LadyGang - Vanessa Lachey

Episode Date: November 30, 2021

Actress, host and author of "Life from Scratch," Vanessa Lachey is making us all relive the 90’s and reminding everyone that you have the power to write your destiny. "If you want that Nick Lachey, go get em, girl. If you want that job in Hawaii, got get it girl." Plus, in a new game, “The Year of Hott,” Vanessa shares her favorite TRL memories and the fashion trends that may be coming back. Purchase Life from Scratch at Harper Collins Check out our amazing sponsors!!! Rareform: Get your one-of-a-kind bag now at Rareform.com/lady  obé Fitness: Use code LADYGANG to get a WHOLE MONTH FREE at obefitness.com  BetterHelp: Get 10% off your first month of online therapy at BetterHelp.com/ladygang  ZenBusiness: Get your business off the ground for as low as $49 at ZenBusiness.com/lady  Stamps.com: Use code LADYGANG at Stamps.com to get a special offer that includes a 4-week trial PLUS free shipping credits and a digital shipping scale! Everlane: Go to Everlane.com/ladygang and sign up for 10% off your first order plus free shipping AND get easy returns within 30 days of your ship date! Travis Mathew: Find the perfect holiday attire in true TravisMathew style. Visit TravisMathew.com/podcast and use the code "LADY2 0" to get 20% off your first purchase. Chinet: Learn how to spruce up your next gathering at MyChinet.com    Scream For Ice Cream: Sweeten up your sex life by going to screamforicecreamagain.com See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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fund initiatives and menstrual health so each time you buy with lady gang at shop.theladygang.com you're helping give girls in need planet saving period care so when their periods start their education doesn't have to stop plus go to salt.com pages lady gang for your own period care and get 15 off with code lady gang well what is this welcome to the lady gang that's amazing say that again. The Lady Gang. Things are about to change around here. Each week we catch up with Hollywood's hottest girl posse, Kelty Knight, Becca Tobin, and Jack Vanek. Hello, hello, hello. Welcome to The Lady Gang. I am Becca Tobin here with Jack Vanek and Kelty Knight. Hello. We got in trouble last week because I was looking down at my notes during this and well, I got in trouble from our

employee, Alex, she said, she was like, Hey, can you look up? Because it's just like you looking at your notes the whole time. But I'm like looking through all the things that happened, trying to pick the best terrible thing that happened. So I'm put it over here. You can definitely do that before we actually start recording the podcast. I was actually going to ask you during our interview with Chelsea, I know you were probably referring to notes, but it looked like you were texting when she was talking so i was gonna say you should start putting your notes on your computer in front of you oh that's what people do so that you don't look like you're like uninterested in what they're saying interesting i'm going back was i maybe texting with alex about because sometimes

she'll send me notes being like hey don't forget this or the pot the at the pr person is saying like don't ask about that her vagina or like whatever yeah that's a good idea though throw them up right next to your zoom thing yeah i could put it right up and now that i'm in a new room it's like i'm so fresh you're so fresh okay yeah no i don't want i god i hope i didn't piss her off anyway funny story about chelsea um so we had such a good time with her after that we wrote to the rep and i was like i just i've really always wanted her to have a copy of our book she doesn't need a poster or anything I just we tried to get her one like I dm'd her 500,000 times I think from lady gang being like we want to send you a book when the book came out and the

publicist was like she absolutely wants a copy of the book so I sent her a copy of the book last week um in the mail with like a little note from us and then I also sent her 10 tiny joints oh my god amazing oh my god so like this is so nice like she probably gets so many where was this just like from a random goodie bag that you might've gotten? No, it was longer. I mean, I didn't go buy the joints. The joints came to us in like a box. Like I got them given to me,

but they were in the plastic and everything. Wow. There's no way she's going to smoke those. No, I wouldn't. You don't think so? Were there like a label of what they were? Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's a label.

Oh, I wonder if it's the same. It was probably from Nug Club. Like a little baby. Yeah, it's like a little baby roll. just gonna say nug club sent me the best joints yeah those are them no yeah in the little yellow their boxes are insane yeah yeah okay that's good good job kelty well actually this is a really good segue this is a really great segue for my good week bad week so it's time for good week yes it is bad week oh no so we all know kelty makes hasty decisions you know she's a hasty hasty

woman hasty oh no I'm in trouble guys you're not in trouble I you know it's second book time it's second book time and there's there's it's so funny like anytime we have a project the three of us approach every project the same exact way like Jack's style is very very methodical and thought out like takes a lot longer than it should probably because she's very concerned about it being absolutely perfect a perfectionist when it comes to any sort of a creative project i am wait until the very last second and like i give you something that's i know that if i had started sooner it could be better but what i have is this moment and this amount of time. So it's going to be what the best it can be with this amount of time.

