LadyGang - LG QUICKIE: [FCC Censorship] On My Panties -- What You Didn't See On LGTV

Episode Date: November 1, 2018

The Ladies take this Quckie to tell you what you DIDN'T see on the premire episode of the LadyGang TV show...in graphic detail... Amazon = Go to amazon.com/shop/ladygang to find their favorite products while keeping the podcast FREE!  Fossil SmartWatches = The Fossil Q Gen 4 HR smartwatch starts at $255 at Fossil.com/ladygang FrameBridge = Get 15% off your first order when you go to Framebridge.com with promo code ladygang MyBite Vitamins = Got to MyBiteVitamins.com today to get the scoop on the tastiest vitamin around--exclusively sold at Target  Ring = Get a special offer on home security when you go to Ring.com/Lady See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey guys, the following podcast is a Lady Gang Network and Podcast One production, which means it's going to be awesome. It's time for a quickie. Podcast One presents The Lady Gang, the Hollywood girl posse with Lady Gang Quickie. Here's Kelty Knight, Becca Tobin, and Jack Vanek. Let's make this quick. Hello, hello, hello. Welcome to the Lady Gang Quickie, Quickie, Quickie.

Oh my God. I've never seen that much energy out of you in my entire life. You never watched Glee, did you? No, I didn't. Not once. Y'all are really insane. So Becca, what's the purpose of this quickie?

The reason I'm really excited is this. We've decided, as much as we possibly can with our schedules, we're really going to try really hard. Can't promise every week. We'll always deliver a quickie. But we're going to try to recap the episode from our TV show,

the following week so on sunday you guys watched our premiere oh my god of lady gang on e at 10 30 but if you have direct tv it's at 7 30 on the west coast that's an important yeah if you can't stay up until 11 which i certainly cannot you can watch it on direct tv if you're on the west coast yeah it's 7 30 oh yeah only on the west yes so okay so what we're gonna do is we're just gonna like have a little recap because you guys tweet us questions you guys make comments about favorite parts and like we shoot hours and hours and hours of footage that you guys don't get to see so we want to sort of

like talk about it give our scoop on the guest which by the way Sabrina Carpenter number one all star for coming in walking in blindly to Lady Gang TV she had no idea what it was number two she's so cute she's in the best outfit ever I want

I was literally going down the back of her pants to try to find you like just met her I just met her but that's how much I love those jeans and her face is insanely flawless in person i was sitting in the closest to her and i was just like i could fall into your face yeah it's just like it's the craziest thing i've ever seen the most embarrassing thing for me and i don't think people know this and we probably won't ever show it is like because we're filming the sort of podcast portion of the show in my house there's

not enough rooms to well like we're already filming when the guest arrives so we can't put them in the house because if they flush the toilet then you'll hear it so we have them in my garage set up as a green as a green wait i actually never saw it it's actually cute yeah i mean it's it's cute if you're those pictures in a garage you know what i mean like we we did our friend or our producer jen designed it and like it's got those like folding like fake walls and stuff but like you know a garage just has that you know it's a garage like we're not on floors it's a garage fine i've waited in waygrocer have you yes because i'm feeling kind of guilty that's why i was kind of tweaking when we were filming because i was like she's here and they're like yeah and

they're like but we're gonna do all these other things for so i was like no just break out because she's in the garage get her out of the garage you put a dog you know what i mean yeah no she was super cute yeah so cute she was so sweet i mean i know thank god somebody believes in us enough to come on blindly like that and also can we discuss the best game ever which normally the guests are going to play the games with us, but since Sabrina's 19 years old, we didn't think it was appropriate for her to play Desert Island Dick. I'm sure she wanted to.

That's who's laughing, you guys. She's a sass. She's sassy. But I understand. We weren't going to peer pressure into Desert Island Dick. No, we didn't even ask her. She wasn't even like, no, I'm too young or I'm too innocent. We just didn't even ask because we just don't want to put her in that position.

