LadyGang - LG QUICKIE: Worst Breakup Ever

Episode Date: March 18, 2021

We’ve all had a bad breakup, including Becca who was once dumped in a bounce house. But, you aren’t alone! The LadyGang community is sharing some of their worst stories like a firefighter who sparked one too many flames and a gal who’s ex still sleeps with her toothbrush. From the very public to the incredibly embarrassing, this is a quickie you’ll definitely be committed to! Check out our amazing sponsors!!! ThirdLove: Go to ThirdLove.com/ladygang to find your perfect-fitting bra and get 20% off your first purchase! Total Wireless: Get an unlimited talk, text and data plan for $25 per month. 1 gig at high speed, then 2G. Terms and conditions at TotalWireless.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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It's time for a quickie. Podcast One presents The Lady Gang. The Hollywood Girl Posse with Lady Gang Quickie. Here's Kelty Knight, Becca Tobin, and Jack Vanek. Let's make this quick. Hello, hello, hello. Welcome to the Lady Gang Quickie. I am Becca here with Jack and Kelty. I'm really excited about this episode because this is a Lady Gang community-sourced episode. I love a community-sourced episode.

And it's so good. So I'll just kind of explain and then we can get into it. But the Quickie is brought to you by Third Love, which we love because your boobs deserve better. We've all been there. Our straps follow throughout the day. You glance at your reflection and you see the cups are too small. They're tubbing, tugging at your back. Um, your boobs deserve better. You don't have to have a bad bra. It's time to break up with your bad bra and fall in love with a better bra and underwear from third love. Third love has a virtual fitting room. Um, and they can help you focus on size, shape, fit issues. And, um, so our quickie today is filled with some of our communities, worst breakup stories, because when you know, your bra is bad and you keep wearing it

and then put it in your drawer and then keep the next time you wear it, you're like, ah, I should have gotten rid of this. This is what happens with bad boyfriends and stuff. And so we're just like committing to having a moment of breakup with your bad bra, go get a new comfy one from third love. And then also breakups in general. All right. So do you get the theme, how I put that together. I love it. I do too. It's very good. I love a breakup. It's my favorite topic. Before we get into it, I want to tell you that our listeners right now get 20% off your first order. Just go to thirdlove.com slash lady gang now to find your perfect fitting bra and get 20% off using thirdlove.com slash lady gang. Okay. So what we're doing is that we asked our

lady and community in Facebook to send us their worst breakup stories. And I have gone through them and I picked our top 20. And then we're going to read through them. We're going to talk about them, whatever. And then on Instagram today, we're going to post the top five. We're going to have the community vote via emoji. This is so intense. I love it on the top breakup. And then the winner, we have code names for everyone, but the winner of the worst, best, the best, worst breakup is going to win a gift certificate to third love. So they can go outfit themselves with bras and stuff. So how did you come up with this whole idea yourself? Yes. This is pretty genius. Thank you. It's like the best worst breakup. Okay. So are you guys ready? I'm going

to read them. And then I just want you to talk through questions, feelings, thoughts, you know, we'll add some color, add some cool air, darling. Okay. Number one, I broke up with my boyfriend of two years after he became obsessed with video games and overall disinterested with me. Finally, one day i got the courage to sit him down to tell him how i really felt we'd been living together for five months and it really wasn't working out i poured my heart out and i put it all out there his response okay but can i keep the tv stand no oh you know as somebody that is dating somebody that also loves video games these men love their video games i mean it might be it might turn sometimes i'm like jared do you care about anything but the video game like they love them

they will do anything to preserve them when jared goes to phoenix he takes his entire computer with him so he can play his video games in phoenix oh my god so i can see this happening how many hours a day is this happening with jared well it's covet i guess it doesn't count he only he usually only plays after I go to bed. It's been, it's, he has this like secret addiction, secret, my secret addiction. Honestly, after you've been married for five years, you're going to be like, please go play your video games for days and days and days. I don't care. Well, it's, I watch hours and hours and hours of really, really bad reality TV. So it really, it's just, how do you decompress, you know? Exactly. And I love any reason to watch reality TV without him, but this poor girl,

I mean, this is, oh, okay. It gets worse. Listen to this one. I'm going to read them like in dramatic flair. Okay. I love it. I love it. Okay.

