LadyGang - Old Money Face, Off Campus Obsession & A Hole in Keltie's Skull

Episode Date: June 9, 2026

Keltie is dealing with the fallout from her Glamour article about illegal GLP-1s and her facelift (the comments are wild), Becca discovered "old money face" is the new flex (no Botox, no fillers, just generational wealth and gray hair), and Jac is fully obsessed with the hockey romance show Off Campus and the dreamy Belmont Cameli. We also get into the Sharon Stone of it all (keeping fat on your body is the real anti-aging secret), Becca's spider-in-the-bed nightmare that's pushing her to buy a mesh bed tent, Jac's actual nightmare about missing the podcast to be set up with Rob Rausch, Keltie's massive closet clean-out and her new favorite invite-only designer rental app Louvel, and the dental horror story that ends with Keltie staring at a literal hole in her skull on a CT scan. We have deals for YOU!!Nutrafol: Got thinning hair? Get $10 off your first month’s subscription AND free shipping at Nutrafol.com and use code LGPODFodzyme: Enjoy your favorite foods without the pain! Get 30% off your first order at ICanEatAgain.com/ladygangBoll & Branch: Sleep cooler this summer! Get 20% off at bollandbranch.com/ladygang with code "ladygang"Progressive: Looking to save on car insurance? Cruise on over to Progressive.comMacy's: Refresh your wardrobe! Remember to shop at Macys.com OR in-store!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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well what is this welcome to the lady gang that's amazing say that again the lady gang things are about to change around here each week we catch up with hollywood's hottest girl posse kelty knight becca tobin and jack vanik hello hello hello welcome to lady gang i'm becca tobin here with jack vanik and kelty knight hello hello everyone how's it going it's going great I'm dealing with the onslaught of positive and negative comments on an article I wrote for Glamour today. I didn't write it. I did it with Jessica Radloff.

It just came out this morning. And it talks all about how when I did illegal, this is in the book, I did some illegal GLP-1s because I looked around and everyone was thin. Illegal? Well, not illegal, but like I didn't need them and I lied to get them. Right, right. Sketchy doctor. Sketchy doctor and my facelift.

And it's just so crazy. And the feedback, because I'm so proud of it. I've been kind of terrified of it coming out, but it's in the book. So like this stuff is going to come out anyway. But also like the wildness of basically what I'm trying to say in this book is that like, I just don't know that there's an answer. And I know the answer isn't perfection. but I also know the answer is like people who do this stuff they are up and like just shaming them about doing it isn't there's such deep work to be done and so this woman like wrote on the comments and she goes I think this article really missed the mark it should be about learning to love yourself I was like thank you so much Gladys like I know you know what I mean like you're like that's the point of the article is that's the problem the problem is you're not saying that you yeah you never say you have all the answers you're just being really honest about everything the pressure of it all and what can lead someone who seemingly has a perfect life to still choose the

path of self-destruction like so for her to be like you should just learn to like yourself I've been trying bitch I've been trying like we've been trying it's a lifelong goal of mine You know what I mean? It's a lifelong goal. I was excited to talk about how much I still hate myself. I was so happy to like spend $100,000 plus on a facelift and then wake up in the morning and be like, is this facelift sagging again? Like, I really love that. Like it doesn't fix anything, but it fixes, I don't know. Anyway, there's so much nuance to that. But anyway, just in the middle of that. Actually, this will probably be, this will tie into my good week and it's a good segue. So it's time for good week. Yes, it is bad week. Oh no. So you guys, we can

stop trying so hard and we can stop doing all the things because you know how stealth wealth was a thing with fashion. Yes. Now there's old money face and there's old money, everything. So I actually did observe this, but didn't know what to call it. When I was down in this place called Boca Grande. Boca Grande sounds where I need to go. That does sound like old money. Take me to Boca Grande. It's like the bushes have a beach house there, right? Okay. And it is just waspy, like generations upon generations. There's no founders there. There's no girl bosses there. There's nothing, nothing, nothing modern, right? There's also not really a sprinkle of Botox to be seen. There's a lot of gray hair on 40-year-old women. There's a lot of unpolished nails. There's

a lot of things that you would not necessarily put together with extreme wealth, but then it's like they've surpassed the point of needing to prove that they have money by putting it on their face. They have now just been to the point where they have so much money that they can just look normal. Well, if you have so much money, you don't give a like. Right. Right. But it's also kind of a flex. So it is a flex. It's a flex for them. I don't need to use my sexuality or prettiness to get anything because I already have. I have it all. Everything. There's my dad invented hangers. Yeah. Yeah. There's this guy that made the little zippers that says like YZZ on it. how rich they are.