But most of the time, we're going to have the guests play the games with us. It's not always Desert Island Dick, so stay tuned. They're good. But here's my question for you, Becca, is that Jack and I had a real realization that we couldn't dive deeply into during the show. Like, you're of a certain age when Harry Potter was at its, like, highest level. So I'm just so confused. I was actually discussing this while I was working out with Rebecca, the makeup artist, today. And I was like, I don't understand, like, how Becca didn't read or see any Harry Potters.

Like, you didn't either, Sammy? I haven't read or seen hello well your mic isn't on so if you want to be a part of this quickie then you're going to have to put your mic on Sammy basically was saying that she hasn't seen but like how did you miss that

I didn't miss it you didn't even try to read a single book I did try to read the book shut up I read all the time I'm a voracious reader voracious is that like a preamble you know they were asking us

they're like did they ask you to they're like what words what word did you pronounce wrong bagel bagel they didn't use any of that no we were talking about the bagel emoji and kelty kept calling it a bagel so then they kept asking or they asked me what other words she pronounces wrong or uses wrong like please hold on don't go to bagel i went to mimosa worse hold on jack jack pause this we're still in harry potter somebody's name is wendy she calls him wendy okay how did you miss harry potter i didn't miss it i chose to bypass it but why here's why you guys i really don't like watching or reading anything that is fantasy wait you don't watch game of thrones do you oh god no okay thank god i watched the first although i did watch the first

three seasons i did too and then i was so over it okay thank you i have a very hard time i have a very hard time with you're not at close to your mic at all okay hello there you go thank you becca's first podcast hello she's like i just i don't know can you sit by there are people out there who i don't like alternate reality i like this reality i like this i like to read things about people who are real or who could exist in this world you don't think fiction not fantasy yes fiction so you don't believe there's muggles muggle yes there are that's just a normal person right so like that's so hard for you to believe that there's normal people that are non-magical walking around i believe there are muggles i don't know that's a hard question you don't

believe that they're wizards you don't believe in muggles you don't believe in like dumbledore i don't even know you know who voldemort is do you know who voldemort is voldemort's a bad guy you can't say his name it's like what we used to call the vampire it was and your ex-boyfriend and my ex-boyfriend. No, I just... I feel sad for you because I don't... Don't be sad.

I'm thrilled. No, I don't like fantasy either, Becca, but Harry Potter is really special. Will you read it to me? I'm not reading it. Get it on Books on Tape.

Will you try one? No, I already tried The movies are so good, too. No, I fell asleep watching the first movie. Oh, my God. They're so good. Okay, now we can move

on to Bagel. I love them. Disappointed in you. It's okay. We also talked about Amy Schumer and her pregnancy. I'm excited for Amy,

although... Pregnant? Where is Amy? What do you mean, where is she? She's in New York. She lives in New York now. We listened to a really good... She was on Dax Shepard's podcast.

She did a great interview. She did? Yeah. Great. Well, because she got so much backlash for... I Feel Pretty. I Feel Pretty. Oh, yeah.

And she handled it quite gracefully. Yeah, but I don't think that was the purpose of the interview. No, but I liked the part. I liked the part about it. I did like that part, too. I just listened to an amazing podcast, The Goop Podcast. um gwyneth paltrow did this interview about her perfectionism and it was so good if you're a perfectionist or a three on the enneagram you should listen to the i went to a goop event in

nashville yeah holy shit it was amazing tell that she she wasn't there you can tell that she she signs off on everything and her team was saying that she's involved in everything every graphic every tablescape every like every single thing for an event for whatever it is like they she's 250 employees yeah but she still shows up every morning she signs off on everything she also checks everything that they like this vodka company came in as like a uh partner for the event she they it goes through like rigorous testing to for like no artificial stuff no like they will not partner with anybody who's doing anything that's not like organic goop worthy that's pretty cool i also love her cb2 line i haven't had it used it it's cb2 like by design