My fiance had three other girlfriends who were pregnant. He had a completely different personality, wardrobe style with each of us. He told me that he was a firefighter. So I understood the schedule and he would even get selfies of him like in the gear. He was exposed because someone saw our engagement photos on a local photographer's Facebook page and then everything started to unravel. He tried to tell the other women that he was doing some side modeling jobs and that I was just a model he was working with. I mean, I do work as a plus size model, but I'm not the engagement photos. The worst part is that his parents knew and said nothing.

They were going to let me marry this piece of. I remember I got full on body hives when I found out and I couldn't stop throwing up. I was so upset and then terrified. I was pregnant. Thankfully, I wasn't. But he did leave me with an STD. Whoa, this is straight out of a movie. This is a rom-com hallmark.

This woman needs to make this into a TV show. it's like dirty john but yes worse but with with with love i mean total psychopath do we trust a firefighter i mean they do go like i'm five days on five days off like he's not a firefighter he's a con man yes he's a con man the different personality thing really interests me i'm not gonna lie i'm not gonna lie i think it would be so fun for about a week to jump into different personalities and style myself accordingly and be with three different people. Yeah. I mean, it does sound fun. It's like one day Chris comes home and he's like a jock. And the next day he's like full three-piece suit. And the next day he's a sommelier.

I would do. Being a goth would be fun. Yeah. Yeah. I think it would be very enjoyable. One of mine would definitely be someone who didn't shave her armpits or legs. that sounds liberating. Okay. Next. Okay. I love this one. Very good. Okay. Number three, my boyfriend couldn't get the words out that he wanted to break up with me. So I basically dumped myself for him. Well, good for you because some people get very blatantly dumped and still don't know they've been dumped. It's true. It happened with me. It did with me. Yeah. But I was the dumper and i dumped my ex-boyfriend and then he uh and i did not accept it straight up dumped him dropped him off at his house we were over and then he showed up at my apartment the

next morning crying not not understanding that he really got dumped then i shoot him away again and then he kept like contacting me like we're gonna still get together and i had to write like an email and I like really broke up with him for the third time via the email she's like please receive this notarized letter telling you I no longer want to be with you I know I needed like a witness there's actually a famous Hollywood story about a pretty big celebrity that was such a pain in the ass that she was getting fired like let go from her publicist which is a really hard thing to do because you're paying a publicist like six grand a month paying them to be your friend and get you famous. So she was such a pain in the ass that they couldn't even take her money.

They had to just let her go. And they tried to break up with her in the room and they were on a conference call and she's like, okay, cool. They're like, you know, this isn't working out and blah, blah, blah. And she's like, okay, cool. So what's happening with next month? Are we going to do this launch? And they kept being like, no, Sarah, code name, we are telling you that we're not moving forward. We're not going to be working together anymore. And she's like, okay, well, that's cool. So are you going to send somebody a point person to this thing next week for me? And they're like, this is not happening. And then a week later she called as if nothing had happened and they had to get every single person on her team involved to break it down for her that she

was getting dumped. I'm like, this is a clear, this is somebody who's never been dumped or let go from anything. So she does not, she doesn't get it. This is literally an episode of Seinfeld when George, uh, George's girlfriend kept trying to break up with him and he just wouldn't answer his phone so it couldn't happen not accepting it yeah i'm i love it i really love that theory i mean the that uh do you think the the denial the mindset i'm into it i know i'm gonna do it with pilot season i think i'm just gonna show up on the first day of of shooting a pilot in april like they all shoot in la in april i'm just gonna show up to one you should because some people can i get a coffee over here please some people might not know how to say no you could con your way into

a job you really could i mean i feel bad for this girl but it's not not terrible no not okay we'll see what you think of this long story short my fiance told me he was going to be a dad i wasn't pregnant this exact thing happened in the newest season of married at first sight and it is oh a doozy that sucks that sucks so far my front runner is the fireman yeah same okay now next one i had two this is a little long so i'm going to put on my acting voice i had two breakups and under no i don't like that voice i had two breakups in under a minute it's a little long but i promise it's worth the read and this is good it was my first serious boyfriend at this point, we had been together about four years. I was a teenager at the time, and my best friend

was being a wing woman by convincing me to tell my parents that I was staying over at her house so I could actually go stay the night at my boyfriend's. All is going according to plan. I fell asleep in my boyfriend's arms that night, and my parents didn't have a clue. I wake up in the morning to a million texts and missed calls from both my parents. They know where I am, and they are pissed. I had no idea how my mom knew, but she was always able to find out when I was being a troublemaker. I rush home. I'm immediately grounded right at the start of spring break.