Motherfucker. Why didn't I invent a zipper? Okay, anyways, there's this Netflix show. It's, like, about, like, the Mar-a-Lago women. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, anyways, so everybody...

Is it Parma Royale? Is that what it's called? I forget what the name of it. No, no, no, it's a reality show. Oh, it's the reality show. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And it's all of the women

down in Mar-a-Lago, and they all have, like, all this work done except for one. And she's the richest one, and she's never had any work done, and it's almost, like, shocking to see her

in contrast with everybody else. Cause everybody has like the worst veneers I've ever had. Like the chiclet, like bright, bright white. And like, everybody has the same nose job. Everybody has the same makeup. And then she's just very natural looking with no hair extensions, kind of thin hair, sort of short. And I'm like, now you look so chic compared to all of these like plastic 65 year old Barbie women. Like it's very, I totally get it. Cause I noticed that while watching that show. Yeah. I haven't had Botox in almost a year and it wasn't on purpose. I'm lazy. But now I'm just going to keep it going. So people think I'm rich. I will say that. I'm so rich that I don't have to get Botox. There was something about our friend Sharon Stone at

Cannes because, you know, we were talking about this a few weeks ago and I wanted to talk about it more but I you know obviously can it was jarring a lot of the bodies and all of this and we're just in this skinny funnel right now and it is aging our women you know it ages you like the woman um that we had on last week um Ayla about aging your ovary aging right like it's like she basically said the secret to anti-aging is keeping some fat on your body is what I heard um and I saw Sharon Stone and like I was just like she's so radiant like do you know what I mean and she's she has beautiful body and she's tall but she's thin like she's a beautiful shape I wouldn't say she's like Hollywood skinny you know what I mean she's not doing it doesn't appear to be that she's

doing the magic shot no she's no but she's like glowing and she's she's got wrinkles and like I just think she's so cool and like yes of course she's wearing these beautiful gowns and has the best makeup artists and stuff. But like, I was just like, wow, you, you look so beautiful. And why is everyone talking about how beautiful you look? There are supermodels over here and there are, you know, other people over here, but there's just something about that radiance. So I'm, I'm holding that into my brain. Yeah. When my black swan brain comes out. But yeah. Yeah. Okay. Well, that was my good week. So now I'm in, I'm accidentally just rich face. Okay. rich face with rich nails um okay then my bad week is this is devastating and i'm so sick and

tired i don't know what this means oh no i was sleeping in my bed and i feel something crawl across my face and i turn zach's out of town i turn the light on quickly i like pull my covers back it was a spider it was a it was a fucking spider i had a spider in my ear a couple years ago, if you will remember. Yeah. So where was the spider? I had a roach crawl across my hand at a lake house last summer. The spider, well, it crawled down my face and I kind of like brushed it away. And then you saw it on the blanket. And then I saw it on the bed. And I am, I know that this is just a reality of being a human living in the world, but I'm so sick of having critters in my bed. I'm thinking of buying when this thing happened to me with the roach a couple of years

ago, some of the lady gangers, hilarious lady gangers sent me this thing you can buy on Amazon where you it's like a mesh tent that you put over your bed. But it's it's almost like a sleeping bag. It's like a tanning bed. But it's all mesh. And I'm not kidding you. I'm I'm going back to the same lake for the 4th of July. And I know that it's a clean house. It's just they just things are just there. They live in the forest. Roaches. The roach is worse than the spider. We love spiders. Ten times worse. Yeah. The roaches are very, it's a very Georgia thing and very like Southern. Like I don't feel like. How do you catch a roach? I feel like you can easily catch a spider. Oh, they're so fast and disgusting. I have a little body bag that I take

on vacations because Chris always likes to go to a hut and it's like green and you zip yourself. I'm like so sexual for our vacation. You zip yourself in and I just leave my eyes, nose and mouth out this much. And so no creepy craw. I'll send you the link. No creepy craw. There has to be something you can put a mesh on your face or something. No, it's I got it. I want to find this. I'll find it and I'll show you. But anyway, there's lots of options. Like if you're going to a cabin and you feel creepy crawly, I like to have my own little bag, my own safe bag. There was so like six months after Jared and I started dating, we went to Costa Rica and we stayed in this house that instead of like like screen windows they had like slats like it was

like wooden slats that you would open up your and I cannot tell you how many big ass bugs were in this house and Jared and they don't care and Jared I learned on that trip is scared of bugs so I had to be the one that was like getting the shoe and smacking all of these bugs but it was crazy. It was like big ass spiders, big roaches, big beetles. And I'm like, how does this house not have screens? And like, you know, it was one of those older houses where like the bottom of the door was like this. There's this much space to nothing more disgusting. I know it's why I can't go to very tropical places. And I know that sounds bad, but this is what I'm going to get for my trip. Oh, my God. It's a literal tent that goes over your bed. And it's hot pink. So this is

