LadyGang - LG QUICKIE: JERI RETURNS

Episode Date: November 19, 2020

Jared Monaco, aka Jeri, is back and better than ever!!! In typical Jac fashion, she totally goes off script and turns the episode into a Q&A sourced from questions from the LadyGang gals themselves. Jac & Jeri talk about engagement plans, why men suck at communicating, and what Jared really thinks about Jac smooching his friends back in the day! Check out our amazing sponsors!!! Modern Fertility: Get $20 off the test when you go to ModernFertility.com/ladygang  Rothys: Check out all the amazing shoes, bags and masks available right now at Rothys.com/ladygang  Stamps: Sign up for Stamps.com with code LADYGANG to get a special offer that includes a 4-week trial PLUS free postage and a digital scale. No long term commitments or contracts. Click on the Microphone at the TOP of the homepage and type in LADYGANG. WooMorePlay: Go to https://woomoreplay.com and use code LADYGANG for 20% OFF your order of WOO Vibez today!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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wearfigs.com and use code figs ca for 15 off your first order that's wearfigs.com code figs ca it's time for a quickie podcast one presents the lady gang the hollywood girl posse with lady gang quickie here's kelty knight becca tobin and jack vanek let's make this quick hello hello hello and welcome to the lady gang i am jared aka jerry and i'm sitting here with jack good job you did it on the first try yeah i know we thought i was practicing in front of the mirror Were you? I mean, we thought we'd switch it up and have Jared introduce it because, you know, when we did the last solo episode with you, everybody commented on how soothing your voice is. You have a voice for podcasting. That's crazy to me because, you know, that thing where when you hear your voice back, it's like, oh, yeah, always way like I'm so, I don't know, anxious to hear my own voice.

Yeah. So, well, if you're not used to it either, I still can't listen to any of our podcasts. I mean, you edit our first degree podcast and I've never listened to it once because I can't stand the sound of my own voice. I sound like a fucking idiot. Yeah. I listen to your voice professionally for like two hours every week. But what do you think of my voice? Do you think I have a soothing, beautiful voice?

I think you do. Yeah. I love your voice. Thanks, Jared. You're welcome. Okay. So for this episode, we're each doing our own solo episodes with our partners. Kelty already did hers with Chris.

she sent in a bunch of questions that we're supposed to answer but i feel like i wouldn't be me if i didn't just completely screw the whole format of it up and just do my own thing right right so we've been gathering some questions from the facebook group and then from my instagram because i just think you know gotta switch it up gotta make it interesting are you ready i'm nervous this is like a jack and jerry q a i know i gotta i gotta get like excited well we got our drinks do you want to set the scene like what what does this look like for us right now we're in our living room yeah we just finished decorating it for christmas we're not we're not finished we're like three-fourths of the way finished i feel like we wanted to get an early jump on it

yeah it's uh it's vibey in here the lights are low we're starting to vibe i do have to say that it is so nice to have a partner that is as festive as i am like i don't feel like i am dragging you around when we like we went to michael's today we went to home depot we went to like all these different places to grab some decorations and you enjoy it just as much as i do no it's a nice basic saturday yeah we're basic bitching we got brunch oh so nice yeah now i feel festive i know we're in the festive mood so i thought it's a perfect night to do this uh this little quickie so i'm gonna start it off we're gonna just like answer some of the questions from our lady gangers and the question that i want to start off with is from caitlin and she says what's the funniest

thing that has happened in your relationship and we don't need to like think about some crazy thing from the past we need to talk about last night do you know what i'm talking about we need to talk about we were going to dinner we were driving home yeah i was driving jared was driving home and we got back into our parking garage at the apartment complex yeah and i i have this thing where anytime i see a golden retriever in public i kind of freak out well you you're the same as i am with french bulldogs i'm like a smushy and you're like a goldie boy so you know every time i see a goldie boy i like i kind of freak out and i'll be like hey jack look you know just like you know so we pull into the into the parking garage and we're like almost back to our parking

