LadyGang - LG QUICKIE: Part of the Gang with Jordan Hammond!

Episode Date: November 5, 2020

Not So New to the LadyGang and superfan, Jordan Hammond, joins the ladies after their 100 Million Downloads Party to discuss reality TV, share some dating advice and reveal how her supposed to be one night stand turned into her husband! Check out our amazing sponsors! Stamps: Use code LADYGANG to get a special offer that includes a 4-week trial PLUS free postage and a digital scale! Go to Stamps.com, click on the Microphone at the TOP of the homepage and type in LADYGANG. Talkspace: Go to www.Talkspace.com - or download the app - and use code LADY to get $100 off your first month and show your support for the show!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

it's time for a quickie podcast one presents the lady gang the hollywood girl posse with lady gang quickie here's kelty knight becca tobin and jack vanek let's make this quick hello hello hello welcome to the lady gang quickie i am becca here with jack and kelty and an extra special guest if you are jack it's not time yet sorry sorry you tuned into our virtual event our hangout the day before we all went our separate ways for the next six months if you didn't tune in you're a loser just kidding but if you were there you saw that we had a competition and the winner of this competition yes was going to be featured on a lady gang quickie and the winner of the contest was jordan hammond i wrote her an intro oh sorry oh my gosh i need

to hear my Kelsey intro. Oh my God. I just want to say that Jordan's scheduled time was one o'clock. It is one 24 because I've just had a retrograde meltdown. I am so proud of myself because normally I would have, I feel the tears coming. I felt the tears coming. It took me 24 minutes to get my mic set up. I was on and off. And like, here's the thing. I dropped this computer on my way out of town on the floor. And I was like, it's something I've done. And I've, I set it up here. I'm in this hotel. I'm quarantining. So I have my coffee and my ear pods. I have a Vaseline. I have cuticle oil. I have. Okay. Okay. I'm so ready to do many, many podcasts, like many podcasts. I'm so excited to have Jordan on and then it wasn't working and I could have melded down, but I was

so calm. So Jordan, thank you for your patience. I know you're a mother. I'm going to do your intro and this is going to be the best episode you've ever seen of lady gang because i'm hyped okay our guest today won the not so new to the lady game gang gang lady gang game my god during our 100 million downloads party and instantly stole the show from us she is 32 from boston she's been with her supposed to be a one night stand husband for 13 years married for six they have a three year old son named miles which i love that name she works as an hr manager in the retail industry she's an enneagram type three and loves to cook spend time with friends and family good luck with that watch reality tv and obviously listen to the lady gang please welcome to the lady gang the mood

that is jordan oh my gosh i am so stoked to be here like this is super dope um we you literally stole the show by the way like you were a mood throughout the whole show and i'm pretty sure all of our girls just wanted to watch you talk for the rest. Like they didn't give a about us. Oh my gosh. I was just there. Just like, just trying to have a good time. Like that's all answer some questions about pooping and toilets. And see, this is the thing. You and I are soul sisters. I don't, the question was, I think it was, what does Jack do the first thing when she wakes up now? I don't think you knew the answer, but you just felt it in your bones because you and I are the same. And our first goal in the day is to poop. I mean, that's

what connects us. Yeah. I mean, I was honestly, I thought, what would I do? Oh, I know. Except for just get up and check my phone. I'm going to go poop. That's right. What's it like, do you get to poop with a three-year-old son? If I get up at five 30 in the morning, I can poop peacefully. holy shit any other literally any other time absolutely not what if you have to and then and then miles comes running in like you just have to save it for the next day then he's in no i'm gonna go he's in there he's holding his nose saying mommy it stinks and i don't care i'm just like well you should get out then and he doesn't you're like it's on him it's your own fault okay sir jordan i want to just explain what happened at the party because not everyone was there so we

had this hundred million downloads party and we had a rehearsal. Three lady gang members were chosen from the Facebook group that had volunteered. And we had a rehearsal like the afternoon before. And in rehearsal, Jordan goes, what's the game? Oh man, I'm going to lose. I'm so bad at this. I don't know anything. And I was like, okay, well, cool. It'll be funny. I was like, don't worry, girl. It's going to be funny. Just make a guess. Like I didn't care. And so then we get on the actual show she crushes she wins and um and I just I just think you're so funny I guess what I wanted to ask you was how did you hear about Lady Gang where how long have you been a part like tell us your late LG history oh my gosh so honestly I haven't been a part of the Lady Gang