I don't, I honestly don't blame you. Okay, I'll go next. So my good week is I have a new obsession. My obsession is a TV show called Off Campus. I told you. Have you watched it? Yeah, of course. I haven't.

Oh my God. I'm the one who told everyone Belmont, Calamali, or whatever you say is the new- She's the hottest man I've ever seen in my life. You're welcome. Oh my God. Okay, so if anybody that doesn't know, I have posted about it quite sometimes

because I can't stop thinking about it. It's, what is it? Well, it's based off of a book that I think is a little bit smutty. Yeah, it's like a hockey smut romance. It's a hockey, it's a heated rivalry for straights. Yeah, and like they're in college. And the reason why I love this show so much

is there's like no toxicity in it. Like all of the male characters are like definitely written by a woman. Like it's exactly how you would want a guy to be and treat you. And it's funny because like I was obsessed with Tell Me Lies, which is like the absolute opposite. Like there's nothing more f***ed up than Tell Me Lies, but I'm also obsessed with this show. It is so good. It makes you so giddy. You're like living vicariously through the characters. And I'm like, am I in college falling in love with a hockey player? And the music,

the like soundtrack is great. Like it's just sexy. But does it make you sad to not be that young? yes a little bit oh yes like I want I want to feel like that like it's that like feeling of like you're walking across the meadow and you're like just waiting for the night to start because you know like yes and like when like they finally like say I love you like it's it's so cute and to your point earlier um the main character the girl her name is Ella something or other but she has like a normal body and it's so refreshing to see a normal body on a woman being very like she's just so beautiful and I feel like in so many of these shows like we are getting like the stick thing girls and it's like she's just a very beautiful normal girl and I just think everything

about the show is perfect and they're doing a season two and all it's I'm just very excited Ella Bright is her name she's so cute she's beautiful and she's so young she's only like 19 or something jeez louise all the guys 19 i like all the guys the blonde guy obsessed with the the the the guy that like i follow belmont on instagram that's how much i love him i think i might need to start following him too he's cute and he's not an over poster it's very editorial you're gonna love it people are also like comparing the show because it's very nostalgic like they're comparing it to like 10 things i hate about you and she's all that and 16 candles like a little friday night light see yeah and they're like he's kind of has that like

Keith Ledger vibe in 10 Things I Hate About You. Anyways, it's so good. I highly recommend. So my bad week is, I never really talk about my dreams because I hate when people talk about their dreams, but I did have a nightmare the other day. And my nightmare was I could not make it to record Lady Gang. And I have these, that's not the nightmare. I have these nightmares. Every one of my nightmares, I've probably talked about it before. Every dream I have is I cannot get to somewhere. Like my dream is not being able to get there. I'm trying so hard and it's always so stupid, but like I physically just can't make it. So that was this dream. And in the dream, our guest was Rob Rausch from Love Island and the Traitors. And also in my dream, I was single

and part of him coming on the lady gang was like trying to hook me up with him. So I missed being able to be hooked up with Rob and I woke up devastated so that was my nightmare because that was a nightmare imagine if that happened in real life I would be it would be the worst day of my life god Rob you would let Rob like and I would too I think Becca might even like I know we can't no I can't be in the room with him I would let him I would let him ruin my life no it just is that guy that you're just like I I would just when you grow up in the south that's guys a dime a dozen oh you guys are just I mean those guys are a dime a dozen I just love it's it's like you're toxic like when I was younger that's just like it's you can fix him and he'll change for me and

he's so mysterious but I'll break him you know yeah I'll get in there all right my good week is that I did a spring cleaning for the masses I on my alta I had 600 plus items and I was with Jenny, the creative Alta, which is this fashion app that is a closet app. And I said, how many items do you have? And she's like, I'm she's so Gen Z. I'm very intentional in how I shop. Like sometimes I'll yell at her because I'm like, you can't wear your black blazer on Good Morning America. Like, don't you have something pink? She's like, no. Like I was like, right. I would never go on Good Morning America without buying a new outfit. But she's so Gen Z. They're so thoughtful. Anyway, she was like, I have like 300 items. And I was like, oh, I have too many items.