space and i see one and i'm like oh my god a floofy boy and i keep driving and we realize it's just somebody's suitcase and it's sitting next to like this woman who was like loading her car but the way that you did it you're like oh my god oh my god a floofy boy and then three seconds later you're like it's a bag it's a bag oh my god i need to get my eyes checked i mean i thought i was the one with bad eyes but it was just such a disappointment i understand because if i thought that i saw a smushy like a cute little smushy boy and then it ended up being like a piece of shit on the side of the road that i just thought was in the shape of a nice dense i know bulldog i'd be so bummed i know and it was i okay so i i do this thing where i'll double down like if i if

you do okay anytime that you say something dumb or stupid you know when you when it escapes your mouth i think that you know that you're saying something stupid and then instead of being like oh my god i'm such a dumbass you like double and triple down on it yeah but this was one of those moments where like there was no opportunity to double down it was like as soon as it's like oh my god a floofy it's a bag it's a bag and it was i i actually felt a little bit embarrassed but it's all right wait was it actually a suitcase i thought it was like a burlap bag it was like a tote or something it was just like a bag yeah just a bag i mean clearly not a dog at all that was the biggest disappointment that i've seen in you in a long time i'm really sorry for your loss

of the bag dog i don't know i've learned that like when this stuff happens too it's like now i'll just hear about it all the time i'm never gonna forget that i mean and should i i sorry mom if you're listening to this we were having sex last night and in the middle of sex i started laughing because i thought of that moment and i just started like chuckling and you're like what and i'm like the floofy boy bag oh shit sure it was it was one of your best moments i have to say okay and then i have just one more question before we actually dive in to you know everything and it came last minute from my mom she you know made a last last minute question that she needs to know she's dying to know the answer i may hi mom well now this is gonna be so okay it's gonna be awkward

after my last admission but now we're going to my mom's question but whatever um my mom wants to know why are you so afraid of spiders oh man do you want to give like the backstory so jared is like the manliest man in the whole world he's like he can fix a tire like nobody's business he carries around his like toolbox he's just very you're very typical man and you are terrified of all bugs yeah explain all right well i don't know where it started when i was a kid my my mom tells me that i was like afraid of flies when i was a little kid like the fly would like land on me i would like freak out and panic um i don't know i just never got i never got over it's and it's only a couple bugs right like it's big spider like big spiders and

cockroaches and growing up in phoenix it was scorpions too which yeah those are actually pretty damn scary i would be terrified of the scorpion um for whatever reason never got over you know the just like the general fear that i had of like a bigger bug and i remember you know the whole saying like they're way more afraid of you than you are of them i didn't just never bought it you're like there's no way no way this thing wants to kill me this is a murderous insect but um we were actually doing a record um in el paso at the studio it's like in the middle of nowhere and i came back into my room one night and the guys had taken a tarantula that they found kind of crawling around outside i mean big i'm talking like like six foot i mean six inch in your mind

in my mind it's six feet like six inch like wingspan on this thing right yeah yeah um and i laid down on my bed and i was i picked up the phone and i called my mom i'm like talking to her and i look over and this tarantula is in like a mason jar oh oh so the guys put it in this mason jar and they put it on my side table by the bed and it's up on its back i guess it's back legs back to like it's like standing upright like like knocking on the glass at me yeah it's waving and it's like i panicked like i almost cried it was like i didn't know what to do i like froze yeah just like um you know it's like it just these little moments keep happening in my life that that perpetuate the fear you know like when we were in costa rica and it was like we were in

costa rica we stayed in this house that which is weird because in costa rica where there's so many bugs the house just was not sealed at all yeah and instead of windows they just had open blinds it's a whole thing yeah but there were so many bugs in this place just not down with and this was i mean maybe we've been dating for a year when we went to costa rica but anyways it was my first experience with your experience of being afraid of bugs yeah and it was in the middle of the night and we could keep hearing these little noises of little cockroaches and little under the bed under the bed yeah moving around and we woke up and i'm like jared just like get the bugs out of here and it took you like an hour to even think about the thought of doing it i was like i'm gonna

do it now okay wait no hold on now it's in the corner i gotta wait okay i'm gonna do it now it's one of those things when you psych yourself out the first time you're just never gonna do it so then i had to i had to swoosh him out of the place eventually and now i know that if there's a bug problem i just have to take care of it but that's fine all right well that's a good history on your fear of all bugs i think that just helped me like face it i feel better about oh yeah i'm sure yeah i'm good now yeah i'm sure jared okay so this is an interesting question and it comes from britain and she says how do men make it their entire lives not understanding how to communicate and i thought this question was really interesting because you are the best communicator

