LadyGang - Two Ladies One Man with Bravo Star Alexis Bellino

Episode Date: August 6, 2024

Our guest today returns to the Real Housewives of Orange County in the middle of a situation Jac and Keltie have found themselves in before...what happens when 2 ladies in the same "circle" date the same guy. We discuss the new season of the hit reality tv show, and Alexis opens up about losing her mother just three months before filming started. Plus, in a special AITA segment we take your love triangle questions and decide if you are an *ass* (we still love you though!) Plus, a real look at Becca as a mom, Bad driving and a new name for the girls.  Check out our amazing sponsors!!! Boll & Branch: Need new sheets? Get 15% off PLUS free shipping on your first set of sheets at BollAndBranch.com/ladygang  PaleoValley: Ready to hydrate smarter? Head to paleovalley.com/ladygang for 15% off your first order!  Quote your car insurance at Progressive.com to join the over 28 million drivers who trust Progressive! Get your baby’s butt into Huggies’ best fitting diaper! Huggies Little Movers. We got you, baby.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

well what is this welcome to the lady gang that's amazing say that again the lady gang things are about to change around here each week we catch up with hollywood's hottest girl posse kelty knight becca tobin and jack vanik hello hello hello welcome to the lady gang i'm becca tobin here with jack vanik and kelty knight and a special guest so we're eating cookies i'm swallowing it i'm not gonna be gross I'm sitting here with little Ford Martin Because he is having a lot of Separation anxiety from us

This summer He just spent the last Hour with my mom and my sister And I heard him screaming in the other room So he's here with me now To do good week, bad week And he seems good He seems a little distraught

Do you want to try some of this? Yeah, say something How's your cookie? No, he says no, no. No, he's not a podcaster yet. All right. Well, let's get into it. Okay.

It's time for. Good week. Yes, it is. Bad week. Oh, no. If it's okay with you guys, I'm going to do mine and then I'm going to get off. Okay. Okay.

Want to read that? Honestly, I think this sticks as your bad week. Guys, this is my bad week. Okay. Well, this is motherhood and I'm going to leave the lady gang right now. okay we'll text you when alexis is on okay love you guys oh my god that's hilarious bye ford we love you bye honestly this is the most lady gang thing that's ever happened okay you want to go first or i'll go first uh i'll go first i'll go first okay so my good week is that

i am back in the lady gang facebook group hell yeah it's been a while i'm back in there and you know what? It is. I've been missing a lot. It's fun in there. I know. I know. I'm finally understanding what you keep talking about. I'm back in. No, I think it was just, we were at a very high pressure time when we had to like take a little break. But I think the way you came back in and everyone's like welcomed you with open arms and people are so into house stuff right now. Like you're the mayor of Lady Gang Facebook group. It really is. We have eight moderators around the world and we've changed a lot of things in the group so one of them is that they have to approve every post so we used to have it set up which was absolute chaos that like anything posted just went

up so you could literally be like jack vanek and it would like go up and it's like so now they're really moderating and they'll be like hey you know and we don't we don't let everything go through even if it's like a super normal conversation they'll just be like i think this is like a place where things could get ugly and girls could fight and that just seems like not something we want so we just keep it very chill but it's lovely well and that's the thing about facebook groups is like no matter what it is everyone ends up imploding if there's not any sort of like moderation going on it doesn't matter literally if it's mother theresa's facebook group like shit is gonna go crazy once it gets to be like a certain size so um but i love it i already there's

already another gal in there that has a tri-level house that she's like i need help renovating my how hard is a tri-level house i'm like oh let me get in there and then i love voting on people's outfits. Like I'm really having a ball. Like it's so, it's just so much fun in there. And I love all of our lady gang. It just feels a lot more connected being in there. Yeah. I love it. I know this like lady gang 2.0 is a real special thing. So once Becca gets a handle on her life, which as you just heard, she doesn't have, um, she's going to, she's going to pop back into, which is going to be really, really fun. But especially for tour, it's like, you know, picking our outfits, like girls are like, is this the vibe? I'm like, yes, but also you need that sparkly hat.

like I literally looked for a top hat that could be like I could take off and then a tiny top hat underneath shut up yes but they're not making tiny top hats the way they used to like on a headband it used to be like tons of options like hot topic style with like a little clip yeah and now it's like it's really just like jokey like Irish ones for like St. Patrick's Day and I was I was just disappointed by the ability like I'm gonna have to craft my own if I want it and i'm already crafting so much maybe they have um like a one for like a little kid or something like a baby top hat oh i figured it out i spent an hour in glam every day just like searching the internet for things for tour and trust me i really need you to do the top hat that's such a

funny idea funny right it's so good um but yeah i think everybody should send in their outfits for tour because i love voting on an outfit and i also love when i go to vote and my option is the same as everybody else's shows. I'm like, okay, I know that I'm like, I'm, we're in the same collective mindset right here that I didn't choose the ugly option. No, you're right. And you know, it's amazing. It's amazing. And so if you guys want to join the lady gang Facebook group, you just go on Facebook and then you search groups and it'll be the lady gang. And you have to answer three questions. Like who's your favorite member of the lady gang and the correct answers. Well, I had to join it and I had to answer all the questions. Yeah. And you were

