing on these little minutiae that do not matter and like losing my mind over them but it's jack i am very is going out there about my looks call t night and i can

you tell Claire to Photoshop my mangled nail beds on any detail shots with my nails? Here's my biggest nightmare. And it's not even the photos. It's this video coming up like on a massive big screen and it zooms in on me zipping a zipper up. And then all you can see is my deformed thumbnail. Okay. But here's the thing. And I think that this is why Kelty and I struggle so much with these hangups when you're in the entertainment business. Like, first of all, as an actress, I know, but this is the thing you are now bitch which means you can't have total control over what is out there and what is shown like i know you've seen what i have to wear in hallmark movies like that would be your absolute no worse name or you wouldn't come out of the trailer this is what i

learned doing lady gang tv that is one thing that i let go of is just letting it out there and not being like super controlled i'm like i'm gonna look like shit sometimes and i'm gonna have a double chin, whatever. It's fine. I'm putting it out there, but this is just, this is a Corona virus adjacent problem that I can't get a manicure. And I've been very stressed out and anxious. And my anxious habit is picking my nail buds until they bleed. And I just feel like that might not be a good look for us. Like, but you, okay. You know what? I don't, I'm not, I hear you, but like you guys my my thumbnail is so curved and crooked from my concern okay so my concern at the photo shoot was the fact that one of our samples came in with the wrong colored buttons

like those are the things that i'm concerned with like hey this doesn't have the right buttons and jack's like my nail beds and i just want everyone to please give me one moment of of cleanliness in my soul that it's not just me who's crazy in the lady gang no our guest is here so let's do it now back to the lady gang our guest today has more fierceness in her fingertips than we collectively do in all three of our entire bodies i have fallen in love with her beauty grace and sass while also falling in love with my new favorite show on hbo max legendary we're going to talk about it and i'm gonna fill you in on why you need to be watching it so basically the last episode of legendary

came out i dm'd her last week begged her to come on the show because now she's my new obsession i want to know everything about here but here is what i do know she's been an active member of the queer ballroom scene in new york since the age of 15 she's the first ever openly transgender woman to appear on mtv's america's best dance crew she choreographed and appeared in willow smith's whip my hair music video and speaking of whipping one's hair she is so epic she epic she has her own signature hair flip move the leomi lolly basically everyone has copied her guys janet beyonce gaga britney spears more on that later she was the star of nike's be true advertisement in support of pride month in 2017 which is very fitting because now we're in pride

month 2020 she's the only she's only the second transgender athlete to be featured in a nike video advertisement game changer she also choreographs and plays florida ferocity uh in my other favorite show Pose, which the second season just went on Netflix, if you need to know. Anyway, so Becca and her have a Ryan Murphy connection because Becca was on Glee, obviously. She's one of the judges on HBO Max's show Legendary. And you can sort of tell she's the only judge who actually knows what she's talking about during the show. Welcome to the lady gang. Naomi Maldonado. Thank you for having me, ladies. Thank you so much. So that's such a big intro. But basically, i want to start with how did you become the wonder woman of vogue i came into the

scene around the age of 15 i found out about voguing going to a boys and girls club called kip's bay and when i was attending that um after school um program i came across who ended up being my first trans mentor and she was in the kitchen where she worked she was the chef and she was voguing and i was like oh my god what is this like well i need to know what this is she told me what it was and she told me that she had a surprise for me so a few days later she popped on when i came back to kitts bay she gave me a vhs tape and in the vhs tape when i got home it had all this it had a compilation of all these trans women's competing in the 90s and like i was automatically intrigued i didn't really know what the house is or you know what it meant to be a

for me i just fell in love with voguing so my style of voguing was kind of different from what the people were used to i got shaded a lot got thrown so much negativity because i was so different i was i was being a trans woman in the borrowing scene they're used to seeing the girls being always feminine and really soft and not really being outgoing and like really getting out there and getting their fingernails dirty and i was the type where i'm like i have four brothers i'm the only girl like i've always been tough so coming into the scene and learning how to vote it was more athletic for me and that's how I got the name Wonder Woman I basically you know I showed them that I was able to gain respect based on just being authentic and being myself and just