And then there's Kelty who will literally block out eight months of her life, go on writing retreats, do the thing, like really throw herself into the work, a creative genius, if you will. And my best friend, Kat Najat Thompson, who edited, helped edit our first book, you know, for grammar errors, for like little things here and there. Cause we get into the moment and it gets tricky and you forget a period or a comma or whatever, whatever punctuation she goes in and she polishes our poops, if you will. So I'm texting with her the other day. And she's like, Hey, when are you going to submit your essays? Cause obviously I'm the last one to the party. And I was like, Oh, I was like, I promise you I'll have these by this time.

I was like how's it going with the other with the other essays like do you feel good about it no and I quote she's gonna kill me for repeating this but I just I had to this does not have to do with any content it has not it is not content it's as from the eyes of an editor you know and she said Jack's essays were perfect Kelty's were a goddamn mess this is crazy wait and this this is after kelty has put all of her shit through grammarly the only that's the only like job of this thing is to fix grammar and spelling mistakes but it's it's not even the problem is is that kelty it's not grammar all the time it's like structural it's yes it's she'll be telling a story and then halfway through the paragraph she's on to another

part of the story, but you, she hasn't told you she's moved on. It's the same way she responds to emails. It's the same way she operates in life. It's very, very, very, very hard to keep her focused. And it is so predictable. Every time is the same. You know how it's going to be. Like my heart is broken because I did go on two writing retreats and my, my process for my essays this time was like, I did them all voice to text. And then I went in and I made them a story. And then I took them again and put them in Grammarly. So like had to fix run on sentences, fixed sentences. Like I thought, honestly, I was like, really, to be honest with everyone, I was patting myself on the back because I was like, I know the last time I got in shit for having like the most

kooky, crazy essays that didn't make sense. And like half of them would just stop like halfway through. And this time I was like, no, I'm going to be so responsible. I'm going to be great. Like I can do this. I got them done super early. Cause I knew you bitches would wait till last minute. I was really patting myself on the back. Like even after I put them through Grammarly, I was like, they barely need any changes. They were great. But let's like, think about how you, you know, you're going on these rider retreats and blah, blah, blah, blah. It's not like you're, you're literally doing that the second that we get the assignment to get it done in the fastest way possible. And then so you don't have to think

about it again. I won't sleep at night. Things like hang over me like a dark cloud. And if I want to be able to have a shower without thinking about what I need to do. Well, this goes into my, I'm just going to, was there more, was there more Becca? Well, that was my, that was my good week. Um, but she also, in your defense, she was like, but it's also just so entertaining. Cause I feel like she listens to the podcast. So she's like, those are voices. She's like, it's like listening to Kelty talk. So it's not that the content is bad. I think you should know the content is wonderful and it's very Kelty. But as far as like from a perspective of an editor, it's a goddamn mess. Okay. Well then I'm glad that I

can admit this to you. So I'm just going to go back for a second to the Chelsea story. so I did send Chelsea um oh no this this book the book and the joints I wasn't going to tell you this part but since now we're talking about I guess they will so I spent all this time making a special card for her on my cricket um that like said thank you you know and it was like cut out on foil like magazine letters cut out individually that's called a ransom note no and then I opened it and I made the mistake that I always do which is I made the card and then I wrote in it and while I was writing in it, I thought I spelled special wrong. So then I wrote mother, I spelled that wrong. And then I wrote it the other way. And then I realized I'd spelled it right. The

first time said mother. And then I just kept going with the notes. So either she's going to think it's funny or she's going to be like, you're so weird. I like that. I don't think that that's that bad. I think if you, you acknowledge your psychopathness there, I think she's not going to read it. I don't think she's going to read it or open the book or smoke the joints, but that's fine. I'll always know that I did my part. Well, you took the time and that's very kind of you. I love that for you. Okay. Becca bad week. My bad week is that I had this mysterious rash on my hands and I talked about taking my own stitches out and blah, blah, blah, blah. Well, I'm, I mean, I may regret having you guys follow me along on this journey, but I got a very concerned call

from my dermatologist and I have to go do a whole workup, like a whole panel because some things were alarming. I don't know. I couldn't really get, here's what's so frustrating is that she called me to tell me about the biopsy, but it's not really like, it's this, it's this, it's this. It was like a, it could be a, this, it could be a, this it's showing markers for this. And it was like four different things. And then, so now I have to go do like a whole blood workup and I know it's going to be nothing. Like, I really know it's going to be nothing but i also just a public service announcement if you're a doctor calling someone to tell them news assume we are all morons also i i had to be like can you please

spell that what are you she said the same thing four times she's like yeah the good and like four times and i was like i bitch i don't know what that means spell that i just don't, they forget we're idiots. I'm like, I am a idiot right now. And I'm going to get off the phone and have no idea what you just told me for 15 minutes. So I am less concerned about this panel that I have to do and more concerned about the fact that I couldn't understand the English language from my dermatologist still don't know what's going on. You know, it's also the bedside manner. It's like when the doctor called me to tell me I had HPV with the way that she delivered the message was like I was dying and I was at the nail salon and she was like I just you know