like, Jack, it's me, mother. I saw you. I saw how you like, it's me. I'm here. Um, yeah. Join Facebook group. I love it. My bad week is I one of my nightmares came true and I rode in a driverless car. Did you see my post about that? They're called Waymo. They're only in Phoenix. I think I think it's like their test area. But it's an Uber that doesn't have a driver. It's a driverless car. And it is so insane. Like I'm sure I'm not the only person that has nightmares where you're in a car and all of a sudden nobody's at the wheel. And your mind's always going down my parents like they live on a hill it's going down their hill at full speed just total chaos um and I think it just means you don't have control in your life or something that's what that dream

means but yeah they have them and they pick you up they just like show up you get in you can like play your own music they have help like if you press a button and you need help with something and then they just drive you to your destination in it's it's crazy it's crazy that they they work did you feel like the driverless car was a good driver yes i did like a better driver than kelty yes there was like even a situation where it went into those like you know the middle line that have like both ways can go to turn like a turn lane for both yeah and it went in there and this other car like zoot like was gonna like go in at the same time and it corrected itself like right away it's very reactive to things going on it's just really scary because you feel like it doesn't have any

idea what it's doing. And I'm sure that there's errors that happen all the time with it, but there's human errors of people driving people. So many people shouldn't even be on the road. So I kind of trust the driverless car, but it is the weirdest feeling in the world because you're looking up and the wheel is moving around and there's nobody there, but it was a nightmare, but I enjoyed it. Let me tell you this. I feel like we're so connected right now in our lives Okay. Because my bad week also has to do with driving. Oh God. Okay. So I was so excited to go. I have found the Holy grail of anti-aging treatments. So this is not my good week, but I'm just as a pre story. So I'm trying to be a better wife. And so like a couple of weekends

ago, Chris was like, do you want to go meet our friend for lunch? And I was like, not really. It's a Saturday. Um, I would rather just be at home with my books and my dog, but I was like, sure. And he was like, okay. And they went, we went to this place that made, it was like this hole in the wall place in Pasadena that made very spicy food. None of this I enjoyed. But what I did find when I was walking out is next door was this place called Shiatsu of Pasadena. Now I know that I'm never going to be able to get an appointment after I talk about this on the podcast. Like I'm very, like having a very skinny confidential moment where like now she's going to say like go anyway it was 160 which is so spendy for a facial but like it was 90 minutes and they did

cleanser of mask and then like half an hour facial massage gua sha cupping on the face where they like cup your chin and then they drag it so you didn't get like the hickey marks then a full face and body acupuncture like i probably had 60 needles in my face and then they put this giant dome on me for anti-aging light and then dome. Yeah, no, no, it was not oxygen. It was blue light or red light or whatever. And then they took it off and they did a collagen mask with like fibers in it that like sat on your face. So it was 90 minutes. It wasn't like extractions. There was no like steam. There was none of that. I swear to God, my skin, it was better than Morpheus. I know that's wild. Like I've done every laser under the sun, not right away. Like I didn't walk out of

beauty, but like two days later, the amount of puff, it was like a lymphatic exercise for your face. And I've never had, it was great. I will be doing it before all the big red carpets. Like I really feel like it worked anyway. That's not, that's not part of my story, but I was that, that's just like where I was going. Wait, is it, it's just the, it's one random place. It's not like that's the type of massage it's just the place no no it was like this this woman this acupuncturist facialist in pasadena but um it felt very much like when i was in hong kong when i lived in hong kong for the summer like 20 years ago we used to go across the street to this place and they would do like a similar treatment yeah um but it was just like i think it was just like getting

the muscles to move and all that anyway i feel amazing i really am happy with the treatment but here here's where the bad week was i made the appointment on a friday which is i don't have e news on friday and derek doesn't work on fridays he only works four days a week normally and so i had to drive myself and you know i'm the worst driver well there's a street in pasadena first of all one-way streets i hate you you're only supposed to exist in europe like if you're a one way street. This street in Pasadena is four lanes, like how it looks. It should be two lanes going one way and two lanes going the other way, but it's just four lanes going all one way. So I'm driving and I pass the place and I wanted to U-turn to like go park in front of it. And I make

the U-turn and then I hit, I hit like a, um, what's it called in the cars? Like an intersection. I hit an intersection and I'm, there's two, there's cars on the right and left, like that are stopped at the red and I would technically have the green, but I look up and there's no traffic lights. And I was like, there's no traffic lights. I don't know if I should go or stop. So I'm like on the break and then or whatever. And then they're all honking at me and like shouting at me. And I was like, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I don't know where I'm going. I'm lost. I realized I was driving the wrong way down the one way street. And the reason there was no lights is because the lights only face the other way because it's a one way. I was looking at the back of the

lights. Oh my God. And I was so lucky. It was like a Friday at 10. There was no one on the road because I it was very confusing and then I just remembered why I don't drive places I've never been what do you what do you think is more embarrassing you doing that or me driving over the spike strip and blowing three of my tires you mind driving through the spike strip is like it's my worst nightmare and so funny especially because you are like in the lady gang known as the best driver of the lady gang which doesn't say a lot but yeah it says nothing it's literally but like Becca's always crashing into things. I'm a terrible driver. Like you're all we have. Like when we have to drive ourselves, we're like, yeah, I am the driver. Yeah, that's true. You

know? Um, okay. So, but I do have a good week. So my good week is that Derek named has come up with a name for you and Becca. So now that Derek, my assistant is working for me. Um, he's doing a lot more lady gang stuff now that he sort of has like Kelty life on lock. He's now doing some lady gang stuff. And when he needs to say something to both of you, like when he needs to ask a question, he's like, do I need to ask Becca and Jack? He has found a way to save time and he has named you Jekka. Oh my God. Jekka or Jekka? Jekka. Jekka. So he says, he says, do we need to run this by Jekka? You know, cause sometimes, or he's like, he's like, do I need to get approval from Jekka? And then I'll be like, send this to Jekka. And he knows to send it to both Becca and Jack.

