LadyGang - LG QUICKIE: Sneak Peak of the LADYGANG SHOW!!!!

Episode Date: September 20, 2018

Get a quick sneak peak into the Ladies' latest venture as Keltie tells a story about how her husband has helped her learn to love her own vagina. Follow the podcast on Instagram @theladygang and you can email Jac, Becca and Keltie at Hello [e-mail]! And thank you to today's sponsors: Amazon = Go to amazon.com/shop/ladygang to find their favorite products while keeping the podcast FREE!   Fossil SmartWatches = The Fossil Q Gen 4 HR smartwatch starts at $255 at Fossil.com/ladygang  MedMen = Visit MedMen today and mention the LadyGang for $10 off your order (limit 1 per customer)   Outdoor Voices = For $20 off your first order of $100 or more, visit OutdoorVoices.com/lady and enter promo code LADY at checkout   See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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but only with the code RESET at factormeals.ca. Factor, Canada's number one meal delivery service. Hey guys, the following podcast is a Lady Gang Network and Podcast One production, which means it's going to be awesome. It's time for a quickie. Podcast One presents The Lady Gang, The Hollywood Girl Posse, with Lady Gang Quickie. Here's Kelty Knight, Becca Tobin, and Jack Vanek. Let's make this quick.

Hello, hello, hello, and welcome to The Lady Gang. i am becca tobin here with kelty colleen nice hello rebecca marie actually i'm rebecca tobin but my sister's marie i mean rebecca grace that's what i meant i'm so brain dead where did marie come from um and jacqueline pateras i can't believe i remember that i can't believe you remembered it either can we discuss that my middle name if you google it is listed as malice malice is a beautiful but like where did it come from i have no earthly idea that is very but random i want it fixed so if anyone has a wikipedia hookup you know you can change your own wikipedia right no you're not supposed to but i do all the time you do yeah because then if somebody else sees

it though then doesn't it go back like you can't just like put a bunch of bullshit in there can you know but people like for a long time i was gonna say about your middle name people thought that i was a stripper which no harm no foul do you do girl like you did dance topless though it wasn't topless almost all peep show in vegas yeah it was pasties right covered yeah okay okay i mean kelty made me change her wikipedia wikipedia once and this guy messaged me on wikipedia it's like where are you like what do you have to back this up no way yeah wait but Because they have moderator people that work at Wikipedia. They don't work at Wikipedia.

They're just people. They're just moderators. They're just trolls. Why do you ever want to do that? But people used to go and change my Wikipedia every week to be like, she's a dirty, skanky, whore stripper who screwed this guy for fame. It's not fair. That's not cool.

That's breaking the rules. What do you have to back up that fact? I think it's really funny because you can totally tell when somebody writes their own wikipedia article because it always paints them in this like way too good of a light um i've never actually i don't know if i've actually like really no you will soon i know god who's gonna make it for me some stranger will make it for you well anybody out there my middle name if you need my birth certificate to prove it it is actually not melissa it's grace yeah that is so isn't that weird um you guys i thought these were oh the inspirational inspirational quote oh god

pressures on have you even been posting your inspirational quotes to your instagram no i stopped and i'll tell you why because it's useless no you're an asshole no because what i did is i didn't i was trying to crowdsource like what people like to see it wasn't inspirational quotes shocker yeah and so i wrote like all these different polls on my instagram stories like do you want more home decor do you want more this and this and this what do people want i want to do that for mine nobody wanted inspirational quotes except for like 40 of the people and i was like well i got to give the people what they want a big percentage out of a full gamut of things that seems like it'd probably be the biggest percentage no no it was like the poll

oh like a yes or no so not even half of the people liked an inspirational quote oh okay i'm gonna do that for my instagram and figure out what people like yeah like oh yours could be like do you want more bikini shots do you want more pictures of my dress that i'm wearing without underwear thank gosh better be yeses all around i'm not doing that because i don't really care what people want i'm not going to be able to have time to make the content people want okay okay all right you're ready there's something about a woman with a loud mind that sits in silence smiling knowing she can crush you with the truth that i liked it until crush you with the truth i like feel like it's some good like sexual

dominance until the other last part okay wow great the lady gang i thought it would be fun today to give everyone an update on the television show yeah because we're like right in the middle of filming it yeah and we can't really actually tell you anything i got i got trouble yesterday for posting something yeah you did a spoiler you just hope somebody saw it because you'll know what's gonna be on the show um so far first becca how do you think it's going so far i'm really excited because i think that when we're in the midst of filming some of these segments i'm like oh this feels like the podcast so i'm really happy that that vibe is translating i mean who knows what really happens after the editing yeah but we're gonna look like the biggest assholes in