i've ever met in my entire life man or women we you and i communicate so incredibly well i think that's probably our biggest strength in our relationship but dating men in the past it is so hard for most men to communicate why do you think it is and why do you think that you and i communicate so well a great example i think is like if i look over like say you're texting because you have like your friend groups yeah your group text um it's always like popping off and everybody's sharing like these paragraphs of what's going on and stuff and if you were to look at one of me and my friends it's like one word at a time or like one quick little sentence or maybe not even that maybe it's just like a silly gif or something so i think the level of like openness that exists

just it's so different yeah like you know and i i ran into a lot of walls i think we'd be better off if we all could communicate with each other better on the guy side yeah i don't know i i never struggled with it and i think that's why me and you have such a strong relationship is because we don't have we don't have that blockage where it's like i'm trying to translate something for you i feel like i can just go straight to you and be like hey here's what's up um even though we're both pretty non-confrontational we're so we're both so non-confrontational but we there hasn't well no there's been like a few times where our non-confrontationalness kind of dragged a situation out too long but i feel like that was in the beginning of our relationship

and now we know how to confront things in a lot quicker of a manner yeah um but why do you think that men have such trouble communicating with their partners or a potential partner men sometimes are just afraid that like if they voice how they're actually feeling it's going to lead to maybe an argument and i think like the avoidance kind of kicks in a little bit too like i've definitely been guilty of that before in past relationships where it's like instead of like trying to like create that bridge i just make the gap even bigger by skirting the issue and not being like direct about what i'm thinking and then it's like it it keeps going and going and then you're too far gone to even jump back in oh i mean that's like textbook that's exactly what my

what i did in my last relationship and it was like i had to try to pull something out of that and be like this was not the way to go you know and i i thought i was better than that and i think It took learning that and going through that to be like, OK, I need to kind of be better at figuring out what to say and when to say it and do it at the right time and not waste time kind of like procrastinating or putting it off and trying to skirt the issue. I don't know. I've never had we've never had that sort of like blockage. Right. Like, I don't think that exists. Right.

Right. Acknowledge that. Please go. No, we never have. i mean and especially i feel like every relationship when you start out you're trying to figure each other out and you're trying to figure your communication skills out and we talked about this in the last quick or the last episode that we did where you were like almost bombarding me with how your feelings in the beginning but for me it's what i needed at

the time because i had gone through such a like a spiral in my last relationship of a push and a pull of communication and the feelings and stuff like that so i just needed that consistency so i feel like after that initial bombardment of you spilling your guts every single night and me falling asleep to it and forgetting to respond then i feel like then it like leveled us out like it got us to a good spot where yeah but i was like here's what i'm thinking oh yeah here's this other thing i'm thinking and this thing that i'm thinking oh this too and this oh also this yeah like i just i didn't know how to shut it down yeah i was just so excited i know kind of how you i know okay so our next question comes from heather and she says when did each of you know

it was it was there one specific moment or did it just happen over time jared you go first we each had our own moment right i don't know i don't know have i told you about a specific moment no i don't think so oh no well we've definitely each had different yeah ideas of what was happening so you came to visit me i basically conned you into coming to see me we were on the road yeah i think i've told this story before but like yeah um i love how you talk about it because you came out to see me in uh where we're adventura and then we hung out all day and you left and as soon as you left i was like oh shit like i have to i have to stay on this like i have to pursue and you were just kind of going home being like oh that was fun texting shad on to the next thing

yeah shad whatever um so for me that was the moment where all the stuff that we had like all the history that we had just being around each other for so long i mean going back almost what a decade before that it was like that day to me was different than it was for you because i was looking at it as like i thought something was there yeah and i was viewing you like as that when you came to see me and i think you were just like it was a festival and you wanted to have a blast and like i get i totally get it yeah but like my i think my mindset was different than yours well your mindset you were in that mindset even before i came there yeah but like we made out and then you left and then i was like that was it for me i was like oh my god that was i had