gang for that long um so when I started my previous job I was driving into work because before I'd have to take the train and I was like I need something to listen to other than just music So I was going through like, Oh, a podcast. How about ladies? I'm a lady. So I started listening. I'm like, this is legit because it's all the stuff that I feel people don't necessarily talk about because they think, Oh, well, I'm too ladylike and I don't want to talk about my shit and my vagina. Like, Oh, it's fine. Like these things happen because we're human. So, um, so I just started listening and it was, I don't know, it just became everything for me. And then you're in the Facebook group. Yeah. I mean, that's super recent. And that happened over quarantine. Because I'm just like, I feel like, you know, I have my friends.

But, like, I don't want to talk to them about everything. And, like, what's going on? What are these other people thinking about? And I don't know. It's just, like, it's a really nice community of women from all across. Like, not even just the U.S., but, like, all other different places, too. And everyone's super supportive. One of my favorite pastimes in the Lady Gang Facebook group is helping people with their wedding dresses.

I feel like my best self is helping a woman in a gown because I've just worn so many gowns in my life that I really understand the boning underwear situation. And when girls post, it's sometimes difficult because the ladies will post like, hey, I think I found my dress. it's between these two, but I know she should be in an A line with no lace and she's only in mermaid laces. She's found the two she loves, but my expertise is like, this is not the dress for you. That is hard because you got to be like, I pick A, but I don't pick any of these dresses. This is not the dress for you. Not everyone is in a mermaid. I feel like that would be something that you would just blurt out and say though. I know, but I'm trying to be a better person. and this is Kelty 4.0. I know. Jordan, did you have a wedding? I did. I got married six years

ago in a hotel, and it was gorgeous, and I had a view of the city, and all I cared about was getting married, eating really good food, and getting really drunk. Yes. I definitely got married, which is good. Step one. Yep. I ate food because I told my, so the hotel came with a wedding coordinator and I said, okay, for 20 minutes, nobody can come near me because if I don't eat, I'm going to be an evil bitch. So I was able to eat. And then it took a while to get very drunk, but I did it. I accomplished it. End of the night was so drunk. Don't remember getting back to the hotel room. Proud of you. Did you get married in Boston? I did. Yep. So it was definitely Cambridge but like it oversaw like the whole like Boston skyline or that's what's up

those are the only things that you should actually care about those are the important things I mean because honestly like I don't remember my flowers like I don't remember like the dresses that like my sister and my friends were wearing like I don't remember like all those small details that we all stress about like I don't know who was sitting next to my husband's aunt or my cousin I don't know because that's like not that's not what matters it's like all right we had a great day we had a great party. We ate, we got married. And then you remember the hangover, which means that the night before was fantastic. I mean, it was, it was really, really, really nice. And I'm lucky that, you know, we didn't have to take out a loan. Like my mom was like super gracious.

Like I'll always like love my mom for always like making sure that me and my sister are good. So, I mean, if I had to pay for it myself, I probably would have just had a party in the backyard, but you know, it was, it was great. I don't regret it. Um, yeah, I have awesome pictures i remember it by so tell me this you met your husband was supposed to be a one-night stand and so tell me this because often we get asked the lady in questions as you know and people are like and we're like nope just hit it and foot it like it's never going to be anything if it's like did you mean quit it hit it and quit it yeah i like it a lot more hit it i don't know what it is like you like you flick it hit it and

flit it like flit we very rarely would be like yes have a one-night stand because that's where your lifelong love is going to come from so I really do need to hear this from you yeah we need to know the story so I have to remind you guys that I was 18 so is this something that I would probably would have done like later in my 20s probably not I probably would have had a fun time and then kept it pushing but I was 18 and he was cute and hot and he didn't live here he's Atlanta so I'm like oh he's so southern I like that but he's actually from Boston but whatever but yeah so um he was here just for like the Christmas break and I I wanted him and yeah and then he would come back to visit family and I wanted and I'm like yeah and then I think you