I can't go to my boyfriend's house or my best friend's house at all. The day before spring break ends, I get my phone back and try contacting my boyfriend, but I am unable to. I try to text my best friend as well, but get no answer. Both of their profiles say active 10 minutes ago. The next day, my best friend shows up to school with a large hickey on her neck. A mutual friend runs up to us and says, are you going to tell Anna about what happened with her boyfriend?

She shoots the mutual friend a glare of death, but it's too late to cover this up. I could already sense in my gut what happened. Basically, the entire thing was a setup. Then my best friend contacts my mom, tells her where I am because she's concerned. She knew I'd get grounded over spring break. Then she and my boyfriend have the entire two weeks to spend together without me interrupting. I lost my best friend of over 15 years and my first serious boyfriend all in one day flash forward to the present now we're all adults and they have a child and live together no matter how

much time passes I'm still able to channel that feeling of hurt and betrayal oh my god no shit I mean I'm glad it was worth it for her to for her friend to lose her best friend because she's still at least with the guy you know not a bad point Jack it was because usually that happens and then you ruin a friendship and then that guy is an asshole to you too and then that fizzles in like two weeks so at least somebody got something good out of it even though it's it wasn't our sweet lady ganger it's true all right this is the best worst breakup competition when we come back more from our third love deal remember you can get 20 off at thirdlove.com slash lady gang we love third love over here at the lady gang i pretty much replaced all of my bras with third love bras

because they are so comfy and they actually fit me and you know why because they have over 80 sizes every third love bra is made with signature memory foam cups no slip straps and a scratch free band and they have cups from double a through i including half cups in bands 30 through 48 and you've heard us talk about their fit finder quiz before but third love just launched the fitting room a new and improved version of the quiz that we all know and love it's like a personal shopper for your boobs which i freaking love the quiz focuses on size brush shape current fit issues and your personal style so they deliver bras and underwear that are absolutely perfect for you and third love stands behind their products if you don't love it exchanges and returns are free

and it's time to let go of your bad bra your boobs deserve better break up with your bra and fall in love with a better bra and underwear so third love knows that your one true fit is out there so right now they're offering our listeners 20 off your first order go to thirdlove.com slash lady gang to find your perfect fitting bra and get 20 off your first purchase that's thirdlove.com slash lady gang for 20 off today do amazing with total wireless because when you move to total wireless you can get an unlimited plan with incredible devices now with nationwide 5g available in 2700 plus cities capable device and sim required get our best deal ever with an unlimited talk text and data plan for 25 per month per line for four lines with 100 gigs of shared

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line or devices activated any lines or devices activated later in the first 30-day cycle will receive only the number of days remaining in that cycle savings claim excludes taxes fees auto pay discounts and limited time pricing source competitor websites 10 2020 hey black Girls Texting has entered the chat. We are Black Girls Texting with Chelsea, Glenn, and Sade. Each Wednesday, we drop new episodes where we talk about dating, career, colorism, and whatever else is popping off in our group chat. Sometimes we even talk with some of your favorite celebs like Janelle Monae, Amanda Seals, Rachel Lindsay, Lena Waithe, and so many more. You can find us anywhere you get your podcasts every Wednesday. Hope you join the group chat soon with Black

girls texting the lady gang all right we're back okay um next he left me for the nanny that's it that's the tea oh damn woof this is a cute one I know I don't think this will be a finalist but I just wanted to like say it my ex-boyfriend dumped me and I said and said I wasn't going anywhere in life now I make more money than him and he lives with his mom boy bye zing that's all of them no no there's more okay there's so many we got like hundreds and hundreds things okay he sent me an email saying i was a really good speller but it just wasn't going to work we were seniors in college yes spelling did they have like an inside joke that she's a great