such an awesome day so for me completely different it took me and i've said this before on the podcast, but it took me. So it was interesting because when we had first met and then the next maybe couple months after that, it was a very intense, like I said, you're spilling your guts to me. It was, we're talking all the time. I have this tendency when I was dating in the past to get very overly excited about a situation before knowing anything about it. So whether that be a first date, a couple of dates without really knowing somebody and then kind of falling head over heels with the the idea of the person and the situation and having all these feelings so there was like a timeline of that that i felt that way with you that it was like i felt a sense of

love i mean you were basically like spilling i love you out of your mouth no in the very beginning yes you were no i know better than that i was not doing that i i was trying to find all the things that you could say that weren't that that implied that yeah and so it was like i just basically i had to re learn where you were in life because the last time that we had hung out you were in a completely different stage of your life like you were still just kind of running your solo business by yourself yeah all these things were starting to happen for you i didn't know where you were like i had to like figure out what you were doing and you know first like if you were still the same person which I learned as soon as you came out there that you were yeah but then

after that I had to be like okay so what like where are you now and what do you need to me that was the most important part of it was like what do you need now because I told you this early on I was like okay so whatever because you told me about your crazy breakup that you had like a year before we started hanging out again it was like my goal was just to be as transparent as I could be while also being like the opposite of what led to the shit show that you had you know and like I felt like the only way to do that was to find out um you know where you were in your own life and if i could fit into that without like blowing the wall up and being like i'm here and like you know so that was kind of like a conscious thing for me it was like how do i fit in here

without being um without changing without yeah changing me changing your life your sort of like routine that you have yeah so that's why i was texting you non-stop i was trying to just figure it out get the read yeah well so we had this like an intense beginning and then i kind of fell back into reality like a month or a couple months after that and then it took me eight months to call you my boyfriend you're just months eight months but the thing is i didn't see a single other person after we started talking so you were my boyfriend the entire time but i was just too terrified of the word boyfriend and of dating anybody else again so it took me a long time to figure it out but then then i called you my boyfriend and it almost took me that long to

tell you because we told each other we loved each other quite early and then i didn't say it again for like seven months yeah that was alarming because i felt it but then it but then i like i was like oh and like everything kind of like went like reality started to set in and i'm like wait a second I don't want to frivolously throw this word around yeah and then I I made sure that I was like a million percent sure before I said it again because I didn't want to be like you know tossing you around either so it took me a long time for that and then for me it's just been like a slow build and I think that especially we have this conversation a lot where it's like what are the silver linings of COVID and what have we gotten positive out of the situation and your

and my relationship has flourished in such such an incredible way that i don't think would have happened if we didn't have this right and that's where especially in these last eight months we've made like huge life choices and decisions where you sold your house and moved out here we froze embryos like we've really solidified us as like a bond what am i what word am i looking for a unit we're a unit a unit a unit like we really solidified our relationship this year in a way where it's like i had a realization during covid that i'm like i literally can't live without you like i cannot picture my life without you you're my best friend and i want you around all the time and i have you around all the time and you never annoy me which is crazy that's crazy and we live

in a tiny apartment i know and i i see the things that annoy you and i always worry i'm going to become one of them because you know it's a conscious thing you remember you got mad at me when we we did one of these podcasts and i was talking about space and like having like that that separation for me like but i've changed my mind on that now because i'm here and we don't have space and it's i'm realizing it's not as important to me as i thought it was where it's like i'd rather just and that's the covet thing too is like as soon as it happened we were at your parents house quarantining that was like such a crazy situation too i mean i'm in it now this is like we're going and this is what i'm doing and this is where i want my life to go and

so i and i told you that earlier i was like everything else will eventually catch up to this i gotta go sell my house and and like kind of cut the tie to phoenix yeah and just be out here and covid kind of gave that sort of breath breath to to figure everything out you know yeah and be close to each other and realize that we weren't gonna kill each other it is crazy because people People annoy the shit out of me. All right. Well, when we come back, it's more Jack and Jerry. The Lady Gang.