I have to tell you you have HPV and I'm like but I got this shot I'm like crying in the nail salon because she made it seem like it was the worst diagnosis in the world um in my early 20s yeah I think but you know a little bedside manner would be real nice too yeah just so you're not dying who's up I'll go because mine uh my bad week kind of has to do with the book so I'm bringing it back to the book in regards to you know just the three of us and our situation so while we are all writing our individual essays we also are writing um everything is themed so we're writing like intros outros like things to tie the whole book together like a beginning of the book and a conclusion and everything you know to make it all in a perfect little bow and the other week

Kelty texted me because we have so much going on and she was like good news I wrote the entire book for us all you have to do is just go through it really quickly and we'll be like ready to go and I'm like great okay I'm gonna open this doc and see what's going on it was a goddamn mess and then Kelty's like oh you can just Jack you'll be done by the end of the day right and I'm like there is like 20 pages that I have to go through with a fine tooth comb and make, have to make sense, have to make funny, have to make flow and also relevant to what we're doing. Because the first day I, I wasted my entire day on this section that didn't even exist in the book that Kelty just wrote out. So, you know, that's just, it's what we have to deal with.

one of a kind she's one of a kind good news but i gotta started i gotta started are you okay i just want to let everyone know that i gotta start our next big project i would like to do an experiment okay i would like it won't get done is the answer no it will it'll get done five minutes before it's due what whatever our next big project is for kelty to take the back seat and like see what happens it could be a disaster I mean we won't meet a deadline um it will be it you know it just depends on the project because a lot of projects I do do by myself because they're like straight creative projects and then some projects Kelty is like we should do this thing that takes so long to create but Jack you're the only one that knows

how to do it so dream big help you by starting out I do need to start it's great something nice about me i love i love you so much listen i need and when i was trying to do it myself and finish these little intros and outros i can't do it i need your guidance to start me on my path everyone does everyone does to greatness okay my good week i was just in vegas this weekend for a bachelorette party that's why my voice is extremely hoarse right now um but while i was in vegas we're like at a bar we're having some drinks and there's this girl at the bar and she was like a blonde girl looked around our age and she kept looking at me. So I was like, Oh, I wonder, you know, maybe she's a lady ganger or something. She comes up to me on the way out and she just like stands

like a foot away from my face and is like smiling at me. And I'm like waiting for her to say, Oh my God, I love the lady gang. Or like I loved Warped Tour in like 2009. And she just goes up to me and she goes, you're so hot. And then walks away. And as she's walking away, she goes, I would. oh my god congrats oh my god i was really taking a back and i was with a group of my gorgeous girlfriends like 10 beautiful girlfriends and she just came up to me it was the best moment of my life singled me out i still got relations you just can i ask you what you were wearing during this moment um i was wearing like a, like a sparkly purple crop top pant outfit from Rami Brooke. Yes. I did look good. Not like I do

now. You look great. You're doing great, sweetie. All right. This is a great, uh, segue into my bad week. As you know, uh, I'm going gray in my hair. And, um, if I had vagina, probably my vagina, but I officially I've had gray eyebrows for a long time, but now I have gray nipple hair officially old. The nip got a gray. I didn't realize the nipples were going to go gray. Gray hair. That's better than a black hair.

Yeah. Cause it blends in. I guess you're right. Way to look on the bright side. That is, that's a moment though. What a marker of your age, you know?

and you know what i i think because i don't have a vagina hair like i'm pretty much lasered and then the few that come i wax i'm never gonna know if i get a gray bush and i have no armpit hair so i mean leg hair does never turn gray so this was really the only marker that could be like i mean i have so much gray hair now that i'm like aggressively like plucking it out when i point my when i cut my hair like if it comes anywhere on the part and i can see it it gets plucked like so anyway, um, you probably shouldn't pluck out every gray that you have. Sometimes that is going to get overwhelming on the rest of your hairs. Well, at some point I'm going to have to do the, I dye my gray hair color, but I really don't want to get into that. Like I'm trying to

like the last leaves, but, or blonde right up to the root. I don't know what the answer is. Tell me, please, everyone in what you do. Tell me everyone. It's so expensive in LA to get your hair done. And, and I feel like, like I'm going to have to go every four weeks and sit there with the hair thing on? Like, can I just do it myself? Anyway, I'm going to be that lady. That's like spraying it like my mom and you're the old ladies that end up with like blue eyebrows. Cause they're just like, I've got this. Well, and then you start losing your eyesight. So then like, you really don't know what you're doing. God, I constantly think about losing my eyesight. Cause there's so many things I catch on my face that I'm like, Oh, a rogue hair or nose hairs that start sprouting

or like all the things I'm so worried about losing my eyesight. You need that. I will always take care of you, Becca. Thank you. I will never allow you to have a nose hair, but okay. My good week before we get into our interview with Vanessa is, um, I got a new word for the lady gang dictionary, which I know is sometimes people are like, please don't use this as your good week, but it's so good. One of our lady gangers DM me and said, I have a new word. It's a vagina when you're wait that's an amazing my vagina absolutely has a vagina it's a bujo for its own plans of like hey you've just touched air lately i'm gonna give you a yeast infection you ate a chocolate bar you have a uti like i my vagina has a vagina of its own oh that's a great word i don't know how