speller i have no idea i i care about spelling and grammar so that would you dump someone over their spelling if it was atrocious enough no he didn't dump her over her spelling her spelling he said she was a great speller but it wasn't gonna work out despite the good smelling yeah despite which is you are which is a great quality to have as a person right you know i think i think your spelling is great but i'm just not interested just not that into you okay next i would have preferred like you've got a sweet ass but i still have to break up with you right i got texted by my then boyfriend that he was no longer interested in a romantic relationship he was sitting three feet from me oh my god amazing i love this one i'm into this one i mean it's not i'm not into

it for her sake, but it is pretty savage. I got to know where they were. Were they at a bar? Were they sitting on the couch? Were there other people around? Were they alone? Were they in their house that they lived in together? I need more information. Or in the car. That's even better. Gross. Okay. This one is really good. My boyfriend of three years, talking engagement. We'd been going through a rough patch, took a couple of days apart to really think about what we wanted. i go to his house to talk we have sex and then he dumps me while i'm naked in his bed two days and that's like horrible right just get this two days later pics of him and the girl he had been cheating on me with kissing in front of the castle upload to my disney app apparently he forgot that

we had a shared account. I know that Disney app is so good. How does the app work? Okay. It works like this. You register your wristband because you're in the park. And then when you go around and you take pictures with like the professional, you know, with Mickey or whatever, you then to track down your pictures it all uploads to the app so so you don't go to the kiosk and like buy them one at a time anymore no it all kind of you go down whatever that water ride is they take your photo it's very convenient but whoa but so then that so they have the joint account and then it uploaded on hers yeah i would have you know what she should do she should get a huge huge print of made canvas yes huge canvas and drop it off and say here's to your new life together

that girl probably wants that gift great pick great pick but then they'll be like whoa this is so weird how did she get this is she stalking us does she have a private investigator no it's the disney app bitches the happiest place on earth for everyone but me i want to know how many relationships disney's ruined you know like these are interesting this could be a good podcast of because you know it is the happiest place on earth but what what should we do a podcast the unhappiest things that happened at the happiest place on earth unhappiest place on earth i think that's a genius idea for a podcast should we just have a another series called the unhappiest place on earth just goes on lady gang every wednesday and you're just like you know in case we were

too happy for you here's some bad stuff I'll obviously be running that show here's how my life crumbled when I was at Disneyland okay uh all right we have just a couple more the day after I broke up with him he posted a status on Facebook admitting to sleeping with my toothbrush on his pillow because it was the one thing I left behind oh I don't think anybody should date anyone who does status updates on Facebook. Okay. And even I'll take that one step further. People that do status updates on Facebook that like talk in the third person. Oh, like Becca Tobin is so tired today. I do that. No, you don't. I do it in the Facebook group sometimes. Well, no, you do. You do do that you're right i'm sad i'm sad no but i'm talking about sad you'll say kelty night is

sad i'm talking about especially when facebook started people would do that where the away message is is feeling tired annoyed yeah i did that i definitely did that oh god i don't like a third person talk anyways we only have a couple more um boyfriend of five years went out with buddies instead of dinner with me. When I showed up to his house, he wasn't there. So I called him a little peeped since those were the plans. He answered and I could hear all of his bros in the background hooting and calling me names while I was trying to figure out what happened. So I got annoyed and hung up. He called back and said, I just wanted to make sure you heard me. My friends and I decided that you should shut the up and never talk to me again. And he hung up and we

never spoke again. Oh my God. I mean, I don't want to say that this is very parallel to my bounce house experience which Sean McVay did to me but it is except for cussing me out his friend said Becca Sean doesn't want to go out with you anymore so I love this my friends and I decided amazing that's like my friend that's such a good guy thing my friends and I decided to make sure you heard yeah it reminds me of when Danny dumped me in eighth grade and like he was my boyfriend for three months in your broken arm the whole time which is like not that fun in winter like you can't do that many activities with the boyfriend of the broken arm and she walked by and she was like did you do it yet i was like we were all breaking up remember yeah so mean

