Language of Love with Dr. Laura Berman - How to Ground Yourself When The World Around You Seems Crazy with Christina Lopes

Episode Date: January 11, 2023

It can seem like the world is going a little crazy these days. Everything is in an upheaval around the world, and in our personal lives.   Christina Lopes, the author of Walking With the Masters and spiritual healer, is chatting with me during this week’s Language of Love Conversation to discuss her wild ride through a spiritual awakening. Christina shares much of the wisdom she gained in her journey including how to ground yourself during times of chaos.     During our Conversation, Christina and I dive into: The divorce crisis and out of body experience that began her spiritual awakeningHow our tendency to keep busy negatively affects our sense of equilibrium  Christina’s Kundalini awakening (along with what the hell that means), and the rising of what she experiences as a Dynamic Feminine Force of Consciousness  The limitations of the Western medical system to explain so many of the physical experiences that come with spiritual awakening The powerful thing that happens when you actually ask your spirit guides for help The importance of protecting your energy and finding play Visit Christina Lopes’ website to learn more about her journey, spiritual awakening, and healing. You can also watch her videos and read her wonderful new book Walking With the Masters!  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hey, I'm sex, love, and relationship therapist, Dr. Laura Berman. And for the past 30 years, I've been helping people just like you learn to love and be loved better. Here on the Language of Love Conversations, I'm talking to some of the world's most influential and revolutionary experts, thought leaders, spiritual teachers, and celebrities about love, sex, and relationships from a mind, body, and spirit perspective. and that way my goal is to awaken your mind body and soul it's time to become fluent in the language of love christina lopes she's come on the show before i am such a fangirl she was trained as a

physical therapist but really is a spiritual teacher a spiritual master an energy healer a channel and really one of the most beautiful voices, in my opinion, of our times around awakening and how to move through awakening. I interviewed her at first for my ebook, You're Not Crazy, You're Just Ascending. Hopefully you've read that. You can get it on my website at drlauraberman.com. But this episode, I'm talking with Christina really about her new book called Walking with the Masters, a story of surrender, love, and trust in the guidance of the universe. And it is an autobiographical story of Christina's own journey, surrendering her identity, her intellectual or her clinician-driven self, and offering that up,

opening up to the loving energy that's available to all of us and the transformation that that took her through, how she accessed her guidance, how she accessed faith, and how she began to manifest the life of her dreams. So I am so excited to share Christina with you on this episode of The Language of Love. So let's dive in to Walking with the Masters, your new book. I was so excited to read it. I have so many questions for you. how is the book doing? Are you getting a good response? I haven't actually been following following sales very much. I just I like to I like to kind of release these things to the universe and just let it reach whoever it needs to reach. But I've been getting really,

really good feedback from the people that we launched it in our live events in Miami last month. And so been getting great feedback from people who've already read it, who had actually a hard copy of it. And so I've been getting great feedback. So I'm really excited. And I hope that people, you know, I hope people enjoy the story. It's very different from the first book. It's a little bit lighter. It goes, you know, it's the second book really takes me into the more woo-woo aspect of my spiritual awakening. And really when I just went into that hermit mode and, and so it's very different energy from the first one, but a lot of amazing things happened. And a lot of things that happened to me in that book are happening to so many people around the world

right now. Yes. And so, you know, I hope that this book just reaches people, the people that need to read it and kind of brings them hope and a little bit of just a guiding hand to help them out through all the struggles that they're going through right now. Yeah. And I've interviewed you as part of my own research for my ebook, You're Not Crazy, You're Just Descending is the title of the book because I had been following you for some time. That's how I came across you in the first place was in my own search for support as I was going through my own ascension on a new level, like kind of on steroids. I call it my triple reawakening because as you describe in this book and in other things I've seen you, you were definitely awake as a kid too. And then you

shut it down like I did. Right. And so I had no, I did that too. I had an awakening in around 2010 or 11, but then it kind of evened out. And then obviously in the past couple of years, I've had a re-reawakening, but I've, I noticed that there was this sort of collection of experiences that everyone seems to be having, right. With this Ascension and you were so gracious and wonderful and sharing your wisdom. And a lot of that wisdom comes through in this story, this sneaky autobiography, because you kind of call it fiction, but it ain't fiction. Yeah. And it started through your own AFGE that you just allude to, you know, another fucking growth experience is what I call these big things that like break you open. I love that. I was

going to ask you what that acronym was. But it was this, it was your divorce, right? You'd gotten divorced and you were really reeling from that. And then that kind of, as these things tend to do, broke you open, broke you down. And it was really then it seems at least from where we pick up in this book that you had really begun this spiritual reawakening, the story of which is told in this book, Walking with the Masters. The initial, the first book kind of tells the initial awakening, the story of the initial awakening, the first year of my awakening. And it really did start, It started with the dissolution of my marriage. And I remember there was a mantra, an intention that I set out.

Like when my life just fell completely apart, I was like, it fell apart very suddenly. And I was just like, wait a minute, you know, like I've been building this life I was supposed to be living and technically looking from the outside in, I supposedly have this amazing life. And yet all of this just falls apart on me. And there was this internal realization that I was going on a different path. Very early on, I knew that this was setting me on my path. And so I remember setting that mantra. I was lying in bed one night and I was just staring at the ceiling and my dog was lying next to me and I was in complete darkness. And at the time, my ex-wife, she was a consultant. So when we separated, I stayed in the house for a couple of months and she would just travel more and just stay out. So I would be alone in the house, thankfully. And I just remember I was alone one night, I was just staring up in the ceiling. And I just said, you know, clearly, my life hasn't worked out how it was supposed to. And so just I'm just ready for to be shown what I need to see. And at the time, I had a really, really strong connection. I come from a Catholic upbringing, and I had a really strong connection with Master Yeshua or people called Jesus.