we haven't come up with that before vagina that's like my butthole it has its own agenda a vagina vagina mine does when i take a laxative you know just never know well that is not a mind of its own that is being forced to forced like whatever that's true excavate um anyway we're so excited about the episode today and uh enjoy vagina we'll be right back so this time of year can be really challenging for people i know that i've been in a position before where everyone's cheery and i'm feeling a little crummy and that is okay but what i want to tell you is our sponsor better help is there to help you so if you're struggling with grief relationships or stress or having trouble sleeping meeting goals online therapy might be good for you so better help is

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Today's episode is brought to you by stamps.com. So I'm sure you know that we just launched our brand new holiday collection full of all of the best clothes for the holiday season and we are using stamps.com to ship everything out because we've been using stamps.com for years now so stamps.com takes all the hassle and guesswork out of holiday shipping and it saves you money you can easily compare prices and delivery rates across major carriers and get huge discounts i'm talking up to 40 off usps and 76 off ups rates and whether your sales come from amazon etsy shopify or ebay stamps.com

streamlines your shipping so deliver more smiles this holiday and start shipping and saving with stamps.com today there's no risk and with our promo code lady gang you can get a special offer that includes a four-week trial plus free shipping credits and a digital shipping scale no long-term commitments or contracts you'll be up and running in minutes just go to stamps.com click on the microphone at the top of the home page and type in code lady gang that's stamps.com promo code lady gang stamps.com easy e-commerce shipping for less a lot less now back to the lady gang our guest today is a quadruple ruple threat starting her career as miss teen usa in 1998 or 1998 yeah 1998 landing the coveted gig on entertainment tonight and eventually being the

girl we all wanted to be hobnobbing with every single y2k artist as the host of trl she's acted on 30 Rock's Psych, The Bold and the Beautiful, and so many more. She crushed the floor on Dancing with the Stars. And now she's got the big job, everybody. The first ever female lead for an NCIS franchise for NCIS Hawaii. And she's got a brand new book. No big deal. When good things come, they come all at once. It's not overwhelming. Life from Scratch, family traditions that start with you. We know you love to read Lady Gang. The book includes recipes, parenting tips, birthday and date night ideas, and personal stories. She is absolutely stunning. And she gets to have sex with nick lachey and she gets to have sex with nick lachey in hawaii right now everybody she's

the luckiest human alive please welcome to the lady gang vanessa lachey thank you for that intro did you breathe wow it's really the best part about it was when you read 1998 and you thought it was a typo yeah you're like wait that was so long ago you're like oh no that's right i was like oh wow you were you were winning this team usa and i was in uh joseph and the amazing technicolor dream code at beth facey high school so you know it's like the same i'm the old lady wait how do we don't talk about our ages do we no you have for 40 right 40 i'm about to be 40 january okay and you guys not for youngs 34 i'm like how old am i it all just goes to a blur when you're in your thirties, I feel like. Yeah, it does. It does. So we're so excited to have you

here. I want to talk about the new gig, but first I want to talk about interesting fact that I found out for all the listeners that I don't think you got enough credit for in your career. When you won Miss Teen USA, you won Miss Congeniality, Miss Teen USA, and Swimsuit, the highest mark ever in the history awarded for a hottie body. Holy cow. I, I, you, I, you're my new best friend. Whenever I'm down or whenever I'm sad, I want to call you up to make me feel good. Thank you. Yes. You're my hype man. You're my hype gal. I don't expect the winner to also win Miss Kijidiality. Like I watched enough drag race to know that that never happens, but then to also the bikini bitch one, Miss Congeniality two. Okay. I believe there's a science to this, if I may.

So I'd never done a pageant before in my life. I did miss South Carolina Teen USA as a dare. I was working at a state farm insurance office. This girl came in gorgeous, beautiful. And my boss ended up giving her money to enroll in the state pageant. And I was like, why did you just give her money? He said, well, her grandfather's had a policy with us for decades. And for me, it's a tax write-off. And I was like, oh, so then I went home and took the flyer that I had already taken out of YM magazine years prior that I kept in my nightstand because every girl dreams of being, you know, Miss Teen USA or even on like we watched these pageants growing up. Right. Oh yeah. And so I call, I, I called the number. It was an 800 number and I

gave them my address and they sent me a South Carolina registration packet and it was a thousand dollars. I don't have a thousand dollars. I was 17. And so I asked my dad and he was like, we are a middle-class family. I'm sorry. That's not happening. So then my boss who gave the money said, did you ever look into that? You should do it. And I said, I did. And it's a thousand dollars. Thank you. But sorry. Yeah. Within 24 hours, this man had 10 of his friends donate a hundred bucks that they all, he handed me a check for a thousand dollars and said, you have no excuses do this. I support you. I believe in you. I was like, get out of town. So I signed up, got it. And it gives you a checklist. You need a swimsuit, but it's a