yeah they did goop and cb2 to the club she's like what oh yeah her cb2 is good okay what else oh can we talk about ed yeah oh god okay so ed sharon was on our first episode okay wait wait here's something that didn't get uh cut into the show the fact that you said to ed you're like i have a new show my new show my show me and i were not mentioned once not even once not once well here's the truth guys i had to rope ed a little bit into doing the show and i was a condom a little bit i conned him a little bit i was like ed after all these years i have my own show and that's how they hit you probably thought it was like an oprah yeah i think he thought it was like a graham norton or whatever in the uk like the kelty night he's like

oh so the kelty night show and i was like well it's called lady gang correct him i explained it to him they didn't they weren't rolling but i explained i was like it's called lady gang it's with these two other girls but like they weren't rolling but the thing is is that i always i always prided myself when we got married that i was never one of those people like brides it was like at my wedding yeah i was like our wedding our wedding like always so the fact that i've now turned into a bridezilla at lady gang tv and i'm like my show i really feel bad i want to apologize i mean we don't really give a shit at all it was just it was a very high pressure thing it was just your show because then it would be wild and i wish i just know

here's the thing i wish the kelty night show was like a big brother that just was like no oh my god it was just me being insane like the Truman Show yes the Truman Show oh my god yes I want someone please some executive out there give Kelty her own like Barbara Walters style

show but don't but everybody's an actor it's like oh my god this would be so incredible but no Kelty your show did really well this weekend I'm really happy you asked us to be a part of it Thank you so much.

I love being here and playing. Ed was actually the first person that signed on, which I thought was cool. We asked him, and he was like... And he's so cute. And it was like, yeah. He was so cute. And I think you really like... We wanted to have celebrities, but we wanted to show sort of a different side of them,

and I did. And also, what people didn't get to see, I hope they posted, was that my song wasn't just that one verse that was shown on television. I hope they didn't watch it. It was a full three-minute song. It was. It was long. A start to the finish.

Can you imagine what he was thinking the first time? I know. you made him sit through three okay you okay by the way culty only got four minutes with ed it was a very strict four minutes and you spent three minutes of that playing your song yeah you sure did honey and my singing voice was like you know how many times i practiced in the car i was like i'm gonna sing for ed sheeran i'm just gonna go out to the world i can't believe you did that that's my worst nightmare is singing on tv yeah she did it voluntarily in a canadian tuxedo. I liked the Canadian

tuxedo. My hair was cute that day. It was good hair. It was good hair. Did you get it done or did you do it yourself? No, I had a fresh extension. Now my extensions are a little gummy so they're sticking together like noodles. They're like noodles. Yeah. Ramen noodle hair. The Lady Gang. What else happened that they didn't wear? The tour bus

segment. Oh man, we had so many gems in there. That day was so long. Crazy. Okay, by the way, it was so hot. It was like 100 degrees. I wore a polyester shirt as usual as usual

they didn't show us taking the whole tour bus through the Chick-fil-A drive oh yeah and trying to find me a man it was so good yeah we got a nugget platter

well we bought $150 worth of Chick-fil-A in one sitting and we yeah ate most of it so much

I remember seeing a photo of that platter yeah it was delicious and then we screamed at the guys working at Chick-fil-A to follow us on Instagram which they did

yeah I'm sure they since unfollowed yeah or muted most likely and then there's all those people you know at the Chick-fil-A on sunset there's like outside seating and so we came through the whole thing in the van and we're

like you guys want to see some famous people i'm like take a picture tourists no one did they cut a lot of the people taking we're like you better take a photo we're about to be so famous and people like listened and they took photos of us when we were hollywood boulevard they cut a lot of that out I bet that we got like 10 photos of us taken that day by people that actually thought we were famous the most disappointing edit for me

in the entire show is that my mom's Johnny Depp story didn't make it in you also told that on the podcast I know and I understand my mom went down to Hollywood Boulevard she saw the Captain Jack Sparrow actor

she thought it was Johnny Depp she took a picture, she posted it on Facebook for Canada Duh, all of Canada and the friends thought it was really Johnny Depp because mom wrote, met Johnny Depp. Did it look like him? It was Captain Jack Sparrow, so it was like... Well, I guess it was mostly like him. That guy does look like Johnny Depp. He is an excellent Johnny Depp not to look...