That's cute. It's our celeb name. Isn't that so cute? And I'm like, what's up with Jekka? I love it. He's like, have you talked to Jekka? Did Jekka know? I'm like, can you check if Jekka is available for this date or whatever? It's great. And I'm into saving time. So. I love it. I'm into it. We don't have Jekka today because Ford's having a meltdown, but it's real life. Listen, I think it's so funny on TikTok, all of Becca's mothering clips go viral because like, it's real. It's real. She's trying to like, the baby only wants mom and it's podcast time. You know? I know. I'm like, Ooh, I'm going to put off kids a little bit longer. Well, you know, I mean, people are not that we don't get into politics on this, but I, uh,

this podcast, but I was pretty upset to hear that people are like childless cat ladies being mean to them. And then I was like, you know, a childless lady can get more done because no baby is trying to get my attention right now i locked my dog in another room i and i'm making to-do lists so don't come for the childless ladies because we can really get shit done it's very very true you know what i mean yeah um okay when we come back alexis bolino from the real housewives of the oc is here and becca has put her child down for a nap and she's back now back to the lady gang okay guys Our guest today is a longtime fan favorite member of the Real Housewives of the OC, a dog-loving, hopeless romantic who is living, laughing, and loving her way through life.

She returns to the OC this season of the show with a new lease on life and a new man, and it's feeling very Jack and Kelty. We'll get into that in a minute. Here to discuss Housewives, holding down a house, and sharing an ex is the very beautiful Alexis Bellino. Welcome to the Lady Gang Queen. Hi, girls. Welcome.

Wow, that was nice. Thanks. So the most important thing that you need to know about Lady Gang. So Jack Kelty, Becca here, Jack and I share a mutual X. Yeah. And so this is the perfect, this is the perfect podcast for you to appear on for this season of OC. So you're not judging me.

I get one person on the planet or two that don't judge me. No, it's the reason why we're such good friends and why we're business partners is because of our mutual X. So we understand. Well, it brought you guys together then. There you go. Yeah. You're in the awkward moment right now where one of you, you're still dating him. So you, you know, we don't know if this is your forever person. You may never get to a Jack

and Kelty. I won't ever get there with Shannon. No, this is my forever. And so it's, it, yeah, it's not going to look like we'll be in business together in the future. But I need to tell you girls something real quick before I know, I know we're supposed to only have 30 minutes and if we go over, I don't care, by the way, this was a, this was not my decision that we had 30 minutes anyways. But so I've been listening to you girls for, I mean, my kids were 14, 14 and 15. Cause they were, I was taxi cab for that entire time. So in between running everywhere with them, waiting in carpool, all of that, I would listen to you guys and healthy. One of the episodes, there was something, I love your good week, bad week, by the way, but there was something you,

there was one episode where you were so honest or raw. You're like, my bad week is I have a yeast infection or something. And there's been many since then. I peed my pants. I was like, this is so funny. This is very flattering. We are, this is an honor. This is an honor. Wow. I feel so cool. So first of all, I, you know, listen, so this is a really, for people who don't, you know, we get a lot of comments that people are like, well, I didn't know if you're not watching this season of OC housewives, you absolutely have to watch, but just a little backstory. So Alexis was on many years ago. Um, she was in a different marriage. We've seen her go through this divorce. Now she's back on the show. She's longtime friends with, you know, Heather and some of the OGs,

which is amazing. You're back. Um, you're, you're back. You look fricking amazing, but you are now in love with John Jansen, who is Shannon Bedore's ex. And so it has been a real lunchtime dinner party from hell situation for you guys. But I actually think this, and the reason we wanted to invite you on lady gang only, not only because we're housewives fans, we have so many girls that are in blended families, um, mixed things like this. And I think this is something that people don't talk about. And so the fact that, you know, girl a needs to see guy with new girl and how to handle that, how to be the new girl, how to be the ex girl. Like, I think this is a really interesting conversation for women. And we've never had the opportunity to have it before.

So I want to get to that. But before we do, how is it to be back? It's been, oh God. I mean, honestly, it depends on, I've had this question a lot and it depends on the minute or the hour, because there are so many emotions that go in. People don't realize that filming a reality show is very difficult. It is not, it's not, and not just everyone can do it. Not just everyone can be a reality person because it is, it's taxing on your, your mental health because of the fact that you're like, oh my gosh, I really said that. And you get home and you're beating yourself up all night,

but then you're like, well, that was a funny moment. And so you go through all this emotion of, like scripted, you guys, a lot of you know, is like you take your hat off and you're not Alison anymore. You can go back to being Alexis. But in reality, it doesn't work that way. So it's you and whether it's edited

or whether it really is something you effed up, it's there for good. So it's just hard. But I've loved being with the girls. I've missed Heather and Tamara so much. We've all stayed in contact. Obviously you can tell it's, you'll see through the season it's an organic friendship and I've really loved meeting the

new girls like I have a true friendship it's not I feel like some of the reality shows I don't know if I should say this but I feel like some of the housewives franchises or any of the reality shows it's like they're there for a job but they don't really have a friendship but like Jen and Katie and I go to lunch once every couple weeks like we try to stay connected I talk to Heather and Tamara a lot you know it's like we don't have the time to just be out shopping or doing bonbons because we're busy but it's fun because they're our friends and we're gonna have hiccups and we're gonna fight and you guys are gonna get to see it all but it's just it's it's been really cool it also works for this season with the love triangle well it's not a love triangle but