specific swimsuit. It's like a dry, clean, only swimsuit. I can't get wet heels that, you know, there's a skin tone that has to match your tone, the evening gown, which my dad was like, all right, this dress is going to be your prom dress, your miss South Carolina, teen dress, your wedding dress. It's all of the above and an interview outfit. So I think we went to like, I don't even know. It was probably like Burlington Coke factory. It was mortified. Right. But I didn't know any better. And so I went to state and I ended up winning and making this a long story short, which is very rarely that Nick hates when I say that. Cause I don't make any of my stories short, but it's in Miss teen USA and it's like casual. And I'm like, Oh great. To me, casual

was a Notre Dame sweatshirt and you know, jean shorts and sneakers. No, no, no. Casual meant not evening gown already. I show up and they're like this chick, you know what I mean? I think they actually felt bad for me. Maybe I didn't know what I was doing. I decided to make the best of a bad situation. I mean, I, I remember getting there and crying going, what have I done? I am way out of my league. And cause I won miss South Carolina teen USA on a whim. And I'm like, what's next? They're like, you go to teen USA. It's on TV. I'm like, Holy shit. Yeah. So, so I just had fun. And my roommate was Louisiana at the time and it was in her home city and I would see her family on the weekends. I'm like, I'm going to make the most of it. I did impressions. My favorite was

fire Marshall bill. Oh yeah. Jim Carrey through and through where is the state farm guy? Well, he he's of course he supported me he was my boyfriend's dad at the time that's so sweet and so yeah so i just went to have fun and and you vote for congeniality before the live telecast so they would have not if they knew you were going to beat them they would no no they didn't realize but that's the thing it wasn't i didn't have the best body but i was also 17 so when i talked to the judges later who are regular everyday television personalities and celebrities they're like you just looked and acted 17 you know I just I had I didn't have a six-pack not that all of the

girls did but I didn't know how to walk I didn't I just was me and I guess to them it was it was just a confidence thing and so um so all of the things that were my insecurities ended up working in my favor and life changed from then. Now you have a six pack because you're like blowing stuff up and running. And so my, I was so excited when this got announced. So NCIS is the most popular franchise on television. Everybody knows that everyone watches it. Um, so there's a new franchise in Hawaii. And what was so cool is obviously we were so happy when we, when we saw this announced, but then the video of you on your Instagram, if you haven't watched it, everyone, there's a video of Vanessa and she took it in the car, um, her son's in the baby seat and she gets the news

that she's gotten this gig and she's, it's so genuine. And I will just say before I want to hear you speak on this, like, I just look at your life and I'm like, how could anything ever be wrong on, like, how could she ever struggle? Like you've had all the cool jobs. You've got a cool husband, you've got a beautiful family. You're so gorgeous. It's like, you would never want for anything. And then seeing this video of you, I was like, Oh, you know what? Just like the rest of us hustling and waiting for the gig. And it was very authentic. Thank you. I think it was a massive release. Um, we had just come out of coat. Well, what I thought was us coming out of COVID because it was March, 2021. And my two older kids were back in school with masks six feet apart from

their other classmates. And my husband had just gone to Vegas to rerecord. They didn't know what under the Notre Dame sweatshirt, a new, um, remix album. And so I was alone with my son and I had just done another show. We held on for an entire year. It was a sitcom with Oliver Hudson. I was this is the one a year, a year of my life for that show. And March 31st, they said, it's not going to go. And I'm like, what, what am I doing? What am I doing? I am a 40 year old woman with three kids and i auditioned march 2021 it took me a year to shoot this show and then it's a no and then that whole year what am i doing with my life what am i doing that matters what am i it just it was all of this like what who am i kind of thing and when this opportunity came up it all

happened so quick but i looked at this role and i was like this i'm her i can be her i believe in her she's a badass with a warm heart she's a mother she fights for her country but also believes in her family. She can do it all and doesn't take no for an answer. She's kicking ass in a male dominated profession. I was like, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. I am her, but then I just needed them to believe in me being her. And at this time coming out of, like I said, the, the, no, the job that didn't go and, and a year of homeschooling my children questioning if I'm even a smart human being, I got this call. And the reason I pulled the video out wasn't, it was never intended for this. It was intended to, Nick wasn't with me. So at first I wanted, usually your husband,

he's always been there and he's like there with me and he wasn't there. And then I wanted to let the casting director know, because she was with me on this journey, how much she meant to me. And that's why I was saying, thank you. And then it just, I realized my son's in the car and I realized, holy shit, I got the job. It just, all of it was coming out. And, and yeah, it was super raw. And so when, when the show premiered, they were like, do we do this clip, this clip, this clip. And I told my girl who does my social media with me, I said, did you ever see the video when I got the job? And she was like, no. And I sent it to her and she was like, oh my God, V, you have to do this. And I remember thinking it was super vulnerable and super raw, but super real. And I

really wanted people to see that and let them see that. Yes, we all, we all cry when we're sad or happy. We laugh when things are great. We put our pants on one leg at a time. And if you work hard and hustle and are good to people things will hopefully turn in your favor this is such a it's such a big deal um okay so are you living in hawaii now full-time yes did the whole did you sell that beautiful house and everything not yet i need we once we knock on wood if and when we get our season two pickup you know i don't want to put the cart before the horse so um that's when if we get season two and then i know that three four five six seventy nine ten are not guaranteed But statistically speaking, if a CBS drama goes two years or two seasons, it's most likely going to go.

