LadyGang - LG QUICKIE: JUMPSCARES

Episode Date: March 28, 2024

The definition of a jump scare is a tactic used in horror movies to scare people. Unimaginative filmmakers use the jump scare as a cheap method of frightening the audience, i.e., making them literally "jump" out of their seats. The jump scares of womanhood are even worse. From seeing your man's toenails for the first time to hearing your own voice in the video you took at the concert. Today, the girls are sharing their horrific jumpscares from life.  Check out our great sponsors!! Just Thrive: Go to JustThriveHealth.com and use code "LADYGANG20" to get 20% off a 90 day bottle of Just Thrive Probiotic and Just Calm! ExpressVPN: Get more of the streaming content you love at ExpressVPN.com/lady PLUS an extra three months of ExpressVPN for free!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

It's time for a quickie. Podcast one presents the Lady Gang, the Hollywood girl posse with Lady Gang Quickie. Here's Kelty Knight, Becca Tobin and Jack Vanek. Let's make this quick. Hello, hello, hello. Welcome to Lady Gang. I'm Becca here with Jack and Kelty. Kelty's on her second Celsius and it is 4 p.m. you guys. Are you going to sleep? I have a lot more life to live after this.

What do you have to do after this? I have to take all of our recordings and put them in order and write all the things. Do you have to do that tonight or you're just going to do it because you're on a Celsius high? No, I need to do it because I don't have time. Well, because one of them I want to edit for Thursday. Got it. I mean, there's things to do. And then there's all the emails that have come in today that I haven't looked at.

Can I try it? The Celsius? This is delicious. The watermelon flavors. I wish they'd sponsor. So good. Don't get mono. And then she still took a sip.

It was brave. i birdied it it's great right yeah okay um i want to play something for you do you currently have mono no okay that was a really bad timing question this came up um okay so i found something on tiktok actually it's instagram and this girl i'm gonna tell you about maddie and she's talking about jump scares and then i went down a rabbit hole of jump scares jump scare technically is when you're in a scary movie which i've never seen a scary movie so i don't know about this but it's like something jumps out at you i'm assuming it's much like in the original jurassic park when that dragon guy comes out and he's like and his like face goes really big and you jump

back you know that's a jump scare yes but then this woman on instagram used jump scare in a weird way and i tried to find more examples of it but i could only find her examples of it mitchell is her name and she is funny i'm gonna play the video i'm gonna play the video so funny if you don't follow her on instagram you're missing out i really want her to come on the podcast yeah so maddie if you're listening please come her yeah i think we follow each other okay so we do here's what she some certified jump scares number one when someone pronounces it barcelona or ibiza or paris for no reason at all what is it that you are trying to prove i'm imploring you to do some soul searching surrounding that question and conjure up an answer for all of us it's also it's

always the people that study abroad there i said it it's always the people that are like it's crazy that you eat dinner so early here back in paris in paris we would eat dinner at 9 p.m and it was okay jump scare every time hearing your own voice but especially in a concert video because you're like i'm sorry was there like a screeching crow in the back what is that it sounds like some sort of manatee that's in trouble oh and it like pans over it's just you okay nice um when you catch yourself zoning out while driving more like when you zone back in that's a jump scare because it's like how long was i out what's going where am i how did i get here that is a dumpster but it's we're all fine it's fine um coffee after brushing your teeth this feels violent this is feeling like

an act of violence it's always like oh why did i do this to myself because it's self-inflicted but it's like i i have to at the end of the day it's like a it's a self-infliction out of necessity which is the worst kind stubbing your toe every time i stub my toe i like knock the wind out of myself and i'm like are you good it's not it's not that deep like you're literally fine but there's something so inherently like jarring about stubbing your toe i hope someone will validate that okay i love her so good so much if you want to follow her because we just used her content yeah and to entertain you all hold on she's it's maddie underscore mitchell yeah sorry that went on maddie underscore mitchell maddie underscore mitchell she's so funny

everything on her i i spent one night probably two hours on her instagram i think she she's one of the funniest people on instagram i love it yeah um okay we're gonna discuss jump scares okay jack do you have a jump scare for us yeah a big big jump scare for me is any man that gets a haircut and you're like seeing them for the first time oh my god that's so true oh my god i haven't experienced that in so long because zach just doesn't have hair although the beard the beard when it does change it is a jump scare no because they look like a worm yeah yeah wow i just i hate a haircut on a man yeah i don't like a fresh cut fresh cut i'm like oh our friend tucker um is cutting chris's hair now yeah and he he came over and it was for the first time he switched