the world totally but I do feel like it it really just feels like an extension of the podcast which is all we ever wanted yeah I think for me obviously this is so outside my world I've never been on a tv show before nor in entertainment whatsoever but it's crazy how organic and easy it feels and how I felt like I was going to be a lot more nervous and uncomfortable but we're just being ourselves I mean for me I think that I had a vision in my head this is going to shock all of that i was like the most beautiful i've ever been with like my most best outfits with my best body and i was like had a beautiful um vocabulary and like all of those things and like mostly becca's right are you gonna be on a pageant what's happening i just thought like i've been prepping

for this i'm like i'm gonna have a show on e i gotta get my i'm gonna have my best hair i'm gonna and then like yesterday we were filming and i was like should i put blush on nah like i mean it really is like we're pretty chill honestly i don't think we're very precious about the whole thing no other than getting our hair and makeup done i picked out my outfit yesterday for the shoot i don't know five minutes before i left yeah and becca and i were talking about how i'm not dieting i'm not working out yeah we're not really i haven't gotten a facial a long time yeah i thought i'd be way more prepared than i am so i'm just crossing my fingers that i look okay and i think it's caught probably because the way in which we're shooting

this yeah so all over the place well yeah it's like it's organized chaos and like there's no time or to be we're putting our energy in so many different areas like that's the thing that i didn't realize is like being an executive producer it's so different than just showing up and being the talent because i'm thinking about 800 other things while i'm getting my makeup done so i'm not really there being like this eyelash is a little crooked yeah it's like no you're trying it's like we gotta go we gotta make this happen we have two segments today like yeah on top of all the other things that are going on in our lives yeah so it's kind of nice and i feel way less pressure during this than i ever did during glee about like the way yeah but the way that i

look well glee it was just like a hopeless situation because i had a slick back ponytail it was really like you look so good in a losing battle i don't not really um but yeah it was like i i think because also what's really nice is like we're creating fun segments and we're proud of like what we're putting out there it's not just about us being like models or beauty queens because like let's be serious we're not there's actually another show on e coming about being a model so like uh it's obvious why we're not high yeah i'm pretty proud of you jack like you've really stepped up into like being a television star in a big way i'm such a star like i was so proud of the other day

when we were just like messing about and we were like laughing so hard and I was like we're so funny we were pretty funny I know

I hope that makes it into the show some part of us exiting together and bumping or bumping into each other no you guys are kind of lucky

because what if I was like terrible in front of a camera or like froze completely no they even said no you're lucky I know well

I'm just kidding I'd be gone you'd be cut no they people even said I'm in contract with you bitches that Jack

is the most natural Not in front of a camera at a live event, Jackson most. Let me live and think that I'm the best in front of a camera. You're great in front of a camera. But Kelsey loves creating her own narrative. No, I feel like I'm probably the most natural because I've never acted nor read scripts before. Yeah. And like, I mean, that's your job.

And so you're great at it. No, I'm not. Because I see the camera and I'm like, come on. I'm like, let me entertain you. And they're like, can you be normal? can you just have a conversation no okay yeah anyway i'm really proud of us i think it's going well so far i think we're gonna get even busier oh yeah yeah well here's another thing kind of weird like it doesn't even feel like it's real no it doesn't at all he's like okay come on in

on friday for a launch meeting and we're like what are we actually putting this on television it still doesn't feel i swear to god the only way that it's gonna feel real is if i get a damn billboard and stand in front of it which i still don't think is going to actually happen we're buying our own bill okay so we'll buy our own billboard very good on that actually but i feel like that'll be a moment where i'm like oh shit this is real because it does not feel real well anyone can buy a billboard though it takes i feel like it takes a while to feel real i think that when we're watching the premiere of it we will we will be like well this is real yeah um or commercials like when you're watching another show and then your like promo comes on you know

what's gonna be the weirdest thing is the place i get my nails done always has e always without a doubt all day every day yeah me too yeah always e so i'm like that's gonna be so weird when you're like i'm famous it's gonna be awesome and i look like shit and they're still not gonna give you a discount because those bitches at pampered hands are like you have cash and you're like oh my god let me put in your card i see your credit card machine and they're like nope and you're like no they want that under the table my dad is so crazy that my mom used to go to a nail salon in atlanta and they only accepted cash and this was like i'll only accept cash for some reason no not not anymore middle garden over here does a lot of them well because they're a chain a lot of them