so I went through, there's like this feature where you can see like the things that you've worn the least. And there were things I'd never worn. And I was like, okay, so I did the biggest closet clean out and I put it all up on my secret Poshmark and it is selling like hotcakes, girl. I'll link my secret Poshmark in the newsletter this week, but I don't want everyone, everyone else to know it exists. Um, but Poshmark has come a long way. This is not an ad, but they have a new AI feature where you literally take an ugly picture of it and it uploads it and says what it is. It's so easy. Anyway, I feel so much better just having only things that I love. I went through, I tried on every pair of jeans I own and just was like,

if I don't feel great the minute this zips or if this doesn't fit me anymore, it's going. I tried on every bathing suit I own. And I was like, I'm never going to pick this bathing suit when I have these other three that I love. I tried on every gown, every party dress, every skirt. And I was Like, it was amazing. Okay, here's my bad week. It's a good feeling. Actually, I'm going to do that. Putting on the jeans and if you don't zip them up and feel immediately amazing, they go.

Because that's where I struggle. That was such a good thing to say. That was such a good thing to say because I also just did a closet clean out and I think I kept too many things because I was like, maybe. Like, I bought when I was super thin, I bought a pair of Chloe jeans that were so expensive and I cannot zip them up anymore. And I never want to be in a place where I know what it takes to be that thin. I never want to be in a place again. So I'm not even holding on to them to be like, oh, when I'm that size again, I'm never going to be that size again.

I'm okay with that. They get sold. And then I put certain things I put on RealReal because they're like worth more. And then I also signed up for this really cool app. Sorry. I just want everyone to know about everything. It's called Luvel. Have you heard of it?

No. Okay. So it's invite only. I'll get more info for Lady Gang, but it's invite only. I actually applied like six months ago and I just got accepted and it's where all the girly pops, they rent their clothes to each other and it's all designer. So it's like this girl has like all these really cool items and they're all designer. And then they, it's like a rent the runway with like all your fancy friends closets. That's fun. Actual good shit. Like really good

stuff. Like they wouldn't even take my area. They wouldn't like, it's all Valentino, Chloe, St. Laurent like it's really good so smart that's so smart actually yeah and there's like a lot of like gowns and stuff so I'm like oh when I'm going to something fancy instead of buying I can just rent and the rentals are like 350 for the week instead of where at Albright or showrooms in LA it can be like up to 1500 you know they have snowsuits so if you're like going on a sexy snow thing and you're like just still have stress when I spend like even sometimes with rent the runway when I like look I'm like but for $200 to rent it I could have I need to change my mindset because then I'm like but I could put $200 towards something that I would actually keep but then

you never wear the thing again so it's like and if you rent something you can go with something that you like feel really good in and that's really nice do you know what I'm saying like if it's $350 to rent the thing but I need to change my mindset I think I know myself well enough. I feel that Becca. And I tried to be that girl. I was like, I'm just going to invest in a closet I love. And so I went to a wedding and I bought a Victoria Beckham dress to wear that was so fabulous. I was like, I'll wear this again multiple times. Now I'm selling it on the real real. And I wore it once and it was $800. And I'm like, I think for special events, something like this can be really great. And then like if I was doing work wear, like I think it's, I think you

could mix. I think investing in like your black pants, your black blazer, like your really good basic stuff that you love. And then when you want to have like something so fabulous to wear to a wedding or New Year's Eve party, to rent it makes more sense. Because by the way, even Revolve, like Revolve pisses me off. I love them. But like even their plastic polyester silk dresses now are $700, $600. No, it's insane. It's insane. And they're all polyester. I love the girls on Instagram and TikTok doing like what I ordered from Revolve try-ons. I will say it's so true. And I keep, I'm such a sucker because I just did a new Revolve order because I'm going on a trip and I'm like, it does not look like it looks on the model. And I have like a pretty proportionate

body to a lot of the models that are trying stuff on. And nothing looks like that. It should look right on you at least. They're tucking. Exactly. They're snipping. Really is nothing is crazier than the difference. Instagram versus reality. No, it sucks. And then I literally did something the other day. There's this brand. I'm so sorry. I'm going to call you out for Love and Lemons, which I used to love back in like my Coachella days. I really want a baby doll dresses. I was like, I want it to be I want to be Olivia Rodrigo and have baby doll summer. So I ordered four baby doll dresses for them. They're each like $300. I knew I was only going to get one, possibly two. I got them and I was like, this feels like trash. Like the fabric was like, I was like, this is.