know he'll always deny it but I wore him down I'm like I just want to be with you and he's like I don't know I'm like I want to be with you he's like no but then he was like all right I think just kind of shut me up and just like proved to me that it wouldn't work but it worked how long were you long how long were you separate um probably so so I he was a one-night stand when I was 18 but we didn't start dating until I was 20 so we were a long distance for probably like two years um and then he eventually ended up moving back here because this is where he's from so at the end of the day someone always has to move and it wasn't that point to me what is your one piece of advice to somebody going through a long distance relationship because becca and my

relationships both started long distance a lot of our girls in our facebook group i'm sure you could search long distance relationship tips or something because it's hard it's hard what was one thing that you thought got you through honestly this was a thing like if i had to trust him because i wasn't near him i didn't know what he was doing when we weren't around each other so i think if you can't trust an individual and you're not even near them then don't do it because it's not going to make you trust them even more when you're together so for us it worked because i trusted him when he was like thousands of miles away and i trust him even now like even to this day i think that's one of the things that we've always had and it's always been strong is

that we trust each other um it's never wavered i've never thought anything negative like oh he's doing this oh he's lying no i trust you so if you you have to have that trust and if you don't have it, then don't do it. Like if you don't have the stomach for it, just don't do it. Just find somebody next door. Well, and if you're a gel, you don't, you probably weren't really a jealous person or are you? No, no. You seem pretty chill. Hello. I know. Exactly. I think I'm a catch. No reason to be jealous. You are a catch, but there are so many women out there who- Doesn't matter how much of a catch you are. Yeah. And I feel like, I feel like if you're the type of woman who just has jealousy issues i'm talking to you scorpios out there i'm a scorpio though you are

not i am my birthday's november the 7th oh yeah you are you don't really fit the bill i gotta be honest i don't think i'm your stereotypical scorpio you're not you're not like my girlfriends who are scorpios will key men's cars if they think that they have like looked in another direction of another woman. Like they are, they are the most passionate. Is that how I'll say it? That's creative. But if you know that you're that girl, I think long distance is never going to work for that girl. No, no. Even if you're dating like the best guy in the entire world, like if you're set up to think that way, like it's doomed from the start. Long distance is not for everyone. When we come back, we're going to get to know Jordan more. Hi, I'm Barbara, aka your nursing

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code figs ca for 15 off your first order that's where figs.com code figs ca or we're going to find out if she's a kelty a becca or a jack we already know the lady gang we're back actually during your meltdown Kelty Jordan was like I feel for Kelty right now because I'm also a type A and I would get so flustered and I have to talk myself down and then also before the interview Jordan I guess was talking to Alex and she was like do I need to prepare anything like is there anything that I need to do to come prepared so we know who she is Kelty yeah I mean I don't know maybe that's just a piece of me maybe I'm all three maybe all of us are a piece of I think you're right because I think that your chillness about your relationship is probably very much like me. I'm pretty

chill in all relationships. Where you're like, I wear white pants, bitch. Don't break up with me. You know? Oh, you're calling it back to the book. I get it. Okay. I'm calling it back to the book. Like Becca's like, oh, you don't want me? Cool. I'll find someone else. Like that's not how I am. I'm like, you don't want me? What's wrong with me? I'll change everything. I think I used to be like that when I was younger. Now it's like, all right, If you don't want to hang out with me, if you don't care why I'm like, I don't care about you either. Let's, I don't have the time.

I don't have the time. That's how it was too. The question I was about to ask is having a son. So I have this theory in my mind about why I grew up to be overly confident in white stretchy pants. Like, how did I become like, I thought I was Giselle walk the streets of Marietta, Georgia. And I'm like, God, what is it? What is it?

