LadyGang - LG QUICKIE: The Therapy Game

Episode Date: May 27, 2021

As a late birthday gift reveal, Keltie is sharing a game with Becca and Jac that leads everyone to look a little bit deeper and self reflect. Are you a bad person for not stretching? Would you have children faster, if you knew it wouldn’t disappoint your parents? Or are we all just faking it until we make it?  Check out our amazing sponsors!!! Hyundai: Learn about the all-new Tucson at Hyundai.com  Brooklinen: Go to brooklinen.com and use the code "ladies" for $20 off your first order of $100 plus free shipping! Chime: Join the millions on Chime. Apply now at chime.com/LADY  Rothys: Head to Rothys.com/ladygang to find your new favorites today.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Welcome to The Lady Gang. You're about to listen to our podcast, but there is so much more our community has to offer. Follow us at The Lady Gang, join our secret Facebook group, shop our clothing line, books, and find out when we're going to be in your city at theladygang.com. We're so excited you're here. Enjoy the show. This episode of Lady Gang is brought to you by the all-new Hyundai Tucson, the SUV reimagined from the inside out. Learn more at hyundai.com. it's time for a quickie podcast one presents the lady gang the hollywood girl posse with lady gang quickie here's kelty knight becca tobin and jack vanek let's make this quick

hello hello hello welcome to the lady gang quickie i am becca here with jack and kelty hello what are you snacking on kelty just decided this moment to take a gigantic bite of food is it a granola bar pop tart a pop tart wow what kind brown sugar the only kind that matters oh no no no i like the strawberry ones remember back in the day when we would eat during every episode all throughout every episode and all of our bad reviews were about us eating every single one look at us drinking our crispy beverages she's a giant big gulp diet coke it's a double gulp double gulp on the side of this double gulp it says double extra large i bet that's like 64 ounces that's actually how much water you should be drinking a day which i don't think that happens

at all yeah i went for it today but i mean tomorrow's a new day so we'll see what happens you know what i mean yeah totally a new journey every single day i am um i'm so happy to see you both are you I'm a side part I was really hoping that for today's recording session that I would have the new wallpaper up behind me but as you can see I just have the ladder and the swatch because I got this wallpaper and it's not peel and stick it's like the real wallpaper which seems like a disaster so I'm going to put double-sided tape up and then stick the wallpaper to that but the double-sided tape I thought I had in my work area was actually just regular tape. So I'm waiting for my double-sided tape. Hopefully by tomorrow it will be here. That's just not how you put up

wallpaper. Isn't there, I mean, is it like a special double-sided tape or is it? It's like the gorilla glue, you know, they make like where you can hang stuff, but it's like, I don't want to put when if you've ever taken down wallpaper you know that at all costs you want to not have to remove wallpaper wallpaper is the worst paper of and as a paper lover I can tell you your least favorite it's your least fave it's absolutely horrible and I do feel like every year I'll probably put a new wallpaper up so I'm like you know what I'm just gonna it was really cute though because Chelsea was over and I was like I'm sorry we can't do the wallpaper today like she loves a craft like I do. And she's like, oh, okay. And then she was like, well, I don't think like if

we use the tape, we're going to be able to like save the wallpaper when we take it down. I was like, you're so cute. You little non-trash girl. I was like, no, of course, when we take this wallpaper down, it's done, but it will be new wallpaper put up. Anyway, how much can you talk about wallpaper? That's apparently a lot. I'm so excited for today's episode, which I know I always say on a quickie, but it's because I come up with the ideas and someone has to like be happy for me and it's not going to be me and Becca. So for my birthday, my dancer group of friends, we're, we have a really incredible group of friends and we always make each other feel loved. And we definitely have like the love language thing. So when things happen, we all like go on a group

task text and we're like, okay, are we sending Alexis flowers? Let's send Latrice flowers. You know, this year the friends got smart. They know that a flower just dies. And so what they sent me for my birthday. I've had, and I've put it away until now because they knew what a nut bag I am and that this would be the perfect gift for me. So they gave me a gift. It's a little box that you would like get at an urban outfitters or whatever. And it's called the therapy game. Oh, that's fun. So the, the cards, there's all these beautiful cards and they come in, they come in different areas. So I'm not doing work. I'm not doing relationships. We're not doing sex. And I'm going to let you choose between anxiety cards or self cards. And they give you