Does Hill House Home have any good baby doll dresses? Because I think that their dresses are really cute and they're great in person. They have good sales. Okay. I'll check it out. Yeah. I need a baby doll dress edit because all I want to, I want to have a baby doll summer, a baby doll European summer. Okay. Well, sorry, I haven't told you this yet. My bad week. My bad week is, as you guys know, I've had many tooth trauma.

I'm on my third set of veneers. My teeth, if you're new to the lady gang, I'll give you the Kohl's notes. My teeth didn't grow as a child. I've had horrible teeth my whole life. I had my first root canal in high school. I'm on my third set of veneers. I shudder when anyone wants to put anything near my teeth. All of my bad dreams are my teeth falling out.

So I've been going, I'm going for cleanings every four months because I'm a psycho and I like refuse to have any more dental work done. And I have had a horrible pain next to my nostril for three years, three, four years. And when I fly, it goes up when I get stressed, when I'm unslept, it gets more painful. And I can feel that it's attached to a tooth. I know it's a root problem. But I was like, there's no way I, it's so far up. I'm like, this is leftover residual teeth drama.

So what I do is every three weeks, I go get acupuncture on it and they like stick it. I feel the zing and then it gets a little bit better. Well, my dentist is like, actually, that's not okay. I need you to go for a CT scan. Guess what, guys? There's a giant hole in my face. No, no, no.

I have a rotten, a rotten, I have to go for a root canal next week. I have one tooth left that wasn't root canal he literally put the ice thing and he's like do you feel this I'm like no he's like do you feel this I'm like no I've had root canals on every tooth the one that I didn't number 11 it root it it is all infected up here there's a huge black hole on the sonogram and then he did a CT scan of my face it's like a penny is sitting on my skull like it's like you can see my two nostril bones and my mouth bones and then like a penny sitting right here on my face and there's a giant hole in my face and they're going to have to go get out the

infection because guess what? When you have an infection in your face, it literally eats away the bone. Oh my God. Well, can't it also turn into not like sepsis, but can't that like literally kill you? She's going, she's going. And she's like, I floss. I'm insane about my dental health. I'm flossing. And she's like, oh, you have a lot of blood on this tooth. And then she's like, and some pus. You're going to need to get this checked out. I was like, ah, like I really thought I was doing the right thing with the acupuncture. Obviously I was not. And, um, I want to die. There is nothing more scary. Like it was like Halloween than seeing your own skull. Have you ever seen your own skull in a CT scan? It's weird. I'm like, that's under me. And then to see the

hole, I was like, this is not okay. How do they do a root canal with a veneer? Do they have to take your veneer out? No, I cried. I literally cried. And I said, I can't do this. And I said, I'm going to need propofol for this. And they're like, well, we don't have that here. And I'm like, okay, well, how can you knock me out? He's going to go behind the tooth, drill where the real tooth is still left and then go up and kill the nerve and then suck it all the infection out oh my god but i put it off like it's like i think it's in three weeks or something because i was like oh i have this event i'm going to and i have a photo shoot and like because i know that this will become a thing where my whole face blows up like i've just been through enough dental trauma yeah

anyway sorry to my mouth when we come back we're gonna answer your questions now back to the lady gang okay so we are doing ask the lady gang today this was not an ask the lady gang that was turned into us it's something we saw on the facebook group but it was posted anonymously so i feel sorry kind of breaking the rules um but it was such a good question and i really wanted us to give our take because i was about to write an essay to this woman and then i was like no we could we could share this to everyone so i'm going to read it um i'm going to shorten it a little bit, but she basically says, husband refuses to help with raising totter. Anyone have a spouse that is unwilling to participate in challenging moments with their

child. My husband is not wanting to help out things that will make our two-year-old upset, mad, frustrated. It started with him getting to take a bottle when I needed to go back to work. He said it was too hard and he wasn't going to keep, quote, forcing it. So he would drive him to me and I would breastfeed on my breaks. The same thing with sleep training, sleeping in his own room. We now have a co-sleeper. Weaning off breastfeeding, he cries too much. Just give it to him. Now he nurses for sleep. Starting speech and occupational therapy for his speech delay was not his thing. And husband only sat for one session and will not attend anymore. And now I'm trying to potty train. He's not done anything to help him encourage him. He just sits and watches TV