fighting for what it is to be a strong woman and being empowered empowerment and having that empowerment in yourself and saying yes I'm strong and yes I'm powerful and it's okay so legendary if you're not watching you're an idiot but basically what it is is Naomi's on the judging panel with my old neighbor la roach which is why i started watching the show because i was like oh wow um megan the stallion uh who's one of my husband's clients at rock nation so this is like such a weird world but anyway then um jamila jamil and then they have leomi and then they have a guest person come in and these houses come out and they compete in these different sort of ballroom competitions either solo or as a group and then they either get cut or you know

they get to be the superior house it is so fantastical it is so bright it's so creative it's there's so much energy and you can tell that these competitors are fighting for their lives during the competition like how much this opportunity means to them so i know that you were originally asked to be a house mother and compete on the show and then you were like no bitch the wonder woman of vogue i could judge the show amazing yeah when they when they reached out to me it was about two years ago when they first started on the project and when they first started in the project it was out in the west um of course everyone who has gotten into ballroom they know that ballroom started in new york so um i felt like they kind of figured out was like we need

the people from new york we needed to be you know the real deal and so they reached out to me and at first they wanted me to be a part of the competition for me I have my own house but my house is not as ballroom affiliated as other houses like my house is more so a family I really stuck to the trueness of why the houses were created and yes although my kids do compete that my kids are more like performers they're not into other categories so for them I felt like it would have been a little tough I honestly also didn't want to be on there as a parent I felt like I've been there I've done that and for me my journey and my passion has come from like just loving what I do I don't want to be there to be like become more famous like get money like I've been able to have an amazing experience

I've been able to have you know such such an amazing experience with sharing my talent so when they came back to me because at first I wasn't going to be a part of the show I was like no I don't want to be a mother you know I'm good I'm okay and it was like no this is like an amazing an opportunity but then when he came back around he was like listen we got picked up for hbo max and we would love for you to be a judge they and they was like like you know we need you like being a judge for you to be a judge on this on the show is gonna be like so authentic you're the one who i not only have i been a part of the ballroom but i've had to literally fight to become who i am now and to be respected and to become and to be given the title legendary or to be given

the title iconic i had to really really work hard i wasn't like i was somebody's friend and i got you know a golden ticket no i really worked hard and honestly my story it it's the most that coincides with what ballroom is and i feel like with me being on that panel and me being able to put give give them what i had to put in to get to where i am i feel like that's beautiful i was on America's Best Dance to where you know they I was disrespected on that show I was you know I had a horrible time on that show and I feel like a lot of the focus was on my transness and that was something that for me it's like yeah they used you as a prop yes and for me I'm like I'm not out here screaming I am trans I am trans and yes I am proud of being a woman of trans

experience and I will be out here fighting for my brothers and sisters and but I didn't want to be on a show feeling like, oh, this is a handicap card. I wanted them to really get into me as an artist and really get into the fact that I have something to offer outside of just my story. And that's what I bring to the show. I want to show people that, you know, I can give you constructive criticism in a way where it's going to help you grow. A lot of times people get stuck in like saying the truth, but they don't know how to convey it and how to do it in a way where you're planting a seed. I don't want to tarnish your, I don't want to tarnish your future. I want to plant the seed. I want to help you grow. I love this. And you really are so good. The fashion

that you're wearing on this show, the looks are so incredible. I want to ask you this. I am a like really basic bitch. Like I'm a real basic loser, right? I happen to, I am a, you know, cisgender white person basic and i happen to just love this community like i'm someone who pose is like one of my favorite tv shows which you're amazing on um legendary is amazing i'm someone who watches rupaul's drag race even though i know there is some beef with them stealing stuff from ballroom but i mean what is it like is it weird to you to see someone who is so i'm like i'm not in this community at all love these types of shows and do you feel like of course it's great because it's becoming more mainstream i guess but in a way like all of a