people and i was like you should get tucker you should get tucker tucker came to the house before we went to vietnam this while ago and he gave him this haircut he's like i really wanted to get the mullet cut and he like won't do it so he did like a version of the mullet and he like went to town like tucker cut the out of his hair and chris usually likes his hair it looked so good well it would but it jump scared me and it jumped scared chris like it was very short for him yeah and i was like we were both like whoa this is quite a cut but like you know tucker had a vibe it's grown into the best haircut of his life no it has to grow in amazing and they always grow in and you're like it's gonna be great in two weeks but like what a sad way to live your life you're

like it's almost like eating an avocado you're like it's gonna be it's gonna be good it's gonna be good it's gonna be good it's good for like four days and that's like oh it's getting long what a weird way to exist i think that some women love a haircut though like a fresh cut especially men with like short hair like they love when it's like like a manscaped coif like there is nothing grosser to me than a man i actually just had jumpscare with sterling k brown you know he was on this is us he's doing i just saw him at the oscar lunch and he's doing a new role and he's clean shaven and he's had a goat he had a goatee and i loved this is us so much and so i was like watching the show and then he came clean shaven and they're like it's your

publicist reps him michael um and he came and he's like hi and then i was like hi and i was like no what's going on with like a man when he shaves his facial hair is so weird yeah yep hate it mine is um bare toenails on a woman oh oh like a non-painted toenail on a woman if i'm in a yoga class it's really hard to find a woman without a toenail polish on well i've painted my nails so much that like they're underneath it you can't yeah yeah it's really shocking to me when you see a bear there's nothing wrong with it it's just it's so like surprising jarring yeah even more jarring is i have a mutual friend of someone and i was checking out their wedding photos a non-manicured toe and nail on a wedding day for the bride the bride was like remember my toes

only half of them were painted oh my god jack bannock's toes on her wedding day that was so crazy i don't know what happened like we were like they just popped off we were taking breaks to tiktok we were at a french chalet there was out there was a feather hat at the rehearsal dinner okay and we could not have a manicure or pedicure that was beautiful i did have a pedicure that was beautiful but the nails kept popping off but no one had a color in their bag and it was black that we could i know but no one had a red that we could like quickly get a polish remover and give you a red beautiful toe thank god you didn't do a garter i don't think people do a garter anymore right i think sometimes did you do a garter no no no me neither it's too sexual in front of like family

members i would have literally died died i didn't do any of those like throwing in the bouquets no yeah oh yeah you didn't throw the bouquet rude there's a bad week in my future because i'm losing a toenail right now oh that sounds i don't want to hear about this now it's hanging that's a jump scare i know it's hanging by a corner thigh but i honestly it could come off like i could remove it but i don't want to because it's award season and i might be in a shoe put a press on there's nothing to press it on to no there's like a little bit of nub that's growing underneath the nail this is the third toenail i've lost what's underneath it is it why did you lose it No.

Wait, kind of. Why did you lose it? You don't have a sock on your foot with your toe? Okay, I have to see it. Well, like this, I can like. Wait, do it again. No. It's like the new toenails.

Wait, is there a toe? There is? There's a new toenail growing underneath there. Why? Did you stub it? Because it's when I was doing Roxy Heart. I was wearing my LaDucas in my hot bevel and these toes were too long. You know, when you're a dancer, you keep your toenails very short because they can't handle being beaten down.

Don't hit him like that. Sorry, anyway. I can't wait to lose it. Honestly, should I try to lose it at the Oscars? And it's like Kelsey's Lost Diamond. And I just leave a toenail on the red carpet. So I'm taking my photos and they're like, is that? I think it's her.

And it's my toenail. Please don't. Please do it. Do it. If you want to go viral. You will go viral. You will go viral for that. Losing a toenail.

But they'll know you did it planned. If you let this be released. But it'll be a secret feature in the Lady Gang. Wink, wink. Oh my God. Anyway. I'm dying. Okay.