or plays video games. I lost it yesterday when my son had a meltdown. I was trying to get him and I walked in front of the TV and he, husband told me I'm always in the way and we're making too much noise. When I addressed this, he told me he doesn't want to do these things. And when he's actually older and can understand our child, he'll start to help. I don't know what else to say. I grew up in a 50-50 house. I used to tell him that maybe while he didn't have a great example of what a dad is, he should be, want to be everything for that reason. Should I quit pushing and expecting him to change his outlook? Am I pretty much a married single mom? Oh my God. First of all, I am so, so sorry. That is so unfair. It breaks my heart for

you and you must be feeling like you're drowning in times. And so first of all, I'm sorry. Second of all, I do have a friend with a similar situation and unfortunately the only thing that changed it was an ultimatum. And the ultimatum was you must go to therapy. He also, this husband also had a, um, kind of like a absentee father. He didn't really have a hands on dad. And so he didn't really know what that looked like. And it's like, you can give them some leeway a little bit in that regard. However, she, you know, it had gotten to a tipping point where I think you're at if you're asking for advice and it's I'm truly unhappy and clearly I can do this alone because I feel like I am doing it alone and I want a partner who's in this with

me and not somebody that I resent and even if you're waiting for our kid to get older to quote like be more hands-on I will always carry I will harbor this resentment with me so this will this will eat away at our relationship. So it's, he needs deep therapy and you probably need to do some, some stuff together. But I think that he has to go on his own first, um, to figure out the block. Do you think therapy can work? Yeah. Do you think it's a block or do you think he's just lazy? Well, he's definitely lazy, but most men at their core are lazy. Most men are doing the things that they don't want to do because they know that they have to do that to keep their wife happy and to keep their family in a good place. And I'm not going to put any blame on her at all

whatsoever. But there could have been a period of time where you were passive about it because you didn't know how far it was going to go. And so it's not on you. And this is not me blaming at all. But you've created this arrangement. You've both have taken part in it. And it's probably like I am at times I have a very hard headed husband. And sometimes I'm like, I would much rather just do this on my own than and pick my battle because asking him for this thing is just going to be too hard. It's going to be too hard to fight with him. So I might as well just go do the thing myself. And unfortunately, if you do that over and over and over again, that creates a very passive situation. And so he's always going to assume you're going to do it. And it's

always going to be kind of okay because you're sticking around for it. Yeah. And it might have like obviously before you have kids it's so different so it's like his laziness and his like uh hard-headedness might have been easier to tolerate before you had a kid and I I honestly have nothing to say because I just feel so bad like that is such a hard situation to be in when you already have a kid and like he just seems like such a to make to to make you feel like you're in the way when you're just taking care of your kid because you're in the way of his television program, the sports or whatever. Like, I just feel so much for her that that's so, so tough. There was even a time with me. Sorry, I'll just say this one quick thing because it just came up.

There was this time with me and Zach where it also is resonating where you're saying he doesn't want to do the hard things like he doesn't want to be bad cop. And there was a point in time with me and Zach where he said to me, I feel like I'm the one that's always doing the bad cop thing and I need you to help me. And I heard it and I was like, you know what? You're absolutely right because it's creating a world where our son is going to really not look forward to the time that he's going to spend with his dad because if I'm the one that's always placing it on the dad to do the hard things. So if he cares about you and he cares about your relationship, you simply have to say, I am unhappy right now and I need a change. Yeah. I'm going to also say this is what I would

wanted to write in my essay to her because everyone was literally like in the comments being like divorce, divorce, divorce, leave this man. As someone who didn't grow up with children around, like we didn't have nieces, nephews, we didn't have babies in the family. I didn't have baby cousins that I was like watching out for. I truly know nothing about a baby and what they need. I've changed one diaper in my entire life. Like, and I'm just saying this because if your husband grew up in a place where he didn't have, like you said, Becca, like examples of this or even like ways to practice with like younger siblings or other people in the family, he clearly has no idea what to do. And I think that like, I think about myself in this situation is even when

I'm like wanting to babysit my friend's kids or like have them at my house, like you almost do nothing because you don't want to do it wrong. It doesn't sound like that's his situation. But also like, you know, it's it sounds like he doesn't think he's good at being a parent. So he's just like given up maybe. And so I would say like maybe pick one area that you can like empower him to be the boss of like you were talking about, like good cop, bad cop and be like, hey, I know you have no idea what you're doing. Guess what? I also don't know what I'm doing. This is my first time doing this too. Here's a book or here's a podcast to listen to when you're driving to work. Or here's a, I found this thing on Pinterest, this like printout about the best ways. What do you think?