whatever you call it because it's it's not producers that are just throwing you in to like piss people off it's that you're genuinely friends with all these other girls and then the ex happens to be in the same friend group like that happens all the time all like kelsey saying everywhere yeah but the the weird part about this and why it's such a good season and why it is true reality is because when I was being talked to about coming back on the show I didn't even know John's name I didn't even I didn't even I did he wasn't even in my hem my hemisphere at all because I hadn't been watching a lot I watched a little bit when Tamara came back because I was excited to see her and Heather's my friend so I was watching her too a little but John was not

even a a thought or a nothing and so in November 18th is the day I met him and I was talking to them before that so a lot of the misconception out there is that I'm on the show because I was dated him and started dating him and and we didn't start dating right away we stayed friends and tried not to date knowing what this would do and be like and I was talking about going back and still thinking no I just don't think I'm ready I just lost my mom I wasn't I wasn't as strong as I am now. And you'll see a lot of that through this season. I am an emotional basket case because my mom, I started filming three months after my mom passed and she was my ride or die. Like she was my purse, my soulmate person, you know? So she, thank you. And I'm not going to get emotional.

I promise myself that every time I talk about it, but it's important for the story of everybody understanding me coming back because I, I didn't know if I was going to come back or not. And then John and I become really good friends and the tabloids are all saying, Oh, we're dating. And I was mad. Cause I'm like, we are not dating. So I was putting stuff out on Instagram and out in the media, kind of like slapping him in the face. Like, yeah, he's my good friend. And we are kind of attached at the hip, but we're not dating. And then it happened. And then I did end up signing. So it all kind of was like a real thing, you know, and John and I went back and forth. Like if, if we, we wouldn't kiss or touch or do anything because we were like, if we become

something, this has to be like legitimate, like real, because otherwise we are going to be the villains and it is going to, we're going to be the villain no matter what, but it's going to be horrible. Whether I go back to housewives or I don't, we're going to get annihilated and it happens and it is still happening, but it's, you know, it's all so organic how it happened. And I want you girls to know that. Yeah. What I thought was interesting is that like, it appeared so for so long that John like hated being on reality TV. Like it was like, and maybe that was because he was maybe not with his right match. Do you know what I mean? But it was like, he kind of seemed grumps and like, didn't want to like play. And like, you know, he, he really enjoyed driving

the boat, but other than that, like was not like, he wasn't a Terry Dubrow where you were like, Oh, you know more about it than I do. I haven't seen any of those episodes. So he like, he just didn't seem like, and that might've been because he was maybe not in a relationship that was serving him. Cause we've all been that person where we're not our best selves. So he seemed like he wasn't super happy to be there or like whatever. And so when we saw you guys get together, I was like, wait a second, this is so crazy because this is a man who like, does not want to be in the spotlight. He does not want to be a part of this world. So that must have been like a big conversation, right? Cause you're going back to the show. This is your livelihood. This

is a world you've been in. And it's like, Oh God, like this is going to be a part of his life again. like was he like was there ever a discussion of you going on without like any of you couldn't possibly do without your relationship that would have been weird there's twofold to this answer for you number one a lot of the rumors and things you have heard about john are not true and they came from a source that is uncredible which you will find out this season as it unfolds okay i'm gonna leave it there wink wink okay um so the fact that he did not want to be on camera was a lot of it because um well there were certain things that were happening behind the scenes obviously and also they didn't have a good relationship right but it wasn't he was so scared of being on camera

she was trying to cover up some of the things that was happening behind the scenes and then saying oh he doesn't want to be on camera well there's so much more to the truth of that that i can't get into however don't believe everything you've heard about him or any of it actually because it's all false and I will be making it clear. Okay. But, um, the other part to that is, yes, we did have the conversation and he, he, he actually, you're getting firsthand information here. Um, he actually offered to pay me what they were going to pay me to not go back on the show. Okay. As much as he's like, I love you enough. I don't want you to do it. I it's a toxic world. And, and, you know, our relationship is too pure and natural and great. And I don't want them to rip this up.

And I had just come from, you know, as you saw on previous years of when I was on the show, I quit my career. I, I am a college educated woman. I had a very good career as making 80 grand out of college when I met Jim and I quit my career, which I know that doesn't sound like a lot. You can't even live. You can't even have anything here for 80 grand, but it was a lot for me, you know, at the time. And I quit because Jim and I wanted to raise a family. I wanted to be the stay at home mom and be the full dedicated mom and wife and all of that, which I know I get judged for, but that is people can make that decision. It is leave it to beaver. There's the women's movement that everyone needs to work. And you girls are such go-getters. And now obviously

I want to work and I don't want that anymore. My kids are grown, but you know, I looked at him and I just said, Johnny, I, I love you, but I have to do this for me. I already did this with Jim. I'm not going to make that mistake again. And I don't know if all, how long it'll last or what it is but I do feel that I want to go back because I had a psychic reading and my mom said you need to go back because I was saying no to Bravo and I said no to going back and then the night I had a four o'clock um it was 4 p.m the next day that I had to have my decision in by or something like that and I was like it's a no and so I called my psychic and I said I need a reading didn't tell her what it was about I said I have to make a decision and I was a no up until I met with her

and then my mom came through and said girlfriend Jesus didn't take the wheel I did now you get your big girl pants on and you go and you you're going back and so jesus take the wheel is my mom and i song and she had just passed and so i was like whoa i called john right away and i said honey i'm sorry i am going back and he's like you just said no you weren't i'm like sorry going back called my agent like or my manager everything just flipped and i was like okay and i never looked back from that point on it was like this is we're doing it babe we're doing it holy shit I love that. He's been very supportive.