And so he was the first spirit guide that I contacted with in that moment. And I just said directly to him, I said, I have no idea what you want me to do, but please show me. And it was like, I just had an immediate out of body experience. And that's kind of what started and set me, you know, going. And that was the first spirit guide that I connected with. And then I can, you know, the second book then tells the story of all the other characters. yeah they're amazing characters well what I love about you know just unpacking a little bit about what you just said right is that and I've often said this that the universe spirit god you know whatever you want to call it holy oneness is sort of my my name for it it's kind of scratch you know you're not you're on a path but it's not the path your soul really intends right of your greatest highest purpose of what your essential self your soul self really wants and so you get this little it's like you know your path is maybe set by your ego or your wounds or something else like we all tend to do and it's like the universe will just sort of scratch at the door like hello this isn't

really working hello and then like you don't listen right because you know that's you don't want to listen and then it knocks a little harder and then it starts pounding and you're still not freaking listening so it kicks down blows down and explodes the whole house and that is for sure for sure what happened to me. Oh yeah. That's what happened is that you were just like, you weren't listening to the scratches, the knocks and the kicks on the door. So yeah. And, and, and, you know, a lot of times, like I've worked with so many people and we all come to our awakenings in different ways. And for a lot of us, especially for the people that I work for the segment of the population that I work, I work with people who come from a lot of trauma.

And so they have very similar paths to mine. And so sometimes it's not really like for me, when I look back, was it a question of me not listening? I don't know if it was just me not listening. But now my interpretation is maybe a little bit different. It was me covered with just so many blockages and so much wounding. And I had no idea where to start. And I remember that even even though the the breakup of my marriage was pretty sudden I remember in the months prior to that happening that there was just something inside of me like I knew something was wrong and I knew That I wasn't happy. I knew that I felt dead inside And it was so confusing to me because at that moment I had no idea where to start and so many people go through this like where do you start? Where do you start? Right. And that's a very compact, that's a much more compassionate way. Cause by saying that you

didn't listen, right. Is not to say that you could have, or had the wherewithal or the internal resources to listen. So I appreciate you making that distinction. Cause you're right. When we don't listen, it's not like we have any sense, not even where to start, but it's also so petrifying. There is a kind of ostrich element to it that isn't because we suck and we refuse to see it's that that's part of our programming. Yeah, absolutely. I think that's a really, really, so where do you, well, we're going to get it. I want to ask you where you start, right? Because in many ways, the story as you tell it is about your continued awakening, right? Your first book was about the initial awakening, but this is as you started to

really essentially become a hermit, right? And it's sort of what, in many ways, I was seeing the parallels between what you just went through in your life and what we collectively have gone through with the pandemic, right? That as you can't go, in your case, you just needed to, and life just set itself up as it will do to support you and just like being totally alone and going inward. And that's in many ways what COVID did to all of us, right? When we could no longer go out in the world and in our distractions and on our hamster wheels, we were forced to go inward. And we all kind of had this forced isolation on us that you voluntarily kind of did many years. Well, I think, but I think, I think for me, it was a little easier, I would say,

because the people that have reached me during COVID and after COVID, COVID was extremely painful because at least I, you know, I went to the forest, I was by myself, I was going through a really difficult, you know, healer's journey is a healer's awakening. It's a specific type of subset of a spiritual awakening that a lot of healers go through in preparation for their healing mission. Not everyone has to go through the same type of awakening, but you know, for the people that I've connected who've, who've kind of awakened during COVID, it was really painful because a lot of them were, they weren't just stuck at home. They were stuck at home with partners where they were really unhappy with. Yes. They were stuck in situations where like

they were working from home and now suddenly now they're working more than they were working before they went to actual physical work. And so now they're overworked and yet they're home. So this is very confusing and very stressful. So there was a lot. Yeah, there was a lot going on that fortunately I didn't have to go through. So I have so much compassion for people that are going through spiritual awakenings right now where they have to maintain a job and pay the bills and where they're dealing with relationship issues, then they're still with a partner while they're going through a spiritual awakening. I feel like for me, it was easier because my spiritual awakening started with the breakup of a relationship. So that made it easier or cleaner. Yeah, yeah, yeah,

yeah. So what do you recommend if someone is in that situation? I mean, obviously, this is a big question, and we're going to be unpacking your journey a little bit. But if someone is listening, and they're like, Oh, yeah, that's happening to me. I'm questioning everything. I'm having these ascension symptoms. I'm feeling that dis-ease, that breaking open and breaking down of things. What do you say to people to help support them in starting this journey or even maintaining it? I'm preparing, actually, as we're talking right now, today was a day that I was preparing a script for a really difficult video that I'm going to be shooting for YouTube and it's on suicide. And it was kind of in response to Twitch's suicide and how it affected

me. And it's really interesting because the way I would have answered your question maybe a week ago or a month ago, or even the last time I was here, I think we talked about it a little bit. And if you go back and see the answer I gave you, it's not going to be the same one I'm going to give you today. And it's precisely because in the past I would have said to people, and this is still valid for a lot of people, that it is absolutely essential for you to tap into what you're feeling. Period. End of sentence. There's no way around this. And what we end up doing is we run away from our emotional state a lot. I used to do this. So many of us do this. So I'm going to go shopping. I'm going to go out with my friends. I'm going to go have a drink.

I'm going to go do this. I'm going to go travel. I'm going to be busy, busy, busy, busy, busy. If you find yourself in that situation where you literally cannot have a minute of your life without doing something, right away you know that something is wrong. Something is wrong in the sense that you're having difficulty just sitting with yourself. Why? Why is the downtime difficult? And then people will say, because all these things inside of me and I have no idea what to do with all these things. And so what I would have said in the past was just give yourself a little bit of time. I don't care if you have three kids or if you have a husband or if you have, it doesn't matter. You're just going to schedule a little bit of time in your day for you because you deserve

it. And you're in that little time, you're going to find yourself a bubble and you're just going to start writing down what you feel. Just write down what you feel. I remember I did this exercise initially with the help of a psychotherapist. I went to see a psychotherapist right after my awakening, right after the initial awakening. And that psychotherapist was really important for me in that sense. And he really helped me unpack my initial emotions. And I remember getting home one day and I started writing in my journal, I'm angry. And I said, I'm angry, I'm angry, I'm angry. And then by the third time of saying I'm angry, I could then tap into what I was angry about. Okay. I'm angry about this. I'm angry about, and then suddenly the writing started

to evolve and develop. And then all of these things started to come out of me. So that's an exercise that I would still do for the majority of people, but in light of what's been happening on the planet and so many beautiful, amazing, lightworking, sensitive souls that are unfortunately misinterpreting a spiritual awakening and misinterpreting the ego death as a call for suicide or as a call to self-harm. It's such a tragic misinterpretation that I'm hoping to talk about more to get the word out. There are a lot of people going through spiritual awakenings and they don't know that that's what they're going through and they misinterpret ego death with the call to self-harm. I think that you literally, I was going to ask you about this