Like, can we do this? Can we learn how to do this together? And maybe, I don't know, because he obviously likes a challenge. If he likes a video game, it's like, is there, is there like a duolingo version of like taking care of your kid where like, Like, there needs to be, like, an app, like, a parenting app where, like, learn how to do this and you get, like, a point. I don't know. I don't know the answer, but I just think. You're right. Empowering them to do the thing.

I don't know how to do it. It's, like, it's not because he was, like, take the bottle. I'm not going to force him. Well, sometimes, like, it's going to take. Well, then your kid's going to die because he's not eating. Sometimes you have to take a minute to figure out, like, what works, like, how to approach that baby. And like if the baby's never held by you or the baby's never disciplined by you, like it's not going to understand, you know, you're not going to know how to do it right. Like, no.

I also had this experience with my best friend. She just came to visit. She has an almost one year old and she and her husband came to visit. And this is like not I don't think what she I don't think this is what our person is dealing with. but I think that this is something similar that gets women into a situation that they don't love later where it's like they're left to do everything on their own and their husband is like kind of this like understudy of sorts and I watched her and I told her this in person so I'm happy to like to say it on this I started to see her asking her husband to help her with certain

things but then when he would help her with something she would then micromanage so he would bring her out an outfit to wear for the day and get her dressed and then he'd get her dressed and then she'd look at him and be like, well, she needs to have X, Y, and Z on. So just grab the blah, blah, blah. Or like he's feeding her breakfast and she's, and he, you know, he made her an egg and some fruit and blah, blah, blah. And she's like checking the expiration date on the products. And it's just, I get it as a mom. I have been so, you think you're the only one who can do it. And you're really anxious. Cause it's like, it's just a lot, but you have to be really cognizant. Just pick your battles and bite your tongue. If your husband is doing the thing that's

helping you, but not doing it the way you would do it or perfectly. You're listening to The Lady Gang. Okay, this one's really good. This next one, she said, Hey, ladies, long time listener. I've never written in. I'm feeling very embarrassed. I did something truly unhinged for a guy who isn't even my boyfriend. He needed money to borrow money. I lent him $9,000 and he said he'd pay me back. It was for a car and now he's gone. What's the craziest thing you've ever done in the name of a situation ship? Please tell me I'm not alone. Well, I would love to go through these other answers too, because I'm sure that they're

great. That is insane. Oh, that was an ask the lady gang, not a Facebook. No, this person emailed us. Oh. I am so sorry for your loss. You're never seeing that money ever again. Just think about Sally who bought the chickens on Summer House for Craig. Or not Summer House, Southern Charm. Oh.

Yeah. Wait, what happened? This girl was obsessed with Craig on Southern Charm on Bravo. And he's all into, he has bees in his backyard. He gardens. He does all the things. He's a pillow guy. Yeah. And they hadn't even hooked up. She just had a crush, but they were really good friends. And he mentioned in passing or something about it'd be cool to have chickens. And she went out as like this. She's like a full time working like medical sales device rep. And she bought chickens and built a house for them. And like she, you know, that was all because she and she admittedly was like, this is because I had a thing for Craig and now I'm getting rid of the chickens. So you're not alone.

I mean I think but the thing is we've I I haven't been in this position but like I could see how you could get there like you're falling you're falling in love you have your little crush and he's like hey I'm supposed to buy this car and like the check didn't clear from whatever the thing I was supposed to get and I'm supposed to get on Friday can you just like lend me the transfer the money and I'll pay you back like on Saturday when the check clears I think this is a good lesson you have to be so so careful who you loan money to yeah even friends because it can turn into a situation even family like this has happened in my family where it's like you loan money to a family member and then they just never pay you back and never pay you

back never pay you back and then it's resentment and then it's awkwardness and then it ruins your entire relationship like you just have to be so careful but this happens all the time I mean like the tinder swindler was all like based on that so it's always a man it's always a man truly you know as women don't be hard on yourself because as women we have integrity and we have we have we have our word and we usually stick to it and so when somebody says in our minds it's really hard to put ourselves in someone's shoes that's that big of a piece of shit because we're not pieces of shit. We would never do that to someone. And I could see I could have very easily gotten myself in that situation. I am just was never in it, luckily, but I could have done it. And I'm very