So once that happens, then we'll sell and move. Right now, we're just renting a beautiful condo in Hawaii that has all of the amenities we need. It has a pool. It has a park. There's, you know, a doorman to take deliveries. And he's there to make sure everyone's okay when, like, if I'm not there, then I know that there's security with the kids and vice versa. So when Nick's at home, he knows I'm safe, but season two, then we'll, we'll be full on decision.

Yeah. Wow. Oh, yes. I just think, is this like a real life music video? I'm like, I just see you guys. It's the weekend. The kids have a babysitter. You guys are like in the waterfall going for a hike, right?

That's what it's like. Not, it's a lot of, it's, it's not. maybe one day but right now it's a lot of we just got our dogs out there so it's a it's a small condo with the three kids the two dogs and you know nick left everything to come out there and he's with the kids all day and i'm on set for anywhere from 10 to 15 hours a day and um but we're not complaining but it's definitely not music video yet we'll get there but for now it's just like, it's adjusting and taking it all in and taking it day by day. Life from scratch. I really thought this was a really interesting topic for you because you've opened up in the past about

like that you didn't have a great relationship with your mom and, and that entire situation. And so, and then you've built this like incredible family, like lust worthy family, where I'm like, if you're going to have a family, you should be the Lachey's. Um, how, how was it to like, kind of ride over those emotions and then get it out in a book? Well, it's not that I didn't have a good relationship with my mother, my relationship with my mother was non-existent. And if you get the book, you can get the whole story, but she left when I was little. And so I've, to your point, like stumbled along the way. And I just kind of eventually picked myself up and said, am I going to look at life as a glass half empty? Or am I going to look at life as glass half full? And

no, she's not here to tell me, you know, how to date guys and how to cook the family recipe or give me jewelry or give me dating advice or motherly advice or wedding, any advice. She's just not here. And I decided I wanted to change that and to use a term, break the cycle for my kids and my relationship with my husband and my family and my future. I think the point of the book is that your messy past doesn't have to define your future. And, and messy is a very loose term. It can be interpreted in everyone's different ways. People still have their mom in their life and they have a messy relationship. I mean, amen to that. You know, it's like, I love you, mom. And they hang up and they're like, everyone is struggling to find their own

identity. So I think the beauty that I finally come to grips with is that you have the power to write your own destiny. And if you want that guy, if you want that Nick Lachey, go get them, girl. If you want the job in Hawaii, go get it, girl. If you want three kids, go make them with Nick Lachey, girl. I wish it was that easy for the rest of us. We're all trying to find our Nick Lachey. It's there. And I believe in working really hard to get it. And I have. And I think the whole point of the book is that I want people to see that they can control their destiny and hope that the book inspires them to not see the glass, like I said, half empty. like i wore a white dress to a wedding did not know you're not supposed to as a guest

yes not because nobody told me anymore nobody told me nobody told me and i came home and it was back in the day of cameras and i got the photos printed showed my girlfriend and she was like you wore this to the wedding i was like yeah this is me we're on the rock and it was in puerto rico she's like you know you don't wear white to a wedding it's like a big f you to the bride and i I was like, what? And she goes, yeah. And honestly, I started putting the pieces together and her family was like rude to me. And bride was so kind. She's like, I don't care. I know your background. I know where you're coming from, Vanessa. She's like, but my mom wasn't happy about it. And I'm like, I was mortified. Oh my God. And you're so beautiful. Like, I don't even want

you at my wedding. I don't even want you in the photos. I don't even want you with a bag over your head at my wedding. The bread was probably, or the mom was probably like, what is the beef between you two? Not looking back now. I was more and then to make it worse. All right. This is a detail I didn't say in the book. It was remember how J crew has started that like bridal, the bridesmaid. Okay. It was right when that was fresh. So I was like, these are perfect wedding dresses. So I got the white, it was a strapless to the knee. Her bridesmaids were in the blush strapless we had the same dress oh no I had the white one they had the blush one what and I just thought I had good taste I was like oh my gosh she loved it so much she picked it for her bride

oh my god it's a messy life it's a messy life miss lachey speaking of outfits um there is there's an important era of your life where we all looked up to you which was trl and the outfits I went back to like, look at some of these memorable moments to prepare for this. The, the gene was so low. The zipper. You needed a bikini wax for those jeans. The zipper didn't even zip. I think you just put it on and you just flapped it.