It's not hard to look like Johnny Depp. Can I say that? Wait, your friend hooked up with the Johnny Depp impersonator? Yes. The Captain Jack Sparrow? Yeah. Oh, but no, the thing is, is he practices, and I told you this, but it didn't air, he practices his sword fighting in my backyard. I like that he's so method.

my backyard is into a park yeah and a lot of times on Saturday morning there's two exciting things happening one is a guy comes out

and practices his saxophone which I love he's so good and he just like rolls me three hours of sax and I'm like I'm like cleaning

the toilets and then I hear like clang clang clang clang clang clang they're fencing in costume and then one time

I took Callie for a walk down in the park and was like hey guys and then they gave me their card they're like a troop you can hire them

for things so i think if later than for what for your parties for your events sexual parties whatever you need our probably probably our rap party yeah our sexual rap party do you guys want to talk about our big event like our big launch we laid in my bed wearing pajamas yeah here's the thing we had this like grand plan to have this epic premiere party with all this stuff a huge deal and then of just crept up on us and we had nothing to do so we are tired and we're tired and i don't want to go anywhere or stay up until 11 i also you know what i'm really done doing lately is small talk no talk please i don't i don't i can't don't small talk makes me want to you know i have a

saying for this chris and i've used it for years talk no it's big talk or nah it's like when we're out at public places chris would be like how are you and he's like are you big talk or nah and then And I'm like, and that basically means like, I can't do any more small talk. I'm done. Like, I'll talk to you if we need to discuss our mortgage, but like, I don't need to know about your day right now. I understand. I had recently had a conversation with a guy I started seeing and I was like, I'm going

to be really honest with you. I don't need to, you don't need to text me throughout the day. Once in the morning, blah, blah. I'm not going to check in with you at night. If you feel like you need to send me a photo of your burrito bowl for lunch, like fight it. Don't do it. I don't do the small talk thing.

Burrito bowl sounds very upfront. I'm hungry. Me too. Should we leave? no we're not we have to be close no we're not what time long is it just stop let's talk about more things jack what was it like to see yourself on tv for the first time i didn't hate it that's that's great that's it wow could be let's say like we all looked okay we all looked good like i fish yeah i mean i'm gonna say one thing i really hate is like when you're used to seeing

yourself on tv acting uh-huh it's a you're it's a more controlled environment so the like like laughter spontaneous laughter where you have a double chin yeah yeah does not happen when you're acting true yeah if it does it's it's a choice right that's a strong choice choose my choice yeah however in this show i'm out of control and my emotions are out of control And we're also a little bit drunk. And I'm a little drunk, so I can't really temper. So my double chin upsets me. Yeah.

Sometimes I look like I have no neck. What shirt were you wearing? Black. Oh, you weren't wearing a high neck, though. No, I'm going to start, like, Steve Jobs every week. It's the best thing you can do. See, for me, I felt like I looked better than I was expecting. I thought I looked better than I was expecting.

Because I, like, when I look in the mirror, I feel like an ogre. And that day I felt like kind of gross. And I was like, there's no, I'm not going to look cute. And then on TV, I was like, I think it has a lot to do with our excellent lighting. The lighting was primo. I mean, we woke up at 5 a.m. I didn't drink any water, drink a lot of coffee, drink a lot of wine. I was dehydrated as shit.

So it was better than I thought. Well, also, we had like a snafu where the wallpaper we thought was going to change. So we had different clothing picked out. like last minute you know shanghai shuffle we could not wear our chosen outfits yeah and like i ended up wearing something that looks similar to what they give you when you're getting your hair color it does look like a schmock oh my god you're right it was a schmock she combo plaited schmata and schmock it's a schmata it's yiddish what you were just is it not a schmock oh my god I've been saying it wrong my whole life.