He doesn't, you'll see, he doesn't film this year with me. And he, you know, has done red carpets and he isn't shy about being out, especially we're happy and in love. So if he wants to tote along with me, it's kind of the package deal, you know, my kids are my deal. My job is my deal. So I want to go back to you talking about, you don't have to talk about it, but just the fact that you're grieving on national television on a reality show three months

after losing your mom. And I know that it must have been really, really hard. And I'm sure there's moments that you're going to watch and be like, who is that person? It's a little grief makes people unrecognizable. I can't think of the examples, but I feel like we've seen a couple of women go onto a reality show a couple months

after a big loss like that. And I'm happy- Lisa Rinna is a great example. Yes. And I'm actually thrilled that we now can watch women do something like this, even though it's not your proudest moments, but it's just to show the world if you haven't gone through something that's so heartbreaking, that's such deep grief, that like it kind of gives you more permission as a grieving person to like have it

out there so much. I don't know if this is making sense. But it's like, if you have never lived with it, and you've never seen it close and firsthand, you can watch these women on shows that you feel like you know for several years and then they go through something so traumatic or sad and it's like oh we all change at those times like we are not ourselves in those times and it's actually like nice to be able to portray that on a reality show as hard as it is because now we give people I know for myself I give a lot of women in my life so much leeway when they're grieving and a lot of has been watching women do it on reality TV. Yeah. It's, it's funny because I, my mom died in August. I reached out to Spencer. Who's my, my, on my team. And I said, I'm ready to work.

I think it was September ish, October. I said, I'm ready to work. If you'll take me back and housewives is not, or if you'll take me as a client and housewives isn't an option, I'm ready to go to work. Like I've done commercials. I've done scripted. I've done, you know, I've done other things. I'm like, I I'm ready. So just let's do it. Let's dive in. Cause I needed something to get me out of bed every day. I was having, I went through a really dark time after she passed. And I, I was like, I either have to pick myself up and get up out of bed and do something, or I'm going to become a statistic too. You know? So I, I did. And he said, no problem. And we started working and it was awesome. I didn't know the roller coaster I would go through when you throw

yourself behind cameras or in front of cameras when you're still grieving. There's so many times I cry that are weird or just like, and the stress of there's some other things that this is such a good season. I can't, I can't spoil anything. You guys know that, but like, there's a couple of times when like the ladies can sense things or know things. And it's just like, I mean, the tears just come and I know it's still part of the process in my mind. I'm like, gosh, this is not going to read great on camera because I look like an idiot, but it's really, I'm still grieving. I'm still emotionally, you know, and a lot of what people don't understand is I lost my mom and my fiance at that time on the same on the same week. I broke it off with my fiance on that same week.

So I lost my past, which is my mom and my future vision that I had future in my future, you know, at the same within five days of each other. So I was just so heartbroken beyond like just losing a mom. I was, I was beyond heartbroken. And obviously my ex fiance and I went through a lot of like, you know, okay, we've got to try to make work. Can we, can we not for the next couple of months before I met was before I met John. But that's also part of the equation, which is so interesting is like, how can you have loved someone and thought you were going to be engaged or be married to them. And then all of a sudden fall so deeply in love. But Johnny and I started as best friends and he was picking up the whole time. He was picking up all these broken pieces of my

mom and all that. And just putting, it was like, literally he was putting pieces back together for me. He's building me back up, like, like helping me just get through each day. And it's what I needed. And, and if people say he got you at a vulnerable time, yeah, he probably did, but guess what? He's my rock. And he, we have such a relationship that no one will understand until it starts to unfold more on TV. You know, do you think your mom sent him to you? I do. And I said, I've said that in another podcast on the two T's in a pod. I, on that day on November 18th, I was literally leaving the restaurant with my two gay friends and they're my really close buddies.

And we had paid the check and we were leaving and he walked in and sat down in the booth next to me. And he had a friend with him, a girlfriend, a friend girl with him that was, um, had done, uh, we'd been in philanthropy stuff together and we just knew each other through town kind of thing. And she comes over and she sits down and she's like, oh my gosh, John's right there. you guys were on the same TV show. You should talk and say hi or whatever. And I was like, oh, okay. Oh, hi. Hi. And so then his whole group came to my tape, my booth, and we all just

started powwowing. And that's how it happened. But it was like, I was so anti ever going to date. I wasn't even looking at a guy at all. It was just single. Right. And I wasn't even thinking about anybody being hot or not, or taking me on a date. I was going to sushi with a couple other guys just that were friends that were wanting, wanting a little bit more or what have you. but like, you know, I, I just was at such a weird place and I swear on everything in my body that my mom was like, he is for you. Like this is the one Lex. That's so crazy. Okay. Not to change the subject, but there's another very questionable thing happening on, uh, OC this season that we must discuss. Okay. Um, I have so many things to say about Jennifer, but I'm not saying anything.