like will only accept cash for tips still but that's like different but this place was like only cash for anything you ever did and my dad started telling my mom she was not allowed to go there anymore because it meant they weren't paying their taxes oh my god i love him following the rules he's a big rule follower he's like ask them why they won't take credit cards it's ridiculous does that mean the salon's not paying their taxes correctly either well if you get paid in cash you really can hide you can hide it yeah it's literally money yeah it's like put it in a safe somewhere can i tell you something really snobby that i've been doing lately because as you guys know i've been quite busy oh have you been busy kelsey i started i haven't noticed

i started getting my nails done in my kitchen table do you do the glam app yeah well no i don't i i have a girl that i found on glam app but now i'm just hiring her myself oh is it gels she comes to my house not the same one but a different girl and she also does pedicures and she comes to my house and I watch Younger on my TV and we just chat and drink LaCroix and it's amazing

it's $20 more than my regular manicure and I'm like this is the best $20 I've ever spent in my life $20 although there's a place right here that's great Josephine's crushed it yesterday for me he was so good it's like a reddish orange but it looks orange in this light

um don't be on our show what do you mean what do you not remember the finale of the hills she had claire nails every segment is a different day and then had black nails yes like it was but that's continuity like that's an actual reality show yeah and also ours take place in different days yeah they're supposed to um in case you're wondering um but i got really weirded out yesterday when I sat down to get a pedicure and it was a guy. Do you guys have sexual... There's one guy that works at Pamper Dance and it's weird.

I don't like it. I think you might own it. I'm like, I'm going to take you to a drug-filled smoothie. He gives you boba tea and I'm like, I don't know. Oh, I drink it every time. Their mocha one's amazing. I know, but Jack, do you know they're making it in the chemicals and in the back where they remove

the hair. I've never died. Listen, it's like going to a restaurant. I've never died. I don't want to know what's going on not yet not with that attitude i don't want to know what's going on in the kitchen because it's always going to be sketchy you're always going to see shit you don't want to know and if it's not killing me i'd rather just be ignorant to it you know okay so same with my nail salon smoothie before we go to the box i do have some news okay do you have anything else to add to the nail salon conversation one thing just one thing riveting he asked if i wanted a callus

remover and i said no and then oh and then he started speaking in his native tongue to his assistant the woman doing my nails and i know he was probably like this bitch should get callus remover you should see her feet oh i get it every time it's the best i scrub my feet off anyways i don't like people touching my feet um okay do you remember like a few weeks ago um where were we we were talking about my vagina i mean every day it was with the gyno and i was like drawing it do you remember yeah um and i was drawing it and i was like i want i feel like it's not normal or whatever so chris sat me down oh my god you guys will never believe this oh my god chris sat me down and he we were having sex and he like wait this is before or after during like

kind of during like to start i'm actually we're starting because i was like i sometimes i sleep in just a t-shirt no underwear normal and he like we're waking up in the morning and he like pulls me over to him he pulls off the covers he flips up my shirt and he just stares at my vagina and He goes, Kelty, I don't know why you're telling people that you have a big, floppy vagina. He's like, your vagina is beautiful. It's perfect. It's so pretty. He's like, it's not floppy at all.

So stop saying that on the podcast. Oh, my God. So I want to retract all of my self-deprecating vagina talk. I've seen your vagina. It's not. I know. I've never known. I mean, I haven't, like, looked inside it, obviously, like Chris has.

I think what you need to do is be more specific about what you're talking about. Like, you make it sound like it's, like, this big, floppy. Like, beef carton-y. Yeah. Yeah. Like, you need to get them snipped. But I know if you had that, it would be fine. We're not judging your vagina.

No, no, no. But, like, you're, first of all, that's. So, your self-describing of it makes the visual seem like that. Yeah, but it's not that at all. That's so cute that he did that to you, though. That is really cute. Adorable. Like, the most romantic thing ever.

And I was like, oh, my God, thanks. But I know what you're talking about, like, when I have, like, a friend who has a little teeny, teeny vagina. Yeah. Her slit is, like, a centimeter. Yes. And her little, like, labia majora outer lips are just, like, so, like, they could really be. Like a teeny, little teeny, teeny, teeny. It looks like lips on your mouth.

Like, so tiny. So small. Like, if you put lipstick on them and pressed it on a piece of paper, it would be the same size as, like, her little lips on her face. A tiny, tiny little vagina. So, like, I understand that's the size thing. Yeah. Like, the. But that's the thing.