this little timer. So I'm going to pick a card for you. I'm going to read the question and then you have to talk about it for this amount of time. It's not that long. This is such a nightmare. Wait. So what does that mean? What's the, like, what's the, what's on a self card and what's on an anxiety card. Would you like an example? Yes, please. Okay. Anxiety card. Question one is what do you tend to worry about? Self says, in what ways are you not yet fully mature? AKA none of us are. Ooh. All right. Cool. Let's do it. You can pick either or. Who wants to start? I think Jack seems the most excited about today's episode. I'll do self, I guess. But do it like Jeopardy. kelty what is self no i'll take self for 100 i'll take do i get to choose a price

not really no i'll take self for 69 oh self jack vanek in what ways have you disappointed your parents oh shit none um i can't i mean the only this isn't really a disappointment but the only thing that my mom rags on me for and really wants to happen sooner than it is happening is having a grandchild. So that's the only thing that I feel like she's like trying to be like, move it along. Let's happen. Uh, but other than that, nothing, you know, the only thing you've ever disappointed your parents with. I'm a good kid. I really can't think of anything that I've done. That's been like a terrible thing i guess it's true you didn't do drugs i didn't do drugs i haven't

done anything like horrible i got good grades in high school i were you ever mean to someone and they were disappointed or did you ever get suspended from school no i never got suspended i'm not a mean person guys this is it's too hard i'm sorry you don't have to be a mean person to get suspended i'm also not a mean person and i've been suspended so i never got suspended my mom would fucking murder. That's the thing. Like they put the fear of God in me that I couldn't do any of these things because the disappointment would be so huge. I would just, I wouldn't be able to take it. It makes sense. Becca. I'll do anxiety for 500, please. It is said that we worry about certain things to escape other greater worries. What might these greater worries be for you?

oh let's get back to question and action my greatest worries is everyone dying yeah so like i probably get anxiety about like getting things done making sure all the sheets are clean before people come visit and scheduling uh bikini waxes and it really takes over your day and maybe what you're doing is you're masking the fear that everyone around you will die, including your animal. Isn't that the greatest fear in life? That's my greatest fear. Yeah. Yeah. But it's probably different when it's happened to you. Well, I think I've always had a pretty healthy fear of people dying. Okay. Is that dark? No. Yeah, kind of. It's like I kind of expected. But you know, it's like,

like I have, I have some friends. I had a friend that kind of like, it made me feel weird when they post on their Facebook. This is like the first person that's ever died in my life. And it was their grandparent and they were like a hundred years old. And I was like, that's so crazy to me. Like I had my first friend die when I was in seventh grade. You know what I mean? Like, it's like, it's kind of crazy to like go your whole life and not have to really realize that it's called living a charmed life, but catches up to all of us. It really, it really does. So the team at Hyundai questioned everything to create the best Tucson ever. And you may just know that I'm looking for a new car and we got to drive one of these and it was

the bomb. Every inch of the all new Tucson has been completely re-imagined resulting in an SUV that is loaded with available innovations, both inside and out. There's tons of technology, amazing design tons of safety the suv has been completely redesigned there's a digital key that allows you to use your phone as a spare key boom there's led daytime running lights there's an amazing 10.25 inch full touchscreen infotainment center it was pretty fun when we were in there and had that new car smell and i was like you know what it's time for me to get into suv life i need more room for my projects and this car is so stylish that i'm really into it so please check out more at hyundai.com go check out the new tucson and tell me what you think at hyundai.com

at this point it almost looks like i live in a brooklinen showroom and i am not mad about it every single bedroom bathroom everything is covered with brooklinen and i am so thrilled and guess what summer is here wow how did that happen maybe you want a little refresh for summer maybe you have a lot of house guests coming and you want to impress them with cozy sheets or great towels great news their memorial day sale is happening now brooklinen's offering site-wide savings on all things comfort for this summer and beyond a little more about brooklinen they were founded by a husband and wife duo rich and vicky with the goal to create beautiful luxury home essentials that didn't cost an arm and a leg they work directly with manufacturers to ensure

premium high quality comfort at a fraction of retail price they deliver award-winning comfort direct to your door at the click of a button and let me tell you something it is award-winning so stock up on all things summer comfort and shop the memorial day sale now if you're listening to this podcast after the air date don't worry you can still go to brooklinen.com and use code ladies for twenty dollars off your first order of a hundred dollars plus free shipping that's b-r-o-o-k-l-i-n-e-n.com enter promo code ladies for twenty dollars off your first order of a hundred dollars plus free shipping brooklinen everything you need to live your most comfortable life the lady gang would you like me to take anxiety or self it's your pick dealer's choice