I'm keeping, I'm going to wait until the end of the season, but the most important thing I need to say is Ryan and Jen are drinking Malibu rum and diet Pepsi. What the actual Alexis? Why is that? So why does that make everybody so weird? I mean, I tasted it. It is, it does taste like a little pint or coconutty Coke, you know, Coca-Cola, but so yeah, it's just their thing. It's their thing. And look at their bodies. So if that's what you need to drink to look like, working okay i mean i'll pump that stuff in here okay also gassed when i heard the order it was really alarming but that's like a go-to drink order that's their go-to drink order but i think that they could corner the market here and have some sort of a line that could be her business

venture like maybe it's some sort of tell her you said that i'm gonna tell her she could crush because it probably and you know i also in my mind when i heard the order i was judging it and going ew gross but then i thought i bet it tastes delicious it's very sweet and i don't like i used to love sweets and now i'm like the salt and vinegar girl like i'm like just dump the salt in my mouth but um it's very sweet but it is good it's it's like light and refreshing and it kind of makes you feel like you're gonna go lay on the beach somewhere you know oh my god it makes me feel like i'm throwing up in the back of like a forest in high school no it's very high school juice and Yeah. Malibu rum is like, what's that? What's that wine? Yes. Green and purple wine. Yeah.

Well, it's like a syrup. I didn't know it was the year. It must be a big deal for you to even have brought it up. So I didn't even know it was like such a big thing out there. You know, I just think it's them. So I was like, Oh, okay. You're welcome. Okay. Um, so when we come back with alexis we have collected a lot of uh this famous you know am i the asshole is is the thing on reddit but we collected them from our lady gang group and they all have to do with x sort of circular jack kelty alexis situation so we're gonna vote and see uh if our girls are assholes when we come oh gosh you're listening to the lady gang am i an asshole i i feel like my friend is

has ridiculous standards am i a jerk if i tell them that their dating standards are too high oh god oh god i have a friend right now like that though i'm just like you are turning so what she's saying is she's her friend is turning away too many other good guys because of one little thing like he drinks milk from a straw kind of thing yeah like drinks malibu ramen diet coke but milk from a straw is also disgusting i literally have a friend i hope she never listens to this because she's gonna know she has actually had this talk with her i'm like you need to just it's not like dumbed down but it's like nobody's perfect and and unless you're 22 you're never going to find someone that doesn't have baggage of some sort. So it's like, yeah, you know what,

if there looks as everything you wanted, or if they don't drive the car, you expect them to have or they haven't reached the goal you want them to have at this time in their life. It's like there's things you've got to you've got to have a checklist of your top five, I firmly believe in that and write them out and manifest it. But other than that, it's like, you're gonna have to like, let some things go, sweetie, I'm sorry. Well, and it's like anybody that has these, like the ridiculously high standards, it's always materialistic or it's how much money they make. It's never like, I really just want to find somebody that's kind and not a murderable. And yeah, it's always like, I need to find somebody rich and six, five. So it's like,

it's never the stuff that matters as somebody who did that for a long, long time. Toes done, toenails done perfectly or grooved. I mean, there's just so many stupid things that people say. I mean, but I can't, if he doesn't get his toenails, I do agree with that, but it's almost like if he missed a couple months or whatever, that's true. But like, it doesn't have to be as on point as all of us. I mean, I mean, I want it to be groomed also in every area, but like, yeah. So I just think there's a lot of standards that are a little too, everyone has high standards. Don't get us wrong. We live in California, but, oh, by the way, Jack, you just moved to OC. She's the newest housewife. I know you want to hang out. I need

friends. You better be ready for that phone to ring. I'm telling you, Bravo's going to be calling you. Oh, yes, please. Yes, please. I could never. It's my nightmare. It's my dream. Okay. So this one's for you, Alexis. She says, Alexis, I so feel you. I dated this guy who was a total loser. I mean, cheated on me constantly, was dating three of us at one time. It was bad. He posed nudes of me online. Yes, charges were pressed. This is so dark. Anyway, I moved in with him and he had a roommate who owned the condo. Well, said roommate and I got to be good friends, like best friends. who would come from home from the gym and see me crying on the couch and say, why are you doing this to yourself? One night we went to a Halloween bar crawl and I got wasted. He took care of me

that night. And when he thought I was asleep, he confessed to me that he was in love with me. About a year later, he thought she was asleep. Well, he thought she was passed out. Yeah. Yeah. So he was whispering to her. He was saying it like she's in a coma. Does he look necrophilia too? This is questionable. This is crazy. about a year later i realized that i had friends feelings for him after he started dating another girl i confessed my feelings and we started dating we got pregnant a month into dating we've been together nine years and married for two he's my absolute best friend and our story is so unique i had to break bro code and lost some friends but i'm super happy and know i did

the right thing girl i love that story and i'm i'm like this is a this is a hallmark movie okay without without them without the likes without the little bit of okay but this is such a great story i need to i need to address one part of this though she referred to breaking boy code and one of the or bro code or whatever one of the things out there right now is that i broke girl code with dating him because of shannon which i don't even want to say the name so i'll just say she from now on however but you guys were not friends not friends were you ever on the show together Never on the show together, so never filmed. Didn't know her from any, like, whatever. Like, there was no girl code broken with this relationship with John, okay? And by the way, if we had been, the love that John and I have is so off the charts and unstoppable that I think I might have broken girl code. I want the rumor to die because it didn't happen. But I'll be honest and say, I don't think that I think John and I could have fought it for a year or two or whatever. But I think the universe was, was moving to put us together. Like it was just going to happen no matter what. And that was my mom on the other side saying she deserves him. He's the greatest guy ever. He's been wronged in the media by somebody who we shall remain nameless. And, and it's you guys are meant to be.