Yeah, you have, Bagel. You sure have, Bagel. You and Kelty, oh my God. I've never pronounced a word wrong. Schmock. Other than schmock. It's like schmock, but not. It is.

It's schmock and schmock. I'm going to keep calling it schmock. I like it better. Schmock. I thought you were leaving, Sammy, so I unplugged you. I'm going to plug you back in. You'll have to. Overall, what did you think of the show?

Someone's fallen. Oh, okay. I think this of the show. I think that... It was a good start. A good start. like i do wish that we could go more turbo and like we say some pretty outrageous things they don't make the cut yeah there is a lot of gold in there like i talked about getting jizz

on my tummy yeah they cut that well here's the thing i didn't want that it is television no totally but it's cable i don't think there's rules there are i mean just within the network yeah i mean they don't want us talking about like ejaculation it'll keep people coming to the podcast because they know that we'll talk about jizz on our tummy yes on the podcast i stomach can you say stomach i hate it but i kind of love it it reminds me of tummy sticks jizz and tummy is a whole mind no because tummy is like a child a child and you're talking about jizz so you say you jizz on my stomach or you have a tummy ache you do not that's why i'm like it's like pan it's like yeah it's panty i hate panties yeah or like well panties is just gross

in its own way but it's undies it's like you got jizz on my undies i like tummy with jizz jizz on my tummy jizz on my tummy a story about becca tobin wait i actually um have the title for my next book what is it god well i have two titles yourself yourself is so good i have two books already they are my third yeah self-published they're self-published say we just died a little okay anyway okay in my spare time i just write novels okay holy shit okay so here's the two titles one of them i just came up with this week which is be yourself but change everything about you that's great because that was really the mantra i've been living through yeah by making a television show yeah it was like we want you

we just want the lady gang just be authentic but like change basically everything about yourself the other one is Kelty Knight tries too hard that's good you already I think you've said that before yeah wow those are great yeah like those are really good

I hope people don't steal them what should mine be Becca Tobin jizz on my tummy hashtag jizz on my tummy or in my panties I honestly can see the book cover of her jizz on my tummy it's like that emirata photo no yes Wait, which one?

With jizz. Yes. Here's how I see it. No, but we'd add it for her. The Emrata torso photo? Yeah, the torso photo. I see it as, like... Didn't Jennifer Lawrence have jizz on her tummy in those sex photos that got leaked?

Oh, like the family ones? Someone had jizz on their tummy. Stop saying that. It's so... That's what the title of this episode's gonna be. It hurts my stomach when you say that. Does it hurt your tummy? Guess what, everyone?

We're out of time. Oh, thank God. jizz on my tummy she's making a note I'm making a note that I want that to be the title of this episode I don't think you're

going to be allowed to write that no it should be a jizz on my tummy what you couldn't see on first episode of Lady Gang TV yeah

okay but thank you for watching the first episode of Lady Gang TV we'll be back can you please make the socials go ham yeah keep us on air

because honestly you guys are like lost in that secret Facebook group and no one from the network sees that shit so go over on the Instagram

get out and show your beautiful faces step outside Support us, girls. We need your help. We're struggling. But watch us Sunday nights at 1030 and follow Jack Vanek at Becca at It's Sammy LA at Kelty at the Lady Gang at Lady Gang TV at E! Entertainment at Kim Kardashian West.

And now we'll go to see you next Thursday. See you next Thursday for a quickie. Jizz on your tummy. We weren't here for a long time. Oh, we're here for a good time. We did the wrong tagline. Goodbye. That escalated quickly.

Thanks for joining us on Lady Gang Quickie. Check out new episodes of Lady Gang every Tuesday and more quickies every Thursday on PodcastOne.com, the PodcastOne app, and Apple Podcasts.