I'm like calling it back. I'm calling it back. I'm like, oh, it's cause I never heard my dad comment on another woman's appearance. Like he would never say that woman's super attractive or whatever. He'd be like, your mom is so beautiful. So like I was thinking I became insecure when I heard all the other boys around me talking about other girls and how they looked. So I have this theory that if I have a son, I'm going to say to him, you should never, ever talk about any other woman's appearance in front of another woman. that makes sense it makes sense like it creates an insecurity in girls i think when you're sitting

around with a bunch of guy friends and they're like oh yeah that that michelle she's super hot like she's got great tits and then you're sitting there as a girl being like well i don't have great tits and like that just starts to chip away at your self-esteem like i hear yeah especially during like your young developmental years like i can really like really fuck you up with you Yeah. So, um, do you have any things like that with your son where you're like trying to think of ways that he can be not an asshole to women? Well, I don't want him to be an asshole in general. But that's like, that's a big responsibility is to like raise, well, I guess any, we don't have children yet, but to raise a child, to be like a really good person. Yeah. Well, it's hard,

right? Cause I want to raise him to be a really good person. But I also have to remember, I have a three-year-old black boy who will eventually grow up to be a 30-year-old black man right so not only do we have to say you know be nice you know make sure you um you're on the outside of the curb and let you know the woman walk inside like hold doors blah blah but it's also you know make sure you say yes sir no sir um never give anybody a reason to to to stop you you are you are your friend so if you hang out with an asshole you're gonna look like an asshole so always look out for that. So it's like this, this thing that me and my husband always talk about that we're like, it's, it's, we don't have to worry about it now because he's so innocent. He just loves

people. And, but you know, the fact that we have to have that conversation with him is it's, it's, it's a bummer, but you know, I think it's just trying to raise him to be a really, you know, great person and fun and, you know, acknowledge people's differences, but also not judge them for it in a negative way. Yeah. That was a conversation that we had with Tracy from the stacks who came on where it's like the acknowledgement of it. It's such a, it's such a like tricky, tricky thing to navigate as a parent to like know what to say and what's too much to say. So yeah. And also like, I think kids grow up to be very similar to their parents. So you seem pretty amazing. Jury's out on your husband. We've yet to meet him. What's his name?

His name's Matt. Matt. Yeah. I think, you know, we'll, we'll, uh, maybe we'll invite Matt on next oh the other side of the story yeah i want to know yeah that's version of the chipping away situation he's going to say i can i can tell you he would say she was crazy she would not like let go blah blah blah which okay crazy i think is a stretch but i you know when i see something i want i go after it and i'm not gonna give up unless something horrible happens but nothing horrible happened we got married and had a kid so i i do want to put a psa out there for other women don't take jordan's story and follow it because it usually doesn't work out for you no this this was like i've never expected this to happen like i would have the exception i would have like met

my husband through someone else and we would have gone all these precious dates and he would have courted me blah blah blah you know i mean fairy tales are fairy tales for a reason it's a tale So, I mean, everyone finds their significant other in different ways. So, you know, however you find yours, do you boo? Love it. All right. I want to talk about reality television because you did have mentioned it now many times that in your bio, the preparation you made was like, you love reality television.

So I want to know what you're watching and what can we gossip about with your shows? Okay. So I am watching Married at First Sight because I'm absolutely obsessed. Which one? US or Australia? no i i don't watch australia i think that's just od for me like i just i don't know i just couldn't like overdose yeah it's just like too much have you try okay i'm sure i gotta jump in married inside australia is the best reality tv i've ever seen in my entire life i'll give it a

chance and i'll report back you must jack is very into international reality shows where i can't like an american i can't get into the international as much no no it's not it's well yes because i think international tv like for reality is better like the love island situation but there's something the way that they they structure married at first sight australia is fucking insane so highly recommend but anyways continue i'll try it i'll try fine fine um so married at first sight i'm watching that um i did i haven't watched the bachelorette in like a long time but i had to start watching clear season and it's already bananas and i love it so much are you a spoiler reader or are you you go in no i i i don't know what i i heard that things get really weird um