That's probably the smallest it goes. And then there's this gigantic range in between the two. But, like, we're just, like. Well, and I think for sake of dramatics on the podcast, I may have oversold my floppiness. Yeah, you have. So, I just wanted to take that back. And, Chris, if you're listening, you're a great husband. That is really cute.

You always make me feel so confident. That's so cute. and and because you said nice things i'll let you into my vagina land more oh great do you think like once you get married like i don't want chris to see my vagina anymore i never want anyone to see my vagina to be like like when you're having sex do you have sex with lights on or off oh under the covers you mean like that okay or like doggy style yeah i'm not like i don't really want to worship you like your body is a wonderland john mayer no because i'm getting very lazy like with my saying like that's what i'm saying i just started letting him like

see it well not see it but like even get in there when it's not like perfectly yeah coiffed coiffed yeah and it makes me feel funny it makes me feel so uncomfortable so uncomfortable i mean i do it because he doesn't care he really could not care and if they do they're do you want him to like look at it and like prowl on it yeah when you're first dating and like you're first yeah you feel desired and you feel like they like like it's full daylight like the curtains open you're on top of the covers and you're just spread eagle and he's just seeing all of it yeah yeah even if there's a little mucus tucked in there between the majora and the minor it's not mucus but there's always some stuff stuff happening because we're human beings yeah yeah no i don't mind it yeah i sort

of was into that like when you're first with somebody well yeah you just want them to like prounce on you like prounce prounce prounce and pound it's early because it's like yeah it's like very uh i don't know the word for it you don't want them to be like go take a shower let's turn the lights off i don't want to see anything that's going then you're like okay what the is wrong with me i remember when zach and i first started dating he's gonna be thrilled at this story he's gonna kill me um and we were in big sir at like on our first vacation together at the post ranch in which is like heaven on earth and i was like there's like no tvs in the rooms it's a very much like a getaway and i remember just like wanting to

have sex like a bunny rabbit that entire time and we were still like pretty new and he was worried that like if and i found this out later because he like wasn't really trying to like rip my clothes off at every moment like it was like a normal amount of sex but i wanted to have like a lot a lot a lot of sex and i started to be like i think this is the first time i've been with somebody who like doesn't actually want to have sex with me yeah and then i found out later he's like well i didn't want you to like feel like i just wanted to have a ton of sex with you and nothing else so he was like so the girl in that situation oh gentle man but i remember being like why isn't he ripping my clothes off in broad daylight on this balcony like yeah and it was so frustrating and i

really was like well this is why do you not love me i'm becca tobin i'm the most desirable exactly and i was like oh my god i found a man who doesn't who doesn't did it make you not want him more not finding a man who doesn't want to have sex with me there's plenty of those but like yeah is that was a heartbreaker but is that like reverse psychology and it made you want him of course of course he's like the world's greatest salesman so everything that he did to get me to fall in love with him was like the craziest tactics he could teach a course on this he should he should because i'm not kidding you like he infiltrated my life like i don't even know it's like when you're watching late night tv and you wake up the next day and you're like

oh my god i ordered that as seen on tv thing they got to me like that's he's like that pan that's made of diamonds the frying pan i bought it i bought it i didn't think i needed it that's my favorite item he should make no he shouldn't make a crash course for guys he totally didn't play any more games he but his are not games to like do anything other than just make a girl love him like it's crazy there's no like ulterior motive no it's insane did he date a lot before you guys got married he was really funny because he's really and i'm not saying this to like toot my own horn but he he gets turned away turned off like very easily he has very weird like he's super super particular i'm not saying it's like for better or worse but i just didn't fall

under any of the categories that do make him now i do i'm crazy in other ways and i'm sure he's like what the was i thinking but yeah he didn't really have like a lot of girlfriends he dated he went on like a lot of dates and then never called the girls back yeah wow you're so lucky i'm so lucky guys but he was like prowling like he asked my best friend for like eight years straight when i was single for like eight years every day to marry you how long have you known him for i met him when i was probably like 20 21 and yeah he's been trolling me since that's the long con that's the longest con the longest reference yeah the longest your whole life of con this was all about zach martin yeah all about zach and my vagina um okay well this was fun

and um i guess we'll see you guys next time i guess no we're wait are we done yeah this is it yeah she needs to do the sign off yeah do the sign off becca we're not here for a long time but we're here for a good time bye That escalated quickly. Thanks for joining us on Lady Gang Quickie. Check out new episodes of Lady Gang every Tuesday and more quickies every Thursday on PodcastOne.com, the PodcastOne app, and Apple Podcasts.