Next question comes from Hannah. She says, have you guys thought about engagement? I want to know about it from a guy's perspective. So we get, I've gotten a lot of questions like this just because of the timeline of how we're doing things. Like we froze the embryos before we were married. in my mind um it's just i think this timeline that people think that they should be on is kind of bullshit like you have to date a person for x amount and then you have to get engaged and then you get married and then you get pregnant and then you have your second it's just like

none of that really i don't adhere to any of that yeah and we have such a unique um relationship especially because of our lifestyles and because of our professions that um it just doesn't go along with how how our lives really work we just measure things differently i think because of the time that we have and um sometimes the separation that we have when i have to go or if you're super busy on something which all that stopped recently and i hate to keep being like and these unprecedented times and these you know trying time it's like right now the the things that i think i'm measuring our relationship by are like like you said like freezing the embryos like to me that is like it's such a giant step nothing ties you to somebody more than that no for sure

but like we wouldn't be doing that if the thought of engagement and ultimately getting married is like obviously that's on the table like clearly i think that given everything else that's happened and the order that it has all happened for us, it's like we kind of had a roadmap before I even moved out here. Yeah. The idea was that, you know, I was going to figure out my own personal identity within like what I ultimately want to end up doing out here. Yeah. And at the same time, we're going to find a way where because you remember when we first started dating, you're like, well, it'd be a lot easier if you lived like in my city. Yeah. I was like, well, I'll work around it. And then we did. And I was on a plane every weekend coming out here. You know,

Even if I was on the East coast, we were doing that record and I was flying back here. You were flying out there. It was like all that stuff was happening kind of in this chaotic fashion, but we were just trying to be with each other. So I think, you know, the engagement thing to me, it's a no brainer. It's just like, when is that? When is it appropriate right now? It's like, I don't, well, I do not want to get engaged during COVID.

That's what I'm saying. That's literally what I'm saying. I don't want to say, I don't even want to say COVID out loud because I'm so sick of it, but yeah, that's the thing is like, I don't want anything to be tied. to this shitty scenario that everybody's been in yeah and like honestly with the whole like embryo thing too it's for me it was the opportunity of time that i could even do it like that's i feel like that opportunity presented itself because we have so much downtime that i'm like okay i want to do this now and you're my forever person so what does it matter if we also like would it have

been better if we got married after one year of dating so then this would fit the timeline like that's so stupid one of the things i love the most about our relationship is that there's no playbook yeah there's no there's nothing like that we're kind of just like however we feel about a situation that's how we're going to respond to it and i feel like we both felt it was right to look at our age and what our plan is for the next five years and say this is something that makes absolute sense yeah to freeze embryos um you might be able to speak on this more but knowing that's sometimes a better, an even better option than just freezing eggs is what you were saying was. So to me, I was just like, I'm certain about you, like a hundred percent. I don't have

any sort of reservations. So that to me is taking the place of an engagement right now. It's such a serious step that we took. Yeah. And I think looking at the order of it to me is irrelevant because it's still a milestone in a relationship that I ultimately see going to that place of all of those things will have happened when it's all said and done right that's how i feel about about engagement it'll happen but it's like right now i would know where are we i think we talk so openly about it that it's like i'm not like wait i mean i've also said it like a million times you would have proposed to me like after two months of dating if you could have absolutely so it's kind of it's more just kind of figuring shit out logistically wait i probably did i i probably did

You probably have a few times when we were black, I always said, no, but that's the thing. It's like, we, again, it goes back to the communication thing. We communicate so well that it's not one of those things that I'm, you know, when is it going to happen? Well, I hope he like picks out the ring for me. It's like, we know it's going to happen. We communicate very openly about it. The only thing is I want to be surprised and maybe it should be hidden in a cornhole bag.