i'm gonna take self oh god how would you like to evolve emotionally as a person how much more do i have to evolve you know we're on an evolution of a lifetime a constant evolution um i think my main thing that i have to continue to evolve and work on is just like looking in the mirror and being like you a bad bitch i'm just kidding um so like a self-confidence no i need to no no no she didn't like our feedback from it so there was a joke joke no no i think for me i need to i'd like to evolve emotionally as a person that i need less outward appreciation. You know what I mean? Validation. That's actually a great one. You know, I think COVID has of course made it like I have to be that person, but I'm not really

that person. It's all a fake it till you make it. Like I can't wait to get out in the world and be on a worst dress list again. Like I can't wait to be on a red carpet and have people be like, Bravo, you know, so, but I need to work on that because it's not cool. Well, the silver lining in this, and maybe you need, just don't have to keep working at it because eventually as women, the older we get, the less validation we get anyways. So it's automatically going to go away. So we're going to have to face it when it comes. So enjoy what you get now. Do you know what I mean? Really try to milk it until like, you're just begging for it. and people are just walking right over you, you know, I had such a funny experience this past

weekend. I was working and, um, I wore our express suit, our white, you looked really cute. Yeah. That was a very adorable outfit. I did a new hairdo and everything. And I, you know, it's been a minute since I did like that kind of event. And so I got all dressed up and I was like, Oh my God, I'm so cute. And then I took a picture and I was like, Oh my God, I'm old. It's so strange to me that like the face looking back, my photo is not like 29 year old. I work on TV Kelty. Like it's so strange to me. You're having a, I think like a, well, is it a quarter or a minute, whatever life crisis about aging? Yes. Cause this has been like a theme of the past couple of weeks is the state of your neck. Yeah. But it's not just neck. It's like my whole, I'm, I'm sexy mature. Like

i'm i'm not like when they had the young guys on and the late like it was like oh you know like she's elder it is upsetting when you get a different energy from a man in their 20s than you're used to getting it's like yes ma'am oh yeah i've gotten a few yes ma'ams lately and it really is a bummer see this is why i'm just holding on to the crop top i'm like you know people are going to think I'm younger than I am. If I'm wearing a crop top, I can really fit in with the teens. Yeah, exactly. Yep. Okay. Jacqueline. Uh, I guess I'll take anxiety this time. Ooh, wait, that's so sad. A sad one, please. Hold on. This is too sad. Well, this is the one I picked up, so I'm going to give it to you. No, it's I I'm not control the therapy game. The

therapy game is the therapy game. What are some sources of sadness in your life? Oh God. oh um i guess the biggest i mean it doesn't everything just come down to death at the end of the day wow this is dark i i guess the biggest source of sadness is like watching the people around you getting older and the people that you care about it's depressing yeah i don't know that's my biggest source of sadness everything else i'm just trying to float by until the end i think there's something that we never talk about um like as human beings is about watching your parents get older. It's such a strange, like you're so close with your parents, Jack. I haven't seen my parents in like over a year. And it's crazy because I used to do this thing

where I'd only see them once a year in my twenties because I wouldn't get home in time. And then every year you're like, whoa, like you see that time pass so much more when they're older. And it's just so crazy to me because everyone, you know, everyone's talking about not seeing their families during COVID, but I'm like, my parents are older and I only have an infinite amount of years left, which I can like count finite. Yes. Right. I have an infinite amount of finite amount of years left. So when you take one of those years out of my like equation, it's starting noticing it. Yeah. I really understand why people are hurting so much about not being able to see their family. Like even like FaceTime and the texts and everything,

like it's not enough. Like you got to see your people. Yeah. And I don't want to waste any time, you know yeah I mean it's just this past year has sucked for so many people in that way because I mean and then you can notice like I'm sure when you see your parents next you'll notice that of how much time has passed since the last time like physically yeah it's weird it's like every time I see my dad he's just a little bit slower like he's my superman you know what I mean it's like get on the ladder build a bridge like whatever you know and like when I see him he gets slower and i'm like god like i'm gonna be i don't have a big family right so like that's it you know same depressing it's a great episode uh self please who would you like to apologize to first

question i have about this card is is this how you spell apologize in the united states no no this is a canadian game this canadian game that's what i thought this is why i think australians also spell apologize like where's this where's this made wait I have a question did your friends make you this game or did they no we bought it oh I thought they created it themselves for you that would have been cute I know they're like we know you're really sad and like to talk about sad things here's a card okay who would I like to apologize to I mean where do I begin um who would I'd like to apologize to you. I wasn't, I was not a mean girl, uh, growing up, but I was definitely, I was mean to people who were mean. And I guess now when I look at kids, I realized that mean