sudden i have my fan and i'm like it's tens across the board and you're like hey bitch like you don't even know what you're talking about like how do you balance that for me the difference between appropriation and celebrating someone is knowledge educating yourself a lot of people like yes when you see a ball happen when you watch legendary when you watch pose you see them attend these things they look like events look like parties anyone is going to want to attend a party anyone is going to attend want to attend an event but they need to understand that this is a culture this didn't just happen just because oh we want to we want to have fun we had to create houses we had to create ballroom because we weren't being celebrated for who we were we weren't being given

the flowers that we deserve so we had to create a place of our own a place of our own safety a place where back in the 80s and in the 70s we couldn't go out and be comfortably ourselves you know we had to hide we had to so this is why this was created I feel like a lot of times when people are in awe of Borum they they don't remember or they don't take time to understand why this is here like yes it's a party yes it's celebrated it's celebratory but it's a reason for it it's not like just like a happy a happiness or let's it's not a trend it's a lifestyle this is these these are we're here and my generation is here and um i'm able to pave the way for people but there were people who were here before me you know they had to fight there were people who had

to fight for our rights there are people who have to fight for us to be accepted and for us to be respected and i feel like people need to understand that and for me i'm always open to like allowing people to come in because why not if we don't bring people in that are non-knowledgeable how are they to spread that knowledge you know and that's why the show is so important and that's why it's so important to have all the different judges on those specific chairs because those judges kind of bridge ballroom into a different part of mainstream and that alone that's powerful yeah you know exactly what you're talking about you'll come out a house will come out you'll say it was great but this is a voguing challenge and i only saw one of the vogue move like you're so

particular um where law is talking about fashion and then megan's just like am i having a good time am i entertained and jamila is like i really don't know i love that there's so many shots of her looking at you and then when you give the snaps when you have approved what's like okay me too all of a sudden starts yeah she's definitely looking to you because she doesn't really know you know what she's looking for before we talk a little bit more about your life i i want to give a shout out i want to give a shout out to my to my dresser to my stylist because you know we talked about my fashion on the show yes honestly if it wasn't for eric archibald i don't know what i've been would have been looking like between him and greg baysmore doing my hair and

chris monkey josh doing my my makeup like i don't know i usually do good with glam but shout outs to them they were my glam team they brought leonie to life it's incredible and i i mean was it just hours of where did you do the full like four hours in the hair and makeup chair to like make this moment yeah you went there it was every yeah every single time it was at least four hours and you love that because i mean even we're podcasting in our sweatpants you look gorgeous are you you know are you like really super into the glam and that kind of thing on every day i literally i'm kind of sporty on your instagram yes i'm very sporty so on every day the most i'll put on is moisturizer a lip balm and maybe i'll throw on a lash because you

know a lash it'll turn your face into a whole situation but as far as the show like i love my dream has always been to be a model so being like a mannequin and being dressed up and put together to me like when i'm done and i'm looking in the mirror i feel so good i'm like wow like look at me i'm a girl from the bronx and they got me in all this you know situations i look like you know i look like coins so i i love it i love it it has been an amazing experience i can't wait to see in the show so good there's going to be multiple seasons around the world i'm sure it's it's so great um so this week i i do want to uh you know make the announcement on our podcast history that this is a very um landmark week for the lgbt quality um basically in simple terms

an employer who fires an individual merely for being gay or transgender defies the law that is what the supreme court um did this week to protect gay and transgender workers what does this mean to you because this is historic and this has it's crazy to think just a few months ago even in the presidential election we had someone on the democratic side that would be running for president that didn't even was gay and was not even covered by these laws it's crazy because although although this is something to celebrate because it is it is something to celebrate we've come so far and for us to for them to acknowledge our human rights although we shouldn't have to go through this no one has no one should have to go through this like it's beautiful but in the other

end trans women are being killed left around so many trans women are being killed and no one is doing anything about it they don't really talk about it they choose to misgender these women and it's become really really bad like it's so sad like at this point in my life where you know legendary is out and we just got these rights approved it's hard to celebrate when so many of my sisters are not here they can't celebrate they can't they can't benefit from these rights they can't they can't see the next day and and that's tough um about a week ago week and a half ago I took myself um I saw one of my friends post um like a fake obituary um basically saying that could have been him and I chose to post that and I honestly didn't care of the reaction I wanted