sorry. That sucks. And I would actually start being a psychopath and getting it back. That's when I would really, you know. OK, this is the last one. She says this might be controversial. I've had a best friend for many years, but suddenly I have a friendship. I don't know if I like her anymore and I can't stand to be around her but this is my best friend what do I have any of you had to deal with this how do you handle it thanks for everything you do I wish you would have told us what the ick was from I know me too um I haven't had the ick but I've had realizations especially with long-term friendships that are so intimate it's like a marriage. That's why all marriages don't last forever. It's like all friendships, best friendships

don't always last forever. And that's okay. You don't have a child with this woman. I don't think I mean, maybe sounds fun. You know, you don't share assets. So it's like even easier to get out of this, unfortunately. And I think you just start to take some steps back and see if she takes the hint. I think you don't have a sit down and break up because like I said, you're not married, but it's very similar. So it's okay to outgrow it. Just be less available. Be less available on text. Don't answer the call so often. I don't know. I mean, you might have to change your circumstances. Do you move? Because it could help to put some distance there if you're looking for a change. Well, I think that like, well, I don't know how old she is, but I'm going to assume she's a

millennial. It's there's no better excuse than just getting older than just not being that available. I agree with you. It's like unless something like actually happened, you don't need to have a conversation about it. Just being like something that you did really gross gave me the ick. Like that's that would be like life ruining, I think, to somebody to hear. So, yeah, I agree with you. Just like kind of let it let it fizzle a little bit. Maybe the ick will go away. Maybe you can bring her back in. That's true. I know for a fact people have had the friendship ick with me. And I think I've also had the friendship ick with other people. And actually, I feel the exact opposite of, well, okay. I feel the opposite of Becca because I will tell you that a lot of

times when I've gotten a friendship ick, or I'm sure people feel about me, it's usually about a version of me that is not like real true in our friendship. Like I've seen people post something on social media or go on a tangent in Facebook or you be in an event or, you know, something I heard through the grapevine or whatever. And then like, I'm like, oh, I don't know if they're like for me. Like, I don't, I don't know if like, like, were they joking? Were they not? Like, I just got like a weird vibe. And then the antidote to that for me has been to spend some real time face to face with them. Like often, like I just get turned off by like these little comments on social media or like whatever it is. And I'm like, oh, they've like really,

I don't think I'm like like them. And then if we spend time together, we actually go for a lunch and like get to the like back to just being friends. It does feel better. So I think we don't have enough information on this. There's either there's two answers here. Pull back or go closer just don't say where you are yeah you know but it's like sometimes like I can imagine that like some of the people even my parents are like who the f is this girl like do you know what I mean and then we spend yes and then they spend time with me and they're like no as a mother your parents are never I can tell you your parents are never hating any moment they spend with you. Like, that's just how it goes. But the other thing I just saw something, of course,

on Instagram about how and I've been taking this into account. Keep track of when you leave spending time with somebody if you feel better or worse. Yeah. And if you feel worse or exhausted or it's just was not rejuvenating, re whatever, you have to maybe give it a one strike, but a second strike in that person. And it could also be like you're saying, Kelty, a version of this person that you're not loving at this moment, which is also why Jack's advice to like give it, put it on ice and you can always revisit it. They could be in a better place and you could be in a better place. But yeah, I mean, if they make you feel not great when you're with them, it's a pretty good telltale sign of what you should do. Life is short. Yeah. Well, I love spending time with you

guys and um lady we're about to spend more time together i can't wait to go to chicago with you it's gonna be so fun i'm i'm really thinking about short shorts oh you know i'm not i know i don't think i've worn a short in four years i love it i want to tell you if you guys haven't asked the lady gang question you guys are loving this you can write them to us on our website there's a form but you can also write to us at hello lady gang at gmail.com anytime hello lady gang at gmail.com or you can just send us a DM on social. We're checking them every day. We love you guys and we will see you next Tuesday. Lady gang is hosted and produced by Kelty Knight, Becca Tobin and Jack Vanek with social media support from Kali Carrera, audio and video

editing from Jared Monaco and additional support from Steve Delameter and Podcast One. ozune gives you a better way to play in canada snipable insights so many tips you'll have the deepest roster in the league ozune well played