so i want to see how weird they get and what happens i have no idea like how weird so i tried to stay with that as much as possible so tbd for me nobody's i'll just say i saw that dale guy like i'm not watching the season the bachelorette i'm i'm on to other things um and okay kelty she's so elite yeah no i'm not saying you shouldn't you can do whatever you want it's just it's been hard for me because dancing with the stars is on at the same time as the bachelorette and like i can't there's too much pressure to keep up with too many shows that are not like just bingey so that's what dvr is for because i watch bachelorette on dvr because i can't i have to watch i'm not married i have to watch dance with the stars live like yesterday i was getting

my hair done because i wanted to look good during an audio medium but whatever um wait a minute like everyone just could be listening not looking at me so then i feel my hair whatever you guys jordan look gorge you do look gorge the listeners it was worth every moment but no i was there and i was like i have to see aj dance i have to see aj dance if i if i miss his dance i'm going to be really upset but i caught it right before i left the salon are you sexually attracted to aj like we are so i am a bsb stan and i have been my sister would always make fun of me and when back at my parents house i would have pictures of aj just all over my wall looking crazy we went i went to the backstreet boys concert last year and i was

screaming bloody murder you would thought i did not have a husband and i was trying to go find aj it was it was great that's amazing so yes absolutely i'll tell you something i had my niece and nephew over this weekend um for you know just to like hang out and my my nephew loves to dance like loves it and he the only game he wants to play is dance battle and he's like auntie kelty let's dance battle and then he but he doesn't know any of the music so he's like he asked his sister like what's a song i like what's the song i like and she's like well you like the backstreet boys there's nothing more awkward and he's four so it's very similar to your son's age than having a four-year-old do a dance battle with you and mouth the words

am i sexual i was like oh this feels okay let's move on to the next subject creep that's pretty amazing do you want is that who you're voting is that who you're wanting to win this season of dancing the stars absolutely because i'm a stan but i also am obsessed with me and just like how like his dance last night was so ridiculous like what he's good so he's good he can be second place for me but I really want AJ to win yeah I mean it's looking it's looking very stiff that competition yeah I don't know honestly like I feel like right now it's like anybody's game because everyone's doing so good like I would never think Nelly is was doing as good as he did but he did really good like everyone's

doing so good and Chrishell's like she's doing really good now and oh it's hard but AJ I'm voting for you multiple times. I can't believe Nelly's bad attitude that after that one, uh, episode, like a couple of weeks ago where they, they gave the scores out and then they came back for elimination. And when they got, they announced him as staying and he had this look on his face, like he was so mad that he was picked to stay. So we had this theory going that he had asked the producers, like, I'm out, like I'm done. This is really hard and grueling. And then they kept him on, but then it turns out he was so pissed because he didn't like his scores. Oh my God. I loved it so much. I was like, in my mind, Nelly is so over this. He's too cool. And then what

really happened is that he's so invested that he just couldn't even save his face. So he thought that he did a phenomenal job and his scores just didn't reflect what he thought of himself. I just, I just love him so much. Like I, I, I love him so much. Like this is Nelly who wore like a band-aid on his face for his like friend that was in jail for like four years like he's intense you know and he's like uh bruno give me a six what the like i love this for him i mean i would be mad if i got a six like if i'm a star and i've been like doing like so awesome like i'm getting a six like i've always gotten like tens everywhere i go because i put in the work so they're like nelly your shoulders are stiff um well jordan we've loved having you on the quickie

um you're you you are a mood um what do you want to promote use your swipe up I have nothing to promote I legit don't have anything to promote no I don't want to promote that either yeah you do I don't I just want to promote everybody to be kind to each other we're going into a really like weird time and everyone should respect everyone's opinions and you know we don't need to be divided at all like let's just all be friends and talk and respect each other's opinions and you know let's all go get a drink you don't have to be that serious that is such a nice tagline it is nice all right well we weren't here for a good time we're here for a good time we're here for a meltdown bye bye lady gang is produced by

alex inberg will sterling and steve delamater make sure that you rate and review this podcast where you listen to it please it makes a huge difference and also subscribe so you never miss an episode and if you really love the episode we want to hear from you on our social media channels at becca at kelty at jack vanek at the lady gang but more importantly we want to see you sharing the lady gang with your friends so be like oh my god i just listened to this episode it's great okay here you go here's the link i love it love it okay thanks for listening and we'll see you next Tuesday.