god people are mean i know this sounds like something that would have happened in junior high but it sounds like it happened as an adult for this well then devil's advocate is she terrible that's always your devil's advocate in situations like this it is or did he try to break up with her multiple times and she didn't hear the message sounds like something i should have done in my breakup she's like she's standing outside on the porch and he's like yo i broke up with you a week ago i don't know i don't know we're sorry that you're that happened but good riddance to any okay i have one more and then i have a true crime one for jack okay this is the last nice one my husband broke up with me over facebook messenger because i stayed up on new year's eve with my

parents watching impractical jokers he began the message with i don't know what demon climbed inside of you but i don't like it he then switched his relationship status on valentine's day to it's complicated and messaged me out of the blue and tried to force me to change mine to the same even though we haven't talked except to separate separate our possessions i of course said no and less than two weeks later he was in another relationship oh wait breaking i don't know what kind of demon climbed inside of you but i don't like it i'm stealing that for sure because she was watching impractical jokers with her parents this is amazing because you probably want to have sex with her he sounds unstable yeah he there's he's yeah also calling someone to change their

status on facebook another reason to not use facebook everyone but also not even to say that you're single to it's complicated it's complicated yeah that's bizarre okay last one now this one i'm putting like a tiny trigger warning on it because it has to do with drugs um but it's so jack vanek that i do feel like there is another true crime podcast based on this so i wanted to include it but i'm just letting everyone know that i know it's inappropriate okay here we go my ex-fiance started getting suspicious packages in the mail and was talking to people on encrypted messaging apps i kept asking who he was talking to on the apps and what the packages were and he just got annoyed at me for asking one day i came home from work

And he told me someone broke into our apartment, but there was no sign of a break-in. This went on for days where he thought I hired people to break in to scare him. He was so paranoid. I had never seen him act like this. He started to accuse me over and over and it scared me. So I had to call the police and they took him to the hospital. At the hospital, he admitted having been on bath salts. it turned out he was using our wedding money that his parents gave him to buy drugs from these weird

online internet drug dealers which explained the weird packages and the secret convos on the apps obviously i left him immediately and canceled our wedding plans because it was so traumatic and a complete betrayal of trust he then blamed the breakup on me because he couldn't trust me again because i called the cops on him when he went insane and told his family about it to try to get him help i'm honestly just glad he didn't eat me like in other bath salt stories oh my god you know it took me years to realize it wasn't actually bath salts it's not no no it's a drug that's like the street name for oh so it like looks like those bath salts that you put in your bath i imagine that's where the name came from i've never seen one up close and personal either

anyway i just like that the end was like i'm glad he just didn't eat me that is i mean that is imagine living that that is crazy where he's sending encrypted messages and then strange packages show up at your house that could mean so many scarier things than that real talk how many girls out there would rather have that happen than find out a man's cheating probably a lot a lot because it's not your fault then then and it also doesn't hurt your ego like exactly like i can't compete with bath salts or whatever i don't know what they do or i can't be a synthetic drug yes i can be a lot of things baby um well listen i think this was fun and i think i loved this episode we need more episodes like this we need to do this again and i want to

thank the lady gang community on facebook because we did have like i think oh hundreds of answers and these were just the ones that like were appropriate enough to put on a podcast um but i think this is so cool and i think we should do more of this because it makes me feel a lot less alone when i realize that everyone's had these like horrible experiences this is amazing and we want to thank third love for sponsoring this episode third love try the virtual fitting room i know that you know we all love our third love bras um third love knows the right one right true fit for love and for your bras out there so right now they're offering our listeners 20% off your first order go to thirdlove.com slash lady gang to find your perfect fitting bra and

get 20% off that's thirdlove.com slash lady gang thanks for coming to this quickie thanks for supporting our podcast and thanks for supporting our boobies we love you for love we sure do and we weren't here for a long time but we are here for a good time pretty scary time thanks for listening the lady gang is produced by alex ingbert will sterling steve delameter and jared monaco make sure you subscribe rate and review our podcast and if you love it share it with your friends on social media like oh my god i just listened lady gang this episode's a great swipe bub to listen and if you really want to which we know you do please follow us on social at kelty at becca at jack vanek and at the lady gang sign up for our newsletter at the lady gang.com and

join our secret facebook group it's super fun see you next tuesday