I don't know. I have three ideas. I've told you this. I know, but now you're so bad at keeping secrets. You can't even give me a clue. i haven't told you anything okay it's not hidden in a cornhole bag no okay it's not going to be the thing that you want so we're gonna go to see a star wars movie yes it'll be in a lightsaber we're going to the star wars disneyland park and we're gonna that's where it'll happen that's if

disneyland ever opens jared so we'll see about that okay galaxy's edge sorry i had to say the correct name i know you have a lot of star wars like experts that listen yeah lady gang well we probably have a few um okay well before we move to the next question i just always i need to shout out ccrm because that's where i got my embryos or we froze the embryos through and they are so wonderful and dr sundheimer was my doctor if anybody is in orange county looking for it please please check them out okay next question um oh and this goes along with the engagement and it was a question from taylor and she said since your name last name is a part of your brand would jared ever considered taking your last name or is he okay if you don't take his when you get

married it was awkward talking about it well it wasn't awkward i mean and this was also a conversation i feel like we've had a million times right yeah have we ever had an awkward conversation no no no ever nope uh like people know you as jack banning yeah i know that i know you is that i honestly couldn't care less same i just don't give a shit it's like well that's such an old-fashioned like your property of the other person that the whole idea in itself i don't need to get into this is mine this is my wife i don't need to get into this but um even if i wasn't jack vanik and i my name wasn't a part of my brand i don't think i would change my last name anyways like it's just not my style um we've talked about what our options could be yeah there's something

that actually with a combination of a last name maybe for our children one day so i think that they'll both live on it's gonna be a good one okay um the next question comes from ariel and she says what is one trait that you cherish the most about each other you go first okay my okay i mean there's so many things um jared is the kindest most thoughtful softest human being in the world and something that i love about you is no matter what you do you care so much and you care just so much about me and so much about just being a good partner and just showing up and a little anecdote about this is yesterday this is so funny because so many of these things tie back to yesterday for some reason yesterday i was doing this stupid

social post for this for this um tv show and for the social post i had to it was like a fake zoom coffee making class and during the class something's supposed to happen and somebody's supposed to knock on my door but during covid we didn't nobody's going to come to the door so we had to fake the knock so this coffee class is going on for like 45 minutes and jared is going to be the one that's going to do the fake knock so throughout this whole thing jared's kind of like he's pacing around he's watching just to make sure that like he's not gonna miss his mark and like you cared so much about this simple really easy thing and i made fun of you for it yesterday and we had a conversation about it and you just cared so much to do it correctly and it

just is so sweet because it really that one simple task is so indicative of how you viewer relationship and how you take part in it i got mad at you i know i was like do you not want me to help because i'm here to help you and remember you were like stop stressing out i was like i wasn't stressing i was like when do you want me to do the fake you're like lurking you're lurking around the corner your energy was like so stressful i'm like jared it's a knock i can just pretend to do it myself but like well everything you were doing was live right so i didn't know what my cue was to knock on the door which by the way this is something they could easily add in post it takes nothing at all right yeah but i was just like oh i'm also just being a

part of something like knowing that you're doing something and being able to be um super involved in it i think that's a really important thing like to to show interest in what your partner's doing and so it was like i mean i was home i'm not i wasn't working yesterday it was like i didn't have anything going on i was like okay well this is my small thing i can do for you yeah and it was just funny because it ended up like annoying you i think you know that i was like that i was like into it enough to be like i can't miss my one not but it was just so sweet because when we talked about it you're just like i just i want to show up and i i care so much about what you're doing and i want to do it correctly and like that's so it's such a simple stupid thing like

that the knock yeah but it's so the way that you cared about it was so important to me yeah well that's cute yeah yeah i think the thing about you my my favorite quality about you is that you are no matter what just a massive supporter of like not just your partner but your friends your family like everything that you do you are you're like a cheerleader like it's what you do and you're so so good at it where it's like for me I really needed that sort of growth when we were first starting to date each other yeah um I wasn't lost but I just didn't have like I guess the confidence to take the big steps that needed to happen in front of me and I feel like you being such a supporter of my band of me as an individual like of my abilities my personality all the things

that you kind of like got behind and were like I'm here for this like that put me in a completely different mindset and like completely turned everything around for me and it was like none of it was done in a way where i felt like you were um faking anything like it all just felt like you were it all still does feel like you're just like such a huge supporter of the things that you love and i know that about you because i know you're like you're a real fan of things like yeah i was telling you i am a huge fan of your band i always have been i know and that's like and i'm a huge fan of jerry well thanks but like these are things where for me it's like i don't have i don't have like the um i'm not saying you're a fan that's not what i'm trying to say i