people to understand because sometimes and I realized even after posting that seeing some of the comments like it made me realize that some people don't value others how they do one you know and it's like i don't want you to value me based on me being on tv or based on what you think my value is like everyone should be worth the same everyone's life should be worth the same and honestly this is just the beginning i feel like we need to to be out there more we need allies especially allies to be out there to be vocal and to be out there fighting with us and to protect us because if we can't protect ourselves how are we going to be I love that um all right so I want to know your story you grew up in the Bronx how

did you become this and we're did you always know that you were gorgeous no I had a tough time growing up um I've always been athletic since I was young like naturally athletic I'd never played sport so I never did none of that but growing up my dad used to like really enforce martial arts into me so a lot of the training and stuff like that was really tough so I've always been physically I've always been a little more muscular and when I first started transitioning that was something that I like I fought with myself it it took a long time for me to be comfortable in certain clothing and it took for me to be comfortable in my skin i always felt like oh yes i'm pretty in the face but it was more to that you know my i felt like me being a woman i didn't know how to accept

who i was i didn't know how to accept my body type honestly it wasn't until a few years ago as confident as i've always been as confident as i always seen um when it came to me and my womanhood i've always like i wasn't really happy um it wasn't a full until honestly traveling internationally and going to all these different dance competition to judge and to teach and to hear all these stories of these different women around the world and how much they look up to me and how much my body inspires them and seeing how much my story moved them that's what kind of make me accept myself as far as confidence I've always felt like if you don't believe in yourself nobody else will no matter where you are in your life and that's something that for me has kept me

strong it's kept me at a pace where I'm always on the go even when you know I'm going through bad things um I just I don't know my journey has been so tough but I've learned not to allow those things to drown me i've learned that so many people look up to me so many people are inspired by my story and that's what keeps me going i'm inspired by people who are inspired by me a lot of times i get all these stories and um i love the fact that people when when i when i acknowledge people because i'm the type of person i respond to all my ig emails i respond to all my god because here you are facebook you know here i am facebook when it comes when i go on live i acknowledge all the comments i want people to know like i'm not just a superstar like no i'm just like

you i came from the bronx i was raised in the projects i've been homeless i've gone through things that you know people of my community have gone through and i'm just here to show people that you can make it you can be you can survive you don't have to be a follower you can make your own lane. And although it takes time, it takes time. It takes a long time. And honestly, I pat myself on the back because I have no team. I don't have a manager. I don't have PR. I don't have no one that's telling me what to do or how to do it. I've been able to do this all on my own and based on my brand and what I stand for. And I feel like that's the most powerful thing ever. It's amazing. No, that is incredible. I had no idea. I was like, oh, well, she's got to have

like her whole team let's reach out to the and i was like okay i will say this i um since legendary started i've been like literally spending a lot of my time watching all your videos and i worked out harder at the gym based on your gorgeous body this week like the videos of you in that black bodysuit on the rooftop i was like this is the most gorgeous body i've ever seen So whenever you're feeling like not great in your body, which happens to all of us, you just remember Kelty squatted with 15 pound weights on Naomi's butt. Okay. I'm trying.

I gotta be honest, Kelty, that may never be in your future. It's definitely not. Okay. So my last question before, uh, before we go to ask the lady gang, you're so great is I am being educated on my shablam versus my shawam. so i love this so i i knew shablam from rupaul's drag race and but it's a shawam and these are all things that people have stolen from the ballroom culture and then changing something else so can you clear up the shablam versus the shawam so the thing is that the word shawam it's not specific

to the movement the move is called a dip right which they recalled the death drop right but when when you're dancing and you do your zip it's kind of like a period or like an exclamation mark so when the commentators on the mic he gives the shawam as um as a sound effect right so when they do the shablam obviously when you're looking at the people who are shablamming they're actually shablam if you catch the shade oh i know i wanted to have my big i have like one of those big fans like that's how much of a fan i am and i wanted out my fan and i was like i don't know if she's gonna be like mad that i'm copying the fan from now you should have put your fan on girls your moment girl damn it okay next time you come on all right you messed up kelsey i know obviously