A jump scare for me is, um, is like having a really close relationship with someone in one area of your life and then seeing them in the alternate universe out in the wild. So it's like a lot of times Maddie had one on hers that was seeing a coworker out in the world. Oh, seeing a coworker, not a coworker. Well, coworker works therapist, but it's like a therapist or it's like the girl who does your hair or a friend from like my worst one is like when i go home to canada and i'm like in the shoppers drug mart and i see like nancy nancy who i went to high school with yeah and it's like i

didn't have any nancy's that i went to high school i've never met a nancy in my life you haven't no but it's like it's like having that feeling of like you don't belong in this universe with me yeah even even um i had even now i'm at e there's a lot of people working at e that did lady gang tv yeah and so i'll see them and it'll be like oh my god hey it's me i worked on lady gang tv and you don't belong in this e-news universe like it's so weird to me this happened to me like last month i was going to look at a house like right by my parents in orange exciting and i'm going to leave the open house and i hear hey jack and i look over and i'm like i have no clue who this is it was anna that like does hair it was her cousin that i went on anna's bachelorette trip with

but i had the contacts couldn't have been like more worse she was like owned the house next door to the house that i was looking at and i was like i would not have guessed that was you out of like a billion people because it's like so out of place it's so crazy okay do you have another one mine is the mention of a group photo the mention of a group photo yeah like when you're having fun you're at a dinner you're doing a thing and then somebody's like let's get a photo what you don't want photos of your group i hate a group photo oh i love a group and i'm always just so shocked that people want that what are you doing with them capturing a memory for what for the big 10 000 photos on your phone so like it doesn't understand photos

i don't she thinks photos are like um what's it called what's money currency she's like it needs to be useful it can just be a photo can just be for photo well i know that but a group ever just look through your photos and have like a reminisce i'm not gonna lay in my deathbed and be like i need to go back to that stage coach 2012 with the three girls i barely knew the one i don't talk to anymore and that weird guy that i was talking to like what i love it i love i love going back it's such a break in the energy it's it's like it like jars me because you're like I'm having a good time a conversation a cocktail and you know you want me to like go and fight over the not fat spot in the photo right now yeah I get it it is true it's a shake up of energy that I don't

like I don't now that I travel with a tripod in my work bag and I have a home tripod I don't like other people taking my photos anymore i want a timed tripod that's also a jump scare if i ever saw you in public with a tripod like a selfie stick all the time and then i'm apologizing like people are walking by all the time i'm like sorry but i like to know what i'm getting because sometimes at work my uh boss john will like take a picture of us in the guest and then he'll text it to me later and there's only one option yeah to post it and i was like this is literally not my favorite yeah like i have to post it yeah eating well shouldn't be complicated but somehow it turns into recipes prep cleanup and half your sunday gone factor solves all that these are fresh

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And like, especially in the moment when I'm like, this is going to be, it's always something that Jared's doing that I think is like hilarious or like something that I think I look hot in or something. And then the next morning I'm always just like, even if it isn't embarrassing, I like have the hangover anxiety. It could literally just be like a meme I posted, but like, I feel embarrassed about it just because I was drinking when I posted it. I understand that.

Yeah. My jump scare. Your perspective was different. You were a different person. You were a different person. I was a different person. Mine is going to be, I have a twofold here. um i also have jump scare when i look back on photos where i use the eye filter too much

and i actually thought that is my jump i thought that was my face um and so that's been hard for this era of me finding that filter yeah and then now turning it off um but the second one is eye photo on the mac that literally pushes us on this day yes you know what i don't need first thing when i wake up in the morning on this day in 2006 i don't like me and ryan ross yes at the celine dion show in vegas holding hands see that's why i don't take photos yeah then i don't have to be reminded of weird things because i don't think you can turn that off i don't think so and then oh it's like the iphone knows they know they're like which x them up the most let's do a collage they're like oh her grandma just died boom here's your grandma and also i want to like

with the weirdest soundtrack on the level of exes it's also like outfits I wore on tv 10 years ago that I thought were great that's the worst and and it's like on this day and it's me on the set of the insider in like a really badly fitted patterned yeah um forever 21 dress with like a studded collar and a statement necklace even though the statement jewelry is back but I was like you could not tell me and the fact that i posted so many of them being like wiw what i wore like i'll probably regret the ones i'm posting now too fine but like i really posted it for the all the world all the people i are friends with on facebook that are like this bit like i really thought that i was slayer mcslayerson and it was it was not what i wore to the teen choice awards