know but what i'm saying is that when you are a fan of something you're in it a hundred percent you were like fully like when you believe in something you're in it no questions asked and like for me to have that is like such a motivator in my life in the sort of pursuit of creativeness it's like such a muse for me where i know the things that i'm doing i'm going to be able to share them with you and get feedback from you and i'm going to like hear from you directly like unfiltered bullshit right like you're just going to go straight for the source like here's what i think and you've done that like consistently and i think having the amount of notes that i have on your new record i don't know if the guys are going to listen to this but it's like i'm sending you

like, Hey, here's what we came up with today. And you're like, literally in real time being like, here's how I feel about it. Yeah. I love this. I hate this. And it's like, whether or not that rolls into the, whatever I end up doing, it's there as part of my process now. And, and I don't just mean musically or creatively. I feel like in my life, in my decision-making, like when you're in a serious relationship, you're making decisions for two people, you're in it together. And so So having your sort of like, I guess, just support in every situation that I've been in since we've been dating has like given me clarity and given me sort of, I don't know, just like the confidence to like go into situations a little bit stronger than I would have before. You know, so I'm your biggest fan. Jerry's I'm like the president of the Jerry fan club and my dad is the vice president.

okay so amanda said asked how did jared feel about you kissing his friends back in the day all right we're not gonna say who it was i mean it was any i mean who are you thinking i'm thinking i can't of your actual friend yeah oh okay i'm thinking of like every lead singer in every band oh shit like all my like oh my god this is why i never i try to i try to steer away from these all right how do i feel about it yeah i don't care i know i met you when you were all the way in it you were in like literally the scene that i was in that's how i met you yeah you know and i was doing my own thing in that realm and you were doing your own thing and it was like we came together and had like an amazing friendship back then but i knew you were coming to me every

night when we were talking to each other and you were telling me about the shit you were getting yourself into you were like my therapist back in the day for all my boy problems yeah so whatever like i was there i was kind of like in it with you in some ways because there was i was in a serious relationship there's nothing that could have happened between the two of us at that point in time where it was like i like having that sort of reservation like i was just observing the shit that you were going through yeah and like trying to be there for you yeah well and this comes from a this goes to another question that somebody had asked about um if we started dating back in the day do we think that we would have worked out no no no i even i think about this a lot because

even if we had started dating after my breakup from my ex yeah even like a couple months into that or even a year after that the timing of when we reconnected with each other was so important because i was so up for my last relationship that i would have self-sabotaged anything that we had going on right so the timing where it's like i was in a healing part of my life with that last relationship that i finally felt confident and stable is when we started talking again that there wouldn't have been and i was super single when we started talking again i could have been dating somebody yeah it's crazy the timing was crazy i didn't know how any of that worked thank god i'd been out of the game yeah i'd been out of the game for so long and i was

just kind of like oblivious to the fact that like oh maybe she's talking to somebody else didn't even cross my mind okay this is a cute question ashley says when you have kids do you hope they will have red hair do you remember so i have that app that does like the um backwards aging yeah and it does like the does like the gender swap thing too yeah so i took a picture of me as like a five-year-old and i turned it into a girl yeah because i knew that you wanted a girl cute and it was like adorable i don't want to say that about myself but you were you were an adorable kid i was saying the other i was i told you actually we were talking about this today when i was a kid people would stop my parents and they would like my mom tells the story but

they would stop her and like play make it up and like play with my hair make it up no i'm not making that up that's what maybe she was but well i mean because your mom thinks that you're like the best thing in the world yeah well whose mom you know but like it like do you want to talk about the gifted class oh my god so my mom my mom is my champion like she does the best yeah she like goes to war for me all the time yeah my whole life that's how she's been and like when i was a kid you know like the parent the parental bias for your for your child is always like probably through the roof right but i i must have did or said a word maybe that was a little bit too intelligent for me at that age and my mom was like he's gifted and then put me in this gifted class

it was like second or third grade and i remember i remember this like so clearly i walked in and the kids were like building robots and i and i walked in and i was just like i don't i don't know how to build a robot i don't know what i'm doing here and i started i remember i was like crying and i was like i don't belong and like you know my mom's going down the fly buses around your head and you just melt down my mom's going down there like he should be in here he's gifted i'm telling you guys it's just like i don't know okay our last question comes from courtney she said what parts of your childhood do you want to instill in your children i had an awesome childhood we both had i mean we're very very fortunate that we both had really amazing childhoods our parents