Have you heard anything from your ex-husband regarding you going back on the show? I mean, we're, we're friendly. I, you know, when we've raised, my kids moved in with me full time a few years ago, but so we're still co-parenting. Um, and he moved to Palm desert to get a rut, do a restaurant. So we've just had a lot of moving parts in our, our, uh, co-parenting, but, um, he, you know, doesn't have any say in it. And he didn't really give me any advice other than, yeah, like everybody needs a job and you need to do something to get out of bed. but you know we don't really have a conversation we don't talk he he called me after the first episode and was like wow you nailed that like good job I'm so proud of you that kind of thing

yeah but other than that I mean and and you know John and him have met we've been at family events together with them in the same room because it's just like I mean Jim and I've been divorced for six years now and we have 16 16 and an 18 year old and a guy he'd go into college and it's like there's just too many things people are going to get married start getting married and grandkids and all this stuff coming about in our family soon and so it's like we have to just merge the families together so it's been it's been interesting but good i'd say good thanks i also think it's like um before we get to this next one like at a certain point it's like this the circles are small do you know what i mean like we think there's this like big huge world out there

but it's like we know that like you know people at work kind of meet each other or people who run in this, go to the same restaurant. Like, I mean, the world is not that big. So it's not crazy to think like at a certain age or at a certain time, or even when you're young, I guess, but like, there's only so many people that are like divorced, single, still looking for a lot, like, you know what I mean? So it's not that crazy. It's so funny you say that because in another interview I had, I said almost the exact same thing. I'm like, by the time John's 61. And by the way, I, Jim was 61. And I was like, I don't ever want to, 55 was my cutoff. That was my dating, I was like, and I know I was putting myself in a box, but that, so I was kind of being

like the first person that you were talking about or lower your standards. But like, I was like, I'm not going to 61 again. I'm going to stay at 55 and under. And I meet him, but what, wait, where were we going with this? No, it's like a small circle. Like there's not that many, it's hard to find love anyway. There's not going to be anyone that hasn't had a girlfriend or a boyfriend that you know of, or have talked to, or have some way the spider web is just small. It's just, yeah. I said the exact same thing. Okay. The next, am I the asshole? My husband, Mark died in a car accident five years ago. His best friend Edgar was the best man at our wedding and they were friends for their entire adult lives. I always liked him before, but we never

had more than a passing friendship while Mark was alive. Edgar was really the only person who's consistently been there for me. And we've talked about it and we both have romantic feelings for each other and have decided to give dating a try. Mark was the only person I ever date before. we were childhood sweethearts. Am I the asshole? I say, no, I say that her Mark probably aligned, tried to align some of that as well, because he knows his best friend as a good person, like from the other side knows his best friend as a great guy. And probably was like, she can't be alone the rest of her life on this planet, you know? So I don't think that's an asshole. And I think the fact that they both took a little, like took time, kind of like John and I

were like, this is going to be, this has to be real. And it can't just be, Oh, we have like some chemistry. We need to know there's another step to that. I think that that shows that they both have respect for Mark and have respect for the situation they were getting into. So I say no, not an F. Yeah, I agree. It's very common after spouses pass away for the remaining widow or widower to actually have a relationship. Sometimes it's just sex, which is crazy, but real, with someone who was close with the dead person well and it's very common you're so hurting you're you're you're so in so much pain anything that will give you any kind of joy or make you feel good it's like that's what you need at the moment you know you're broken in pieces yeah well and

with her it's been five years so it's not like a sort of like you're in the grieving and you're doing you know things that you probably normally wouldn't do it wasn't like tomorrow like they buried him yesterday and tomorrow they're together you know it was like five years yeah so i don't yeah, I agree with you guys. Okay. Here we go. This one's good. My sister started dating again and I always call her after her dates to ask her how it went. During this time of swiping and dating, it seems that she matched with my boss. She never told me about their date until a year after. And during that time they'd gone on dates. My boss, who I really rarely talk to outside of professional capacity, started sort of having chit chats with me. And there was a hint that I was

getting special treatment. When she told me she was dating my boss, I felt betrayed. I felt angry at my sister, angry at my sister and angry at my boss. All of what I thought had been the rewards of my hard work now felt like the product of their relationship. And I have to go back to work knowing that on one end, I'm happy for her on the other. I'm just mad. Am I the asshole? You're not a weird situation. It's a very weird situation, but in my opinion, like the, the sister should have told her like that is, that is too much information to keep from someone that close to you. If it was your neighbor or somebody kind of like on the perimeter of your life. No, but your sister's your inner circle, like your inner people. So I would have

been very upset about that. And it does make you feel like I am not this great of an employee. I'm getting it because my sister's banging the boss. You know, I wonder if they ever had a conversation about it. Like that's so awkward. She would have mentioned that we need to know. So send back in more details about that. Yeah. This is also a cat. This is the plot for a Catherine Heigl movie. Did you guys see that one with Catherine Heigl, Malin Ackerman and Ed Norton? He's the boss. Katherine Heigl works for him. It's a great movie. I wish I could remember the name. But in this version, Katherine Heigl also has a crush on the boss and then he falls in love with her sister. Oh my God. Great movie. Great movie. What's the name of that? I don't know. It's