all the time one thing one thing sometimes you don't have to overthink some stuff just go for it okay okay when you overthink things sometimes you keep yourself from having a great moment thank you the next time i see that's a mirror message right there i know next time i see you i'm gonna have my fans everyone use it when i um when we come back laomi's gonna fix your life yes you're listening to the lady gang Okay. And we're back. So for this part of our podcast, we have our listeners writing questions and we give them sometimes questionable advice, sometimes good advice. It's like a dear Abby kind of situation. Mostly bad advice. Yeah. Okay. So our first question says my husband's ex made

a Tik TOK about my husband talking shit on him. My husband doesn't give any about it, but it kind of bothers me to give you some backstory. I dated my husband in high school, but we temporarily broke up. During this time, he dated the TikTok girl for five years before we got back together. She's always had it out for me. I previously had to block her on all social media and she's always tried to tear us apart. The fact that people make TikToks about exes seems appropriate, but is there any advice and should I be upset? Girl, you better pay that girl no mind. The man is with you for a reason. Hello? She's upset. Why wouldn't she be upset? You got the prize girl you're you're wasting your time exactly what you need to do is continue making

videos happy with your man go on vacation show up how happy you guys are that's just going to make the person more miserable there you go i love it living well is the best revenge it really is it really is and that girl's so bored that she's making videos of her ex-boyfriend that lets you know she's that's sad worrying about somebody that she was with years before that please all right so don't give a girl okay second question that was the easiest answer we've literally ever had in the history of lady gang by the way church of leomi church of leomi here okay second question and this kind of goes back to what you were talking about a few minutes ago the question is i know i'm not fat because other people say i'm skinny but i feel so uncomfortable

in my body sometimes it even ruins my mood and day when i try on new clothes or even look at clothes online I'm a professional dancer so I have I have to be skinny and toned for my job when I don't look as in shape at certain points of the year where I don't have to be I feel terrible I wish I didn't feel like this because it ruins how I feel how I act to others and my family how can I start to change my mindset well girl you need to start accepting yourself that's the first thing I mean as an athlete myself there are times where honestly I put things on and did does not look right on me. Everything is not going to look right on everyone. And honestly, that's why I can't do no online shopping. I need to go there. I need to try to stuff on myself and

try it on with different things. Don't discourage yourself. Like girl, no one is perfect in this world. You got to find a way to love yourself because if you don't love yourself, nobody else will. True. I had a moment the other day where I was really beating myself up about just not looking my best. And first of all, we're in COVID. No one is even seeing me. I know. And then it just made me realize how much of my life and my energy is wasted on something that I'm the only person noticing. Cause that's the other thing is other people are not, I guarantee you they're not noticing. If anything, they're noticing that you have a strong, beautiful body as a dancer. That's it. Very true. That's so true. That is the biggest lesson that I had learned as

i've gotten older it's like nobody notices when you gain or lose weight nobody notices when you haven't gotten botox nobody don't any of this shit except for you it is but that's the that's the pressure that we put on ourselves based on social media standards yeah and that's something that with me i'm a girl where i don't photoshop my pictures i don't do special editing i don't feel like doing that at the end of the day what am i going to go through all of that and then you're gonna see me in person and be like yes bummed out what you know hell no hell no i mean i also wouldn't be photoshopping my face if i had yours so like if i had your face not really fair every day she's on zoom and i'm like is this a shoot like a

i only drink water guys like i literally drink water that really does a lot for your skin that's the beginning of it you have to start with real well moisturized skin for real for real you and j-lo you and j-lo just the water i just talk about the water i love coffee and alcohol too much for this i know well alcohol is okay but you can water it down after but coffee no good no coffee oh we're all screwed well your skin is amazing it's lighting yeah it yeah if i if i turn to jack skin looks amazing as well she's got good skin we try okay so last question her nail beds are horrible sorry that's okay that's an inside joke with us because she wanted us we did a photo shoot leo me and i talked about this in the podcast we did a photo shoot and she was very