because you wrote about this in this book. You were saying that you were sharing that suicidal thoughts were coming up regularly and that that is natural. That doesn't mean you're supposed to kill yourself, but there is a part of you that is dying. And so it is normal to consider those death thoughts when you are doing that kind of energetic cleanse. So in light of what are you saying differently now? So now in light of what's happening right now and we're having a rise in suicides around the world, especially with sensitives, because it's really difficult to be on the planet right now and going through these awakenings are difficult right now. So what I would add to my previous exercise is talk to someone that has an understanding of the spiritual

aspect of life. We have got to get the word out and we have got to help people understand that the Western medical model, the Western psychological model will not help us entirely. it's great to go to therapy. It's great to talk to a psychotherapist. They're wonderful. But so many of us are going through spiritual awakenings and we need a different set of consciousness to be able to talk about things that a traditionally trained psychotherapist or psychiatrist will not get us there. Yeah. I mean, they'll also sometimes think you're crazy. I mean, you're not crazy. You're just ascending, right? But they'll be like, wait, you were talking to Jesus last night, I think you need to be medicated. Yes. Yeah. And so where does someone

find, I mean, I have some ideas, but what are you going to recommend in this video you're making or in the resources you're giving? Where does someone go? Because it's not like you're going to find, I mean, no offense, but you're not going to find this kind of spiritual support in church. Oh, no. Yes. It's beyond religion. Absolutely. Yeah. This is beyond religion. So I would even start with just getting the word out. So a lot of the things I'm talking about in the video is just those of us that are on this awakening journey, we're really here to help serve others also. What you do, what I do, just talking more about this, talking, talking, talking more about this, being on social media, making the spiritual side of life a different facet of this whole

model that we're in and that we have an openness now to talk about spirituality and that we're not crazy and that we're not in cults or none of this is happening. We're just opening up and giving assistance to a different aspect of life that needs to be honored in the same way that the mind needs to be honored or that reason needs to be honored or that science needs to be honored. And so the more that we just get out there and probably an easy exercise now for people is if you feel like you are going through this deep transformation, you have no idea what the hell is happening to you. You feel like aspects of yourself are dying. You feel like your personality is changing. You just feel all these different things that you cannot explain. Out of place.

Just go on YouTube and on that search bar, it's the second largest search engine in the world. Just go on YouTube and tap in your issue and just tap in spiritual explanation for or spiritual perspective on. So I haven't titled my video yet, but it's going to be something around of like the spiritual perspective on suicide so if you just input that into youtube you'll find my videos or you'll find something on you know by laura berman or you'll find something you know holistic psychologist i love her work also so i follow her work also and there's just so many of us out there that are breaking this glass ceiling of the western medical model and it needs to be shattered to pieces because in this next phase of our evolution the western medical model cannot

take us as far as we need to go in terms of the evolution of consciousness amen sister and it really is a bio psycho social spiritual journey we're on and the spiritual piece is more important than ever before you talk about sort of i know you got into it more in your first book but this kundalini basically awakening and that this idea of connecting to the kundalini i was wondering if could speak to this a little bit. Yeah. I actually don't talk about it in my first book. I talk about it only in the second book. Oh, you did? Yeah, yeah, yeah. In the first book, I hadn't gone through this. I wrote the first book really quickly right in that first year of my awakening. My kundalini awakening happened in 2014. And that's where pretty much the second book kind

of takes off around that kundalini awakening. The beginning of the book talks about that. And that is also happening spontaneously to a lot of people around the world. I'm asking. You call it the dynamic feminine force of consciousness. And so I just wanted you to explain that to us so people can understand. Because, you know, you hear Kundalini and you think, okay, it's a snake. What is this energy? It's inside me. You hear about people going crazy when their Kundalini awakens. so yeah a lot of the knowledge around kundalini has you know fortunately been passed down to us by previous generations and especially really really honored systems like the yogic tradition talks a lot about kundalini kundalini is also talked about in shamanic tradition but i think in the yogic tradition there's a strong aspect of written history of writing things down and so a lot of the written materials that we have around kundalini are more commonly now coming from yogic

tradition. The shamanic traditions are more traditions of passing down knowledge through word of mouth and through apprenticeship, through direct apprenticeship. They don't write as much down. So a lot of the kundalini knowledge is coming from yogic tradition and it's described as a feminine force, like a serpent that's coiled at the bottom of your sacrum, that's the tip of your spine. And that in some of us, that force will awaken if it has a soul contract with you. I researched a lot about this when I was going through my Kundalini Awakened, because I didn't even know what the heck was happening to me when it happened to me. It was very shocking. And what happened? What did you experience? Well, I think probably the most difficult thing for me is, you know, like I'm an expert in the human body. I was a physical therapist. I'm a trained physical therapist.

So imagine I'm sitting in meditation and something just pops in my spine and suddenly my body starts moving involuntarily and I cannot stop it. And imagine my physical therapist brain going, these are voluntary muscles. Yeah, I should be able to stop moving voluntary muscles. If I can't stop moving voluntary muscles, holy shit, what the hell is happening to me? And so I kind of panicked a little bit. And then I just calmed down and I called on my master guide at the time was Jesus. So I called on him again. And it was actually an embodiment exercise that I was doing with that guru, with Jesus as a guru, that actually sparked my kundalini awakening in the first place. And so then I started to panic a little bit, but then I calmed down. And then the weeks after that were probably the most difficult of my spiritual awakening. I went into what some call, what Stan and Christina Groff call a spiritual emergency. And I love that. I love that term. And so this force, basically, it's your energy. You can think of it kind of like, you know, those race cars that they sometimes juice

them up and you hit a button. And when you hit that button, the nitrogen kicks in. Yeah, the nitrogen kicks in and the car just suddenly takes off. That's literally what kundalini energy is. It's your energy, but it's a percentage of your energy that's stored in that spine. and it'll awaken if it has a soul contract with you in this life. Meaning if you need that advancement,

if you need that extra energy for something you're doing down here. And the thing that I like to tell people is a kundalini awakening is never about you being better than someone else or more evolved than someone else. So someone that doesn't have a kundalini awakening is not less evolved than someone who does.