are still very much in our lives. My parents were always so fully behind what I was doing. I know you have the same thing where it's like, you know, when I wanted to drop out of college, even like later in life and like go be in a band, they were just like, my mom was like, if you don't do this, are you going to kick yourself for not doing it later in life? That's the kind of mentality where it's like the guidance was there. They weren't helicoptering me at all. They weren't like hovering. It was just like, if you think this is good you're at a point now where we think you're able to make these decisions like just go for it yeah that's what i'm excited for like those are the qualities that i would like love to pass

on to my to our kids you know what i'm saying i think for me i mean everybody i think if you know anything about me you know how close i am with my parents like my parents are like my best friends we me and jared hang out with them all the time they're so cool they're literally the absolute best. And for me, and we had this conversation really recently, just talking about kids and talking about being parents one day. And my parents have always been so present in my life and they've always been kind of that best friend without trying to be like the cool mom. Like she's always just been there, my dad and my mom for me, just knowing everything about my life. Like when I was listening to emo music in high school, my mom knew all of the bands and she

loves the juliana theory and afi and she has her favorite songs and anytime that we throw on a record she's gonna know who it is she was just very involved and always knew what was going on side note your mom's knowledge of emo bands and music is maybe better than mine it's insane it's crazy maybe better than mine yeah it's impressive because she also has just an incredible memory so on top of knowing everything she remembers everything that's a testament to how much she cares about what you were doing and what you were into and that's like that's the dream like if you could have a parent who and no matter what it was it's like it doesn't for me you know when i was changing you know when i was doing the bracelets my parents literally packed my bracelets in their

house for like five years in their living room if you bought a jackmanic bracelet back in the day my parents and i were packing it in their house yeah for so long they've just always been so involved and we were having this conversation recently i'm like when i have a kid or when we have kids one day i have no other option than to be the type of parents that my parents were to me like there is if i'm even one percent less of that type of a parent i feel like i would have failed as a parent because that is that's the bar that's set and i want to reach that yeah and well like how great is it especially like if you and i get to do all this cool shit now yeah and then those hopes that your kid is going to do even cooler shit oh my god wanting to be there for

That's such a youthful way to parent your kids where it's like just being excited about it and being able to live through it and trying to offer that advice, but also letting them like fall on their ass all the time and like figure it out. Like that's gotta be like such a, I have no idea. This is me talking is assuming this is what like parenting is going to be like, we have 10 little tiny frozen babies in the freezer. So I have no idea. Right. But I think that's, that's the ultimate like later in life sort of fulfillment that's being a parent that's like to me that's almost that is as exciting as having those experiences yourself i will end this with a little bit of an anecdote kind of involving this question and jared the main had a you did a live

stream show over for halloween yeah and it was amazing my parents bought tickets to it they watched it it was so cute they like told them their feedback and then this week you did a rewatch of the live stream where basically you just watch the live stream and you guys comment did your commentary yeah we do like live commentary yeah live commentary through it's the most minimal of a deal doesn't matter jared did the live stream we're at our apartment he finished two minutes later my mom calls me and i put her on speakerphone and she's like i have my feedback for the live stream so they watched it twice they watched like the commentary of the live stream which is like no like who's gonna watch that other than like your biggest

super fans and it's just so indicative to how much my parents like now i mean they care so much about me and because you're my forever partner they care so much about what you're doing they're gonna show up for every single thing that you do and they're gonna have their feedback and they're gonna have their commentary on it and it's just you're like wait you guys watched that yeah i'm like of course we did yeah all right well this wasn't that quick but we tried to make it as quick as we could i guess so uh this is how we sign off jared we say see you next tuesday nope that's for tuesday shit we say hold on i'm editing that out no you're not okay absolutely not we say we're not here for a long time but we're here for a good time good time

God. Good job. I was so close. Lady Gang is produced by Alex Ingber, Will Sterling, and Steve Delamater. Make sure that you rate and review this podcast where you listen to it. Please. It makes a huge difference. And also subscribe so you never miss an episode.

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