concerned about her nail beds being photoshopped because they were ugly but it's okay because we love jack and she's picking her nails right now because she's nervous no i i pick my nails is a nervous habit and my nail beds are deformed now i think i do that too again you know what's crazy i i'm a huge nail biter and i usually get my nails done like yeah and stuff every three weeks so i haven't spent a long time period of time without my nails until now for the covid i have on nubs look at these nubs same how do you i mean we're saving all that money think about it that's what i think of every time i'll be here chewing i'm saving money but i'm in pain i'm literally eating my fingers off

okay well at least somebody understands we have to get let her go to her life so let's do our last question last question okay lately i feel like my boyfriend has been feeling less and less attracted to me important loving little things have slowly faded away in our relationship and we haven't been having nearly as much sex as we used to and i did something i know i shouldn't have done by creeping back on him and his best friend's text history i caught a message from about five months ago when they were talking about how his buddy and his girlfriend are breaking up and then my boyfriend goes yeah that's fair i'm starting to want to have sex with other people too he then followed that up with a low-key jab at my job saying i'm tired of dating people in the bar

industry is this a huge red flag or should i not worry too much because it's just banter with his buddy first of all girl however you're feeling you need to address it with him the best things that can work in relationship is communication um you need to let him know how you feel and find out whether the whether he really still wants to be with you like honestly ask him find out that's the best way you can move forward honestly based on his his response based on what he wants and what you want you might hear something that might make you feel like baby i don't need you you know you might realize you might not need him so if you have a conversation if you um went through somebody's phone like she did would you admit like should she admit to her

boyfriend i would have brought it up i would not waste no time i'd be like listen i've seen what was in your phone what happened all right yeah also his reaction is going to be so telling if he gets terrified like and and so apologetic you know that he knows he fucked up and he was kind of like showing off in front of his guy friend yeah but then if he gets mad at you for going through his phone and well yeah yeah and you already know then you already know and then well and also i would say just to take you know one percent personal responsibility because when you are in a long-term relationship the sex does become very vanilla and this is where i will always tell you to get a costume and bring a nipple tassel tassel yeah i gotta start you know

maybe this is just a sign that you're bringing a different girl to the bed that's it bring a girl to the bed you know right it's like and that's a situation it's work it it absolutely is work in a relationship and it's something that you know you have to not allow yourself to get super lazy and so you know maybe it's time for you to head on over and get a 15 netted onesie yes and that's what it is you have to you have to find different ways to spice up you know your sex life. Sometimes, you know, your partner might not feel comfortable to tell you exactly what they want or need, but you got to find different ways to get it out there. You know, choke him up, tie him up sometimes. Yes. Also newsflash you're for the rest of your life, no matter who you're

with, you're going to think about having sex with other people. Like that's just, that's just human. That's just human nature. I mean, it doesn't mean you're going to want to go do that, but you're going to think about it. I mean, I've thought about time. Yeah. All the time. I have dreams that i cheat on my boyfriend every night with sean mendez all the time all the time all right you guys if you're not watching legendera and hbo max it comes new episodes come every thursday we don't want you to leave you're so amazing you can follow leomi on her instagram it's at wonder woman one but the e in wonder is a three so one one three r woman one we're gonna post all about her so that'll be easy to follow um thank you for coming on and sharing

sharing your light and story and knowledge and sass with us. You're so f***ing good. Thank you so much. I love this show so much. And we will see you next Tuesday. Thanks for listening. And make sure to rate and review this podcast wherever you get your podcasts. We have new episodes of Lady Gang every Tuesday and Thursday.

Follow us on social media at TheLadyGang. Follow us personally at Kelty, most importantly, at Becca, and at Jack Bannock. The Lady Gang Network is produced by Will Sterling, Steve Delamater, Kirsten Woodward, and Elizabeth Baquette. Thanks for rating and reviewing wherever you get your podcasts and tune in for new episodes every single week. Hey, Ontario, come on down to BetMGM Casino and see what our newest exclusive, The Price is Right Fortune Pick, has to offer. Don't miss out. Play exciting casino games based on the iconic game show only at BetMGM. Check out how we've reimagined three of the show's iconic games, like Plinko, Cliffhanger, and The Big Wheel, into fun casino game features.

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