So I like to kind of take that charge out of it because a lot of times, especially through kundalini yoga, people have been practicing kundalini yoga a lot through the ego. and they've been following masters for a really long time trying to get their kundalini awakened and then suddenly a bunch of us start waking up and we're like oh i just had a kundalini awakening by myself and then that starts to jar some right i've been working on that for 20 years

yeah i've had i've been contacted by more than one kundalini yoga expert that's told me that i shouldn't be talking about these things because i wasn't guided by a master and so a lot of egos are rattled with this stuff, but the truth is a lot of people are Kundalini is not, it doesn't belong to anyone. It's a part, it's an energy that's a part of you. And it is waking up spontaneously without the use of a guru or a teacher for many of us. So we have to know how to deal with it. All of us do. So if that energy wakes up in you, it is so powerful that it will literally accelerate your spiritual development in various areas. But that acceleration can be exhilarating at times and it can be very difficult almost to the point of insanity sometimes because

it's pushing and it's just burning away everything that is not meant to be in your life. And that can be really scary when you're going through a process of change. What does that look like in action? Is it physical symptoms, emotional symptoms? Yeah. So I had a couple of things happened that were a little bit scary at first, but thankfully my antennas were wide open and I was getting so much guidance from my guides at the time. I didn't have a lot of people that I could talk to about this. I didn't have anyone in my life that knew what the heck was happening. So I relied on my spirit guides a lot. And a couple of things happened that were more frightening to me. One was extreme physical symptoms. There were times where I said to myself, I'm either dying,

I'm literally dying of something because I had wild physical symptoms. I had pain in my body from the tips of my hair to the tips of my toes. Sometimes I couldn't even touch my skin. I was burning. I felt like I was burning from the inside out. The sensation of incinerating was so strong that I'd get up at three o'clock in the morning and I'd literally stand in front of my refrigerator naked. I'd open the refrigerator door and that was the only thing that could calm the energy

down. Extreme exhaustion. Sometimes I couldn't even walk up a flight of stairs. That's how severe this was. So I had a lot of physical symptoms that were very problematic to deal with. And then at the same time, I had an opening of the third eye and a removal of spiritual veils. So a lot of mental symptoms came with that.

So I'd be washing dishes and randomly I'd have just an influx of past life memories of things that had happened to me in past lives. And a lot of people say, oh my God, I wish I knew what had happened to me in a past life. Well, if that happens to you at all at once, when you're standing in this physical avatar, let me tell you, it is not pretty. It's very discombobulating. You lose your sense of self. You have no idea. Like, are you there? Am I here? Am I there? Where am I? So that was the mental symptoms were difficult. And then the suicidal ideation was very difficult because it was very confusing for me. I chronicle this in my first book. I had almost taken my life a couple of times as a teenager. And so I had dealt with suicidal ideation to the point of almost going through with it as a teenager. And so now here I am in what felt like the best period of my life. I was awake. I was excited. I was just, all of these things were opening up. And then suddenly the suicidal ideation comes up again. And I'm so confused because I'm like, how can I be as happy as a clam, but then suicidal? Does this make any sense? This doesn't make any sense.

And so fortunately for me, I found an amazing book on Kundalini Awakening by Genevieve Paulson. I don't remember the title, but I can send it to you. I think it's, if you look up Genevieve Paulson and Kundalini, it'll come up. The title of the book will come up. Yeah. But it talked about a Kundalini Awakening and it talked about suicidal ideation being one of the most common symptoms of a Kundalini awakening, because literally what happens is your ego is dying. Your personality is dying. All of your old patterns are dying. And it's very

easy for your mind to confuse that death with the wanting to annihilate the self or the body and to misinterpret that. Because there is a part of you that is being called to kill a part of yourself, but it is not literally killing yourself. It is killing that part of yourself that holds the old limiting beliefs and the old traumas and the old stories. It's releasing that. Yes, yes. The part of you that's dying is literally the self that had made this construction of what you think you are in the world. And so, as that identity falls, it's very frequent for people to misinterpret that as a call to kill the body. It's a really tragic misinterpretation. I was very fortunate in the sense that I found that book. I don't think at the time when I was going

through my kundalini awakening, I wasn't in the same state of consciousness that I was as a teenager. I don't think I would have acted on it, but it was still very, very frightening to go through the same, literally I was reliving my teenage years. And then I realized that aside from a kundalini awakening or a spiritual emergency, very frequently causing suicidal ideation, I was also bringing up all of the trauma of that period of my life that included the time that I was suicidal. And so all of that was coming up and it was coming up to be seen and healed. And so I was just getting temporarily mixed up and freaked out about the material that was coming up. And so one of the things that helps people a lot when they're going through spiritual emergencies or kundalini awakenings now, and this is, you know, Master Yeshua taught me this, is to just become an expert at observing without getting involved.

As most of you know, for the past several years, I've been on a pretty intense grief journey, and it's been a path of healing. I've shared lots of that healing with you and lots of the healing resources that I found. And I am so thrilled to announce that I am doing my first ever retreat for grieving mamas. So if you or someone you love is a mama who has lost a child in any way, at any stage, at any age, I would love for you to come join me at 1440 Multiversity in the Redwoods near Santa Cruz, California for four amazing days of beautiful, uplifting community and healing. We've got David Kessler. We've got Paul Selig.

We've got Catherine Woodward Thomas. We've got me. We've got body work. We've got organic food, beautiful rooms. Go to 1440.org. Check it out. It's right there on the homepage. I really hope you can join us.