still give anyone a jump scare would you wear the ugliest outfit you've ever no but it was like a show us when was that what year actually I was just having jump scare memories because it's award season I got to do the glam bot again which has been a thrill because I learned how to glam bot good yeah I remember when we did I had a really funny moment I like went up to them and I was like here's my first glam bot I'd like to improve and I literally I'm like this is it oh how upsetting is that tell me that tell me i paid a stylist a lot of money to put you look kind of adorable it is kind of young ingenue for sure but tell me about picking it and what the other options were i there probably were no other options because i was a loser that

nobody wanted to dress so it was like here's what we've got like we'll make it work but why like why this dress yeah do you remember being like i remember my publicist set me up with this stylist who was actually really wonderful for other people and we had a fitting and my stylist my publicist were both there and they were like this is it this is the dress this is the one and i was like i'll listen to anything anybody tells me because i pay you guys a lot of money to tell me what to wear yeah and it gives me a jump scare of the moment though it's actually quite darling it wasn't it wasn't actually because like if you look at like look like but it's a scuba material right oh scuba material yeah that was big i think naya next to me looking chic and all leather

shut up see that was upsetting to be seen that was a jump scare oh yeah no that 20 doesn't go these two things don't belong 2013 that's not any better yeah jenna got in the scuba dress too yeah We were in, like, a same silhouette phase. Yeah, Naya looks hot. Yeah. Naya just came in, like, a cropped lip. Yeah, that was when she was dating Big Sean, you know? When she was, like...

Rapper's girlfriend vibe. Very hot. Okay. Any more? I don't know. Oh, what's my other jump scare? My side profile when I'm laughing in a picture. Oh!

Even in these video clips occasionally, there'll be a shot that I'm like... And I'll think that there's like something wrong with the lens of the camera. And it's like, no, it's just the gobble gobbling. It's just that like my neck is eating my head. Yeah. That is a jump scare. And then it makes me question my reality. It makes me question everything.

It's like, should I be in a turtleneck every day of my life for the rest of my life? Yeah. It's hard. A jump scare for me is like when you're talking to somebody, maybe about somebody in particular, and for some reason your phone is open and then you like look down at your text and you've been like voice recording. and it's like you catch it this happened to me you're like just in the nick of a time of time and you go trash but like knowing it always happens your phone just like what about the

new curb your enthusiasm that happened with larry oh yeah exactly on his phone and i'm like that is terrifying the dog sat on his phone when he's talking shit about someone yeah and it sent to them yeah it was he was on the phone with himself oh you thought he hung up but the dog recalled the guy back right when larry is talking you know i actually caught this perfect way to end but i caught someone doing that as many years ago i don't know if i told you this story um but i was at a wedding and um someone i used to work with was sitting beside me and they went to show me something on their phone and instead it was a screenshot of a very bad outfit i wore oh my god but like it doesn't make sense that you would screenshot like i never saw the shit talking

yeah but it was like it was like earlier they used to style me yeah and so like they put they pulled up a picture and then they were like oh oh yeah i was talking about how cute you looked and i was like i know you weren't because the outfit was terrible i was hosting the dog awards and it was like a pink sweatshirt with like a poodle on it and then like a poodle skirt oh shit yeah oof they got caught and they were and their whole like vibe was very apologetic yeah and but like i wouldn't if i was like actually talking about how great you looked i would be like oh my god that's so embarrassing i saved this photo because like can i look like what the are you doing you look amazing like you wouldn't like be like oh my god i was just talking about great you

look like it was clearly an ugly outfit it was thematic dressing which becca there you go don't do it i regret it now that show got canceled and it's probably my fault oh well all right well tell us your jump scares we'll do a prompt on instagram at the lady gang or in our facebook group and um i can't wait to see what jump scares you bitches we weren't here for a long time but we were here for a good time gary time thank you so much for listening the lady gang is produced by steve delameter stacy para jared monaco and social support from amy ryerson it really means the world to us when you show up in our community outside the podcast so sign up for our secret facebook group just search the lady gang under groups follow us on instagram and tiktok at the

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