Katherine Heigl, Ed Norton. You have to look it up. And Malin Ackerman. I need to watch that. Yeah. The sister, that seems weird that the sister didn't, but maybe the boss was like, please do me a favor. Or no, that's weird. That would be weird for him to ask her to keep this from her sister. That's strange. It's strange. Once they had date number four or five and they knew it was going to be something and Kat needed to come out of the bag. I get keeping it hidden for a minute, like just a hot second to take a break and go, okay, maybe we're only going to have two dates and then it's over. But like to keep it going for that long, it's just, it's just weird. So awkward. Okay. This is so messed up. This is our last one. Okay. See if you can follow

this is a little confusing as love lives tend to be. I have been dating my ex-sister-in-law for five months now. So it's a guy, this is a guy or is it a lesbian relationship? Maybe it's my ex-sister-in-law. So is it a guy writing in? I think this might be a boy. Okay. I've been dating my ex-sister-in-law for five months now. It's been a secret, passionate, and wonderful. I'm 27 and she's 24. She divorced. Oh, this is a boy. Okay. This is so sorry. I didn't realize we had boys in our group, but here we go. That's what I was going to say. That's I was shocked. A male was writing in, but I was like, maybe it's a lesbian couple. So then that would make, I don't know. He's straight. Okay. Listen, I've been dating my ex-sister-in-law for five months now.

It's been a secret, passionate and wonderful. I'm 27 and she's 24. I divorced my 30. She divorced my 30 year old brother a year ago after four years of dysfunctional marriage. I knew throughout the entire i knew her throughout the entire time and we never crossed any line but we became best friends we have similar outlooks on life she and my brother were not compatible they had a bad breakup i initially stayed away but we've been so close for so long i decided to message her we hit it off and now i can say i love her very much and i think she's my soulmate i haven't told anyone except my sister and my brother my mom thinks i shouldn't be dating my brother's ex-wife and my sister thinks i should absolutely keep it a secret from my brother i feel like the past is

past, but if we love each other, that's enough. Am I the asshole? Jesus Christ. I don't, can I plead the fifth on this one? I think it's too close. No, even if it's your soulmate, like that's going to make every single time you see your brother so awkward and like horrible. Your entire family is affected by this too, because it does, it does affect every holiday, every birthday, every wedding, every, every conversation that you're going to have with anybody in your family. it's so uncomfortable. I think if the brother moves on to someone he's madly in love with and has a beautiful relationship with, I think that that's fine to then maybe reintroduce this person if it's undeniable. And you guys been dating for like years. Well, I mean, by the way, it's gonna

be awkward. There's gonna be a really hard conversation. But the best time to do it is when the brother has found himself happy and in love with someone new. So until then, just like do everything but be private. Like just that's the compromise you have to make. You can't bring her to Christmas. You can't bring her to like, you've got to keep it very compartmentalized until it's time to make that call or you guys ultimately don't make it. And then it wasn't worth it. It's better to wait anyway, because if this fizzles out and turns into nothing, you're ruining a family, you know, don't even like, I wouldn't even, it's kind of like what Johnny and I were doing at the beginning of our relationship. It's like, make sure, you know,

it's good for good. Like this is the deal, the real deal. Like he it's only been five months. I don't want to, I don't want to sound like I'm, I'm a hypocrite here because John and I moved very fast and everybody knows that, but we, there was just something in every part of our bodies that knew it was real. He's only been with it for five months, right? Five months at this moment. I would, I would wait a couple of years or make sure that you want, you know, you want to spend the rest of your life with this woman. And by then his brother might have found his new soulmate, you know? Yeah. But then does everybody feel betrayed because they kept it such a secret for so long? Yeah. Yeah. But what's the other option? What's the other option?

Yeah. They get over it. That's sticky. That's a really sticky one. Yeah. That's very sticky. Yeah. Well, you know what? Sometimes things are sticky in a secret Facebook group and sometimes things are a little sticky on national television, Alexis. And you're, not only are you entertaining us with your life, you're actually living your life. So I, you know, I think there's a lot to be said for your strength. And like Becca said, like your authenticity in this situation like you're just like just wait till this week you might not

like me at the end of this episode that's okay that's the thing that's the thing about we're not all always likable no matter who you are it's like if you're showing your real true self like it's messy and when in messy situations sometimes you're not your best self or you're you are forced to be a version of yourself you don't necessarily love all the time but that's why we love the show so much. Exactly. Replay that tonight after you're whenever. I'm so excited. It's like one of the only shows I like run home and watch appointment television for. Cause I have to know, I don't want to go on the internet and hear everyone talking about it. Like I have to watch it live. Um, so Thursday nights on Bravo, Real Housewives of OC, Alexis, you're incredible.

I hope you come back at the end of the season and we can do like a wrap up or something. And I would love to see it. Cause I can't wait to see how the season goes. It's a very long season. I think it's 17 to 20 episodes, which is very awesome, which means, which means there's a lot of baggage to uncover. So I'm excited. I'd definitely love to come back and, and dish with y'all at the end. I love it so much. I'm so happy you're back on our televisions. Congratulations. Congratulations on your love and your cute fashion. Um, have a Malibu rum and diet Pepsi in the lady gang's honor. Thank you for being a fan and we will see you next Tuesday. Thank you so much for listening. the lady gang is produced by steve delameter stacy para jared monaco and social support from

amy ryerson it really means the world to us when you show up in our community outside the podcast so sign up for our secret facebook group just search the lady gang under groups follow us on instagram and tiktok at the lady gang and the most important thing you can do is share this episode with a friend we would love that so much thanks for listening Thank you.