Observe without getting involved. Observe without getting involved. So your mind says, oh, you know, I just want to kill myself. Observe without getting involved. and if you do that the thought will start to dissipate it only sticks around if you start grabbing on it and so that was something that i had to learn very quickly during my kundalini awakening because there was just so much going on yeah and i can imagine it coming with that level of intensity it's a lot and so it makes sense is your so is your theory that what's

happening right now and the reason so many are taking their lives is that they're getting mixed up that way? Or is there something happening in the ascension itself that's getting... There are a couple of things going on. All of our old outdated models are being cracked. One old outdated model is the Western medical system, especially pertaining to psychological disorders or psychological disease not just psychological disease any disease all of the western model is being broken apart and we are learning what well-being means what health means we're learning the tremendous capacity of the body to heal itself we're learning a lot of things so this rigid rigid western model is completely shattering and so all of these outdated models

are shattering but at the same time that this is happening we're having a mass awakening on the planet. And millions of people are going through a spiritual awakening without knowing that that is what's happening to them. And so what ends up happening is they're going through these profound transformations. If they are in a Western society, the first thing they are going to think is I'm positively losing my freaking mind. And if I go see a psychiatrist, they're going to say I'm hallucinating. If I go see a psychologist, they're going to say I need to go see a psychiatrist to put me on a pill. And so the Western model cannot hold this level of consciousness that's occurring right now. So a lot of people are feeling limited. They're feeling

limited because I think on a lot of levels, people realize, I mean, thousands of people reach me and a lot of them have the same story. And that is, I started with a psychotherapist, but I need something more. I need something more. And this is nothing against psychotherapists. I work with psychotherapists too. And there's an amazing thing happening in the helping professions. They're also having awakenings and then they're getting trained. They're going out there and they're learning about transpersonal psychology or they're learning about spirituality. They're learning about chakras. They're learning about all of these things. So the transformation is happening even within the system. But in the meantime, while this system is still not completely

collapsed, a lot of us are getting stuck in the crosshairs. So that is happening. These people are getting stuck in these rigid models that no longer serve us and on the other hand like no one can help them because they don't totally helpless happening yeah exactly and because i think i think there's a part of them that knows that the help they need is beyond what a traditional psychotherapist can give them or a traditional psychiatrist can give them and so literally their whole system feels like they have no way out if i go talk to this person they're going to think i'm crazy So this is happening in a lot of people's minds right now. So that's one aspect. Another aspect that's happening is we're going through a process of enormous change on this planet very quickly. I'm shooting another video on the energies of 2023. And thankfully, when I sat down to meditate on the energies, they're a lot lighter than they have been from 2020 to 2022. too. But we're still going through it. And this period of rapid transformation is causing a lot

of chaos energetically on the planet. And for those of us that are really sensitive, being down here right now is not easy, especially if you do not have the spiritual mindfulness practices that are necessary to keep your energy clear, keep yourself grounded, and keep your attention focused, focused, focused, focused on your creator, focused on the light that you are here to share, focused on the big heart, focused on the strength of your energy, focused on just who you are and why you are here. And so if you're not aware of those practices, I have so much compassion because how lost can you feel down here right now, especially if you're sensitive. And I've been thinking a lot about Twitch, you know, like I was a huge fan of the Ellen show and just

he was such this beautiful beautiful kind sensitive you could tell you can tell just watching the show you know you could tell and it's just it's a tragedy for me i've really felt this really personally it's such a tragedy it's always a tragedy for me when a light worker leaves this planet prematurely it's such a tragedy to me and i almost feel that personally because i feel like oh my god can this message just please reach more people so that these beautiful light workers that are here to help change the world don't leave prematurely you know because we need them so you think your theory is that this is mine too is that he like so many of us was just being overwhelmed by the chaos that's happening was awakening to a new reality and had no capacity

to no understanding and isn't in a world where he would have access or even think to access. I mean, he could have access to anything he wanted, but that it didn't occur. And his reality wasn't set up yet to access the spiritual support that he really needed. Yeah. And I think right now, the more community we have in spiritual circles, the more we reach out to each other. This is so important right now. Connection is so important right now. Being able to provide communities, even if it's just an online community where people can go and they just comment on your videos. Laura, they comment on my videos. They're on our Instagram. That's a sense of community because people can read through the communities that they belong that, wow, look, this person is

going through the same thing I'm going through. I'm not alone. I'm not insane. So many people are going through the same thing. And so more and more, those of us that have the awareness and the knowing of what we're doing here are here to also be the beacons to help those who are just awakening to that and they're awakening to their gifts and they're awakening to their light, but they just don't quite know how to get there yet. It also brings a level of responsibility for all of us that are here. If you have an idea of what you are doing here, it's a big responsibility you know because at the end of the day like we really are lighthouses for so many people there are seven billion over seven billion people on the planet now and there aren't that many of us

that are lighthouses right now and so we need to first of all take care of ourselves so so well i learned that the hard way right i had to go through a burnout to learn that yeah me too take care of yourself and then keep your light shining. Don't ever lose sight of your Northern star. Yeah. I love that quote. You were quoting, I don't remember who you were quoting, but you were referring the lighthouse analogy reminded me that a lighthouse doesn't go around the island looking for somewhere to shine its light. It stays in the same place and illuminates, right? It's just shining. And you talk a lot and I am 100% with you. You don't frame it this way. I do, but basically this journey, I guess, of the healer, of the light worker, as you say,

is heal, learn, teach, right? And that the good teacher walks over the hot coals before she can teach someone else to do it. And in my life, I talk about this a lot. My whole universe is healer and teach, healer and teach, healer and teach, even, you know, not necessarily, usually in that order, sometimes in a spiral, but that's really a big part of the journey that unfolds in walking with the masters, right? That you're healing and you're learning. And as you're talking about learning, you're also creating from that place of learning and you're then healing at the same time. And I want to talk to you, especially in light of what we're discussing, people feeling crazy and accessing what's happening now at the mass awakening or the mass ascension,

similar to what you were saying, where the veil had kind of been lifted to differing degrees for all of us, the veil is being lifted. And so we are, as our consciousness expands, we're also not even meaning to accessing and connecting with energies from beyond the veil, right? So like in my situation, as my, I had always kind of connected and then I shut that all down because I was scared shitless as a little girl and no one could tell me that it was what to do with it, much less that it was real. So then I really did think it was even scarier when no one else thought it was real. And so I just shut that shit down. And then it opened back up a little bit in my initial spiritual awakening, but in this reawakening a few years ago, when, especially

when my son died and I was like, okay, it actually was probably six months before, strangely, I was even willing to connect with him. I'm still not a hundred percent sure why. I think I just wasn't ready. I had all sorts of stories. Maybe I'm mad at him, maybe I'm, but whatever. As I finally was ready. I started sort of calling that in and first he came into dreams. And I love the way you talk because this is literally what I have been trying to explain to people is that each of us has this unique energetic signature. And you literally use that term, which made me so happy. You were talking about connecting to your guides, right? Beyond Jesus, not only Jesus, but all the other guides around us. And also the other important thing you just said, even during this conversation,