kids are usually a product of just mean parents and that's sad. And usually when a kid is really mean, it means that they're probably have a shitty home life or shitty parents. So all those kids that were mean that I then turned around and was really mean back to, I'm sorry. I didn't just sit you down, look you in the eye and say, who hurt you? You really just exacerbated the problem, you know, instead. Yeah. I'm, but I'm sure I was mean for no reason as like a 13 year old girl. i just i've blacked it out so that sucks because i look at kids and it's really really hard to be like a young girl just in general without any of that so yeah if i ever made a young girl appear is there anything worse than being a teenage girl no it's a junior high aged girls

are the most vicious people in the world it's vicious sane i found all of my notes i'm sure you guys saw when i was posting a shit ton of instagram but i found all of my notes from when i was younger i mean every note was like don't you hate this person we should she's such a bitch like isn't her hair ugly like every single note had some sort of sense of talking shit on somebody or like trying to turn somebody against somebody else like girls are so mean so mean and then the guys are just like want to play video games like why why do we act like that but then it doesn't stop. Like I got a DM today that just said, I hope you burn in hell. Whoa. I think that women are, there's so much pressure that's put on us to look perfect, act perfect, have guys like us do

all the things to get a guy to like us. It's all this shit that we have. We seem to think we're in control of. So when you're out of control of being the hottest, being the coolest, having the most friends, having the cutest outfit. It's like, you can only feel like shit about yourself. And usually when people feel like shit about themselves, they're mean, they take it out on other people. So I remember that like really fueled me as a teenage girl in middle school is it was all jealousy. Yeah. I don't know who the told me that some other girl having a cute outfit didn't mean that my outfit was shitty. Well, like comes down to the whole, like, yeah, there's only room for one of you at the table kind of thing. And like, I don't, yeah. What is

it? Cause it's ingrained no matter who you are and who your parents are, it's somehow ingrained. And it's probably just like, you know, generations of being put down by the man that were like, there's only one that's that can get there. So I'm going to be a bitch and turn everybody else against everybody else. So I can rise to the top. Big Rothy's guy right here. Long time fan of Rothy's. The best selling shoe that has nearly 5,000 perfect reviews is the point in black from Rothy's. It's the perfect work shoe. And the best thing about these shoes, well, I have two pairs. I have the slip-ons in white and I have the slip-ons in leopard print. And they're so cute with like a jean short in the summer, a little dress in the summer. The white ones are perfect

with like a dress. You can wear them to the beach. They're insanely comfortable. They're made sustainably with materials like plastic water bottles. And their best part is they're fully machine washable. That's right. When they get a little stank or they get a little dirty or I wear them somewhere that I wasn't expecting them to get a little bit of mud or, you know, just nastiness, I throw them in the washing machine and then they're brand new. So upgrade your closet with washable, sustainable, stylish shoes and bags from Rothy's. Head to rothys.com slash lady gang to find your new favorites today that is r-o-t-h-y-s.com slash lady gang you know what your bank account should work with you not against you and that's why we love today's

sponsor chime chime is an award-winning app and debit card with no hidden fees or monthly minimums after all you earned your money and you deserve to keep it so they have fee-free overdraft on up to 200 in debit purchases with spot me it's like overdraft protection but better and get your paycheck benefits stimulus check and tax return up to two days earlier with direct deposit there are no hidden fees or monthly minimums plus 38 000 fee-free atms with money pass and visa plus alliance so join the millions on chime sign up takes two minutes and it doesn't affect your credit score apply now at chime.com slash lady that's chime.com slash lady chime is a financial technology company banking services provided by the bank corp bank or stride bank and a member's

fdic eligibility requirements and overdraft limits apply overdraft only applies to debit card purchases limits start at 20 and may be increased up to 200 by chime early direct deposit depends on the payer out of network cash withdrawal fees apply third party and cash deposit fees may apply go to chime.com slash lady for details the lady gang i have such a vivid memory of junior high school this is like my my my story that like I always think about so when I was in like grade eight we loved Blink-182 and everyone cool got like the cool shoe to wear at school which I'm sure is like the Nike or something now was the Adidas like white shell toe with the three stripes yep classic and we like my family didn't have the money for me to get the Adidas shoe and so