You flapped the zipper down. So it locked to what? I don't know. Yes. Do you have, I know that you always post it's Tuesdays, TRL Tuesdays or Thursdays. I can't remember. Okay. You always post all these memories and it's incredible because for, for me and my age

group like this is like our life like i feel young again when i see you with like baby bow wow and now he's like adult bow wow and rome bow wow or whatever i was with the jonas brothers and nick jonas oh my gosh girl you have to look up jonas brothers on trl with vanessa manillo and he's like 12 and i he's like hey it was there's been a campfire and like it came from like camp rock it was and now he's like nick jones like sexual and i'm the old cougar lady who's like remember me do you have like a favorite like the memory that you tell around dinner tables about that time honestly there were so many that's probably the hardest question to answer literally like think if you think about it and i forget some of the people i even look through like the

images i'm like oh my gosh i forgot oh my gosh you just there's so much that happened every single day was two or three or four guests celebrities actors musicians athletes it was crazy it was definitely one of the best times in my entire life a highlight of my career for sure next to this one I wish I would bring it back wait did they bring it back they tried to it didn't work you know what they didn't have you hey I'll take it no it's a streaming world you don't want to see videos anymore it was just so iconic for all of our youths it was really really special and then my last question before we go into our game is nick is still so hot vanessa like you're like you're very hot and i mean you're a beautiful you're an ever hot like you're an ever

hot where you're just gonna be hot forever but sometimes the men are not especially i feel like men from that era like you see the downfall pretty fast there I'm not gonna say that I Jack Vanek and I have a thing for AJ from the Backstreet Boys and we went down like a very six month long obsession and we're over we've come through the other side but now some of those boys they've gotten together and they're doing like old man like different people from different groups are doing like a review together and I'm like this was not if you're going to do this review it's your mic feels the same way literally was like my vagina is dry all of a sudden like ah but so anyway nick is is still so cute and he's just truly one of the nicest

people so i'm going to put you on the spot if nick didn't exist and you had to like fall in love with another boy bander boy bander yeah like from like one of the eras i mean you can do o-town back street and saying like who's next in line we'll never tell nick you said this does it have to be a boy bander maybe not is it jonathan taylor thomas like someone like someone who was in the class with them that also was in that era yeah era we joke like i have my you know whatever and there was a moment he's married now and got and i love them together but um it was it's ryan reynolds like i just think he's so charming he's like he's like an action star but he's so self-deprecating and he's so funny and he's so all of the things and there was a moment there when he when he split

up with um Alanis and before Blake he was single but that's when I met Nick actually this is a funny story I've been married for 10 years with him for 15 so it's fine but Ryan has always been my like I just think he hung the sun moon and stars and and he was single or you know at the time. And then he got engaged to a lot of, so I was like, okay, in my mind, he's off the market. Right. I just, I respect that. I believe in that. Nick was in a previous relationship. He was taken. So even though I loved the guy and thought he hung the sun, moon and stars, I was like, he's married. Like he's don't mess with that bad karma girl. Like do not mess with him. So then Nick ended up splitting up and him and I started talking and we talked loosely for a few months.

And finally, I'll never forget. I came into TRL and I told my hair and makeup girls, I was like, nick and i made it official we're boyfriend girlfriend whatever that meant at the time it was like we're going to be monogamous we're boyfriend girlfriend whatever right my hair girl goes maybe this isn't the time i should tell you ryan reynolds and alanis called off their engagement oh my god you couldn't tell me this yesterday not that it would have changed anything oh i remember that day vividly because it was the day we decided to be a monogamous couple in a relationship, working towards a boyfriend,

girlfriend was also the day that they decided to break off. It's your first test, you know, and you passed. Oh God, I'm crying. That is so now I can, I, I, I joke with him and I'm like, Ryan Reynolds, Ryan Reynolds, but you're right. That was my first test. And I, I didn't take the bait. No, you weren't a trifling hell. congrats can we add that to my intro and also not a trifling hell yes yes all right when we come back a game for all of us well for you three to play and we'll see who's gonna win all right we're about to speak my love language and you know what that is obey so we're coming up on that time of year and you're probably a big ball of stress your motivation is mia and you're not really

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so you just buzz in if you know the answer okay i need lots of energy and jack you're gonna know all the answers i know you will here we go number one what fashion accessory that you loved was invented by a high school shop teacher shop teacher the scrunchie belly button scrunchie I was going to say the belly chain choker. I'll give you any flat. That was the nineties. The slap band wrist. And what happened to those? They're back now. They're back. They're back now. Throw them in their gift bags. They love them and they hit each other with them. It's fantastic. Yes. A weapon. Love it. What was the federal minimum wage for most of the nineties?