and I know you allude to a lot in the book, is this idea of our guides are there, ready, wanting, willing to help us, but we have to ask, right? So when Jesus first spoke to you and you had that first, you had said like, help, what the hell do I do, right? You invited in the help. And so that happens in the story you're telling of walking with the masters, but each master, And I think the first one that you connect to in this story is who eventually gets the name, the sorceress, right? Your essential self, your true self, your God self, your soul self, your higher self, as some might call it. And she is sort of knows everything that's ever, you know, our essential self, we all have one, right? Knows everything that's ever happened to

it's every life we've ever lived, everything, right? It's the awareness beyond the senses. But what I loved is this, I think she said it and then it kept coming up as you started meeting these other masters and guides, recognize my energy signature so that you know when I'm coming through, so that you know when I'm coming in. And I just was wondering if you can share some of that and also the how to access, you know, as you were learning to channel basically in this journey, you're describing that you were accessing this divine wisdom, right? That's available to all of us in part by calling it in, in part by quieting the mind, in part by going through heaven, as you call it. But I was wondering if you could describe that a little bit. Yeah. So I think you described

the steps really well. So the first step here for me, the intention, the calling in. When I started to do this is really when I realized how shut down I was. I was so shut down by trauma that I even had difficulty calling in any type of spiritual guidance. I remember I talk about this in the first book more, but I was angry at God for a really long time. And so when you're angry at your creator, at the universe, at life, whatever you want to call it, it's virtually impossible for you to call in any help because your anger blocks that. So I started to release that. And the moment that I started to intend to connect, please help me in any capacity that you can. I opened myself up for my spirit guides of the highest order to intervene in my life as they

see fit. This is one of my favorite mantras that I use on a daily basis almost. All right. Say it again? What's the mantra? So I call on my spirit guides to intervene in my life in any way they see fit. So I give an open invitation to my guides. So I don't usually go, Hey, Hey, Archangel Michael, can you help me out with this? Sometimes I'll say that, but I prefer to give open-ended invitations because I know that my spirit, yeah, wide open invitations because I know, but exactly. Cause I know that this mind is extremely limited. So I may need something that I don't even know I need. So, Hey, I'm just going to release control. And I'm going to say, please intervene in my life as you see fit. Now, this could be a really scary mantra because

sometimes your spirit guides can say, Ooh, wow. Okay. Well, we need to destroy all the stuff you got going on in your life. Cause it no longer serves you. And so suddenly then you're like, what just happened? How is my life getting destroyed? And your spirit guides are like, like, yeah, you asked for assistance. Here we are. Right. You asked for it. Yeah, exactly. So it can be a little scary at first, but that intention is really important in opening the door. Another equally important thing, especially if you want to learn how to directly channel spirit beings, we all have that capacity. It isn't a gift that only some of us have. We all have that capacity to a certain extent. Some of us more than others, depending on our life mission,

but we all have that capacity, is that you need to sensitize your system. Your mind needs to quiet down. That never shuts up. That never shuts up. That ego, that monkey mind, the default mode network, as science calls it, that default mode needs to quiet down for you to be able to then start to have access. The more the mind quiets down, the more the nervous system quiets down. and the more the nervous system quiets down, the more it is easy to pick up on subtle sensory input that's coming from spirit. So that is absolutely, absolutely key.

And the other thing that happened to me that I talk about the book that's also amazing, the more that you open yourself up to these guides, they'll leave what my guides have called flowers. So when they come to visit you, when you are visited by a beautiful spirit guide, they don't just interact with your energy system, they leave you a gift and my higher self calls them flowers. Because something was happening to

me when I was channeling these beings. Every time I'd finished channeling a being, I'd wake up the next morning and I'd feel completely different. And I remember this happened to me one day. I was channeling a deceased nun that's very famous here in Portugal. And her energy, when I channeled her, her name is Sister Lucia, when I channeled her at the moment, she just transmitted this peace and this calm that I had never felt before. And I was like, wow, that's so juicy. That's amazing. And so, all right, I channel her. I go to bed and I wake up the next morning and I felt that peace. And I was like, okay, I'm confused. Is she here again? Is she here? I was a little bit confused. She left that energy imprint behind. So now it was a part of me. And so that was probably one

of the most mesmerizing aspects of this story that I tell and of the endless channelings that I've had with guides is that they change you as they are interacting with you. That's how much they love us. That's how much they're here to accompany us. So just open yourself up to that open, open, open, and they will help in the transformation. Yeah, they really do. And you talked also about, because I want to mention this because people do get nervous about this when they say, okay, I opened myself up, right? I'm opening the channels. Then the next question that a lot of people will go to when I talk about this is like, okay, well, what about all the evil entities? What about, you know, I'm opening the door. It's dangerous to open the door. Don't open

the door because the baddies can get in. And I know you have a lot of guidance, much of which you share in this story, but I was wondering if you can speak to that. So usually people that have those questions or that say those things, they're usually templated with religious beliefs. So even if you're not religious, we're templated with those, with those beliefs, whether we know it or not from all the scary movies in Hollywood, all the possession movies, all the stuff that's been going on. We're all templated. Yeah. The exorcist, the God knows what, like we've all been templated with this fear of opening up to connect directly to spirit, but this has been imbued on us. This has been templated and programmed on us very much by religion. And,

And, you know, the agenda was always to remain, to have us disconnected from our own innate spiritual connection. Because if we could connect directly to God and directly to spirit, why would we need to go to a church? Why would we need a priest? Why would we need a rabbi? Why would we need any of the authority figures? Why would we need to give tithings, basically, is what it comes down to.

Exactly, exactly, exactly, exactly. So it was done as a form of control. So now we just have to deprogram ourselves with all of those shenanigans. Now, this is not to say that all of spirit is wonderful and fuzzy and amazing. No, there are different energies in spirit, as there are different people and races on earth and energies on earth, you know, and the way that I like to talk about it is, you know, there are some people you walk down the street, and there's a really, really angry person screaming drunk person that crosses the street. Am I going to want to stand there and interact with that person? No, I'm not going to want to stand there and interact with that person. So I just walk right by. I bid the person farewell.