i got like the knockoff from zellers which had four stripes it looked it's exactly the same shoe but had like four thin stripes extra stripe and then i was so embarrassed to have the fourth stripe that i thought i could fool everyone so i seam ripped off the fourth stripe so that oh my god three stripes but it was like not the adidas shoe yeah some bitch made fun of you some bitch made fun of me and was like all these things. It was so mean. And then it's like the worst part about it was that I didn't have other shoes. So like when people started noticing that I was wearing the shitty Zellers shell toes and making fun of me, it's not like I could go home and like put a different shoe on. Like I had to wear the shoe all day in shame. It was so awful. And I'm

also like, it just sucks. Like that was so shitty. And it was like, you don't even understand the socioeconomic like version of like what's happening in whatever town of like when your parents are like, Hey, I'm not buying you this $120 shoe. Like, you know what I mean? It was like just insane. Anyway, it was so fucking mean. So don't make fun of people if they can't afford the shoes. Thank you. I think people are doing a better job now of making their kids be kind. except for now the problem is there's social media and people the bullying doesn't stop that's the big i watched a documentary about it it's like you're at least when we were younger and we got bullied or we were bullying or whatever it was you go home and it ends at least for a couple hours

like maybe you're still living it in your mind but now these kids with all the social media and stuff like you're living that 24 7 it never stops like that is insane what do the negative voices in your head focus on when they criticize you anxiety well there's a lot um a voice the negative voices in my head uh focus on uh a lot of body shaming a lot of like why did you eat this not eat this not work out you're a bad person if you can't find time to stretch um a lot of like the things that you didn't do today like i've been meaning to wash callie for three days she hasn't had a bath. Every time I look at her, I'm like, you're a terrible person. You prioritized podcasting over taking care of your animal's fur. Um, that I'm a terrible wife, that I'm a bad

friend, that I'm a bad daughter and a bad sister. And I mean, basically that I'm just like terrible. It's like a, it's a little role, right? It just rolls throughout the day of like, Ooh. And then you're like, don't think about that. And then like in a two hours, like something else comes your way. And you're like, Oh, I'm also like letting people down for this, you know? And I do feel, I have to say like, even with Lady Gang, I feel a lot of pressure to get it right. You know, we're not always going to get it right, but like, I always want to do the right thing and have the right guests and have the episodes be great and have our community love it. So it's like, I also am like, Ooh, we had a new episode come out today. How's the reaction? Do

people like it? Like, do they think it's funny? Like, you know. Question for you circling back to the beginning of this, what are you afraid of if you're not worrying about that stuff? like washing Callie? Go ahead. Like the things to do? Not worrying about the things to do? Like what would you do if you weren't always criticizing yourself for failing at something? Like do you – My ego would be so massive. No, it wouldn't. You're avoiding. Yeah. Yeah. um which is okay but also when you're in that weird spiral of being like you're a piece of shit person for not eating perfectly and not washing your dog then maybe it's like be kinder to yourself and say i can't do everything and guess what the world is still

going to turn if callie goes day four without a bath she doesn't give a shit or like sweating sweating the small stuff about like thinking that you're a terrible friend when you maybe made like a tiny mistake. Like one little action doesn't make you a terrible person. Yeah. I think for me, it's avoiding actual human interaction. I like to spiral in all the things I need to do and the things that I failed at. And then I'm like, well, today's a wash. I'm not going to call this person. Today's a wash. I'm not going to go to this dinner. Today's a wash because I've had a bad day wash. I'm going to take a shower. I'm going to go to bed. I'm going to try to be a good person tomorrow. Like always. Yeah. So dark. Wow. Well, I hope you really enjoyed this

episode of lady gang we probably will never play the therapy game again um thank you to my friends for bringing this right to the top of my list um and uh let us know what you thought let us know if you thought of it and just know that i'll be spiraling if you hated it great well we hope your day picks up because ours might not no no no no we weren't here for a good time like healthy well i was gonna say maybe people that are thinking about going to therapy but are too scared will now know that like these are some of the questions that you get yeah and talk space is there for you it's a sponsor yeah sure is weren't here for a long time brought you down good night thanks for listening the lady gang is produced by alex ingber steve

delameter and jared monaco make sure you subscribe rate and review our podcast and if you love it Share it with your friends on social media like, oh, my God, I just listened to Lady Gang. This episode's so great. Swipe up to listen. And if you really want to, which we know you do, please follow us on social at Kelty, at Becca, at Jack Vanek, and at the Lady Gang. Sign up for our newsletter at theladygang.com and join our secret Facebook group. It's super fun. See you next Tuesday.

This episode of Lady Gang was brought to you by the all-new Hyundai Tucson. The SUV reimagined from the inside out. Learn more at Hyundai.com.