oh my gosh three four dollars 650 becca was getting an extra amount from her dad 651 vanessa takes it 425 425 wow i remember working at the chicken place deep frying the chicken and my salary is four dollars and 14 cents canadian yeah i was taking it steak and sorry not steak and ale steak and shake not steak and shake that would have been awesome steak and ale steak and ale oh if he said nail and i was like that's gross come in and get get a sirloin have a sirloin into the wall okay what was the first rap song to hit number one on the billboard hot 100 come on trl california

nope jack becca was it rap song i wouldn't know was it a mace it takes two it's very cold oh vanilla ice ice baby yes oh what a that's a rap song so i guess so that's a reach that's a strong reach but it was the billboard hot 100 they didn't even know at that time wow okay he got sued poor guy all right because the song is a queen like do you remember this it was like i'm digressing here no they did the cover and he was like no queen said this was the rights to their song under pressure because they go i had the extra note it's different i just made him a surfer guy i don't know why but they ended up being able to get the rights that i think they got all the royalties and he i mean it's houses on hgtv now

it is the same exact melody so if you hear the song um second under pressure at the beginning you're like oh this is and then it's under pressure and it's not him it's them poor vanilla vanilla mr ice wanted to make houses anyways not sing in what year was the world wide web first introduced. 1991. I'm shocked. She is beauty. Grace, she is brains.

1991. Isn't that crazy, you guys? It didn't even exist. We're sold. Okay. What, this is for you, Jack. What are the bucket hats of the 90s called in Australia? Oh.

it's on the tip of my tongue i don't know what is it that's your clue is it a giggle giggle hats oh my god vanessa you're too good i would have never gotten that not a million years okay very last question what stuffed animal fad debuted in 1993 no no yeah no it's true does anyone have anyone in their lives that made like a lot of money off beanie babies because you remember you were like i should keep them and you kept them in the plastic with the thing oh mine are definitely still up in my attic and never getting rid of them but i feel like that babies no it was right it was beanie babies yeah it's beanie babies yeah yeah they made a comeback now guys

are they cool again slap but is it weird to have children and see all of your toys remade and all your cartoons remade yes and no it's like oh I know this and then I'm like oh man I'm the old lady when we did it they didn't have this guy I'm not 15 miles down how old are your kids four six nine okay so they're not in high school yet does nine know you're cool yet yeah he's starting to know like nick won mass singer and that did a lot for like the cool parent factor and i was like how do you top that and i was like well i'll get us to jab and move us to hawaii no i'm kidding with my husband um he knows we're on tv and if i'm being completely honest i'm really glad we got out of la when we did because he was getting to this point it's he went to a great school and

had some great friends but the word famous was brought up a lot are you famous i'm like what where is this coming from i'm mom and in hawaii they don't care like they won't it it's such a multicultural melting pot of just island life and love and ohana they don't care and we needed that now because you know Nick's got a show I've got a show and my kids need to see me as mom and dad not as the badass NCIS agent with a gun in her they don't need to pass your billboard on sunset they just need to know it's there exactly now their friends are going to be like damn it his parents were famous no you know his mom I won't say who for the privacy of this kid but there's a very famous kid who's famous now and randomly is in my son's class and i was like yes i'm not like

he's there so everyone's like oh so and so they don't care about jay so why because this kid is there and i feel bad because the kid obviously just wants a normal life probably went to oahu for that but um but yeah it's uh good for you i'm happily over there which is great perfect well I mean we didn't even get into like the love is blind like we have there's so much more yeah I mean you're very very busy but Vanessa we can follow Vanessa love is blind season two I cannot February did you guys already film it we did oh my gosh what city is it season two is Chicago I just can't wait I think that is the best show ever and the track rate is so good it's like it's great and uh better than the bachelor of like all of the 25 seasons so

and they stay together somebody talks earlier in my interviews they're like they're together longer than the people on the bachelor so it just proof in the pudding that you can fall in love for someone for who they are on the inside i love it so much i cannot wait says miss congeniality swimsuit winner miss teen usa and not a trifling hoe dress to her friend's wedding well we are all good and bad inside you know what i mean we're all lovable and hateable um vanessa you can follow her at vanessa lachey ncs hawaii is on monday nights at 10 p.m on cbs we're so happy for you um let us know when nick's available next time to come on and just like purr at us and um we're so happy for you and i'm glad we finally got a chance to do this we've been

working on it for a long time so i'm so happy you took time out of your busy press for a little less so we will see you next tuesday thanks for listening the lady gang is produced by alex ingber steve delameter and jared monaco make sure you subscribe rate and review our podcast and if you love it share it with your friends on social media like oh my god i just listened lady gang this episode's are great swipe up to listen and if you really want to which we know you do please follow us on social at kelty at becca at jack vanek and at the lady gang sign up for our newsletter at the lady gang.com and join our secret facebook group it's super fun see you next tuesday i am lola blanc host of trust me cults extreme belief and the abuse of power right here on

podcast one do you think someone in your life is a narcissist find out on our recent episode with dr romany dervasala every narcissistic relationship is a two-person cult all the grooming characteristics. Everything that happens to a member of a cult is exactly what happens to somebody who gets into and gets stuck in a narcissistic relationship. Get new episodes of Trust Me every Wednesday on Podcast One, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.