I walk right by, but I don't permit that person to be in my presence. That is my choice in this reality. You have the same choice in spirit. If there is an energy that doesn't feel good on your body, and that's how my guides trained me, if the energy, you will know when a lower level energy comes to interact with your energy system, it's impossible. It happened to me always as a child. that's why I shut down this gift. I was very pestered as a child. And so I know what these

entities feel like. It feels gross on the body. It feels heavy on the body. It's, you cannot, you can't mistake it. It feels dark, dense and gross and yicky. If that energy comes to interact with you, all you have to do is you just say, I send you away with love and kindness. And what I, I haven't been visited by dark entities in a really long time, but what I ended up doing was i'd open a light portal in the room and i still do this at my retreats i'll open light portals in the room and i will say to the entity may you please go back to god to be recycled it's a very it's a very matter of love is what i very matter of fact yeah yeah it's a very matter of fact way of dealing with shadow or with darker entities but ultimately if we all remember that any shadow

entity is merely an entity that has been so removed from its creator that it no longer remembers that it is love. That is all that shadow is. That's all that the devil is or evil is. That's all that it is. It's an energy that has been so far removed from its creator that it no longer remembers that it is love. And so the best thing for you to do on this planet to clear the energy of all dense energy is you just open a light portal and you say, may you please go back to God so that you can find love again. May you go back to God to be recycled. And that's literally what I do. It's very simple. You don't need to be scared. You don't need to be afraid. Movies like, you know, The Exorcism or Crapola. It's just not real. Yeah. And I love about what you said is that

they forget the darkness. And this is true in humans too, whether it's Hitler or whoever in modern politics, that those people are loved too. They just have been damaged, wounded, injured, forgotten, that they are loved. And your guides speak in this book about this, this idea that the best way to deal with your shadows is by recognizing the love they are, sending them back to love, but not by making them wrong or bad or putting more hate on them. It's about really remembering the essence of who they are, even beyond that doesn't excuse them. That doesn't mean you want to sit down to Thanksgiving dinner with them. That doesn't mean you want to invite them into your bedroom or into your home, but it does mean that that's different than,

than disconnecting from the love, like recognizing the love in someone else, even when they're doing something really horrible, I think. And you can do that from afar. I don't think you need to do that in your living room. Yeah. That was one of the biggest lessons that I had from my guides was really... Because it was one of my biggest fears as a child. One of the reasons I had closed this door was because I was afraid of the interactions I was having with lower energy beings at the time. I didn't realize though, that I was having these interactions with lower energy beings because I was in a state of constant fear. And that's a big lesson for people. shadow energies feed off of fear yes they don't feed off of love so the antidote to a shadow

entity the antidote to clearing these energies and transmuting them is by loving them and this is very this is very revolutionary especially if you come from a religious model because the religious model wants to just damn people to hell or send these things back to the devil or whatever it is. It's all about this kind of separation consciousness. And my guides were very, very clear on saying that just like we are all evolving, so is shadow. The shadow realm is also evolving and everybody's evolution is the same. It's through love. Right. Right. That's so powerful. And I want to speak to love a little bit more from the heart center because you alluded to this a little bit of recognizing part of it is that we have to start

getting back into our bodies, that our bodies are the bridge to the soul, but also, and you write about this, that the heart is the bridge between sort of the lower and the higher, the earth and above, the lower chakras and the higher chakras, and how powerful the heart center is. I've been saying for years, that's how I know when something is the truth or not, because I used to depend on my brain a lot more than I do now. But when you run something through your heart, that's when you know if it's really true or not, if it's right or not, because it gives you a signal. And I want to ask you about that. But one of the things that I thought that really struck me that you wrote about and it made so much sense, and I've never really thought about it this way, is that you spend a lot

of time in the storytelling and in recounting your journey because there was a lot of kind of abundance blocks you were working through and fears around scarcity. And so you get into manifesting and this idea of when you're manifesting a desire, because obviously there's so much written and taught about manifesting. And I have this manifesting course that we all are teaching manifesting. We're all doing manifesting. We're all manifesting all the time. But when people talk about a lot of what I talk about when I try to teach manifesting is to really attune to the energy of the feeling you will or would or do feel, assuming all things are happening in the present, right? When that thing that you want to bring into manifestation happens, right? That is

not about saying, I want an orange car of this brand or this, that those can be cues or catalysts, but really how will you feel? How do you feel if it were happening in this now moment, driving that car that you're manifesting or waking up next to that person or that relationship that you're manifesting. But what I thought was really powerful, and I was wondering if you could speak to a little bit that you wrote about, is how much more powerful manifesting from your heart's desires versus what you think of that you want to create. Oh, I want to be on stage. I want to move to this place. I want to have this relationship. The difference just creating, like the Course in Miracles says, right? The longest distance is from the mind to the heart,

right? Can you speak to that? Not only how much more powerful it is, but how to work with that, how to know the difference? I think the biggest way to start working with the heart is the easiest way is to release the outcome. If you release the outcome, the moment that you release the outcome, you're releasing a mental desire. You're releasing the image of what your manifestation supposedly should look like. If you release it, and I remember this was a really hard lesson for me. I'm still mind dominant to a certain degree. Every day I learn how to work with this heart of mine and it still has blocks and it still has veils. And I feel like this is a lifelong process for all of us really to learn how to work. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. But I remember connecting with

with, I talk about it in the book, I connected with a group consciousness and they gave this beautiful example of, I was in love with a woman at the time and my mind was just fixated that it had to be this person, whatever. And then one day I'm hiking. Yeah. Yeah. And then one day I'm hiking and I get this direct channel from a group consciousness. I had never connected to a group consciousness before. And they gave this beautiful example of how I'm a spider and I just need to create my web. And the spider creates a beautiful, intricate web, but the spider never asks for a particular prey. The spider just does her work. She just does her work and she sits at the center of her once the work is finished she sits at the center of her web and she waits she doesn't wait

with fear she doesn't wait with she just waits but she doesn't have a particular outcome in sight and an example they gave was imagine if a spider suddenly decided that she wanted a rabbit as her prey the rabbit would come through it would destroy the web and then she would be left without anything. Why? Because that rabbit wasn't the appropriate prey for that spider. And so if the spider just removes any desires, I don't care. I'm just going to sit here. I'm going to do my work. I'm going to sit here. And if the spider just says, may the highest prey, may what I need come to me at the right time, then suddenly pretty soon a fly is going to land. And it was a fly that she needed all along. And that image was really, really important for me in learning how to release

outcomes. And that's another way of just saying how to work with your heart because a lot of times you don't know what your heart wants to manifest because the heart doesn't work in images. The heart doesn't work in words. Eventually, it'll turn it into images and it'll turn it into words when it flashes its desires up to the brain. But initially, when you're marinating in the heart's desires and you don't know what the heart really wants, the best thing you can do is just surrender any mental expectations that you have. And you just keep saying to the universe, may my highest path manifest in whatever form it needs to manifest. I love that path. I love that path too. And I'm going to add a layer to it from something else you were writing

about in this regard, especially around manifesting. You allude, I forget who the teachers were that talk about this. I've heard this too, but you were talking about this analogy or this metaphor of the boomerang, right? The manifesting is throwing out a boomerang and how the higher the energetic frequency, the energetic state, and these guys know I talk from quantum love perspective about our energetic frequency

and the frequency from which we're always attracting in and are a frequency match for where our energetic frequency is, right? So the metaphor being the top of a high building, AKA a high frequency, right? That if you were to throw that boomerang out from the roof deck of this building, right, and then you were to drop down to the basement, the boomerang is going to come back. You're not going to be there to catch it. But more importantly, it's much more fun up on the beautiful, sunny, gorgeous roof deck than down in the dark basement.

So it's also about not even worrying about the boomerang coming back, when it's coming back, or if you're going to catch it. You forget about it. you forget about it because you're having so much fun playing on the roof deck. So I wanted you to come in on that. And also about this reminds me of one of your most powerful masters. I have a master like this too, who's been teaching me so much. She's a much younger version of it. So I don't know if she's a master, but she's definitely a guide, a much younger version of myself who shut down from play. Right. And you have this guide, one of your guides, I think you just called the child, but she was one of your most powerful guides because she was like, listen,

You want to get in your heart. You want to get in the high frequency. You want the secrets to the universe. It starts with play, right? Yeah. And so that connection between playing on, you know, that image, that metaphor I'm going to hold on to for a long time of playing on in the roof garden is regardless. Regardless of if those boomerangs come back, regardless. And this is really, you know, even after I wrote this book, I wrote this book in 2015, the original manuscript was written there. So even after 2015, so much has already happened too. And kind of the continuation of the energy of that book has really been an energy of surrendering outcomes, of just surrendering. And I've learned so much from teachers like Tosha

Silver, from teachers like Michael Singer, the surrender experiment. So these are two of my favorite teachers on the art of just surrendering, on the art of understanding that the universe has the wherewithal to bring you more than you could ever possibly put on your vision board. More, more, more. So, all right, then I'm just going to surrender it and I'm going to keep playing. I'm going to keep staying in that high vibrational energy and I'm going to keep just being grateful. And that's what I did actually in the book. When I wrote this book, I was going through a lot of issues. I had lost all my money. I didn't have any money. My bank account was completely drained and I was still feeling called to stay in this hermit mode. So I was so confused,

like, hello, am I supposed to go back to getting abundant? Like why does a does not lead to be here folks? Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. Also very important. Another comment around having your tribe. You also had your whole reality where people are like, yeah, a does not lead to be from where I'm sitting. Right. So you were getting a lot of external pressure. I remember, I remember, you know, like my mother, God bless her soul. My mother was, you know, she's a Capricorn, very, very like earth person. And when I, you know, when I quit my job and I started going on this spiritual path, she had no idea what the heck was going on. And in her mind, she's like, wait, you just spent 10 years of your life getting a doctorate degree and now you're just going to quit your career. I don't understand. I don't know what's happening to you. And at the moment, the only thing I said to my mother was, you know, like, I understand this is not making any sense right now, but I just need you to trust me and someday this will make sense. And so it was really, really cool to kind of see the, you know, to kind of see the full circle on that. My mom came to our retreat actually in April here in Portugal. We had a 110 person retreat and she was just walking around.

It was so much fun. Everybody calling her mama. And that's really when my mother finally saw what I had been talking about years before. Sometimes it takes time, but you have to trust yourself more than anything else, more than anyone, even the people you love the most. You have to trust yourself that the path will continue to unfold as it's meant to unfold. Just release the outcome. Be very grateful.

I remember my lowest, I literally would wake up and I'd just be grateful that I had a warm cup of coffee to drink. Yeah, I've been there where I'm just like, you know what? In this moment, I have absolutely everything that I could ever need. And that's all that's real. I have air. I have food. I have shelter.

I have love. That's it. And I love how what you were asking your mother to do, right? Just trust me. Yeah, I know you can't see it now. just trust me, is really what spirit was asking of you at the same time. Right. And so I think both are necessary, but you're absolutely right. And now here you are five to seven, however many years it's been since then. Right. Where there's plenty of abundance and you have love and you're

married. Right. Again, I'm not. No, no, I am not married. No, not married. Not married. Okay. sorry, sorry, but you are in a love relationship. No, I'm, I'm still single, still single. I thought you were in a love relationship. Okay. Sorry. No, no, no. Well, tell us what your status is. Well, I have very strong soul connections and I'm, you know, I'm just. Did I make you blush? I think I did. I think maybe, maybe. Yeah. My, my love life is a, is a part that I kind of try in keeping wraps because I have some stalker issues. So I try to, we don't have to get into it. No, it's okay. We can. It's okay. We can. This is one of the, one of the areas of my life that I keep open and that I know the sacred partner is there and she will manifest when it's

in due time, when it's the right time. I'm not worried about that. I'm that spider in the middle of the, of the spider web, just saying to the universe, you know, when the right prey comes, I'll be happy. I'll wrap it up and eat it. I love that. I have no doubt. Well, you certainly are beyond, beyond lovable. And we are so grateful for you and that all that you're doing for the planet and for the light and for all of us. And the book is, you can get it Amazon or wherever books are sold, Walking with the Masters, right? Is it on Audible as well yet? It's not on Audible yet. I've been getting a lot of feedback. So that's probably

going to be one of the projects for 2023 is going to get these, my two books on Audible. Cause I know a lot of people listen to audio books now, so we're going to try and get it done. We're going to try and get it done. All right, good. In the meantime, they can listen to this to get the gist and definitely read the book. And thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you, sister. I went to the doctor Said I'm crazy for your love Wrote me a prescription But there's no cure for crying